open teacher

A bunch of things that have happened at my school.
  • The graphics teacher here is seen and worshipped as a legend. Some of the graphics kids made hundreds of stickers of just his face and stuck them on stop signs all over the world.
  • Some girl got caught piercing another girl’s bellybutton during lunch. Like ya do.
  • Our TV class (they film the school news, aka “the buzz” every week) went to California, but some of them got arrested for underage drinking while there.
  • Last year, my US history teacher kicked open his door while wearing a jedi robe, proclaiming “IT IS TIME TO PLAY DUNGEONS AND DRAGONS!” (after which he made students play dnd with him)
  • My friend went up to our creative writing teacher and yelled “I’M GAY!” to which the teacher responded “WE KNOW!”
  • We have a huge rivalry with another school. Multiple times, both schools have been told to tone it down with the hatred. Football games are insane.
  • My marine science teacher made a student hold a spider while using “it doesn’t have many mitochondria” as reassurance.
  • This kid on instagram threatened to shoot up the school on a saturday. No one really caught onto the saturday part, so everyone freaked out.
  • We take spirit week VERY seriously - during the most recent one, people were running around the school in those inflatable dinosaur costumes. Also, we have “jazzercise thursday” aka seniors dress up in neon clothing and sprint around the school with whistles, consequently making all the teachers crave death.
  • The graphics teacher found ink buckets in the ceiling of his lab. No one really knows how they got there??
  • Because this is the south, if you go to the student parking lot, I guarantee you can find at least three jeeps lined up next to each other.
  • In french class sophomore year, we were being taught how to count in french. The french word for eighty (quatre-vingts) literally transltes to four twenties. My best friend stood up and screamed, at the top of his lungs, “FOUR TWENTY!” and got kicked out of the classroom ten minutes before the bell.

That’s all I have for now; I’m sure I’ll be back with more.

‪Kindergarten Teacher: “I asked the class to write about something they know about. I haven’t looked at these yet, but his story is called, let’s see, ‘All About… Batts’?‬"
‪Me, with dread: “I don’t think that’s an ‘a’…"‬
‪***Teacher opens book to find 5 pictures of butts and no words***‬

Esteban

by reddit user alackofcoasters

As a teacher, I get to see and hear a lot of horror stories, maybe not the kind that you are used to. Kids being abused by teachers or parents, students who get hooked on hard drugs and lose scholarships, even teenagers getting raped in the classroom. Bad things happen to good kids. It breaks my heart. All in all, it’s all pretty horrific, some of the things they warn you about in school when you’re getting your teaching credential.

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‘You are just a lost little girl that needs to grow up and stop fantasising about things that are never going to happen. It’s about time you stepped into the real world.’
—  The wife of a man who has been texting me for the past three days asking me too meet him…
story time: the great pickle heist of 2016

to all of you who wanted another story: you made your bed, and now you’re gonna lie in it.

  • so this story is, from a purely superficial standpoint, about how i stole 40 pounds of pickles from my community college cafeteria today
  • but, on a deeper level
  • a literary level
  • a new yorker review kind of level
  • this story is about the perils and pitfalls of the sacrifices one nineteen year old girl makes to win the approval of authority
  • that’s me
  • I’m the girl
  • the girl who stole 40 pounds of pickles today.
  • so here we go:

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Probability

Stats teacher: “Ok so basically the idea of this is to figure out the probability of x then y then x and y together. Like how many people in this school wear flip flops here, how many people wear jeans here, and how many wear both.”

Student: “Who the fuck wears flip flops and jeans?!”

Stats teacher: *mouth opens to answer, drops his head, holds his finger up, and walks out the classroom* Five seconds later he stands the next door geometry teacher in front of the door to reveal his grey flip flops and khakis then hangs his head.

We were laughing so hard he still has no explanation as to what was going on

Announcing Blackwood Academy!

Welcome to the blog of blackwood academy! This school is a discord based online school teaching witchcraft and the occult! We welcome anyone from any walk in life or path, provided you are accepting of others! This is a 14+ school, though some classes are age restricted.
We will be offering classes on a wide range of different topics as well as weekly activities.

