So at my very worst period of mental illness things were pretty freaking awful. I was dealing with psychosis, near constant panic attacks, what they called “severe bipolar 1” plus some sort of unidentified personality disorder. Basically, things were really really bad and had been for a long time. But here are some of the things that helped me when I was dealing with a 2 month psych hospitalization that summer
Noticing the color of the sky
Nice scented lotion
Taking long showers
Making sure that I was hydrated & well nourished
Taking deep breaths
Keeping my living space neat
Putting on nicer clothes & doing my hair
Honestly I was able to recover precisely because I started paying attention to moments like these. At the time I was still pretty miserable, but it was a major break through to realize I could appreciate the colors of the sky & grass, or the sound of rain, or the cozy feeling of a bookshop. It’s hard to articulate how much it changed things for me.
Of course, I had a lot of other support too, and I’m not trying to say this alone cured me. I also know that stuff that worked for me in recovery didn’t work for my peers in treatment and vice versa. But I do beg you not to dismiss stuff like this that’s offered without judgement, like in self care posts. For one - you don’t know what the OP has been through & there is no reason to invalidate them or mentally people who do stuff like this – You just can’t correlate the severity of symptoms to what kind of things help.
And two - it’s not good to spread the idea that enjoying little moments, or doing common self care this is only for non mentally ill people. In fact, we are often the ones who can benefit the most. And it’s a shame to spread the idea that none of these things can work for any mentally ill person when that’s just not true & could prevent someone from doing something that could help. Treating severe mental illness is a big problem, but it’s often made up of lots of little changes
Favorite solangelo moment(s)? Or just some of your favorite Nico or Will moments?
You pose a good question my friend.
There aren’t many moments to choose from unfortunately… I think I’m going to go with in Blood Of Olympus when Nico shadow-travels in and Will sees him and they banter - basically their first interaction.
Will talks to him like they’re friends and thinks Nico is dumb for thinking he has no friends AND starts all this off by saying I delivered a satyr baby hold my hand. Like, what Will, why is that important at this very moment. Nico through all this thinks about his admiration for Will when he was a medic in The Last Olympian and also argues with Will (as in Will also argues back which is unheard of towards Nico Di Angelo).
I just really love stuff that leads up to them getting together. All the couple stuff is cute and I love it but the angst and pining and flirting and all that goodness that comes before being in the relationship just MMM love it.
My favourite thing about that episode was actually the fact characters acknowlegded and actually discussed the fact that as soon as Carol finds out about Glenn & Abe she would start a war. That she would march on up to Negans compound and fuck. That. Up.
None of this passive “She can take care of her self” just flat out, Yeah she would march into battle and kill a bitch.
hello, loves! i’ve had this idea in my head for a little while now, and i’ve finally been able to put the words to the page! i’m really happy with how this turned out, so i hope you enjoy! please let me know what you think!
huge thank you to the lovely @takemeawaytocamelot for being the best motivator and cheerleader ever, as well as my other tss ladies who are always the most supportive bunch. 🤗
IMPORTANT: THIS IS STRICTLY A ONE-SHOT. NO MORE PARTS WILL BE WRITTEN.
-the eldest bairn, kait xxx
“Did you really think that I would swallow this… fairytale? Do you think I’m still five years old?”
“It’s not a fairytale, Bree.”
The door shut behind her with a sharp bang! that echoed throughout the house, reverberating off of the walls and causing the vanity to shake. Unperturbed with the state of the mirror or the trinkets that surrounded it, she stomped over to the bed and unceremoniously plopped down on it, grasping the hairbrush and angrily running it through her hair.
All of her life, she thought that she was someone else–countless times she had helped her father, spending hours upon hours looking through their genealogy chart in an attempt to trace their ancestry throughout Europe. He had played along, telling her about his grandparents and great-grandparents, all the way to the eldest ancestor that they knew of: a Captain of Dragoons, stationed in Scotland with a pristine record and high regards from the Crown for his service. Frank had always talked so highly of him, but whenever his name was mentioned, her mother would leave the room.
