otp: it was illuminating


the lizzie bennet diaries meme:

two ships; william darcy and lizzie bennet
“I’m going to remember this forever, I realized. This moment, where William Darcy came to dinner and met my family. As my boyfriend. As the most important person in my life. And that he survived it with aplomb. This is the beginning.“


every time lexa says clarke’s name: 10/?

Taken from the final chapter of my Ash x Johnny NSFW fanfiction, Stay With Me”. (take heed of the Mature rating before you click the link below.)

Glancing down, Johnny took in her lax face. Even with smudged eyeshadow, mushed quills, and cheek squished against his chest, Ash was still breathtakingly beautiful. Curvy figure drowning in his green and gold sweater, so cozy and warm as she draped herself over him. Johnny could scarcely remember a time in which he’d been more content with life…how this rocker rebel had stolen his heart and he never wanted it back.

Ash suddenly shifted in his arms, burrowing her nose into his throat before she became still again. One of her hands grasping at his fur when a contented sigh escaped; joined shortly afterward with a mumbled, “g'nite” whispered into his fur.

“Night, Love.” Johnny smiled, cheeks burning as he pressed his cheek to her forehead.

                                      (KEEP READING)

If you’re interested, I also did a NSFW accompanying pict to go with the chapter as well. ;-p


Stay With Me - Chapter 1

Rated: T/M

Story Summary: First times are never easy…especially with someone as innocent and pure as Johnny. Yet, Ash is determined to make it work.



P.S. In this universe, Ash and Johnny are both 18 or over; I do not condone underage sex.

P.P.S. This will be at least four chapters long and there will be no sex in the first two so I’m not marking this nsfw…yet. ;-)

In all honesty, sex wasn’t too high up on Ash’s priority list.

Between singing, gigs, writing music, friends, and an all around hectic lifestyle, it was more or less forgotten about or pushed to the side in favor of more important things. It didn’t mean she didn’t think about it - especially when she and Johnny began dating within weeks after the Moon Theater began renovations, it just wasn’t necessary.

…well, at first anyway…

That was almost a year ago and her feelings were quickly shifting and evolving faster than she could keep up with.

Initially, it was bearable since the two were so enthralled with their work, solo albums, shows, performances and the like that even going out to dinner or watching a movie seemed an impossible luxury most times. Their life consisted of working tireless hours in the studio or with Buster practicing for some musical, performance, etc. Being career musicians and singers now was their priority and they both were determined to make sure they made the most of it.

As time ticked by, and even considering as busy as they were, the allure of love and making it was becoming hard to ignore for Ash.

Johnny was so sweet; gentle, loving and as pure and innocent as anyone could possibly get. Considerate, kind-hearted and an all around great guy that any girl would kill to have…and he was hers.

Truthfully, she didn’t know exactly what attracted them to one another.

Perhaps it was their own difficulties stemming from home; unstable personal lives that had them connecting at first. Her painful break-up from her cheating ex and his father and uncles’ possibility of spending the rest of their lives behind bars were always hot topics that neither shied away from confiding in one another about. Johnny was a listening ear and sympathetic, non-judgmental shoulder to cry on and she was his. At least she hoped that’s how it was for him.

Not gonna lie - there was also an immediate physical attraction that at first, she denied valiantly. Yet, setting her physical desires for the young gorilla aside, he had turned out to be the best thing that ever happened to her.

So much so that Lance was barely an annoying blip in her subconscious anymore.

Yet…sex was different subject altogether.

Johnny, in all senses of the word, was as pure as freshly fallen snow. He’d never even had a single date, held hands or kissed another girl before her. A virgin; a sweet, soulful loving boy who was so soft-spoken and gentle that it seemed almost unfeasible that he’d ever had an impure thought in his entire life.

It wouldn’t have been a problem; they’d take it ultra slow until he was good and ready but there was a hurdle she was not yet ready to jump over - she was a teenager with all the raging hormones included.

