on the other hand i am forever alone

[LYRICS] VIXX LR - Today

For a moment, I go back to the day I first met you
And feel you
I empty out all the excitement and memories
Forget you, I have to erase it all

I have to erase it all ye ye
I have to keep pushing you
Out of my mind ye ye
Your expressions and the temperature of your hands
Your hugs and perfume
And delete the pictures and the numbers
Of everyone around you on my phone
I have to cram myself into the places
Where you were in my heart
I have to keep occupying myself with other things

Now I’m alone
Why am I deceived by love again
Did I believe it would be forever

Today Today
I have to get over the us of yesterday
And just think of the me of today
I love myself

There’s no answer to love
So there can’t be an answer to breakups ye
I was blind then
Without fear Why did I fall in the delusion
That we’d be together forever
Why did I have to suffer this pain
I tried to immerse myself in work, but I can’t work
I thought I might meet my friends for once in a long time
But I don’t go out
Time heals all, but I’m impatient
I fall asleep, but you’re in my dream

Now I’m alone
Why does love cool down right away
Did I forget that it will disappear

Today Today
I have to get over the us of yesterday
And just think of the me of today
I love myself

Uh myself
Uh I love myself
Uh myself
Uh I love myself

I say it’s the last, the last
But I’m afraid that
If I leave you, I’ll be left sad
Waiting for someone else

Today Today
I have to forget the me next to you
And just think of the me just of me
I love myself

Uh myself
Uh I love myself
Uh myself
Uh I love myself

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You’re Mine- Theo Raeken

@danimartinez29
Hi love your blog can you write me a imagine of theo reeked please. Like a jealous smut where he gets jealous and tell you that your his thanks


Attempting to close your locker with a large pile of books in your arms was quite a challenge. You leaned towards your locker door from different angles, trying to keep things inside your locker, whilst also trying to keep your books in your arms. 

You leaned side ways, letting go slightly of the pile to push the locker door closed, and failed miserably- successful only in closing the door, but your books fell, scattered on the floor around you.

“Are you fucking serious?” You cursed under your breath, bending over to gather your books and papers that had flown out of them.

While you were crouched down, you noticed a pair of feet, dressed in converse standing in front of you, and the body attached to them crouched down with you.

“Need a hand?” you looked up to see Liam Dunbar, one of the guys in Scott’s group.

“It’s ok, you don’t need to do that-“ you replied, before being cut off.

“It’s fine, I want to help.” You looked up at Liam, a gentle smile spread across his face. He handed you a pile of paper that he had saved from the trampling of your peers’ feet.

Attempting to stand up, books in hand, Liam offered you his hand. You slid your hand in his as he lifted you off the ground.

“Thank you.” you smiled at Liam. “All these books and papers are a bitch.” you both laughed.

“It’s no problem… Why do you have so many, anyway? What do you even have now?” he asked.

“I actually have a free period- I was just going to go to the library to study with Theo.” you stated, looking slightly embarrassed. “You must think I’m a nerd, huh?” you giggled.

Liam laughed. “Not at all.” He eyed the books in your arms and extended his own to take them from you. “Here, let me carry them for you.”

“Oh, don’t be silly.” you said, before having the books snatched from your grasp.

“Seriously, it’s fine. I’ll walk you to the library?” he asked.

You bit your lip, stunned by the gesture, but nodded with a smile. “Thanks, Liam.” you both began to walk.

Liam gripped the pile tightly in his hands. “So, what’s the deal with you and Raeken anyway? You guys going out, or-“

“No- we’re just hanging out.” you quickly answered.

“Oh, alright.” Liam answered.

You and Theo had been hanging out with each other quite regularly, in the woods, at your place… in his car… Yes, you had slept with him once before, but that was before you had become such good friends. It had probably been months ago.

Did you have feelings for him? No… well at least that’s what you told yourself when you were with him, not wanting to get hurt by the rejection.

You reached the library and walked through the doors, spotting Theo waving enthusiastically at you, but then suddenly stopping, and the smile on his face vanished.

You turned around and noticed that Liam had just followed you through the door.

He walked with you to Theo’s table and placed your books next to his. “There you go.” Liam said with a smile.