Entrance into this school is application basis.

This is not a role play server or blog

Keep your eyes open for the teacher’s and student’s applications coming out soon!

3

BAND CAMP CAMP

Soooo marching band au??? Here’s what everyone plays-

Max: Originally snare. Band needed a drum major, and was forced to do it cuz he was best fit. He soon loved it.

Nikki: Piccolo. Originally hated it and thought it was too girly, but not only did it keep her out of color guard with the ‘flower scouts’ but she was in the same section Ered was in, and she made flute seem cool. Plus she could deaf people if need be with that thing.

Neal: Clarinet. Old and breaks easy so he’s always got a tool kit on hand and tinkering with it. Hates the thing and swears it has a mind of its own when he’s playing, but for some reason it plays beautifully when he’s calm and into the music.

Harrison: Saxophone. Like playing weird shit, Too many Zooz is his jam.

Preston: Oboe. Refused to switch to another instrument for marching band, and doesn’t march, plays in the pit. Furiously tries out for every solo ever, super critical on others playing.

Nerris: Euphonium. Liked the deep sounds of the brass instrument, makes he feel powerful playing it. She claims the band would be nothing without he low brass supported. (She’s right for the most part)

Ered: Flute. Actually super talented, one of the best players in band. Duels sometimes playing xylophone if needed.

Nurf: Tuba. Hates tuba player stereotypes. Only plays it for support during marching season, otherwise playing trumpet. Ered taught him how to play flute after practice once.

Dolf: Bugle. Will play trumpet if bribed, and is good at it.

Space kid: Bass drum. Loves playing it. His personal drum kit has different planets painted on each drum.

Flower Scouts: All color guard. David never dares to guide them in anyway, even as band director.

Wood Scouts: Various percussion. All actually p good, just extremely cocky. Max haaaates having to work with them on timing, always slightly off cuz they think they are too good to watch a drum major.

David & Gwen: Co-directors. Trying to build a marching band from the ground up. Gwen as originally the band teacher for elementary schoolers, but bailed as soon as she saw a new band teacher opening up. No more deafening recorders.
David is well established in composing music, and helped direct a couple bands before, but never had one of his own. He was introduced to a ragtag group of band kids in need of a director with a shit school budget and old instruments to match. Turns out they ran off many directors and needed to be ‘whipped into shape’.


If u got any questions about this au feel free to ask me ^^

“This wouldn’t work”

Remus Lupin x Reader (teacher x student)

Request:

CAN YOU PLEASE WRITE A LONG IMAGINE ABOUT TEACHER!REMUS x STUDENT!READER? I REALLY LIKED YOUR LITTLE IMAGINE ABOUT THE TEA AND WALKS YOU DID IT WAS CUTE! LOCE YOUR BLOG BTW


It was a cold, rainy Saturday in November and Y/n was sitting in the owlery, looking outside, where the icy winds blew around the red leaves. Y/n wasn’t the person to be very sensitive but somehow she felt a sense of homesickness today. 

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undead0relived  asked:

more pta sans please, its to die for, thank you and have a nice day~

Well, since you asked so nicely…
~~~

Sans: *sits there, tears rolling down his skull*

Toriel: Sans… Sans please. You don’t have to do this.

Sans: no…. I have to. It has to be done. *looks up to the ceiling* dad…? i love you. more than anything…. and i’d hate to do this but… *begins to cry* there’s just no other option!

*the rest of the PTA watch from a distance, not believing their eyes*

Sans: *tears a hole into time and space to access the Void* i’m sorry dad! i’m so sorry! *throw’s Helen’s lemon squares into the Void*

Gaster: *recoils in horror* Son! How could you do this to me! I thought you loved me!

Sans: father! i do! i still do, but the universe just can’t take it!

Gaster: NOOOOOO! *slowly begins to melt away into nothingness*

Sans: *sobbing hard*

Helen: OKAY OKAY WE GET IT YOU DON’T LIKE MY LEMON SQUARES JESUS CHRIST!

~~~

Linda: *notices that Sans is strangely absent from the PTA meeting and that it’s just Toriel* *sighs in relief*

Toriel: *smiles politely* So, where shall we start?

