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Basic Training- SSS

A/N: Here’s a preview of the Christmas one shot I’ve been working on. Thank you, anon, for requesting an SSS. This is unbetaed and subject to change. 

Modern AU Everlark. Rated E for explicit language, graphic sex, and passing references to drug and alcohol use. 


It’s his mother I see first, in the reflection of my water-spotted spoon, as I hold it up to inspect it for dirt. The curve of the metal shows her how she really is, how I see her, emphasizing her deformities—a cold and shallow woman, who’d always thought, with that over-sized head of hers, that I was never good enough for him, not even as his friend.

What kind of monster thinks that about a kid?

Our booth is in the back corner of the diner—where they seat all the ugly people—and because my back is to the rest of the restaurant, I don’t immediately notice them when they come in and are seated half a dozen tables behind us. By the time I see the bitch, she’s sipping tea out of a chipped porcelain mug, one of her haughty eyebrows raised and her puckered, prematurely wrinkled lips pursed in disapproval as she listens to a man with a buzz cut say something to her.

Subtly, so Prim doesn’t notice me looking, notice her, and then open her big mouth, I rotate the spoon to see who else is with her. Her husband sits next to her and looks none too happy about it, keeping enough distance between them for the Holy Ghost and an entire host of angels. No love lost between those two. And next to him, wedged into the corner, one of his broad shoulders pressed to the wall from lack of space, is their oldest. Across from them, with their backs to mine, is Rye, with his trademark douchebag man bun I’d recognize from outer space, and next to him, on the aisle side of the bench, is the man with the buzz cut.

It doesn’t occur to me right away that it’s Peeta—my Peeta (except he isn’t mine at all)—because Peeta has wavy blond hair that curls at the very ends, feathery wisps that hang over his collar and ears, begging to be clutched and grasped and twirled by curious fingers. (Not that I’d ever had the courage to do any of those things.) He’s had hair like that his entire life—at least for as long as I’ve known him, which amounts to pretty much the same thing—the sign of a boy who has always been careless about his good looks.

His hands give him away, gesturing as he talks. They’re recognizable even in the convex surface of my spoon, and I swallow with effort, dropping it into my coffee. Emptying a plastic cup of creamer into my mug, I swirl, swirl, swirl, trying to erase the memory of the way his hands looked holding mine. I stare down at the cream dispersing, transforming something straightforward and pure into a muddied, adulterated mess.

Of course he’d be back now for the holidays. Exodus, I guess they call it. In basic training, they let even the lowest grunts go home for Christmas.

PSA...

…to Anon/s who left TWENTY-SEVEN messages filled with actor-hate in our inbox, as well as everyone else who might be considering doing something similar: this blog is SO not here for that.

We always tried being here for people, offering respect and validation and a place to vent–about the show, about its harmful messages and above all– about the show-runners’ shitty treatment of us all. We’ve called out the systemic issues they’re abusing for the sake of making money. We tried to point out cause/effect in the fandom. Tried to dig out the root of the problem and help y’all find your voice without being manipulated by anyone. And now all this hysteria based on someone’s assumptions of what some celebrity is like and what they stand for, because ONE person with a voice justifies it? A person who defends the showrunners’ (pale, male, stale) sexist heteropatriarchal approach to the point of blaming it all on an actress they personally, for whatever reasons their imagination created–detest? Judging actors as if we know anything about them, based on how they’re handling their PR and/or dealing with their fanbase?

Are you fucking kidding me?

Some of you come here to vent about CS and Hook, and then go back to the people who foam at the mouth against all that–while at the same time advocating for another abusive hetero-imposed ship. One that is degrading for a woman, a Woman of Color at that. Some of you tolerate, or even share the creepy obsession and sexual objectification, rather dehumanizing if you think about it–of one actress, while jumping on the frantic bandwagon of hating another one, blaming her for everything. Reality check? Neither one of these women owes us fuck all. The self-appointed leaders who dictate people what to think–end up justifying the creators, the ACTUAL arseholes who cooked up this heteropatriarchal bullshit and peddled it as a ‘modern’ fairytale for the sake of $$$-making ‘entertainment’. And now this petty shit stirred by those sheep-herders who took over the hive mind of this fucking fandom–is picked up and brought here?

