• Aries: Shout out to the people that don’t know what the opposite of in is!
  • Taurus: I had a crazy dream last night. I was swimming in an ocean of orange soda. Turns out it was just a Fanta sea...
  • Gemini: My sister bet that I couldn’t build a car out of spaghetti. You should’ve seen her face when I drove pasta..
  • Cancer: I used to hate maths but then I realized decimals have a point.
  • Leo: I’m close friends with 25 letters of the alphabet, I don’t know y...
  • Virgo: I don’t trust stairs because they’re always up to something...
  • Libra: What kind of concert only costs 45 cents? A 50 Cent concert featuring Nickelback.
  • Scorpio: Had an argument with my friend 5 years after i super glued his phone to his hand, he just couldn’t let it go...
  • Sagittarius: I want to be cremated as it is my last hope for a smoking hot body.
  • Capricorn: What do you do when you are cold? Stay in the corner, it’s about 90 degrees there.
  • Aquarius: Did you hear about the restaurant on the moon? I heard the food was good, but it had no atmosphere.
  • Pisces: Rick Astley will let you borrow any of his Pixar collection DVDs but he will never give you Up.
  • -
“My life consists out of bad puns and candy.”

w.A/N: So i thought I take part in the Gabriel-Monthly Challenged to push myself a bit and here we go. Have fun reading and all.;)

Summary: You come of from a research but your day didnt went that well. In the living room you find your boyfriend going through some Sciene-Fiction Magazine and you realize that once again he’s pull pranks on people.

Warnings: Bad Puns (very bad ones), smut, Gabriel being a the idiot he is.

Pairing: Gabriel x Reader

Word Count: 2414

Keep reading

The signs as Dad Jokes

Aries: A tomato walks into class late, and tells the teacher “Don’t worry, I’ll catch up.”

Taurus: A panda walks into a bar and says “I’ll have a scotch and……….a coke please.” The bartender replies “Alright, but why the big pause?” The panda holds up his hands and says “I was born with them.”

Gemini: How much does a hipster weigh? An Instagram.

Cancer: I’m terrified of elevators. I think I’ll start taking steps to avoid them.

Leo: Just watched a documentary about beavers- it was the best damn program I’ve ever seen!

Virgo: I went to the zoo the other day, there was only one dog in it. It was a shitzu.

Libra: Why does a chicken coop have two doors? Because if it had four doors, it’d be a chicken sedan.

Scorpio: What do you call a fly with no wings? A walk.

Capricorn: What’s the advantages of living in Switzerland? Well, the flag is a big plus.

Sagittarius: What does 0 say to 8? “Nice belt.”

Aquarius: “I shouldn’t have eaten that sea food. I’m feeling a bit… Eel.”

Pisces: I dreamed I was drowning in an ocean of orange soda last night. It was pretty surreal, it took me awhile to realize it was just a Fanta sea.

anonymous asked:

exo reaction when they see u in a bikini

Let’s go~

Y/N: -How am I looking?
Xiumin: Very gooood, jagiya


Whoaaa, She looks so good *o*


-Baobei, You look better than me… *bows* 


-Awww, Annyeong my Sweetie <333


-Baobei, it’s you?!
Heeey, people, Is it my baobei? 


*He can’t resist their pervy thoughts*


-Oh Yea, We’re going on the beach 


-I’ve fallen in love…. again


-Aren’t you going to go in this to the beach?!
*Hell, I hope no. There are too much bad guys… I’ll have to kill them all…*


-Is this the real life is this just fanta sea?


-Aigooo, uri jagiya looks so pretty today *fangirling XD*

Y/N- How am I looking?
Sehun- Good.
Y/N-Only good?

Sehun- Ne
Y/N: Sehunaaaa~ 
Sehun- Okay, a little bit better than good