only funny thing he's said so far

Story time: Shit my students write

So I gave my students a quick writing exercise at the beginning of class. The prompt: What is your zombie apocalypse plan?

For only having 10 minutes, I got some pretty excellent, creative, answers, but I think my favorite was also the shortest by far. He said,

“Kill myself. I’m not cut out for that survival shit, and lets be real, in an apocalypse the things worth living for won’t exist anymore. ”

Pessimistic, but refreshing in terms of originality. I gave him a 100.

third wheel [michael m. x reader]

prompt where michael x reader are dating but for some reason jeremy doesnt like the reader and the reader doesnt want to ruin their friendship so they end things and michael just loses it and jeremy sees hes fuked up and then goes to the reader to explain and jeremy and reader are friends and michael and reader are haply and everyone is happy!!! or whateves you wanna do with the prompt just like reader n’ jeremy beef lmao )

omg y e s i l oveit because jeremy. i love jeremy a lot guys

i said this in the tags but the dots at the end are typing dots which is why they’re bold

warnings: 


    Jeremy was looking at you. 

    Not just looking - he was staring you down, and you didn’t really get why at first. The way his gaze lingered on you whenever you’d slide into the seat next to Michael and greet him with a kiss on the cheek, just blinking in the sight of the two of you. The way his grip would tighten around a fork or the strap of his backpack or a pencil when you’d press a quick kiss to Michael’s cheek. The way he’d greet you, voice shaking slightly at your sudden entrance as he said your name as if something was wrong with it and you and what did you do to him what’s wrong. Michael apparently didn’t see it, for he was enamored with you in every way - his hand always slipping into yours without a second thought and pulling you slightly closer so your shoulder would gently bump against his, apparently unable to feel the burning stare into his back - which was always the exact moment you realized Jeremy had been pushed back behind the two of you.

     And it affected everything. The awkward silence between you and Jeremy the moment Michael left the room; the delay in texts when it was just Jeremy asked what Michael was up to when the answer was that he was with you; the fact that Michael asked you if Jeremy seemed different, like someone was telling him what to do when he grew too distant, only for him to suddenly reappear, acting as if everything is alright even though his eyes would never meet yours and he just seemed so damn far away from you - and you noticed how he’d retreat from conversations if you and Michael started taking over with your own couple-y stories.

     So one day you hid in the bathroom during lunch - just as an experiment to see how Jeremy would react. You texted Michael you had something to do for a class before heading upstairs, away from where anyone could find you easily. When you saw Jeremy in the hall later, he was different. He was happier, more sure of what he was saying - the way it was with them before you and Michael started dating. So you started making excuses, either skipping lunch entirely or leaving early or “suddenly” having things to do when the three of you would hang out. Jeremy was happier, Michael got his best friend back in little, subtle ways, and you?

     You were conflicted. Could anyone blame you? Your boyfriend’s best friend didn’t like you-

    Holy shit.

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Confidence // Kim Seokjin

-

the prompt: could you please do a prince!seokjin fluffy scenario? au i used: “my parents are hosting a royal ball with neighboring monarchs and you noticed me, heir to the throne, shoving food into a bag to steal.”

words: 4425

category: fluff

author note: seokjin deserves all the love in the world i hope he knows how loved he is.

- destinee

Originally posted by jinmini

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Jughead & Reader: Just Like The Movies

Summary: For years you’ve crushed on Jughead Jones but never had the courage to tell him. One night the two of you are at a party and neither of you are having a good time. Jughead decides to take you to the drive-in where the two of you spend the night together.

Requested by: anonymous


Listen to: Greek Tragedy - The Wombats


“Come on! Dance with us!” Veronica said as she tried to pull you off the couch. You wouldn’t budge. 

“No thanks.” You laughed shyly, afraid that if you obliged you would only embarrass yourself in front of all the people at your school. You spent your entire high school career avoiding possible embarrassing situations so you could make it until graduation without people laughing at you. 

Veronica playfully rolled her eyes at you then let you go to sit alone on the couch. The party seemed fun and you thought that there would be a possibility of having a good time, so you decided to join your friends. But as soon as you stepped inside and saw all of the under-age drinking going on and the terrible dancing, you decided you were more comfortable just watching. 

