one way in and the same way out

The next morning, Gabe woke up to a faint yet annoying buzzing sound, flailing his arms around the head to prevent from any mosquito bites, and at the same time stretching out and yawning as the light outside made it’s way to his eyes, it still felt strange, the air, the sounds, everything except for the familiar call for him of his mother, as she was finishing up putting the last plate on the table, and a glass of freshly made juice. He slowly got up from bed and put on his red slippers, and making his way down to the kitchen, the smell of toast and juice made him feel hungry as he sat in front of one of the plates, saying drowsy: “Good morning ma”, caringly Mrs. Reyes got his plates to put a warm toast with some nicely spread butter, kissing him on the head happily replying: “Good morning sweetie”.

           It was a sunny sunday that one, lots of bugs buzzing, and birds chirping in the distance, with his red shirt with a small skull in the center he made his way to the hedge, moving some branches apart to make way for him, and as his head approached the space the hole was blocked by Jack almost screaming: “GOOD MORNING CITY KITTY! “. Startled, Gabe fell on his back putting an arm in his chest as he breathed heavily, with his vision slightly failing from the scare he made out the shape of the bunny making it’s way through the hedge: “Hehehehe, sorry to scare you, I guess I should call you a scaredy kitty now ?”. Jack said smugly. Grumpying up his face and huffing a bit from sanger both of the commentary and the scare he replied: “hunf… at least I don’t have silly ears”. Giving up an air of arrogance, as he suddenly felt guilty, apologizing right after, blushing a bit from embarrassment, both for him falling and saying such a rude thing for just a joke.

           The two started playing some time after their moms agreed to it, jack left fastly holding Gabe through his arm, making his way to some bunched up bushes with a strangely familiar sound behind them: “C’mon I want to show you something”, Jack said as they made their way to the other side, facing them was a little river with several beautiful rocks and a special shine due to the sun light, the kitty was a bit amazed by the sight he had never seen such a clean and transparent river before, one where he could even see the fishes swimming by, his excitement and joy were made visible as a big smile appeared in his face, Jack giggled a bit, proceeding to walk forward a bit and crouching near the water: “So what do you think ? They have rivers like this at the city?”, still aroused by the image Gabe replied: “no… not like this one, it’s so clean, and also shallow too! I bet we can touch the bottom easily”, making his way next to the rabbit as his hand made way to the rocks underneath the surface, his tail however wiggled it’s way to Jack’s, enticing itself to the fluffy bunny tail.

           “Wanna cross it?”, Jack said, as he got up in a pinch, preparing to jump on the rocks ahead, before Gabe could even express his concern, the bunny was already on the other side, waiting for him reaching out his hand to help the kitten, Gabe in a moment of courage jumped on the rocks until he reached the last one located near but also a bit far from the other side, he stood there for a bit until he crouched and started sobbing of fear, Jack tried to reach out to him but failing nonetheless: “Come on Gabe, I know you can make it ! I’m here to catch you”, Gabe then followed up to jump in the rabbit’s direction, with some tears running down his cheeks, but as he landed his foot slipped on a weak patch of moist dirt, hitting his knees on the process. Jack then carried him on his back apologizing for the incident, carrying him to their next stop on the “Jack Morrison’s worldwide famous forest tour”, making the cat smile bit holding his tail in the other’s.

anonymous asked:

Caretaker, I've been wanting to ask this person on a date for months now, but I just get too nervous to do it and I'm not sure they see me in the same way. Could I have some advice? I offer a broken lightbulb, the quiet of early morning sunrises, and the high pitched ringing I always hear.

THERES ONLY ONE WAY TO FIND OUT FUCKO

anonymous asked:

My ace/aro awakening happened a while ago. I got into a relationship and my bf was a really really nice guy. He was always supportive and amazing but the longer I was in a relationship the more I realized I didn’t understand it? I made myself feel like sh-t because I wasn’t able to feel the same way he felt about me. Then one day he told me he loved me and it all clicked into place that I just was incapable of feeling the same and that I’ve been this way since I was young.

im just glad you realized it!!! you dont want to break anyone’s heart u know it sucks that u had to go through a relationship to figure it out

She’s the betta half of the two

6

who would win, two fierce warriors or one party guy

  1. read classics - I know from experience its a slow but steady climb when it comes to reading classics, but it’s a worth while experience to put yourself in world that so different from the world now but mirrors it quite the same. Reading classical opens you mind to how simple but complex the human race is. It might seem like chore especially if your not a reader but you can start by just picking a classical that ficinated you the most  and listening to it on audiobook first. After a couple times of listening on audiobook you’ll get used to rhythm of the language and it’ll be easier to continue reading on your own. Also, pro tips- if you really wanna kick it up a notch, write a short review for every classic you read to help retain the info. 
  2. expand your genres-  Everyones knows there’s a lot to be learned from movies, tv show and music but for most of us, once we learn what kind of genres we like we tend to never branch out and this limits our learning. You don’t have to like every genre but exposing yourself to different styles of music and movies teaches you tolerance and after a while of forcing yourself to do this, you might find your pallet start to shift.  
  3. watch youtube videos- This is one of my favorite ways to not only be entertained but to get a general overview of a certain topic, usually if it sparks my interest i’ll do a little further research. Youtube channels such as ted-ed, asap science, scishow and today i found out do an amazing job of giving you a little bit of knowledge about everything.
  4. listen to people who have different opions than you- I know this one is particularly hard one for most people, but your going to learn the least from having repeptive conversations with people with the same ideas as you. People with different opinions than you will have an impact on how you live your life wether you like it or not; its not your job to accept their ways of thinking but to understand why they think the way they do- you never know, you might just find that the other persons opinion has some merit and might make you more knowlegable about a certain situation. A great way to do this is to watch interviews, read articles about the opposing side of your opinion.
  5. Accept that you’ll never know everything- This is an important one, you may be thinking, how does this have to do with educating myself? well, I added this one because I truly feel like you can’t educate yourself without acknowledging your ignorance. A person who thinks they know eveything has no room to learn. One of the most powerful ways to educate your self is to accept that you are never going to be finished learning, this opens you up and makes you more receptive to lessons we learn in life everyday. So in short, if you want to be more educated, just live! we’re all life long students and that’s okay. 

anonymous asked:

One thing that bothers me with fanon is when people dumb Keith down. Like, this is a kid who was considered the best pilot of his generation at a military/space place; NASA's people are some of the smartest on the planet and the Garrison is so similar to them! But yet everyone think's he's not as smart as some of the other characters simply because he's more aggressive or because he didn't get the team chant Lance made.