She realized that her mother never truly told her much about her own heritage, just about Uncle Lamb and her parents, but besides that…
I suppose she wanted to keep that under wraps, too, she thought, brushing the other side of her head.
A moment passed before she fully paused, looking down at the curling waves of her auburn hair. Her father didn’t have red hair–granted, neither did her mother. She remembered asking him once where her red hair came from, and he had just replied, “One of your relatives.”
One of my relatives. My father…?
She set the brush down on the bed, running her fingers through the soft strands. As much as she didn’t know right now, one thing was certain: Frank Randall was not her biological father, this Jamie Fraser–whoever he might be–is. However, that was the only straw she could grasp from the bunch that her mother gave her; she had lost Brianna as soon as she said Culloden.
How could one believe such a tale? Her father apparently did–the other one.
So many emotions were coursing through her veins, but the one of highest supply was frustration and anger. She felt betrayed by her mother, of whom she felt had lied to her all of her life, making her believe that Frank Randall was her biological father. And after a moment, anger seemed to triumph over all other emotions, and she flung herself off of the bed, pulling a bag off of the floor and stuffing as much into it as humanly possible. She needed to get out of there. Now.
After realizing that not everything was going to fit if she kept shoving everything into the small opening of the rucksack, she instead started emptying the contents onto the floor. She shook the bag harshly, taking her anger out on the innocent fabric pack, before she heard something plop unceremoniously onto the floor. At first, she didn’t recognize it, but after a moment’s pause, her racing pulse leveled.
It was a small, leather-bound notebook, no more than 5 inches in width, 6 in height. The book was about 100 pages thick, covered in both her mother’s and her own scrawled hand across the pages, alternating between different colors of ink.
A fairy-tale told to her by her mother in her youth.
A five-year-old Brianna Randall sits upright in bed, excitedly gripping the edges of her quilt as she waits for her mother to return home. At this point, they had their schedule down to a science: Claire would walk in the door, go straight to the eagerly-awaiting Brianna, and she would recount to her daughter the adventures told the night before.
Tonight, however, was different. Daddy had come home from the University with a beautiful leather-bound, handheld notebook. “Fill it with whatever your heart desires, little beauty,” he had said, and she took it to heart. She would fill it up, cover to cover, with her favorite story of all time.
Her heart began to race in excitement as she heard her mother’s voice coming from downstairs, the beats getting more frantic as she heard the footsteps getting closer and closer. When the door finally opened and the bright blue scrubs came into view, she jumped up and down in her bed.
“Mama, guess what I got from Daddy today!” She squealed, thrusting the notebook at her mother in excitement.
“Oh, Bree, how lovely!” She examined the book delicately before handing it back to her daughter. “What will you write in it?”
Bree giggled, “Silly Mama, our story!”
Instead of replying right away, she swallowed hard, turning herself away from her daughter and towards the window. Confused, Brianna ignored this strange behavior and went to her desk, pulling out a pen and holding it out to her mother. “Write, Mama?”
She cleared her throat once before turning back around, a smile forming on her lips. “Of course, love. Now, where did we leave off?”
“No, we have to start over!”
Smiling, Claire took the pen from her daughter’s tiny hand and balanced the book on her knee, starting to write. While she wrote, she had Bree read the words out loud to her.
Once upon a time, in a far away land, there lived a King and his fair Queen. The pair loved each other very much, and to prove that their love was eternal, the King took his wife away from the business of castle life to a remote village in the mountains.
While there, they visited their subjects and attended to their duties, as Kings and Queens do, but one day, the Queen was separated from her King and fell through a portal to another world. Frightened and alone, the Queen ran for miles and miles to find her King, but couldn’t find her way back. Getting lost in the ever-thickening wood as she ran, she encountered the most fearsome dragon in all of the Worlds. Fortunately, however, she was rescued by a knight in shining silver armor and taken away to safety.