I’m sorry, but what IS it that we should offer now? Gossip? Judgment? Rationalization? A course on maintaining a mind of your own? A magic mirror to reflect how stupid those people are making the fandom seem? Don’t people realize theyve been manipulated once again, and that by blindly following sheep-herders they only enable their behaviour? So those of you who just wanted to vent about this, how ‘bout you take it back to those who started this? Because it’s not like if you follow them to buy whatever they are peddling (be it fanfics, spoilers, set-spotting or ‘industry insight’ info) that you have to be sheepy and let them dictate what to think and how to behave in return. You also don’t owe anyone some weird fucked up form of compensation simply because you can tell they’re lacking something in their miserable lives and they’re trying to fill that void with fandom. You have to ask yourselves why it IS that they seem to be involved in one scandalous fallout/argument/shitfest or another–every single week? And why people still allow them enough credibility to let them form their opinions?

No. Just no. All that you can get from us here, is us pointing to the real culprits. If you want someone to blame for the steaming pile of snowballing shite surrounding this show–the power lies with networks, showrunners and any identifiable bigot lobby groups who the network might perceive as powerful. Identify those and you’ll be way closer to figuring out what’s holding back that real modern fairy tale. Look at the bigger picture and you can start creating strategies to fight the powers that be. It always comes down to money. But if you’re going to focus on the perceived power of an actress, you’re shooting yourself in the foot by being, quite frankly–unrealistic.

We won’t compare actresses and pit them against each other. The level of internalized misogyny at this point is simply nauseating, and the amount of projection is… unhealthy. Can you really conclude whether an actor is aloof or homophobic based on their inaction? Y’all might prefer the one who’s nicer to you–or wait, is she just more clever, giving you fake smiles with the sole purpose of furthering the career? *mock gasp* ‘Cause yes, that IS the point: you don’t fucking know, and you never will! And how the fuck did we get from talking about the show and its issues, and the accountability that its creators are refusing to accept–to pretending that we know celebrities and their motivations to do whatever they do? I mean, what the actual ever loving fuck? We tried desperately to offer some levelheadedness here, but we are NOT going to play this high-school game. We were always here for the show, the story, the characters, the message. Not for the actors. We do NOT condone idolatry and we especially aren’t here for the dirty trash of people who try to imprint their opinions on everyone–and those opinions to be dragged here. We won’t ever pretend, despite our own personal first-hand ‘industry insight’ info (that we do not use for gossip) that we know ANY of them–and if anyone is still inclined to continue, feel free to go and vent to those who are delusional enough to think that they do.

Thank you for your attention. If this didn’t resonate, feel free to go back to your bleating now.

4
2

Imagine being told that the universe is full of light.
Once you open your eyes, the light will guide you and comfort you in your darkest moments.
Now, imagine realizing that the light exists, but that you’re blind, you’ve always been blind, and you’re never going to see anything.

» Theron Shan, The Lost Suns

last night I went to the first class in a trick dog course and there was a behaviourist there as well and things weren’t terrible but I have since been feeling all of those human things like shame and thinking I’d been doing everything wrong and letting my dog down

sketchy, sketchy

Biography of a Son

(Because, as those of you who have read my first fic probably picked up on, I have a GREAT MANY FEELINGS about General Draven’s relationship with Cassian, so I decided to bring you ADDITIONAL MISERY in the form of BACKSTORY, because that’s what we love… right? Oh the masochism of the Rogue One fandom…)

He crouches down to face the child. Tear-tracks have cut greasy paths through the grime on the little boy’s face, but the sad eyes now are dry, his expression curiously grave. The man recognises it. It is the precocious solemnity of one who experiences their first loss and then, in quick succession, their first responsibility.