Linda: Well, I was thinking, for the upcoming sports season, we should separate the boys and the girls, as well as separating the monsters and humans.

Toriel: But that is so costly, as well as unnecessary.

Linda: Well it will have to do, Toriel. We can’t go around forcefully mixing these two races! It’s just not fair to the humans.

Toriel: Now Sans and I think that-

Linda: Sans isn’t here right now, so it doesn’t matter what he thinks! He’s the idiot who doesn’t believe in mandatory gluten free lunches! And thank god he decided to miss out on-

Toriel: Ah ah, not so fast. *pulls Sans out of her inventory*

Sans: heard you were talkin’ shit, bitch.

Linda: OH MY WORD-

Sans: fuck your word, your gluten free lunches, your racism, and you.

~~~

Helen: So yes, I do think vaccinations should not be mandatory.

Sans: well, come on. we have to keep our kids safe. vaccinations will prevent disease.

Helen: *pinches the bridge of her nose* Sans, you wouldn’t understand. You don’t have a child.

Sans: whoa whoa- excuse me?!

Helen: Frisk is human. You’re a monster. And besides, you don’t even have a position here. You’re just filling in for Toriel, who is a teacher

Sans: *opens his mouth*

Helen: If she wasn’t a teacher, we wouldn’t even have her at these meetings. I don’t see why we still continue to let her, though. She’s the only monster in this school, filling our children’s heads with nonsense. She needs to be fired.

Sans: *clamps his mouth shut, just gritting his teeth*

Helen: Anyways, back to what I was saying-

*1 week later*

Fiona: *head of the PTA* And I am sad to announce I will be retiring from my position as head if the PTA. However, we have been able to fill in positions that had been previously absent! Monsters, as well!

Helen:….. What?

Fiona: Allow me to introduce Undyne, the Athletics coach for both boys AND girls!

Undyne: *bursts in* Hell yeah! With me on board, we’re gonna win EVERY game!

Fiona: Mettaton as the drama teacher.

Mettaton: *comes in, posing* Truly there is no finer choice!

Fiona: Alphys, our new nurse!

Alphys: *politely sitting in a chair* H-hi…

Fiona: Gaster, our new physics teacher.

Gaster: *appears* My son built a machine to drag me out of the void just for this. Oho, I’m gonna vaccinate soooo many of your children.

Fiona: And Papyrus, our head booster mom.

Papyrus: I can’t wait to start our first fundraiser! We will sell ALL the cookie dough!

Helen: *gawks* *turns to Sans* You enlisted your entire family?!

Sans: *only chuckles*

Helen: Toriel put you up to this, didn’t she? I will speak to the head of the PTA about this!

Sans: *his chuckles turn into a low and deep laugh, before transforming into a horrifying cackle, slowly growing louder and louder as he laughed evilly* *the lights go out, his sockets go dark, vast pits and a maniacal grin is spread across is skull* *his next words are spoken in a empty, haunting tone* Toriel IS head of the PTA.

Have a nice day~
ID #14343

Name: Endy
Age: 19
Country: United States

Im a really shy person so making friends in college is hard since everyone just go to class and then leave, what I’m trying to say is that I’m lonely… I would like to have someone as a friend even if there hundreds of miles away.

I can say that I’m an open minded person. I love food and cats. I like to write poems, read, paint and draw. I want to become a teacher or counselor, I’m not sure yet I do know that I would like to help the kids to pursue their education and listen to the ones who need love and attention if they don’t get it at home. I don’t know what else to say about myself, I’m just a simple person lol.

Preferences: 18-25

Prepare for Trouble (Yoongi x Reader)

VALENTINE’S DAY SPECIAL SERIES #3

Pairing: Yoongi x Reader

Genre: Fluff + Humour

Summary: Yoongi helps you escape detention so you can spend Valentine’s Day together.

Word count: 983 words 


You let your head hit the desk as you slumped forward in your seat. The bell rang shrilly in the background, signalling the end of the school day.

Unfortunately for you, you were stuck serving another detention. Something about not adhering to the school’s dress code (it might of had something to do with the fact that you were wearing a “school ruined my life” hoodie on a day that wasn’t Casual Friday).

Normally, a detention wouldn’t bother you much. But today was different. It was Valentine’s Day, and your boyfriend Yoongi had promised you would spend the day together.