On the way to the castle, the Queen’s escort introduced himself as Sir James the Red, Knight of Lallybroch. The Queen introduced herself only as Christine, in fear that someone would recognize her.
For many months the Queen took refuge in the new castle, Leoch, becoming a guest of it’s King and making many friends among the subjects. One day, after a great Gathering was held, the Grand Duke requested she be present on a hunt, to which she agreed. While on the hunt, she became very close to Sir James, who promised to protect her from anything and everything she could encounter on the journey.
And as Sir James predicted, Christine came face-to-face with the monstrous dragon once more. With his fiery breath, he burned her repeatedly. But ever so true to his word, her Knight came to save her and, in order to protect her, offered his hand to her, which she accepted. The two of them became extremely close while continuing the hunt. She missed her King dearly, but was starting to accept her life with her red Knight in shining armor.
Eventually, the Knight found out about her travels through time, and offered to take her back home. They traveled on horseback for days while the Queen figured out what her heart truly wanted. Her duty was to her King, but how could she leave her Knight, a man that she had grown to love more than life itself?
It all came down to a single choice. Sir James took her to the portal, where she had to make her final decision. Who did she want to be: Christine the Queen, or Christine, the Knight’s wife?
In the end, she chose Sir James. The pair went back to his home, to begin their happily ever after. That is, until the creature returned, this time to take him for retribution, and it was up to Lady Christine to be her Knight’s savior.
With the help of Sir James’ fellow knights, and a few cows, Lady Christine was able to save her knight in shining–
“Mama,” Bree, now an inquisitive eight-year-old, interrupted, looking at her mother in confusion. “What did the cows do?”
Claire laughed, caught off-guard by her question. “Well, Sir Marcus decided that it would be the easiest way to get Sir James out of the dragon’s keep, without drawing too much attention.”
Bree’s eyebrows creased together and her lips pursed outward. “But… wouldn’t a large group of cows draw attention to them, anyway?”
“Do you want me to continue or not?”
She nodded eagerly, leaning away from the headboard.
Lady Christine was able to save her knight in shining armor, and together they traveled away to a distant land full of delectable foods, beautiful dresses, large parties, and lots of intrigue. But Sir James’ experiences with the monster left him scarred, emotionally and physically. She tried her best to help him, but nothing she did soothed his suffering. Eventually, their marriage began to crumble, and she feared she would lose her husband.
One night, she talked to him about it. He told her all of his heart, as one should in a marriage, and the patches seemed to be healed. However, when the evil creature returned for his just desserts, Sir James vowed that he would be the one to slay it. Afraid for her husband’s life, as well as the dragon’s, she begged him to leave it be. His grudge, however, would haunt him forever as he attempted to slay the beast, eventually doing so with all three of them seriously injured. Lady Claire saved Sir James once more, and, after losing their faith, the pair moved back to their country to be with their family. Fate, however, would not be on their side.
A war was rapidly approaching, and as much as they tried to stop it from coming, Sir James and Lady Christine were faced with no other choice. Pregnant with his child, he sent them back to her own time, where they could be safe in the protection of the King.
“She never goes back to him?” Thirteen-year-old Bree inquires of her mother with her elbows on her knees and her hands resting beneath her chin.
Claire pauses, swallowing an invisible lump in her throat. “No, she doesn’t.”
“Why not? If she truly loves him, wouldn’t she want to be with him forever?”
“Of course she would.” She smiled softly, wrapping her arms around Bree’s shoulders. Leaning her head on top of her daughter’s, she asked, “Do you remember the battle, the one that they were all preparing for at the end of the story?”
Bree nodded, urging her to continue.
“Well, before they parted, Sir James promised m–Christine–” She cleared her throat. “He told Lady Christine that he would die on the battlefield, defending his country. And she took his word for it.”
“So, she didn’t even try to find him? Not even for the chance that they could be together again?”
Tears formed in Claire’s eyes, but Bree couldn’t see them. Instead of replying, she finished the story.
