or the bacon you made me

#BendyHTtakeover Recap

((so I’m gonna compile all the Good Shit from the #BendyHTtakeover event into one post okay here we goooo))

  • Sammy has been writing music for most of his life, “from a young age […] tunes would pop into my head, [writing music] was the only logical step. ;)”
  • Willow Weep For Me” is Sammy’s favorite song, he apparently considers it modern. what time period does this game take place in jfc
  • Sammy made a handful of puns during the event. Puns are great.
  • Apparently he liked Bacon Soup at one time, but “it kind of lost its luster after a bit.. But you’d have to be crazy to not love chocolate cake!”
  • Putting on pants is apparently a struggle for him.
  • Someone asked if Norman was behind the organ from chapter 2. He responded with “The organ… I don’t know what you mean. Although Norman, our projectionist, he was always very bright..” which might be a hint to something, a compliment, or another pun - who knows.
  • An ad for a Little Mermaid bedspread got posted in the middle of the event, probably on accident. Someone joked “Sammy’s favorite Disney Princess is Ariel, confirmed.” All he had to say was something was amiss with the post, and the bed looked comfortable.
  • Sammy still writes and sings music when he’s not praising Bendy, and has written “so many dozens of songs! So many! When you’ve been in this business as long as I have… you’re quite busy.” He also said “Perhaps you shall hear them someday.” pls
  • His clearest memory of the studio besides the ink pump is “a whistling sound, a vague melody.. with a sinister purpose.”
  • When asked for advice on composing music, he responded “Music is all about layers. Rich and lush. Practice, my friend. That’s what it’s all about!”
  • Wally’s catchphrase is apparently contagious. Someone asked “Sammy, what would happen if Wally lost his keys again?” To which he responded, “That Wally! That man can’t ever keep his things in order! If I didn’t know better I’d say his mind was wayyyyy out of here!”
  • Headcanon confirmed, “Sheep Songs” is Sammy’s favorite song he wrote for the Bendy cartoons.
  • He wears the mask to “resemble the most perfect form I know!”.
  • He might not be able to see without the mask as well, someone later asked “how do you see with that mask?” and he replied “how do you see without yours?”. Might have just been a joke, or confirming the “ink monsters can see through Bendy’s eyes in cutouts and posters” theory.
  • Sammy thinks Susie is “A charming woman.. quite… charming.. I recall only her face… that.. smile.”
  • He took some selfies for us.
  • Someone asked how he felt after what happened to him at the end of chapter 2. “I can’t recall any injustice on the part of the Ink Demon. He is.. most fair.” Apparently he’s fine with being pancake’d.
  • “Who’s better? Bendy, Alice, or Boris?” “There is only our lord Bendy.”
  • What makes Bendy so worshipable is that “[He] knows all and sees all. He is the hope we’ve been waiting for!”
  • “The last I can recall… I had a flowing cascade of brown hair.. I miss it so… or was it blonde? No matter.. it was splendid.”
  • He regrets never going to Coney Island.
  • Someone asked what he thinks of Alice “Ohhh such a voice! So.. heavenly! So beautiful!” Tied with his earlier comment about Susie, this makes Samsie shippers such as myself rejoice.
  • He is honored that people write songs about him, and Bendy.
  • He doesn’t only make puns, he memes. According to him, “if you have the proper training, mayonnaise IS an instrument.”
  • His favorite instrument is the banjo, he was always fond of it and it “plucks the right chord with me”
  • He thinks bacon soup can be good, “it’s best when aged for a while I hear.”
  • He’s happy Joey let him name the song “Sammy Jam” after himself.
  • Someone asked if he had a special someone before becoming an ink monster. His answer was a flustered “Someone.. special? … I.. well.. there was.. this one. I almost remember.”
  • He doesn’t quite know where Joey is, but he thinks he’s off raising his salary somewhere.
  • He doodles Bendy sometimes.
His || Jungkook || 0.18

Member: Jungkook x Reader

Type: Angst, Fluff, Smut.

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My grandma lived under the house

by reddit user chewingskin

Before you read these moments from my life, I’d like to apologize for the language, but I’m trying to recall it from the exact detail.

During the months of June, July, and August, I spent many hot summers of my childhood at my Grandmother’s house further west on the island of Cape Breton. The forest was plentiful, the plains were a vibrant green, and my Grandmother’s house was a rickety old two-story that was built sometime in the 50’s and looked like it didn’t belong.

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tera2  asked:

Hi; I really like your blog! The #AskDrarry are so funny, and well thought out! Question: After you first kiss, followed immediately bye you first time together, how awkward was “The Morning After”?

(Thank you very much! :D)

Harry: It was surprisingly non-awkward. 

Draco: I mean, for you. ‘cause it was your flat. You didn’t have to dread doing the walk of shame.

Harry: Walk of– You were ashamed of having slept with me?!

Draco: *eye-roll* No, that’s not what I– It’s just what it’s called, love, and I was joking!

Harry: *grumbling* I made you breakfast.

Draco: He did. I woke up alone in his bed and was seconds away from Disapparating home straight from there when I heard…singing– really, really horrible singing.

Harry: *grins* And you smelt the bacon.

Draco: Fine, yes, I smelt the bacon. And so I make my way over to the kitchen and I find him there, in nothing but his jeans, doing this clumsy little dance and braying along to the Wireless, frying up eggs. 

Harry: I turn around and see him just standing there, staring.

Draco: Because, god, you were adorable and I was more or less already head over heels and literally didn’t know what to say!

Harry: And he stood there in his rumpled clothes, shirttails hanging out– fuck, his hair was this gorgeous mess, he was covered in hickeys– *dodges elbow-jab* –and he absolutely took my breath away. So I kissed him.

Draco: Thus effectively making my decision for me regarding whether to stay or not. Plus there was coffee.

Harry: And we actually talked all through breakfast - talked. No bickering, no snark–

Draco: Well, there was some snark, what do you take me for?

Harry: Then I took him straight back to bed.

Draco: …And we pretty much stayed there until the next morning.

The Girl from Around the Block-Lip Gallagher Imagine

Requested: No

Warnings: some sensuality and language (Shameless imagine, don’t be surprised)

Originally posted by adventuresofjulia

  Lip didn’t have many strictly platonic friendships with other girls. In fact, he never considered he was capable of having a relationship with a female that didn’t involve them screwing into oblivion. But Y/N Y/L/N was different. For one thing, they’ve known each other since they were two years old, when Fiona and Hailey, Y/N’s older sister, arranged a play date for the two of them. They bonded over a love of Legos and had been friends ever since. He helped her with homework and she helped him get out of trouble when trying to persuade him from getting into it failed. He taught her how to smoke and she taught him how to play the piano. They were perfect for each other but neither of them would admit it.

  “Come on, Lip, you’re telling me that you’ve never thought of asking Y/N out?” Ian asked.

  They were smoking on their porch in the hot Chicago summer. Ian had the day off from work and Lip was still thinking up his latest scheme to make money fast.