LISTEN I LITERALLY SUFFER THROUGH “INTRO” TO ASTRONOMY AND ALL THE MATHING I MUST DO BECAUSE I CANNOT MATH AND!! KEITH WAS TOP OF HIS CLASS AT SPACE SCHOOL THAT BOY CAN MATH AND HE’S DAMN GOOD AT IT 

So he’s definitely book smart in my mind because I feel it would be difficult for him to be number one in such a prestigious academy otherwise. Particularly in its most competitive program (fighter pilot). There are of course other indications of intelligence, and the primary ones singled out are usually: musical-rhythmic and harmonic, visual spatial, verbal-linguistic, logical-mathematical, bodily-kinesthetic, interpersonal, intrapersonal, and naturalistic. So, let’s take a look at what Keith falls under:

  • Visual-spatial: Think in terms of physical space, as do architects and sailors. Very aware of their environments. They like to draw, do jigsaw puzzles, read maps, daydream. They can be taught through drawings, verbal and physical imagery. Tools include models, graphics, charts, photographs, drawings, 3-D modeling, video, videoconferencing, television, multimedia, texts with pictures/charts/graphs.” (source)
  • Evidence: Just take a look at Keith’s incredibly all encompassing and thorough assessment of data he’s gathered from the desert and this is incredibly clear. You’ll see pictures, charts, maps, visually illustrated points of how everything connects–it’s clear he’s a very visual learner. To the point where, when Hunk sketches out the Fraunhofer line, Keith immediately picks it out as a clear match for the mountain range. That demonstrates a true command of visual-spacial awareness. 
  • Verbal-linguistic:Using words effectively. These learners have highly developed auditory skills and often think in words. They like reading, playing word games, making up poetry or stories. They can be taught by encouraging them to say and see words, read books together. Tools include computers, games, multimedia, books, tape recorders, and lecture.” (same source)
  • Evidence: Keith’s funny comment that, “I don’t think you’re using that word correctly,” seems to imply that he’s able to catch onto the meaning of unfamiliar words pretty easily. But more indicatively–“they can be taught by encouraging them to say and see words.” Words hold a certain power with Keith, as evidenced by the way he reverts to repeating Shiro’s mantra of “Patience yields focus,” whenever he needs to calm down and concentrate. He finds comfort in those words and hearing them. This seems to suggest an auditory inclination. 
  • Logical-mathematical: “Reasoning, calculating. Think conceptually, abstractly and are able to see and explore patterns and relationships. They like to experiment, solve puzzles, ask cosmic questions. They can be taught through logic games, investigations, mysteries. They need to learn and form concepts before they can deal with details.” (same source)
  • Evidence: Again, I think “exploring patterns and relationships,” falls under the work we see on Keith’s conspiracy theory board. And as previously stated, his rank at the garrison is most likely indicative of this. He’s also capable of abstract thinking–such as connecting with the desert’s “strange energy” as well as logic-based. The ability to put things together and “solve puzzles” is also clearly shown through how Keith is able to quickly address a situation and come to the right conclusion–such as how something wasn’t right on Naxzela and it’s connection to Voltron
  •  Bodily-kinesthetic: “Use the body effectively, like a dancer or a surgeon. Keen sense of body awareness. They like movement, making things, touching. They communicate well through body language and be taught through physical activity, hands-on learning, acting out, role playing. Tools include equipment and real objects.” (same source)
  • Evidence: I don’t think this one really needs to be explained, because Keith is just deftly skilled when it comes to movement. He’s very fluid, moves quickly, is light enough on his feet to dodge enemies and sidestep disaster. The way he flies Red Lion with focus on speed and agility is a direct parallel to this. And I think that, just focusing on Keith’s own ability, the way he navigates the debris field when his suit is damaged is an excellent illustration of this
  • Intrapersonal: Understanding one’s own interests, goals. These learners tend to shy away from others. They’re in tune with their inner feelings; they have wisdom, intuition and motivation, as well as a strong will, confidence and opinions. They can be taught through independent study and introspection. Tools include books, creative materials, diaries, privacy and time. They are the most independent of the learners.” (same source)
  • Evidence: Keith is often very independent and in tune with his own feelings. And we know from his whole personal quest to uncover more about his identity that he’s very much an introspective person. Intuition is also a huge part of who Keith is, and we see this manifest as a kind of quintessence sensitivity–how he was able to sense Blue in the desert, how he was the only one able to connect with his Lion over a long distance, knowing he had to target Haggar’s ship during the whole thing with Naxzela, ect. 
  • Naturalistic: Seems to encompass environmental awareness. Knowing the lay of the land, practical outdoor skills and intelligence, a deeper understanding of the natural world, a more nurturing personality, ect. 
  • Evidence: Keith living on his own in the desert for a year and later saying that he likes the outdoors because it’s quiet. Seems to be more in tune with the natural world and has more than enough of a grasp of outdoor knowledge to live off the land if need be. Also, does exhibit nurturing instincts–a fierce desire to protect and provide for others 

So yes, Keith is very smart and in a number of ways. And I will 100% always defend that 

Guys, i can’t. like. im crying. this is so real right now. jodie whittaker is the face of doctor who, but it’s even bigger than that, it’s about everything else that surrounds doctor who as a british institution and a worldwide phenomenon. board games, posters, trade cards, and action figures and comics, books, cosplay, the social influence and reputation it carries, it’s all accessible to woman in a new and intimate way. everything just changed for us. and yes, everything has changed for little boys and men too. boys will grow up seeing the doctor as a woman, seeing women as equals. men will learn to relate to to her in ways that women have been taught to relate to men. and little girls will grow up without one more limitation, they will grow up not knowing that they can’t be the hero. it’s going to cause a revolution.

