one more pound to goal weight

This morning I stepped on the scales and they read 172#. I have never in my adult life weighed as little as one-hundred seventy-two pounds. At one point in time when I stepped on the scales they were closer to 300# than 200#. Hands down this is the most emotional & rewarding journey of my life. Every day is an improvement. I am constantly assessing and adjusting my goals. My training is tougher & more consistent than ever. My nutrition is on point & macros get readjusted as need be. I have a new set of goals and am ready to smash them.👊🏼

Two years ago today I stopped making excuses and started to make a change. I always hated how I looked. I wore shirts that were way too big to hide how much weight I had actually gained and I refused to swim or have my shirt off around anyone. A year ago today I was still trying to figure out what I was doing at the gym to get the results I wanted. Well a year later and about 25 pounds heavier I am feeling great with where I am at so far. My life has changed quite a lot in the last year and this is the one thing that has become even more consistent to get me through everything. I have made a lot of progress and some days it’s hard not making more, but I have a lot of goals for myself and I am working my fucking ass off to exceed them.



I did not feel like doing one of these today because my mirror selfie game has been strong this week and it felt unnecessary BUT today is actually kind of a big deal. 1: one year ago today I started lizzielosing (though at the time it was lizzieketo) and that is making me feel all kinds of things. 2: On January 1st (my “before” picture day) I was determined that this weight loss challenge was going to end today, after 3 months. I wrote all sorts of essays to myself about how 3 months wasn’t that long, I was going to hermit myself for winter and be all hot and sexy by Spring, yada yada. 3: I haven’t posted a sincere progress side by side in 3 weeks and a month just ended so here we are. I am adding bold text highlights to make this word-explosion appear more interesting.

I gained 2 pounds this week because I’ve been lazy, but since Jan 1st I’ve lost around 8-10 stubborn pounds and am still about 10 pounds away from one of my goal weights. (I fluctuate between 125 pounds and 127.) 2 inches have been lost from the waist and 2 from the hips. I’m actually pretty much halfway to all of my goals after 3 months. Obviously I wish I was 100% there and ready to maintain at 110-115 pounds, but if these months have taught me anything it’s that even with the best intentions I still screw up at least once a week and maybe that’s OK! Things are still changing in the right direction, and that matters. 

I feel like the first few weeks my body really dropped a lot of fat and my progress looks less and less noticeable each week because it’s more muscle toning+bone-revealing, but I feel generally hotter! The increasing frequency of selfies on this site is a testament to that. Those shorts are now baggy and sit below the belly button, which they’re not supposed to do and now do because they’re too big. My tits got smaller but they look better so it’s all good. Hips/saddlebags finally, slowly shrinking. I don’t know. Again, wish I was already there after 3 months but staying positive. I’m going to try and not drink at all this week because it truly is the only thing holding me back at this point. I’m not setting a new date for my goal weight just yet, but it took me 3 months to get here so realistically June-ish I should hit my goal weight…but we’ll see! Thanks for sticking with me, gang. (and today a special, loving shoutout to @alittlebitofketo and @ketokee both of whom I have now been interacting with for ONE YEAR TODAY and both of whom have made fucking outstanding progress in the last year and are a huge inspiration to me.)

Setting small goals towards a big goal!

One thing I learned in this process of getting healthy, fit, and losing weight is creating small goals that are working up towards a big goal. This week I have 2 small goals leading towards my big goal (losing 40 pounds) My 2 goals are:

1. Eating a salad for a meal every day

2. Workout everyday this week

Although they don’t sound that difficult, to some they are! But I think this is a great (small) goal because I will feel more accomplish and striving more to get to my bigger goal. I have cut out most gluten and dairy out of my foods (because of a sensitive stomach) but never been a huge salad fan…So I think it will be an awesome goal to achieve! 

Remember Ana

Just remember if you resist today, tomorrow you’ll wake up thinner.

Decide what it is that you want. Write that shit down. Make a fucking plan. And…… work on it! Every single day.

The difference between WANT and NEED is SELF CONTROL.

Ana is SKINNY, Ana has perfect skin, Ana has perfect hair, Ana has perfect nails, Ana has perfect taste in fashion, Ana has perfect grades, Ana is perfect in every sport, Ana is perfectly TINY and fragile, everybody likes Ana.
Be like Ana.

