one of them was ugly as sin though

you loved ugliness. you loved it
in everyone, in everything,
until it was no longer ugly.
you made the most wretched things
become beautiful
until no one knew
what the word meant anymore.

you gave wings to the wingless
by tearing off your own.
and though your heart soared with them
your feet never left the ground.
understand child, that our sins
are not always what we’ve done for others,
but in also not doing the same
for ourselves.
—  this is why angels are meant for hell | m.a.w

I remember the first time I learned about homosexuality.

“Homosexuals are sinners.” My grandmother spat, an open bible sat on her lap. There was such an intensity to her voice that it made me recoil. I saw that homosexuality was in the same section as murderers and thieves, but it didn’t feel right. Why would people loving one another be considered a sin?

But my grandmother talked about it with such a disgust that she might as well have been talking about rotting flesh. So if my grandmother hated it I would too.

Even though my stomach turned.
                                                             ____

I remember when I first heard the word ‘gay’ hurled as an insult.

It was third grade and I was on the playground. I watched as two boys fought over who was ‘hotter’. One of them shouted, “Well you’re gay so it makes you ugly.” The entire playground erupted in laughter, and the other boy’s face lit red with shame.

And even though the insult was hurled at him, I was the one who took the biggest hit. There it was again, the belief that two people in love was gross. But my family and friends were against it, so I had to be too. So I shook off the hurt and laughed as well.

Even though it stung.
                                                             ____

I remember the first time I saw two girls kissing.

My mother gasped in horror, like we’d just been flashed. Maybe to her, it felt like we were. She turned, grabbed my hand, and sped by the couple, like they were fire and she didn’t want us getting burned.

“Don’t you ever do that, do you hear me? God doesn’t like it.”

But all I can remember thinking is that I’d give anything for someone to look at me the way those two girls looked at each other. But mom was disgusted so I had to be too.

Even if it hurt.
                                                           ____

I remember the first time I saw her.

It was a new school and a new start. I didn’t know what to expect, but then our eyes met. I didn’t know it was possible to feel lost yet right at home at the same time. Every heart stopping, butterflies flying, knee shaking cliché sucker punched me in the gut. Her smile marked my soul like a tattoo.

But then my family’s words crashed over me, drowning me in a sea of prejudice and discrimination. I felt self-disgust morph into a dragon, my only weapon a wooden sword. So I tore my head away from her and buried my feelings. I killed them every time they came to life.

Even if it left open wounds on my heart.
                                                             ____

I remember the first time I decided not to give a shit.

I evicted years of self-loathing from my body, because I would never let my heart be its home again. I let the love in instead, providing shelter to all the feelings I’d been trying to kill for years. Because at the end of the day, love is not defined by gender or sex. Love knows none of these things, does not need to know any of those things.  Love is a basic human right, and I finally understood that I needed to treat it as such.

Even if not everyone could see that.

—  Above all, remember this; we were all built to love, and who we love is not a broken part of us (N.O)
mists of avalon → sentence meme

This is part four of a many part series of lines and dialogue taken from The Mists of Avalon by Marion Zimmer Bradley. Feel free to change pronouns or anything else to better suit your needs.

