or if he aims for the crotch

In today’s episode of ‘Let’s Explore That Scene’, let’s look at the infamous ‘Foolish/You’ve fallen victim to the ol’ razzle dazzle’ scene in the Hiruzen vs Orochimaru fight in early Naruto. You know the one. I just re-watched it and am more baffled by the whole leg in the air thing??! Check out the fight right before:

The last frame of that is:

The next time we see Orochi is here:

Close-up:

And then the next time we see him, his leg is still up??:

Leading to the unnecessary razzle dazzle:


also think of where he’s aiming that crotch-shot…

Operation: Fragile Stiles

Based on this prompt: Stiles puts bells on all the wolves and Derek still manages to not make a sound. 1370w



It all comes to a head when Erica decides to leap out at him from beside a vending machine and he flails so hard his fingers cramp on the tab of his newly purchased can of coke. He makes a leap of his own, backwards, and gets drenched in a fizzy spray as his head smacks against the vending machine’s glass and sends something clattering down inside. It’s his third Operation: Fragile Stiles mishap of the week and there are still six days to go.

He splutters as the sticky drizzle runs down his face, his anger initially dampened by the acknowledgement that at least it wasn’t aimed at his crotch this time, until he realises he shouldn’t have even reached the stage of making concessions in the first place.

Erica doesn’t seem to see the problem. She bends down to retrieve the Butterfinger that somersaulted over the coil inside the machine with help from the impact of his skull and throws him a victorious grin as she skips away.

He’s had it with this game he never agreed to play. He’s sick of being the only human who has to put up with this shit, the constant shaving of years from his life as he watches over his shoulder for the next wolfy surprise. Allison might know her way around a bow and arrow and Lydia might have her acid tongue for a deterrent, but Stiles has… weapons. He does.

It’s Isaac’s snigger and Jackson’s curling lip that do it.

Keep reading

He won't be walking that off

So I was in a Savage Star Wars campaign. Our party was trying to get some information out of a Trandoshan outlaw, so we had to hurt him in to talking without actually killing him. Our Bith healer had just succeeded his role to see if he knew where the Trandoshan… uh… “stuff” is. I, being a cold blooded droid, decided to put two and two together.

GM: Trandoshans are humanoid, so their junk is between the legs, as normal.

Me: Alright then. I raise my carbine rifle, aim it at his crotch, and fire.

GM: *takes a moment to finish laughing* Alright then. Roll.

Me: *Rolls very well*

GM: Alright that hits. Roll damage.

Me: *Gets a very good roll*

*the entire table starts laughing*

Gm: You fire directly into the Trandoshan’s crotch. He pauses a moment, looks down, then falls to his knees screaming in pain. “LOW BLOW, MAN!”

*The entire table starts laughing again*

little akabayashi things:

  • actually uses his fancy cane to beat up people with Bojutsu
  • tipped a taxi driver 10,000 yen for like a five min trip
  • probably sad all the time
  • he’s good with kids
  • thinks of Anri as a little sister
  • fell in love and was rejected but wasn’t an ass about it
  • probably should have called for a hospital first
  • he’s such a loner please help him
  • knows Mairu and Kururi and probably trained at bojutsu at the same gym where they go
  • scary as sin
  • big fan of Hijiribe Ruri
  • his username in the chat is literally “brat”
  • he types really fast on his phone like what the hell does he do on it all day anyway
  • he’s in his early 30s and he talks like he’s 90
  • “””””oi-chan””””””
  • smiles all the time but still sad
  • he’s quick and smart as a fox so don’t fight him
  • literally stop aiming for his crotch when kicking, he prolly needs that
  • he hunts down man eating crabs. with a flamethrower. and a rifle. and then sells them to russia sushi. god knows what the hell is up with crabs
  • trigger warning: drugs
  • stopped two addicted girls and called their mama on them
  • he reads a lot of manga
  • and watches all the tv shows
  • compared himself to Jack-o’-lantern
  • i am sorry this became an essay about akabayashi

@awakenedfatesnsfw && Ryouma, cont. from an ask.