Yeah, with Lance it was almost immediate; she’d lost her virginity many years ago and the sex they had wasn’t anything spectacular. He was her first and only so what the hell did she know? All she knew was that it never lasted particularly long and felt pretty good during but it wasn’t anything amazing; nothing like the euphoria her girlfriends described.

After the initial first months, it was a pretty rare occasion that she was never one to initiate. They’d be talking in bed than without much of a warning, Lance would roll on top of her. Kiss her and touch her between her legs for a moment; just enough for her to get a tiny bit aroused before he pushed inside of her. It would all be over immediately after he finished, which wasn’t long; stamina was not Lance’s strong suit. She wasn’t fully satisfied by the time he rolled off of her, but she typically just took care of herself after he was already fast asleep beside her.

That was about the extent of it all.

No foreplay, basically non-existant oral, and they’d be done before she realized what happened most times. Long story short, most of their sexual trysts left her feeling greatly unsatisfied. So, yeah, sex wasn’t all too big a deal when she was with Lance.

The instant she got with Johnny, however, something in her body completely shifted.

Perhaps it was because the young gorilla was unbelievably attractive. Tall, broad shouldered, muscular, had the greatest smile, voice that had her heart accelerating in her chest, and to top it all off - he was so humble!

Lips pursing and an unpleasant twinge in her gut when she thought of her opposite ex.

Lance was basically allergic to exercise and ate copious amount of junk food which really didn’t help . Decent enough voice but smug attitude that was a huge turn-off. At the time, it was fine, but when she met Johnny, it capsized the boat of whatever standards she may have had prior.

Gorgeous face and body aside, Johnny’s personality far outweighed even his incredible good looks. So sweet and loving with an attractive accent to boot. The tiniest things he did drove her crazy in the best ways! How he’d brush her quills back, cup her face with those gorgeous large hands and kiss her like she was the most precious thing in the world. Not gonna lie, she cried the first time she experienced it. It was just so wonderful and pure that she couldn’t help the few tears that slipped down her cheeks…How afterward he panicked and she just laughed; a sensation of euphoria as she never experienced before enraptured her entire being…

…was this what she had been missing out on the whole time?…

As happy as they were, it bothered her for a long time for Ash had done nothing worthy enough to gain Johnny’s love. He deserved to be cherished, wrapped up in a big fluffy blanket and shielded from the harsh, unforgiving world. This sweet, beautiful, soulful boy deserved everything that she never had… Including someone just as pure as he was; someone who didn’t waste most of her life on a selfish prick…but that didn’t seem to bother him at all.

Johnny held her so many times, told her just how much he cared about her regardless of her past. That it didn’t matter and he still wanted to be together. It took her such a long time to see her own worth after all the lies Lance had fed her for so long. That she deserved Johnny; he chose her - and Ash embraced it. More than ready to give herself completely to him; heart, soul, body - everything.

…that was much easier said than done…

It’d been almost an entire year since they started dating. A time it took him months before she got sick of waiting to make the first move; grabbed him by the lapels of his jacket and smushed her lips to his. The kiss was sloppy and awkward because he didn’t know what the hell he was doing, but damn, his mouth felt amazing… She found herself needing to be the instigator for any sort of physical contact; it was a long wait until he initiated any sort of physical activity between them but that was typically only hugs, holding hands, or the very rare kiss that never failed to take her breath away.

Sure, they’d cuddle all the time and even fall asleep wrapped in each other’s embrace but nothing more. The few times she was tempted to take it further, she’d kiss him firmly but he’d pull away and refused to go further. Even when her hands explored his chest and shoulder’s as much as she could, Johnny’s hands remained steadfast on her face, back, hips, or shoulders in absolute refusal to wander to more intimate parts -

…and damn, was it frustrating…

More sexually frustrating than anything, but frustrating nonetheless.