  • Do you really think me so tempting no man could resist me?
  • I could not sleep…how is it you ask me what I am doing here when you yourself are not in your bed?
  • I was restless when all around me slept - I think perhaps the moon has gotten into my blood.
  • I think faith is an illusion, and the truth is that we die as the beasts die, and are no more ever - like grass cut down, and last year’s snow.
  • You are so little - I had forgotten how little you are - I could break you with my two hands.
  • Sometimes it seems to me that you are one of the few things in my life which is all good.
  • So here we are again…it seems we have been here before…and this time I will cut off the head of any that interrupt us.
  • Almost you frighten me, when I would keep myself from sin, and yet I have looked on you with lust and wickedness, knowing it was wrong.
  • You are - you are a contemptible fool, _____! You are not even worth cursing!
  • I am not worthy that you should love me so well.
  • Dare you offer insult to my mother?
  • Go from here, lest my babe be born deformed because I have looked on your vile face.
  • You must not be so quick to assign blame to others. If there is fault, it must be your own.
  • Come, dear love, this is folly.
  • Perhaps I should seek to be a priest among the Christians,who, I have heard, teach their priests the secret  of living without women.
  • It is strange. I had known you were wise and a priestess, but somehow I had never thought you were beautiful.
  • Tell me – where have you been? I would not ask, but that whatever it is, it lies heavy on your heart.
  • Why do you think I am any more happy or contented than you?
  • I do not know how I shall live if you go away.
  • I would not lead you into sin.
  • We have sinned already, you and I.
  • Is it true that you know all manner of charms and spells for fertility?
  • I am not your confessor! I have not accused you!
  • I would have you bear this in mind – charms often work as you would not that they would do.
  • But if I am older, then I will need to know more about women than I did when I was a baby, will I not?
  • Oh, stay, if you want to, but turn your back. I’ll not have you staring at me, sir Impudence!
  • Look at his sweet face, like one of those angels, he is.
  • Perhaps if you knocked your head open, you could shove some sense inside it. For sure, it will never grow there on its own.
  • Aye, say it! Mock me with my birth, you – I do not know my father’s name, but I know who fathered you, and between the two I would rather be in my situation!
  • Is that man fit to rule who would forswear his oath for a woman’s sake?
  • Speak the truth to me: how long have you had the Sight?
  • The truth is, I suppose, that her wits are not in the right place.
  • Is it true that I – I am the son of the High King?
  • Dear child, never be ashamed to love.
  • I do not admire his taste. I would sooner be housed in the stable with the other donkeys!
  • I am not the keeper of your conscience. 
  • Don’t be more of a fool than you must.
  • Oh, ______ , in God’s name, what a ninny you are!
  • What can we do, short of murdering the guilty pair?
  • You are wise in charms and spells, cannot you give me a charm that will turn ______ ’s eye from ______ to me?
  • I think that if he married me, he would come to see that I am no less worthy of love than  ______.
  • I do not think women have ever much happiness in marriage – only young girls think so, and I am not so young.
  • Are your charms and spells all moonlight rubbish, then?
  • You despise me, do you not?
  • Say that again, and wife or no, love or no, I will kill you!
  • And what of the king stag when the young stag is grown.
  • Let it be so. You shall make the Great Marriage with the land and with me in her name.
  • I am no traitor - it pains me that you think me so, when you have given me so much.
  • You are as beautiful to me, my dearest, as the day when we were first bedded.
  • You think everyone is wrong but you, don’t you.
  • My mother says that little ones should not contradict grown-ups, and you look as if you were not so much older than I. You aren’t much bigger, are you?
  • If I were older, I would be one of the Companions and my father would make me a knight and I would ride with them!
  • You who have had so many lovers, have you ever known what it is to love?
  • Happy? In that place of evil sorcery?
  • I am not such a good girl, though. I sin all the time. I am always doing wicked things.
  • Why am I being sent away, then?
  • I do not think I am ugly, but you must decide for yourself whether I am good or evil.
  • Won’t you come and tell me goodbye tomorrow? I thought I would be with you here.
  • Never name that well from which you will not drink!