Though you spent a good amount of time laughing at awkward situations you observed, like Dilton Doiley getting rejected by one of the high school seniors, or Moose accidentally spilling his beer all over Kevin, you honestly wanted to go home. 

Parties weren’t really your thing because you hated dancing, hated a lot of the music they played, found no joy in dancing with guys you thought were creepy, and didn’t enjoy drinking. The only reason you stayed was because you were holding out hope that maybe he’d show up. 

Jughead Jones was similar to yourself. He also hated parties and basically anything to do with Riverdale. But a lot of his friends were at the party and you thought that maybe they’d also force him to come. You were hopeful. 

You decided it was getting a little too crowded in the house so you walked out to the backyard. A few groups of people were hanging around, talking and drinking so you weren’t totally alone as you had expected. You looked around the backyard and found a bench near a garden. You sat down and thought of how many excuses you could use to leave, when someone joined you. 

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Lloyd Garmadon Headcanons

My headcanons for The Child™ Lloyd, as requested by that anon who asked who my favorite Ninjago character was.

Bear with me on some of these because I’ve only watched up to the end of S5 (they don’t have anything past that on Netflix) and I dunno much about the later seasons past Hands of Time involving some serious timeline bullshit of Homestuckian proportions.

  • Sometimes he has nightmares where his dad is accusing him of betraying him and yelling at him for sending him to the Cursed Realm. He wakes up sobbing and usually with a lightbulb blown because his powers surged while he was dreaming.
  • The first time he ever kills someone, he doesn’t think much of it at the time. But when the reality of what he did sets in after the adrenaline fades, he locks himself in his room for a week and refuses to talk to anyone. He’s never really the same afterwards.
  • He hates it when people treat him like a child, but he also hates being given too much adult responsibility.
    • “Kai I don’t care if I was 10 when I met you I’m mentally a teenager dammit don’t treat me like I’m little.”
    • “SENSEI I AM LITERALLY LIKE 12 WHY ARE YOU ACTING LIKE I’M AN ADULT I CAN’T EVEN DO CALCULUS AND REMEMBER TO FEED THE FISH LET ALONE TAKE CARE OF THIS PLACE BY MYSELF FOR A WEEK”

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My dad is half way through season 6 of New Girl (he stopped at The Cubicle) and I asked him his thoughts. I swear I never said a word about it to him.
His exact words were:
“eh… It’s not as funny as the other seasons… I don’t understand why is Jess with that weird dude if she said she likes Nick. Nick and Megan Fox are boring, idk who thought they worked well together. And Nick was supposed to have grown by now, but he still seems lost to me. The only good thing so far is Winston, and Schmidt and Cece’s new home”.

I can’t tell you how happy this makes me 😁

Incredibly ineffable and undoubtedly enigmatic

Probably the shortest thing ever, but u thought that it was kind of sweet so I decided to share. Tell me what you think, please 🤗


She’s… ineffable. The only thing that Jughead couldn’t put into words. He was by far the only student, nay, the only person in Riverdale who could speak so eloquently in every situation imaginable. Betty Cooper, however, was the only thing that could leave him speechless and only able to murmur and, embarrassingly enough, moan. Every time she touched him, every time she said his name, every time she looked at him and sniggered when he says something funny or sarcastic, he forgets everything he learned about simple words and phrases in 3rd grade. She’s simply ineffable.

When she lays in his lap and lets him trace gentle circles in her shoulder he can only sigh. When she watches him write over his shoulder (a gesture he would despise if done by anyone else) he can only try to keep his breath and inevitable blush under control.

He’s… enigmatic. A deep and slightly disturbing puzzle to solve. Betty Cooper found her normally perfect and organized self fall victim to his warm breath against her skin, his calloused hands in her hair, and his dry humor. He was the only thing that could make her perfect life unfold before her in the best way possible. HER juggie. She feels utterly special when he shows his romantic side during their dates and cries when she shows him movies like The Notebook and even Finding Nemo (he a sucker for Disney movies, the Lion King had him sobbing into her shirt). He was soft, yet rough, sensitive yet coated in a thick layer of bitter hard candy, an utter genius, but also so incredibly oblivious. He was enigmatic by perfect definition of the word, and that was all she could hope for.

