or i'll hate it in a month

I know I should’ve given up months ago.. But I still hope to see your name on my screen at five in the morning when I’m falling apart and you’re all I want. But I know you’re not coming back.. And I guess I’ll have to be okay with that..
—  I miss you…
Like Ships In The Night (you keep passing me by) (5/?)

Enchanted Forest AU-Princess Emma does a reverse Cinderella and meets a Captain in a tavern instead of a Prince at a ball. It should have been a one-time thing but fate had other plans and they just keep meeting. Originally a one-shot birthday fic for @spartanguard but now a full on multichapter  Extra thanks to @phiralovesloki for being a stellar and fast beta!

5.2k | T | FF.net | AO3 | Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4

The woods were darker than Emma had expected. Clouds obscured the moon and stars and the trees were little more than shadows against the black. It was the kind of night that called for curling up by a fire, not tromping through the forest looking for an escaped pirate.

There was a pull on her wrist from the black fabric wrapped around it. Emma adjusted her direction, trusting the locator magic to lead her through the darkness. She fingered the rough cotton in the dark. The scarf Hook had used to keep her from calling Elsa’s guards hadn’t been a bad idea but with a locator potion added, it had become Emma’s personal pirate finder. Her father and his knights had clattered off toward the port assuming, as Emma had, that the pirate would commandeer a ship. By the time she had poured out the potion, it was too late to tell them that Captain Hook had fled to the forest and not the sea. Determined not to let him get too far away, Emma had set off at a gallop on a horse only to abandon it when the scarf pulled her into the deep woods.

She didn’t know where Hook was going, only that, once again, he had betrayed her. This time she was going to throw him in the dungeon where he belonged, where her father had wanted him to be from the beginning. Her mistake had been to think that she understood him, that because they had both been hurt by love they were similar. She had thought that his encounter with the Dark One had changed him, made him recognize the futility of his vengeance, made him want to be a part of something. She thought she had sensed it that night in her room and later in the council chamber, but she had been wrong. After Neal and Walsh, she should have known better, but the damn pirate had made her forget herself and forget the lesson she knew all too well–the only people she can trust is her family.

Suddenly the pull on her wrist stopped and Emma paused in confusion. Then she heard the crack of a twig from behind and on instinct, she ducked. The momentum of her attacker took him over her body and to the ground. In a flash, Emma was on top and sliding up to pin his biceps with her knees. She put her full weight forward and he hissed in pain. She grinned in triumph but the smile fell as a sharp pain pierced her thigh. She had forgotten about the hook.

“Ah! What the hell!” She rolled off and away, her right hand going to her thigh and her left pulling her dagger. She hadn’t expected an actual fight, hadn’t believed he would really hurt her despite his escape, but of course she had been wrong.

“Emma? Bloody hell, Emma! Are you hurt?” His shock and remorse made her loosen her hold on her dagger but not on her anger.

“You stabbed me with your hook! Of course I’m hurt,”

There was movement and suddenly he was beside her, his shadowed form becoming something recognizable close-up.

“Where?” Then his hand was on her knee and sliding upward as he probed for her wound. Heat flashed through her and she slapped his hand away. He drew back as if she had slapped his face.

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But what if you aren’t overthinking this time? What if all those crazy thoughts that kept you up at 3am were actually true? You’re so used to being told that you’re overreacting that you can’t even recognize when you aren’t.
—  Excerpt #84

People lie. When they’re hurt, they lie. When they’re in love, they lie.

I’ve lied about a lot of things throughout my life. I lied about the ring pop I stole when I was seven. I lied about the lamp I broke when I was twelve. I lied countless times to protect your feelings. And then, I lied when I said I wouldn’t wait for you. I lied again when I said I hated you. I lied when you asked me how I’d been six months later.

So yeah, I’ve lied a lot.

But I didn’t lie when I said it. I didn’t lie about I love you. I meant it.

From a young age, we’re taught lying is bad. But you have no idea how badly I wish I had lied about that.

