Because “Penguins are the Pinnacle of Dinosaur Evolution” (Thomas Holtz)
Just a head? Why just a head?! You literally took the generic bird emoji and colored it differently. Can’t even tell what kind of penguin it’s supposed to be. They were probably going for King but it’s too ambiguous for my tastes. And that beak is too short for a king! There are short peaked penguins out there that they could have overlayed on the generic bird emoji, this is like they weren’t even trying. 4/10
The Little Penguin! A good boy, a fine boy, a happy boy! They picked a happy chub. 100/10
Okay, I can definitely tell that that’s supposed to be a King, so an improvement on Apple. But it’s so… blocky? Penguins are smooth, man. Streamlined. For ocean movement. You dig? 5/10
A smol friend! There aren’t a whole hecka lot of penguins that are grey as adults but this could be the White-Flippered Penguin, a close relative of the Little Blue. Props for picking a not very well known penguin! It doesn’t have an orange beak though. Gotta take off points for that. Could be a Yellow-Eye, but their feathers aren’t that grey, and their beaks are pink, not orange. 6/10
Generic Penguin. Could be anything. They are a mystery. How can we know they deserve our trust? Why is their top beak so much longer than the bottom? 2/10
WHY IS THEIR SMILE GOING OUTSIDE OF THE BEAK AREA DO THEY KNOW HOW BIRD MOUTHS WORK -100/10
Generic Penguin, but Friendlier. Can’t really see the sides of it’s head for proper IDing, but it has orange feet and an orange bill. Might be a Gentoo except it’s head is too white in the wrong place? 3/10
These are the mysteries. No orange patches to indicate it’s an Emperor or a King; orange feet but no white patch on the head to make it a Gentoo; no weird cranial ornamentation for the bulk of orange footed penguins. Who is she? What penguins have yellow beaks? 1/10
ITS EYES, THEY HAVE NO PUPILS. HOW DOES PENGUIN SEE. -17.8/10
Another White-Flippered Penguin with… a chinstrap? Come on, guys. You’re not even really trying. I don’t. These don’t match any penguins. 1/10
I do enjoy the nose detail, I do, but once again you see you have ORANGE FEET and an orange beak and NO CRANIAL ORNAMENTATION so we don’t KNOW WHO YOU ARE. People just don’t know any penguins anymore. 3/10
Holy crap. Make that beak longer and it’s an actual Emperor. We finally got there, people. 10/10
“When Hastings and myself, we first came to the Grand Metropolitan Hotel, there was a man at the desk. He was elderly. He must walk with a stick. But when he goes to his room, which is on the first floor, he proceeds not to the lift that is waiting, no, but to the staircase. It was a performance, Monsieur, but a performance that, to Poirot, did not ring true.”
2. Foyles⇢ it’s huge, beautifully organized, and has everything you could need. Also great cafe upstairs.
3. Persephone Books⇢ all lady authors, a great way to find new things.
4. Southbank Book Market⇢ in between waterloo and the eye (east edge of the southbank center under the bridge). Interesting selection (heavy on old orange penguin classics) with a can’t beat view.
5. Charring Cross Road⇢ there’s a string of independent, rare, and 2nd hand bookstore here (same road Foyles is on). Start down by Great Newport Street, head up towards Foyles. There’s a whole range of bookstores down there – I particularly like Koenig (emphasis on art and fashion). Don’t be intimidated by the antique booksellers; no, you probably can’t afford anything but as long as you’re quiet and careful they don’t mind you poking around.