other video games

More humans being humans

Ok, guys, don’t know if this has been done before either, but I’ve had my second (2nd) idea about humans being weird.

Handedness.

Just, what the fuck, right?

There are some things I personally can do decently with both hands.  I’m an excellent typist, for instance, and I don’t think either of my hands are more proficient at it than the other.  Video game controllers.  Occasionally, there are things I can do just left-handed.

But in general, it’s insane that the mirror image of my right hand can’t do shit.

I wouldn’t go so far as to say my writing is legible with my right hand, but I can read it, and I can write small and quickly.  My left hand goes slow and makes a disaster on the paper.  Throwing, using a paintball gun, everything feels super awkward trying to do it left-handed to the point that I don’t even try.

So the aliens meet us.  It’s pretty cool (except for when our space lawyers ruin everything; see my other post).  And hey, these humans can be pretty useful and intelligent, let’s do some joint ventures as shows of good faith and getting to know each other.

We’re on the aliens’ ship.  Every time we’re carrying something and come up to that one door, we grumble to ourselves as we either awkwardly change hands or attempt to reach across to hit the button to open the door.  Humans always sit on the one side of the table, and if they don’t, they’re either elbowing their alien buddy or sending food all over the place.  So, the aliens naturally assume humans just evolved to use that hand for everything for some reason, even though that makes no sense, they look identical?

And then the lefties show up.  Doing everything mirrored.  The aliens had thoughtfully made some conversion kits to help the humans out, but now these ones need the mirror image or else their productivity is just shot.  But then there’s Susan, and she can use whatever hand she wants for everything?  Why aren’t all the humans like Susan? Or at least using the same hand?  How do we explain that to them?

“Oh, yeah, when we’re born, we’re basically programmed to probably use only one hand, picked mostly at random but favouring the right side.  Yeah, I don’t think about it much. Hey, can I take that chair, I don’t want to knock over your plate while we eat.”

The post about Dream Daddy’s announcement got more attention on tumblr in less than 24 hours (100k notes) than any other post about ANY video game announced/shown at E3 2017

In other words, a gay dad dating sim created by a bunch of YouTube comedians who play Mario and make dick jokes for a living got more attention and hype than games with 4-fuckass-K HD graphics or some shit, and giant budgets, owned/created by huge companies who overall take themselves extremely seriously

8

Take up a false identity and immerse yourself into the Bloodborne academia experience. But…try to get along.

tumblr: plays video games with graphic violence and murder

tumblr: this fic you wrote is going to make people do bad things

Game On!

[Astrology Edition]

Aries: Outlast- this is some SCARY VIOLENT BLOODY shit that requires serious balls to play. It is a hell of an adrenaline rush, and requires you to conquer your fears to make it through. 

Taurus: Skyrim- a game that lets you hoard shit, has lots of pretty nature, so you can chill and wander aimlessly. 

Gemini: Infamous: Second Son- fun, bright, colorful shit with a playful protagonist and unique premise. You’ll fucking love it. 

Cancer: Firewatch- Emotional, deep, but calming and mysterious. It’s an instant classic indie game that makes you feel nostalgic and lonely in the best possible way.

Leo: Mass Effect- It’s all about you, and you’re Shepard, hero of the galaxy. This series is dramatic, allows the player to self-insert, and allows you to romance all kinds of sexy aliens. 

Virgo: Heavy Rain- This is a game designed for those who pay attention to details and are keen on doing the right thing. It is some nerve-wracking shit, but well-suited for analytical types.

Libra: Life is strange- Decisions, decisions. They’re the bane of a libra’s existence, and the central focus of this game. You can change your mind as much as you want, but you’ll have regrets no matter what. 

Scorpio: Until dawn- Horror, the supernatural, and some seriously twisted psychological shit. It’s dark, suspenseful, and has layers and layers of weird clues to connect.

Sagittarius: Uncharted 4- Fun, adventure, and the quest for the ultimate treasure. Combine that with a good-humored protagonist with preternatural good luck, along with a penchant for philosophy, and you have the game-version of Sagittarius. 

Capricorn: The Evil Within- This game is dark, serious, gory, extremely, plot-heavy; but not very emotional. It is also not fun, which is good, because caps don’t want fun; they want a challenge.

Aquarius:The Stanley Parable- An indie game whose sole purpose is to criticize the narrative style of every other game out there. Nuff said. 

Pisces: Beyond: Two Souls- This is a game about sacrifice, about a girl who was a victim and an outcast, but retained her sense of empathy and compassion through it all. Lots of pretty graphics and emotions. You’ll love it. 

** Certain video games give off a vibe similar to the energy of certain signs, but you can take this as a rec list; check moon for what you’ll enjoy and mars for what you’ll probably be good at.