Imagine this:
Food is a demon. And like all demons it wants to get inside you and control you.
And then there is Ana. She is your best friend. She just wants to protect you.
Ana keeps the demons away. Listen to Ana, stay away from food.

Having no discipline is a way to failure. If you are not willing to control your actions to achieve your goals, you can’t expect to achieve success.

Just imagine..
Imagine running your hands over your flat tummy, feeling your hip bones and being happy.
Imagine pulling on a tight tshirt and not feeling self conscious about the way it clings.
Imagine being hugged and their arms going all the way round you as they lift you and remark on how light you are. Imagine being called beautiful no matter what you are wearing because you don’t have a round face or double chin anymore, your cheekbones look contoured without even trying, your collarbones only emphasise your slender neck and tiny shoulders. Imagine the shock in their eyes and their approval as they see how tiny you have become. Imagine being beautiful.

Just imagine it: waking up and seeing yourself skinny, thin and small, you’re finally your goal weight. Imagine how cute all the clothes you’ve wanted to wear for the longest time, finally look. Imagine people telling you how skinny you look, and how much they envy you. Imagine your boyfriend/girlfriend being able to pick you up effortlessly, saying you’re as light as a feather. Imagine how good it will feel, and good you will look. Just imagine.

Just look at yourself. You weak, pathetic excuse of a person. Wanting to be thin and perfect, yet stuffing your face with food? Just STOP IT NOW! Stop eating so much. Focus on not eating, and when you do eat make sure it is healthy and low in calories. Actually, you deserve so much better than you’re doing right now. You deserve to be perfect. Now, quit being a spineless person and fight for that perfect body. Or would you rather sit here stuffing your face with foods, eventually becoming even fatter? Choose your own path..

It takes 4 weeks for you to notice your body changing. 8 weeks for your friends to notice. And 12 weeks for the rest of the world to notice. KEEP GOING. 2 weeks to feel it, 4 weeks to see it, 8 weeks to hear it!

Stomach Growling?
Of course it’s not! That’s just the little workers in your body starting the chainsaw they are going to use to carve that fat off of your body ♡

You’re hungry?
Too bad. You’re too fat to eat. If you don’t starve you’ll never reach your goals. You’ll always be fat. Now drink some water. Don’t fuck this up fatty.

The best part about weight loss is feeling it, finally, after being uncomfortable for so long. It’s running your hands over your hip bones, feeling your collarbone and sharp shoulders, the space between you and your clothing when you move. It’s sitting down without your stomach bulging. It’s walking without your thighs slamming together. It’s placing your hand to the side of your face and feeling that delicate cheekbone in your palm. Looking thin is great, but feeling thin is amazing.

Questions Before Eating:
1. Am I going to be happy with myself after I eat this? 
2. Is this food what I planned on eating today?
3. Do I need a distraction right now to resist this temptation?

This girl doesn’t need to hide her belly when she sits down… this girl doesn’t have to be afraid someone could call her fat…this girl never has to think about hiding her belly while making love to her boyfriend….this girl never has problems to find new clothes because everything will fit…. this girl doesn’t have to feel bad standing next to other girls because she is always the skinniest….

Feet together, legs apart,
Collarbones that look like art,
People stare in admiration,
After a month of starvation,
Hips sharp as stones,
Their fingers tracing your bones,
Not a single flaw on your skin
Finding happiness in the form of thin.

Hey Fatty … yes you…you with your chubby red cheeks! …. look at all the girls in the thinspo … this is how you want to look right? yes you do! So why do you even still THINK about food???!! It won’t bring you any closer to your goal weight!!! Food is your enemy which you have to keep out of your mouth…out of your Body….out of your mind …out of your fridge!!!! Your desire to be skinny is so much stronger than your hunger!!! So don’t be ridiculous little fatty…you don’t need this food.

Can you see the floor past your stomach? or is your stomach too bloated. Can you fit those strappy heels around your ankles? Or are they too fat. Can you see your ribs? Or do you have to suck in. Can you fit into number 2 jeans? Or size xxs? Can you wear a choker without actually feeling choked? Can you wear low rise jeans without your muffin top showing? Can you sit up without your stomach spilling over your upper thighs? Can you wear a crop top without feeling embarrassed? DON’T EAT.