6

i’m still falling for you.

hello there!! have you been doing well, angel? if not, this is a gentle but firm reminder to get your shit together. but hey, why shouldn’t you be proud of yourself? you have conquered so many years of your life and - no don’t you dare try to be modest, every single tiny achievement matters. + I’m here to tell you that failing is NORMAL. everyone fails at one thing or another but succeed at another. And if you feel that you aren’t successful at anything, then darling you haven’t tried hard enough.
alright alright, before I begin ranting out of the topic, let’s get started.

note: this is a part of the get your shit together masterposts. To view the other articles in this category and to view the topics in this that I’ll be covering in future, go here.


avoiding negative feelings

the biggest reason why I don’t have that many negative thoughts (note that I said “many” and not all. I too have bad days once  in a while) now because I realized that I, and only I, am completely on my side. I’m there for me at all times, throughout my life. And doesn’t it sound stupid to be against the only player on my team?

once i realized that, it become so much easier to work at par with myself and to love myself. I became more patient with myself, started embracing my flaws and loving the person that I was. sounds pretty cringy? that’s only because we don’t talk about these things and we feel they aren’t worth talking about. However if you really want to conquer life, loving yourself is the most important layer in this many layered cheesecake and yes, i like food.

cheat code: so how do avoid negative feelings? the answer lies in realizing your worth and capabilities and being on the same team as your own self.


dealing with negative feelings

now we come to the part when you are having negative feelings. Everyone has bad days and negative feelings but you can deal with ‘em in a better way than feeling low and wasting your entire day. and here’s way number one -

figure out what triggered you. when I have a bad day I sit down and list down what exactly provocated the bad day. these were my reasons -

  • someone said I was being annoying
  • I didn’t get much done that day
  • I felt gross and untidy

then, find solutions to those problems.

  • hey, everyone don’t have to like you. you are proud of yourself and that’s enough.
  • Make a list. Do those things. I don’t care if you’re tired, do those things. If you don’t do them, you’ll feel guilty and that’s never fun.
  • god, just go take a shower again. (taylor, you stink.)

as you see, the problems were really petty and solutions are pretty simple. but remember that these problems aren’t negligible. this method works bc once you figure out solutions to them, you figure out a method how to fight them so that the same problems to affect you again. Now I know that when I feel gross I need to take a shower and not roam around like a stinky animal. See what I mean?

lastly, realize that these things are not worth you losing control of yourself and walking around like a dead zombie #rip.

sometimes I have negative feelings because I feel under confident or not sure about something. when this happens, which leads me to way number two - I have a convo with myself.

ok mate, why do you feel down? um I don’t feel sure about this presentation. what if I screw this up? what if the teacher is like this is so shit?? what if I never get to eat donuts again???

seriously? well, I can assure you that donuts aren’t going extinct. as for this interview, listen child. you have prepared for this shit, you can do it. doN’T freak out and don’t think you can’t ace this. you can, trust me.

talking to myself not only helps calm me down but also gives me a sense of purpose. That I have promised myself to ace this and I cannot let myself down. 


loving yourself

  • understanding why

why should you love yourself?

bc you yourself crave the feeling to be loved. isn’t being in love simply magical? Well, so is being in love with yourself. it is even more magical tbh. this is bc you are with yourself 24/7 and when you start loving yourself you become much more aware of yourself and you have able to work much better since you are able to identify your flaws and strengths. Remember when you used to bitch about that girl on whom every guy had a crush and you none? (same fam #LongLiveTheHobos) Turns out that someone does have a huge crush on you. Love yourself, your brain craves for you.

  • take yourself out on dates

raise your hand if you think dates are great. I agree. They are even better when you go out to a restaurant bc like food is great. it is super important that you take your own self out of dates and not only bc you are hungry but bc a conqueror (yAS THOSE ARE MY PEOPLE) knows the value of taking time off for himself. These are not simply slogging through the weekend and binge watching Netflix, mind you. That’s a huge waste of time, froind. A conqueror makes a date official. cheat code: remember that your dates have to be memorable and most importantly, well earned. Here’s a checklist to make your dates more special.

  • positive energy, check.
  • more smiles and hugs, check.
  • a happy mindset, check.
  • and how about a list of things that you can do for yourself?

the turn a bad day around challenge

here’s the first challenge of the get your shit together series! I introduced this bc readers said that the topics on here were easy to say but harder to carry out.I do agree with that but hey, I never said that getting your shit together would be easy. by completing the challenges you can implement the ideas I’m trying to propagate here and also get a feel of having that particular area under your control.

  • task one: when you are having a bad day, sit down. list down the reasons why it was a bad day and why are you feel down. it can be as simple as not getting enough sleep and feeling grumpy.
  • task two: list down the solutions that you can use to overcome those problems.
  • task three: remind yourself that these petty problems cannot cost you your valuable time and that you are a badass bitch and you can handle everything.
  • task four: make a to-do list. I know you haven’t done no shit today so now is the time to shine. don’t put like a thousand things on the list tho lmao. three - four would do enough for the moment.
  • task five: do those things. seriously, do them.
  • task six: (and this is the nicest one) treat yo'self!! you have literally turned around a bad day and done so much shit! you have successfully conquered this day, a day which would have been spent lamenting and getting nothing done. maybe go treat yourself to some delicious pumpkin pie from a bakery (share with me pls); you really do deserve it!! I’m so proud of you :^)

and that’s it, it’s a wrap! if you have any questions/suggestions regarding anything I said up there (or maybe you just wanna talk about food), feel free to send in a message! my other masterposts are here and to request a masterpost, leave your question in my ask box!

I hope you all are well, stay safe and conquer life, you amaze conqueror :“)

“Thymsexual: Someone who is sexual attraction varies based on emotional state.”

“Aliquasexual: Someone who only feels sexual attraction under certain circumstances.”

“Gray/Greysexual: Someone who only feels sexual attraction sometimes, typically at a small level. “

Do people think that most people feel sexual attraction all the fucking time?? Do you honestly think people normally feel sexual after their dog died or when they are upset for any other reason? Do you think we just normally walk down the street and think about sex none stop??? what are you measuring sexual attraction with? what is the common or normal amount of sexual attraction?