   “Y/N’s like a sister to me, you know. You don’t f—k your sister,” Lip said. “We aren’t royalty or anything.”

   Ian laughed. “Well, I’m pretty sure Y/N’s thought of f—cking you, you can see it in her eyes.”

   “Shut up.” Lip smacked Ian in the chest, making the ginger laugh.

   “Oh, that hurt so bad. Can’t you hit harder, pussy?”

   And that led to them wrestling jokingly, making Debbie roll her eyes inside and Carl begin cheering them on. Once they stopped (ie: when Ian pinned Lip down in their front yard), Lip sighed.

   “For the record, I let you win.”

   “Yeah, whatever.” Ian’s smile disappeared and he looked serious. “So, you’d really never consider getting with Y/N?”

   Lip rolled his eyes and shoved Ian off of him. “If you’re so into her, why don’t you date her?”
  “Because I’m gay.”

   “Oh yeah, use that excuse.” Lip took another long drag of his cigarette as he stood. “Look, Y/N’s a cool girl and stuff but I can’t see us being serious. I mean, we used to take baths together and I had the pleasure of being the only person with her when she first got her period. There’s too much history.”

   As the words left his mouth, Lip knew he was lying to himself. He knew that he was madly in love with his best friend who somehow managed to be sweet but scrappy when it came to defending herself or any of the Gallaghers. Plus, there was the way she threw her head back when she laughed really hard, making her gorgeous y/h/c locks flow around her. Then, there was the way she’d scrunch up her nose whenever she was confused about a homework question. Plus, she was the one who first confronted him about Karen, telling him that he shouldn’t take her kind of bullsh-t anymore. Also, her y/e/c eyes would light up whenever she was staring out at Lake Michigan and she would jump whenever someone/something freaked her out.

   Ian glanced behind Lip. “Too much history, huh?”

   “Yep.”

   “Then you wouldn’t be too upset at the view behind you right now.”

   Lip turned around and what he saw nearly made him drop his cigarette. Across the street, standing on the corner, was none other than Y/N smiling widely as she kissed Will Brooks. 

    “What’s she doing with him?” Lip asked.

    “Well, Lip, it appears as though they’re making out. It probably has to do with the fact that she’s had a crush on him since second semester,” Ian said.

   “How the f–k do you know all that?”

   “Because I’m the gay friend she tells all this to,” Ian said. “And I can’t blame her. Will is the star of the basketball team, has muscles for days, and is the literal definition of tall, dark, and handsome.”

   “He’s an idiot. He thought that a square should count as a rhombus in geometry,” Lip muttered.

   “Someone sounds jealous,” Ian sang.

   “Shut up,” he hissed.

   But the green monster was making his blood boil as he watched Y/N laugh at something Will said before hitting his arm playfully. Her smile was beautiful and genuine, if only she was smiling that way for Lip. She kissed Will one last time before circling around him and heading down the street. However, Will didn’t let her get by before swatting her butt and making her jump. Lip could’ve strangled him right then and there.

   “Lip, Ian, you are not going to believe what just happened!” Y/N said when she got up to them.

   “You got syphilis from that idiot?” Lip asked.

   Y/N frowned. “No, but Will did just take me out.”

   “Where?” Ian smiled widely and crossed his arms just to spite Lip.

   “He took me to lunch and then we walked along Navy Pier, just talking. Your advice worked, Ian!” Y/N squealed as she hugged him.

    “Wait, you gave her advice on this?” Lip asked.

    “It’s what the gay best friend does,” Ian said.

    Y/N turned to Lip and frowned. “Why are you getting so upset about this?”

    “Because you didn’t tell me about it.”

    “I didn’t think you’d care if I went out with Will. It’s nothing serious.”

    “But it might be. The Bulls are looking at Will to draft him. I hear he’s going to be Chicago’s Kobe Bryant.”

    “This is the Bulls were talking about, Ian,” Lip said. “Besides, Will get a new girl every week, you should probably just forget about him.”

   “For your information, Mr. Negative, we’re actually going out again tomorrow night. He got us Bulls tickets!”
   “Nosebleeds?” Lip asked.

   “Nope, near the floor, center court!” Y/N grinned. “I can’t believe this is happening. I never thought that Will would ever notice me.”

    “How could he not? You’re gorgeous,” Ian said.

    “Just be careful, okay. I don’t like the guy.”

    “You don’t like many guys, Lip. Besides, you should be happy for me. Who knows? Maybe one day I’ll get you court-side seats to see the Bulls.”

   “No thanks, I’m good.” Lip threw his cigarette down and snuffed it out with his boot. “I’m gonna go take care of some business.”

    “What business?” Y/N asked as she began following him down the sidewalk.

    “My usual business with Kev,” Lip said.

    Y/N’s eyes widened. “Lip, you can’t do that. You’re already high up on the cop’s radar, right behind Carl.”

   “I’ve been doing this since we were fourteen, Y/N, I know what I’m doing.”

    “But you getting arrested could f—k up your chances with MIT or U of Chicago or any other fancy school,” Y/N argued.

   “Hey, why don’t you worry about what dress you’re gonna wear to see Will again and I’ll worry about my future, alright?” Lip snapped.

   Y/N flinched at his words. They had had arguments before, but he never got this mean with her. “What’s your problem, Lip? Are you on the rag?”

   “No, just leave me alone.”

   “Fine, come around the block when you decide to stop being such a jackass,” Y/N said.

   Though her words were sharp, she sounded hurt and it hurt Lip that he had hurt his best friend. As much as he wanted to admit why he was really angry with Y/N, he was too prideful and scared of her reaction to say anything.

   For two weeks, Y/N didn’t come by to see the Gallaghers nor did Lip try to go up around the block to see her. Fiona, Ian, Debbie, Carl, Kev, and V did their best not to mention her name whenever Lip was around. But ever since their fight, Lip had begun drinking and smoking more. He was miserable. However, everything came to a head when Fiona confronted him one day.

   “Alright, Lip, go talk to her,” Fiona said.

   “What?” 

   Lip was sitting in the kitchen, drinking coffee while Fiona and Debbie were making breakfast.

   “You heard her, we’re sick of seeing you moping around all the time and drunk you is only so entertaining,” Debbie said.

   “I don’t want to talk to her. Besides, the only person she’s interested in talking to is Will.” Lip spat out the boy’s name.

   “That’s not true,” Ian said as he walked into the kitchen with Liam in his arms, “she talks to me all the time.”

   “If I want to talk to her, I’ll talk to her, alright? Can we stop f—king talking about her?” Lip snapped.

   Fiona set a plate of eggs and bacon in front of Lip and bent down to his level. “Lip, I know you’ve been in love with Y/N pretty much since the day you met and it must be killing you that you fought and that she’s with Will—”

   “Will Brooks? He’s a babe,” Debbie said.

   Fiona, Ian, and Lip collectively shot her a look that made her instantly regret her words.

   “Sorry.”

   Fiona sighed. “But you need to man up and talk to her. I know this is gonna be hard comin’ from me but I know love when I see it.”

