or is it just normal!cry

You don’t want to lose control over your life. You are afraid to rely on another human being, to make them your everything because you know they will betray you eventually. But the truth is the most beautiful things happen when you let go of your fears and live life like there is no tomorrow.
—  far-cry-from-normal, Just let go.

anonymous asked:

I'm feeling 62. (Please don't cry) really hard even though like 2 out of the 3 words are barely in Andrew or Neil's vocabulary

Okay so like I love this concept and I love this dialogue but…. Andrew doesn’t say please and Neil would never say please in front of Andrew, but……. I did my best
#62. “Please, don’t cry.”

Andrew’s sweatshirt is the only barrier between Neil’s skin and the biting December air. Where the metal of the balcony touches Neil’s bare thighs and feet, he freezes. Tears stick to his cheeks. The cold doesn’t register. Neil just feels the heat of a gasoline fire, smells flesh and hair and plastic burning. He can feel the resistance against his fingers when he rips his mother’s bones from the seat with blood acting as velcro.

The balcony door slides open and Andrew steps out. King slips past Andrew’s feet and trots over to Neil. The cat meows before stepping onto Neil’s thigh and head-butting his chest. Neil blinks, and more tears fall and freeze in place. Sir meows from the doorway and paces, but he won’t come outside. 

“Your cats are stupid,” Andrew says, sitting down crosslegged beside Neil. 

Neil doesn’t respond except to drag in a trembling breath. Andrew and the cats are peripheral to the last moments he has of his mother. Neil’s grief and exhaustion warp reality until the memory feels more real than the present moment. He’s not sitting on his balcony, remembering California, he’s on his knees on the side of the road, vomiting up the smell of ash and the taste of sea salt until his stomach is empty.

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Kiwi || Part Two.

 Well you asked for it. I hope you like part two as much as you all did part one. If you missed part one, you can read it Here. And as always let me know what you think and if you’d like to see more. 

When the door slammed and a car had driven away Anne and Gemma cautiously made their way back into the living room, neither of them prepared for what they were about to find. Harry was on the floor in front of the couch where you had left him not ten minutes earlier. His breathing was heavy and laboured, his sobs more like screams. Motherly instinct took over Anne as she slouched down to hold him close. This had been his first proper breakdown since he was a child. She had in fact never seen him this bad. She could never blame you though, this wasn’t your fault. She felt to blame for if it weren’t for her carelessness then he’d still be oblivious and everyone would still be happy.

Her motherly instincts worried for you also as well as her unborn grandchild. She instructed Gemma to find you and make sure you were okay, so off Gemma went in her car trying to catch up to you. After fifteen minutes his breathing returned to some kind of normal rate and his sobs which had filled the room were now far and few between. “I don’t want it..” It was the first time he’d spoken words since she had left. “Don’t want what harry?”

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And The Poets Are Just Kids Who Didn’t Make It

Written for NurseyWeek, prompt Mistake.

Trigger warning for a panic attack

Nursey wasn’t sure where his day had gone to shit. He’d thought it was fine, he had his English Lit class in the morning, which he actually enjoyed, then a poetry workshop early in the afternoon.  Somehow, however, it had got to be too much, and he’d practically sprinted out of his workshop to go to the Haus, hoping for a piece of pie and a Bitty hug. He’d apparently forgotten that Thursdays were when everyone had class in the late afternoon except for him, meaning that he was now alone with his thoughts, which never ended well when he got to be like this.

Dropping to the ground, Nursey leaned against the back of the couch and drew his knees into his chest, closing his eyes and trying to breathe against the overwhelming sensation of everything going on around him and bearing too much weight and too many responsibilities down on him and he wasn’t good enough to deal with any of this and why did he think he possibly could succeed in life and why was he such a fuckup and why was everything he did a mistake-

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anonymous asked:

My boyfriend is so upset about my transition to veganism meaning that we can't share every meal that he texted me upsetting things during my work day, then when I came home trying to hold myself together, he stormed out on me because I was "making things about myself" when I didn't immediately hug him, and I'm just. This isn't about veganism. I'm staying vegan. I just. Is this normal when transitioning? I can't stop crying. I feel worthless.

I’m so sorry love. Try and remember that it’s not your fault, when people act like that it’s their own personal issues they may have going on and they lack healthy coping mechanisms/communication skills - so they act like dicks to the people closest to them. Feels shitty though. You guys can still have meals together!!! and why’s it all about your transitioning that’s the problem? can’t he eat vegan sometimes (or all the time), too? Sorry you’re dealing with that but i’m proud of you for transitioning! be proud of yourself, too. Don’t let anyone ruin it. I wouldn’t say it’s normal, no. I’m a firm believer that if someone really respects you they would want you to better yourself or to see you happy even if they feel left out in some weird way (even though it doesn’t have to be like that). You’re not worthless sweetheart, stay excited about your positive life changes, it’s your life after all. It’ll all work out. (read the replies to this ask, there’s some important opinions I think you should read)

They Wanna Make Me Their Queen

( Prompt: princess diaries style “I grew up not knowing I was royal and suddenly my royal grandparent showed up out of nowhere and told me I was so now I guess I’m the heir to the throne and you’re my crush from my pre-royal days but I still have a crush on you” AU ) 