“Thanks again Liam.” you sat down. “You wanna sit with us?”

“Oh, I can’t, I have Chemistry, but thanks. I’ll see you around, yeah?” Liam smiled at you hopefully.

“You seriously came all the way here with my books when you’re late for class?” you asked in shock.

“Yeah.” Liam laughed shyly. “So I’ll see you around?” he repeated.

“Uh- yeah! Yeah of course!” you answered, causing Liam to smile and turn around, walking out of the library.

“Hey!” you smiled excitedly at Theo, who smiled back at you weakly.

“What’s with Liam, huh?” he asked, obviously pissed off for some reason.

“He just helped me when I dropped my books.” you answered, opening your History textbook.

“And brought them all the way here for you?” Theo raised an eyebrow.

“He offered and wouldn’t take no for an answer.” you laughed.

Theo looked down silently and your laugh faded.

“Theo, are you ok? Is something wrong?” you asked, reaching over and placing your hand on his.

Theo looked up at your hand as soon as it made contact with his. He said nothing, and then moved his hand to hold yours properly, intertwining his fingers with yours.

You accepted that Theo wouldn’t say anything and returned your eyes to the book in front of you.

Theo didn’t usually like talking when he was upset, so you didn’t want to push him any further… but you felt an ache inside of you from not knowing what was bothering him. All you wanted was to help.

The part of you that felt for him… very strongly- instinctively wanted to care for him and ensure he was happy at all times. You hadn’t seen him upset when you had hung out before, only from something that had happened before you got there, but he always returned to a better mood when you were around.

“I missed you.” Theo said quietly, still looking down.

Your eyes shot up at him when the words escaped his lips. You thought for a moment, examining the expression in his face, which was weak. He looked almost defeated. “I missed you too, Theo.” You said to him, reassuringly.

His eyes looked up and met yours, staring into them for a few moments, before he shut his book. “I don’t feel like studying anymore,” he said. “Let’s get out of here.”

Before you could reply to him, he stood up, his hand still attached to yours, pulling you along with him.

You walked out of the library, leaving your books on the table, and his too. Theo took you out of the school and into his car, detaching from your hand as he let you sit down and he started the car.

As Theo drove, his hand found its way back to yours, holding it as if you would slip away from him, and stroking it with his thumb. You looked down, staring at the contact and then looked up at Theo.

What was this? Theo had always loved spending time with you, but he had never seemed so… attached to you.

The car then came to a gradual halt in the middle of the woods, where you had always come to hang out.

Theo’s stare moved from the front of the car, to you. His eyes were glistening and his face still exposed a weakness.

“Why Liam, y/n?” he said. “Why him?”

“What do you mean?” you asked, confused.

Theo suddenly squeezed your hand. “Do you like him?” he stared hard into your eyes.

“No- Theo, he’s a nice guy and he offered to help me, that’s it!” you said.

“Good.” Theo said harshly, looking away.

You raised an eyebrow. Theo had never been like this with you. “What does it matter if I like him anyway…” you asked quietly.

Theo’s head shot back at you. “What does it matter?” he spat. He let go of your hand and exited the car, leaning on it instead.

You followed him out and stood behind him. “Theo!”

Theo didn’t budge. His head was lowered and his back was bent over, leaning on the roof of the car.

“Theo-“ you repeated softly, sliding your hands around his waist, holding him from behind.

You could feel the tension in his body relax in your arms. “You’re mine.” you heard leave Theo’s lips in a whisper.

You furrowed your eyebrows and opened your mouth to speak. “I’m what?

Theo turned to face you, straightening his back and pulling you in from the waist. “You’re mine.” he repeated. His grip on your waist tightened and you looked into Theo’s eyes in confusion.

“How am I yours?” you asked.

“You just are.” he answered. “Stay away from Liam.”

“I can’t, he’s in some of my classes. He goes to our school…” you said. “He’s sort of my friend.”

“Your friend?” he laughed. “Friends don’t want to fuck each other, y/n.”

“Well we fucked, didn’t we?” you cocked your head to the side.

Theo clenched his jaw, his body tensed. “That was before.”