   Lip groaned. “She’s not gonna forgive me.”

  “She will, we’ve all had to,” Ian said.

  Lip playfully shoved him before taking a long swig of coffee. “I’ll be right back.”

  “That’s my boy,” V said as she entered the kitchen from the rear entrance.

   “Did you hear all of that?” Ian asked.

   “For the most part. Please go talk to that girl, I’m sick of seeing you look more pissed off than usual.”

   Lip laughed. “I will, see ya, V.”

   As he left the house, Lip began going over everything he could possibly say to make everything up to Y/N. 

   “Hey, Y/N, I’m sorry for being a dick and getting pissed about you and Will. I’m sure the NBA accepts idiots too—no, can’t say that, she’ll get pissed that I insulted him. Y/N, I’m sorry for being a dick and I’m really happy for you and Will. Maybe the Bulls will start winning if he joins. Yeah, that’s better.” Lip paused. “Y/N, you probably hate me, but we have to talk…”

   “I thought that only crazy people talked to themselves,” Mandy said as she strolled up to Lip.

   “Oh, hey, Mandy,” he said.

    She was wearing a tight black tank top and short denim cut offs. They had a short-lived fling but decided that they were better off as friends. Besides Ian and Lip, Mandy was Y/N’s closest friend.

   “I’m guessing that you’re off to talk to Y/N,” Mandy said.

   “Yeah, I said some real sh-tty stuff to her and she didn’t deserve it.” 

   “She never does,” Mandy said. “It’s just too bad about her and Will.”

   Lip frowned. “What happened?”

   “You didn’t hear? She found out that he’s been cheating on her ever since they got together. I offered to have my brothers beat him up for her, but she said it wasn’t worth it. I haven’t seen her around in a long time.”

   “Sh-t.”

    “Yeah, so whatever you have to say to her, don’t f-ck up.”

   “Thanks, Mandy.”

    As Lip walked away from Mandy, he was both elated and furious. He could beat Will’s face in for what he did to Y/N but at the same time, he was ecstatic that she was single again. Now he really had to perfect what he was gonna say.

   “Y/N, I’m sorry about what happened between us. You didn’t deserve it and I was just being a dick. I’m also sorry about what happened between you and Will. He deserves to get the sh-t beat out of him.” Lip sighed. “And…and I got so mad about the whole Will thing because, you’re like a sister to me and I didn’t want to lose my sister or my friend…the friend I’ve been in love with since we were two.”

   At this point, Lip was standing in front of the Y/L/N’s house. Mr. Y/L/N was most likely back at work in the loan office and Mrs. Y/L/N was off being a maid in the W Hotel. Whether or not Hailey was home was a bit of a toss up since she would skip class more than Lip did. The navy, two-story house seemed a lot bigger than it usually did and part of Lip wanted to turn around and run away.

   “Don’t be a pussy,” he muttered. 

   He walked up the front steps and knocked on the door.

   Seconds later, a dog was barking and Hailey was yelling at it.

   “Geez!” she blew a piece of dark hair out of her eyes and narrowed them once she saw Lip. “Lip.”

   “Hi, Hailey.”

   The barking Rottweiler stopped when he saw Lip and began licking all over his face.

   “Hi, Buster,” Lip said as he scratched the dog. “I’ve missed you.”

   “Well, he’s missed you too, I don’t know if I can say the same for Y/N,” Hailey said.

   Lip sighed as he straightened up. “Look, I know I f-cked up majorly with Y/N and I’m sorry. I just want to apologize and if she doesn’t want to be friends with me anymore, that’s fine, I’ll understand. Is she okay?”

   Hailey’s e/c eyes softened slightly at Lip’s words but she kept a tense body language. “She’d be better off if that idiot hadn’t cheated on her weeks after she lost her best friend. But she’ll get through it, she’s tough.”

   “I know, is she here?”

   Hailey pursed her lips. “That Will guy might’ve hurt her but you really broke her heart, you know that, Gallagher?”

   “Yeah…”

   “I could kill you for how much you made her cry and then Will on top of that—” Hailey breathed.

   “And I’ll do my best to never make her cry again. Believe me, the last thing I want is to hurt her.”

   Lip hoped his sincerity showed through since Hailey was one of the most stubborn people when it came to protecting her family and doing what she thought was right.

   “She went to the Symphony. They let her listen to the music from the entry way as long as she doesn’t disturb anyone.”

   “Thanks, Hailey, I really appreciate it.”

   The L couldn’t have operated any slower that day, which made Lip even more anxious. He began chain smoking, hoping it would help him think more, but it didn’t. It calmed him down a little, but he still had no idea what he was going to say to her. Fortunately, downtown wasn’t very crowded and it was easy for him to find his way to the Symphony. Sure enough, Y/N was sitting near one of the door, cross-legged, listening intently to the passionate music. She looked gorgeous though she was wearing a simple white summer dress that went off the shoulders. Her hair was twisted up into a pretty bun on top of her head and her back was facing Lip.

   He carefully walked up to her, his mind racing with words.

   “Mind if I join you?”
    Y/N gestured for him to sit without turning away from the door. Her eyes were puffy and he could tell that she had been crying.

    “Y/N, I need to talk to you.”

    “Sh, it’s Beethoven’s Symphony No. 9,” Y/N hissed.

    “Oh, right, sorry.” Lip managed to say quiet for five more seconds before saying, “no, you know what, f-ck the music, you can get this sh–t on YouTube or iTunes. We need to talk.”

   “Keep your voice down or we’ll get kicked out,” Y/N said quietly. 

   “Fine, but at least look at me when I talk?”
   Y/N hesitated before turning to Lip. “Talk.”

   Lip paused. Everything he had rehearsed seem to leave his mind. “You’re beautiful.”

   Y/N rolled her eyes. “Go away, Lip.”

   “No, I’m serious. Even though that a—hole made you cry and did all that to you, you’re the most beautiful girl I’ve ever seen. Always have been.”

   There was a long pause between them but Y/N looked stunned.

   “Is that all you have to say to me?”

    “No, I’m sorry about what happened between us. I shouldn’t have gotten so pissed off about you and that jerk.”

    “You were a real jackass,” Y/N muttered.

    “I know, and you didn’t deserve that. And I’m sorry about what happened—-no, you know what, f-ck that, I’m not sorry. He didn’t deserve to be with you because you are amazing and sweet and talented and tough and strong. He doesn’t deserve to breathe the same air as you and neither do I.”

    Y/N looked stunned but suddenly looked dejected. “If I’m all those things, why did he cheat on me with Ashley Opperman, Jane Henkins, Mariah Little, Penny Gilbert, Vanessa Langley, and Iman Ashton?”

    “Because he’s an idiot who’s probably trying to get the clap if he got anywhere near Vanessa Langley,” Lip said.

    Y/N smiled. “I think she’s had ever STD under the sun besides AIDs.”