PART 4

A/N: Two words: Lip-sync battle. SLAY TOM, SLAY. I WAS WEIRDLY TURNED ON BY HIS PERFORMANCE?? LIKE. I WOULD DO HIM IN THE SUIT, AND I WOULD DO HIM IN DRAG, AND I AM CRYING. That being said, if anyone wants to fangirl with me over Tom, please hit me up. I need more friends to fangirl with!! ( I also need a date with him ASAP. ) In other news, this was very heavily influenced by that scene in Catching Fire. Matt Murdock, the dumpster ninja, will be showing up in a few more chapters, and I cannot wait. :)))

Taglist (temporary): @theactualscarletwitch | @moonlight53 | @intohook | @alaskayoung-x | @kubby14679 | @clean-and-claire | @fandoms-broke-my-life | @johnmurphys-sass |@queenofthelavalamps | @sharenaloveyoux | @mcheung0314 | @lionfart | @skorii

Taglist (permanent): @mainspidey | @x-wing-starwriter | @tomsleftbrow | @tryn25 |@tanglefire |@midnight-memorial | @tiny-friggin-human | @tacklemyackles | @fangeekkk | @beamagtuto | @captainaudreystark


You leave the room – and the after party – without delay. Your walk is more of a stagger as the amount of champagne you’ve consumed just minutes before becomes apparent. Too much. And yet, not nearly enough. You move as calmly as possible towards the archway leading to the hall … To escape.

Or as much of an escape as you can manage with a limitless number of guards keeping watch over your every move.

You press a hand against the wall to steady yourself. Once you find an exit to the balcony, you grasp hold of a railing and try to calm yourself. A sob rises in your throat. You clamp your lips together to force it back.

No one told you the life of a princess would be this hard.

No one told you that you would have to give up your friends.

No one told you that a crown could weigh so heavily upon your head.

“What’s a pretty girl like you doing in a place like this?” Light and good-humoured – not to mention vaguely familiar – a voice greets you from the shadows, you jarringly realise that you aren’t alone.

Normally, you would be thrilled – or shocked at the very least – to have New York’s very own Spiderman hanging from the fire escape only several feet away. It’s becoming a trend at school – all the girls are bragging about how Spiderman had saved them from robbers/harassment/bullying, and they’d proceeded to make out with Spiderman in some dark corner to ‘thank’ him.

And now he’s here. Real and alive. You could add on to the flood of wild stories, but you hardly need the added popularity. As it is, you could claim that you’d discovered Atlantis and people would believe you.

You manage a faint smile that comes across as more of a grimace on a pale and strained face that not even M.A.C and Elizabeth Arden can hide.

Willing your voice not to crack, you speak slowly, attempting to compose yourself, “Parties aren’t really my thing.”

“What is your thing, then?”

He’s talking to you like he’s known you all your life. It’s warm and familiar and comforting somehow, to be talked to like a normal human being. No, “Yes, Your Highness”, or “As you wish, My Lady”. No airs, no treading on eggshells. Just … Normal conversation. You could cry. You want to cry.

“I enjoy horseback riding and embroidery.” Your voice sounds dead, even to your ears – it sounds like something you’ve memorised from a textbook. “I volunteer at soup kitchens in my free time, and I donate generously to churches and shelters.”

“I mean the real things.” His gaze is heavy on your face, so piercing that you think he can see all the way down into your soul. “Not the princess things.”

“I like watching movies,” You say, softly, carefully, after making sure that your grandmother isn’t going to jump out of nowhere to chide you for not giving the appropriate response. “I always watched them with my best friend.” There’s a sour taste in your mouth, almost like curdled milk, when you remember that you haven’t been to Peter’s in weeks, and that you haven’t been speaking to him for about as long. Swallowing, you continue, “I like books. Reading. Listening to music. You know. Teenager stuff.”

“Teenager stuff,” He repeats. “So why are you saying that other stuff?”

You let out a half laugh that sounds more like a hysterical hiccup. “Don’t have much of a choice, do I?”

It’s what people want to hear. It’s what they expect from a princess. But your all your lies are piling up, one after another, and you’re afraid that soon they’ll collapse over you and will bury you under, and you won’t be able to climb out of the hole that you’ve dug yourself into.

“There’s always a choice.”

Not for me, you think, both angrily and wistfully. If you had any choice, you would abandon all your duties and run off to Antarctica to chill with the Penguins. You’d turn in your crown immediately. You’d become normal again. A regular girl, in a regular school, with a regular life.

You’d never thought you’d miss normalcy.

“You need a break.” Spiderman says, shaking his head in mock – or is it real? – disappointment. But then, his voice changes, takes on an edge of boyish excitement. “C’mon, let’s go!”

“Go?” You wag your head hysterically. “Oh no no no, I can’t just … Go.”

“It’s not like I’m taking you to Aspen. Just around the city.”

Spiderman’s looking at you hopefully, almost child-like in his excitement. He holds out a hand, and you stare at it, wanting to take it, but still, unable to. What’s the harm? A voice whispers. Tomorrow you’ll have to go back to your life. All the press, the attention, the loneliness …

“Okay.”