Unlike Lance, Johnny was almost painfully shy at times. His face growing all shades of red the few times she caught him without a shirt on or the few times he’d initiated a kiss that lead to a slight flick of tongue. Looked as if he committed an inexcusable crime the one time he accidentally grazed a hand across her ass. How it took her a full ten minutes to convince him that indeed, it was okay and she was perfectly fine with it (more than fine with it but he didn’t need to know that at the time)!

Johnny was so embarrassed that he was adamant to not do it again; dared not go too far when they kissed and politely brushed her hands away when hers would wander to caress a little too far down south. He was so awkward and shy; sweet and respectful but a part of her didn’t want that. She wanted him to take a little initiative; to kiss her neck or brush his large hand over something other than platonic areas; and not on accident!

…but of course, Ash didn’t want to push him.

Dared not force him into anything he didn’t want to do, but lately, it was hard not to notice him pulling away from a kiss faster. Instead of holding her at night, he’d turn his back toward her so she didn’t notice how his body was reacting to her kiss and intimate touch.

Ash swore he wanted it just as badly as she did.

Yet, knowing him as well as she did, he likely was ashamed of his teenage body’s normal hormonal activity; fearful that she’d be upset, crossing a boundary, or that he was disrespecting her somehow. It made her want to cry; to hold him, kiss him and tell him it was normal and that she desperately wanted him that way…sexually wanted to give herself to him because…

Oh God! She loved him so much…

It was so hard at first to admit. To come to terms with how much time and energy she’d wasted on Lance. Never truly knowing the meaning of love until she fell head over heels for Johnny. His love was so unconditional and encouraging; so perfect and pure that she could scarcely breathe at times. Gentleness and kindness nothing like she’d ever experienced before and she felt like such a fool defending her relationship with her asshole ex-boyfriend. Sometimes she treated it as if it was all a bad dream and if she could go back, she would have never agreed to go out with him in the first place.

Recalling as she told that to Johnny who just shrugged, smiled and said in that cute accented voice of his, “…but why? Perhaps if you didn’t, things may have changed to the point that we may have never met…”

Ash nearly cried after hearing him say that.

Johnny always said the right things at the right time. Speaking encouragement and loving her for her and nothing else. He didn’t care that she wasn’t a virgin, had way too much baggage that no one should be forced to carry, and was far too melodramatic and angsty for her own damn good.

Yet, Johnny didn’t care about that whatsoever.

Frankly, Ash didn’t deserve it; deserve him or his unconditional love…but he freely gave it to her anyway.

This was why she was so confused as to why he pulled away from her touch. Rare make-out sessions ending with him drawing away with a nervous stutter and excuse and she’d end up sleeping alone way too aroused to sleep peacefully. Not wanting to push the physical aspect but it was difficult to when she could tell how much he wanted it just as much as she did! Maybe even more!

Johnny didn’t think she’d notice, but oh yeah, she did.

Caught how his eyes flickered over her body when she wore her more revealing outfits or walked around in a tank top and short shorts during the intense summer months. Witnessed on more the one occasion, the tightening of his pants and the few times a slightly hard bulge rubbed over her calf when he was too enthralled with kissing her mouth. Hands shaking slightly as she could sense him wanting to push his boundaries but ultimately setting aside his own desires to be respectful.

Ash knew he could sense her own arousal and needs yet he continued to pull away and she just wasn’t sure what to do! His touch set her body on fire; craving his contact and urgently demanding more of him. Found herself wondering what sex with him would be like; if he would be as sweet, gentle, or awkward as if he was with everything else he did or if there was a more animalistic side to the sweet, lovable Johnny…

One she was desperate to see first-hand.

Suddenly tense and ridiculously turned on, Ash was on the verge of unbelievable frustration. Horny and desperate; ready to confront him about it but she didn’t want to frighten him either. A sigh escaped her lips as she realized there was little she could do but wait patiently for him to decide to push forward. To approach her or make it plain as day that he wanted to consummate their relationship. For him to finally make the move…

Yet, as patient as she was, Ash was uncertain if she could wait much longer…

A sudden knock on the door had her flinching; jumping up from her couch nervously. Cheeks flaring as she looked at the time on her wall; seen just how long she’d been staring at some fixed point and thinking about jumping in Johnny’s pants!