This is ridiculous.

Lance's Love Interest

Okay guys. I could write a dissertation on why I think Keith will be Lance’s love interest, but that’s pretty much already been done. So what I do want to talk about is why Lance’s love interest won’t be Allura.


Before I get into this, I feel obligated to say that I’m a big ol’ bi sexual. Meaning that I’m not against this ship because ew girls. I’m not against it at all. Sure, I don’t ship it, but personal feelings about a pairing have no basis in cannon analysis.

Lets start with Lance’s vlog

What I got from the vlog is that nobody lies to Lance like Lance lies to Lance. Like seriously, how Lance can breathe beyond those Layers of Bravado is beyond me. He spends the majority of the vlog talking about how Allura probably does like him because he’s such a lady killer and yada yada yada, bull shit, bull shit, bull shit. You get the picture.


But then there’s this moment.


It’s legitimately sweet. Lance is gushing not about how he’s going to win over Allura or how awesome he is but about why he likes her so much. Only then he catches himself and goes right back into his Wow I’m So Awesome mode.

Then directly after this, he starts talking about how he’s not ready to settle down, which is… strange. Yeah, you could argue that Lance is saying this because he’s young, but the way it’s presented makes it seem like he’s covering something up, especially when you take into consideration Lance’s How to Fall in Love guide.

Lance loves love, not just as an end goal, but as an continuous endeavor. He understands it’s hard work, but he wants to put in that work. Lance wants to be in love.

What I’m getting at here is, Lance really likes Allura, but I think deep down he knows she doesn’t return those feelings. I mean, hes all like, ’Pff, yeah, of course Allura thinks I’m awesome, but sorry babe, can’t hold this stud down’ directly after we see him swooning over her, and honestly, how more obvious can it be that he’s hiding his real feelings/over compensating?

Lance knows Allura probably wont ever return his feeling and us as the audience knows that too. Or at least we should. Seriously, if I could say there was one thing I really have against this pairing, it would be the fact that Lance continues to flirt with Allura despite her obvious discomfort with it. The only reactions to his flirting we’ve ever gotten from Allura are disinterest and down right disgust. Meaning, his feelings are not returned.

Oh, but you might say, well they could be one day, and that’s where I’m going to have to disagree with you. I really don’t think Allura would just suddenly start to have feelings for Lance, not when there hasn’t been an ounce of romantic subtext between them and especially not when taking into consideration some of the comments made by the creators and voice actors.

Jeremy Shada said that Lance still thinks he has a chance with Allura, heavily implying that he doesn’t. The creators said that Lance would end up with someone he needed, not wanted.

Even if you ignore the blatant fact that Lance has wanted Allura from the beginning, it still makes this scene and Lance’s choice of words really interesting.

Lance straight up said that “Sometimes we don’t get what we want” while talking to Blue. And who is Blues new Paladin? That’s right! Allura! She even walked in right after he said it.

I know this has already been said, but just for the hell of it, let me point out that they also said Lance would end up with someone self assured, something Allura is not. She doubts herself more than any other character and has from day one. In fact, it’s Lance - one of the most insecure characters in the show - who gave her the confidence she needed in the season 4 final.

Now I really want to talk about this scene. I’ve heard people say that it parallels the ‘We are a good team’ moment from season one, and like, totally. It does, but apart of what this scene accomplished - at least to me - was solidifying the fact that Allura does not have feelings for Lance.


Lets break it down: There’s the obvious differences between these scenes. Keith and Lance’s has soft background music, unnecessarily long eye contact, fond smiles, a purple background (the combination of their respective colors), and a total mood shift. Its filled with romantic subtext and is also brought up later on several occasions. Lance and Allura’s moment had none of that.

Something less obvious Id like to point out is that if these scenes do parallel each other, then Lance would be the Keith in this situation and Allura the Lance. You may not agree with me, but I’m pretty positive that Keith has been low key pining for Lance since season one, which is fitting, because Lance has been pining for Allura. In Keith and Lance’s scene, Lance is drawn in by Keith whereas Allura merely glances back at Lance and then brushes him off. Insinuating that while Lance and Keith’s scene is a big moment to both of them and could be the start of feelings that Lance may go onto reciprocate, the same can not be said for Allura and Lance’s scene. In summary, Allura - being the Lance in this situation - did not show the same interest that Lance showed to Keith in their scene.

You could say that the situation was dire, and yeah, you’d be right, but for one, they don’t show us parallels for nothing. They’re used as a means to compare and contrast. Two, Keith straight up almost got his ass handed to him in the midst of a battle all because he was too busy making doki doki eyes at Lance. Meaning circumstance isn’t really an issue when dealing with this sort of thing.

The last thing I want to point out is, while Allura never reciprocates Lance’s advances, Lance - in his own self deluded, deny the bi, sort of way - does reciprocate Keith’s. First off, it should be heavily noted that Keith’s interest in Lance is much more subtle than Lance’s interest in Allura, because as we all know, Keith has abandonment issues, walls, and all that fun stuff. He doesn’t parade around his interest because he probably doesn’t see it ever being returned, not realistically.

But he’s wrong and here’s why: Lance feels inferior to the entire team, so the idea that he goes around challenging Keith and constantly vying for his attention out of pure jealousy/a need to prove himself makes no sense. If that were the case, he would behave that way towards everyone. Granted, Lance did think that Keith thought he was better than Lance, but in season two, Lance said, “I guess no one else thinks that” in regards to his marksmanship. Meaning Lance thinks that the rest of the team thinks hes not as talented as them also, and yet he treats them the same way he always has. Lance is literally obsessed with Keith, especially in season one. He’s the embodiment of the boy pulling on the girls pigtail to get her attention.

He also talked about Keith in admiration when he wasn’t around, wearing a similar face to that of the one he wears when hes flirting. Hell, he wears that same expression every time he teases Keith, but when he does it here, paired with this praise, we know it’s meant to be interpreted as a fond expression.

(also note that his expression morphs to this when he starts talking about Keith and only Keith despite the fact he’s praising the entire team)

He admires Keith. He wants Keith’s attention and respect. He flirtatiously banters with him. He goes to Keith when making important decisions about his future and place on the team. He expresses ambiguous jealousy every time Keith is with a girl.