Your cheeks warm. This is like something from a fairy tale – you the princess, and Spiderman the unconventional knight. You take his hand. It’s surprisingly warm and firm, and your own hand feels like it was made to hold his.

You try to think past these unwanted thoughts.

“Hold on tight. Okay?”

Before you can respond, you feel hands on your waist, and Spiderman’s lifting you up carefully, gently into his arms. He’s skinny, but a lot stronger than he looks. You accidentally slide back against his chest, breathing in the scent that clings to his skin – something warm, like cinnamon, vanilla, and the night air. Your heart inches its way into your throat. You’ll admit that you’re unusually nervous, but you chalk it up to being near to Spiderman. One breath is all you get the chance for though; he runs up to the edge of the roof and leaps right off it.

A loud scream escapes your lips. Your stomach plunges into a freefall, and your arms, once hanging limply at your side, now fly to wrap around Spiderman’s neck. You’re not sure if you’re strangling him with how tight you’re grabbing onto him, but right now, the only thought on your mind is holding on so that you don’t become a spot on the pavement.

You make a mental note to add ‘heights’ to the list of things you aren’t good at.

He has to shout to be heard over the cars honking, and the wind rushing by. “C’mon, open your eyes!”

“You’re crazy!” You squeak, praying that you won’t throw up all over his shiny new suit. “This was a bad idea!”

“I’m not going to drop you. You’ll be safe with me, I promise.”

It’s hard to doubt the sincerity that rings true in his voice, but still, you glare suspiciously at the direction of his voice before opening your eyes.

Your breath catches in your throat. Wow. It looks absolutely stunning. New York at night, from the sky … It looks otherworldly, surreal. To your surprise, a laugh bubbles forth from you. Your hair streams back from your face, and a smile makes its way across your face. You’ve grown used to the strange, but not all together unpleasant feeling, of being weightless and free and infinite, of flying through the air.

You could get used to this.

“I – I, uh, saw the press conference.”

It’s the wrong thing to say.

Your mood had been rapidly improving, but now, the weight of all your mistakes comes crashing back down, hard, onto your shoulders. You’ve been teetering on the edge of tears all day, and this is all it takes for you to break down completely.

You cry Peter’s name.

And then you just cry.

His name, Ned’s name, Michelle’s name, in one desperate stream of sounds that you can’t separate from one another. You want someone to make things right; you want someone to make you not feel as if you’re constantly being pulled different ways by your heart and your head. Most of all, you want someone to tell you that everything will be alright; to promise that your friends won’t be hating you with every fibre of their beings.

Shit shit shit,” Spiderman’s saying from somewhere far away, panic and fear vibrating through those three words. “I said something wrong.”

Vaguely, you’re aware that the crisp night winds have stopped rifling through your hair, aware that you’re no longer flying through the air, have the vague sensation of being set down gently onto gravel. The cold and the damp press against your legs.

“My friends hate me,” You sob, scrubbing at your streaming eyes with the back of your hand. “My crush hates me. I said some things that I didn’t mean just now.”

Through the tears that blur your vision, Spiderman freezes, goes impossibly still, like a deer caught in the headlights. “Then why did you?” He asks softly.

“Because – Because I wanted to keep them safe,” You confess. Your throat aches as a horrible black ball of fear lodges itself under the roof of your mouth. “This – The Princess job isn’t safe, there are horrible people who want me dead, and if they manage to get to my friends, I wouldn’t be able to live with myself.”

“I get it.” Spiderman says, just as quietly, his voice suddenly sounding heavy and weary. “Believe me, I do.”

“No, you don’t!” You cry. It explodes out of you before you can stop it. You don’t know why you’re suddenly so angry, but you could shake him or cry. “You have no idea – No one does – I thought this would be fun, but it’s not! It hurts, it hurts, it hurts, and I’m in over my head, and I just want my friends back, but I can’t have them, and I just … I don’t know what to do anymore.”

The tears come in a flash flood. Exhaustion and self-pity roll over you. You’re sobbing even harder now, hunched over, and trembling in pain and sorrow and grief, with barely a pause to breathe as your frame is racked with the release of so many built-up emotions.

You think Spiderman’s left, but suddenly he’s holding you, warm and reassuring and real. You find yourself with your head buried in his shoulder, sobbing. He lets you cry it out, keeping you pressed tightly to him, and he’s making little noises into your hair, sounding positively pained that you’re miserable and he can’t do anything to help.

“I’ll take you home, okay?” He asks, once you’ve stopped crying.

All you can do is nod, still keeping your face buried into his neck.

He carries you into your room, through the window. He helps you to wash your makeup off, waits as you change out of your dress, helps you into bed, smoothing the covers over your still-trembling frame. Spiderman says goodnight, but you catch his hand and hold him there. You don’t want him to go, especially not when you feel so awful.

“Stay with me,” You whisper plaintively, like a small child. “Stay. Please.”

Fingers ghost through your hair, and you think you feel the brush of lips against your forehead. You think you hear Spiderman whisper a word back, but you’re too far gone to make it out.

I normally don’t post pics of me crying just the usually selfie. However today is different because today you guys showed me how much you care about me and my transition and want to see me succeed. I am eternally grateful and don’t know where I would be without you guys! I feel like thank you isn’t enough but thank you all so much and I love you.

