One-armed Bandit Tarot

*Slot Machine Spread*

The archetypical slot machine typically have three reels of symbols, but there’s nothing wrong with adding more reels (rows of cards) if you are so inclined and if it fits a particular reading you would want to do.

In this example, I will use 3 card reads, which literally could be anything that’s supposed to be read in a linear fashion (past, present, future - mind, body, spirit etc.)

You will need: A deck of cards, a coin or something similar (like a stone)  and at least one six-sided die.

With your, or your clients question in mind, shuffle the cards in your normal fashion. Cut the deck as normal, and deal out three rows of cards, each with six cards in them.

Offer a coin as a symbolic gesture. This could be a magical coin if you have that, or you could make one for this specific purpose, or if you like to do post-apocalyptic witchcraft, you could use a bottle cap, or any kind of stone or an object of symbolic value to you or your client would do. 

Pull an imaginary lever. Roll the die one time for each row. Turn over the card corresponding with the number on the die. There you have your results.

You could variants on this if you would like. Like for instance, use more rows, as mentioned, or put more, or less, cards in each row, if you own polyhedric dice. You know, D4, D6, D8, D10, D12, D20. Or use a random number generator either online or on an app on your phone. 

You could even turn all the cards over before rolling the dice and pretend you are allowed to step up or down a number of times in order to make a more favourable read. 

Have fun! 

So here’s an actual read with the One-Armed Bandit slot machine spread I came up with the other day. You can read the original post with a “how to” by clicking the link. 

You can see that I rolled 2, 2 and 6. The Four of Pentacles didn’t quite fit and/or I didn’t really see how it related to my question. So decided to “step up” one card and that made much more sense, and was definitely something I had hoped for regarding the outcome. 

I’ve got some more thoughts and suggestions though, if you’d like to try it out. 

1. If you have one of those mini versions of tarot decks, then that could be easier and more handy if you don’t have enough space. 
2. You might consider using only 9 cards total. Still three rows, but with only 3 cards in each one. And then use the 6 sided die as a D3:

1-2 = 1
3-4 = 2
5-6 = 3

Writing the code for the DrunkenSailorOMat is a lot more straightforward than expected yet also very complex. And yes its as silly as it sounds.

Also: Please send me all verses of “what shall we do with the drunken sailor” that you know. It’s for university and I need as many as possible.


(Re)watching The Dukes Of Hazzard: 1x01 One Armed Bandits

UNCLE JESSE: This time, you’ve gone too far.
BO: Now, Jesse… All we…
UNCLE JESSE: Where’d you get them?
BO: Sheriff Rosco snuck them in on a truckload full of fertilizer.
LUKE: So we hijacked the truck.
UNCLE JESSE: You mean, you stole these gambling machines AND a truck?
BO: Yeah!… Well, we left the truck in front of the Sheriff’s office.
UNCLE JESSE: And what about these?
LUKE: Well, we was just thinking that maybe…
UNCLE JESSE: Young man! You think again! You know good and well that this family don’t hold with no gambling.
BO: Now Jesse, we’ve been making moonshine for over 200 years.. Now.. Why is gambling different?
UNCLE JESSE: Because making whiskey was a family tradition long before there was a U. S. of A. Federal Government to tell us that we couldn’t. And passing a law didn’t change the family ways.
LUKE: Yeah, but this is something different…
UNCLE JESSE: And besides, when we was making corn whiskey, we paid taxes on the corn. Gambling’s a vice. How are you gonna tax vice? Now then, I’m going in there and I’m gonna collect my eggs. And when I come back down here, I don’t wanna see anything but hind ends and elbows as you two boys are loading them there machines on that there truck. AND don’t go selling them at a profit. That’d be wrong too.
BO: What do you think?
LUKE: I think I’m tired of you always getting us into trouble and me having to think a way out.

anonymous asked:

Can you make a head cannon were Tony is being annoying and so Steve and Bucky decide to just make out in front of him when ever they see him just to get him to quit talking.

I kinda just wrote a thing? I regret nothing. 

Bucky had just about had enough of Tony Stark.

Oh it wasn’t just the nicknames. Robo-cop, one armed bandit, frosty, winter psycho. Yeah no. Those didn’t bother him as much as the jabs.

It wasn’t even the remarks he made about him and about what he’d done, as if he had any idea what Bucky had been through.

No. It was what he said about Steve.

About him not being good enough. About how he wasn’t special. All the old virgin jokes and how he wasn’t good with people. About how he was only pretending to be a good man.

Yeah those really got to Bucky.

But when Tony Stark decided it was a good idea to start teasing Steve about never getting a date, well that was the last straw.

Steve and Bucky had been together since they were 16 years old. Sure it had gotten complicated what with the war and hydra and 80 years apart but what they hell, they figured it out.

And they were together again.

