one of my favorite disney villains

2

Okay, you see this? These are jacket cover/inside cover of a book called “The Beast Within” written by Serena Valentino, who wrote other Disney books that are so amazing. I purchased her first Disney book in the Germany Pavilion in Epcot a few years ago and have bought every other book of hers since. But lemme tell you why this one is my favorite:

Not only is “Beauty and the Beast” one of my favorite films of all time, but the Beast is one of my favorite characters in any film. And this book makes him seem so much more understandable. It’s written in his perspective and there’s literally a scene where he’s so close to being an actual monster that he goes out to kill Belle after she runs away from him.

Did you hear me?

HE GOES TO KILL BELLE.

Of course, he fights the wolves that attack her because in his mind, he’s like “wait I can redeem my human status still” while the beast side is literally chanting “RIP THE FLESH OPEN AND SPILL HER BLOOD EVERYWHERE ALL OVER THE SNOW COVERED GROUND”.

Let me tell you, this book is so good. And it gives more backstory to Gaston (who is, as you guessed, one of my favorite Disney villains).

If you enjoyed the 2017 version of “Beauty and the Beast”, you’ll enjoy this book. It’s different than the film, but just as good, in my opinion.

Plagues Against Mankind That We Shouldn’t Have To Deal With At This Point What The Huck

  • When your hair looks beyond amazing but no matter how many pictures you take it looks bad on film so you’re left alone in your room at 4:43 am suffering because you’ll now never have photographic evidence of the time your hair looked like it was styled by the angel’s themselves just in time for you to rush off to the Royal Ball. Only you will ever have this knowledge. You know the hair will be a mess by the time you see another human being again. Cursed.
  • Un-skippable ads in the MIDDLE of videos. what the hell.
  • When you order a Bloody Mary but it just tastes like straight tomato juice and nothing else
  • When you’re romantically frustrated and No One Wants To Take One For The Team And Just Date You Already
  • M. Night Shyamalan announcing a live action Avatar: The Last Airbender Two in 2017 the Year the Lord Abandoned Us, Apparently
  • The unseen forces that walk and jump on your roof all night long. They sound too heavy to be squirrels or raccoons. You never see anything up there when you check outside. You go back inside and the noises immediately resume, only this time you can now hear them laughing at you. Why Cant The Invisible Edgelords Remain Calm
  • Those birds that just dive right in front of your moving car
  • Owls in places and times where there Shouldn’t Be Owls
  • Donald Trump
  • When the dude living in your walls won’t stop blasting his techno bop music 
  • Having to use your rock pet to kill attacking bugs because you have no other means of defense 
  • the fact that I don’t know how to access podcasts and if I ask I’ll sound stupid
  • When your glasses are always smudged or dirty no matter what the hell you do seriously how the hell has no one invented something to stop this yet
  • When the Slurpee machines are always out of blue raspberry 
  • When people reference ‘the office’ while talking to you but you don’t get the joke because you’ve never seen ‘the office’ and when you tell them that you’ve never seen ‘the office’ they look at you as if you personally skinned their great grandmother alive
  • That…the fricking,,,,,,warm thing in the air that makes my body moist. Why that there. unnecessary attack from the planet. why. I want sweaters not sweat 
  • the fact that I Have No One To See Spider-Man:Homecoming With And I Am Distressed
  • When the wild rabbits don’t pick up on your psychic communication that you are one of them and they run from you
  • When the wine is expired 
  • When your favorite flowers only bloom for like one week a year
  • The fact that you are currently not eating chocolate 
  • Donald Trump
  • The fact that there currently is not Buffalo Chicken Dip entering my body
  • Those people that walk up moving escalators 
  • The guy that dresses up as Sulley in Disney World that grabbed my ass when I took a picture with him
  • Every Villain Is Lemon 
  • When all of your facebook memories are boring or depressing
  • The Cicadas That Are Laying In Wait
  • Those people that are rude to waiters and waitresses 
  • When you wanna write something but you’re hit with the overwhelming feeling that no one will ever wanna read it so What’s The Point
  • Batteries dying
  • The Vampire That Twerks Behind You Every Time You Look In A Mirror But You Can’t See Him Because He’s A Vampire But You Have The Overwhelming Feeling Of Knowledge That There’s A Vampire Twerking Behind You
  • The fact that Owen Wilson will never truly know we Value Him
  • When you’re not even making noise but a random old man complains about how much noise you’re making
  • The fact that there isn’t a 24/7 Law and Order: SVU channel 
  • People who can’t make up their minds about Dr. Phil
  • Cramps
  • really just wanna circle back here to the fact that my hair looks amazing right now I look like a 16th century maiden who is escaping her tower to attend the ball where she must slay the beast to save the kingdom this is my authentic past life coming through to make my hair look effortlessly gorgeous but the camera is not cooperating and No One Will Ever Truly Know 