So this is inspired this adorable art of Kylo holding his baby by @jeusus. I fell in love with it instantly. 

Their quarters used to be relatively peaceful. Ren worked easily alongside Hux when it was just the two of them. They planned upcoming battles and proofread each other’s reports during their sporadic caf breaks. They wouldn’t be bothered to go to bed so they’d fuck on the couch. If it was early enough they’d force themselves to stay up with more caf and cold showers. Unless they were fighting, it was quiet and straightforward. 

That was all before their screaming bundle of joy. 

Quinn cried a lot. Loud and shrill, demanding attention they couldn’t always give him. After consulting with one of the doctors on the ship, they found out their child was crying a normal amount. They were both just irritated easy. 

As soon as Ren stepped into their quarters, his attention was immediately drawn to Hux bouncing Quinn in his arms while he stood at his desk. 

“If you don’t stop this, darling, I’ll put you to bed and call back your damn nanny droid." 

The child wailed and whined while Hux shushed him. The general’s lip curled and his brow twitched but he never once lost his patience with Quinn. 

"Has he been up all night?" 

Hux didn’t turn from his holoscreens. "The little shit won’t sleep. Can you heat up a bottle for him?" 

"Can I get through the fucking door first?” Ren leant against the arm of the couch and shed his boots. He peeled off his gloves on the way to the kitchenette and tossed them on their two-person table that was covered in caf mugs and baby bottles. He took a fresh bottle from the conservator. They had a small appliance designed especially for heating bottles of milk. Ren truly didn’t understand why they needed all of this but then they had a child who fussed if the milk was too cool. 

While that was heating, Ren came over to Hux and received an armful of their son. 

“Here." 

Quinn wriggled in his arms but he wasn’t throwing a fit anymore. Ren sat on the couch, dipping his head, plush lips kissing the crown of Quinn’s hair. He was overly conscious of how gentle he was trying to be. The infant was dwarfed in his hands, swallowed up completely. Ren could barely do the buttons up on his onesies. 

Quinn shoves his little fingers in his mouth and stared up at Ren. He kicked his legs and Ren arched a brow. "What’s gotten you into such a mood, hm?" 

He didn’t receive an answer. He and Hux had this habit of taking to Quinn like he understood them. They both despise baby talk. 

"He missed you,” Hux said, crossing the room to fetch Quinn’s bottle. “Typical. He stops crying when you’re back." 

"I’m his favourite." 

Hux came to Ren with the warmed bottle and joined him on the couch. "He likes you because you’re warm.” He slung his arm around Ren’s middle and rested his head on his shoulder. 

Ren shifted Quinn into the crook of his arm, more careful than ever with Hux watching him. Quinn pulled his spit-slick fingers from his mouth and slapped them on Ren’s chest. 

“What was that for?” Ren murmured, nudging the bottle against the infant’s lips. Quinn opened his mouth and let out an impatient little whine before sucking on the rubber top. 

Silence. 

“Finally,” Hux said, face half-hidden in Ren’s cowl. 

“Weren’t you working?" 

"You’re the one who tells me to take more breaks." 

Ren’s lips tugged up. "After his bottle, we’ll put him to bed so I’ll make sure you fully enjoy your break." 

"That’s if he falls asleep." 

"We’ll make it work." 

Hux stifled a yawn against Ren’s shoulder. "That would be nice…" 

Ren didn’t reply. After a minute or so Hux’s breathing even out and his arm around Ren loosened. Ren obviously wasn’t getting up anytime soon. He drew Quinn close to his chest and let his head fall against Hux’s.

Today, my assistant spilled coffee on me. They were walking down the hallway, not watching where they were going, and ran straight into me.

I don’t think they ever intended to be that close to me. Well, unluckily for them, they got to get even closer after I dragged them into the broom closet and swallowed them whole.

They’re putting up quite the fight. It’s refreshing. Normally, my meals just break down crying and curl up into a ball. Not this one. They’re indignantly shouting and kicking and squirming as much as they can and it feels great.

I wish all of my lunches were more like them.

But now I’ve got a problem. I’m in the broom closet with a gut full of squirmy prey, and I need to get back to my office without anyone noticing.

Ugh.

Nightmare

Seth Rollins/OC: You have a terrible nightmare and the first person you can think of to call is your ex while you’re crying and hoping he can help cheer you up. Fluff then smut. Requested by @screamersdontdance

I wrote another request!!! It’s lit! But I have more Braun ideas so the next couple may be Braun again. Idk yet tho, we’ll see.

Tagging my lovelies: @lavitabella87 @omgmissmillie @everybodyfinnfreeze @shadow-of-wonder @laochbaineann @justtookawaii @sarrahcha @attilasgurl @twiistedbliiss @hotspurmadridista @alexispoo @niazha16 @happelu970 @officialbroski10-blog @artemisapalla316 @crowleysqueenofhell @lilmisscrisis @antigonemaia @imnoaingeal @littledeadrottinghood @imagineall-the-fandoms @fuckyeahbulletclub @hiitsmecharlie @macfizzle @bizclizbaybay @oraclegazes @culturalrebel @welshwitch5 @wrasslesmut @actualamyautopsy

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Birth and Bloodletting: a Feysand Pregnacy: Part Seven

I, II, III, IV, V, VI

Feyre’s face smoothed out in sleep. Her skin still a bit pale but she was healed. With the twins in his arms, Rhys crept out of the room and into the Nursery.

