or extra crispy

Extra Crispy

Context: our group finally finds a tavern after two unsuccessful attempts to sleep on a mountainous path. Two of us decide to get some well deserved rest. The other two (half elf and dwarf) decide to go stare into the fireplace.

DM- *to the dwarf* “Roll a D20”
Dwarf- *rolls low*
DM- “right so the man sitting near the fire to the left of you accidentally throws his alcoholic beverage into the fire and starts a fire in the cavern”
HalfElf- I want to put some of it out with an ice spell
*he rolls and succeeds in putting a tile of fire out*
Dwarf- “I want to smother it with my body”
DM- “….alright? Roll me an athletics”
Dwarf- *succeeds*
DM-“Oooookay. -dwarf- you throw yourself into the fire and roll over all of it until you put it out. Take fire damage and 100% burn”
Halfelf- “he’s extra crispy. Wait does that mean his beard is burnt off?”
Dwarf- *completely unconcerned with his third degree burns* “MY BEARD. NOOOOOOO”

Faith - Part 1

Request: Hi I was wondering if maybe you could do a rewrite of the episode faith were instead of dean getting Tased the reader does? If not that’s totally fine also.

Pairings: Dean x sister!reader, Sam x sister!reader

Word Count: 1,570

Dean’s Age: 26

Sam’s Age: 22

Reader Age: ~16

(A/N): This a rewrite of episode 12 of season 1, “Faith”.


The impala came to a stop in front of the old abandoned building. Your brothers hopped out first and you followed them to the trunk. Dean handed you and Sam a taser each.

“What do you got these amped up to?” Sam asked.

“Hundred thousand volts,” Dean responded.

“Damn,” you stated, turning the gun over in your hands.

“Yeah, I want this rawhead extra frickin’ crispy,” Dean said, “And remember, you only get one shot with these things. So make it count.”


Keep reading

WIP Bitching Cont. Again

On today’s episode of Let’s Pretend I’m Not a Severely Depressed Individual Already Convinced Everything That I Do Has No Meaning Anyway So Might as Well Write, I’ve officially tripped my way into the Anakin and Dooku confrontation on Naboo, and it is an absolute blast, my dudes.

And by blast I mean more action (*bleeds from her eye sockets*) culminating in Dooku literally wiping the impeccable-tiled floor with Anakin’s Force Lightninged, extra crispy ass along with the origin story of Anakin finally getting a mechanical arm that can actually deflect lightsabers, because why have a mechanical arm if you can’t make it out of lightsaber-resistant material. It’s a fucking waste.

At least now I have a wobbly bridge from the Box to when Palpatine shows up on Serenno, shit-eating grin firmly in place, and declares ‘Who wants to fuck some Jedi?’ to which Serenus, currently about 4 inches deep into quality Jedi Master posterior, responds with 'Way ahead of you.’ Meanwhile, Obi-Wan pulls his face out of the pillow and ponders on how a Sith Lord can sound so much like Sheev Palpa– oh.

*oh*

I’ve written another page of Padawan Rex AU. I gotta tell you, going from the relative seriousness of Pulsion to the… how to put it… lazy playfulness of PR is odd, but not terrible. It’s kinda nice to have Obi-Wan go from 'conflicted over his love for a mass-murdering former Jedi’ to 'Hey, Rex, this is totally not a date but let me take to you my meet my friend, Dex, while we’re on leave and I won’t argue when he mistakes us for a couple’. It’s refreshing.

*rubs neck* Of course, meeting this Besalisk is mostly just a prelude to Rex meeting a completely different Besalisk and suddenly things kinda going to shit, but like four and a half people read this thing anyway so it ain’t no big dealio if it takes a drastic turn from rom com, lol we’re not dating but we have great sexual tension to oh my shit my boyfriend/apprentice just murdered the fuck out of a respected Jedi Master, better help him disappear before he’s sentenced to death only WHOOPS now the Separatists have him and it turns out things get really wacky when a Force sensitive implanted with a chip that requires him to obey without question is told 'I like the way you kill Jedi, lmao, go kill more. Execute Order 66.’

Probably should have just called this fic 'Fluffy AU? Haha. You thought. Here’s Turned Against His Will, Sith Assassin Rex fucking shit up, bitches. Surprise.’

I don’t know how many people will believe me when I say this thing has a happy ending. Probably 2 out of the four and a half readers.

Space Jam Starters

“It’s cause I’m white, isn’t it?”
“It wasn’t a dream, it really happened!”
“Dont ever call me ‘doll’.”
“Lemony fresh!”
“Feed me! Feed me!”
“I promise I’ll never swear again.”
“Did you do the original recipe or Extra Crispy?”
“Oh, fear clutches my breast!”
“But I love my mama!”
“Ever heard of the dream team? Well we’re the Mean team, wussy man.”

crazynightsatfreddys  asked:

Ok Another Trivia Question! You're pretending to play your guitar when a Oreo cookie gets thrown into a lake. How many strips of bacon do you need to fix your life? A) Infinity B) 1 C) Pineapple D) Nothing! Save the Oreo Cookie!

E) Mourn the loss of the innocent cookie and then go eat ten million Oreos with some extra crispy bacon as a side dish.

The waffle iron is quickly becoming our favorite brunch tool. In a previous episode of Mad Genius Tips, F&W Test Kitchen breakfast boss Justin Chapple revealed how to make extra-crispy, extra-easy hash browns. In this week’s episode he unveils a new, sweeter way to use the essential kitchen gadget to make something amazing: cinnamon roll waffles. All it takes is store-bought cinnamon roll dough and a waffle iron.

  Dean knows when something is going on with you. He sees that your smile doesn’t quite reach your eyes and you don’t laugh nearly as much as you usually do at his lame jokes. You, just like him, don’t like to talk about your problems, keeping them bottled up until you explode. 

  Dean doesn’t want that for you, as hypocritical as that sounds.

  Instead he comforts you in a way that you didn’t know you needed. He starts by letting you sleep in way past the time you were supposed to wake up. He knew you needed some extra rest, and he was certainly going to make sure that you got it. 

  He made sure you were eating. He made you breakfast, a plate of chocolate chip waffles, extra crispy bacon and a side of orange juice; something completely normal. He delivers it to you in bed, not caring what time it is, whether it’s eight in the morning or five in the afternoon. He just wants to take care of you.

  Though you may not want to talk about it, Dean makes it known that you can always open up to him, because he deeply cares about you and hates seeing you this way. He cuddles with you, allowing you to use his body as a pillow. He wraps his arms around you, making you feel safe and loved for a little while. To you, that’s perfect. 

  Even though the evil coursing through the world, somehow, some way, being in Dean’s arms makes you forget that you’re a hunter. You don’t need to tell Dean what’s wrong, not really. All you need is him, and he’s certain to give you just that.