“Well what about now? If I’m yours then what does that mean for me?”

“It means that you cant get with other guys, ok?”

Your blood began to boil. “NOT OK! What gives you the right to tell me that?”

Theo inhaled slowly, not knowing what to say. Suddenly, Theo pushed you away slightly and opened the car door, entering the backseat, his head in his hands.

You shook your head in frustration, storming over to the other side of the car, opening the door and sitting next to him.

“Theo- SERIOUSLY!” you yelled in annoyance. “How is it ok for you to hold my hand and hang out with me 24/7… LITERALLY all the time, and then say I’m not allowed to be with anyone else?” you asked. “It’s not like you want me, so am I just supposed to be alone forever? Watching you get with god knows how many girls, while I stay by myself because I’m apparently yours?”

Theo looked up at you. “What makes you think I don’t want you?” he asked.

You looked down, not knowing what to say, “I just know you don’t.”

“Well,” he began. “You’re wrong about that.”

You looked up and in an instant Theo’s lips were on yours. The sudden force of his body leaning into you pushed you backwards, leaning against the car door.

Theo opened his mouth and kissed you again, harder this time. He slid in his tongue and brushed it lightly against yours. Your eyes squeezed shut, as if you were sleeping, thinking this was all just a dream.

Theo pulled away from you, still close to your lips. His hand held your face delicately, stroking your cheek with his thumb. “You are mine.” he whispered, his breath warm against your lips, sending shivers down your spine. “Only mine…”

Your eyes fluttered open, looking into his.

“And I’m yours.”

You looked from his eyes to his lips, your eyes flickering, not knowing where to look. Then you decided on kissing him instead, so you smashed your lips against his, pushing him backwards as you climbed on top of him as he lay on the door on his side of the car.

He was sitting up and you were straddling him, moving your lips with his.

Theo’s hands were in your hair, pulling gently, trying to take control of the kiss.

Your hands travelled up his stomach and chest from under his shirt.

“Take it off.” he said.

You immediately pulled the shirt over his head and began kissing down his body.

Your lips travelled slowly to the waistband of his boxers, which were visible out of his jeans. You looked up at Theo and his head was cocked backwards in pleasure.

Moving your hands to his thighs, you lightly squeezed them as you let your tongue touch his stomach, travelling upwards, licking his abs and his chest until you reached his neck.

There was something about Theo that made you want to not only kiss him and make love to him, but it made you want to fuck him, rough and hard.

When you reached Theo’s neck, you bit down on the skin, hard, causing him to hiss in pleasure, pulling at your hair harder.

“Do that again.” he whispered.

You obliged and bit him again as you undid his jeans and began sliding them off his legs.

When you pulled away, Theo grabbed your head and kissed you roughly, kicking his shoes and jeans off himself.

You were in only a dress, so you could feel him hard against your increasingly wet panties.

He was now in only his boxers and you moved your hand to cup him, stroking him up and down through the pants with one finger.

Theo let out a sigh. “I need you.” he began. “Right now.” He sat up more, able to pick you up, your legs still wrapped around him.

He pushed you back onto your side of the car and leaned you against the door. Theo reached over to lock it as he reattached his lips to yours, pulling at your bottom lip as he caught it between his teeth.

You let out a soft moan, which made Theo harder.

“You’re mine.” he traced a finger over your panties, feeling your wetness through the material.

“I’m… yours…” you let out in a weak breath.

“Say that again, baby.” he pressed against you harder, weakening you even more.

“I’m yours.” You repeated, and then leaning in and biting Theo’s bottom lip hard, pulling at it.

Theo grunted, ripping your panties down your legs and pulling them off you. He traced his hand slowly back up your thigh, returning to your now exposed wetness. He pushed your legs apart further, spreading you open, ready for him.

He put his lips to your ear. “Louder.” he commanded, softly before entering two fingers inside you repeatedly, arching his fingers upwards against your G-spot.

“I’m yours. Fuck, Theo I’m all YOURS!” You yelled, before Theo pulled his fingers out of you, making you moan for more.

“You want more, baby?” he asked, biting down hard on his own lip. You nodded eagerly.