  • Good tv shows getting cancelled 
  • People that unironically wanna have sex with Bill Cipher 
  • Being awake at 5:36 in the morning
  • The glowing orb that refuses to move out of your sock drawer 
  • Those little green men that sometimes escape out of jars in your cabinets and you gotta battle them for dominance of your own kitchen or else they’ll add too much paprika to all your meals…like, what’s their deal?
  • cats that don’t love you back
  • papayas 
  • Clovers that don’t have four leafs 
  • When you have to have matching socks to look professional 
  • ageing 
  • the T-Rex that insists on stomping down the street every time you’re trying to sleep
  • Aliens being hidden by the government 
  • When you rhyme by accident 
  • When you try to rhyme on purpose but can’t think of anything 
  • The fact that I just had to google how to spell ‘rhyme’
  • Gender Stereotypes 
  • The decreasing firefly population 
  • 7th graders that constantly stick their fingers through circles as a means of silently making sex jokes
  • Weeds that are taller than me I must be the Dominant Inconvenience
  • Fahrenheit vs Celsius
  • Telemarketers
  • Those guys that come up to your house to try to get you to buy Verizon Fios 
  • We’re Running Out Of Chocolate 
  • When John Oliver Steals Words Out Of Your Mouth Before You Can Even Think Them Like The Creature From Midnight
  • Zac Efron not showing up to the HSM 10th anniversary party
  • People who just really causally do splits or impossible stretches while your tensed up immobile ass is forced to watch
  • When You start doing squats but it starts making your butt get smaller and you grow distressed
  • People that are, like, unironically mean to other people. What the f o c k
  • All my socks developing holes in them
  • Crushes that go nowhere
  • the fact that no one ever thinks to respect the soft, gentle Molepeople that have been quietly helping our civilization along without reward for hundreds of centuries 
  • Werewolves getting mistaken for Skinwalkers 
  • The giant ball of flesh under the ocean that’s just waiting to destroy us all
  • People Who Don’t Get Your Sense Of Humor 
  • No one acknowledging your selfies
  • Hunters and Cryptozoologists not taking the hint that Bigfoot simply isn’t interested 
  • The fact I can’t figure out a clever way to end this post



  • Mankind Becoming the Plague Itself 
  • Conan O’Brien and his immense hidden power that everyone chooses to foolishly ignore. One day, he will reveal his true form and strike.
Reasons why Lilo & Stitch is a great movie:
  • Great POC representation with the main characters (most notably Lilo, Nani, and Bubbles) all being non-white
  • Accurate writing/understanding of how little kids think/act
  • No romance plot
    • But speaking of this David is literally one of the best Disney guys out there. 10/10 amazing best dude you’ll ever find
  • Everyone likes to quote the “ohana” part but seriously the family theme in this movie is top notch
  • Lilo and Nani are so damn #relateable
  • Some of my favorite comedic Disney moments are from this movie
    • “GO TO YOUR ROOOOOOOM!!!”  “I’M ALREADY IN MY ROOM!”
    • “Oh good- my dog found the chainsaw.”
  • The movie’s first established villain (Jumba) is actually a giant fucking dork especially at the end when he basically becomes the weird uncle
  • The aliens’ leader is a boss ass space councilwoman with a cool design
  • The movie is literally about a broken family patching itself together with all these different but amazing people(+aliens).  I love it.

Okay so I know there has been a lot of buzz around the internet about the subject of LaFou, sexuality, and queer representation lately and now that I’ve seen the movie, I want to put in my two cents. 

If you’ve been living under a rock for the last few weeks, many people have been talking about LeFou being gay and getting a “gay moment” at the end of the film. Vanity Fair put out an article calling the character “ a touching tribute” to Howard Ashman” Many of us LGBT+ folks are obviously not happy with this character, who is literally “the fool” being a bone that’s thrown to us. Many, including myself, where infuriated by the article because not only was Ashman the man who saved Disney from bankruptcy with hits like The Little Mermaid and Beauty and the beast and the formula he created is still successfully used by Disney today, he was a gay man who died of AIDS. So you can see why many of us think calling a villainous side character a “touching tribute” is a gross cop out on Disney’s part.  On the flip side, some christian parenting groups are made because our existence is acknowledged in anyway, even if the representation is bad. A theater in Alabama even refused to carry the film. Needless to say, many people had lots of opinions. 

