oops my girlfriend is next to me

The Outsiders Conversations (based on actual conversations I've heard at school)

Ponyboy: I spent an hour on my hair this morning and now it’s messed up!
Johnny: …. Because you slept on the bus..
Ponyboy: Yeah but I used aquanet so it should’ve been fine, I thought

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Steve: Wanna fight bro?
Sodapop: Do what?
Steve: Ya wanna fight.. bro?
Sodapop: I beg your pardon?
Steve: I’M ASKING FOR YOU TO FUCKING FIGHT ME
Sodapop: I’m doing my algebra homework. We can in Spanish next period
Steve: Alright lit

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Dallas: Why the fuck are the peanut butter cookies 3 quarters but the chocolate chip ones are 2? They’re both the same size!
Two-Bit: Ain’t that called discrimination?

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Darry: Homie what the matter?
Sodapop: that girl I was talking to bro
Darry: what about her?
Sodapop: she got someone on the side
Darry: shit fam
Sodapop: yeah she got a girlfriend
Darry: bro

{TWO OF THESE WERE MY CONVERSATIONS LMAO OOPS IF U CAN GUESS WHICH ONES I WILL GIVE U A MILLION DOLLARS}

anonymous asked:

First time you got a blow job

Where else? Stay-away Theatre Camp.

I was 16 and I had a girlfriend (oops) but I had this fun little habit of stage kissing every single person I came across, boys and girls alike. Ya know like you do at theatre camp.

But there was a hot boy there from Ireland (yup) and we started stage kissing, then we started real kissing, then before you know it, he’s blowing me on my bed as the sun is setting through the windows and Touch Me from Spring Awakening plays in the background. Felt amazing, he was amazing, and I proceeded to be vaguely in love with him for the next 2 and a half years.

Very picturesque. Very cliche. And very, very gay. 🏳️‍🌈

fic: mercy.

shamless drunk!carmilla fluff. aka the one where carmilla breaks into the wrong apartment and tries to booty call laura, who attacks her with spatula.

read also on ao3.

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Carmilla is pretty sure the world is spinning

Well, scientifically, she’s positive the world is spinning because otherwise the world would undeniably be ending but. Not the point.

Maybe it’s just the sky that’s spinning. Or the stars. Or just this lamppost she can’t seem to let go of.

She’d stumbled out of the club half an hour ago and she’d tried to make it back to her own apartment, really she did, but these shoes were really not meant for walking and her brain was having difficulty communicating with her feet.

Somehow, god only knows how, it occurred to her that one of the girls she’d been seeing lived around here. Maybe it was because she recognized that weird homeless guy on the corner who always offered her a churro.

She knows she lives in a brick building and this one looks a hell of a lot like the one she’s been coming in and out of for the past month (most of the time off of the fire escape and it’s a good thing she’s only ever seen it in the dark – it makes the recognition process so much easier). She pulls her phone out of her pocket. Well, she tries to. It tumbles to the ground, into a pile of snow. A slew of nearly unintelligible curse words fall from her mouth and she reaches into the snow bank to pick it up. She pokes at the screen. Nothing. She tries again. Still nothing. She sticks out her tongue and blows a raspberry at it. “Useless, pieces of technology.” She murmurs to herself. She tucks her phone back into her pocket, still swearing at it, and she looks up at the building. The door is all the way on the other side of the building and she still can’t manage to let go of this lamppost so she knows getting over there is an impossibility. Her mouth is starting to feel cottony and her eyelids are closing and if she doesn’t get into an apartment soon, she’s liable to fall asleep in this snowbank. Or next to Churro Charlie.

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anonymous asked:

It was my girlfriends ( I'm a girl ) birthday on Friday and she shares a room with her sister. But while her sister was at work I fucked my girl till she was moaning baby and ate her out till she was pulling my hair out on her sisters bed because it was bigger. Oops. I also fingered her the next night while her sister was asleep in the room! My girl wanted good birthday sex and she always gets what she wants 😏

anonymous asked:

prompt: cas is ace and he's scared to tell dean, but one night after a few too many drinks on cas' part, he tells dean and lots of cuddling ensues

Dean and Cas have been best friends pretty much since the day they met in their Play Analysis class freshman year of college. Dean wasn’t out at the time, not even really to himself (he was attracted to girls after all), but he still saw Cas walk into the room and thought, “I hope that guy is into dudes.”

Three years, a couple of awkward kisses and a slew of awkward interactions later, Cas is finally opening up to Dean.

It’s their senior year, and they’ve been celebrating several nights a week. Cas has been drinking a little faster than usual tonight, and Dean notices he’s drunk before Cas realizes it.

“Dean, I really like you, you know that?” he says at the bar, leaning heavily into Dean’s side.

“Yeah, buddy, I know. You think you might want to slow down a little?”

Cas takes another shot. “I never told you–I probably should have, but I just…I’m embarrassed.”

“Cas, you don’t have to tell me any–”

“I’m asexual.”

Oh. Well that explains a lot. “You don’t like sex?”

“No, no, sex is fine. Sex is whatever. I just don’t–I don’t feel it. Yeah, that’s the right word. I don’t feel it.”

Dean’s still not really sure what he means, but he can always just look up asexuality later. Or ask Cas when he’s not hammered. “Why are you telling me this, Cas?”

“Because I like you. I want you to like me, but I’m embarrassed. If we had sex, it would be–it would be bad. You deserve good sex, Dean. You’re very attractive.”

“Thank you, buddy. But I like you, too. What if I wanted to be with you and have bad sex–or no sex–more than I want to be with anybody else and have good sex?”

Cas makes an adorably confused face. “I don’t understand.”

“C'mere, Cas,” Dean says before pulling Cas into his arms and giving him a strong hug. “I really care about you, all right? Come home with me tonight, and we can talk more in the morning. I’m not letting you go home by yourself in this state anyway.”

Cas still looks confused, but he nods and lets Dean lead him out of the bar.

It’s not the first time Dean’s taken care of a drunk Castiel, but it’s still somewhat of a fight to get him into bed properly. They’ve also never slept in the same bed before either, but when Dean tried to leave his room Cas grabbed his arm and yanked him into bed next to him.

He wrapped all of his limbs around Dean and held him so tight he couldn’t move.

“Cas.”

“Shhh, sleep.”

Fine. They can work out whatever the fuck this is in the morning.

2

e l i a n a  r u i z // 21 years old

I’m going to be honest here.  Becoming a Simicide Girl is entirely out of my comfort zone.  But I think that’s why I need to do it.  I’ve never had much self-confidence, and the idea of having dozens of photos scares me more than a little.  But I still find myself drawn to the concept.  The last time models were accepted, I waffled back and forth for ages over whether I should submit, until it was too late.  I moped around the house for a week, until my girlfriend made me promise that I would apply the next time around.  And, well, here I am.  

note: couldn’t work this into the bio, but the plan is for her to slowly get more tattoos and piercings as she gets more confident and comfortable taking risks. so that’s why she looks pretty plain right now. :)