   Lip smiled. “I’m so sorry about everything that happened between us, Y/N. Is there any way you could forgive me?”
   Y/N jokingly tapped her finger against her chin. “If you teach me how make things explode using that fancy technical vocabulary, maybe.”

   “Of course.”

   “And you help me pass my ACT.”

   “Okay.”

   “And you come to my piano concerts.”

   “I already do.”

   “Sober, though.”

   “Then you’ll have to play something less boring.”

   “Deal.”

   They jokingly shook hands before Y/N wrapped her arms around Lip and basically fell into his lap. He immediately pulled her close, inhaling her sweet scent.

    “I’ve missed this,” she whispered.

    “I love you.”

    They both froze. Lip couldn’t have said that any less smoothly if he tried. He couldn’t believe that he had blurted it out like that.

    Y/N pulled away slowly and looked at him with wide eyes. “Lip?”

    “I’ve loved you since we first met and I fell in love with you around the same time, I think. It drove me crazy seeing you with Will and I’m sorry I was so mean to you. If you don’t feel the same way then—”

    Lip was cut off as Y/N pressed her lips against his. He immediately pulled her closer as he kissed back. All those emotions they had for the past sixteen years came out in that exchange. They were so caught up they not only forgot where they were but also that they would need to pull away for air.

     “Eh hem.” An elderly security guard looked at them with distaste.

    “What’s your problem?” Lip asked.

    “Sorry, Ivan, we’ll be leaving now.”

    “No, that’s fine, Y/N, just try to ease up on all of that.” Ivan gestured to their current position.

   “You got it, Ivan.”

   He wandered away and Lip pulled Y/N into him again.

   “So, I’m guessing you like me too?”

   “No, I love you, I thought as smart as you are, you would’ve caught onto that when we were at least four,” Y/N teased.

   “Well, I’m smart enough to never let you go again.”

   “Good.”

    And that was how after many years, Lip Gallagher ended up with the girl from around the block.

This Is War (Part 2 of Runaway Ballerina)

Pairing: Dean x sister!reader, Sam x sister!reader, Castiel x sister!reader 

Warnings: Fluff, fluff and fluff

Summary: Chaos and war within the bunker between siblings.

Part 1

For those of who wanted a part 2 here you go!!! Hope you guys don’t mind that I tagged you in Part 2.  @sandlee44 @supdarling @queenpammy13 @evyiione @radstudenttravelerblr @straightasdeanwinchester @violinmyhead @xfanqirlinq @cozyjaws @meeshw777 @sassyspn67 @winchesters-favorite-girl @i-is-small-winchester @dauntless-dean @moose-and-sqruille-lover @galifreyanotaku @skeletoresinthebasement @babygoatsaf

Originally posted by green-circles

It’s late at night around 3:15 am and Cas is sitting in the bunker library reading some lure on witches to try and help Y/N get back to normal. He suddenly hears a chair next to him scrape the wood floors. He slowly looks to his right to see a tiny Y/N sitting on her calves with her dark brown hair all over the place with one of Dean t-shirts as pajamas, her eyes red and puffy.

“What’s wrong? Why are you not sleeping?” He ask.

“I has a bad dream. I don’t wanna sleep no more.”

“Why don’t you go to Sam or Dean’s room?”

“I don’t wanna wake them up, I usually went to my daddy’s bed bu-but he’s not here.” She says looking down. Cas face softens hearing this from her. “Castill” she says. Cas chuckles hearing her butcher his name. “Castiel.” He corrects. “Case.. cast…Castie.” She says frowning and Cas sits there smiling. “Can you take me for a drive?” She ask. “A drive?”

“When I can’t sleep my daddy takes me on a ride.”

“Well I don’t have a car.”

“We can take baby.”

“I don’t think Dean would like it if I took his car that he considers as an infant.”

“Well, Dean told me you’re baby in a trench coat and that you have wings like a fairy. So can you fly me someplace?” Cas frowns at this remembering the day at the diner. “I’m don’t think that’s a good idea Y/N.”

“Please Castie!” She begs. “I don’t wanna see anymore monsters in my dreams.” She whimpers. He looks down at her pouty face and sighs. “Only for a few minutes.” He gives in. She gasp reaching up for him. He picks her up and zaps them to a field. Cas sets her on his lap and they both look up at the stars. “How many stars do you think there are?” Cas ask pointing up.

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Morning Sickness

Requested: No (Please excuse typos)

Summary: You suffer from morning sickness and Shawn doesn’t know what to do 

I ran a hand through my hair as I placed the last of the dishes in the dishwasher and gripped the edge of the kitchen sink. I hovered over it as the feeling of nausea washed over me. I’ve been feeling the urge to throw up all morning, but it just goes away. I jumped at the feeling of two strong arms wrapping around my torso.

“Morning beautiful.” Shawn said against my neck.

“Morning.” I said with a laugh as he placed a kiss on my neck. I turned around in his arms as he gently pushed me against the sink.

“How are you feeling?” I rolled my eyes.

“The doctor said everything is fine.” I said playfully pushing him away.

“I’m talking about last night.” He said making his way to the fridge. “You were tossing and turning all night. You ok?” He asked grabbing bacon and put it in a pan on the stove.

“Yeah. I just-“ Suddenly a horrible smell filled the kitchen causing my stomach to turn. I covered my nose. “What is that smell?” Shawn gave me a quizzical look.

“Bacon. You love bacon.” He said. I shook my head.

“I think I’m gonna be sick.”  I stated running full speed to the nearest bathroom. Once I got there I quickly opened the toilet, violently tossing up everything I had for breakfast. Shawn came running in after me, a look of concern taking over his face. Once I was done, I sat on the floor leaning my head against the wall.

“Y/n?”

“Don’t come in here. It’s disgusting.” I said weakly.

“Y/n, baby, I’m worried about you.” He said. With that, a wave of nausea crashed over me causing me to hurl over the toilet again. Shawn grabbed his phone out of his pocket and left the room. I leaned against the wall as I took deep breaths as my stomach continued to turn.

Shawn came back and handed me the phone, where I saw his mom looking at me sympathetically. He told her.

“Hey, Y/n. How are you doing honey?”  She asked. Before I could even answer I hurled myself over the toilet once again. Violently tossing up anything that was left. I handed the phone to Shawn.

“Yep. That’s defiantly morning sickness.” I heard Mrs. Mendes say over the phone as I continued to toss up my guts.

“What do I do, Mom?” Shawn asked.

“You have to let it pass. Is there a smell that started it?”

“Just the bacon I was making.” Shawn replied.

“Throw out the bacon and go change your clothes. It has the smell all over it.” Mrs. Mendes instructed. Shawn left the room, taking his phone with him. I returned to my position on the wall and closed my eyes. The sound of Shawn sitting next to me made me open them.

I laid my head on his chest, taking in the smell of him, making my stomach settle.

“Please don’t go.” I asked weakly.

“Shh. I’m not going anywhere. Even if we are here all day. I’ve got you” He said rubbing my back.

And sure enough, we were there all day and Shawn didn’t move a muscle.


