one person product

connor murphy headcanons (that no one asked for):

uhhhhh so i did the same thing with jared but here comes another special boy:

- hes actually super fucking blind and he has contacts (he only wears his glasses when hes in Dire Need Of Vision™)
- he plays the ukelele ! he and jared sometimes have jam sessions with their instruments
- he has an undercut but his hair is always down so people forget but then he puts his hair in a bun and people are like “WHAT THE FUCK” (it has an nice intricate triangular design)
- he gave himself multiple stick n poke tattoos throughout high school that have (mostly) faded away but he has a J and E still on each of his ankles
- he knows how to cook hella well (bonus: he owns an apron that says “kiss the chef”)
- hes very clumsy he trips over his own two feet and walking up stairs at least once a week but tries to play it off every single time
- he uses way too much vanilla lip balm (for christmas evan got him a 5-pack of vanilla lip balm and he used all of them up by the time summer came around)
- he plays just dance really fucking well (bonus: one time he threw the remote at the tv by accident when he got too into the dance)
- his laugh is kind of really endearingly ugly its all giggles and then snorts and then dies down to giggles again and some weird wheezing
- hes a rollerskating pro (people expect him to be a skateboarder but one time he got on and it slid from under him and he fell and just laid on the ground for an hour)
- he didnt tell jared and evan his birthday until a year into their friendship (its october 3rd by the way)
- he has a collection of snapple bottlecaps because he thinks the facts are cool and its his most prized possession
- when he was 12 he had a cats phase and zoe has never let him live that down (he starred in a one-person production of cats in his living room for his parents and zoe and its still on film somewhere)
- let him be happy blease!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

feel free to add more to this and/or my jared headcanons too!!!!!!!!

“peggy and maria are played by the same person, marliza is incest”

The Types As Farts
  • Hi I'm human trash. Kill me.
  • ****************************************
  • silent but deadly : INFJ, INTJ.
  • Silent with no impact : ISTJ, ISTP.
  • Sounds like a thunder but has no smell : ESFP, ESTP, ESTJ.
  • Sounds like a thunder, smells like a dead corpse : ENTJ, ISFP, ESFJ,
  • No sound, some impact : ISFJ, INFP
  • HELLA SOUND But isn't that smelly: ENFJ, ENFP, ENTP

I woke up at 3 pm so I declare today to be a fake day

Y’know, a day where you just don’t give a shit and forget responsibilities for a while. A day where you’re like “oh should I do this” and you’re like “nah it’s due in two weeks fuck it”

Enjoy your fake day everyone

Gross and cliché.

Summary;‘You look beautiful.’Phil tells him simply, sincere. Dan snorts, he can’t help it.

(What do i do when i have 15 unfinished long ass WIPS? i post a new one-shot and pretend they don’t exist :’D)

word count; 1,781.

Tw: implied derogatory term, the gay googly eyed love fest.

Ao3 link: ^.^

Have a lovely day! :* <3

Dan looks peaceful. Calm, as though he has no care in the world and Phil finds the sight more relaxing then all of his own vacation experience combined.

He sits down, cross legged on the marble floor, tempted to dip in his just dried legs but easily distracted by the sight of Dan drifting about at a distance. His eyes are closed, lashes gently resting on his sun kissed cheeks.

Phil observes that he hasn’t tanned to a burnt crisp, like his stay in India all those years ago (maybe that was a one time thing), rather he has colored with just a slight highlight, like he has left the house. It’s been good for him, for them, to be away from London a bit, to rejuvenate themselves with the fresh air this exotic island offers, lap up the smidgen of freedom and shelter from prying eyes.

It’s rare to be so free willed outside the bounds of their apartment, their family homes, a gathering of trusted friends or wrapped up in each other’s limbs in some hotel room as they are never not careful in public, but vacations uninhibit them in a mostly refreshing manner. Days like these let them ruffle their feathers a little and shed off the small mundanities that routine brings.

They take Dan’s skin from pasty to a barely present golden hue that Phil fails to accomplish and he seems to practically glow, that wide smile unveiling itself in all it’s heartwarming glory.

There is not a single fiber in Phil’s body that can disprove of that.

Right now though, Dan isn’t smiling, his features are relaxed and yeilding, molded by whatever seems to make it through the veils of sleep to his consciousness and for now Phil notes in approval, that it seems to be bliss.

It is rather hilarious; for being the second clumsiest person he knows, after himself that is, Dan seems to be negating reality and presenting himself as the one being in this universe to reach an epitome of equilibrium. He is gracefully poised in his ridiculously vibrant bright pink donut float, sleeping soundly without a care in the world.