“Estás seguro?” the man asks, the damp ground seeping through the knees of his uniform trousers.

The boy nods with the same deliberate sobriety, quietly resolute, too young to doubt.

“Pues,” the man says, hating himself, reaching out anyway to shake the child’s tiny hand. “Bienvenido a la Rebelión, Cassian Andor. Mi nombre es Capitán Draven.”

Read more on AO3 (1,159 words)

i think an important thing for allies to do, in any regard, is to not say “i’ll try to do better” or “i’ll try to be more educated” and just say that you WILL do better and you WILL educate yourself… and then do it. what’s the point of just endlessly rattling off that you’ll try if you don’t do something about it?

6

When Misako tries to wrap the shoot up even though Shuta’s turn hasn’t happened yet.

  • McKAY: How's about ...
  • (He pauses for a while, then looks at John again.)
  • McKAY: How about we say goodbye now?
  • SHEPPARD: No!
  • McKAY: What d'you mean, "no"?
  • SHEPPARD: I mean I'm not saying goodbye.
  • McKAY: Well, I'm saying it anyway!
  • SHEPPARD: Well, I'm not listening!
  • McKAY: Yeah, but pretty soon I won't even know who you are!
  • SHEPPARD: Then I'll remind you.
  • McKAY: Yeah, but I don't want you to see me like that. I want you to remember me as I am -- as your genius friend, not as some ...
  • SHEPPARD (firmly): Not happening.
  • McKAY: Please.
  • SHEPPARD: You're stuck with me, Rodney. Just accept it.
  • McKAY: Yeah, but I ...
  • SHEPPARD (loudly): No! (He waves a finger at him.) That's final.
  • McKAY: OK. (He looks away.)
  • SHEPPARD: OK.
  • -SGA, 5x06 (aka, the moment I started bawling)

i’m supposed to be asleep but i wanted to finish this really quick…!!
I decided to draw the elfie!ophelia request in her sorceress outfit because I LOVE most of the FE:if designs !! adventurer // outlaw and lancer lines are still my favorite, but I LOVE SORCERER CAPES ヽ(o♡o)/

tbh the outfit was really complicated and detailed i had to guess on most of the things sobs but yess i will go off to bed now and do more requests later !
also a bit happy that team art managed to win splatfest, hehe ~

i always make my elise!ophelia a dark flier…but a lot of japanese players i’ve seen have dark flier!oboro ?! I recruited them all..i want to draw her in that outfit b/c she looks awesome as well (人´∀`*)

Me: *at lunch hour*

Boss: *at my co-worker* we need this thing done to give to the client.

Me: *keeps eating pretending I am not there*

Co-worker: Divide equally between me and *lully*

Me: (when she’s at lunch hour I do it so it won’t be troubled work, but ok, nothing much I’ll do once I go back)

*After Lunch hour - When she leaves for hers*

Co-worker: *leaving* Oh, *Lully*, you’re late.

Me: (We both know that I’m not, what’s your game this time?)

Co-worker: Because of you at lunch hour I couldn’t get my work done because those papers are with you. Please do them since your lunch hour was over *looks at the clock* three minutes ago.

Me:

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Imagine werewolf!Woozi smiling contently when you pet him.

Happy National Women’s Day!!!!!
Love to all the beautiful, amazing, and stunning ladies out there! (That means all of ya’ll. You’re all incredible in your own unique ways). We will all keep moving forward, and fight for our rights. We’re getting there, slowly but surely! If women are anything, we’re tough, resilient, and beautiful. 
Even if some people say that we aren’t getting all of our rights fast enough, remember, baby steps. Those are what make the biggest difference. Baby steps.
Love goes out to all, again, happy National Women’s Day!!!

I’m kind of glad I’m not too emotionally invested in either Ben and Martin because the moment they open their mouths and talk about S4 I expect another mass exodus aka people leaving the fandom. :/

I may or may not have already gotten more. I may or may not have been to 3 different Barnes & Noble’s in the last 5 days. I may or may not have a problem.