Ugh! How embarrassing!

“Ash?” Another slight knock and Johnny’s unsure voice came muffled from the other side of her door.

“Y-Yeah! Be right there!” she yelled; ignoring how her voice cracked as she adjusted her clothes for the umpteenth time before running to the door.

Opening it to reveal the object of her desires was jarring and amazing all at once.

There Johnny stood in all his tall glory; smiling, one hand casually in his pocket while the other giving her a gentle wave. The fresh scent and the barest hints of cologne on his fur and skin had her stomach churning uncomfortably in her gut. Palms slightly sweaty and mouth going dry at the sudden feelings that arose in her for taking him in; she was already aroused enough and him being so handsome wasn’t making this any easier.

Just what the hell had gotten into her tonight?

“Hey. Are you alright?” Johnny asked, tilting his head slightly when Ash still had yet to let him into the apartment.

“Yeah. Never better..” she muttered, smiling up at him like some lovesick puppy. It took her a whole 30 seconds to realize what she had been doing. “Whoops. Uh, s-sorry, Johnny. Come on in.” she continued with a slightly stutter; uncaring at this point how her cheeks burned. She flared her hand in welcome and he casually strolled in at her beckoning. Once the door was closed and locked behind her, she looked up at him and she swore her heart stopped dead in her chest.

“Thanks.” he said. The grin he bestowed had her internally moaning in pleasure. Sharp canines revealed as he gifted her with that fabulous smile. Without a single word uttered to give himself away, he lowered to his knees; one hand holding him steady on the floor as the other brushed a hand over the quills hanging in front of her ear. Caressing them gently aside so he could fully cup her face. Before she realized what happened, his brown eyes slipped closed and his mouth was on hers.

Ash’s icy blue eyes went to half-mast; staring at him for only a second before they slid shut and she instantly melted into it his kiss. Tilting her head slightly to get a better angle; deepening their lip-lock. Hand absentmindedly lifting up to grasp at his arm; leather soft and cool underneath her palm as her fingers coiled in the fabric. Toes curling in her boots as his mouth opened a bit further to deepen it further.

His kiss was gentle yet there was such a passion behind it; much like his endless reserves as he sang. Johnny gave every task 110% and the thought of taking this further had Ash subconsciously moaning into his mouth.

That must have startled Johnny, who repentantly pulled away from her mouth; their parting lips letting out a soft pop between them.

“Mmm…heh. What was that for?” she breathed over his lips; heart hammering against her rib-cage at the embarrassing moan she let slip. So distracting to experience the heat from his mouth so achingly close; desperate to close the distance and kiss him again.

“You’re just so beautiful, love,” he replied; removing his hand from her face to scratch at the short hair on his nape as he spoke, “I really just can’t help myself, I guess.” he continued rather nervously, accent thick and causing her fur to prickle pleasantly before he rose back up to his full height. Although he tried to hide it, Ash noticed the pink tint that flushed his cheeks and the tips of his round ears.

“You’re not so bad yourself.” she replied with a throaty chuckle; bottom lip anchored between her teeth. Heart palpitating painfully at his given nickname for her. It wasn’t new or anything, but it still caused her heart to warm every time she heard it. All of his affection wasn’t helping her out-of-control libido. “So um,” she cleared her throat, “I was thinkin’, you know, instead of spending all night in the kitchen like last time, why don’t we get some takeout instead?”

“Yea. Sure. Sounds great.” Johnny smiled with a heavy shrug as Ash prompted him to the few fliers from the restaurants around town that were scattered on her coffee table. Perhaps if she could distracted on something else, she could pull her mind out of the gutter before she said or did something really stupid.