Killing Scott McCall (Reader X Scott)

(PROMPT AND CHARACTER DESCRIPTION ABOVE LINE)

(IMAGINE BELOW LINE)

Prompt Request:

Y/N shows up on her first day of school and tries to kill Scott cause she’s a hunter but before she kills him he tells her that he’s a true alpha and she stops. Maybe a little romance idk.

Character Request:

Girl named Jaymie, 5'5, green eyes, straight black hair, bisexual, 17, wears black combat boots/leather jacket/skinny jeans, (very badass lol), rides a motorcycle, human but fights really well, Hunter.

——————————————————————

Everyone was turning heads when I arrived at Beacon Hills High School. I couldn’t tell if it was because I was the new girl, or because I rode a motorcycle to school while wearing all black.
Senior year of high school was going to be a breeze. My grades were always at an A+ average, I always made friends easily at a new school, and I’d have a little extra money from killing yet another alpha.

Scott McCall.

Don’t get me wrong, I don’t have a problem with werewolves. Not the yellow-eyed betas anyway. I did have a problem with blue-eyed betas and red-eyed alphas. Also known as killers. Murderers. Scott McCall was the next alpha on my list, just another killer. Today was the day I’d get it over with, and soon enough I would move on to another school.

“Hey, nice bike,” a voice from behind me said. I smiled, turning around to face the person I predicted it was. Scott.

“Thanks, just got it last month. My old one was trash.” I told him, taking off my helmet and running my hand through my hair.

“Wow..”

I looked at him with confusion. “What?”

“Sorry,” he laughed, shaking his head. “You just have really pretty eyes.”

Isn’t that cute. A killer pretending to be a nice guy.

“Anyway, what’s your name?” He asked. “I’m Scott.”

“Jaymie…” I said, about to walk away. Then the perfect idea hit me. “Hey, do you mind showing me around the school? I’m new.”

Scott nodded enthusiastically. “Sure, I’d love to.”

We walked down each hall, talking and laughing, both of us missing our first class. Things were going well so far. I’d have him dead in no time.

“You’re really funny,” he said, looking at me. He totally had a crush on me. Cute.

I giggled. “Hey, don’t fall in love with me just yet.” We both laughed, but I stopped when we were next to an empty classroom. “Can we go in there?” I asked. “I wanna look around.”

Scott shrugged. “Yeah, why not.”

We walked into the empty classroom, and I closed the door behind me. Then I leaned in for a kiss. Scott leaned in for the kiss, only to be stabbed in the back with a Chinese ring dagger that I had up my sleeve. He fell to his knees, blood coming from his mouth. His eyes turned red. The color of a killers eyes.

“Wh..why are you doing this?” Scott pleaded, trying to pull the dagger out of his back.

I narrowed my eyes. “Because you’re a killer. How else would you have became an alpha?”

His eyes widened. “I’ve n-never killed anyone… I’m a true.. Alpha.”

For a moment I thought my heart stopped. A true alpha. My first love.. The first person I had ever loved was a true alpha. She was killed by a blue-eyed beta that wanted her power.. It’s the reason I got into the business of hunting. Now here I was, about to kill a true alpha.

“Oh my god..” I whispered. “I’m so sorry dude, I didn’t know.”

“Could you possibly.. Pull your d-dagger..”

“Yeah.. Sorry.. I forgot.”

I grabbed the dagger by its handle and pulled it out of Scott’s back. He let out a sigh of relief and wiped some of the blood off his face with the back of his hand. I was overcome with guilt.

“Can we start over?” I asked. It had been awhile since I made a friend. This seemed like a weird time to start being a normal teenager again, but I needed to.

“I don’t know. You kind of just tried to kill me,” Scott said, staring at me.

“Then let me make it up to you,” I offered, helping him up. “I think we could be friends. Or more. You’re kinda cute.“

Blind Dates ~Johnny x Reader~

                Johnny passed by room, specifically {Name}’s room, and heard soft sobbing. He took a few steps back, facing the door he rose a brow in confusion. He knocked on her door a few times and in an instant the crying stopped. “{Name}, are you okay?” He called out.

                “Y-Yeah, is there something you need?” She answered.