“I want you to fuck me, Theo. Please fuck me hard.” you closed your eyes, tracing your hand over his boxers and pushing against it.

He growled, taking his boxers off and pushing your legs apart with his own.

Theo entered you harshly and kissed you roughly, with loud breathing.

Your hands were now in his hair, pulling and tugging hard.

Theo was grunting and moaning into your mouth, making you want him to push into you harder.

“Theo- I want ALL of you.” you pleaded.

Theo looked at you with lust-filled eyes, and smiled greedily. “Anything for you, princess.”

He pushed his whole length inside you, causing you to arch your back. You felt a tingle inside you- a sweetness you wanted him to keep hitting until it unleashed all your energy.

“You want me to fuck you hard, baby?”  Theo spoke in your ear, biting at it as he pushed and pulled in and out of your repeatedly and rapidly.

He fucked you faster and harder, pushing you almost to your limit.

“Yes- YES, please!” You yelled, digging your nails into his back and sliding them down, scratching him.

“Yeah? Just like that, y/n?” Theo continued to fuck you, moaning. “Oh, fuck.” he said.

“Mmmm” you let out. “I’m almost-“

You were cut off. “Me too, baby.” his speed and pressure was intense now causing you to moan louder and louder until you began to scream his name.

“FUCK, THEO! FUCK, I’M YOURS, OK? I’M YOURS, BABY! MAKE ME CUM!” You screamed with feeling.

“YES, BABY I WILL, FOR YOU. FUCK, Y/N, FUCK!” Theo came inside you as you came around him.

His final thrusts were his best and you weakened entirely as soon as you finished.

“Oh my god!” Theo said. “Fuck! How are you so fucking amazing?” he asked.

You laughed. “Because I belong to the most fucking sexy guy in Beacon Hills.”

“Don’t forget, I’m yours as well, baby.” Theo kissed you softly, lingering his lips on yours, biting a little.

“I thought friends didn’t want to fuck each other.” You laughed.

“Well, I guess we’re more than friends, huh?” Theo kissed down your neck softly.

(It’s sappy…its adorable and its right up my alleyway!!! I love how sweet and just simple the idea of having someone with you for almost a year. I have never had that pleasure but let me tell you this, I have seen all the beautiful and amazing things that are in a relationship. Thank you for allowing me to bring this idea to life Anon. Enjoy this sweetie!!! ^_^ Mod Firefly)

Hanzo-
Dressed in traditional kimono and ceremonial garments, he watched as they walked around with eyes as wide as the moon itself over Hanamura. He decided to bring them to a local festival to show how the New Year was celebrated in Hanamura. He smiled gently as they looked at all the different vendors giving out various treats from fruit filled rice balls to fried balls of dough with miso filling, as if this was the best thing in the world.

He remembered the past year with them and could not help but feel a swell of pride in his heart. They were caught in the crossfire during one of the missions but it went wrong when he was ambushed by a Talon agent. Instead of running from danger, he watched them grab something and tried to save him as he was trying to find a single arrow to launch at the newest target. They got away with a new scar on their hand from the blade but also made away with this serious man’s heart.

“(Y/N)-san, are you having fun?” He smiled as he saw them smiling at one of the many puppet shows that was put on during their walk. “Oh yes, Shimada-sama” They smiled as he shook his head and walked closer to them. “I told you to call me Hanzo, my dearest.” He smiles as they blush and nod before looking down at their hands. “I guess old habits die hard, I am sorry.” Was whispered as he holds their chin gently in his hands and smiles at them. It was true because they were first just colleagues working for Overwatch but after that day and seeing them just a strong as they were quiet, it made him feel like he was not truly alone anymore.

“Do not apologize, I understand how hard it is to change but we will have forever to work on each other. If you will have me?” He questions as they smile and hold his hands gently by laying theirs over his. “I would have no other.” He smiles at their reply as he watches their eyes and leans in for a kiss just as the New Year rang in.

This was his promise, to love, honor and protect them, all of that was expressed in a kiss that was shared with the one who pierced his heart.