Annoying

“That’s starting to get annoying.”

“What? What are you talking about, Y/N?” Spencer’s head popped up from where it was buried in the book he was reading, his glasses sliding down his nose just barely. He cocked his head to the side slightly, staring at you in confusion when you didn’t answer immediately. He closed the book that was on his lap and uncrossed his legs and laid them out, showcasing the mismatched socks he always seemed to wear—one was orange with pumpkins on it and the other had purple and black stripes on it.

He’s such a nerd, you thought. But he was your nerd.

“No one should be this cute! Like, you haven’t washed your hair in days and I mean, I totally get it, I hate washing my hair too, and it’s good to not wash it so often because of the natural oils or whatever the hell those beauty people online always talk about, but it’s just not normal for you to rock it! And those pajamas pants have a hole in them and your sweater’s too large for you and your socks don’t match because they never do and you have the biggest bags under your eyes because you’ve been running on basically no sleep and all coffee these past few days and all I’m focusing on is the fact that I still find you incredibly attractive and lovely. That’s annoying! Stop it. Just stop being so cute!” You finished your rant and blushed right away, realizing how crazy you sounded. Who yells at their boyfriend for being cute, you think.

Spencer got flustered and just managed to choke out, “lovely, huh?”

You rolled your eyes and smiled, “yes, you dork. You’re the loveliest person I’ve laid my eyes on. It’s a crime, really.”

He laughed and corrected you, “I chase the people who do the crimes, I don’t commit them.”

“Yeah, yeaaaah,” you drew out. “I remember.

Spencer set the book aside and motioned for you to come closer. You took it a step farther and sat in his lap so you were straddling him. He didn’t even blink at the motion, so used to how touchy you were.

You leaned your head down so your forehead was touching his. “Hi,” you whispered.

He smiled the smile that was only ever aimed at you and your heart sped up, “hello to you, too.”

You kissed his left cheek, then his right, then hovered above his lips. “I love you.”

Spencer moved upwards, catching your lips for far too short of a time, in your opinion. “I love you, too, Y/N,” he said softly.

“Hmmmm, how much?” you asked, smirking.

“Very much,” he reassured you.

“Enough toooooo…. get some breakfast food with me?” you grinned.

He shook his head, biting back a laugh. “Y/N, it’s 11:30 pm. Do you really want to get breakfast right now?”

You got up from Spencer’s lap, grabbing his hand and dragging him up as well. “No time like the present, lover boy! C’mon, put some shoes on so we can go to the diner that’s open 24/7.”

He moved slowly, laughing when you made disappointing noises.

As you both made your way out of the apartment you two shared, Spencer put his arm around your shoulders, bringing you in tighter to him. You moved your head to the side and leaned up, kissing his cheek.

He glanced down at you, stopping momentarily in the hallway, “so are you still mad at me for being so cute and the loveliest person you’ve ever laid your eyes on?”

You pushed him away, “That was a moment of weakness and I’m nearly positive I didn’t say it exactly like that.”

He raised his eyebrows, his eyes glinting with amusement. “You’re telling the guy with the eidetic memory that you’re sure you didn’t say it exactly like that? Really, Y/N?”

“I suddenly can’t hear you,” you said. “All I can hear is the sound of the waffles and pancakes and eggs and bacon being made.”

“Y/N—“

“I can nearly taste it now!” you declared dramatically.

Spencer grabbed your hand in his, “Alright, alright. I got the hint, let’s go.”

You looked over at your boyfriend, happiness etched on his face and you knew that same look was mimicked on yours.

You really did love him more than anything on the planet.

Except maybe the waffles at the 24/7 diner.

The 4 of Us

Summary: It’s you and Bucky’s 5 year anniversary! Bucky decides to get you a puppy, but you have a surprise for him as well! | Bucky x Reader
Warnings: a lil swearing, pregnancy? lol
Word count: 2,3 k
A/N: ALL THE FEELSSS

MASTERLIST | ASK/REQUEST | TAG LIST

Originally posted by buckysclique

Bucky woke up that morning more excited than ever. Today was your 5 year anniversary and he had a special day planned. He looked over his shoulder where you were still sleeping, resting on your stomach, one leg dangling off the bed. He placed a tender kiss to your bare shoulder, remembering the activities of last night – something you two were definitely repeating tonight. Bucky strolled to the dresser to slip on a fresh pair of boxers and simple grey sweatpants.

As he searched the fridge for some eggs, he thought about his plans once more. Make breakfast, go to the grocery store, come back home, order some pizza, then cuddle on the couch while watching your favourite movies and then he would have to go out again to go get your present. Bucky knew you’d scold him about it, because you didn’t want any presents or fancy dinners, thus why for the 4th year now you always stayed at home and did cozy stuff, it’s just the way you liked it. But this year, Bucky couldn’t help himself. He saw the way you always longingly look at the pet shop when you pass it. You were a huge animal lover, dogs being your favourite. He didn’t know if you had a favourite breed, so when he stepped in the pet shop the other day to look at a potential new family member his eyes immediately fell to a tiny Pug puppy padding around. The pup was a little boy already named Charlie. His curled up tail and squashed face made his heart melt and Bucky knew he had found the one. So when he was frying eggs and bacon he couldn’t wait to go pick up the little pup later. Bucky smiled to himself as he felt your arms snake around his waist.

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Wrong Loves Her Company (NSFW 18+)

A/N: Sorry this took so long, but I’m still a little sick and this weekend was crazy so it took me long than normal to finish this. This just a drabble, so it’s a little shorter than normal. Also, this part is based off the assumption that you’ve read part 6  so if you haven’t, I would read it so certain things make more sense. The finale (part 7) will be coming out on Sunday. I’m not ready, but it’s going to be long and angsty. I hope this holds you over until then. Also this is from Dylan’s POV, if I didn’t already mention that. Love you always, babes.

Thanks to: @writing-obrien

Warning: Oral

Word Count: 2612

Part 1-6 [Here]:

Originally posted by stiles-and-lydia-tho

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The Best Girlfriend

Pairing: Sam Winchester x Reader

Words: 1,453

Forever Tag List: @capandbuck @bummblebeeblue @sarbear429 @bea789 @xtina2191 @lovethefandomsuniverse @evyiione @trustnobodyshootfirst @motleymoose @thegoodhunterrr5 @bookaddictedhedgehog @gurlwitafro @magicalsis11 @aquabrie @fanboyswhereare-you @percussiongirl2017 @dionnemaria @sherlockslove112 @sesshomaru-lover @freaksforthewin @neishax-butler @hi-pixzza @cookee50 @captainidjit @imasunflower13 @clairedelalune @swimmer-sarcasm @lovelife-tothefullest @dylcole @almightyunnie @winchesterswantmypie

Request: Hey, I was wondering if you could do a one shot where Sam has anxiety, and a secret girlfriend (reader) and Dean would get pissed if he found out, and one day Sam has a panic attack and makes dean call his girlfriend. Thank you so much!!!! - @loveyalotslikejellytots

Author’s Note: You’re welcome! I hope you like it. I’m still behind on this season, over six episodes by now. I’ll eventually make myself watch it between the season ends. – Haley xx


Your name: submit What is this?

