this scene has no chill whatsoever AND WAS SO BEAUTIFULLY ACTED THAT IT WILL CONTINUE TO DESTROY ME ON A REGULAR BASIS but anyway.
raven doesn’t even understand what the first “I’m sorry” is for. she looks at him, kind of expects something, because it doesn’t click for her yet, but then there is him - murphy - who feels he needs to repeat what he just said, because it’s something that pulls so strongly at his heartstrings that his mind flares and he cannot do anything else but go and say it again. only this time he says it in the way she will understand “i’m sorry for doing this to you, raven”, bringing all their history to the foreground with a single line. and note that by mentioning the past he doesn’t make it about the past only - murphy literally talks about the now “doing” as he is in the belief that he is still causing raven pain. that he is the reason that she feels it every single day. that he is the reason she wants to stay behind and chooses death in order to free herself from it all, because in zero g she doesn’t need her legs, right…? (as she said in 2x02).
raven is actively vulnerable with him, opening up like she has never before and is even kind in the way she does it, because she does it with a certain care that envelops murphy fully - she doesn’t want answers, but wants to share her feelings. she doesn’t want to lose her mind, but wants things beyond what the bunker can ever give her - but from where murphy is standing he feels like the root cause for this somewhat unsolvable problem, feels responsible for the path she chooses now, because he took (accidentally, and from his point of view) more from her than he initially believed (there is a reason why spacewalks are brought up so much this season and i will get into it in a separate post).
so, there is heavy sense of guilt involved in this moment with which he regards himself. and the interplay is fascinating because while it gets very hard for him to deal with everything surrounding her pain - to the point that he has to look away when she talks about her leg, because he didn’t expect her to say that (she is not mad but can deal with it) - he is also not putting any walls up, but lets the weight of her words sit on his shoulders, which then also absolve him of his guilt. he says “I’m sorry” twice, because he is opening up as much as she is and he really means it, but then again raven is there to look him in the eyes and tell him “this is not your fault”, because that’s how it is. there is a difference between what happened to her leg, and what happens to her mind and how involved murphy is in both events (or not for that matter if you know what i and raven mean).
the magic of it all is that he starts to connect with raven and she frees him from his pain and therefore her own, because “this is not your fault, murphy” means, “let’s make peace” and not “I hate you!”. this is not a simple “I’m sorry” from him. this is not a simple statement she makes. it’s about how they feel.
so what happens here is that she literally crushes his image of how he sees raven the same way he crushed his image of how raven used to look at him (4x06). the sheer narrative intensity with which this scene approaches their relationship is truly a highlight, because its the uncontrollable way memories heighten the emotions and make room for new character development that both go through at the same time. through their self-destructiveness they have snapped and found the middle ground within their own dynamic, and there is so much maturity in both of their concessions that they finally understand one another like they have never before.
in that sense, it’s important to note that raven and murphy are quite literally mirror images of one another. he is the cockroach who has come a long way, from the person who sought out revenge and now really cares and looks out for the people he loves. and she is the raven who was once feeling nothing but the pain in her leg, who couldn’t forgive and now has come to the point where she can actually deal with it and make that step towards him. they are so connected to their past, but also so distinct from how they used to be… the best part of it all is that they meet halfway to hug and say goodbye, because yes they have had a very rough beginning, but who said that they couldn’t have a nice ending (or a new start? who knows… all i know is that i am crying again).
i’m just saying that they are both killing me at the moment.
so far the one of the only scenes in netflix original history that matters is when dizzee is tripping out and thor asks him “have you ever been in love?” and dizzee replies “once" and thor asks “how did it end?” and dizzee replies “it’s hasn’t ended” and the little giddy smiles on their faces after that reblog if u agree
Mulder softly crooning, “Hey now, none of that…” and then actually reaching to cradle his newborn son will never cease to be my undoing. I have a physical reaction. I can’t watch it anymore. It lives in my dreams.
It doesn’t matter if it’s only a small scene, some people forget we still have a lot to fight for in the LGBT community. In at least 73 countries being gay still a crime, until 1973 being gay was considered a disorder and a lot of people still fighting for the “gay cure” and I know sometimes we act like we have it all, the world doesn’t have homophobia anymore and we already have the representation we need but this is not true.
Trini it’s the first superhero who is queer in the big screen and this is important, don’t ignore it by saying “It’s only a small scene”, because neither way it’s really important for us. This doesn’t mean we will stop fighting for more, it just means we shouldn’t erase her importance just because she won’t have a big coming out or openly talk about her sexuality the whole movie.
Hearing Emeraude talk about Izzy’s and Raphael’s relationship in 2b, that they are not done, upcoming heartbreaking and heartbroken scenes and if Izzy can deal with Raphael being asexual… I just wanna delete myself.
Sorry to be that person, Emeraude, but the fans? They really don’t wanna see this. Bye.