Anti binge
Remember how you look naked
Remember how your thighs touch
Remember how you look at others
Remember how your stomach looks
Remember how unhappy you are
Remember how we are always here
Remember how your friends look
Remember how you envy them
Remember how ashamed you are
Remember how long it took
Remember how you felt last time
Remember how it’s not worth it
Remember how you tell your lies
Remember how you want to change
Remember how your body looks
Remember how people see fat
Imagine YOU when its done
Remember how far you have come!

with every meal I skip…
…i can feel my stomach shrinking.
…i can feel my body digesting fat. 
…i can feel my eyes sinking. 
…i can feel my cheeks hollowing. 
…i feel one step closer to my next goal weight. 
…i feel like i’m worth something. 
…i feel like i can do this. 
…i feel less hungry come the next meal.
…i feel a little prettier than i was before. 
…i feel a little thinner than i was before. 
…i feel a little stronger than i was before. 
…i gain more self-confidence. 
…it is easier to imagine the pounds slipping away. 
…it is easier to skip another meal later. 
…i love myself a little more. 
…i want to starve more.
…i want to restrict more. 
…i want to lose more.
but most of all…
…i want to skip the next meal…

Ketosis flu
I’m currently experiencing the dreaded ketosis flu. I’ve been looking at pro ana for almost a year now, and I’ve never seen this mentioned so I will give a brief explanation due to what I’ve learned today. Trust me, you’ll need to know about this if you’re restricting calories.
Ketosis flu is the side effects of your body producing ketones. Basically, our bodies normally burn glucose but when you start a low carb/calorie restricting diet, your body starts producing ketones instead meaning you burn fat instead of glucose.
I know what you’re thinking, yes! Fat burning! And you’re right, it’s great, but the transition of your body going from burning glucose to burning fat can give you ketosis flu.
What are the symptoms?
-feeling faint
-high heart rate
-‘fruiting’ smelling breath (due to acetone from ketones)
-extreme fatigue
Sound familiar? The first thing you want to do during this is eat some carbs. And sure, it might make you feel better, but this is giving up.
To get over ketosis flu without giving up and going back to burning glucose, you should drink PLENTY of water and eat really salty and *drumroll* fatty foods! This will speed up the transition and you will get over the ketosis flu anywhere from 2 days to a week depending on your body. The last thing you want to do is give up because once you get over the flu, your energy returns to normal AND you’ll be a fat burning machine!
Stay strong angels x

I know
I know what I’m doing to my body is wrong. That if I really want to lose weight, I should be healthy about it. I know that I shouldn’t put this stress on my body but I can’t stop. I don’t want to stop because in my mind how thin I am, how low the number on that scale is equals how high my self esteem is and how good I look. To someone that can’t control how the world is around them is, controlling how they look and what they eat is everything.
Please understand.

How to convince people you aren’t getting worse:
•only eat around people!!!
•cut up food into tiny pieces to make it seem like you’ve eaten more
•eat five bites of a meal if you have to eat, no more, no less

First goal weight!

Okay, so I’ve hit my first goal weight of 156. That’s 20 pounds gone in a month and a half! I tripped up a bit when I went out with my friend who loves food, but I managed to get it under control and I’m so proud of that! Guys, I promise the feeling of hitting your goal weights one at a time and SEEING results is so much more satisfying than fatty potato chips or cake. Please stay strong you guys!

anonymous asked:

I am interested in what diet plan you are currently following.

I’m going to start following my 900 calorie diet plan tomorrow. Here’s the plan:

Starting a new diet
I’m calling it the 900 calorie diet. Real creative. I’m doing it to quickly lose weight before school starts because time is running out. If you wanna do it with me, message me and we can motivate each other.
-Thou shall not exceed no more than 950 calories daily
-Thou shall exercise at least three times a week
-Exercise will NOT be included in the calorie count. Calories burned does not = more calories consumed
-Thou shall not slip up or stop this diet until school has started
-If thou loses their “900 calorie goal weight loss” (mine is 20 pounds for this diet), one is able to purchase a few cute pieces of clothing for school
-Thou shall not stop this diet until 900 calorie goal weight loss is achieved
-Thinspo is your friend. Thou must reblog thinspo daily for motivation purposes, and for inspiration not to slip up or binge
-Thou must post their progress on here, and post what they ate in a day, to make sure people know if you had more calories than you’re allowed (exceeding 950)
-Thou must drink water religiously
-Thou must drink two tablespoons of apple cider vinegar mixed with eight ounces of water each meal
-Thou must not eat past 10:00 PM
-Thou must attempt to have last meal at 8 PM
-Thou must stay consistent and will be skinny. You can do this
*disclaimer* pls don’t delete: I am not a nutritionist in any way shape or form. Eating less than 2000 calories a day can be damaging and may cause health problems. I am not recommending this diet to anyone. This is something for me personally, and everyone will be responsible for their own actions. Thank you.