“Hello?” I asked, balancing the cellphone between my ear and shoulder. There was shuffling on the other end, but no answer. “Sam? Are you okay?”

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texts from last night! meme

[text] Does me being hung over take away from how professional I can be today?

[text] The bar would not accept my money. I have reached God status here

[text] He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.

[text] I asked him for something to clean up with after sex and he handed me a sham wow. A SHAM WOW

[text] So I was putting on a condom and looked to my right to not make eye contact, she said did you just look at the American flag while putting that on. I said this one’s for Team USA.

[text] He gave me the “find somebody who wants to date you for who you are” speech while I walked around the house asking people for pants.

[text] I will show up on your front porch in a wet t shirt and some mac and cheese

[text] I just got high off one hit and then Spent 20 minutes inspecting the gasket of our refrigerator and researching ways to replace it

[text] Seriously. I’m like, “Wait, we are actually talking about physics in the middle of sex and its ACTUALLY erotic because you’re so fucking intelligent I’m turned on?”

[text] Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?

[text] He fucked me so hard my nail polish actually chipped. I’m keeping him.

[text] I’m making poor life decisions again. Tune in tomorrow to see how much I hate life.

[text] It’s a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.

[text] Just woke up with an entire pack of Oreos in my cheetah onesie. I’ve been waiting for this moment forever.

[text] Lesson learned. Don’t roleplay with a real knife.

[text] We got drunk and crashed a fifty year old woman’s birthday party for the food. Whoops.

[text] He asked me if I wanted to blow his whistle and proceeded to pull out an actual whistle.

[text] I woke up this morning with 3 phone numbers, a red Chinese New Year envelope with cash in it, and a winning scratcher all stuffed in my bra. I’d say it was a pretty successful Thursday night.

[text] I’m wearing sunglasses around my house. Douchebag status. The hangover is real.

[text] He’s like… An octopus that touches my vagina in all these diff ways at the right times. It’s almost unsettling

[text] I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I’ve found the One.

[text] Do me a favor I want you to reach down the front of your pants and underwear and just feel around for a while… if you happen to find your balls then join us

[text] i just walked into a room at this party and someone yelled “dibs!”…

[text] and then she said I drew a line on her forehead with my cum and whispered “Simba”

[text] so I was just driving high and I stopped to let a pinecone cross the road because I thought it was a hedgehog.

[text] Sex on bubble wrap = best decision ever.

[text] Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me

[text] We get an extra hour of sleep. That means we can take an extra shot tonight. Sounds logical. Thank you daylight savings.

[text] when someone at the bar asked you a question all you knew how to say was “chug-a-lug”

[text] There’s a girl in class eating a pumpkin pie. Like a whole pie straight from the pan with a fork.

[text] Apparently I taped knives to my hands and made everyone call me wolverine

[text] My house smells like bleach. Also, I do not feel bad about all the stuff I stole from the hospital while I was there.

[text] He told me he loved me. I didn’t know what to say so i just squirted the baby oil at him

[text] Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten

[text] Can I even tell you how badly I want a day that is just on and off napping and sex with intermittent snack breaks? Because I want that day very badly.

[text] He came so hard that he yelled what sounded like a spell from Harry Potter.

[text] we were both freshly single and using each other as rebounds. most intense sex I’ve ever had. i felt like a grizzly bear emerging from hibernation in a whirlwind of sexual fury

[text] I need a drink and a shade of lipstick that will put the fear of God in a man’s heart.

[text] When was the last time you wore pants?

[text] I’ve replaced you with thin mints and masturbation

[text] Tuesday Boozeday turned into What-the-fuck-were-you-thinking Wednesday real fast.

[text] Have you ever had chicken nuggets while high? Because it tastes like hearing the Beatles for the first time

[text] Being able to fart in my own house is like 90% of why I pay rent

[text] We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.

[text] I just accidentally showed an old lady a pic of my penis while showing her cat pics. So how’s your day going?

[text] I found a door knob in my purse this morning, I hope whoever it belonged to doesn’t need it today.

[text] We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What’s wrong with this tradition?

[text] all i’ve had to eat today is leftover bday cake and a shot of tequila.

[text] Pretty sure the guy I hooked up with Saturday gave me a buy one get one free coupon for chipotle. Who said nice guys don’t exist?

[text] Apparently nothing brings out sympathy in a barista like asking if they have a hangover special

[text] And when I feel bad about myself I go to the library and suck my pen over an open book, counting the seconds until a guy sits across from me and tries to get my attention

[text] This is a mass text to all my friends. Whoever gets this first, please find me and confiscate my phone immediately. I am far too high to have it. Even if you have to punch me in my face to get it. Otherwise, let the “High While Analyzing Disney Movies” texts begin.

[text] Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won’t quit poking me on fb

[text] I am trying to think of a way to make alcohol cupcakes

[text] One of us needs to be functional tomorrow and it won’t be me. I’m drinking liquor out of a fishbowl.

[text] You pulled the fire alarm because you had to shit and there was someone in the bathroom. you said you needed privacy

[text] im guessing your the one that tried to make bacon in the toaster

[text] just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.

[text] I just made out with a girl with a life jacket on wtf is going on

[text] Let’s play a little game called “Chill the Fuck Out” - you’re our first contestant

[text] Didn’t get laid. But got a free pie from a waitress. A whole pie.

[text] I am swimming in semen. He must have been holding it in for a special occasion.

[text] you should buy a sheep. A) you get an awesome pet. B) free coat

[text] tonight is going to be epic. can you pre-book an ambulance?

[text] We thought you were crowd-surfing until we realized it was the bouncers throwing you out

[text] maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game

[text] i think its awesome that according to your mom i’m your friend that caught on fire.

[text] So fucked up. Can’t tell if I’m starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.

[text] I just saw a hobo ride by on a unicycle. Good day.

[text] Vodka is such a love hate relationship.

[text] you traded sex for a burrito?

[text] I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.

[text] You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.

[text] it’s not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.

[text] You’re always adorable, but when you’re drunk, you’re like Chia Pet adorable.

[text] this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest

[text] I was cleaning up my drunken mess and I found my ID in a cereal box

[text] I am now the proud owner of a 10-12 year old’s Optimus Prime costume from Walmart. Tomorrow is going to be a good day.

[text] It’s like eating cereal and milk but instead of cereal it’s gummy bears and instead of milk it’s vodka.

[text] You leave a trail of fuck everywhere you go

[text] Scott woke me up by cracking a beer open in my face. Best friends are awesome.

[text] we woke up to him feeding us cheetos at 3am. and by feeding i mean shoving them in our mouths and saying “i mean who doesn’t like cheetos”

[text] quit making up holidays to get me to go drinking with you

[text] I left a cheeto on everyone’s car trailing to the house i’m at, hanzel and gretel style.