  • Ask, and if I can give, it is yours.
  • I longed for the clean air of the fells, and the gulls’ cry, and your face.
  • But most women are fools, so that I prefer not to trouble myself making play with those who expect me to treat them as something very special, or pay heed to what they say.
  • You have spoilt me for foolish women.
  • It is easy to love him. And while all worship him thus, I have no possible task.
  • Then, their love of him must somehow be made less.
  • Oh, I am weary of ______ …. even  ______ has fallen under their spell. Do not begin to defend them to me.
  • I am weary. I am weary and sick of fighting.
  • I would rather love him, as all men do.
  • Call no man happy until he is dead.
  • So I will be drunk. So let it be. I drink to death and to dishonor.
  • All my life my mother spoke of him as if he were a king or a saint, quite beyond mortal men.
  • No doubt your mother told you I am an evil sorceress.
  • And are you a sorceress, then, lady?
  • I think that being made a king must be a little like being made a priest. They are both sworn to serve man and God and to do what is right.
  • But you did slay a dragon, did you not?
  • I would not have minded if you were truly my brother.
  • Have you come to court to be one of my Companions?
  • I felt I might well see my rival.
  • Will you give me a token to bear into the lists?
  • Why, lady, you had better take back your favor! Would you have your honor so easily disposed of as that?
  • My lady, may I wear your token into battle?
  • ______ seems enchanted by you.
  • Do you think I have need of charms or spells?
  • Perhaps he is glad that I have a lover who will not tempt me to leave him.
  • Do you think I care what that rabble think of me?
  • You bore yourself most bravely.
  • What would you that I should see, my mother?
  • And then – what then? Must I kill him?
  • I do not think fear of the priests, or of God’s wrath, or anything else will ever keep mankind from committing sins.
  • Error is useless and evil must be paid for, sooner or later.
  • Will you play your harp for me?
  • Are you a magician, _____? I sometime feel helpless, that you are working your magic on me.
  • Tell me more of yourself, I want to know everything about you.
  • I am no more than a man, and certainly not less than one.
  • I am a man of flesh and blood, and I love you.
  • You play with me as if I were a lapdog and expect me to be tame as a gelded pony.
  • Do you think because I am a cripple I am less than a man?
  • I wanted you to kiss me, but then you were so fierce, and I was frightened.
  • I cannot live without you. I must have you or die.
  • Will you not have some pity on me, beloved?
  • Say that you love me!
  • I love you. You know that I do.
  • Say that you will give me all your love.
  • You are so young and beautiful, and I am so twisted and ugly, I cannot believe you care for me.
  • Even now I think that I am dreaming, that you have for some reason roused me like this that you might make fun of the beast grovelling at your feet like a dog…
  • _____, will you come to my bed?
  • I know men like to boast of their conquest of maidens. How do I know that you will not brag out it?
  • I would dare anything to be with you, my love.
  • Nothing about you could frighten me, my love.
  • On your oath! You are mine?
  • Wait! You swear it! You are mine! Say it!
  • I am yours! I swear!
  • What will become of him?
  • How is it that you are so untouched by time?
  • Believe me, I love you beyond all else on this earth.
  • Say you so, that the land where an old king rules can only be a land which fades?
  • But you do not know all the vows I have made.
  • What more do you foresee?
  • Do you think I am dealing in sorcery at my age?
  • For God’s sake, lower your voice! Such things should not even be whispered in this place!
  • Here’s a riddle for you - when a man will not mind his property, what’s to be done by those who have an interest in it?
  • Does _____ kiss you like that?
  • Are you jealous of _____? Was it not you who told me to gain their confidence?
  • Already _____ has had more than enough of what is mine.
  • I account to no man on this earth for what I do with what is mine – yes, mine and not yours. 
  • Am I to help you by betraying a woman who has taken the right the Goddess has given to all women, to choose what man she will?
  • I’ll have nothing to do with betraying her.
  • You’ll do what I command you!
  • Command me? Not in a thousand years!
  • I cannot bear to say farewell to you here, must it be this way?
  • Your heart was always with _____, my dearest. 
  • I often think the only sin we did was not that we loved, but that I came between the love you had for each other.