anonymous asked:

After eating/stuffing, do you think Ben would set a goal for himself in terms of how much he could lift while weight training at the gym with Kevin? How much weight exactly would be the heaviest he could lift as his muscles get bigger? Would he try to compete with Kevin and maybe Rook too? (It would be awesome if you could reply in rp but I'd not it's okay reply anyway you like~)

I’m going to answer this one normally because I already have a similar one to it (though might give away some of the answer) that’s more in the form of an RP type question already in my inbox. That one I’ll answer a little later. 

Oh I totally believe that Ben would set a training goal of how much he could lift. (regardless of him eating but probably DEFINITELY helps) Note to self: someday try to finish stuffing/muscle gain story that I never finished. Except it’s probably terrible now. I think Ben would really try his best to get up to Kevin, who probably could lift more than him at the start. He’d probably try to go for something like 235 pounds as a goal and then see how he went from there as he got older and trained more. (Out of high school probably train to much higher weights.) 

Currently Kevin can probably max out at a higher weight but he’s been training longer. I do think that Ben is a little different though, in though he doesn’t lift quite as much, he’s got A LOT more stamina. So while he may get to 235-255 pounds for a bench press, he probably can do it for 3 sets of 8 instead of a one rep max. He’d also be capable of doing a serious amounts of pushups compared to Kevin. (That’s probably the same for squats and pullups and such). 

As for competing with Kevin and Rook, oh yes totally. I totally see Ben and Kevin as workout buddies, especially in the beginning, where Kevin would help him around the weight room and they would spot each other. Kevin would probably tease Ben a lot about being weak but I think he’d honestly respect Ben in the weight room once Ben dived in seriously. Especially because I think Ben would really focus on it and then improve rapidly. (which would be fun because Ben would probably get a lot of beginner gains in the gym) 

I think that Ben and Kevin would pal around in the gym but still have a good time, and both tease and hype each other, and drive each other to go longer or with heavier weight. (I just hope that they both watch each other and keep each other in line with form because most people are TERRIBLE with form). Rook might be harder just because I don’t know how his species would be and I am curious if they would ever even have a gym. I think Ben and Kevin paling around might convince Rook to try it, and then both of them would show Rook the ropes but probably have much less weight though I could see Rook doing better in a sparring match. 

(though yes I could see Ben end up having a fairly ripped body once he’s at the gym that doesn’t get shown off that much, sorta like these)

Just a reminder that weight loss isn’t a straight slope…

This is 2.5 years in the making. There have been bumps in the road. There will continue to be bumps in the road. I need to accept that; we all do. Our journeys are not easy.

Today was a hard day. I got a DXA body composition scan at DexaFit Minneapolis (I do almost every month) and I was expecting great results. I. BUSTED. MY. ASS. this month; do lunges every day, go for a long walk every day, resistance bands every day, I’ve been eating cleaner than ever, etc. Stepped on the scale to see I lost 3 pounds so I was feeling encouraged! … But then the scan tells me what that 3 pound loss was…

In one month… I lost nearly 6 pounds of muscle and gained 2 pounds of fat. So while my weight went down, my body fat percentage went up over 2% this month. These machines don’t lie.

How the fuck did this happen? Was I eating too many calories? Did I not eat enough protein? Do I need less cardio? More weight training? How can I focus on ALL OF THESE THINGS while not obsessing over every single bit of it? How do I reach my goals while living a normal happy life?

I don’t know. I don’t fucking know. I’m feeling horrible today. I’m frustrated, humiliated, frankly baffled, and majorly fearing the future… But I’ve come a long way. I’m not 170 pounds anymore. I need to meditate on that.

I’m not better than I was last month, but I’m better than I was 2 years ago… and that’s amazing.