All that being said, I’m not here to preach to the choir, nor am I here to argue with anyone about whether of not LGBT+ people are are “appropriate” for a disney movie( hint hint we are) I really want to talk straight people who don’t get why LGBT+ people are upset. I need to share my personal experience with the movie to maybe help some people understand. I know I can only speak for myself, but here it is.

I’ll start off by saying, overall, I enjoyed the shit out of this movie. Beauty and the Beast was one of my favorite films as a child. I knew all the songs, I was Belle for multiple halloweens. I loved the over the top, Rogers -and -Hammerstien esque feel of the remake, i liked the bright colors, the songs and grumpy clock Ian McKellan. I want to get lost in how much I loved it. But every time LaFou came on screen, he was like a fly in the ointment, the irritating itch that kept me from enjoying this ridiculous spectacle for exactly what it was, because every LaFou scene was a gay joke.His mannerisms were carefully an explicitly coded to be recognized as those of a gay man, which are not a bad thing on their own but they were played for laughs and combined with a comic, pining-induced subservience to Gaston. He’s hangs on Gaston’s every word, he tells the girls no to waste their breath, he soothes Gaston’s temper. He’s a joke, one we have seen many times before, a weasely ,queer-coded villain. It’s supposed to be funny to us because we know this silly gay man is NEVER going to have his affections returned and all his work if for not.( ie he’s making a fool of himself, so he’s aptly named)  It’s something you get used to when you’re queer and grow up watching Disney films though, so for the most part, I rolled my eyes and tried to enjoy the scenery. 

Until Gaston’s song started.

Now let me start by saying, that has ALWAYS been my favorite song in the film. I have a very naturally loud voice that carries and as a kid I loved to belt the shit out of it when it came on our Disney’s greatest hits CD. It drove my sister crazy on car trips. It’s so silly and it’s poking fun at this hyper masculine douche bag you’re not supposed to like. Luke Evans had been killing it up to that point and I was so jazzed about it. 

And then, we get LaFou, lounging on Gaston’s chair, gazing at him longingly. Gaston looks at him and asks why the girls to love him and LaFou sighs dramatically, like the comedic stereotype they have set him up to be, and says he hears he’s been clingy.

And everyone in the theater laughs. 

Everyone but me. 

Because in that moment, everything snaps into alarming clarity. I am no longer immersed in the nostalgic euphoria of an actor I love about to preform a cherished piece of my childhood. 

I am a joke and everyone it laughing at me. 

Because that’s what it feels like, when you see someone like you splashed on the screen and their feelings being the thing that makes them laughable. When there mannerism that are directly coded to read GAY PEOPLE are the joke. You see the thing about sterotypes is, some of use have those traits. I am clingy as hell, a joke often made about wlw, which I am. I know effeminate gay men. I know people who have fallen in love with straight people. None of those things are inherently bad or make you a bad or shallow person  but somewhere along the way, straight people decided they made us wrong and decided to use those things against us and turn it into a joke. People in the theater were laughing about LaFou’s pining for Gaston, while I had lost friends because I was queer and some women don’t want to be friends with you if they think you’re going to fall in love with them. The rub of knowing this was a conscious choice on the part of the filmmakers. Why not have Cogsworth rush into the arms of a long lost husband, instead of Mrs. Potts? You can’t tell me Sir Ian wouldn’t have been all for that. You had two promient gay actors in this film, which was scored by a gay man and the best you could come up with the villain’s side kick who’s name means fool? Really?

And adding insult to injury, it wasn’t LaFou as a person that was the fool, his gayness MADE him the fool in the context of the film. It was his pining for Gaston, to try and impress him, that was played to make him look foolish. Do you know what that says to people? That being gay makes you a fool, it makes you a joke. I’m 27, I’ve learned how to pack that shit up and process later, but what if I had been 16? 10? What does that say to gay parents, sitting in the audience watching their child laugh because social cues tell them this thing is funny and you should laugh? What LaFou really says to LGBT+ people, to gay men especially, is that you are good enough to put in the labor, to make this beautiful thing(Ian McKellan and Luke Evans did great work as Cogsworth and Gaston and without Howard Ashman, there would be no beauty and the Beast.), but you are not good enough to be well represented in it. 

So straight Disney fans, before you feel the need to tell us why we are “making something out of nothing” or that we should be “glad” for what we get, or that his half assed “redemption” arc or a single moment of him touching another man made it all better,  I need you to imagine sitting in a theater, and knowing everyone is laughing at you. Laughing at who you are, at the struggles you deal with. Imagine the things that have shaped you being watered down and played for comedy before you tell me what is or isn’t good queer representation. 