Tony Stark wasn’t privy to that information because they liked having something to themselves. Something that wasn’t all over the media to be debated. Something they didn’t have to defend.

But Bucky decided screw that, because for once in his life he was going to make Tony Stark speechless.

So the next time he said something Bucky muttered a quick “Fuck you” in Tony’s direction before slipping into Steve’s lap and kissing him senseless.

Steve had always been a sucker for his lips so he knew three seconds into it he would cave and kiss him back.

The fact that he always caved in made Bucky very smug.

After kissing him for a little more time than necessary Bucky pulled away and looked at Stark who was standing there wide eyed, mouth open but no words coming out.

Bucky smirked at him and then turned to look at Steve who was blushing and clearing his throat.

“Thought we talked about not doing that yet Buck…” Steve whispered to him, no anger in his voice, just a question as to why he’d do it now of all times.

“Stark needed to shut up and the only way to get him to was to shock him into silence. What better way to shock him than to show him not only do you have a date tonight, but for the rest of your life, and that you’re getting laid regularly.” Bucky says loud enough for Tony to hear him.

Tony just starts making small sounds of protest, but no coherent words come out of his mouth. Just the oddest sounds and he kept pointing at Steve and Bucky and then looked at someone else in the room like they were supposed to be surprised with him.

Natasha, Sam and Clint all looked bored. Making comments like “Already knew,” and “About damn time,” and “Can we get Pizza for lunch?”

Rhodey was covering his eyes with his hand like he was done dealing with children. And Bruce wasn’t even paying attention.

Steve let out a long suffering sigh and shook his head.

“Really Buck? That’s how you’re getting him to…” Steve couldn’t finish because Bucky was kissing him again. And he just kept kissing him. Steve made a sound of protest, but after thirty seconds he gave into kisses and held onto him softly.

Steve would give Bucky anything and everything he wanted, and if he wanted to make-out in front of their friends, well. He was going to do it and not feel bad about it. They’d been apart too long for him to care anymore. It was a plus that it was messing with Tony’s head.

Tony eventually started talking again, trying to annoy them into paying attention to him, but Bucky figured out very quickly that kissing Steve was enough of a distraction he didn’t really care anymore.

“Really? Making out on my couch? Why isn’t anyone else as surprised by this revelation as I am? Am I the last one to find out? Seriously?” Tony’s voice eventually broke their little bubble of happy kissing and Bucky pulled back to glare at him.

“Shut it Stark I’m kissin my fella and your voice is a total turn off.” Bucky spat at him and then turned around to kiss Steve again.

Tony didn’t know what to do or say about that.

From then on out whenever Bucky wanted to shut Tony up all he had to do was to kiss Steve. Didn’t matter if it was a peck or a make-out session. It always made Tony falter and made Bucky smirk.

If it ever wore off Bucky wasn’t sure what he was going to do, but for now it was the only way to shut him up for a minute and he’d take it.

Steve didn’t seem to mind all that much.

Hold ‘em

Originally posted by dazzlingkai

//Chen x you ❤️‍

Word count: 4,063

Summary: you deal the cards, and Chen gambles to win.

I wanted to write something about poker, and it’s just about poker. Sex here is a side thing, the main thing is poker.

You dread it before you even put the high-heels on. You dread it every night, yet you do it.

Carefully you slip your feet into your black, classic high-heels. Your left heel is plastered over with band-aids, but it hides behind now softened leather. You move your ankles around to make sure your feet are comfortable, and then you stand up. You look at yourself in the mirror of your locker, you fix your hair, smoothing stranded lock back in. You smile at your reflection, the last real smile of the night, and you shut the locker.

Keep reading


jaga jazzist - endless galaxy

one of the only tracks i don’t have by this group, this vinyl/japanese-only release first made its way into my life when a bunch of bmx'ers from sweden spent a week camped in their rv in my driveway, after meeting my roommate at the dirt jumps downtown. one of the swedes found it on spotify (i think?) after i mentioned their music, and then i somehow forgot about it afterwards until now. they also helped me translate some of the song titles by searching for norwegian/swedish cognates.

endless galaxy’ is a b-side from their most recent album, 2010’s one-armed bandit, and is dramatically more complex and conclusive than the discarded outtakes from most other bands in the world. but then again, that’s why i consider them to be my favorite group; there’s literally more going on within this track, more diversity and melodic intrigue, than entire albums typically succeed in providing.

the abstract drum entrance 4/5’s of the way in (on top of ambient bass and acoustic guitar, and sputtering synth) evokes in rainbows-era radiohead at their best, a side-splitting delivery of irreverent freedom that creates a fleeting experience of disorientation, closely followed by blissful rhythmic resolution. as you’d probably expect, this functions as a segue into the theremin solo. ’endless galaxy’ is the perfect phrase to describe their astronomically evocative take on progressive electronic jazz. 

Made with SoundCloud