“Alright, one more before I give up– a nurse is wheeling a patient down a hallway. The patient asks her ‘Nurse, where are we going?’ The nurse answers ‘To the morgue.’ ‘But I’m not dead yet!’ The patient protests. ‘Well, we are not there yet, either,’ answers the nurse.”
how do you keep four birds from going to the bathroom all over the house while they're inside?
there are very rarely four birds in the house and i have a few things like bird nappies, towels down, trying to keep them on hard floors etc etc but the truth is i just do dumb impulsive shit like letting birds inside and then spend a lot of my life cleaning up after them
someone asked for this, so here it is (also sorry i’m supes lazy and this is way delayed)
First up, we’ve got Stephanie Rice, a classic preacher’s daughter from Texas (TBH I am SHOOK there were no “Son of a Preacher Man” jokes since Dusty Springfield was bi, but ok). She actually had a beautiful and kind of emotional backstory, but I don’t know how to internet, so I couldn’t find it. Even though Blake also turned, obvi she went #teamgwen. Her and her fiancee are both wearing cute, semi-matching hats, which, like, ok.
Next up, Sammie Zonana, also from Texas. I saw Sammie and was like I would bet she’s on our team, but there’s already a wlw. No way there can be another. Oh, how glad I was to be wrong. Sammie’s rockin a sweet vest (hint #1) and her adorable fiancee watches from backstage. BTW she’s also #teamgwen (which makes it 20% wlw, fun fact, and really makes it come full circle for all of the ladies like me who were wayyy too into that no doubt look)
Finally, we have Sheena Brooke, from my home state of Florida (wow where else have there ever been three Southern queers on one mainstream show) who may just have my fave voice of our trio. I must admit, I also got Vibes™
when I saw Sheena, but again, I was like 2 ladies already? No way we’re going to get spoiled with a third. And then she introduced her adorable wife… Thanks to Adam hitting his button, our Sapphic S³
Congrats, the Voice, on NBC, may be the gayest show on TV, or at least cable. Stay strong my southern sapphics, and best of luck in the battles to come. TBH I never expected to blog about the voice on my queer-fangirling blog (or however you categorize this mess) but here we are. Crazy world.
Friendly reminder that Patroclus should not be remember simply as “Achilles’ bitch”.
Friendly reminder that Patroclus was a little shit. He had the power, the looks and the skills, and he knew it. Not only he excelled at battle; he did it while taunting his enemies all the fucking time cause he was going to win and he knew it.
Friendly reminder that he was the one guy who got to call out on Achilles, something no one else dared to do. In fact, men went to ask him to call out on Achilles because everyone was scared of him. Except for Patroclus.
Friendly reminder that Patroclus had advanced medical knowledge, something extremly rare at the time. He healed many of his friends and comrades during battle. Hadn’t it been for him, many great warriors would have died.
Friendly reminder that Patroclus was loyal to a fault. He was always by Achilles’ side in battle. He never disobeyed Achilles orders. The one time he did, was the time he died.
Friendly reminder that Patroclus was kind and had a soft heart. He cried because while Achilles’ Rage lasted, he wouldn’t let any of his men enter battle, Patroclus included. And while Achilles’ troops were hiding in their ships, the rest of the Greek army got crushed. Patroclus felt so powerless and helpless because he couldn’t do nothing as he saw his comrades dying.
Friendly reminder that Patroclus had a character crisis. He had to decide whether obeying his Lord’s commands and abandoning his friends in battle, or going against his Lord’s wishes and engaging fight.
Friendly reminder that he refused to stay behind like a coward. He chose to enter battle, but since he was a honourable man he told Achilles about it. Friendly reminder that he managed to sway Achilles’ Rage. Friendly reminder that he managed to convince Achilles to let their troops rejoin the war, thus returning the victory to the Greeks.
Friendly reminder that Patroclus was flawed. He committed hubris. He got so battle drunk and was so excited by the prospect of finally ending the war, that he disobeyed Achilles’ direct command not to fight near the walls of Troy, and chased the Troyans back to the limits of the city. To the place Achilles had specifically told him not to go because it would be too dangerous. Friendly reminder that this one flaw is his downfall.
Friendly reminder that Patroclus doesn’t go down without giving one hell of a fight. Friendly reminder that Patroclus was so strong that Apollo (the God that protected Troy and Hector [Troy’s heir to the throne]) had to face him and repel him four times.Four times. A god. If that ain’t badass, then I don’t know what could be. In the fourth time, Apollo got inside Patroclus’ head and made him dizzy. Patroclus fell and Apollo removed him from his armour- Achilles’ armour. Patroclus ended up unprotected, vulnerable and dizzy in the middle of the battle field; so a random dude saw the opportunity and stabbed his back with a spear. But was that enough to make him go down? Oh heck no. The pain snapped him out of the dizziness. Patroclus realized he was in a very troublesome situation so he decided to fall back… but at that moment Hector engaged him in battle. And Patroclus wouldn’t retire from a direct combat, oh heck he wouldn’t. Even though he knew this was probably the way he would die, he fought with his all.
Friendly reminder that lacking his armor, tired from battle, with a spear wound on his back and only Achilles’ sword left as weapon, Patroclus faced Hector, Troy’s greatest warrior and didn’t fear.
Friendly reminder that when Hector sheathed his spear in Patroclos’ stomach, Patroclus thought about the love of his life.
Friendly reminder that with his last breath Patroclus smiled at Hector and told him “You are a dead man. This will be your downfall”. Friendly reminder that until his last moment, he was a little shit.
Friendly reminder that Patroclus is a flawed, well-rounded, badass character and that he deserves so much more than his current position as “Achilles’s love interest”.