one time for ya mind

love yourself, cause nobody else is gonna do it for you

I fell in sujood 
With nothing but the storm in my mind
And the tsunami in my eyes
But when I uttered Your name
And called upon Your strength
You gave me sabr,
You gave me tawakkul
In everything that has come,
Is happening
And will occur.
You gave me imaan 
Until I could get back up again
And find You in my niyyah.

tfw u try and take selfies cause u feel Validated and Cute and then u look at urself and all u can think is ‘who the fuck does this gremlin think he is??’

Oh god, I just thought of a new (maybe) parallel and I’m regretting it immediately.

I was re-watching a Caryl scene in S2 when Daryl went off on Carol after they found Sophia in the barn. It’s always so painful to watch that scene nowadays b/c I’m so used to Daryl being so sweet to her, that it makes me want to cry with all the things he said to her. Yes of course they were both hurting, both had been abused in their life, and he was just trying to push her away, but it doesn’t excuse the things he said to her. I really do hope the things he said went in one ear and out the other, but I wouldn’t be surprised if Carol remembered at least a little bit of what he said.

Especially one line in particular: “If ya spent half your time minding your daughter’s business instead of sticking your nose into everybody else’s business she might still be alive.”

What if that stayed with her all this time, the guilt of if she watched her daughter just a little closer she might still be alive today?

Fast forwarding to the present, and she’s now having to deal with what happened with Lizzie and Mika. What if she thought the same way. ‘If she had watched Lizzie more closely, she and her sister might still be alive today’. I honestly wouldn’t be surprised if Carol connects the two together, and that all the girls died b/c “she didn’t watch them close enough.” 

Now I understand why Carol is so against telling anyone about what happened to Lizzie and Mika, for the last time she spilled a big secret she got banished. But what if it’s more personal than that for not telling Daryl…

What if she’s too ashamed to tell him b/c he was the one that told her that she should’ve watched her more… 

Of course he would understand her now, but it would absolutely break my heart if she decides to tell him about the girls and she tells him that he was right, that she should’ve watched her better… and you wouldn’t know if she was talking about Sophia or Lizzie and Mika. 

And of course Daryl would look like he got socked in the gut, and he’d hug her tightly and plead with her to forget what he said. He didn’t mean any of it.

I’m just gonna crawl in a hole now…

Originally posted by phil-molestermoon