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Jim Cummings Love Alert

I love that the man who could sing the most bombastic part of Be Prepared in the Lion King also has the range to sound so kind and meek in the lullaby he sang Gosalyn in the Pilot for Darkwing Duck. One of the few musical moments within the show, but is one that’s always stuck with me. Even in the big sweeping numbers Disney shows and movies give, this is always one of my favorite songs because of how honest, sweet, and caring it is, especially in the context of giving them a moment of peace while running from the main villain of the episode, Taurus Bulba.

Darkwing Duck was sarcastic, bombastic, and had a bit of an ego, but he always had a lot of love and care the times it counted most, especially in being a good father to his adopted daughter Gosalyn. Best damn cartoon.

Now that the anticipation for Stranger Things 2 has died down I can focus on other important things to be over-excited about….like the return of one of my favorite cartoons next week! 

The Battle for Mewni ended on such a big reveal…I’m so psyched to see what the season will have in store with Eclipsa as the new primary villain. Is Star going to be tempted to use her powers for evil?? Will Starco finally be a thing this season??? And if so, what about Tom and Jackie??? Aaaahhhhh I’m so pumped!!! :’0 <3

Epic Movie (Re)Watch #219 - Anastasia (1997)

Spoilers Below

Have I seen it before: Yes

Did I like it then: Yes.

Do I remember it: Yes.

Did I see it in theaters: No.

Format: Blu-ray

1) The prologue.

Originally posted by anastasiasromanovs

The very first few musical notes of the film’s score establish a key element which we will see throughout: a light and playful darkness which helps to accent the film. It fits the fairytale tone well, for that is what Anastasia is: a fairy tale. I’m not too familiar with Imperial Russia or the revolution which marked its end, but as I understand this film is FAR from historically accurate. I think that decision works well for the filmmakers, as making this more of a fairytale with fantasy elements allows for more room to play around (while also not being beholden to history).

Another reason the prologue works - other than setting tone - is that it establishes all the necessary backstory the film needs in a sleek and easily digestible way. We understand what happened to Anya/Anastasia, we understand Rasputin’s anger/motivations, we understand the pain that Anastasia’s grandmother will feel, we see Dimitri’s role in it all, everything comes through clearly. I like that.

2) Okay, question: Why does Rasputin only care about killing Anastasia and not her grandmother if he vowed to kill all of the Tsar’s family? Wouldn’t the grandma be a part of that equation?

Originally posted by yourreactiongifs

3) Here is how it went the first time I saw this film:

[Music builds to a swell as we see St. Petersburg]
Me [sarcastically]: “Oh GREAT, a song about how wonderful communist Russia is.”
Lyrics: “St. Petersburg is gloomy, St. Petersburg is bleak.”
Me [after a moment]: “Oh.”

4) “A Rumor in St. Petersburg”

Whereas the prologue established the world of the past, this song establishes the environment the characters are currently in. We understand really quickly the stakes which motivate Dimitri, why he wants to get out of St. Petersburg, and just how much of a hubbub is around the rumor of Anastasia’s return. Beyond that though, the opening is an appropriate first taste of the film’s original songs. St. Petersburg is a big opening number befitting of a Broadway show (which this film now is) and is greatly enjoyable, much like the rest of the songs will be.

5) Anya/Anastasia.

Originally posted by fadingchildhoodmemories

When it comes to the performance of Anya (I’m just going to call her Anya moving forward since that’s what the film does), the credit must go in equal parts to Meg Ryan and Liz Callaway. As her dialogue actress, Ryan is Anya’s actress the majority of the time. The actress is able to infuse her character with warmth, humor, heart, strength, resilience, and a little bit of sadness all in a captivating way that fits the character design. But Callaway must get the credit she deserves as well, for she is able to take all of the qualities Ryan gives Anya’s dialogue and match it in her singing. This is no easy task, as sometimes having two performers doing voice and song CAN be distracting. But the pair blend beautifully and are able to support the character to the her fullest.

6) “Journey to the Past”

As “A Rumor in St. Petersburg” acts to set up Dimitri’s motivations, “Journey to the Past” sets up what drives Anya. Her search for who she is, for who she was, and any family that may come with that. While that subject matter (Anya confronting the unknown) could be bleak, the song is wonderfully uplifting and inspiring. You ROOT for Anya because of it. You’re invested in her and honestly I think its the best song in the piece. I just love it.

