otp: cradle robber

Alison's Journal Entries:

Practically Sisters: “Little miss prissy pants has a secret that she doesn’t know. How good is this one! I’ve got four terrified people in my hand on this one.” [Jason & Spencer are half siblings]

Cradle Robber: “…little chat but right now my cradle robbing friend is going to get a lot of guilt from me. I still haven’t decided if I’m going to tell our mutual friend about CR’s lip lock, Lord knows if I do she’ll just fall into a depression and put Hostess out of the twinkie and cupcake business. But this is so juicy and I love to make her squirm. It’s good for her. She needs to break out of her shell, get angry…" [Hanna and Mike hooked up]

Hot for Teacher: ”I saw a teacher interviewing today with the principal. He was quite sexy. High school boys are gross, college guys are only looking for one thing, but older men, now they know what they want and take it all. He looks kind of bookish but in a cute way. I will get to know him eventually and to have a teacher on my side…“ [Alison liked Ezra? Maybe Byron? Do we know any other teachers that matter?] 

Football (Fail?): "Pigskin has been __ again. She frightened me a little and I don’t frighten easy. She’s out of her ___. She’s kind of a ___ girl. She might as well be a ___. She might just ___. Physically she ___ ox and there’s ___ I can compete ___ from a physical ___ but I can still ___ her. I have a gift I was given this ___.” [Talking about Paige- sorry it’s so choppy, part of the page was covered. You can fill in the blanks of how Paige is strong and built, and Ali can’t match that.]

Suzy Clueless: “All my friends think they can keep their secrets from me, oh how sweet and 100% wrong. I know secrets about them that they don’t even know. This sleepy little town may think they’re the American Dream ___ that, but there are more skeletons here than in a cemetery on the ___. I would never rat on my friends, other people may not be as safe. But I will never betray my friends, unless they give me reason to. For example, there’s my blue haired emo princess. Suzy Clueless. Now Suzy herself doesn’t have any naughty secrets, in fact she is little miss (perfect?) as far as I can see. But her daddy, not so much… girl, a big house ___ picket fence, the whole nine. Suzy was with me when I saw the smooch between Mr. Clueless and his blonde little treat. Of course Suzy was so wrapped up in her little world of boys and hair dye that she did not even see her papa’s car let alone the kiss. I need to find out more about this girl. Despite her freakish blue hair dye, I’ve always admired Suzy Clueless for her great sense of style. And I do genuinely like ___ but she should know…” [Aria’s Dad’s affair with Meredith]

Girl Crush: “So Girl Crush kissed me today. To be fair, I kissed her back and it was ___ but I definitely don’t have feelings for her in the way she has for me ___… How no one else has noticed this besides me is mind blowing. I might be more attentive to these sort of things than most people, but GC is so obvious about it that her eyes might as well be permanently glued to me. Funny thing is, if I hadn’t let her kiss me, she may have never admitted, even to herself, what she really is. I better make sure she doesn’t think what…” [Emily being a lesbian and kissing Ali]

The Busy Bee: “I used to go there when I was little. Back then the bumblebee was bright. Neon yellow, little fellow now he’s lost his light. The darkest night and brightest day draw the shades it’s all the same. Two small dressers, full of treasures I think here I could stay. Broke the latch and left it hanging, don’t think the keep will mind, no one there, to make repairs, the perfect place to hide. [Old Busy Bee Inn]

Untitled: "Why does someone like her have to exist? Following me and my friends around like a puppy with no home. Well maybe if I beat her down enough she’ll go crazy, do something stupid and they will lock her up somewhere so I don’t have to stare at her stupid (face?) anymore. She makes me want to VOMIT (and I don’t mean figuratively) I mean physically she makes me SICK.” [Stalker Mona]

youtube

Revocation’s David Davidson showing you how to play Cradle Robber

Dear god… I just my face just melted off…

youtube

Cradle Robber - Revocation

Omegle Project #7
  • Stranger: hey
  • Stranger: asl?
  • You: hey
  • You: 19/f/nyc
  • Stranger: nice
  • Stranger: 15 m philly
  • Stranger: so to young?
  • You: never, baby
  • Stranger: ooo :)
  • Stranger: lol
  • You: i've been robbing the cradle for years now.
  • Stranger: lol
  • Stranger: niceee
  • You: i mean, i'm sure my neighbors dont miss their infant too much
  • Stranger: haha
  • You: he's in my basement. he cries a lot though
  • You: sometimes shaking him helps
  • Your conversational partner has disconnected.