                “No, no. I’ll be on my way then,” Johnny said. He faked the sound of footsteps walking away and waited a few moments. Then he heard it again, sobbing, it was a faint sound but still was able to be heard. He furrowed his eyebrows before giving out a small sigh and opening the door. He saw her scramble to her feet and turn her back on him. He saw her hands reach to her face, {Name} must’ve been wiping away the tears. “Are you sure you’re okay?”

                “I’m fine Johnny, really. Can you please just go?” She asked kindly, he could tell she wasn’t trying to stutter.

                “Nope! Not until you tell me what’s really wrong,” He responded.

                {Name} gave out a shaky sigh and plopped herself back onto the bed. Johnny crossed her room and joined her on the bed, looking at her tearstained face. He waited patiently, knowing that when {Name} was ready to talk, she’d talk.

                “You know, today alone I’ve been on two blind dates. Sue thought it’d be a good idea for me to get out there and start dating. She said I need someone, like she had Reed, Ben has Alicia, and you have you’re random hook ups. From afar the world sees us as heroes but up close we’re still pretty damn freaky,” {Name} spoke, laughing a little at her last words. “All the guys I’ve met so far had either ran away upon seeing me or stayed only to tell me it would never work out. It’s funny, girls absolutely love you for the exact thing you are. Ben, he has someone who can see the beauty in him even though she can’t actually see. Sue got the love her life even before she became who she is.

                As if I didn’t have trouble finding guys then but now, who would want to be with an aquatic freak? I always dreamt of finding a guy, getting married and starting a family but now when will that ever come true? Who’d want to start a family with someone who, if pushed to the limit, could easily drown the nearest person she sees? Even if it is an accident, that wouldn’t matter because I’d still be looked at as a monster. I’m so pathetic aren’t I?”

                There was a short moment of silence before Johnny spoke. “Sometime you can be a little eh.” “Oh shut up.” “Hold on, you didn’t let me finish. But any guy would be so lucky to have you and if they can’t see that then screw them. It’s there loss! And I… I would love to have a family… A family with you.”

                {Name} looked up at him, shocked at what he said. “You know, this really isn’t the time for games.”

                “I’m not joking. {Name} you are absolutely beautiful and I know I say that often but I mean it. You are amazing and incredibly sweet, you cool me down when I get too hot, literally. And like I said, any guy would be lucky to have you, so so lucky. And I would love to be the man in your world, because I find you so stunning that it honestly sometimes does hurt,” Johnny wasn’t lying, he was totally head over heels for her, something that rarely rarely happened.

                It wasn’t a secret that {Name} was also in love with the human torch, like any other girl she found him hot. He was the only one who didn’t see that however, exactly the reason why Sue set her up on so many blind dates. She thought it’d help {Name} get over her crush on Johnny since she knew exactly how her brother was like. But now, he was actually admitting his feeling for her and by the tone of his voice she could tell that he was being serious. Though Jonny has had a little practice in that area but this time she could tell that he really meant everything he was saying. Before he could continue, {Name} leaned up and connected her lips with him.

                Johnny was a little surprised but recovered quickly as he brought the girl on his lap. She wrapped her arms around his neck while he wrapped his around her waist. The kiss was rather passionate and heated and it would’ve been deeper had she not pulled away for air. Though that didn’t help as Johnny only brought her lips back onto his. The kisses only got deeper and soon Johnny’s hands started wondering around. She pulled away, for real this time, which made the male groan in frustration.

                “Wait, wait, I just wanna say that I love you Johnny, I love you so much,” She spoke sincerely, biting her lip slightly.

                “Is that so? Well good, because I love you too,” He responded. “Now, I believe we were in the middle of something.”

                And with that Johnny laid her on the bed before crawling on top of her for a night of long awaited activities.

A/N: Wow that was something… Haha I suck. I was re-watching Fantastic Four and got Johnny feels. So this happened! Honestly though I’m thinking about making a smut sequel if any of my Johnny Storm fans are interested. If you think it’s a great idea just let me know, probably do it anyway. Okay so request are always open just ask away! Bye bye!

vangilst  asked:

Pretty please. Writing prompt: Judy is escaping an ex boyfriend and nick comes in to save the day!

This was also done by funniesandboxes, who wrote a wonderful story! I was asked the same prompt! Check out theirs as well!

Not sure if you had platonic in mind. But… well… i always do. So.