“It’s your choice tonight, Big Guy.” Ash directed before plopping herself on the couch, patting the seat next to her while the gorilla happily accepted the invitation. Lowing himself to sit at her side, he began to look over the various menus and their unique selections. She watched mesmerized as his large hands moved over the papers; sometimes drumming against the grains of the wood as if he was at his piano. Oh, the things those hands could do…she froze and remembered that she was not going to be a creeper tonight. Forcefully pushing those thoughts away, her blue eyes flicking over to his face for a moment; languidly taking in his profile and how his lips pursed into an almost pout when he was trying to make a decision.

Why did he have to be so freakin’ cute?

“How about this one?” Johnny’s voice surprised her and her eyes gravitated to the menu he held out for her to see.

It was the restaurant they went to on their first date. Not sure exactly if he was just trying to be romantic or what because the food there was terrible. She was sorely tempted to laugh but stopped when she caught the glint in his eye. Ash swore time froze. His warm brown eyes were scanning slowly over her face, the most genuine smile pulling at his lips. No one had ever looked at her that way before and dammit, this was not helping her state…

“Johnny?” she breathed. “Y-Ya uh, really wanna order from there?” she asked, unsure, not exactly sure why he seemed different tonight or if it was her hormones acting up.

“Admittedly, it’s not very tasty, but it brings back good memories, doesn’t it?” he replied; his arm suddenly wrapped around her waist and he brushed his forehead over her temple.

“Heh… Y-Yea…” she sighed, cheeks on fire and heart was pounding so hard that he could probably hear it. Almost afraid to look up, she did; staring into his face and him smiling so assuredly; white teeth proudly displayed, and dammit, did he even care what he was doing to her?! Her body was already betraying her and there was only one she knew for sure - if he kept this up, it was gonna be a long night…


the lizzie bennet diaries meme:

ten episodes; the lizzie trap
“So, is it just me, or does social strangeness run in the Darcy family? I mean, in very different ways, of course. But seriously, what was up with her?! I’m really not sure what else I can say about her right now, but she did just give me permission. Given what just happened and how weird that was, I better be on my toes for whatever that girl does next.”


the lizzie bennet diaries meme:

ten episodes; gratitude
“God, for two such smart people, we can certainly act like idiots, can’t we?”
“One might even say it’s our forte.”
“Well, let me make things as clear as possible: William Darcy, I don’t want to be just friends and I don’t want to be with you because I’m grateful. I want to be with you because of you. Got it?”
“Clear as day, Lizzie Bennet.”

anonymous asked:

I'd like to thank you, from the bottom of my heart. You, blanket, lilmiko, and many more who kept ss alive, and never failed them the way its creator did a thousand times over. Thank you thank you thank you. I can't tell you how much it means to me and many others, and I hope you're always well and happy.

thank you!  that’s very kind of you. there are definitely so many other artists, writers, and members of the fandom that keep the otp alive and illuminate the good parts that might are easy to lose among the trash. 

again, thank you for your sentiments, but mostly thank you for reading. personally, i don’t think i’d still be doing this today if it wasn’t for you and everyone else that bothers with me. it’s every hilarious comment that makes me smile and want to continue. so thank you too! :)


the lizzie bennet diaries meme:

ten episodes; hyper-mediation in new media
“Okay, with the benefit of hindsight, there is clearly something missing from my last video: me asking Bing why the hell he let himself get talked into dumping my sister! The perfect opportunity was right there, and I just let it fly on by. All I had to do was say, ‘Bing, why do you let your sister and your best friend run your love life?’ Or, ‘Bing, are you aware that your sister and your best friend run your love life?’ Or maybe, uh, ‘Bing, are you aware to the extent which your sister and your best friend run your love life, and maybe the rest of your life, I’m not sure.’ That’s the problem with being here and not home. For the last year, whenever I’ve had something to work out, I’ve done it on the videos. Nothing like a little costume theater to focus the mind. But costume theater requires someone to do costume theater with, and since neither my sisters nor Charlotte are here, my options are kind of limited. What am I supposed to do, roam the halls looking for someone to put in my videos?”


That’s what people do when they’re in love. Don’t you know anything?