—  excerpt from an unfinished book #116 // Lies

Dear ex-lover,

For months after you left I cursed you and wondered how you could hurt me like you did. I wondered why I had to go through this, why I deserved to be hurt like this. I thought life was cruel and I hated it.
But today, nearly a year later, I’m grateful for it, and I’m glad it happened. Because only when you’ve been through hell can you fully understand the beauty of heaven; only when you’ve hit rock bottom can you fully realize how exquisite happiness feels; only when you’ve been awfully mistreated can you fully appreciate the sweetness of being genuinely cared for.
His love is my treasure and most beautiful gift, it’s real unlike yours, and I cherish it even more after having been hurt so badly by you in the past. And I thank you for that.

—  Thank you for your recklessness

i hate that my heart feels so much. like i can dead ass see the SMALLEST thing ever and it’ll impact me SO much it’s unreal. that puppy over there? yeah that hit me and i’ll probably go home and think about it because it was so dang cute. that joke that was kinda sorta rude? yeah i’m gonna think about that for a solid month straight and i’ll refrain from doing anything like what the joke was pointed to again. like peoples words and actions impact me so much more than they should and i just feel like 10x what should be normal and i have yet to determine if this is good or bad because it means my highs or so high but my lows, they get so damn low. everything i feel is in extremes or nothing at all and it’s so crazy which is why i usually just keep everything inside and let it all build up and only spill to a few people or spill a little bit out and so many people think they know me and have me figured out but like, they don’t!! you only know what i show you!! because i just tell people enough so it makes me seem easy going and not at all different but really i’m so damn complex i’m like the puzzle that is a thousand pieces and when you finally piece it together you realize you’re missing some and god it’s so crazy. nothing inside of me is ever calm, i am always one inch away from the panic button, i am always one scream away from deafening myself. but you’ll never know that because i make sure i hide it so good and i make sure that i’m so damn kind and positive that you’d never see me struggling a day in my life.

the signs according to my aries mom
  • aries: god perfectly crafts anyone born under aries. plus, we have robert downey jr.
  • taurus: they're not worthy of bordering my sign
  • gemini: i don't care if chris evans is a gemini, they're all irrelevant
  • cancer: GOD, NO. STOP.
  • leo: i'm not really allowed to give an opinion here...
  • virgo: no
  • libra: i can't decide which is worse, libra or gemini
  • scorpio: wouldn't ever want to get on their bad side. they're my partners in crime, though
  • sagittarius: i wish you would have been born a sagittarius... life would have been so much better. you would be so much more fun
  • capricorn: oh my god
  • aquarius: some of the best people i've met were aquarians
  • pisces: someone needs to stop them
I Hate You - Hansol (M)

Requested: Could I get a smut where y/n is best friends with Hansol and she walks in on him masturbating & moaning for her, so she helps him out? I understand if not, thank you for your time!! 😚😚

A/N: “You had come to reclaim your rice cooker, Mark having slipped you a key as he said they would be out.” I officially just made the dumbest plotline possible.
Sorry, this is like so weird how they’re just friends but like both have things for each other, and the girl is lowkey dom lol


Word Count: 302 [holy hell]

The dorm was eerie, the dark hallway illuminated by only the dim moonlight.

You froze as you heard a low groan, withdrawing your hand from the light switch carefully.
Cautiously, you followed the sounds. As you neared, you covered your mouth swiftly, the obvious sounds of a boy touching himself vigorously echoing through the silent dorm.
He groaned loudly, chanting your name furiously as he neared his release.

“Fuck” he cursed, his teeth gritting.


Dumbly, you had pushed past the door once you heard your name, curious as to which boy had such erotic thoughts of you.
Frantically, he covered himself, his ragged breathing and flustered appearance making you flush.

“W-W-W-Why are you here?” he questioned.

The answer was silence, the deafening atmosphere quickly becoming tense.

“Don’t stop.”

He stared at you, his bewildered gaze easing as your placid features softened.

“No, I-”

He shifted on the bed, pulling the sheets close.
You stepped into the room, frowning gently as he refused to continue.

“You were thinking of me, right?”

He nodded hesitantly, his gaze darting to the floor.
You sat on the edge of the bed, making him shift uncomfortably. Deviously, you snuck a hand under the warm sheets, finding his erect length. His hands quickly caught your wrist.

“(Y/n)-” he protested.

You silenced him, leaning in eloquently.

“Louder” you teased, applying pressure, your small hand shifting up his length.

He tensed, his hold weakening slowly.