You and Yoongi had been together for almost a year but didn’t see each other very frequently. Over the last spring break, you had met at a music workshop. You performed as a duo, affectionately dubbing yourselves “Team Trouble.”

Yoongi lived two hours away by train. The majority of your communication took place over text or Skype, but somehow, you made it work.

Groaning, you pulled out your phone and hid it underneath the desk. You tapped a quick message to Yoongi.

SENT 3:35 PM

srry babe im in detention

RECEIVED  3:35 PM

dude wtf the one day…

SENT 3:36 PM

i didnt choose the thug life, it chose me 💔

RECEIVED 3:37 PM

dont worry. im gonna get you outta there.

You stifled a laugh, butterflies forming in your stomach. Truthfully, you were dying to see Yoongi again. Your last date was two weeks ago, and meetings were becoming fewer and father in between.

“Y/N!” your teacher barked, making you jump. Your phone slipped out of your fingers and landed on the ground with a loud thud. You picked up, cursing once you realized the spiderweb of cracks had grown farther. “Put that phone away.”

Rolling your eyes, you tucked your phone into your back pocket. Stretching over the desk yet again, you let your eyelids flutter shut. Soon enough, you felt the familiar pulls of sleep and surrendered to them.


Tap. Tap Tap.

Your eyes shot open as you registered the sharp sound of something colliding against the window beside you. Looking over your shoulder, you spotted a blond boy whipping stones from two storeys below.

This boy, of course, was Yoongi. Your boyfriend. The James to your Jessie.

With wide eyes, you retrieved your phone. You then realized you had several unread messages from Yoongi. You opted to ignore them.

SENT 4:25 PM

what aRE YOU DOING

You watched as Yoongi stopped throwing pebbles and took out his phone.

RECEIVED 4:26 PM

thank god its you…i can’t really see from here

SENT 4:26 PM

ok but that doesn’t answer my question

RECEIVED 4:26 PM

you werent answering my texts so

RECEIVED 4:27 PM

anyways just jump

SENT 4:27 PM

DO U WANT ME TO DIE?

RECEIVED 4:27 PM

relax, you wont. besides ill catch u

Sure, Yoongi would catch you. More like his crushed, broken body would once you landed on him. But you saw him looking up at you expectantly, a gummy smile on his face. And damn, a broken ankle would be worth the fall.

You turned and began to open the window.

The teacher looked up at you suspiciously. “Y/N,” he demanded, his eyes narrowing. “What do you think you’re doing?”

“Just opening the window,” you replied breezily. “It’s kinda stuffy in here, don’t you think?”

Using your entire body, you pushed the heavy window open completely. It didn’t open as wide as you had hoped, but you could probably fit through the opening.

You glanced back up at the teacher, noting that he had gone back to grading papers. Unceremoniously, you chucked your backpack out of the window and watched delightedly as Yoongi stumbled to catch it.

Quickly, you stood up and swung your legs over the window sill. The teacher shot up from his seat, a threat forming on his lips.

“Y/N, don’t you dare–” he shouted, but the rest of his message was lost as you pushed yourself through the small opening.

The drop was only a second in duration, but time slowed as you tumbled to the ground. You could feel a wild smile stretching over your face. Yoongi’s body appeared closer and closer with each passing moment. His arms were outstretched, and, squeezing your eyes shut, you reached out for him and prepared for the impact.

The adrenaline numbed the pain from the initial impact. When you opened your eyes, you were sprawled over Yoongi’s chest. Quickly, you scrambled upright and lifted your weight off of Yoongi.

“Oh my god!” you shrieked as Yoongi remained motionless. “Yoongi? Are you okay!?”

His eyelids fluttered open as he struggled to inhale. “Fine,” he wheezed, thumping his chest. “Winded.”

You stood up and pulled Yoongi to his feet, satisfied to see he was still capable of holding himself upright. You grabbed your backpack from the grass and peered upwards.

Your teacher’s upper body was leaning out of the windowsill. He was screaming incoherently, veins popping out of his neck and redness spreading over his entire face.

“Sorry, sir,” Yoongi called. He grabbed your hand and held it up for the teacher to see. “I’m going to be borrowing this one for awhile.”

