The Hobbit: Battle of the Five Armies CRACK (everyone is at some point Beyoncé) 

i like to pride myself with being the sort of person who never regrets anything until it’s too late

inexperienced; hanbin |m|

Originally posted by ohitsdoubleb

Originally posted by chocolatechanu

Word count - 6024
Summary - Hanbin is new at school. He’s shy with girls and you have a lot to teach him.

//GIFS aren’t mine// And this is also kinda shit which i am really sorry about


He was definitely new, you could tell from the way he seemed to aimlessly wander the corridors looking for nothing in particular. His feet carried him in every direction, his head turning this way and that looking for the class he was supposed to be in, finally stumbling upon his desired classroom almost 10 minutes late. You had history and maths together and every maths lesson he looks like a rabbit caught in headlights, eventually choosing to stare longingly out of the window and at the surrounding buildings, lost somewhere much more pleasant than the droning voice of the teacher.

No, as it happens, you don’t make a habit of watching all of the new people in a way that couldn’t be described as anything less than creepy, it’s just that he’s… different. He’s extremely good-looking, completely beyond compare to anyone else here; he doesn’t seem to be all that focused on doing well in the classes that you have together and he’s so shy. In the time that he’s been at school, you’ve never seen him talk to anyone, he just sits in the back, never answering a question or even making smart remarks like some do.

Time and time again, girls particularly, have tried to befriend him, talking and giggling in their nasal voices but he always does the same thing: shakes his head furiously and pushes past them, trying to get as far away from them as possible. Even weirder, you’ve looked for him everywhere at lunch but it’s like he just disappears then magically reappears for the next class he has.

One thing that you think about a lot is his lips. Oh goodness, the things you can imagine his lips doing, teasingly working down your stomach, his fingers brushing your hips as he drag your panties down your legs, his full lips never leaving your skin. However, you highly doubt he has even seen a girl without her top off in person, let alone would he know what to do when it came to anything sexual.

Keep reading

make me choose

corazson asked: hancock or robin?

anonymous asked:


I’M SO SORRY I promise this is the last one!! I also had requests for Yoda as Nick Fury which works too, I just couldn’t pass over the perfect opportunity to do a triple-combo Samuel L Jackson meme because of reasons XD

i’m sorry these just keep getting more and more sketchy and ridiculous


this was requested by @natesbeat, so here you go.

  • never wears matching socks. Like, even when it’s actually more convenient to grab socks that match, he won’t. “It’s a point of pride now”, he’ll say, with a shrug.
  • he loves Sour Patch Kids. So much. Whenever Jack’s there while a convenience store is being robbed, she always grabs Ray some Sour Patch Kids
  • half the time he’s on his DS (which is all the damn time) he’s not even really doing anything, he’s just found that it’s advantageous to him to have people think he’s not listening to conversations
  • he’s just a giant fucking cat, seriously. Lounges around on the couches all the time, and if you’re on one of them you’d better expect to have a small Puerto Rican draped halfway over you because that’s what will happen
  • he’s cold all the time, and never goes anywhere without a jacket on his shoulders, even during the hottest parts of the summer (although, when it’s above 90 degrees he’s been known to take his jacket off while outside, but he still takes one everywhere)
  • declares himself to be an open book (“I’m Puerto Rican, man, we’re not all that complicated”) but everything he does, from choosing not to drink to his carefully cultivated appearance of apathy, is a guard. And it doesn’t work, not really, not in this Crew, but it doesn’t mean he can’t try, and it’s not the way Ryan does it, keeping everything out until one day they just know him, all of him, because Ray, for as long as he could, only showed the parts of himself that he explicitly allowed to be shared.
  • He’s the best sniper they’ve got, the best Los Santos has got, but the kid’s wicked with a butterfly knife, too. He never uses one if he can help it, but he never quite loses the skill either.
  • he’s the first one to complain and run away at any sign of Crew Game Night (unless it’s video games, in which case “prepare to be slaughtered”). He usually hides on the roof.
  • There isn’t a person on Earth with any money at all that eats worse than Ray Narvaez Jr. It amazes Gavin, impresses Michael, and both confuses and terrifies Ryan. Besides special occasions like Christmas or birthdays, not one Crew member can recall him eating a vegetable. He thinks it’s hilarious, especially because he’s still the smallest member of the Crew
  • Gavin and him are no longer allowed on missions together alone. Michael and Gavin are more dangerous, but Ray is easily bored and Gavin has no impulse control, meaning half the time they don’t do anything they’re supposed to and usually go for ice cream and mayhem instead
  • steals Ryan’s face paint all the time. Usually ends up making butterflies on his face or painting dicks and various renditions of “420 Blaze” on Gavin’s wall.
  • he’s pretty bad about showing genuine affection for people- he jokes with them and knows them really well, but it’s hard for him to show that he loves them sometimes. Which they know, and understand, and so the times when he does (through gifts or little smiles or a pat on the back) are special to the whole Crew. 
  • Geoff once walked in on him watching The Real Housewives of Orange County and the look on both of their faces is not one easy to forget. Ray couldn’t look him in the eyes for a week, and made him swear on his life not to tell anyone about this ever please Geoff I’m ruined especially don’t tell Gavin and Michael or I’ll never leave my room again
  • He loves Aladdin and absolutely despises Snow White.
  • he hates lobster, a lot. They think he might be afraid of it. None of them are sure. None of them really want to ask.
  • becomes the biggest pissbaby in the world when he’s sick. Everyone (Ryan) is forced to take care of him, and he needs like seven layers on and chicken noodle soup at all times. Jack usually babysits him when others (Ryan) can’t, and she, unlike others (Ryan), is much more willing to do it.
  • when he trips on something, usually he just does a somersault on the ground, exclaims “parkour”, and keeps moving like that was his plan all along
  • he never gets homesick, exactly; he grew up in a one-room apartment with a single mother who worked two jobs. But he misses some of those days: the ones where his mom wouldn’t work and they’d build a fort and stay in it all day, where he’d visit his abuela and she’d cook him all kinds of food. Those days, he gets pretty quiet, stays mostly in his room until someone (Jack or Michael, usually) gets through to him.  
  • he’s the last person in the world you’d expect to know anything about sports (he doesn’t give a shit about football and thought Jack was kidding when she told him that yes, lacrosse is real), and yet he’s oddly passionate about the University of New Mexico’s women’s volleyball team.
  • He has every line of The Bee Movie  memorized. Every. Damn. Line. 

Jack     Christmas