Extra Whip:

Or, When Best Friends save you From Awful Exes


There were days where Judy needed to take a breath and do her very best to be reminded of all the good things on earth. Vegan nachos. Pink rubber bands. The occasional puddle of sunshine on her yoga mat. Some list of Things-That-Make-Judy’s-Day in order to remember that hands were meant for stretching out and not for curling tight and throwing at whatever animal was in closest proximity.

Especially if that animal was her ex.

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7

Fairy Tail Chapter 496 Reaction

This is Rainladyjuvia’s sister submitting the Ch.React because the artist is be stupid. I can’t explain why won’t submit this but whatever:

  • The first joke is funny as long as you ignore the fact that Gildarts said that the walking dead are weaker than their alive-counterparts.
  • The only thing we’ve seen Sting eat so far is an arrow and obesity but never forget that he can eat light.
  • Minerva is so done with this stupidity… she should have been Sabertooth’s guild master.
  • Gildarts got a daughter but only now did he become FATHER GILDARTS! Seriously, he’s all preachy now.
  • Rainladyjuvia looks at panels too much when doing Ch.Reacts. That’s why she notices small things like Romeo.
  • Rainladyjuvia wants Juvia and Gray to fight Invel (because that’s her ship) but I hope it’s Lyon and Gray (because Lyon is cooler than Juvia)

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Fandom: Bleach
Pairing: Ichigo/Orihime
Rating: G? T? Somewhere in between?
Genre: fluff/obligatory aliens
Word count: 1,929
request from ohirime ! who wanted a fic “where ichigo picks his oh so cute /and lost/ girlfriend orihime up from a train station on a very late hour and then they have a train ride together”

Today 6:17 PM

Hullo, Kurosaki-kun! ( ゚▽゚)/
What are you up to on
this gorge-mous Tokyo
afternoon? \(@ ̄∇ ̄@)/

Hey, Inoue.
Nothing much,
just waiting to pick up
my girlfriend at the
train station.
She’s a little late…
It’s more like evening…

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Hang In There (Chris)

This is seriously getting out of hand. Blame the exorjosh tag and @danji-doodle‘s beautiful comics for this shitty outcome of a Climbing Class fic. 

You can especially blame this comic for whatever the fuck I just wrote.

Summary: Now Josh didn’t believe in angels, or God in general really, but Chris could easily bring him down to his knees and pray. What would he pray for exactly?

Fic under the cut

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Listen

Fallout 4 : Nick Valentine insulte un sbire de Malone-le-chétif / Nick Valentine insults one of Skinny Malone’s henchmen

@synthsleuthing - sorry this first one is a bit long, but the conversation made me laugh so I had to record it.

Dino : Alors, Valentine ? T'as les crocs ? Tu voudrais bien quelque chose à becter, hein ? / Well, Valentine ? Are you starving ? I bet you’d like something to eat, huh?

Nick : J’résiste* toujours, abruti. Il sera plus de temps à Malone-le-chétif pour décider comment te faire la peau. / I’m still holding up, idiot. It won’t be much longer before Skinny Malone decides how to off you.

Dino : Arrête ton char, Valentine. T'es qu'un minable qui sait que dalle. / Oh come off it, Valentine. You’re just a loser who doesn’t know anything.

Nick : Tu crois ça ? Pourtant je l'ai vu écrire ton petit nom dans son carnet noir. Je crois même qu'il a dit “sale petit tricheur de mes deux**”. Ensuite, il a barré le nom trois fois. / You think so? Yet I saw him write your little name down in his black book. I think he even said “dirty, worthless** little traitor”. Then, he crossed out the name three times.

Dino : Barré trois fois ? Dans son carnet ? Mais j'ai jamais … Oh bon sang … Il faut que je règle ça, et vite ! / Crossed out three times? In his notebook? But I never… good grief … I need to fix this, quick!

*j’résiste - honestly I don’t understand this first word he says here (and I was too far to get subtitles), but this is the only thing that makes sense to me in context so. 

**de mes deux - this is just a funny phrase that I wanted to share. Translated literally, “of my two”, it means “worthless” but in this context “deux” is referring to testicles. So it’s like, “of my ballsack”, which obviously doesn’t make much sense, it’s just a vulgar way to say someone’s not worth shit.