Just another bump in the road…

Ex-Jock: Epilogue

Click here for chapters 1-4

The second I agreed to get fatter with Justin, he created a gainer profile for me on all social media and mapped out a history of my weight gain. I knew I had gained around 35 pounds when I was living with Austin, but after I moved out my fat ass hadn’t once stepped on a scale. We discovered that between the time I moved out of Austin’s and when Justin and I became official, I had gained a little over 20 pounds. This was the first moment in my life when I took a step back and realized, “wow, I’ve gained over 50 pounds. I’m fat.” I could grab two meaty handfuls of belly fat. Even my butt was soft and dimpled now.  

It wasn’t long before I had before and after photos of my gain posted, alongside videos of Justin shaking and slapping my gut online. I was shocked by how many followers I accrued in a short amount of time. I never had people admire my body to such a high degree, and I must admit- it was addicting.

Within three months of Justin introducing me to Grommr, I had gained 30 pounds. Realizing you’re fat is one thing, but with all that new weight on me I felt positively massive. My love handles bounced with every step, and threatened to make an appearance every time I moved my body. Stretch marks ran up and down my thighs which rubbed holes in all my underwear. Large shirts now clung to the fat rolls filling my lap. My stomach was getting in the way of just about everything. Lifting crates at work had become harder, bus seats were a struggle, and restaurant booths were starting to become my enemy.  I documented all of this online, and my followers were salivating at their keyboards.

At first, my newfound flab was doing wonders for mine and Justin’s sex life. We would stuff each other silly before fucking, sometimes even incorporating food in the bedroom. Justin had gained some weight too, but I was the one that was really blowing up. We were both getting so fat that lovemaking became a logistical puzzle, often requiring me to lift my stomach to allow easy access to my cock.

Unfortunately, once I got plump enough for Justin’s taste, he turned his attention to a new muscled stud who was packing on the pounds. We had an open relationship, but Justin’s infatuation with this other man eventually drove us apart. Of course, I was upset about the break up. Although I did take it as an opportunity to comfort eat to my belly’s desire. Furthermore, I still had an internet presence. I had made friendships with many guys online, and frankly there was no shortage of chubby chasing men who wanted a taste of me in Seattle.  

Working at the brewery became increasingly awkward after the break up, and eventually I found a new job at a grocery store. It paid well, but I was on my feet a lot. This was killer now that I was hefting almost 100 pounds of extra blubber around. However, the benefit of discount groceries was certainly good for my waistline.

I felt confident in my chubby body even after breaking up with Justin, and I didn’t want to give up on my newfound curves or fame. As I grew, so did my online following, and for a while this provided enough encouragement for me to forge ahead with getting fatter. I continued to hit the gym as well, and was becoming positively massive. I’d waddle from machine to machine with a crescent of underbelly wobbling out of the bottom of my shirt. I reveled in the stares I received from the fit and lean gym goers. I even had a couple of the employees suggest I try cardio once in awhile. I would always politely inform them: “I love food so much there’s no hope I’ll ever lose this belly.”

Eventually my weight did plateau. I had finally reached the point that I was almost always the “fat guy” in the room. I still wanted more, though. For two months my weight never fluctuated more than a few pounds. One day, I discovered a documentary about gaining on TV. I quickly opened my laptop to do some research and found something truly fantastic. Two gainers in Italy, Grasello and Nicoli, were opening their countryside estate to the public in an effort to start a literal “Fat Farm.” Admission was dependent upon an application which required a written weight gain history, future goals, and links to your social media presence. The Fat Farm guaranteed you would meet or exceed your goal weight or your money back. Plus, you got to lounge in a beautiful Italian mansion and eat gourmet food prepared by a chef whenever you wanted. It seemed like a gainer’s fantasy come to life, and it wasn’t that expensive. I immediately began filling out an application.


Not sure if I like my first week spread. Not enough room in the daily squares, too much space elsewhere. Definitely going to change it up for next week.

I’m keeping a very rough track of my calorie intake daily with the pink bar, and slightly more accurate water intake with the aqua bar.

Somewhat ashamed of putting my weight out there, but I don’t FEEL like I weigh that much despite what the scale says. I don’t feel like I look as overweight as the numbers say.

However, I’m pretty proud of my weight loss tracking page! So many I see have steps by the pound, but since weight fluctuates so much day to day I didn’t think that was fair. Once I consistently reach a 5 pound goal, I’ll count it successful and note the date.