Allura does none of this. So if you want to say that she could possibly reciprocate Lance’s feelings then you have to say the same for Lance towards Keith.

Look, my purpose here isn’t to dissuade anyone from shipping Allura and Lance or to down said shippers. I’m just trying to analyze cannon material and reach an conclusion. So my final theory on the matter of Lance’s love interest is that Lance has feelings for both Keith and Allura. He just doesn’t get that he has feelings towards Keith for the same reason he doesn’t want to admit he knows Allura doesn’t like him romantically. He likes to keep a lot of things tucked away in his head and chooses ignorance over introspection until those thoughts some how make it to the forefront and he’s forced to do otherwise. I think in season 5 the vlog will come into play and we’ll see the summation of Lance’s feelings towards Allura, but I have little to no doubt that it will not go the way he hopes it will.

And hey, if I’m wrong, I’m wrong. More power to you Allura and Lance shippers.

‘Let the past die. Kill it, if you have to. That’s the only way to become what you were meant to be.’ - (This does not mean what you think it does....)

I haven’t written many original posts recently, but given what has happened today, expect quite a few over the next couple of days.

My first post is about the quote above. I wanted to just let my feelings settle a bit before writing this, but it just happens to be the first thing I noticed.

For those unfamiliar, I wrote a post a couple months ago about Kylo Ren and his motivations. It pretty much sums up what Lucasfilm presented to us in this trailer, as far as where Kylo Ren is, psychologically speaking, at the end of The Force Awakens. I would REALLY recommend reading it in order to understand where I am coming from concerning this post.

http://sakurau121.tumblr.com/post/157962305035/you-know-what-the-really-ironic-thing-is-with-kylo

As many of us suspected, the central theme of ‘The Last Jedi’ seems to be indeed that of finding one’s sense of identity

With the above quote I found myself viewing it in a very different light after watching the trailer a few times.

It’s partially to do with the tone of Kylo’s voice. He’s not angry, not even sad exactly. He almost sounds like he is advising someone. And the language also suggests that, when he talks about ‘what YOU were meant to be’, to me this alludes to the fact that he is either being metaphorical or speaking directly to somebody else.

This is purely my own speculation, but in my mind, he is actually speaking to Rey. This line might have been put in simply for the trailer and doesn’t actually exist in the film, but I think it’s part of a conversation. A conversation while Rey and Kylo are connected through the force? A conversation after Kylo reveals Rey’s past, including what happened to her family? Maybe. These are all possibilities.

But why would I jump to this conclusion? After all, isn’t he simply talking about killing his mother and uncle, after having killed his father?

Originally posted by chatnoirs-baton

Actually, I say no.

And it’s for a very simple, logical reason that has nothing to do with sentimentality (although I, like many of you out there I suspect, did indeed tear up when Kylo’s thumb hovered over that button which, if pushed, would end up killing his mother).

It comes from comparing TFA with this trailer. You have to take into account of what has happened in TFA and how that has changed everyone. I don’t actually think Kylo is repeating himself here, that I believe is misdirect but again I might just be overthinking.

Kylo Ren says in the official trailer for TFA that ‘he will finish what Darth Vader started’.

Originally posted by star-wars-is-life

Throughout Episode VII, Kylo Ren is constantly emulating his grandfather, most likely because he wants to be like him. He cherishes Darth Vader’s crumpled mask like an old relic in a museum and wears his own mask proudly at the beginning of the film.

Now let’s compare that to this trailer. What does he do when he says -

‘Let the past die. Kill it, if you have to. That’s the only way to become what you were meant to be.’ 

What does he do?

Originally posted by boomdafunk

He destroys his mask.

In other words, he destroys his old self. The old self that emulated Darth Vader, that was trying to be like the grandfather and hid behind a mask.

This is incredibly literal as this is what the trailer actually wants you to see. The first interpretation one could logically form. And you see how Kylo Ren is doing a complete u-turn here. He is literally doing the opposite to what he did in the TFA trailer. You miss it perhaps because of the impact of what happens soon after this shot. But this point can be expanded upon, as I did in my previous post above.

Kylo Ren, Ben Solo, whoever he is, is trying to find his sense of identity. But he is no longer satisfied with trying to find it by looking into the past, by looking into his family’s history. This INCLUDES Darth Vader, not just Luke, Leia or Han.

I think he is in fact turning his back on his own lineage. Because he thought it would be enough. He thought that by finding out his grandfather was the powerful Sith Lord Darth Vader, he would be able to answer the question of why he could never find balance within himself.

Instead?

He’s even more lost now than he was before. He knows that the answer no longer lies with Darth Vader.

So how does this connect to his dialogue?

Because this mirrors another character’s trajectory. And I believe he says these words to the said character later in the film, when he realizes his past mistake.

Originally posted by starwarsfilms

Rey.

Why? Because she is still struggling, just as he is, with finding ‘her place in all this’. In other words, finding her sense of identity.

What I think is truly amazing is that somebody else in this sequel trilogy has already said these words before, or at least something to this effect.

Originally posted by bruceewayne

‘The belonging you seek is not behind you, it is ahead.’

Phrased completely differently but when you put that next to -

‘Let the past die. That’s the only way to become what you were meant to be.’

Yes, I know I cut a piece of dialogue out but it’s clear what is happening here, and in fact what is happening throughout this trailer.

Kylo and Rey’s paths are not just similar.

They are one and the same.

This is why people have come away from this trailer questioning whom Snoke is referring to. Because in a way it doesn’t matter. The point Lucasfilm is making here is that ‘Rey and Kylo are two halves-’

And you can finish off the rest of that sentence.

Now back to what I said at the beginning of this post. I think we will find out more of Rey’s past, but my daydreaming self is saying that Kylo warns Rey, just as Maz did, to not let her past completely inform her future. Otherwise, she could end up like him, misguided and lost. When he says ‘kill it if you have to’, this could be on a figurative level or it may allude to Rey’s dark origins (stay turned for that post).