Lucio-
“Let’s get this party started!” He would yell as he spun a new song from the DJ booth he had playing at since they started this party about 3 hours ago. Hollywood was hopping and he loved watching the love of his life dance around, glow sticks around their neck and laughing as they drank something that looked like punch from a glass. He smiled as he started to feel the beat get amplified as he remembers that it was a night like this when they first met.

He was DJing a new club not far from here when they bumped into each other last New Year’s Eve, spilling drinks and him dropping the mix tape he had made just for the club. He went crazy trying to find it but was surprised when he went to the studio that it was supposed to be at and saw that they were listening to the song as he smiles. “Sorry, is this yours?” They say with a smile as he nods and to this day; they have been inseparable. He has took them on a few of his tours and even introduced them to his family, only to be surprised that his family seemed to be attached to them.

He finally told them he was in Overwatch yet they smiled as they held his hand and told him that they are not leaving him alone. He was surprised and told them that he was going to keep them safe, swearing that every single song he writes will be because of their inspiration to him. He as only took them on one mission and seeing that they were as great with music, but for more of an offense and could make any instrument out of air, making it a weapon or beauty, he has decided to make sure that he keep them safe.

He smiles as he walks to them, his music still playing as he pulls them to his arms and then leads them away from some fans that were asking questions. “Thanks for the save, DJ” They wink as he smiles and lets them pick the next songs all the way until midnight, happy that he gets to spend the next year with them, just hoping that maybe this year, he is hoping to release more duets than he is singles.



McCree-
All this man wants at this very moment are his whiskey, his cigar and the love of his life (other than his gun and hat) in his arms as they watch some older westerns on the TV in his room. He was invited to a party by Tracer and Mercy but seeing how he just got back from a mission, he wanted a chance to be with them and do something other than train or talk about missions.

“Darlin’ just let me say that I love being with you rather than be stuck on some point.” He smiles as they laugh and kiss his cheek. “I know Jes, you have said that about 10 times tonight.” He can’t help but smile as he plays with their hair and thinks back over the last year with them. They knew each other during his Deadlock days but he started to really fall for them for right after he joined Blackwatch but only confessed when he joined them on the recall.

“Whatcha thinkin’ about cowboy?” They smile at him as he pets their hair again and smiles. “Just that a lot has happened in the past year and it has been an amazing year. I mean, we have been friends for so long, I knew I would fall for you but I did not realize I would fall this hard.” He says and knows that he has their undivided attention and he holds them with a gentle smile on his face.

“I mean, when we met, I was runnin’ from those that wanted the price on my neck yet when you found me, all bloody and near death, you risked your life and saved a total stranger. Hell, I slept in your bed the first night we met.” He laughs as they smirk. “You got blood on my sheets cowboy and you also were going to bleed to death unless I did something so I just saved ya.” They shrugged and he shakes he head before looking at the tv, still talking.

“That’s the thing, when you found out about my true past, you didn’t run or try to turn me in, you asked me what was more important; our friendship or my past. I knew then that you were going to be an amazing person to have around. You didn’t judge me when I was with Blackwatch but always told me to be careful or I would be in more trouble than anything I could be on a mission.” He laughs as they smile and nod.

“Then when it was disbanded, you still stayed by my side and loved all of my stupid quirks. I am just sorry it took me until this close to the new year to say this.” He stands up and shocks them as he gets down on one knee as the clock tolls Midnight.

“Wanna marry this old cowboy?”

*- ^_^ Mod Firefly ^_^ -*

((Posted from Mobile))

Hidden Truths

Summary: Jaebum won’t leave until you hear the truth; painful or not.

Word Count: 1,497

Originally posted by imjaeboms

You watched the dew drop fall from the leaves on the tree outside of your office window. There was a slight fog that covered the streets as the sun started to rise and cars began to fill the streets. You always loved getting to work early and watching the crowds of people form. After hours of people gazing you breathed in the scent of perfume from no doubt, your secretary who always wore Japanese Cherry Blossom everyday of her life. But somehow the smell was a comforting reminder of the office. 