I do LOVE this new notebook though. I liked the pocket-able size of my moleskine cahier book, but the ability to spread out in this one is much more comfortable. It feels much less cramped.

Progress report !

After posting the initial picture of me, sharing my stats and more pictures feels a lot easier. I think I just needed to get over the hurdle.

So my heaviest recorded weight in April 2014 was 354 pounds.

I lost about 40 pounds and was able to keep it off for a while but in late 2016 I started gaining it back

In January 2017 I joined weight watchers and started the bariatric surgery program with a starting weight of 326 lbs.

On June 8th, 2017 ( day of surgery) I weighed in at 296 lbs

Today, one month post op, I weight 276 lbs.

My goal is to be under 180!

Not pregnant, but that’s okay. Would have been a bad due date month anyway lol

Small victory,.,I saw an “8” on the scale for the first time since we came back from Costa Rica like 3 years ago and I sweat off 9 pounds in one week cause it was so damn hot plus the food was gross lol. 189.6 but hey, it counts! I’m even more motivated to continue with this way of eating and see the scale go down down down until I reach my goal, probably like 150 pounds? We shall see. But I’m more than halfway to reaching my New Years resolution goal of losing 20 pounds this year!

Today was my first pool day and it was lovely. I made my schedule so that I have 3 afternoons off to go to the pool by myself and read 😍 I got terrible sunburn though, whoops. I think tomorrow I may go to the library instead, I need new books and I also need to stay out of the sun lol

I finished a great book today, “The Girl Before.” By JP Delaney. Psychological thriller, very well written. This is my 43rd book this year, yay! 7 more until I reach my New Years resolution goal, but I think I’m upping that to 100 to really challenge myself.

So yeah. That is all, I believe lol

Unsolicited Advice

Although I am not “active” on Tumblr anymore - I watch you all soar, transform, and triumph. I check in daily. I may be a silent observer, but I see you, I applaud you, I admire you.

Nearing three years post op Roux-en-Y Gastric Bypass, I am old news. A broken record of disordered eating and exercise addiction. Stagnant. A participant of non-consensual maintenance. I don’t feel like I have much to contribute.

Tonight, like most nights, I’m awake. Staring at my ceiling. Ruminating thoughts fighting slumber.

This is on my mind:

Looking back on the past three years, my biggest weight loss surgery mistake, my deepest regret is the emphasis I placed on the "honeymoon period.” The notion that the bulk of my success would only be achieved in the first 12-18 months following surgery put me on mission with a vengeance. All or nothing. Tunnel vision. No room for living. No room for moderation. I followed my diet to a T. I exercised consistently. I put all of my effort and passion into winning this race. My hobbies fell to the wayside. I lost myself. I sacrificed everything, but I never reached that illusive goal weight. I was a mere six pounds shy. I never recovered and I’m left with an internal clock that is wound too tight. Constantly ticking. A driving force of anxiety.

Sometimes I weigh 184 pounds, sometimes I weigh 200. Regardless of where I fall on the spectrum my body fat percentage is in the normal range, my resting heart rate is classified “Athlete” and I have the most goddamn beautiful quads. This should be the validation I need to consider myself a success, but it’s not. When I reflect on my journey as a whole I don’t exclaim “I lost 179 pounds!” Instead my mind says “Why can’t you lose those last 14-30 pounds?”    

Using beratement as motivation is a dangerous, dangerous thing. This tactic was ultimately more destructive than the prior habits that initiated my weight loss journey. You may reach the numeric and physical goals you set for yourself, but you run the risk of never feeling satisfied. Your success will never be enough.      

I am a firm believer in “You Do You,” but sometimes I slip and fall prey to human nature and assert my opinions where they don’t belong. This is one of those times. 

So here it is. I am unapologetically giving you my unsolicited advice:

Be kind to yourself. Be gentle. For every ounce of pressure you put on yourself to succeed, double those efforts to love yourself. You are kind. You are worthy. Show yourself the grace and compassion you extend to others.

4. Captive Heart, Captive Mind

(Bucky X Reader)

Summary: Reader had been imprisoned for over five years and cut off from her powers for most of that time. She is ready to give up when she is given one more mission by the mysterious group she has been captured by.