[text] Just got a event reminder on my phone to never party with you again.

[text] nobody understood you. You kept speaking french and hiding shit in your boobs

[text] When I came home you were using a glowstick to eat peanut butter from the jar.

[text] kinda considering buying a life alert for sophomore year

[text] My phone auto-corrects smirnoff to poisoned. I think it is trying to tell me something.

[text] Anywhere you can eat green eggs and ham, you can have sex.

[text] you were running down the aisles of wal mart singing ‘follow the yellowbrick road’. i’m pretty sure you thought the night shift workers were the munchkins & started crying when they wouldnt help u find the wizard. needless to say u were pretty stoned/wasted

[text] It’s like the only way I know how to apologize is by giving a blow job.

[text] did you by any chance leave me that 7 minute long voicemail of you running and constantly tripping into bushes?

[text] The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.

[text] I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!

[text] You handed some guy a spoon you found, he yelled SPOON GAME, and then the two of you spent the next 20 minutes throwing spoons all over the kitchen.

[text] I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.

[text] So I woke up today with someone’s door knob in my pocket. I hope everybody else got out of the house ok.

[text] So we successfully lit our bathtub on fire. Thought you should know.

[text] Because when I say 'You shouldn’t drink anymore’, she hears, 'I personally challenge you to chug 3 more mixed drinks’

[text] okay, this game isn’t funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.

[text] The lack of pants and amount of productivity in my life right now is amazing.

[text] when i start to cry when i lose at mario kart is when you should put me to bed

[text] so apparently the car got towed with me passed out in the back seat.

[text] You closed the sidewalk off to pedestrians last night. With a glitter covered safety cone

[text] never. drinking. again.

[text] I’m gonna get drunk and through up on the first happy couple I see.

[text] got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night

[text] I need a good reason NOT to eat this entire jar of nutella right now

[text] i’m out of smokes so i just had an after sex popsicle. this might become an addiction.

[text] Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.

5

“There is a place for everyone in our universe
And you my friend are far from home
But me?
I’m right where I want to be” —-
I’m so sorry for the long ass post and for another sappy klance pic with lame quotes!! (I made up the quote for those who are wondering!)
I am a slut for keith feeling like he’s finally home with his space family and of course with lance lol

Please Don’t Bite >

Please Don’t Bite

Capt. Kirk / Reader

Reader Insert / Songfic

Warnings: Mentions of sex, a few f-bombs are dropped

Song: BITE // Troye Sivan


Kiss me on the mouth and set me free

Sing me like a choir

You opened your eyes, breathing in deeply. You had a headache and were in a room you didn’t recognize. The bed was firm but plush, the blankets were pooled above your chest. The night before was a blur.

I can be the subject of your dreams

Your sickening desire

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99 Reasons

Fandom: Marvel

Paring: Steve Rogers x Reader

Summary: It’s Steve’s 99th Birthday, so you give him 99 reasons why you love him.

A/N: On July 4th, 1918, Steven Grant Rogers was born…HAPPY BIRTHDAY STEVIE!!!

Warning: ULTIMATE FLUFF ALERT. also, this is pretty lengthy. but whatevs.

Originally posted by knowles-morgan


You were awake really early today. You were just too excited. It was your husband, Steve’s 99th birthday. Big wow! For the first 5 minutes after you woke up, you just watched the super soldier sleep. His face was neutral, but you could tell how content he was. You heart swelled knowing that you were the cause. 

You cautiously kissed him on the forehead and slipped out of bed walking towards your dresser. You opened the top drawer and dug underneath your clothes to find the little cards. This was your birthday present to Steve. 

You crept quietly to the edge of the bed and laid out the first 10 then brought the rest with you. You went to the kitchen and set 10 more onto the counter island, then began to gather the things you needed to make breakfast.

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That Special Time of the Month

Originally posted by antisepticdark

Summary: Fem!Reader wakes up to find that her period came during the night and now she has to deal with the guys being annoying at the office… Well mainly just Mark. Hope you guys like!

A/N: Hello! I wrote a fic, and trust me its not very good and it’s waaay longer than it needs to be. Be gentle, I’m new to the whole posting my writing thing. Also! I speak fluent Spanish so i used some slang in the fic!
“No mames”- Spanish slang/curse for “no way”/“no fucking way”
“Sentida”- Spanish for upset or offended (in this context reader is sad)
Lastly there’s a text conversation in the fic so ‘-’ is Ethan and ‘=‘ is Tyler.

Wordcount: like +2k I’m sorry this is too long bye

Requests are open? This is no good so I don’t know why anyone would be requesting but yeah you can do that if you want. Hope you guys enjoy!

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Trashy child, trashy mom, trashy yard!

Okay so buckle up as I unwind a marvelous tale of revenge, lust, betrayal and MURDER! Okay, maybe just some petty revenge. On mobile.

Now look here. I live in a nice residential neighborhood. We are the only college students in a sea of families. Because of this I make a point to be respectful to these families. No raging parties, just the occasional bonfire. Not midnight screaming match with the boyf. No loud sex noises. All in all, best college neighbors ever.

However, there is the one woman who is always just a jerk. About once a calender season, her and her boyfriend have screaming matches in the street between 2-4am. And I don’t mean they fight for 2 hours straight and I could walk out and yell at them. I am the kind of person who would do that. Instead they fight, usually about her cheating??? Then walk a few blocks down, I fall asleep then they come back just as I drift off. But you know what, I don’t know her life. I let it slide.

But this dickfuzz of a woman also has a child. She yells at him a lot but never at night. Again not my problem. Until yesterday. Little heathen is prancing around my yard picking dandelions. Cool little man, do you. But no, I forgot this SOB is a the hell spawn that even Satan didn’t want to own up to making. Out of nowhere kicks the full trash can awaiting pick up into my yard.

This is not a bump oh noooo situation. Little beast flat round house kicked it sent everything flying. I was in clear view on the porch at this point enjoying an after dinner coffee and I rightfully contain any swearing. Instead I say, “what are you doing? Pick that up!”

Not even a sorry as the kid dashes away to his house. I get up to cross the street to knock on his door and Noone answers. I know his mother is home, her car is there and TV was on. But hey, maybe not. I’m not breaking down the door to find out. I pick up my trash and toss it back into the can and continue on with my night.

Little did I know, the boyf threw out the cat food my cat didn’t like. I was unaware it still had food in it, which then scattered into my yard. Cue me waking up the next morning getting ready to rush to class when BAM trash EVERYWHERE!!! Just as the garbage men drive by with a apologetic look.

As I look sadly at the scattered dreams,  a neighbor sitting on her porch calls out. Said she thought she had heard raccoons last night then a bang. This is very likely since there was a trail of cat food leading up to a treasure trove of raccoon snacks. Well, time to skip class to clean up since I’m being watched.