If what he’s saying is basically the same as what Maz recommends to Rey, then what does that say about Kylo? What does that say about the light and dark, if they are essentially saying the same thing? :-)

So what do you guys think? Let me know through comments and reblog and check out for more posts in the coming days. This is such an exciting time to be part of this fandom and I love you all very much! You make the experience a hundred times more moving and fun! I nearly screamed at the end of that trailer and for a minute thought I was genuinely hallucinating. Gobsmacked, speechless, is best way I can describe it.

HOW I WANT CHANBAEK TO BE:

Originally posted by sugaboo93

HOW CHANBAEK ACTUALLY IS:

Originally posted by sefuns

2

@jaydickweek:  Talons/Court of Owls // Father Todd 

I know canon gives us formal and somber priest!Jason, but imagine snarky youth group minister Jason (a.k.a. my fave). No connection to Bruce or the afterlife, still the same snarky little shit he was as Robin. He’s a bit gruff because it wasn’t the joker that made him terrible at showing weakness, but he’s protective as hell. The kids fucking love him.

Well. 

Most kids. Most kids love him. 

And then there’s Damian. 

Little feral assassin Damian, fresh out of a disastrous first meeting with Daddy Bats, and he most definitely doesn’t love Jason. But Jason knows an abused kid who needs a way out when he sees one, even if that situation is way out of Jason’s league. 

Jason has just started making real progress when Talon shows up. Luckily, and to his very great surprise, Jason’s got Damian to protect him. Of course, then Damian gets attached. 

Fast forward, Damian rehabs Talon!Dick by taking the don’t-be-a-murderous-asshole lessons he learned from Jason 30 seconds prior and teaching them inexpertly to Talon. He gets confused and territorial when Youth Minister Jason and Talon start building their own connection, which may eventually go in a slightly unexpected direction.

a.k.a. makin’ out. ♥

‘Doubling Down’ Rant.

I feel like one of the most prominent aspects of this episode was the portrayal of the characters’ psychology, the writing and the dialogue did a great job depicting how people get into toxic relationships in the first place, and why it is difficult for them to get away once they’re in.

Kyle for instance, is portrayed as a caring and moral-ridden individual, that although rational, lets his emotions and sense of justice get involved in his course of action. He desired to intervene because he considered it to be the right thing to do, never once questioning his personal interest for Heidi until the girls pointed it out. While all the other kids aknowledge Cartman’s demeanor towards Heidi, none of them are willing to get themselves involved in it, whereas Kyle has always been the one to confront Cartman’s wrong doings and pursuit him, positioning himself as ‘good’ and Cartman as ‘evil’, dynamic that has ultimately served to feed both Cartman’s enthusiasm to torture him, and Kyle’s sense of selfrighteousness and tendency to see himself as a martyr, trait that he shares with Cartman, but as he stated, 'We all wrongly see ourselves as the victim sometimes, but Cartman sees himself as the victim ALL the time’, the main difference being that Kyle is able to aknowledge his mistakes and learn from them, unlike Cartman.

To get some insight into Kyle’s remark: 'In a way, I feel like we’re all going out with Cartman right now’ reflecting on how all of them are, at some degree, and specially Kyle, always been involved in a toxic relationship with Cartman’s mind games. Kyle has been, for a long time now, Cartman’s main sympathizer, he can’t help but look out for his personal improvement, and often attempted to get him to do the right thing and gain counsciousness on his own warped mentality, desire that Cartman would not hesitate to take advantage of, tricking Kyle into commiting to a cause if he could profit from his support.

In this episode, Kyle appears to have come to the conclussion that Cartman is beyond help, and that neither he nor Heidi can do anything to change that, for the best thing they can do for him is not to feed his sociopathic needs, furthermore demonstrated by their encounter on the hallway, with Kyle continuously trying to reason with him and assure him it was all for his own good, Cartman making deaf ears to his claims, finally leaving Kyle no choice but to knock him out in self defense, who apologizes regretful.

Cartman, on the other side, is miserable with Heidi, but also without her. As I stated on my last post concerning their relationship:

'He can’t bring himself to end the relationship and thus giving Heidi freedom of choice, she’s a property and so Cartman can’t stand the idea of his belongings moving on to other people. Cartman thinks of Heidi as a tool that exists with the only purpose of being at his disposition to offer him constant attention and validation, nothing more, nothing less.

Simultaneously, Cartman can’t stand Heidi, because she doesn’t fit the description of Cartman’s ideal image of her. Naturally, Heidi isn’t the tool Cartman expects her to be, she is an human being with her own individual needs. Whereas Cartman looks for a relationship where he is the center of attention, never giving anything in return, and a partner willing to follow him blindly against all the odds, without him having to worry about losing their support; Heidi looks for a functional, healthy romantic relationship, were all the parties involved contribute their part. Cartman is unwilling to fulfill this role, because doing so would position him as an equal of Heidi’s, which means, to him, degrade him from his high-entity status.’

Nearing the end we realize Cartman has found a way of manipulating Heidi into believing she’s in the relationship she craved for, and thus avoiding any sign of resistance from her. He has learned that if he wants to manipulate Heidi successfully, he needs to put a little effort on the relationship every now and then, offering her reassurance. This way, Cartman can act selfishly while at the same time 'rewarding’ Heidi for her subservience, throwing away any doubt she might had in him. He fools her into believing his wrongdoings are common human flaws that need to exist in order to keep improving himself.

Heidi is portrayed as someone who desires to aid the needy, she cannot bring herself to refuse someone’s cries for help, which is, besides the ironic effects of peer pressure, the main reason she continues to be stuck with Cartman and allows herself to be manipulated by him. He sees in Cartman someone who takes bad decisions, but is fundamentally kindhearted. Someone who is in need for her guidance. Even when ditching Kyle after being indoctrinated by Cartman, her kind nature is a definitive trait of her character. Cartman was persuasive enough to convince her of his beliefs, he made sure until the last moment that his ideas appeared to be reasonably fundamented. He told her what she wanted to hear when she was feeling the most guilty, deflecting the blame for the failure of their relationship unto Kyle instead, but reassuring her image of Kyle by telling her he hadn’t been counscious of his actions. He convinced her of attributing her own supposed flaws ('being moody’) to her ethnic background, and this way implying she has no control over ever improving herself, comforting her but making her feel helpess over her situation at the same time, this serves to Cartman as a mechanism to increase her emotional dependence to him, by making her feel he’s the only one who will ever love her despite her imperfections.