Keep in mind I have never played the English version of this game so I have no clue what the original version has him saying, lmao

Remains of Heartbreak (an Ezria fanfic, anon request)

   Aria and Ezra have been back together for about a month now.  Ever since the roof incident, Aria realized that a life without Ezra is not the life she wants. The couple began again as friends, until Aria pushed it forward. She found it hard to resist him. A friendly handshake turned into a handhold, which became a hug and then a kiss. But it had yet to go much further than that, for the risk of ruining the relationship they fought so hard for was on both of their minds. 

   Everything is slowly falling back into place. It’s her senior year and Aria’s workload is dwindling slowly, meaning that apartment 3B sees a lot of the petite brunette. She never really pictured herself as a domestic wife type, but somehow being at home with Ezra didn’t seem so unappealing. And it was becoming all the more realistic. Talk of graduation and college and moving out of the small town called Rosewood was chattered throughout the halls of high school, home, and on skype with her three best friends. She knew that she and Ezra needed to discuss this too, but she had conveniently avoided it whenever he tried to broach the topic. It’s not that she didn’t want to create this wonderful future with him, outside of Rosewood. But she was nervous. Scared of a few things. Ezra would have to pick up his life and follow her if she even got accepted into college. Aria was a smart girl, there was no doubt of that. But she had her heart set on New York City, the bustle and the crowds. It was New York or nothing, and an envelope in the mail stamped for today held her fate.

   Aria was in her room, listening to some music by the Fray and twirling a piece of hair while she scribbled through her calculus homework. She always saved English for last. Her buzzing phone caught her attention.

It’s probably today, right? - E

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Okay so! Ive got a LOTTA bit to tell you guys.. (and maybe to Jack and Mark too if they see this at all.. highly doubt it..)

Ive added the keep reading so i dont think you guys can take a peek of it on mobile. Its fairly long, so i wanna spare you guys the agony of scrolling through my opinion once more..

My heart is going to be poured out.. so this will be sad.. read with caution.

——————————————————————-

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6

The WWE’s Biggest Fan: John Glick

His unofficial title is “The WWE’s Biggest Fan”, but to anyone who knows him, it might as well be his full name. John Glick is a guy I met at OVW sometime in 2004, and his tales of travel intrigued me. He claimed to have been to several WWE events, ranging from the house shows to TV shows to pay per views, and at first, I found this extremely hard to believe. Whether it was disbelief or sheer jealousy, I was still amazed that John had so many stories to tell.

After browsing his MySpace page, my doubts were shattered as John had met nearly every WWE superstar on the roster. For years, his goal was to meet The Rock, as he was the only major star Glick hadn’t met, but even the Hollywood A-lister wasn’t too far out of reach for a superfan such as John Glick.

If you name a wrestler, Glick’s eyes light up as he recalls a fond memory with said superstar. The funny thing is, after being at so many events, several of your favorite superstars recognize him immediately. At the Royal Rumble, after John Cena’s victory, he ran and jumped into the arms of Glick. At WrestleMania XXX, when The Undertaker lost, a close-up of Glick was shown. His storage collection includes several chairs, which are given to WWE fans who get seats in the first 5 rows at pay per views. He’s maxed out several credit cards, attended hundreds of WWE events, and has been to the last 34 pay per views, in a row, simply as a fan! With all of this being said, I don’t believe there’s any contesting that he, without a doubt, is the WWE’s biggest fan!

Noragami YATORI Fanfiction - Lovesick Puppy.

Anime: Noragami

Pairing: Yato x Hiyori (Yatori)

Rated: K+

Genre: Romance

It was annoying, thought a black haired minor god, fiddling in the pockets of his black, worn out jersey.

 It was very, very annoying. It was extremely annoying.

 “Arf, arf!”

 Yato clenched his teeth from the super annoying sound the source of annoyance made. As some of you might have guessed, the source of annoyance for Yato was none other than a tiny puppy ; a beagle pup to be exact. While on one of their ‘jobs’, Yato, Hiyori and Yukine had encountered a lost puppy who taken a liking to Hiyori. And this annoyed Yato. A lot. Why? Because Hiyori was so busy playing with the puppy, she had almost forgotten about Yato!(At least, that’s what Yato thought)

 He gave another mean glare at the puppy who whimpered slightly.