7) I get “Frosty the Snowman” vibes from the ticket seller saying, “No exit visa, no ticket!” Is that just me?

8) Dimitri.

Originally posted by greatspacedustbin

With much less singing (and certainly less solos), John Cusack plays much more of Dimitri than Jonathan Dokuchitz. Dokuchitz contributions are crazy important and well done, something which he deserves due credit for, but it is Cusack who has the responsibility of developing Dimitri more. Cusack’s through his voice is able to expand on Dimitri’s lovable rogue quality, but when he develops into a much more caring person it seems natural. Cusack through his performance is able to blend these two aspects perfectly, showing Dimitri’s heart and vulnerability in an interesting way as the film continues.

9) “Once Upon a December”

A hauntingly beautiful number, this tune always felt befitting of a ghost story to me. As at home in Phantom of the Opera as Anastasia. This is one of the songs which best demonstrate the dark flavors this film dabbles with and it fits perfectly with the rest of the soundtrack. Its wonderful, slightly creepy, and very fascinating.

10) The chemistry is great between Anya and Dimitri, specifically when they’re bickering. Their initial bickering is wildly fun to watch and it translates into trust, love, and respect much more than some live action film couples. It’s an important aspect to nail in getting the audience behind their relationship and the filmmakers do this well.

11) Kelsey Grammer as Vlad.

Originally posted by anastasiasjourney

I like Kelsey Grammer in most things, and this film is no exception. As both the speaking and singing voice for Vlad, the experienced actor gives the rotund figure an incredible amount of life which helps us as the audience get invested in him. I just like it.

12) Hank Azaria as Bartok.

Originally posted by kpfun

It’s Hank Azaria for crying out loud, what more do I need to say? The veteran voice over and character actor enables the lovable henchman to steal every scene he’s in. Bartok doesn’t even interact with any of the main heroes, just Rasputin, but that alone gives him enough comedic material for Azaria’s vocals to carry us away. All in all, it is an incredibly fun and entertaining part.

13) Christopher Lloyd as Rasputin.

Back to the Future is my favorite film, so having Christopher Lloyd in anything is a treat for me. His vocals as Rasputin are INCREDIBLE! He’s playful evil, having a ton of fun in the part which means the audience has fun too. Rasputin is a brilliantly entertaining villain (especially considering he’s stuck on the sidelines for most of the movie), with the physical humor brought about by his decaying corpse leading to some gross/great comedy bits! Rasputin is one of my favorite non-Disney animated villains of all time (if not my favorite). He’s great and has an incredible villain song!

14) “In the Dark of the Night”

Lloyd doesn’t song this song, instead its performed by legendary veteran of voice over work Jim Cummings (Darkwing Duck, Winnie the Pooh, Tigger, Ed from The Lion King, Ray from The Princess and the Frog, and MUCH more). Cummings KILLS IT with his vocal work, making Rasputin both fun and threatening in the number. The tune is dark, epic, and evil throughout. One of the best villain songs in animation because - more than above else - the threat just amplified considerably. We understand Rasputin is not someone to mess with and this song establishes that in a wildly entertaining way. I love it.

15) The scene which best shows Anya’s and Dimitri’s chemistry has to be when they’re on the train.

Anya: “Dimitri, do you really think I’m royalty?”

Dimitri: “You know I do.”

Anya: “Then stop bossing me around!”

Vlad: “She certainly has a mind of her own.”

Dimitri: “Yeah, I hate that in a woman.”

Originally posted by x--hydrangea

16) I really enjoy this film, but one of the things in it I found odd is that the main protagonists go almost completely unaware of the supernatural elements which threaten them. Not until Anya and Dimitri face Rasputin at the end are they conscious of it. If I were to change one thing in the film, it would be that.

17) I always found this little bit of dialogue funny, because Dimitri does think Anya convincing people she’s Anastasia is a lie but we as the audience know better.

Dimitri: “You don’t know if it’s a lie! What if it’s true!”

18) “Learn To Do It”

Originally posted by anastasiasjourney

The Pygmalion elements of the film could easily have been dull filler until we reach the end, but by condensing it to a charming and fun number Anya’s evolution into Anastasia is an interesting and integral part of the story. The number is one of pure joy, life, and entertainment, speaking to the relationship this trio develops on their long journey to Paris. It holds up against the other song quite well.

19) The waltz between Anya and Dimitri is a key turning point in their relationship. It’s the most vulnerable they’ve been with each other up to this point. I like that.

Originally posted by vladimir-todd

20) Anya’s dream.

