Dear Diary,

This is the Caller, as she is called. It’s not much of a badass name to go by, if you ask me. It certainly doesn’t maker her sound dangerous.

Anyway, she is the one who ended up having the books I need. She, very weirdly, had them each lovingly placed on a podium in a room at the top of the fort. I was able to try bartering with her for the books. Here’s how our conversation went.

Me: So, Caller Lady, how about you give me those books? I’m sure that I need them more than you.

Caller Lady: What makes you think that?

Me: It’s for a project I’m working on in school, and I really want to get a good grade. Not because we have something that could be extremely powerful that we know nothing about and need information about it–information that might be in these books. It’s just for a good grade. Honestly.

Caller Lady: You just came into my home, killed my people, destroyed all my experiments, and you want me to just hand over these books? To you?

Me: Is that not what I just said? Did I stutter?

Caller Lady: There’s only one way that I’ll let you leave here alive with these books. Give me Orthorn.

Me: You want the turtle guy? You’re attracted to turtles? That’s kind of weird, but just giving him to you would make me a horrible person. But I really need those books…all right, take the turtle guy.

Then I went to pick up the books, and the crazy caller lady attacked me anyway. You can’t trust people who are physically attracted to turtles. They lie.

Marcurio and I killed the caller lady and we got the books. Orthorn made his way out of the fort and he said that he wouldn’t return to the college because he’s a cowardly turtle and can’t deal with the confrontation.

So now Marc and I are back on the road. Someone better teach me something useful for this.