Lady Christine returned to her time and resumed her position as Queen. She was reunited with her King, and he promised that they would raise Sir James’ child together, as their own.
A few months later, a princess was born, and they named her Ellen, after Sir James’ mother. And together, the three of them lived a happy life, the child unaware of her true parentage.
Every once in awhile, however, the Queen would see her daughter’s red hair catch the light, and she would see her husband. Her red Knight.
happy birthday al! @alpinesquid you’re always such a good, nice friend, thank you. I really appreciate your friendship, and I hope you have an amazing birthday! you deserve it! continue being a rad, cool kid! B)
24 hours after the best 2 hours of my entire goddamn life.
let me start by saying that i love all of you beautiful people that were at the concert and in the queue, you were all beautiful, we were all colourful, and thank you all for being the kindest most loveliest people ever. also thank YOU, Harry, for creating an environment where so much love and kindness can blossom and spread, where everyone feels loved and free. THANK YOU; ALL OF YOU!
now here comes the story of how my day went. The 27th of october in all its glory!
I got into the queue at about 7am with Jule, Mira and Evi, where we immediately got talking with other rainbow clad beautiful people. The one I wanna mention in particular is Chantal, with whom i was rubbing cheeks after 30 seconds so that some of the glitter on my cheeks might get onto hers, bc sharing is caring.
The wait was cold, and long, but FUN bc i was surrounded by the BEST PEOPLE! Some of the hightlights happened when i started going around to give away the beautiful rainbow hearts @beatingfortwo had given into my care. SO many people were so so eager to get a heart! Were excited and lovely and were so happy when they found a heart with their colours! Others hadn’t heard of the hearts before and were blown away by how much work was put into them, stressing how lovely they were!! At one point, what felt like two blocks down the queue, there was a group of fans that had managed to build themselves a little tent in the middle of the queue, under which they were sitting on small chairs with a small table in their middle enjoying a little bit of sparkling wine. When i came by with my hearts, one of them gave me a bright smile and sad: “Hey do you want some? I think it’s only fair if you get something in return for your lovely hearts!” And so she gave me her glass and we shared a lovely moment, huddled in their tent with rainbow hearts and alcohol, while outside the drizzling rain wouldn’t let up. If you, lovely sparkling wine girl, should ever see this post, you were very lovely, thank you!
Another hightlight was when I ran into a mum waiting outside the queue with her children who asked me about the hearts. She was so lovely, and complimented them and got herself one out and then she offered me 1,50€, which i tried to decline, bc those hearts are for FREE! Love and safe spaces are for free! But she said: that kind people should be met with kindness and that she wouldn’t take the money back! I thanked her and told her that i would get myself a cup of hot cocoa for that money, for which she then said: Oh, dear, then take another euro with you, so that your friend can have one as well!!
Dear lovely mum? You were wonderful! THANK YOU! (i really needed that hot cocoa after a while, you saved my night!!)
Another lovely rainbow clad angel threw a whole package of oreos into my box of rainbow hearts as a thanks and that also melted my heart!! YOU WERE ALL SO LOVELY!!!!
While handing out the rainbow hearts i met @pattern-pals who got started with her flower buttons, and not only am i incredibly happy that i managed to see you, bab <3 <3, but im also incredibly happy how well received your buttons were bc they were so creative and beautiful and everyone loved them and just… i guess this is a shout out!
Back in line, Chantal and I were becoming fast friends, and we were all huddling together for warmth with our other friends (Evi, Mira, Jule) and eating our snacks. Snacks were shared among all of us in the queue! I got Gummibears from people on my right, cheese sticks from a lovely group of girls from the netherlands on my left and in front of us were three adorable and beautiful Austrians that gave Chantal and me a jigger each at about 4pm, when we all raised a small toast for Harry Styles. Everything was LOVELY! All around us were the rainbows people had brought with them, there were rainbows flags given out for the sott project, there were rainbow bow pins, there were rainbow buttons, there were rainbow stickers that had: treat people with kindness, wirtten on them, …. we were all drowning in rainbows and it was so so beautiful.
