I walked into the kitchen one night and, straight away, I was met with a sight that shocked me -Dec had managed to open a tin of beans and get theminto a pan without losing any of his limbs which, by his standards, was like cooking a six-course meal on top of Mount Everest. But then he looked at me, then looked at the beans and uttered the immortal words, ‘what do I do with these?’ A few suggestions sprang to mind, but I won’t repeat them in print, so I told him to just heat them up and put them on the toast. He looked at me as If I’d just suggested rubbing them into his hair, and then he said, 'don’t be stupid, you’ve got to cook them properly - how will I know when they’re cooked through? I don’t want to catch salmonella…’ I tried to stay calm and told him the clue was in the title - the were BAKED beans, they’d already been cooked and he was just warming them up, but he wasn’t having any of it. He took one more look at the pan and made a big decision.
I’ve been asked about this, but I never argued for it to be Dec and Ant, I’ve never even really thought about it. It’s really not a big deal. Honestly. I’m fine with it, I really am. It’s not like I still lie awake at night thinking about it, or it’s secretly bothered me for years or anything like that.
Like autobiographies? Why not try: Ooh! What a lovely pair
By Ant and Dec
This is the book everyone has been waiting for: national heroes Ant and Dec, Britain’s most successful television duo, have invited their millions of fans into their world. From youth clubs to blind school, pubs to jungles, there’s a wealth of behind-the-scenes anecdotes that have never been told – until now.