You know how when Ike meets Ranulf in Chapter 7 he calls him a “sub-human” do to not knowing any better?

Well, if you look at the script where everyone survives it doesn’t make much sense. Shinon doesn’t call them Laguz, but Soren does. 

Shinon:
“Dense forests such as these are not made for us delicate humans. The sub-humans love ’em, though.”

Ike:
“These…sub-humans…Are they really so different from us?”

Shinon:
“What, you mean to tell me you’ve never seen a beast-man before? …. Well, I have. They’re a hairy bunch, I’ll tell you. And ugly as sin, too. Their faces are all fangs and whisker. Their claws are like daggers, razor sharp and deadly. And even though they can speak our language, they’re beasts through and through. Savages, every one.”

Ike:
“Are there more than one type?”

Soren:
“The ones Shinon calls “sub-humans” can be divided into three groups, each one named for its physical characteristics. First, the beast tribe, next, the bird tribe, and finally, the dragon tribe. They are traditionally called “laguz.” The laguz tribe residing here in Gallia is the beast tribe, who possess those feline qualities of which Shinon spoke.”

You’d think Ike would get the message, wouldn’t you? It does explain why he corrects himself and asks if he should call Ranulf a Laguz, but not why he still says “sub-human” at all. About the only reason is so we can see what a great guy Ike is, which quite frankly is shown enough during the game that this was unnecessary.

However, there is alternate dialogue for if Shinon is dead. (Usually I’d question how that would be possible, but he has the provoke skill and his defenses aren’t that good.)

Ike:
“Is Gallia beyond this forest? How do the people who live here tolerate this heat?”

Soren:
“Gallia is a country of sub-humans. The climate they prefer is quite different than what we would choose.”

Ike:
“These…sub-humans…Are they really so different from us?”

Soren:
“These sub-humans, or “laguz,” can be divided into three groups, each one named for its physical characteristics. First, the beast tribe, next, the bird tribe, and finally, the dragon tribe. The bird tribes live on the islands south of Tellius. The dragons live to the south as well, in Goldoa. The laguz residing here in Gallia are part of the beast tribe, who possess feline qualities–like razor-sharp fangs.”

There’s a bit of a difference in tone here. Notice the “” around Laguz. I’m interpreting that as Soren offhandedly calling them that and implying that that’s just what they call themselves. He seems to really be brushing the matter aside, unlike in the normal version where he almost seems to be correcting Shinon on the matter.

Should Ike have realized that calling them “sub-human” was a bad idea? Probably. But I find it slightly more reasonable when the alternate dialogue is the one taken into account. It also seems a bit more in character for Soren personally, considering his personal experiences.

anonymous asked:

What would make Guzma cry? Like, completely lose his composure and break down to loud, ugly sobbing that brings him crashing to his knees?

Since I’m already hurting, let’s do one more. Then I need some happiness and sin to make up for it.

- Imagine Guzma getting close to someone. They love him, and he loves them.

- They have some bad habits though, ones that even he knows are bad. He warns them, knowing they could be bad.

- And they listen. They try, and they start to get through it. To grow part it.

- Then one day Nanu comes in and tells Guzma that something bad happened.

- He’d run on his own two feet as he tried to get to them. They’d been going to a meeting, they’d almost been done. It couldn’t be over.

- Nanu would hold him back, try to keep him from seeing. And Guzma would break.

- He’d scream, he howl, he’d lose himself and fall apart.

- When his s/o eventually came to he’d be red faced and staring at a wall. As they called to him his head would snap around to look at them.

- He’d fall to their side and stare at them, eyes wide as he took them in. Then, he’d let himself go, falling to his knees, weeping in relief as he held their hand gently and just let them know just how terrified he was about losing them.

anonymous asked:

I headcanon for reapertale that papyrus is an escort for the completely innocent souls, but sans comes in when he has to weigh their sins, and either assigns them servant roles to make up for their wrongs or condemns them.

Yup, that’s sort of my headcanon as well!

Sans is the Death God, but Papyrus is his “twin.” He only sends Papyrus out to reap the “ready to leave” souls, the ones (usually elderly and animals) that won’t cause a hassle. Sans himself handles all the other gruesome stuff, like murders and reluctant mortals for whatever other reason. He wants to protect Papyrus from the ugly side of death as much as possible.

Sans does all the judging though, definitely. This makes him quite cold/logical/indifferent, so when he meets Toriiiii~ hurhurhur