There’s a nice sense of heightened reality in the dream’s visuals which (with a unique color palette) helps make it feel beyond reality. While cheerful in appearance, mixing the scenes with Newman’s score means we understand there’s danger even before we see the monsters in Anya’s head. The way the film cuts between dream and reality also works well, as the flow of the scene is never disrupted. All in all, it just works.

21) Angela Lansbury as the Dowager Empress.

Originally posted by anastasiagifs

Our first encounter with the Empress in modern setting shows her off as grumpy, jaded, and impatient. But what’s important is that we understand WHY she’s this way. The audience sees the tragedy in her not only through the film’s prologue but also through Lansbury’s performance. That heartache is wonderfully present throughout and when it turns to joy at finding her Anastasia the effect is wonderful. But more on that later.

22) Bernadette Peters as Sophie.

A broadway legend, Peters actually objected to Sohpie’s curvy appearance since she herself had actually lost weight. Despite this, the actress (much like Grammer with Vlad) breathes a wonderful amount of life into Sophie. It’s hard to imagine anyone performing the charming and energetic character since she just feels so natural/alive. While relegated to the third act, Sophie is definitely a memorable part of the film and Peters’ performance is an important part of that.

23) “Paris Holds The Key To Your Heart”

Originally posted by fromthemotionpicture

In terms of how the tune serves the story, it stands to set up Paris as a location much like “St Petersburg” did in the opening with its titular city. But beyond that, it allows us to juxtapose how far the characters have come. This is it, their final destination, which results in a joyous night on the town. Anya is the happiest she’s been in a while and Dimitri has grown up a lot, ready to let go the woman he cares for so she can have what she wants. Like many of the others, the tune is wildly entertaining and just takes you on this wild night in Paris wonderfully.

24) The fallout between Dimitri and Anya when she finds out his INITIAL motivations is particularly heartbreaking, largely because those are no longer his intentions. For the first time in his adult life he’s actually trying to do the right thing, which creates incredibly high stakes for him (which we see when he freaking KIDNAPS THE DOWAGER EMPRESS! Also in how he turns down the reward for finding Anya). It’s a wonderful if painful moment.

25) When the Empress first meets with Anya she’s guarded and dismissive, which makes sense. It’s self preservation at this point. But that just means it is all the more wonderful when she realizes it IS Anya, that neither of them are without family anymore, and she can finally let herself be open to happiness. (Although, it’s kinda weird that all of Anya’s memories come back at once.)

Originally posted by anastasiagifs

26) If I ever go to a high school reunion (which I don’t plan on doing), I gotta use this line.

Rasputin [upon seeing Anya]: “Look at what the years have done to us. You a beautiful young flower, me a rotting corpse!”

27) I talked about this a bit more in note #16, but I wish Rasputin took a more active role in the plot. That there was more interaction between him and the heroes. I really like the action of the climax, where Anya and Dimitri go at it with him, but I wish I’d had a bit more of that in the film.

28)

Rasputin [thinking Anya died]: “Finally, the last of the Romanoffs dead!”

You know, except for her grandma.

29) I love happy endings which aren’t really endings (when they’re done like this, not so much when they’re cliffhangers).

Sophie [when she learns Anya and Dimitri eloped]: “Its a perfect ending!”

Empress: “No, it’s a perfect beginning.”

Originally posted by lingerx


Anastasia is one of the more underrated animated films out there. It’s got all the hallmarks of a classic - great music, memorable characters, an awesome bad guy, strong voice acting, a strong story - but not nearly the following of Beauty and the Beast or Aladdin. If you haven’t yet, I would recommend putting in Anastasia.

anonymous asked:

2p's at Disney World (you know you want to answer this question, hehehehe~)

SHOW YOURSELF
LET ME LOVE YOU
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA THIS IS MY FAVORITE ASK SO FAR OMFG

2P Italy: how the fuck did anyone manage to get this guy to Disney World?? anyway, he’d dress up as some villain from a Disney movie and go around scaring poor innocent children until the Disney worker people heard about it and called the cops

2P Germany: rides every single roller coaster, flirts with all the Disney workers dressed as princesses……possibly buys himself a Cinderella dress, puts it on, and runs around wearing only one shoe

2P Japan: again, how the fuck did anyone get this guy to agree to go to Disney World??? well I guess he’d ride only the scariest rollercoasters, but mostly he’d sit down on a bench somewhere and stare at shit on his phone until he could leave

2P Romano: yeah this guy legit walks into the Disney princess dress store and buys himself a Sleeping Beauty dress (“I liked the style of the Belle dress, but yellow is just not my color”), then runs into a bathroom somewhere to change into the dress and put on makeup. A lot of kids mistake him for one of the Disney workers dressed as princesses so he ends up letting like 34189374 people take pictures with him

2P Prussia: best day of his entire fucking life, I swear to god—- he feels so at peace as he sees all the happy families hanging around and he ends up riding all the roller coasters and staying at night to see the fireworks (omg he’s the only one who does normal Disney stuff while he’s there)

2P France: tbh he probably stays in the hotel room and watches porn. He might go to the dress store and buy himself a tiara, for some reason??