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Crystals

I’ve hear mixed reviews about people letting others touch their crystals. Crystals are your friends and you should treat them as such. However, with this being said, this is not a necessary action. I myself am quite reserved and cannot stand the idea let alone the action of people touching my crystals unless i feel it absolutely necessary that i give them one to keep. My crystals are very important to me and will remain forever so. If you do let people touch and hold your crystals please please please remember to cleanse them once people are finished handing them, you don’t really know what energy is attached to this person, you wouldn’t leave your hands with harmful bacteria on them and i firmly believe that you shouldn’t allow you crystals to be left with unfamiliar energy. 

Infinity Part 15

**GIF NOT MINE

Part 1  2  3  4  5  6  7  8  9  10  11  12  13  14  16

Characters:  Mark Tuan (GOT7), You (Reader/OC), Park Jinyoung (GOT7), GOT7 members, Mark’s parents, Marika (Your friend), and other surprise characters

Genre:  Slow Build, Mainly Angst, Minor Fluff, Smut (on previous and future chapters)

Warning/s:  Heavy Angst, like Angst almost 90% of this chapter – more revelations and all those shit

Length:     3,959 words

Plot:  You have always believed the line from your favorite book that some infinities are larger or smaller than other infinities. You always wonder if you even have an infinity that you get to spend with someone or you will be forever alone?

A/N: I AM TRYING TO FINISH THIS STORY ASAP BUT PLEASE DON’T TRUST ME TOO MUCH HAHAHA.


A few days after Junhyung had witnessed his wife crying over her lost daughter for the nth time for the last 10 years, he had went to visit the orphanage in Busan where his wife’s daughter was handed over after she left (Y/C/O).  He went straight to a friend of his who works in the orphanage and sat down in front of his desk.

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Imagine sleeping next to Sherlock

You were tired after a long day’s work and all you want to do is lay down and rest with the comfort of Sherlock’s body next to yours.

But that proved to be a bit more difficult than you thought…

You closed your eyes as you lied on your side, thankful for the fresh pillow covers and sheets, or at least you would be, if only Sherlock would quit fidgeting.

“Nng- Tsk.” Sherlock groaned and grunted with his every toss and turn.

“Sherlock.” You sleepily called, voice muffled by the pillow.

“Hmm?”

“Keep still, please.”

“Right. Sorry.” He replied and he actually did keep still… A little too still. And with that, you were faced with a new problem.

“Sherlock.” You called once more.

“Y/N.” He breathed with a hint of his uneasiness.

“I can literally feel you staring at me.”

“That’s not possible.” He replied and you smiled a little.

“It so is.” You slightly chuckled. “Close your eyes, babe.” You said and with a grunt, you assumed he closed his eyes.

You were a few hours in when you felt fingers nudging at your shoulders.

“Y/N.” He whispered. “Hey, Y/N.”

“Huh- What- Sherlock?” You asked as you slowly blinked yourself awake and you saw Sherlock looking at you with a worried face. “Is something wrong?”

“D-Do you like me?” He asked with a serious expression.

“Jesus, Sherlock. Go back to sleep.” You lightly sighed as you turned your back on him but his hand caught and held you, stopping you from moving.

“I need to know, Y/N.” He whispered as he searched for your eyes. “Please?” He added. You weren’t surprised by his question, the truth is he often asked you but it’s the first time he did so at 2am.

“I married you, Sherlock.” You smiled and went back to facing him. “I’m in love with you.” You giggled.

“Yes, but are you in love with me, like, as a friend? Or-” He started to mumble and you giggled louder. “Don’t laugh at me.” He scoffed. “I’m very serious.”

“Hello, very serious.” You cracked a joke but it wasn’t as funny to him as it was to you.

“Y/N!” He scolded.

“Listen,” You started after laughing. “I love you, okay? Possibly more than life itself. Now, I know that that probably isn’t healthy but nothing and no one in this twisted world is going to change that.” You smiled and he seemed to relax at your words.

“Really?” He breathed. “You won’t leave me?”

“Never.” You reassured him. “And besides you said it yourself, you have me in you and I, apparently, have ‘Holmes’ in me.” You said. “Literally.” You added, bringing your left hand to feel the bump in your stomach.

Holmeses, you mean.” He smiled fondly as he covered your hand with his warmer one. You rolled your eyes at his constant reminder.