“More” he prompted, leaning against your shoulder.

His deep groans grew with each stroke, his heavy breaths filling the room.

“I’m close” he warned, pushing the sheets away frantically.

“Think of me.”

His thighs tensed, his hips bucking into your hand lazily as his seed spurted from his swollen tip.
He moaned your name loudly, his brows knitting together in euphoria.

“I hate you” he whispered, his eyes closing in embarrassment.

Malevolent Mistletoes

Summary: Dan and Phil hate each other and yet they’re underneath a mistletoe together.

Word Count: 1.1k

Genre: Fluff (and christmas)

you might have seen this already on the @phan-drabble-advent-calendar blog, but here’s for anyone who missed it! don’t forget to go check out the drabbles of other authors, there’s a new one every day this month!

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gUYS hey :-) just wanted to say I’m sorry I haven’t updated anything in a while, I’ve had writers block so I’ve been procrastinating even trying to write the next part of purple jewels but I’m starting to slowly get back the inspiration for it. It’ll get done no matter what, even if it takes a while for me to do so I hope you guys can wait a little longer (also I’ll get to my asks probably tomorrow sometime)

7 months after you said it was over I still want to talk to you.
Whenever something good happens to me I want to tell you about it.
I want to tell you about how I hate math, and I still need your help.
How I’m still not used to not having my brother around.
How my mother told me I was who ruined her life.
How so many people have seen my writing.

But I hate you. And I still need your help getting through that. But I wouldn’t hate you if you were still here.
And I’m not used to not having you around either.
You’re the one who ruined my life. You ruined me.
And so many people wouldn’t have seen my writing if you hadn’t left, because you’re the reason I write.

You were one of the greatest things that had ever happened to me but also one of the worst.

I wouldn’t be broken if I hadn’t known you, but I also wouldn’t be a writer either.

So thank you I guess. Because even though you completely changed me, it doesn’t always have to be bad.

—  Thank you for breaking me.


You can contact me through tumblr or by email at yesthisiskeelin@gmail.com. I use paypal for all payment and I live in Canada for reference to exchange rates in terms of currency (there is a big difference at the moment between USD and CAD)

I don’t draw any of the following:

  • NSFW
  • heavy detailed mech
  • anything that would make me uncomfortable so just tell me the idea first

I am open to drawing fursonas and other such things.





I hate to be making a post begging for commissions, but...

About a month ago I was given an ultimatum at my call center job: quit now and get the mental health you need to return, or we fire you. I quit in the hopes I could go back one day. I am bipolar and it has a very negative effect on my ability to hold a regular job, and with rotoscoliosis/spondylolisthesis jobs where I am on my feet also take a heavy toll on me. I’m desperately looking for a job, even one that will be very bad for my health, but I’ve yet to hear anything from anyone and I am currently in debt. Please, PLEASE consider buying anything. We can negotiate price; I’ll take anything. I don’t care. Just, please, help me get back on my feet. 

Commission Info



Quick PSA: my dear friend Intuos 4 which has served me well for 7 years is dead. It’s currently at a service centre, but I’m not sure how long the diagnostic and repairs will take, nor whether I’ll be able to afford them. So, I don’t know when I’ll be able to get back to drawing, sorry guys, especially those of you who have just followed this blog.

Everything was so much easier before you came. I had safety, I had my routines, I knew what I wanted in life. But all of sudden you were there and you were exactly the person that I wasn’t, and it bothered me. It bothered me that you always wore black and had never read a book and hated sunrises, but loved sunsets. It bothered me that I spent so many days and nights and weeks and months trying to figure you out but still had no clue who you were. And the safety that I had disappeared without me noticing, because you were there and you took everything I had and put it in a box and shook it again and again until it all was upside down and nothing made sense anymore. Everything familiar was gone, you had taken it all away. And I liked it. I liked that you came and ruined everything and put your mark on it, because I actually prefered it that way. I guess that was what scared me the most. Because I enjoyed what you did to me, and I wanted you to keep on doing it; to keep on ruining everything and make it your way. I hated myself for that, I hated not hating you and allowing you to do that to me. But I couldn’t help it.
—  Because when it came to you, I didn’t know any limits or hate. I only knew that with you, for the first time in my life, I felt free.