2P America: eats a bunch of food and then goes on a roller coaster, vomits all over a bunch of kids, ends up being escorted off the premises

2P Canada: wanders around aimlessly until he just goes in a bathroom and sits on a toilet while he watches Grey’s Anatomy on his phone

2P England: gets himself a tiara and a magic wand (also known as an overpriced stick with a star on one end), then runs around gently hitting kids on the head with the wand and saying “bippity boppity boo”

2P China: after he smokes weed in a bathroom, he goes on the same rollercoaster 6 times, buys himself an inordinate number of stuffed animals, and throws his entire wallet into a fountain while saying “dis better be enough to make mah wish come true muthafucka”

2P Russia: accidentally scares a bunch of kids by looking too serious, ends up sitting on a bench alone, feels pretty sad until one kid runs up to him and starts talking about how they want to grow up to be big like him one day awh

Disney Villain Apologist

I like to explore ethics and the nature of good and evil. I love “origin of evil” stories, and retellings from the villain’s perspective. When I watch movies/read books, I generally empathize with the villain. 

I watch horror movies and cheer for the monster. Which, makes sense because I’m one of the creatures humans like to cast as the monster. I’m a proper faerie tale villain.

So, I’m gonna go down a list of well known Disney villains, and justify their actions.

Snow White:

So we start out of the gate with a tough one. Not because her actions are difficult to justify, but because we know nothing about Queen Grimhilde. The story starts in the middle.

Where did she come from? How did she come to be Snow White’s step mother? Is vanity really the only reason she hates Snow White? I doubt it.

She’s a two dimensional character who must have a story, and we have no right to judge her until we know what it is. 

Besides, Snow was kind of insufferable. This is a movie with eleven characters. Only two are women. One is a perennial victim with no agency over her own situation, and the other is painted as the villain. There’s something fishy here.

Cinderella:

Okay so Lady Tremaine was awful (and she dies in the original faerie tale) but the step sisters are just as much victims as Cinderella herself. Their mother was abusive to all three of them. She was just worse to Cinderella. That’s often the case with abusive parents. They are emotionally abusive and neglectful to all their children, but they pick one to be their preferred target.

The step sisters became awful out of self defense. In some other versions of the tale, one or both of them actually apologize to Cinderella, and mean it. It doesn’t get them out of well deserved punishment for being terrible to her, but it redeems them a little.

Alice in Wonderland:

The Queen of Hearts has some kind of undiagnosed and untreated mental illness. It’s illuminated in the book that the King quietly pardons people behind her back, they show back up at court the next day, and she doesn’t even notice, because she’s delusional and they’re doing their best to cope with it. As the Cheshire Cat said, everyone’s mad here. There are no therapists to take her to.

Peter Pan:

This one has some deep symbolism, and it’s kinda cool. Captain Hook represents old age and inevitable mortality. That’s what everyone’s afraid of, but it’s not something to be feared, it’s just part of the process. Peter’s refusal to grow up, and influencing others to follow in his footsteps, was holding them back from their potential. The protagonists went home because they realized it was actually a pretty toxic environment.

An alternate fan interpretation (which was not the intention of the original author) is that the Lost Boys are dead, and Peter is a spirit keeping them from moving on, and Hook is Death itself. Wendy and her brothers had a near death experience and went to Neverland.

Sleeping Beauty:

Ah, here’s my favorite Disney villain. This one requires some knowledge of politics. It wasn’t just a party. This was 14th century Europe. I think the tale is French, specifically. The Christening of a royal child was a major political event. It Mattered who was and was not invited.

If you had two neighbors, and they weren’t on the best of terms, and you invited one but not the other, you were picking sides in a potential war.

Which is what King Stephan did. He sided with the Seelie court over the Unseelie. The “good faeries” weren’t actually good. They were Seelie. Which means they look pretty, but they’re just as dangerous and just as unpredictable.

This was a slight that would have risked war if he’d done it to a human. Faeries take those things far more seriously, and he knew that. He should have known that failing to invite her was going to lead to trouble.

