or that i should be grateful for the attention

i want someone to ask me what’s wrong and let me vent to them but even if they ask, i just end up saying i’m fine and i turn the conversation around onto how they are

i want someone to hug me tightly and let me sob into their chest and not let go until i’m okay because it’s so fucking hard trying to handle all of this on my own

i want people to help and i want to tell them just how shitty and difficult everything is but the reality is that i can’t open up to people because my problems are not valid or worthy of attention and talking about it makes me feel like i’m manipulating everyone

other people have it worse which means i should just suck it up and be grateful that i have things like food, clothes and shelter. but oh my god, i am just SO fucking miserable. i would give anything to just be happy, to not wake up disappointed that i didn’t die in my sleep, to not spend every day crying and shaking with anxiety and thinking about hurting and killing myself

i want to be calm, happy and at peace. i feel like i’m at war with my brain and it’s so draining, so exhausting and i feel like the most pathetic, worthless person in the world

I had a humbling experience today. 

I had a student in my class this semester who grated on my nerves every day. They asked random questions all the time, interrupted me, and argued with me  (not always rudely, just annoyingly) when I told them to correct things. They drove the other kids in the class crazy, I know, but I never allowed the students to say anything rude to the student, and I never let myself lose my temper. The one time a student did act rude to this particular student, I put a stop to it. I’m v. adamant in my classroom that no one should be singled out, made fun of, or treated with disrespect.

The student grated on my nerves more and more as the class went on. Forgetting assignments, not paying attention to the syllabus, more arguing. Though I was firm a few times and corrected the student, I never lost my temper, yelled, told them to get out, etc. I hate singling out students in class, mainly because it bothers my social anxiety, so I’m super aware of it with my students and how I interact with them. I try to limit any interaction that will put them on the spot or cause them discomfort, even if they’re driving me bonkers.  I generally corrected them, then just continued teaching. If they argued with me one on one, I explained their error and how to correct, or tried to offer suggestions to improve instead of getting mad.

Today, as the student left our last class, they gave me a hug and thanked me for the class and everything I did for them. They told me they unfortunately didn’t get into my class next semester, and then said I helped influence their future career/area for their future topic of study.

I almost cried. This student, who I was irritated with today and had to hold back from snapping at, hugged me and told me I influenced them only an hour later.

It was a moment where I realized why kindness and patience is so important. I could have lost my cool, been harsh with this student, etc, but I didn’t, bc that’s just not my nature. I just am not that kind of teacher. I consider myself too soft-hearted because I see my students as ppl I want to help succeed in any way I can, and many times go out of my way to help when it isn’t deserved. Often, I wish I was harder, stronger, harsher, colder as an instructor, but in that moment, I realized that the way I do things is important, too. 

I just realized afterwards that you really don’t ever know when you are influencing someone or being a positive influence. I never would have in a million years thought this student even cared for me at all. I’m really glad that I chose each time to take a breath and talk to the student calmly, to treat the student nicely during every interaction despite being annoyed most days, and to put an end to any comments from my other students. 

It made a small difference at least, and with the world like it is right now, I’m taking every small victory and positive I can.

Awkward moment when you realise a guy hitting on you is a racist a**hole, when you don’t like people of colour you should also stay away from black p*ssy. He posted some stupid sh*t about black men on his facebook timeline and I was just like so you can hate an entire group of people yet think it’s ok to like only one or two, I’m supposed to be flattered or feel superior just because your racist a** want to satisfy some sick fetish?! I won’t say that I regret my relationships with white men because I met 2 wonderful men who made me happy and one is still in my life but it’s moment like this that I think I’ll be better off with a black man. I met way too many white men who made me feel like I should be grateful for their attention, I’m beautiful only because they validate me. I pray to god that sven and I get old together, if we ever break up I’ll date only my own people and if I can’t find a good black man I’ll be alone till the day I die. Everyone think they can sh*t on black women just because we are “unattractive”, well my unattractive a** still won’t date you and let’s see how you’ll feel about being turn down by an ugly woman!