The chair in the corner, the ebony cribs, the threadbare rug stretching across the cherry floor; the nursery was worn and warm and meant to be lived in and he planned on doing just that.

Putting his children in their cribs, Rhys slid out of the room. He needed to find Azriel and Cassian. Keir needed to be taken care of once and for all. He would not forgive the attempt on his children or his mate’s life. He was going to enjoy taking him apart.

He found them in the study, with Nate and Ash.

He leaned against the wall, crossing his arms. “What’s going on?”

Cassian ignored him. “Look. Nate, more than anyone, I want him to sleep. But if you two idiots try to force Bay to sleep and then he wakes up, he will kill you. You do realize this, yes?” Cassian crossed his arms. “Between being locked in his nightmares,” his eyes flicked to Ash, “And you using your magic on him right after promising not to and you being hurt already, when he wakes up, he will kill both of you.”

Ouch.

Nate crossed his arms, “You have a better idea? The lack of sleep and grieving is driving him suicidal.” He told them what Bay said to him. Ash getting himself killed saving Bay, it would make the guilt so profound he couldn’t live with himself.

Cassian’s jaw clenched. “Let’s go.”

As they left, Rhys sat next to Azriel. Aysel started to crawl to him in her crimson footed pajamas. Picking her up, Aysel stood on his knees, her fingers pulling at his hair.

He winced at tiny nails digging into his scalp. “Isn’t she supposed to be asleep?”

Azriel shrugged, “She know’s something is wrong.”

“Speaking of something wrong,” Rhys said, pulling her down from his shoulder. “Where are we on Keir?”

Nuella and Ceridwen are out looking for him. As are my other spies. We can’t completely trust he would use magic. He’s old and would know we have his magic traced. We’ll find him and find out what he knows about the coup.” Azriel’s shadows twisted around him, darkening. His voice was a whisper of darkness, honed and lethal. “And then I find out what he did to my son.”

————-

He was tired, but he couldn’t sleep. He wasn’t sure if he was keeping himself awake to stay away from the nightmares or if he truly couldn’t sleep. He hadn’t had this bad of an episode for a while. In fact, with Nate sleeping next to him the nightmares tended to not come. Instead he slept peacefully. But this past week had been brutal, this day the eleventh anniversary of his mother’s death, it still felt incredibly raw.

The day after spending two weeks getting back to her just to find her dead in her bed. The day he tried to break into the still frozen ground so he could bury her properly but failed. The day he tried to get people to help him put her to rest. It haunted him, imprinted on the lids of his eyes.

He palmed his eyes before looking up. He froze. Cassian, Nate and Ash stood in formation, blocking the door. Their faces were set in grim lines and their arns crossed.

“No,” his voice cracked. “Don’t.” Ash was hurt. He was still healing and- he looked at Ash, “You promised.” His friend’s jaw was clenched, his eyes betrayed nothing else.

“You need sleep,” Cassian said. “Are you going to fight us?”

Bay narrowed his brows, “It isn’t a fair fight, now is it?” He knew he could take Ash down, and injure Nate, but Cassian, he would be as good as dead. And he was sleep deprived. They could best him.

Nate winced. Good.

Cassian leveled a stare, “I know you have nightmares, Bay. I do too. I see Nesta dying over and over again. I see Cass dying. I see you spiraling and I can’t stop it. But I still sleep. If I went without sleep with the life I have, you and Aysel would be parentless. You need to sleep before I lose another child.”

“I am not your child,” he said. Cassian blinked. “I am not your blood.” He didn’t have any blood left. He just had himself.  “I am a charity case and I will not let Ash get himself hurt helping me.” He stood despite the dizziness in his head. Ash had to touch him in order to drop his heartbeat. “I am not worth his life.”

————


Bay’s blood pressure spiked. Ash knew he was pissed and sleep deprived and was ready to fight his way out of the townhouse. If only so he didn’t force him asleep. But in this state, Bay was weak and couldn’t best them.

Cassian and Nate acted. Bay managed to hit Cassian’s jaw before they could succeed in restraining him. They locked their hands around Bay’s arms and legs, keeping him flesh against the mattress.

“Get off me,” Bay growled.

“Let him help you,” Nate gritted out.

“Fuck you,” Bay snarled, trying to edge out of Nate’s grip.

“You’ll thank me when you wake up.”

“No, I’ll kill you when I wake up.” He couldn’t tell if Bay was lying.

Ash got up onto the bed, his hand pressed to Bay’s sternum. Bay’s heart thudded beneath his fingers, his chest vibrating from growling.

“Don’t,” Bay said. His magic slid around Bay’s heart, slowing it. Bay’s eyes fluttered. “Stop.”

————–

Rhys rubbed Aysel’s back. The Princess’s cries vibrated around his mind. Rhys looked to Azriel. The male’s eyes were narrowed, his shadows twisted around him. “Why won’t she stop?”

“Give it a few minutes,” Az said quietly. “My guess is she’s picking up on the fight between Bay and the others.”

