The problem with all the adulation over that single statement from Stefan in support of DE and the outpouring of hate for Damon is that people are forgetting all the times Damon stood up for Stefan, defended his behavior to Elena, pushed SE back to together, tried to find/help Stefan, offer comfort to Stefan when SE broke up, etc. I guess the SE fandom just has a very limited attention span or very short memories.
Okay, anon. You have my attention.
When exactly was Damon standing up for Stefan and defending him? And to who? Elena? Most of the time Stefan didn’t need anyone to stand up for him because he and Elena were usually on the same page. And when they weren’t, they worked it out. I saw more of Damon complaining about Stefan’s choices, and lifestyle, not ‘pimping’ it out and glorifying it. I’m not saying there’s no dialogue in existence that shows Damon ‘defending’ Stefan. I’m just trying to figure out the ones that actually matter. Are we talking about season 3 and 4? I feel that we must be.
But let’s talk about season 3. I understand that he decided to help get Stefan back, And he probably knew that it was going to result in the reunion of Stefan and Elena. But does he really just accept that? No. No he doesn’t, He’s not going to help get Stefan back without a price. Who knows, maybe in Damon’s head he thought it was justified. Who chooses to save him and leave Elena behind? A crazy madman undeserving of her love? Actually I believe he called him an insufferable martyr that needed his ass kicked. But it’s not easy for me to give over Damon points for any of that because, like I said, it wasn’t without a price. He wasn’t just going to go quietly into the night. ‘Because when I deliver my brother back to you, I want you to remember the things you felt while he was gone.’
The bitch of it is that Damon knew exactly what he was doing. When he found out the reason Stefan ‘screwed them over’ he says ‘When are you gonna learn? Stop saving me!’ Complete with a stab to the gut, and a swift move on Elena later that night. It was almost like he just couldn’t help himself. And it’s almost heartbreaking how easily Damon manipulated Stefan when Stefan ‘dared’ be upset over the kiss. ‘Just remember, if it weren’t for Klaus, you wouldn’t have become such a dick and that kiss would never have happened.’And his face afterwards, almost softens. You have to remember that Elena told Stefan she kissed Damon. I understand that it was her way of taking responsibility for not stopping it. But she didn’t actually kiss him. She didn’t make that move. Damon did. All on his own. Elena just stood on that porch not doing a damn thing. Damon was the one who had to make all the moves there. And he doesn’t take any responsibility in it at all. He puts it all on Klaus, and even on Stefan. Damon behaves as though he didn’t have a choice but to be an awful brother because that’s what everyone would expect.
It kills me that Stefan was pushing Elena away because he hated himself. 'I hate myself for what I did to you…’ Journal entry:….’Wallow in self-loathing.’But doesn’t Damon know this about Stefan? Doesn’t he know that this is what Stefan does? Season one: 'You know he’s just being dramatic. He’s not actually going to starve himself. He feels bad about hurting that girl. It’s very typical Stefan martyr stuff. It will pass.’Damon knew. He just cared more about getting something he wanted by taking advantage of Stefan’s shortcomings. But how else do you think Stefan knows how Damon feels right now? Because he actually fucking knows.Damon wasn’t pushing for Stefan and Elena to get back together. He just backed off when Elena rejected him.'I tried to win her from you fair and square. She didn’t want me.’ And if memory serves me correctly, I believe that Stefan gave Elena and Damon a fair chance in the end. And that’s a mighty fine gesture on Stefan’s part considering he could have had Elena melting in his arms again like butter on a hot muffin.
Damon offered no comfort to Stefan during the break up in season 4. Are you talking about this? 'Or we can just blow it off and get drunk, brother bond over some tri-delts, if you know—you want some quality time?’ I mean, what can I say? Did Damon feel a little bad for him? Maybe. But not bad enough. Stefan says he’d rather not pretend that this wasn’t the best day of Damon’s life. Turns out—he was right to think so. ‘I’d say I’m sorry, but I’m not.’ And then proceeds to jump right into bed with Elena before the SE relationship was even cold. Ugh. Excuse me while I gag. Yes, much comfort on Damon’s part. And it gets me every time that Damon delivers sentiments at just the right time so that Stefan believes in him, trusts him. Just to get shafted in the end. 'Damon does love Elena, and now he has to completely let her go. I mean, Imagine having to do that?’ 'He’s not as bad as he wants you to think.’ 'He’ll do it. He told me he would.’ 'I think he loves her as much as I do, and he can’t be selfish with her. Not anymore.’ But who can forget, ‘I’m not happy about Elena. But I’m not not happy for you either.’
There’s nothing wrong with my memory. And my attention span is just fine. We just appreciate that Stefan is trying to take the high road. It doesn’t mean that Stefan doesn’t have selfish thoughts,feelings, and temptations. It’s just that he chooses to behave otherwise. And we can’t help it if that makes Damon look shitty in comparison.