Red Velvet Reaction: You Taking Care of Them When They’re Sick

Irene: She feels really guilty and responsible, saying things like “No, please don’t make me soup, I should do that, it’s my fault for getting sick!” But inside, she’s very appreciative and grateful. Due to her motherly nature, she finds it weird being the one getting cared for but also nice.

Wendy: “Aaah, I’m dying.” Mostly complains, convinced she’s on the brink of death. Also complains if you get too close, “No, don’t, you’ll get sick too!” but lowkey loves the attention. She’s another motherly type in RV so being on the receiving end, being cared for, makes getting sick worth it … almost.

Seulgi: The type to refuse your care, swearing she doesn’t need it, that you shouldn’t inconvenience yourself. But being loved is her fav thing ever so also rejoices in the affection you show her, loving little gestures like you spoon feeding her or heating up a hot water bottle to keep her toes warm. Those little things show you care and make her say cheesy things like “Ah, with your loving touch, I’ll be better in no time!”

Joy: “This is the end for me.” Another over dramatic baby but also a vengeful one; “It was Wendy, she got me sick! Give *cough* give me the phone, I have to yell her out!” While being sick, doesn’t think much of your actions until afterwards, when she has a clear head. And she’ll adore you and cuddle you for days.

Yeri: Afraid to ask for help, in case it’s seen as being a baby or weak. So is glad that she has you (and her unnies) to care for her without needing to ask, bringing her tissues and hot drinks. “I’m sorry I look like this,” she’ll say, having grown so used to being focused on her image at such a young age. “I tried to brush my hair but I was too weak to stand.”

Make sure you not only look after her physically but mentally too, but reminding her that missing practice from a cold does not reflect poorly on her as an idol. She’ll be forever grateful and show it by buying you coffee or a treat when she’s better.

Originally posted by redvelvetupdates

anonymous asked:

DUDE I CAN RELATE SO HARD TO YOUR RECENT TEXTPOST I USED TO THINK DRAWING WAS SUCH A CHORE BECAUSE I KNEW ITNEVER GOT THE NOTES I WANTED BUT NOW IDC AND IVE BECOME MORE GRATEFUL THAN IVE EVER BEEN FOR EVERY SINGLE LIKE/REBLOG AND I FEEL SO HAPPY I ACTUALLY WANT TO DRAW NOW :D :D

It’s sad when art doesn’t get attention, especially when you put so much effort into things. But hell, I’ll avoid the nihilism and just say, people aren’t obligated to like our stuff. And that’s fine. Art should only be a chore if you’re getting paid for it and even then, you shouldn’t have to suffer for it.

I’ve said it before, I wanted to be a dark artist. Might have stemmed a lot from my depression in the early days, but I’ve wanted to draw sick and gruesome things. And now that I’m doing it, I’m happy. Though, happy things will appear on this blog! That isn’t going away. My art that’s been here, is not going away. I will just likely have more dark stuff. For now, I’m in the dark phase. It shouldn’t last that much longer :D

<333

“I take it, Harriet, that you have no new answer to give me?”
“No, Peter. I’m sorry, but I can’t say anything else.”
“All right. Don’t worry. I’ll try not to be a nuisance. But if you could put up with me occasionally, as you have done tonight, I should be very grateful to you.”
“I don’t think that would be at all fair to you.”
“If that’s the only reason, I am the best judge of that.” Then, with a return of his habitual self-mockery: “Old habits die hard. I will not promise to reform altogether. I shall, with your permission, continue to propose to you, at decently regulated intervals—as a birthday treat, and on Guy Fawkes Day and on the Anniversary of the King’s Accession. But consider it, if you will, as a pure formality. You need not pay the smallest attention to it.”
“Peter, it’s foolish to go on like this.”
“And, of course, on the Feast of All Fools.”
“It would be better to forget all about it—I hoped you had.”
“I have the most ill-regulated memory. It does those things which it ought not to do and leaves undone the things it ought to have done. But it has not yet gone on strike altogether.”

–Dorothy L. Sayers, Gaudy Night, Chapter IV, 1936.