Rhys grimaced, “How does Bay deal with these cries in his head all the time?” It wasn’t a normal cry, nor Daemati. Aysel was different, just like her mother. And fuck was she loud.

Azriel shrugged, “Nate says he gets up and puts her back to sleep or gets Cassian.”

The cries slowed to a stop and Rhys tipped his head back, “Thank the Cauldron.”

Ceridwen and Nuella appeared. The twins inclined their head to him and turned to Azriel. “We found him.”

Azriel stood, his shadows twisting around him and onto the floor. Aysel squealed at them. Rhys wrapped his arm around her, keeping her from falling off his knee. Azriel turned to him. “Would you like me to begin?”

“Bring him in and wait for me.”

Azriel nodded before leaving. He was going to get his answers one way or another.
————-

Cassian released Bay’s arm. Bay was asleep; Ash slowly removed his hand from Bay’s chest and climbed from down off Nate’s bed with shaky limbs.

“He is going to kill us,” Ash said, wearily. “Not metaphorically, literally.” Ash gripped one of the columns to the bed and shook his head, his free hand palming his eyes. “I am going to pass out.”

“Nate, help Ash to his rooms.” Nate opened his mouth to argue. “Now, Nate. I’ll stay with him.”

Nate wrapped Ash’s arm around his shoulder and near dragged him out of the room. Cassian sat next to Bay and examined his face. Flushed red and tear tracks. The betrayal and anger smoothed out by sleep. It made him look younger. Reminded him of the petrified eight year old that Ash brought to him.

Three days of sleep deprivation made Bay snap at him. ‘Not your son, not your blood.’ Bay had made himself a separate person from the family for a long time, always prepared to be cast out. He could be surrounded by people and still feel alone. He knew the feeling, still hurt though.

Cassian brushed back Bay’s bangs. He didn’t move. He hoped Bay was so far deep he wasn’t dreaming.

“I’m so sorry, Bay.” He whispered. “I”ve been so busy with everything that I forgot you. You were breaking and I forgot you.” He tried to make time to talk to Bay, especially the last few days, but with Keir and Feyre and Aysel and being King and a Commander…He let his son fall through the cracks and didn’t realize how bad it was until Nate got him.

——

Ash slid into the bed. His head was static, luckily Bay was already tired and didn’t require much use of magic, even if he fought through it. “Nate, I know you love him but we really should not have done that. He will not forgive or forget this violation.”

“I know,” Nate whispered. “But we had to.”

“It’s been years but, I can heal nightmares. I healed Father’s. But after today, Bay will let me nowhere near him ever again. We broke his trust.” Healing his nightmares required Bay to let him into his subconscious. After this, he would never let him near him again.

Nate sighed, “How long will he stay asleep?”

“A while,” Ash said. “Probably close to a full day.” Ash inclined his head, “You aren’t going anywhere are you?” He had wondered if his cousin’s interest in Bay was just infatuation. He was beginning to realize it was much, much more than that.

Nate ignored the question. “Will he dream?”

“I don’t know. Cauldron, I hope not. I think I put him under deep enough it should be dreamless.” He didn’t know much about Bay’s dreams, only that they were about his mother. Only Cassian and Nate know anything about her. Ash had asked only for Bay to shut him down each time.

“Thank you, Ash. For helping him and Feyre.” Nate paused at the door. “And me.”

Ash blinked. “No problem. ”

He passed out before he hit the pillow.

———–

Nate ran a hand through his hair while walking down the hall. They had gotten Baylor asleep, but the way they did it, he wondered if he destroyed their relationship. He wondered what Baylor would do when he woke up. Something told him it wasn’t going to be pretty.

His father was coming out of the study, his eyes dark, his shadows darker, twisting around him.

His father studied him. “Are you alright?”

“Yes, sir.” Nate lied. “Where are you going?”

“We found Keir.”

Keir was going to tell his father everything that they did to him. Nate knew it. He didn’t want his father to know, didn’t want anyone to know. He had buried the past and just wanted to kill Keir and be done with it.

“Do you want to come?” Azriel asked quietly.

Yes he did. “How long do you need him alive for?”

“Until we get every last last piece of information from him. A week at least.”

“I’ll come later,” Nate said. “After Baylor wakes up. He has his own questions.” When his father was finished, he and Bay would bring in Cyrian. They were getting their own answers one way or the other. And taunting Baylor with his father, that was a fatal mistake.

“He’ll forgive you,” his father said.

“He wants to kill me,” Nate said. He sighed, “I really hope I didn’t just destroy my relationship.”

“You didn’t. Once he’s had sleep his mind will start working again and realize you both did what you thought was best.” Rhys came out with Aysel, the princess was sleeping on his shoulder, her face dug into his shirt. “But if it makes you feel better, Feyre wanted to kill me too. She didn’t.”

“Yeah,” Nate said. “But she’s your mate. She couldn’t kill you if she wanted to.”

Rhys and his father met each other’s eyes. Nate frowned.

“It’ll be alright,” his father said. “Go check on him. Tell Cassian we found him.”

———

Keir had made it to the border before being caught. Azriel stood in front of him. His face cold and unyielding. His siphons glowed and arms crossed. The moon casted unforgiving shadows across his face, its darkness mixing with his shadows.

“Hello, Keir.”