It seems to be a wide contrast from the giant man who can slip over his own two feet to a boyish figure curled up contently in a colorful air-filled balloon, floating over the clear blue of the pool.

He looks so fucking beautiful.

He always does in every form of Dan he morphs into. He does when he cries, snot clogged, over an unappreciated artist or laughs like a hyena over the weirdest thing. But now, the present is whats capturing Phil like a prey that runs straight into a trap.  Dan’s hair is damp and curled, seemingly darker with the wetness, body glistening and lips pouty and red.

Phil is suddenly wistful at the distance between them and although he just dried off he wonders if it would be anything of concern if he took another dip and swam up to his perfectly nestled boyfriend.

Kiss his forehead. Peck his nose.

Phil’s towel droops from his shoulder, slipping off onto the unsanitary floor and he fails to notice, lost in his own little world or rather Dan-filled world(which is anything but little, full of years and years of microscopic memories and tidbits he has in safe keeping, tucked lovingly into the warmest most affectionate spots like centerpieces in a very diverse and magnificent exhibit).

Dan’s sleepy pool adventure has him mesmerized and Phil decides he wants to jump in and at least pinch his freckling cheek.

He is amidst contemplation, his processing somewhat slow due to the distraction Dan presents, like a painting made with the purest of sunlight itself when he hears Wirrow’s chuckle as he nudges past him. The blurred world around him seems to zoom back in for a moment as he is interrupted in his daydreaming.

'Take a picture Philly, it’ll last longer.’

He teases, playfully, jabbing his elbow in Phil’s arm as he makes his way to the table a few steps away, most likely for a drink. Phil rubs the abused skin thoughtfully, it’s actually not a bad idea.

'Lover boy better thank me then.’

Bryony pops up from seemingly nowhere, arm slinging casually around his shoulders as she shoves a camera in his face with a grin, her hair still dripping wet from her splashing match with her miserably defeated significant other.

Phil blinks.

The picture is artistic enough to almost justify the perfection Dan presents, framing his sunlit slumber rather beautifully and Phil’s smile is nothing short of a physical representation of adoration.


'He’d love to post that.’ He ponders as if asking a question not making a statement. She scoffs in reply.

'And lose his edgy monochrome aesthetic? Our Dan? How dare you spit such blasphemous words Phillip?’

Phil shakes his head smiling, as his gaze travels back to his boyfriend who seems to be fidgeting now with his nose crinkling adorably. He predicts Dan’s eyes squinting open in a minute, assaulted relentlessly by the mid-day sun shinning overhead in all it’s cloud free glory.

If they didn’t reel him in now he was likely to flail while sitting up and get a rather big dunk as a nice wake up call.

'Where did you say the pool rod was again?’ He grinned, the sunlight making his eyes even lighter. 'I have a boyfriend to rescue.’

The roll in her eyes was fond as she pointed him in the right direction.


At night when Phil is sprawled with his pale yet sun spotted arm across his boyfriend’s lightly tanned waist, hes watching how Dan’s glow dims from all encompassing, heavenly and sunlit to a sultry absorbing shade of smeared honey. It’s shades varied under the light of the weird-twisty lamp placed like a paper weight on the rickety side drawers.

He whispers what he thinks then, because while Phil is a man of few words (if he can help it, if the places his mind takes him don’t dim reality too much), he is also a man who speaks straight and unabashed from his heart and he lifts his hand to trace the freckles at the spot where Dan’s lashes meet his cheeks and over the bridge of his nose.

'You look beautiful.’

Simple and sincere.

Dan snorts, he can’t help it.

Blatant displays of unfiltered affection still catch him off guard sometimes but he feels too relaxed to make a sarcastic comeback and too in love with this ridiculous man who still looks like Dan’s the sun and the stars and the whole universe they reside in when Dan considers himself unworthy of such deep affiliation.

Loves him like Dan was unused of loving in the lad days of high-school Toms and Harrys where feelings and emotions made you a wuss and a f-, a.. well something completely impolite and if Dan could see them now he would kiss Phil smack on the lips in front of them and declare his undying love with a speech just to see their jaws drop.

He wouldn’t mind kissing Phil smack on the lips anyway, still..

He can’t help the snort-

It’s a natural response his body conjures up yet here he is, this soft and pliant six foot four tall man on slightly musky smelling sheets with truly the best person this world could offer him and he can not find it in himself to make a joke and deflect because Phil too is nothing short of ethereal and he deserves to be told that.