4

“What I have now is about the show and not about me. I’ve been working in this business for 20 years, and I’m very grateful for what I have, but it’s going to end sooner or later. Should I fall into a depression because I’m not going to have that kind of attention someday? I can’t allow that because it’s just stupid.” - Nikolaj Coster-Waldau for Men’s Fitness USA (June 2015)

The food processor is, for me, hugely disappointing. Before owning one, I used to see them looking all shiny and powerful in the department store, and I’d fantasize about never chopping a vegetable by hand again. I failed to consider that cookbook authors have particular ideas about how each ingredient should be prepped. The food processor, no matter how many blades it may come with, often doesn’t cut it.

Take this recipe for lettuce wraps with hoisin-peanut sauce. It’s one of my go-to meals. To pull it off correctly, I’m instructed to mince the shallot, thinly slice the green onions, chop the cilantro, grate the ginger, and cut the cucumbers and carrots into matchsticks. Sheesh. I’d really rather just throw the ingredients in the food processor and move on. I’ve often wondered whether all this attention to the size and geometry of my produce cuts really matters.

Slice, Dice, Chop Or Julienne: Does The Cut Change The Flavor?

Photo: Paul Williams/Getty Images

@time-displaced-rutger continued from this

“Ah, well…” Eileen relieved to know that she didn’t wrong the man, but the tip he gave was right, indeed the shaman didn’t paid attention at the other people during her research and that had almost caused the bump between them. “I had not caution I am grateful for the warning” she sincerely thanked and at the question of the young man she vacillated, Eileen didn’t know if respond or not but decided to answer him “My Lord, I am searching for an hairpin of mine, I should have lost it somewhere in this village”.

All right. I’ve literally seen claims that Ginny annoys Harry with her attention on him in CoS. Like how fucking non-canon is that???? Harry pays attention to her and her emotions, is concerned for her, it’s the worst day of his life when he finds out that Ginny has been taken, he tries to make conversation with her, is positively surprised and grateful at her intervening against Malfoy, thinks that how her brothers treat her is not the right way to go, etc. 

Have these people even read the same books??

anonymous asked:

Imagine like jimin coming into jungkooks room at like 4am and jungkook is fast asleep on his back and jimin is just tracing his fingers along jungkooks bare chest and collar bones and then jungkook starts like smirking and jimin realises junkook is awake and gets embarrassed

Jimin tip toes over piles of dirty clothes and fan gifts to reach Jeongguk’s bed. The boy is fast asleep, as well he should be. They’d had multiple schedules today and Jeongguk looked exhausted my the time they got home. 

After his illness scare, Seokjin had insisted he go straight to bed. Jimin was secretly grateful. Jeongguk sighs and grumbles in his sleep and Jimin automatically brings a hand up to rub his back soothingly.

The gentle caresses turn to tracing shapes and letters into Jeongguk’s skin. The action is calming to Jimin himself, though he doesn’t really pay attention to what he’s writing. Not until…

“I love you? Really hyung? A little unoriginal don’t you think?” Jimin startles at Jeongguk’s voice.

“Oh! You’re awake. You scared me.” Jimin sighs, holding a hand over his heart to calm its fast beat. Jeongguk turns and blinks sleepily at him. He reaches out to take Jimin’s hand from his heart into his own. Flipping Jimin’s palm over, Jeongguk begins to trace the words back.

“I love you too hyung.” Jeongguk smiles as Jimin does. He tugs at Jimin’s wrist, pulling him under the covers with him.

“Go to sleep hyung.”

Send me a “cliche” trope or AU and I’ll write a short Jikook drabble based off of it ^.^   (no more please)

IN GENERAL :: Some people complain about OCs forcing ships on their canons, which happens and it definitely sucks, but then there’s also the canon rpers who force ships on OCs? Like?? I swear I’m not the only one? Okay just because I roleplay an OC, it does not automatically mean I want to ship with you because you play a canon. Don’t act like I should be grateful to you for having your character pay attention to my muse. I’m not “thirsty”. I am not any less of a roleplayer than you. My muse is not inferior.