Regarding Cartman’s idea of Kyle, I feel like Cartman projects all of his own corruption unto Kyle. He subcounsciously thinks of Kyle as his equal, although he cannot recognize the corruption from within. Kyle’s intentions are never pure in Cartman’s mind, he must always be plotting something against him the same way he himself does to him. To him, Kyle’s purpose in life is to get in Cartman’s way. As the series progressed, we’ve seen Cartman gradually watering down his hostility towards Kyle in latter seasons the more time they spent together, and instead replacing it with an odd sense of familiarity and trust, until this point, Cartman’s friendly demeanor towards Kyle that even manifested itself at one point earlier in the episode, takes a sudden turn the moment Cartman finds out he might have been responsible for his breakup with Heidi. Following this event, we see Cartman’s hatred towards Kyle reach its peak when he goes batshit after his trippy jewish dream sequence, spewing all his resentments against Kyle in spite of the latter’s attempts to excuse himself, Cartman feeling betrayed after letting himself 'fall into Kyle’s claws’ by allowing him the benefit of the doubt previously.

Having stated all this, I think Cartman has taken care of the problems he had with Heidi, and now that the challenge is over, the last scene leads me to believe he has shifted his interest from the pleasure he obtains from having domain over her, to the impact his behaviour towards her has on Kyle instead. He’s using his influence on the people around Kyle to make them into proxys as a mean to inflict pain onto him. Heidi is no longer the tool, his entire relationship with her is now a tool on itself.


It was also interesting to see the conection between B plot and A plot relying on the parallel of the toxic relationship between Cartman, Kyle and Heidi, and that of politicians with their supporters, instead of having each storyline intersecting with the other, though I don’t have a strong stand on the matter, since I’m for the most part ignorant concerning the USA political status.

The weakest point of the episode in my opinion was the introduction of elements that seemingly served no purpose in the narrative, and ultimately aimed for a specific purpose in order to lead the plot in a certain direction. For example, Cartman’s dialogue when making fun of Heidi for gaining weight after tricking her into introducing meat into her vegan diet, indicated he had a goal in mind by doing this, though we never get any insight on what this particular goal may be other than to reassure his dominance over her. Besides this being a dangerous move for Cartman to make just after getting Heidi’s trust back, it seemed like it didn’t serve any purpose other than to incite Kyle into intervening in the relationship. Another example would be Cartman visiting Token’s house, there wasn’t really a point for Cartman to do this besides giving him the chance to make racial remarks some more. Finding out about Kyle being responsible for his breakup with Heidi through Token’s dad seemed too coincidental, though I don’t really mind, even less after being presented with Cartman’s fantastic Kyle delirium sequence.

I really enjoyed the execution of the humor, there were some great jokes, the animation team did an amazing job and overall I think this was a fantastic episode with a rather dark thematic.

Miscommunication // Billy Hargrove x Reader

A/N: I actually like how this one turned out and I hope you like it too anon. Remember that feedback is greatly appreciated

Warnings: OOC!Billy, mentions of alcohol, and hinted (but not directly stated) at sexual activities

・☆ ✯  ゚  ゚・☆ ✯・☆ ✯  ゚ ゚・☆ ✯・☆ ✯  ゚ ゚・☆ ✯

3rd person POV

You were late. Well you and your boyfriend, Billy Hargrove, were late and it was his fault. You see you slept over at his house since you ended up getting too drunk at last nights party so you ended up staying the night at Billy’s house. He had other plans for what to do when you guys got to his house but once you stepped foot inside you passed out. He was bummed out that you both couldn’t do what he had in mind but what mattered most to him was if you were alright or not. So to him that meant making sure that you had enough sleep. Which resulted in you both sleeping in and waking up around the time 2nd period would start at first you were mad but you knew he had good intentions so you let it slide. But the people who wouldn’t slide were your friends. To be exact Steve Harrington and Nancy Wheeler. They were both teasing you asking questions like “why are you late?” And “What were you two doing so late at night which required you to stay over at Billy’s house?” You told them what happened but they still think that something else happened.

As the day progressed you started noticing that people were staring at you. This was a normal occurrence since you started dating Billy but, they normally looked at you with jealousy and envy for either becoming so close with him or by the fact that you are dating him, but now they were looking at you with pity. You swore you even heard someone tell someone else, “Do you think she knows?” And “probably not since they are still together.” That confused you ‘were they talking about you? Or were they talking about someone else?’ Either way you felt something was off and now you were going to find out what it was one way or another.

During your art class you noticed that the people at your table kept giving you that same look of pity and now you were sick of it. You were not going to be treated like some kicked puppy.

(Y/n)’s POV

“So is anyone going to tell me why everyone is looking at me like I am some sort of kicked puppy?” I said sounding annoyed. “Well it’s about Billy…” one boy said looking at everything but me. “What about him?” I asked him starting to get angry. “I-i-its just tha-“ he was cut off because someone slammed the door open. “Stacy you need to start coming to class on time! I let you off the hook this week because you are new but I’m sick of you showing up to my class late. Come late again and I’ll give you a detention.” The art teacher said with a huff. I looked at this “Stacy” and I recognized her from earlier this week. Her and Billy were talking. Well it was mainly like her flirting with him and him not being interested in her. After she found out that Billy and I were dating I’ve been put on her shit list not that I really cared or anything since I don’t even know the girl. “(Y/n)…” the boy said trying to get my attention. “Oh sorry… what were you saying?” I asked feeling like shit for not paying attention. “I said that she’s the reason why everyone’s been looking at you like that.” He said still looking away from me. “How does this have anything to do with Billy…?” I asked starting to get angry again but my confusion was still overpowering that anger. “Well at lunch someone found them making out behind the gym… and apparently they both looked like they were having a pretty good time with each other.” He said finally looking at my face but still giving me that look of pity.