Phil is beautiful inside and out. Dan can’t help thinking of how if could line up all the things Phil considers flaws it would still make a painting Dan could only deem a masterpiece. He knows it in-spite of the insignificant and rare fights. He knows it in-spite of the inevitable bickering. He knows it because it’s true.

The man before him is the one he wonders how he got lucky enough to acquire in all his cereal stealing, pillow cuddling, iceberg footed, completely ridiculous yet amazing unfathomable self and Dan tells his brain to shut up because it’s already stuttering with the way Phil’s looking at him with those hooded pool blue eyes and Dan thinks if he relaxes enough he wouldn’t need a donut shaped float to drift in complete tranquility and absence of any worldly worry.

Phil’s skin is dusky with the countless constellation of freckles, each one just begging to be kissed and nibbled on and while Phil is the biter between them, Dan is the one who loves to leave his mark.( Possessive, Phil teases him on occasion but Dan shrugs with a smirk because he knows Phil loves it too. Loves to be wanted by Dan so passionately, so carnally, and it’s a thing that gets them both hot.)

'You look beautiful.’ rings like a reminder in Dan’s ears, as Phil plays with his curls, twisting his fingers in them and watching them bounce away with no expectation of any reply, no pressure, no need yet the innate knowledge that it will come just because he knows Dan like the back of his hand and Dan knows even if he says nothing in return Phil can read his thoughts better then Dan can read hundreds of discussions on reddit.

Dan feels a wedge in his throat with how much he truly and irrevocably adores this man.

He smiles back, as to numb his initial snort a bit.

'You too.’

An honest reply in a voice raspy with the trails of the day and the oath of silence it took since he laid there, gazing god knows how long at a man he has spent a major fraction of the last eight years.

'Were so gross.’

Dan states fondly, whispering it like a secret.

Phil wonders if he took a sharpie and outlined the crinkles by his eyes would they spell the word love itself like they do without it and he giggles leaning forward till they’re lips almost touch,(A tease since even before they met, Dan would huff out), and whispers back a quiet how he wouldn’t have it any other way.

Dan shuts him up with a kiss.

It’s the most cliche and best way to do it anyway.

The sun has set a long time ago outside. The hefty, ugly-patterned curtains of their hotel window hiding how the moon is shinning silver, full and alluring but all the light the universe around them seems to offer falls pale in comparison to the luster of happiness in their hearts.

It’s gross and cliché.

But they like it that way.

What’s stopping communism from becoming a dystopia like mad max?

when the people control the means of production … one person wont control the means of production … or in this case water… because the people will own the water, not individuals or corporations, the people will make sure all have access to goods, its also a socialization thing, we have to remind others that we can trust each other and have faith in each other and work towards sustainability and bettering the world for all.

capitalism has been really good at creating propaganda that you can’t trust other people. You can trust other people, most people care about others, people aren’t all these demons society makes us all out to be. most people care about others, they just believe that others do not care about them, or would not do the same for them

capitalism incentivizes distrust of other people. It’s good for the market to screw over other people and get the best deal at anothers expense. Communism wont function like this.

In communism we want all to be able to do what they can/like/are able to so we can make our planet the best it can be for all. Which is a goal of our species I believe, as we are social creatures, that’s why we’re so successful.

Again, we just need to give people more reason to have faith in each other, this heavily involves eliminating other forms of oppression to eliminate class dividers, so the classes can rise up against those with power over us that seek our demise.

And in communism, it is incentivized to stop people from fucking over others, it’s a completely different system. Communism flourishes when all are cared for and working at their full potential on what they love to do. Capitalism flourishes when humanity is enslaved to a fuckin corporate overlord, constantly not trusting each other making sure each is getting as much as they can at anothers expense because thats how they’ve been taught.

i have officially posted more Teen Wolf fanfics than Merlin ones and that sort of hurts my heart a little bit in a weird way


I’ve left plenty of room for you to remain you, and you’ve left plenty of room for me to remain me. We both can agree that the distance serves us, rather than hurt us. Even so, on days like today when the clouds move ever so slowly, and there’s nowhere for me to go, my mind wanders. It wanders all the way to you, and wishes this distance weren’t here. You feel as far as the clouds despite the fact you’re so near.

- 5/100 days of productivity -
• went to doctor’s appointment
• met up with indig group for research essay
• went to work
• went to taco bell for the first time

• had a mental breakdown from work

unfortunately not a productive school day