World Building: Post-Apocalyptic Re-Build

cheating-universe asked:
Hey! The work you’re doing on this blog is astonishing and really helps everyone out, and I hope you’re aware how the following you authors are grateful for that. I do have also a question (sorry!). In the world I’m creating there was a very short apocalypse-thing - a lot of humanity got wiped out, but I’m starting few years after that - it’s over already - when we already are catching grip on the situation and start to rebuild everything. Is there something I should pay a specific attention to?



Thank you so much! I really appreciate that. :)

First and foremost, be sure to have an explanation for why your characters survived the apocalypse, and where and how they rode it out. Even if it’s not important in the grand scheme of things, it will probably come up in some way, and if not, you should still hold it in mind as you write.

Next you’ll want to think about how they got to wherever they settled. Who and what (if anything) was there when they got there? Take into consideration what things will be important for your characters to survive in this new world, outside of just the obvious like clean water source, shelter from the elements, and food supply.

Finally, you’ll want to spend some time on web sites and blogs focused on homesteading, survival, and prepping. These are excellent resources when it comes to painting an accurate picture of people trying to rebuild in an post-apocalyptic setting. There are also a lot of great documentary series centered on this subject, including the TV show “Doomsday Preppers.” So, if you can track them down, they’re also great resources.

tbh? overly sexual unsolicited comments by men on female selfies are always gross and uncomfortable but i STILL see a lot of women doing the same to guys they don’t even know? i assume it’s because they think men should always be ‘grateful’ for that type of female attention and it’s okay to do? 

it’s just as unwarranted for you guys to be all ‘FUCK ME’ or s/t in the tags like you could really REALLY be making someone uncomfortable and it’s just creepy and tacky to me and honestly taking advantage of the fact that a guy typically wouldn’t tell a girl off because he could be ridiculed as a result of bullshit standards? it’s just something i’d really like to see less of, sexual harassment goes both ways.

Dear Scott Gimple & Co.,

Thank you for finally including Carol Peletier in your TWD 6B promotional material. 


The picture and of course Melissa McBride both look lovely. 
We appreciate it and we appreciate Eugene being included in the shot as well.
In fact we are grateful for it and therein lies a huge problem that needs to be brought to your attention.
I am not trying to tell you how to do your job here but I think the fact that the majority of the fandom reacted to Carol’s picture not with relief that Carol is okay, but with relief that someone from the group (thank you Eugene!) finally looks like they care that Carol is okay, should tell you that the balance between humanity and the apocalypse in your story here is majorly Off. 

Off the charts kind of off. 


We shouldn’t need to see a picture to feel that someone cares about Carol’s well being.

We shouldnt feel that whoever looks at Carol with any kind of concern is the true MVP in her story. 


After all Carol is not just one of the original Atlanta Five and a core character, but also a woman who YOU have regularly risking her life and her very humanity for these people.
We shouldn’t have to wonder if the group cares about Carol at all, we should just KNOW that they do.
After all the things you’ve had Carol do and sacrifice for them, their concern and love for her should be a given. 
Undebatable even
The fact that we are so HAPPY about the fact that Eugene looks like he cares that she is experiencing discomfort and that he might actually attempt to comfort her in his awkward (and probably hilarious) way, is actually a big flaw in the way you’ve chosen to tell this story. 


By choosing Carol as the HERO so many times and by choosing the high cost parameters of what she’s willing to do to be the HERO the group needs, you’ve also created expectations about her motivations for being that HERO.
You’ve chosen to show Carol putting herself through a mountain of emotional pain, and now debilitating physical pain for these people and yet you haven’t adequately shown those very same people giving a damn about HER.
Some of these people don’t even know her at all. 
You had Carol save Abraham, Rosita, Eugene and Tara from Terminus, but failed to show that they are even aware of each other’s existence. 

Her connections have continuously dwindled and her losses have been piling up without reprieve or even so much as anyone noticing, let alone trying to address her personal turmoil.
Her relationships keep getting removed and while others are continuing to form new ‘bonds’, she’s left to fade away at the social periphery of the family/group.