Let’s jump to the concert.
Harry Styles is the loveliest, most talented angel and i cannot thank him enough for the things he has done for me. It starts by him spreading the message of kindness and love, and compasses things like how he helped me come out as trans, how he gave me the pride! and strength to be loud about who i am, how i only had the bravery to buy AND bring a trans flag out i public, to a concert, when he brought them on stage on his own!, it includes the reality of the fact that he is a big part of why i overcame my depression earlier this year unscathed, and it ends with me making so many great amazing friends through him (and ofc one direction as a whole).
By now you have probably all seen the videos, and seen the venue shining in all the colours of the rainbow!! Being there was….. something else. And i don’t think i will be able to summarise any of it, bc im still a mess about it all. But he saw it, he saw us, he thanked us, he said we were colourful and he thank us for being nice to each other and for being nice to him. I don’t know how to thank him, but he did a lovely job of it, so i’ll follow his example: THANK YOU!!!
What didn’t happen was his speech about embracing a stranger in the audience, which i think he forgot bc of kiwi 2.0, but it doesn’t matter, because…. when the lights went back on…. everyone, friends from before, new friends from the queue, people you only met in the venue, every one turned to eachother and we HUGGED!! I was hugged by two lovely girls that i only met in the venue, in the hour before MUNA came on stage, and they saw me struggling not to cry and they both hugged me, squeezed me tight and they were so lovely. Chantal hugged me, I hugged Evi, behind me people were hugging, no one was leaving, no one was even trying to gather their things… we were all just….. loved. loving. spreading love. and ofc that was US! only US! but also…. harry you’ve done it. You have created one of the safest and warmest spaces for us, and you spread love with so much impliciteness that it is so easy and natural to follow your example and i love you so much for that!
I love all of you lovely people that got to experience Cologne with me.
I’m one of the many Slytherites in my group of friends and it feels great to be with many like minded individuals with different personalities. Unfortunately, I often feel like I’m the ‘one with the book smarts’. It’s gotten to the point were my friends have started calling me “Head Girl”. I’ve got pretty mixed feelings. It’s nice that people think that I’m intelligent, but it’s starting to feel like no one things of me of anything more. At least I make my house look good.
Anonymous Requested: Bellamy x reader request where he comes to her asking how she feels so confident with how she looks (aurburn hair, curvy) and how she doesnt give a shit about what people think of her. Because he feels insecure an a piece of meat (like how bob feels in reality). With fluff an maybe smut? Canon or mordern i don’t mind ♡
Pairing: Bellamy x Reader
A/N: Do you like my new layout? ;)
“How do you do it?”
You turned around to Bellamy with a curious expression, his question not making sense in your mind. “Excuse me?”
“You- You’re always so confident, so sure, like you have no problems with who you are.” Bellamy sighed and your eyes widened with the seriousness behind his eyes. While Bellamy could be plenty serious, never really around you. You two had fun together, that was your friendship, built on ease and calmness. You straightened your back, trying to show Bellamy you were listening more closely. “How do you do it?”
The question was no doubt tricky. You weren’t sure how you ‘did’ it, because it all honesty you had your insecurities and you didn’t even know you came off that confident. “Well, Bell, everybody has insecurities, even me.”
That seemed to do anything but help Bellamy as he sighed in frustration and pull at his hair. For the first time, Bellamy seemed near tears. Your mouth fell open, unsure of how to console your friend as this was the first time you’d ever seen him this upset.
Pondering for a moment, you stepped towards Bellamy, your hand reaching out to grab his wrists and pull them away from his face. “Hey,” you called softly, peering down so you could see his eyes. “Tell me. What’s wrong?”
“I don’t know how to describe it,” Bellamy confessed, letting you take his hands. He tried to think how to explain how he felt, but realized that this was the first time he’d ever really attempted at opening up to someone. He had many great friends but Bellamy was never one to go out and ask for help, he often bottled up his feelings until they passed. But this time, it seemed harder.