—————

I was just going to have this as the conclusion but im not satisfied with it ending like this  so there will be more parts. 

 Here you go!! Thank you for reading!! Please leave a comment XO

normalize crying in public! maybe i just wanna let out some ghibli tears in this ikea, idk u don’t know my life! catch me crying between some lamps

Why do some people love to overreact so much? “Jimin took JK hand off his shoulder, they must be fighting”, “ JM is in a bad mood”, “JM rejected JK”.

Jimin is just more cautious about showing their closeness on public, and he probably thinks of “ hand on the shoulder” as of most obvious form of close skinship, so he gives JK signs to behave.

In today’s interview they were both smiling after JM took JK’s hand off, you can actually see, that there’s nothing bad going on between them, and JM is not angry.

Also he often likes to tease JK a bit, and JK likes being teased. You can see examples in some “21st century girls” performances, where JM jokingly “rejects” JK. They are both smiling and looking happy after that.

Of course, there might be real fights between them, it’s normal, they are just people. But there’s no need to cry that they “fighting” and “JM doesn’t love JK anymore”, when it’s obviously not like that.

Please help Mark see this...

Hi, Mark. I’m the developer of “Black Rose” “Captured”, and “Otherworld Hospital”, and I’ve been a long-time subscriber and fan of you, ever since your early days of ’Let’s Playing’. You help me with my depression, and you help me feel like I have friends, even though I’ve never actually met you or the gang (I’d be too nervous to, anyway). You help me feel like I’m somewhat normal. Even though I just sit here and cry sometimes, you always make me laugh.

Seeing you play my games helps motivate me to keep developing them and get better at it, as becoming a successful, appreciated game developer has been my entire life dream since I was very young. It’s been a long journey or depression, anxiety, devastation, humiliation, isolation, lack of motivation, and sadness, but you help me press on.

I can only hope that maybe, possibly, if I get lucky, you just might see this. I’m getting emotional now even just typing this out, it’s just that you’ve helped me so much in ways that many people can’t see or understand.

So, thank you. Even though it’s hard, I will keep trying the best I can.

Imagine

As the prince of the underworld Tom always has to have a strong reputation. He can’t show any signs of weakness, or any signs of vulnerability. He always has to be this strong character and it got to the point that he refuses to let himself show emotion sometimes.
But Marco’s always there to tell Tom it’s okay, and his feelings are normal and if sometimes he just wants to cry, Marco will let him and just hold him through it.

Thunder

Alex is afraid of thunderstorms, Maggie remembers. Alex was asleep until the loud crash of thunder awoke her. A bright bolt of lightning followed. “Shit” she mumbled. She was never scared of thunderstorms until the night she found out her dad died. It wasn’t about the noise, it was about the memories. She could handle guns, explosions, and all that stuff but she couldn’t handle thunderstorms. ~~~~~~~~ It was just after dinner when her mom got the call. It had been raining all day but finally turned into a thunderstorm. Her and Kara were cleaning up the table like usual. When her mother came in and told them. ~~~~~~~~ And ever since then Alex has been terrified of thunderstorms, even as a grown woman. Alex had never told anyone, she would normally just sit alone in her apartment wrapped in a blanket crying. She had finally told someone. But it was only because they both promised to be truthful. Alex and Maggie were playing a game of 20 questions when Maggie asked Alex something she’s afraid of and Alex was about to lie and say something else but it was Maggie, it was her girlfriend who she promised she would be truthful to. So Alex told her. And they just went on with the game. Alex thought Maggie forgot about it until she heard keys in the door. ~~~~~~~~ Maggie woke up from the thunder normally, she would have just turned over and went back to sleep but she remembered. She remembered what Alex told her. And there was no way she would be letting her girlfriend be alone in her apartment scared. So she got out of bed, threw a hoodie over her t-shirt, slipped on some shoes and went to Alex’s apartment. She didn’t bother knocking when she got there, Alex gave her a key for a reason. She unlocked the door and walked in to find her girlfriend looking up at her sitting on the couch wrapped in a blanket crying. She ran over and wrapped her arms around Alex “hey, hey, hey… I’m here your okay.” She soothed her girlfriend. “You remembered” Alex said in a weak low voice “Of course I did. Come on let’s go to bed.” Maggie responded. Alex buried her head in Maggie’s neck she didn’t want to get up and the shorter woman knew that so she used the only thing she could think of to convince her. She kissed Alex’s head and said “We could cuddle and be more comfortable.” And that’s when got Alex up. ~~~~~~~~ Maggie and Alex layed together in Alex’s bed wrapped in each other’s arms. Alex had actually got some sleep that night despite the thunderstorm.

Nature

G.D

Warning: Nothing but fluff. 

Summary: A trip to Los Angeles is going amazing for Y/N, until she’s too entranced by nature, breaks a bone, and there’s seemingly no one to help her. 

Grayson’s POV

I sat across from Ethan, as he was enthusiastically telling me a story about how he fell down a flight of stairs and got a sick scratch from it. Normally, I’d be excited. Normally

We sat in this cafe, a random one Ethan happened to find with aesthetically pleasing decor, so we decided on breakfast here. In my line of sight, just behind him, a girl sat by herself. I held my breath slightly, a wave of warmth flashing through me and I felt nervous. All I’m doing is looking at her. Her hair shining as the sunlight caught it perfectly. She was engrossed in her book, I could see from here, Pride & Prejudice. 