She keeps sacrificing pieces of her humanity, compromising her own life and carrying the heavy burdens in the name of people who she obviously loves but we only get to see that love when things take a tragic turn.
We know that Carol would kill and does kill to protect ALL of them but imo you have failed to show us the WHY. 

Your writers keep taking away people who are shown to be connected to Carol and then they fail to replace those bonds or even give her a chance to express the fact that it’s a loss that affects her.
Failing to provide that background, not connecting her to anyone else but then using her to sacrifice herself and kill, to protect the people that haven’t shown much interest in her own well being, is a big time continuity error and could constitute 'bad writing’. 


Given all that, it’s not all that surprising that fans are clamoring to have Daryl be there for Carol - after all he’s the only one you’ve actually shown her having a canonically deep connection to. 
If not Daryl then who will be by her side?
Shipping aside, it would be hard to make an argument that anyone else would come to Carol’s aid because based on your canon material, there is no evidence that anyone would even know her enough to notice her suffering or her feelings.
That can’t possibly be your intention or the direction you want for your favourite character?
The HERO and the one whose story the critics and the media want to talk the most about? 

I am not trying to tell you how to do your job nor am I here to begrudge or mock Eugene’s MVP skills.
All I am saying that the reaction the fandom is having to that one picture should be a lesson and something to think about for the future.
A sign that maybe you are veering off in a direction that will cause an avalanche of problems and criticism the next time you decide to have Carol sacrifice a piece of a heart nobody else seems to know. 

I know it’s a big heart but without love and a connection to humanity, even a heart as big as the one Carol has, can grow dim and become shut down. 

I am not saying that you need to throw a Carol Party (although that would be a great bonus BTS addition) or get everyone to tackle her with thanks and praise (also great bonus BTS idea).
You know Carol and how the subtleties of her personality shine - the moments don’t need to be big or loud at all! 

Get the group to say her name every once in a while.
Give her a few ‘Hello’s’, a couple of 'How are you’s’ and maybe a few hugs here and there.
Let her talk to Michonne, Sasha, Rosita, Tara and Maggie.
Don’t have her cry alone all the time.
Get Daryl to look slyly at her again.
Maybe a few smirks and concerned looks here and there. 

No big deal, right?! 

Just complete the story is all I am saying. 

Maybe if you show the connection between the things Carol does, to the people Carol actually does those things for, on screen, you won’t have to worry about correcting the 'cold, emotionless, hardened, beautiful monster’ labels, off screen. 

I really don’t want to say 'YOU ARE DOING IT WRONG’ but I honestly think that 'YOU ARE DOING IT WRONG.’ 

You love Carol, the critics love Carol, the award show circuit loves Carol and we love Carol.
All that’s left is for you to show that the group loves Carol too!

Sincerely,

The Carol/Caryl Fandom

PS. A CARYL MOMENT is a great place to start.

It was bothersome enough that Usagi was jealous over Chibiusa before she found out she was her child in Crystal, but afterward? Honestly, it was really annoying to me and I would’ve slapped her if I could. It’s grating because Chibiusa is her child! A product of the love Mamoru and Usagi share! She JUST learned she was Queen and he was King in a world of general peace and prosperity and she bitches over their daughter getting attention from him? She should be the FIRST one helping him out!

Submitted by Anon

“So to the generally well-intentioned men in my life, please consider this: no matter what I accomplish or how self assured I am feeling, the aforementioned dickhead bouncers of the world will still believe they have a right to demand my time and attention, even when I want to be alone. They will still insist I be polite and cheerful, even while they make me uncomfortable and afraid. They will still comment about my body and allude to sexual violence, and then berate me for being “stuck up” if I don’t receive it with a sense of humor. They will still choose to reinforce their dominance with a reminder that they could hurt me if they wanted to, and that I should somehow be grateful if they don’t. This has made me defensive. It has put me more on my guard than I would like to be.”

-Laura Munoz