“I just see the way people, mainly girls, look at me. Eyeing me up and down like i’m nothing more than my body.” He sighed. “And it hurts, because I don’t want to just be known for how I look. I want to be known for other things, whatever that is.”
You didn’t respond right away, mainly because you didn’t know how to. You wanted to be there for Bellamy, and you would be, but this was the last thing you’d ever expect to see Bellamy struggling with. “I thought you’d know, mainly because you get the same looks but you don’t care.”
Moving your hands so they were holding his hands instead of his wrists, you linked your fingers together, gathering his attention. Bellamy let his eyes come off the ground to peer at you with hesitancy, you smiled reassuringly at him. “I do care.” You confessed, “it’s a difficult thing to know people how care for how you look and not… say, your personality.”
Bellamy bit his lips, you words relating to him more than you’d ever know.
You continued; “but listen, while I care, I don’t. I go out of my way to show people I am more than just my body, it’s difficult and frustrating, people can be dicks. But if I see someone judging my personality on how I look, I show them the true me with how I act.” You put evince on each word, wanting Bellamy to hear and understand what you were saying.
Stepping towards him, moving so you could stare more at him directly, you gave him a determined look. “Show them who you really are.” You advised, pressing a finger against his chest. “That’s all you can do.”
“How do you know they’ll listen?”
“I don’t,” you smiled. “If they don’t, you push them out of your life. You are more than just your body, Bellamy.”
You grinned, letting your hand fall on Bellamy’s chin. “I think you’re more than just your body. I always have.”
What do you think of the pairing "Dale Cooper x Audrey Horne"?
I’ve heard–and I’m not sure how true it is–that the show was originally written intending for Cooper/Audrey to be canon, but that Kyle MacLachlan refused to go along with it. I believe (again, just working off my shoddy memory here) that he argued that it was OOC–not to mention inappropriate–for a character like Coop to get romantically involved with Audrey who, despite acting older than her real age*, is still in high school.
If that story has any truth behind it, I’m very glad he did that and I agree with him 100%. It doesn’t fit the character at all. (Especially if you want to dig into some of the symbolism behind BOB, and how you can argue that he’s meant to represent the cycle of abuse and how it’s passed on from generation to generation–Leland was abused as a child and went on to abuse Laura–and Cooper getting possessed by BOB at the end of S2 is kind of a red flag implying that Coop is himself an abuse survivor. IIRC there’s some canon outside of the show–in My Life, My Tapes I think?–that backs this theory up as well. So the idea that he’d be cool with turning around and getting involved with an 18 year old girl is KINDA QUESTIONABLE.)
I mean, don’t get me wrong, I do still see a lot of chemistry between the actors involved, but…listen. This scene is everything to me. It’s so spot on. Audrey doesn’t need yet another older man hypersexualizing her and taking advantage of her when she’s vulnerable. What she needs is the one thing she, up until that moment in the story, didn’t have: a friend.
I love and adore Coop and Audrey as friends / one of the show’s many great brotps. That’s a healthy relationship for them both IMHO, not to mention great to watch. As a romantic pairing, though? Y’all gonna see me run screaming in the other direction as fast as I can.
* There’s also a discussion to be had about why Audrey acts like this, but I’ll just leave this here. And also this. It’s so, so obvious her femme fatale act is just there to protect herself. It’s not a power fantasy. Audrey is lonely and isolated and constantly sexualized by older men and she adopts the femme fatale persona because that way it’s easy to pretend she’s in control of the situation when, as storylines like the One Eyed Jack’s plot show, she is very much not.
Summary: Ben hated dancing. He hated it with everything inside him that could hate something that wasn’t actually hurting him. He hated how he looked when he danced, how people looked /at/ him when he danced, and most importantly, how he thought Beverly looked at him when he danced, did anything that might involve exposing his body.
So how had he gotten himself into a dance class in the Denbrough’s basement with Beverly Marsh?