I didn’t say anything. I couldn’t. If I did I knew I was going to cry. “Excuse me can I go to the nurses office? I’m not feeling too well” I said with a shaky voice but still loud enough so that the teacher could hear me. “Sure (Y/n) there’s a project that’s going to be due next week we’ll talk about it more tomorrow so you can catch up” he said looking at me concerned. “Thank you” I said in a really quiet voice before I stormed out of the classroom.

Time skip to after school

“Jonathan!” I called out to him looking like a mess. Face red and blotchy from all the crying I did waiting for school to be over. He turned around really fast. I probably scared him. “What’s up (Y/n)? You doing alright? You look like you’ve been through a lot” he said looking concerned. “I’m fine but I was wondering if you could give me a ride home” I asked him ready to cry again. “Uh.. yeah. Sure. But doesn’t Billy drive you?” He asked looking confused. ‘He doesn’t know?’ “Yeah he does but I don’t want to see him right now…” I said letting a couple tears slip out. “Oh shit I didn’t mean to make you cry.” He said looking panicked. “It’s fine but can we go now? I don’t want to run into him” I said quietly. “Okay.. let’s go now then.” He said trying his best not to look worried about this whole situation. As we were pulling out of the schools parking lot Billy was waiting by his car and was looking around. Stacy walked up to him and threw herself at him and he wrapped his arms around her and laughed. At that moment Billy and I made eye contact. My eyes began to water and his eyes widened as he pushed Stacy away and got in his car.

I guess Jonathan saw too because I heard him mumble out ‘asshole’ I just looked down and quietly began to sob.

Time skip a couple of days

I haven’t been at school. I haven’t been doing a lot actually. I haven’t slept, I haven’t eaten anything, hell.. All I’ve been doing was crying, even after Jonathan brought me home all I’ve been doing was just turn myself into a sobbing mess. He hasn’t even called me, or stopped by to check on me, or at least to apologize and explain what was going on. Only my friends have visited but I haven’t gone out of my room to see them. I didn’t even ask who it was because, what’s the point!? I’m not even sad anymore I’m just done. Done with this whole situation. Done with dealing with him.

There’s a knock on my door. “(Y/n) there’s someone here to see you.” I sighed “who is it?” I asked my throat raw from the lack of care I’ve been giving my body and all of the crying I have done. “It’s the same boy who’s been visiting you everyday sweetie.” ‘Boy?…Everyday?… who is it?’ I stepped out of my room and walked down the stairs to see who it was and it was Billy. He looked awful. His eyes tired and red from what seemed to look like he wasn’t getting enough sleep and that he has been…crying?

Scratch that part when I said I was done dealing with him and that I’m over it I’m not and I’m not ready to face him. My mom looked at both me and Billy since it seemed that we were caught in some sort of stare off. She felt the tension in the air and decided to leave. “Well I have to run to the store to pick up so if you wouldn’t mind watching over (Y/n) while I’m gone that would be very helpful.” After she said that she left. No words passed for a couple seconds I took a step back and it seemed like he knew what I was about to do next since he started to walk towards me. As I saw him nearing the stairs I turned around and ran to my room locking the door behind me and went to my bed feeling my eyes sting with the tears starting to build up again. He knocked on my door “(Y/n)… open the door” he said his voice quiet and shaky. I said nothing I only started to cry. He put his forehead against the door and it sounded like he began to cry. “Please… open the door I need to talk to you.” He sounded broken… the carefree boy from California that I once knew was gone and replaced with a broken and vulnerable boy. I was going to say something but all that came out were sobs. “I’ll just tell you through the door then..” he took a shaky breath. “Harrington told me what people have been telling you about Stacy and I and… all I have to say that it wasn’t true…” I started to get angry. “What do you mean?” I stood up and walked closer to the door but still not close enough to unlock it. “Stacy is my cousin and on that day I wasn’t making out with her behind the gym… she told me that she was pregnant and decided to move back to California…So I congratulated her and gave her a hug you know. But I guess some people mistook that whole entire situation and spread that rumor about her and I.” I took a step closer “well what about the first day that she came here?… she was flirting with you.” My voice cracked, “kept asking if you had a girlfriend when you kept telling her that I was your girlfriend. I’ve been put on her shit list because of that you know.” I took another step closer, heart pounding against my chest feeling as if it was going to burst. “She just wanted to mess with me… she always used to rub it in that she was dating someone when I wasn’t. So this time I actually was dating someone and she got mad, first skeptical, but mainly mad since she wouldn’t be able to tease me anymore.” My hand was on the knob at this point door already unlocked. “Why are you just telling me this now?” I asked, ready to open the door. “I’ve been coming by everyday… everyday I came by and your mother would just tell me that you didn’t want to see anyone…” My eyes widened, ‘Shit that was him!? Why didn’t my mom tell me!?’ “I thought I was going to go crazy if I didn’t see you again.” His voice was still just as shaky as before. “Are you telling the truth?” My hand gripped the knob tighter, voice shaking. “Yes I am.” He gave out a shaky breath. Still crying. “You could even ask Max… even my parents and they’d agree and say that I’m telling the truth” he let out another shaky breath sounding like he’s ready to sob. I opened the door.

Both of us had tears streaming down our faces. I threw myself at him. And he caught me squeezing me tightly and still crying. I looked up at him and kissed him. He kissed back with so much passion and force that I know for a fact that my lips are going to be bruised but who cares. All I cared about was letting Billy know how sorry I was for doubting him. When we pulled away my head started spinning. Not because of the kiss but because of the lack of care I’ve been giving my body. Everything just started to hit me at once just like how I would have hit the floor if it weren’t for him holding me tightly against him. As if he’d let go I would have disappeared.

Time skip to later that night

I woke up. Head hurting and eyes burning from all the tears that were shed earlier. As I tried to get up I felt something pull me back and I crashed into something hard but warm. I turned around and saw that Billy pulled me into his chest. “Stay” he mumbled. I giggled and kissed his nose before attempting to snuggle into him. He pulled me back up to him and kissed me. “You missed.” He said as he pulled away. I laughed and snuggled into him trying to get comfortable. “By the way your mom said she’d be him tomorrow. Went out for date night.” He said the need for sleep evident in his voice. “Let’s just sleep. We both need it” I said pulling the blankets up around me. He wrapped his arms around me tighter and kissed my head before I fell asleep.