Maleficent even gave him an opportunity to apologize. She was prepared to pretend she thought it was a mistake and allow him to save face. He threw it back at her and insulted her. And she cursed the kid when she could have cursed them all and destroyed the entire kingdom, and by fae standards would have been totally justified.

Stephan was a moron. If he’d invited her, or even just apologized and moved on, the faeries would have given the most awesome gifts they could in an attempt to one up each other, as opposed to the party favors Aurora wound up with.

I find Maleficent very relatable. Fae witch with a corvid companion who has fun with curses, references infernal contacts, and is secretly a dragon. I like.

The Sword In The Stone:

Madam Mim was just playing a little game. Merlin was an insufferable pompous jerk to her. Clearly they have a history of him being that way. It’s no wonder she wanted to break his toys.

The Little Mermaid:


This one’s actually really really easy.

So, the bit about how Ursula has her little garden… She casts spells for people. Magic has a price, which someone has to pay. She has to give something up to work her magic for people, and they sign a contract about payment. It’s not her fault if they fail to fulfill their end and complete the contract. They are responsible for the consequences of their decisions, and blaming her is a cop out.

As for her specific arrangement with Ariel, which required Ariel to find something (true love’s kiss) to seal the spell and bind her to the human world, Ursula was totally justified. Her plan from the first moment was for Ariel to fail, and then trade her for her father.

She had good reason. She’s Triton’s sister. That’s canon, it’s in a scene they cut for time. She’s the rightful queen and he stole the throne. Of course she’s bitter.

Aladdin:

Jafar spent his entire life serving an incompetent boob who’s running the state into the ground. He went a little nuts, and went a little over the top, but if you think about it, he never actually hurt anyone but the abusive royal family and an apparent kidnapper turned imposter prince.

The Lion King:

There’s canon somewhere that Scar got the scar when he saved Mufasa from a wildebeest stampede when they were kids. He could have let Mufasa die then and he would have been king, but he was maimed in a selfless act, and they named him after the mark he got for his troubles. Mufasa was an arrogant jerk. Having saved the king’s life, Scar was relegated to a little alcove off by himself on the edge of the pride. No wonder he wound up bitter.

Also, The Lion King is Hamlet with animals and he can’t help that Shakespeare wrote him as a villain.

Hercules:

Ugh. They butchered my pantheon, and Hades is the only one who isn’t totally absurd.

STOP MAKING HAIDES THE BAD GUY!

Within the narrative of the story, the background is Zeus tricked and/or forced Hades into the Underworld while the other gods got to party it up on Olympus.

The fact that there’s no actual mythology for this and Haides isn’t unhappy with his kingdom not withstanding, the movie character has every right to be pissed.



There are a lot more of these I could do, but these are some of my favorite highlights, so I’ll leave it at that. Hope you enjoy, and I’d love to hear additions or counter arguments anyone wants to make.

While all are drawing fanarts for the premiere of the Games of Thrones, I draw fanarts for the premiere of the second part of Disney Descendants.

Soooooooo YEAH I`M SO EXITED KITTENS

This is one of my VK`s fanarts and it`s my favorite kid - Evie. I love her so much, I think that the best pairing ever is Mevie and OH I REALLY FELL IN LOVE WITH HER LOOK AND BEHAVIOR. She is totally my favorite character from both movies. 

8

Shan Yu (Mulan 1998)

Okay so someone, definitely NOT my big brother, asked me why I didn’t do redraw anymore. It’s because I was busy ! And as you can see I’m not busy anymore !

This time I left my usual Rick and Morty redraws to make my 5 favorite Disney Villains !

I challenged myself a little:
-The screenshot must come from their respective songs
-Thre must be either an interesting light or pose (I think it’s a nice and fun exercice to practice more !)

Frollo From The Hunchback of Notre Dame!

Drawing 2 

No Red Ink

Who else out there has to go to this website called No Red Ink for English? Whether you’re in high school *cough* me *cough* or collage or just love writing. I don’t know.

Well anyway, for the people who don’t know what No Red Ink is, let me explain for you. No Red Ink is this website where you practice grammar, spelling?, well things like that. Basically the website helps you to become a better writer. The cool thing is when you sign up for it, they ask you to pick out some of your favorite things if they have it. For instance, some of you favorite tv shows like Sherlock (thats one of the shows i can remember at the top of my head), Gravity Falls, etc, but they also have famous actors and actresses, movies, authors, video games, superheroes/villains, Disney, sports, etc. You can even add your own friends, family, and pets.

Well anyway, I use No Red Ink for home work and thought that some of the sentences they used for problems were pretty funny, so i thought you guys might like them, too.