“Are you even listening?! Hello– Oohh…" 

Keep reading

Jughead Jones x reader

He was dead.
Jason Blossom was actually dead.
The thing you had always wished for actually came true, except for the fact that you never actually WANTED for it to happen.
You only wished for that, because him and his sister Cheryl were always picking on you like you were the only person there.
Ever since Jason’s body was found, everybody was talking about it, there was basically no other topic then that.
And whenever you wanted to talk to someone about how you felt, there was basically no one.
Your brother Archie was always gone, and you never had any real friends, you were always known for being this weirdo girl without any friends, the only people that you ever hung out with were your brothers friends, but you stopped doing that, because you didn’t want to bother them, since they were older then you and they went into another year then you did.
After it was official that Jason was dead he started haunting you in your dreams saying that it was your fault that he died because you wished for that to happen.
You always woke up in the middle of the night with tears running down your face because you were so scared, but you didn’t want to wake your father and your brother was always out to meet up with someone you apparently didn’t know.
_______________________________________________________________________
It was 4 am and you were sitting on your bed crying and you weren’t able to stop.
You stood up and walked out of your room to get something to drink.
On your way to the kitchen you walked past your fathers room and saw him sleeping peacefully.
Your brother was not at home which was normal these days, so you just went back to bed, crying your self to sleep.
The next time you woke up was at 7 am, so you decided to just get ready for school, even though you knew that you were not okay, you still left, because you knew if you didn’t go, people would start asking questions which you didn’t want to answer.
_______________________________________________________________________
Everything went fine until you had your lunch break.

You were sitting alone at a table, trying to be invisible, when you suddenly saw Jason standing in front of you saying the same things that he said in your dreams.
You were shocked because that had never happened before and you didn’t know what to do, so you just tried to ignore him but he wouldn’t go away.
After what felt like forever, you started to cry because you couldn’t handle it anymore so you ran out of the cafeteria past a few people, you didn’t stop running until you reached the doors that would take you to the car park, where you were hoping to be alone.
For the first 2 minutes you were, but then you heard somebody saying your name so you turned around to see that the person who said your name was Jughead Jones who used to be friends with your brother Archie.
You didn’t respond straight away so he said your name again.
„What?“ you asked.
„I thought I saw you crying when you came out of the cafeteria“
„Nah, you must have been hallucinating“ you said, trying to laugh it of.
„You do realise that I know you for a very long time don’t you?“
„Yes, I do“
„Then tell me whats wrong“
After he asked you for another 3 times, you finally had the courage to tell him everything, about your Nightmares and your wish of Jason being dead, of you feeling very alone and missing your brother.
When you finished telling him everything, he looked at you with a sad face, and he tried to help you.
He also said that you could always call him if you needed someone to talk to, which you did that night, because you had another nightmare.
After the first ring he picked up and you talked until you fell asleep again.
This went on for 2 weeks, and you and Jughead grew really close, you became best friends, Jughead always listened to your problems and you were helping him a bit with his novel, so that it wouldn’t be too complicated for the readers.
One night you even stayed at Jugheads house, because you knew that you would be alone that night.
Your dad told you, that he wouldn’t be home and your brother didn’t even bother telling you, because he was never there anyways, so it didn’t matter.

1 week later, the principle said, that everyone should go into the gym because the Police wanted to have the students, teachers and parents, who had to be there because some of us weren’t old enough, in one place, so that he could interrogate them.
Everything was going well, you put your fake smile on, standing next to your dad and your brother, like you were supposed to.
Suddenly you couldn’t breath anymore and you thought you would suffocate.
You ran to the door and tried to open it but it was locked, at that point your eyes met the ones of Jughead and he immediately knew that you were having a panic attack and he tried to make his way through the crowd to get to you.
When he finally reached you, you had already caught the attention of everybody else, and everyone was staring at you, waiting for something to happen.
You fell down to the floor, because your legs couldn’t handle your weight at that point.
Jughead sat down in front of you and tried to calm you down and at the same time he tried to explain to your dad and your brother what was happening right now.
As Jughead realised that his method didn’t work like it did last time, he grabbed your face, came closer to you and placed his lips on yours.
When he realised that your breathing was back to normal, he pulled away and asked whether everything was okay now.
„Why did you do that?“ you asked him.
„I once read somewhere that you have to stop breathing so that everything goes back to normal“
„So you just kissed me?“
„Well you did stop breathing“ he said with a smirk.
Before you could continue talking, Archie and your dad came to you asking if everything was okay now.
The principle came to you and told Archie that you, Dad, Jughead and him can go outside now to talk, so you did.
Jughead and you explained everything and Archie promised to be there for you in the future.
After you talked you decided to head home, but Jughead wanted to stay because of the novel he was writing.
As you wanted to say goodbye, he pulled you closer to him and kissed you again, but this time it was more passionate. You kissed him back.
He pulled away and started to speak 

„I didn’t just kiss you because of the panic attack y/n“

„I guessed, and for the record I really like you too“ and with that you turned around and walked to your dads car, leaving Jughead Jones smiling.