Author’s Note: This is so painfully slow, even for me and I know what’s going to happen. So many things are planned for this series. I know I said it would be 15-20 parts, but there are more than that planned right now and I’m kinda nervous! thank you guys so much for all of your feedback- it is always greatly appreciated!

Warnings: TW Rape/Sexual Assault history and anguish. Cursing, mental breakdowns. Slight nudity- don’t get your hopes up you heathens.


TAGS:  @iwillendyourlifeslut @sergeant-angel @thesalsafic @bxtchybrie @beccaanne814-blog @hellomissmabel @kaatniss @oliviaadamswrites @finallybreathee @marvel-lucy @chrixa


“FRIDAY says you’re cleared and ready for training kiddo.”

I throw my arms around Tony’s neck and after a moment of hesitation, he puts his arms around me in return. I laugh through my tears into his ear, “Thank you so much Tony. I couldn’t have done this without you.”

He blushes and pats my head after setting me down, “When you get ready go find Steve and Natasha, they’ll show your real room.”

He leaves with a smile on his face. I know he isn’t used to someone looking up to him so much, but I can’t help it. He’s told me so much about himself and told me so many stories. For the past month I have been stuck in this room doing nothing but eating, physical therapy, and a couple rounds of failed mental therapy. Tony and FRIDAY had set up a program for me, maximizing weight gain and learning how to use my muscles again. I wasn’t paralyzed, but I hadn’t had any physical training in over four years. Before I had been taken in and tricked by Lotus, I had weighed 125 pounds, and through training I became 152 pounds of solid muscle. As I deteriorated in my prison, I shed weight constantly. When they rescued my I weighed 93 pounds. I hadn’t noticed my appearance when I was imprisoned because…. I couldn’t look in the mirror or touch my food sometimes after what they had done to me.

Keep reading

Here is my latest progress picture! There are 3 years between these photos. I am 5'8" and I’ve lost 65 pounds from the photo on the left (215 - 150). 150 was my goal weight but now I’m seeing 140 as where I’d like to be before starting to lift heavy weights. ☺️

I do intermittent fasting, lots of walking, and a fair amount of long distance running. I largely use CICO (It really works). I don’t restrict anything from my diet and I try to have one treat meal per week. I’m still trying to work on eating more protein and forgiving myself for my slip ups.

So I was going through my facebook pictures because I was thinking of adding the boy I have a 😍crush😍 on as a friend and I came across this picture on the left.

In the left picture I was going to see Sex And The City 2 with my bestie and we dressed up because, hi have you met us? I was 20, maybe 21, when this was taken and I was probably close to my highest weight, maybe around 330-340.

The picture on the right was from New Years Eve, about 4-5 years has passed, I’m around 100-110lbs lighter and 100,000% happier. It’s not the best picture but it’s angled like other picture and with another friend so I chose that one to showcase.

There are days I can’t believe this is happening; I’m losing weight, living a healthier life style, enjoying exercise and learning to be happy. I used to dream at night I would wake up and be 100lbs lighter and now I wake up every day 138lbs away from my highest weight. I can run up stairs, I can chase my niece and nephew, I can lift boxes and fit comfortably in opera house seats. This picture motivates me to loose goal of 50 more pounds because if I’m this happy 75% of the way there, I can’t imagine how much my life will change, how much I will change when my goal is 100% met.

Losing weight in college can be so difficult. I’m trying to do it and between my busy schedule and the horrible caf food its been hard but I’m pushing through it and trying to find ways around the obstacles. 

For those of you who are trying to stay healthy or lose weight on a college meal plan here are some small changes that made a big difference for me:

1. Eat a salad with every meal (preferably with a non-creamy dressing)

2. Drink more water.

3. Keep healthy snacks with you to eat between meals

4. Use skim milk in coffee instead of creamer or half-and-half

5. Get some rest!!!!!

6. Eat more lean protein

7. Start exercising regularly. Even if its only 15 minutes get up and move!

8. Think positively

Try making one or two small changes every week. Pretty soon they’ll add up.

My goal is to lose 15 pounds by the end of the semester. Stick around for more tips :)



the-mess-is-magic submitted: 

 60 pound weight loss. Took one year of discipline, dedication to my goal, lots of cardio, clean eating, and a little pixie dust!
the-mess-is-magic 💪💪 5'4 180 down to 120-130

Get Motivated with more Before and After weight loss pictures  or  SUBMIT