Now my boy and I cook a lot. We always throw out our left overs from the week on garbage night. Last night when I cleaned it up it was still a bit cold. But now, it has been baking in the unseasonably warm can and has festered. Nasty gross uck. Plus it has to go back behind my house until next week. Suddenly the kids mother appears and starts outright whining about how college kids are so inconsiderate, never take care of their yards, litter, ect.

Okay. Losing patience, but maybe she didn’t know. I calmly explain what happened yesterday and how it most likely factored into the events of the morning. (Never had raccoon problems ever) I didn’t even solely blame her kid, even though it only happened because of Deathwing  Jr.

She just goes on a tiraide about how it couldn’t be her flame imp of a child. How my yard always looked like this and I was just trying to blame it on her kid. (Like really? I’ve always had bacon fat crusted boxes hanging out in my yard?) And how she’s glad someone finally made me pick it up but if I don’t stop involving her child she would report me to the HOA. (Uh, we don’t have one? ) She proceeded to complain as crossed the street while unfortunately not being hit by a car.

Alright. Long fuse, big bomb. I silently pick up the rest of the crap and ignore the neighbors comments about what a horrid woman she was. Instead I begin plotting.

You see the trench swan has a baby. And I see her take out the trash at least once a night, with what I am assume are stink bombs of diapers. As soon as night falls I enact my plan. I grab a handful of cat TREATS! Racoon go bonkers for them. And make a small invisible trail to her trash can in the alley. I even prop open the lid with a stick. I’m barely out of sight when I see the first set of reflective eyes.

This morning I was woken up much happier at 7am to her screaming about all raccoons needing to be shot. (Hey now, they’re just trying to eat.) Take a peak and they had not only thrown the dirty diapers and other trash all over the alley but also dragged it all over the right side of her front yard. Took her 2 hours to clean up after the hour of complaining while standing in dirty diaper scent range hoping a neighbor would help her. Eventually made the kid come out to help, (why is he not in school, like it’s a freaking Thursday) now he knew, but there isnt a damn thing he can do about it. Just gave me the evil eye while i sat on the porch. That was a good cup of coffee.

I will continue to do this every few nights until the next trash day. So maybe a solid more times. Plus, raccoons get a nice snack. I just hope I remember to bring snacks next time.

TLDR; Brat knocked over my trash can, I cleaned up but raccoons knocked it over again due to his roundhouse kick. Mom then complained about the trash in my yard as I was cleaning it up. Baited their diaper filled trash for prime racoon attack. It worked. Diapers everywhere. Got to watch them clean up.

Note: if they put out traps I will cancel the plan and disable the traps. No need for our furry scavengers to get hurt.

UPDATE TIME: Tried to do it again last night. Wanted to scope out the area. Diner squall is sitting on the porch in the dark muttering in the dark to her boyfriend? I haven’t seen them throw out any trash yet. No sign of raccoons either. Will update when I see them throw out something and reenact the plan.

LAST UPDATE: So I’m too busy to maintain this thread or my revenge. My petty fire has died. Saw her throw out a diaper genie bag last night. (Ew) called on the coons one last time. Was messy as hell when I went to bed at 1 last night. Cleaned up the morning. For good measure when I saw her come home today after my classes she looked dead tired. I am amused. Goodbye!

No Pain-No Gain

Request:  I’m not sure if you do like one shots or stuff but I had an idea for a soulmate au where someone’s soulmate can feel there pain. Like a a person breaks their foot, their soulmate will feel it to, just not have a broken foot. Image how Clarks soulmate would react with all that stuff. I think it would be cute, but could be kinda angsty. Just an idea. Idc if you do it or not, just thought it was cool. Have a nice day.
Word Count: 9636.
Pairings: Clark Kent/Superman x Reader
WARNINGS: Lots of swearing. Mentions of: low self-esteem issues, traumas, bullying, weakness complex. Angst (personally, I don’t consider this very angsty but, you need to be warned). Also, I’m sorry for any typos since this was not edited and english is my second language.
Author’s Note: Hope this isn’t to cheesy and that you will be able to enjoy it. Also… NINE THOUSAND WORDS IN LESS THAN A WEEK?! That’s a record for me! Anyway, hope you enjoy this and that the anon who requested it isn’t disappointed.

Originally posted by sir-henry-cavill

Originally posted by amancanfly

Originally posted by amancanfly

Yes, I totally needed three gifs of Henry Cavill. You did too, don’t deny it.


I hate my soulmate, that’s for fucking sure. I totally hate him (or her, you never knew) and I don’t give a single fuck if I haven’t met him. Also, no, I’m not exaggerating in the slightest and yes, you can hate someone you haven’t met, thank you very much (and yes, even if it’s your fucking soulmate, especially mine).

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Customer’s Always Right

Hey guys! I really liked the idea of this gif imagine from @mikaelson-imagines .

Check their account out maybe? Anywho, thanks for reading! x


Working at the Mystic Grill was fun. It was an easy going work place, and you got to work side by side with one of your best friends, Matt Donovan. But there was a few down sides, like for example Stefan and Damon Salvatore.

You grabbed your black, leather pocket book and ball point pen, heading towards the table you were assigned to. You weren’t surprised to see Stefan and Damon’s familiar faces.”Hi Stefan, hi Damon.
“ You sighed, pinching the bridge of your nose in annoyance.

“How’s our favorite waitress?” Damon grinned, his piercing blue eyes not leaving the menu. 

“I’m fine. And you’ve been here so many times, i’m surprised you haven’t memorized the damn menu.” You snapped. 

“Oh. Come on sweetheart, is that a way to talk customers?” Damon snickered.

“Hi. Y/N, can I just get my usual?” Stefan offered you a kind smile. You nodded, writing down Stefan’s usual, which consisted of a basket of fries and a water.

“I’m gonna shake things up a bit. Y/N, will you be a doll and get me three vodka short, two limes and a thing of salt?” Damon smiled sweetly. 

“You’re not gonna eat anything?” Stefan questioned, raising an eyebrow. 

“Throw in a burger with extra bacon.” Damon shrugged.

After confirming their orders, and scolding them one last time, you made you way to the kitchen. Matt smiled at you. “Stef and Damon back… again?” He chuckled. 

“Yes. And they only sit in my section, it’s so annoying.” You rolled your eyes. Matt offered you a smile before helping you take the shots and the food to Stefan and Damon’s table.

“Ah! There she is!” Damon cheered. You glared at him, setting the three shots in front of him. “You really don’t think we’re annoying, do you?” Damon faked a pout. You stole a glance at Matt who was trying hard not to laugh.

You sighed, placing the fries in front of Stefan. “It’ll break poor, old Stefan’s heart if he knew we annoyed you.” He faked concerned. 

“You guys seriously can’t keep coming here. Or at least coming into my section, my boss is going to notice one day.” You lectured.

 Stefan nodded knowingly. “Sorry. We’ll leave you be for while.” He smiled softly. You sighed in relief. 

“We’ll just come here every other day.” Damon said, downing his last shot before licking the salt off his hand. “Now, be a babe and get me another round of shots?” You groaned. 

“Hey. In my defense, the customer’s always right.”