     It was always frustrating whenever Ryouma would play this kind
     of game with her. The princess had waited patiently, anticipating
     a day where the samurai she loved so dearly would be free of
     duties so that they could have time together… And he seemed
     more interested in writing than what she had in mind.

     Thus she’d gone for the best thing to get his attention. Hands
     carefully began to work the prince’s crotch through his casual
     attire, soon breaking out into a smile when he finally gave his
     attention to her.

     ❝ Ryouma… ❞ The dragoness purred, moving to nuzzle against
     the high prince’s cheek. ❝ Why don’t you put the writing aside
     for now? I was hoping we could have some time together… ❞

OK so found this IMAGE and this just had to happen.

So here’s what happened. The squad were at a party and they all got drunk, so John made a bet with Dave that he could give a bj to a drunk Jake without getting caught. Dave gets Jake alone, considering Jake is too drunk to tell the difference between the Striders. Suddenly, Dirk randomly appears, sees some white haired dudes face near his bf’s crotch, and in a burst of alchoholic rage,snags Dave, takes out his sword, then Jake brings out his gun and aims it at Dirk’s head in the confusion. John shows up and realizes this was a bad idea. Thankfully, Vriska was there to knock them out with her psychic abilities.

LIVE TOUR 2015- DOGMATIC -UN- Niigata 10-09-2015 live report
  • During today’s live Aoi kissed Reita. 
  • During Hyena: Ruki and Uruha did their usual neck bit. Then, Ruki moved his hand towards Uruha’s nipple but changed his mind and wanted to aim for his crotch however… since his arms are too short he couldn’t reach it and Uruha burst out laughing. 
  • Aoi had his hair in a high ponytail. 
figured it was time for a masterlist ay

Since I’m making more and more things my mine tag is losing oversight, so my link on my blog will be replaced with this thingy to which I’ll keep adding the posts I make. The tag will still be there and in use so if you’d rather browse like that, here’s the link or search for mine if you’re on mobile.

so uh legend kinda thing

per category the newest posts are on top
(….) –> aimed at a specific demographic described between the brackets
*X –> your relationship with the lads is not interpretable as platonic with this one and the letter behind the star indicated the one you’re dating/flirting with/has a crush on you/etc
+X –> another guy than the one you’re texting with is mentioned
;) –> this one’s kinda sexual

The song project

This is a new thing I’m doing, where I take lines from a song and write blurbs based on them. I only just started, but there’s more to come!

Never Be - 5sos

Other writings

Ashton blurb about the holes in his shirts

*A
Afterthought - Ashton oneshot *A
Movie night - Luke has a crush on you ooooo *L +AMC

Text AUs

Calum

you haven’t shaved in ages

 


he buys matching vans for your kid and himself *C
he films Michael sleeping on your shoulder +M
Michael loses it over spilled Starbucks +M
there’s a hole in the crotch of your sweats ;) +L
your bed has been slept in by someone besides yourself 

Luke

he wants you to wear your heels

 

(kinda tall girls) *L
you fall asleep in the burning sun (ppl who go to school and burn easily)
you get kicked out of the club +AM
they watch you rock out with headphones on +CAM
you wrote some songs while drunk *L

Michael

you text cherry bomb lines back and forth

+C
you fangirl over his new tattoo 
you argue over the laundry +A
Calum has a breakdown over spilled coffee +C
you wake up with a black eye after a night out 
you’re horny but text the wrong guy ;) *C +C

Ashton

you tell him about your day at work

(waiters)
he helps you with an anxiety attack (people who struggle with anxiety) +L 
a video of you partying surfaced *A +ML
you went day drinking and bought a shit ton of vinyl 
he’s on tour but finds a way to help you with cramps *A

All/multiple

ALL - you wear their clothes in public to irk the media 
AC - Ashton kept one of your things because it smells like you *A
AL - Luke doesn’t want you and Ashton to sing Party in the USA