You and Yoongi sprinted off of school property, your carefree laughter carried away by the wind. The cold February air nipped at your cheeks, and neither of you were dressed warmly enough to be outside. Yet, in that moment, everything was perfect. It was with absolute certainty that you knew you were happiest with Yoongi’s hand in yours.


That evening, Yoongi took you out to dinner and presented you with a stuffed Meowth. “For old time’s sake,” he said.

With a laugh, you accept the gift and wrapped your arms around Yoongi’s waist. “Prepare for trouble,” you began with a smile.

“Make it double,” he finished, pressing a soft kiss on your lips.

- Girl in Luv

A/N: Why did I reference Pokémon AGAIN? The world will never know…Anyways, hope you enjoyed Young and Pure Yoongi™ 

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deleterious // liam dunbar

summary ; in which the concealed, hidden enigma of the supernatural is revealed to the population of beacon hills, and liam pays the price.

pairing ; liam dunbar & reader

warnings ; 6x14 spoilers, violence, fighting, quite a bit of swearing, blood, bullying, my baby liam being beaten up :(

word count ; 3.5k

published ; 26th september, ‘17

masterlist

stay safe + ily🏹

This, as Mason was mentally tallying from beside you, was the third time Liam was having to hold you back from biting someone’s head off since you had unwillingly trudged through the doors with your boyfriend by your side and under the abrasive scrutiny of seemingly every single person you passed by. “Hey!” You had snapped bitterly at the group of gawking students loitering by their lockers opposite yours and muttering to one another, most likely about the rumoured events that happened a few nights prior, thinking they were being discrete as they nodded and pointed in the direction of your friends and you.

Liam’s hands expeditiously grasped your upper arms from behind and pulled your struggling figure against his chest, just like he’d practised twice before in the short span of fifteen minutes, to prevent you from marching across the corridor and unleashing the fire you usually kept locked away. The callow and crude pupils snickered as if it was hilarious that they knew the boy they nastily whispered about could hear everything they were saying, and you couldn’t help but seethe, “You got something you want to say?!”

“(Y/N), babe, stop,” Liam muttered softly against the shell of your ear, trying to diffuse your anger and acrimony, but as much as that usually worked against the explosive ball of feistiness that you held deep within yourself, this time your harsh glare refused to relent - especially when they were talking bad about your boyfriend, whom they knew nothing about.

You knew you should’ve probably controlled your bursts of anger better, notably much more due to the fact that you shouldn’t have been bringing more attention to any of you since the most recent occurrences. But you really couldn’t help it; there these people were, acting completely counterfeit and utterly unfair towards a boy who just wanted to save his friends and had risked his life on so many occasions to save the lives of the same people who now spitefully spewed malicious comments about him as he walked past them in the hallways. It was unkind, and cruel, and it made you so god damn angry.

“No, Liam! If they have something to say, then fucking say it!”

The boy took a step forward, the glint in his green eyes threatening. You couldn’t help but scoff, your eyes raking from his over-gelled hair to his (ugly) branded, sports shoes in disgust as you watched him open his mouth, assumably to spew words that would just set your vexation and rage spiralling even further out of control. Until, the sound of the bell ringing and teachers slamming open their classroom doors to welcome students upon entrance sounded throughout the tension-drowning halls, and the boy’s lips fell closed.

The chuckle slipping from the tip of his tongue brought the resented roll of your glaring eyes about as they then watched him stalk away in the opposite direction, headed to his next class. Liam’s hand squeezed at your arms gently, asking the wordless question, and you had to take a deep breath to calm and dissipate your sparking temper before turning slowly in his grasp. 

The hues of worry masking the blue in his piercing irises provoked a wave of guilt to sweep across your being, and you had to avert your eyes from his compelling gaze, “I-I… I’m sorry.”

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