 “Aw, what’s wrong? Don’t cry! I’m here for you! Give me a toothy smile! That’s a good boy!” said Hiyori, lovingly cuddling the puppy in her hands. 

 Yato snapped. This was the last straw.

 “Can’t you get rid of that thing? It’s interrupting me while Yukine and I are doing our jobs!” he shot at Hiyori.

 Hiyori paused from cuddling the puppy to give Yato a cold look.

 “He’s not doing anything and he isn’t biting anybody. I don’t see any problem with it,’ she answered.

 Yukine had to literally pinch himself to stop from bursting out with laughter at his master’s behavior. The idiot was acting like a jealous boyfriend over what a tiny, miniscule puppy. It was hilarious.

 “He is doing something! He’s being annoying! The way he makes all those stupid barking noises and whimpering from time to time makes me sick!” said Yato.

 Hiyori gasped in indignity, totally oblivious to why Yato was acting this way.

 “It’s just doing what a normal puppy would do! And it’s only whimpering because it misses it’s owner. Can’t you see that?” she said annoyed.

 Yukine, the silent observe noticed a vein popping on Yato’s head.

 Ignoring what Hiyori had said, Yato decided to attack the puppy on another matter.

 “Not to mention you’re telling me that we have to find its owner? I have enough work to do than to take care of silly little puppies,” said Yato, getting increasingly more edgy.

 "What work?” retorted Hiyori. “This is your first job in three days and you were lamenting to me that you had no other jobs. I don’t see why we can’t take it back to its home,”

 Yato felt a sword stab him in the back. What Hiyori said was true. But…but…

 “Oh!” gasped Hiyori in mild surprise when suddenly the dog jumped and licked the tip of Hiyori’s nose.

 Yukine couldn’t wait to see what would happen next. He could literally see smoke coming out from Yato’s ears.

 “That does it!” said Yato loudly. “We’re getting rid of that thing this instant!”

 Hiyori, who had been thanking the little puppy for its sign of affection, stood up to her full height, her hands still holding on to the puppy.

 “What’s the matter with you?” she asked Yato now a bit angry. “Your mood’s been horrible this whole evening! I don’t underst-wait, Yato, are you allergic to dogs?”

 Hiyori hadn’t considered that possibility before. It would explain his ratty behavior.

 Yukine wondered if Yato would lie just to get rid of the puppy. But Yato was better than that, apparently.

 “I-It’s,” started Yato, with shaking fists and red ears. “It’s just…just…you…you…WHY ARE YOU PAYING SO MUCH ATTENTION TO A DARN PUPPY?”

 Yato finally exploded.

 Hiyori was flabbergasted.

 W-What?”

 Yato was panting slightly.

 “You get puppies everywhere. And this one’s not exactly very cute either. Yet all this time, you’ve only had your eyes…and maybe your nose on that thing!” he added spitefully.

 “….huh?” asked Hiyori, still painfully clueless.

 Yato couldn’t stand it. Yato couldn’t bear it. Why was Hiyori paying more attention to a puppy than to him? He had known her longer, spent time with her longer and had been through a lot more with her that that little brown ball of fur!

 “You haven’t talked to me at all ever since that puppy came to you. Yukine and I matter much to you as a lamppost. Don’t you think you’re being rude to both Yukine and I by ignoring us?” asked Yato, nearly in tears.

 He was probably adding Yukine into the picture because he didn’t want to mention only himself.

 Hiyori was only slowly starting to digest things.

 Yato sniffed lightly.

 “At the rate things are going, you’ll forget all about us because you’re with that puppy!” he finished mournfully.

 Hiyori who had so far had a half-angry/half puzzled expression suddenly started giggling.

 Yato was outraged. Here he was pouring out his emotions and Hiyori was laughing at him? It hurt him so much.

 “What’s so funny?!” he shot at her.

 “Y-You,” said Hiyori, in between giggled. “You’re so funny, Yato,”

 Yato opened his mouth to protest but suddenly he felt Yukine speak to him in his head, ‘Let her explain,’

 He had to do something for that stupid idiot of a master he had once in a while.

 Hiyori continued.

 “Yato…you’re jealous of the puppy, aren’t you?” asked Hiyori.

 Yato spluttered, caught red handed.

 “What? Me? Jealous? Of that thing? Hahahaha!” he said, his voice unnatural.

 Hiyori saw through it.

 “You are,” she said. “You are jealous Yato. I can’t believe you could be jealous of a puppy!”

 “Neither can I,” thought Yukine.

 “I-I-I,” stammered Yato. “Anyway! Pay attention to me and Yukine too! Or we’ll get lonely!”

 "Stop dragging me into this,” thought Yukine.

 Hiyori smiled, this time, sincerely.

“I understand,” she said. “I’ll pay attention to you and Yukine-kun too,”

 Yato’s ears were still red and his cheeks were getting a bit red too because of seeing Hiyori’s beautiful smile. He was afraid that his face would go completely red if he looked at her right now, so his eyes were glancing furtively, here and there.

 “Y-Yeah. You do that. Otherwise you’ll become so obsessed with puppies and other animals that you’ll forget me,” he said sulkily.

 He didn’t add Yukine this time.

 Hiyori blinked. Then she smiled sadly. He was still worried about that.

 Yato was still staring at the ground when suddenly he felt a pair of warm, soft hands grab his own sweaty ones. He looked up and saw Hiyori smiling at him.

 Too close…!

“H-Hiyori! What are you doing? Your hands will get sweaty too!” he said, trying very hard not to stammer.

 His face was definitely red now.

 Hiyori continued to hold Yato’s hands.

 “I’ll never forget you Yato,” she said softly.

 Yato gulped.

 “E-Even if you had all the puppies in Japan?”  he asked.

 Hiyori held onto his hands tighter.

 “Even if I had all the puppies in the world, they don’t hold a candle to how important you are to me,”

 Yukine sighed.

 Really, Yato had no right to complain about puppies. Yato himself had to be the biggest lovesick puppy in the universe.

 Fin.

reasons you should be watching Fox’s Lucifer
  • based on Neil Gaiman’s Lucifer from the Sandman/spinoff 
  • i’ll repeat that
  • based on Neil Gaiman’s character Lucifer
  • (Neil Gaiman
  • starring Hottie McHotStuff, aka Tom Ellis

Originally posted by brotherlyfeels

  • also the precious, no-nonsense cupcake that is Lauren German

Originally posted by lucifer-morningstar-love

  • basic plot is that Lucifer got sick of hell and decided to move to Los Angeles 
  • because of course he did 
  • he owns a nightclub
  • because of course he does 
  • and he and Chloe (the before mentioned precious cupcake) solve crimes/bitch/banter together wonderfully
  • and that’s the gist 
  • other important things to note: 
  • asks serious questions about morality for a comedy show 
  • quickly switches from funny to scary without being jarring
  • bisexual!devil. or pansexual!devil. or hell, omnisexual!devil. point is he doesn’t have time for heteronormativity BS
  • badass Mazikeen 

Originally posted by calebhaaaas

  • divorced single mother with full time job remains better than you 
  • daughter of said mother is adorable 

Originally posted by kyloskywlker

  • snark
  • PUNS
  • attempts to play fetch with “small humans” 

Originally posted by paceingcolin

  • oh, and there are only three episodes out so far, so you can catch up like THAT. go on. you know you want to 
  • …that’s it
  • please watch this show
  • thank 
  • <3

anonymous asked:

Why are people thinking that oliver set felicity up with that plan I i i don't get it, oliver says "I can't get close enough to slade to give him the cure" felicity says "don't let him out think you" and at that moment it seemed like a light went off in their heads,I'm betting she came up with the plan knowing that she might be able to get close enough to slade if she was taken saying the I love you was olivers idea knowing that slade would take her, olicity trust each other with their lives

I have to go back and watch the episode again, to be honest, because I know my brain stopped absorbing information at a certain point out of sheer shock. LOL.

From what I remember, the information as presented, could be interpreted a few ways — either they had the plan together from that Queen Consolidated scene OR Felicity only realized what Oliver was angling toward the moment he pressed the syringe into her hand at the mansion and said, “Do you understand?”

The island stuff at the end seemed to indicate that Felicity didn’t know until that moment (again, I have to go back and watch it), but what I think the important debate is is… was Oliver, at the Queen Mansion, lying when he said what he said to Felicity?  Because I don’t think so, especially not after the way it was done.

(oops! lopping it off here for easy scrolling!)

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