“Yeah, well, running after two little Sherlocks for the rest of my life? No way am I doing that alone.” You shook your head. “So I guess you’re stuck with me forever.” You chuckled.

“Wouldn’t have it any other way.”

Tw: Suicide, God, Poetry

I name myself by trigger warnings.

God killed her in eighth grade.
I shouldn’t blame God, though.
She killed her in eighth grade.
If you listen to my brain,
I killed her in eighth grade.

Eighth grade.
I wish for nothing more
Than for this to be a metaphor.

Society killed her, really, in eighth grade.

Who kills an eighth grader?
An abusive boyfriend,
Rape, attempted, completed, threatened,
Conservatives screaming queer,
The Mormon Church, telling her that she will kill her family
And teachers who laugh at gay jokes.
They killed an eighth grade girl.

God, let her read this.
God, let her see this—
You have your hand in this mess I know and I trust you know what you’re doing but
…it feels like you don’t.

One day when I’m older and alone,
Married to an eighth grade girl,
I will look back and say
This made me who I am.
Her,
The absence of her,
The abrupt, jarring, forever end of her.

I was in eighth grade. So was she.
Why am I the one allowed to grow up?

My thoughts interject and interrupt each other and have since, well,
Eighth grade.

Don’t commit suicide.
Don’t kill yourself.
Dear God, do not allow society or
Your abuser or your rape or your church or your bystanders or those assholes who call “queer” an umbrella term to kill you!

Life sucks! I know!
But I am here, forever an eighth grader,
Here to tell and ask and beg you to please, please, don’t let them kill you.
Don’t let me kill you.
Don’t let anybody kill you,
Not even yourself.

8

BATGIRL FTW

(on sale on etsy)

So elusive-j put Batgirl #35 (written by brendenfletcher) into my hands the other day and god am I glad she did. I used to scoff at DC, swearing my undying allegiance to Marvel and Marvel alone, unwilling to plunge myself into what I thought to bed dark, gloomy and self-involved plotlines of the forever depressive Batman and his unbearably naive counterpart Superman.

I was so wrong…!

Batgirl is fresh, new, colorful; with real life and real characters and amazing art. I was immediately taken by the complexity of her personality - she is a human and acts the way humans do - sometimes awesomely, but also sometimes wrongly or selfishly. She doesn’t have this “nobility-sooper-righteousness-I-am-god-of-good” complex and in three words - I loved it. 

And then! babsdraws came to fantasticcomics and I got to meet her and show off the piece to her and get my issue autographed, which was amazing even though I just babbled incoherently the whole time. 

So I hope you all enjoy this last piece, probably the last one for a bit of a while - Midterm #2 just happened in the class I teach and now I have 220 copies to grade. Yeah. 

It is made of about 176 pieces of glass (although I’m sure I counted it wrong), some of which are… really small. I think the smallest one is the tiny bit of hair strand on top of her jacket, a couple of millimeters long. My large SAGA Alana piece had about the same number of individual glass pieces! 

The hair is a whispy orange, the painted-on details are the face, ear, gloves, satchel and boot laces - everything else is solder lines. I wanted to maintain the illusion that she is swinging from the rope she is holding by attaching the anchor ring atop her hand, where the rope end would be. The yellow glass for the cloak is actually wavy and textured waterglass to give it the impression that it is a wavy piece of fabric (you can kind of see it in the third picture). 

:D

Addicted To You (Sherlock)

Paring: Sherlock/Reader

Language: English

Words: 1460

Summary: Reader being on the bottom of things and not being able to solve her long owned case. She accidently overdoses on drugs and Sherlock’s find her in her apartment.

A/N: I would just like to point out that I don’t in slightest consider this one being of my best works, but I had so much fun writing this. It’s a ittle bit on the shorter side, but I hope it’s still enjoyable. Maybe it’s right to say that I’m not native speaker, so please forgive any mistakes. This is also requested, so I hope you enjoyed, Alex. :)

Sometimes it all gets a bit too much and there’re days I can hardly make it thought. I started noticing how much my mood began to change sometimes between the last few days. Since my work requires me to be fully concentrated, it was easy for me to notice, that I was everything but that. My mind wouldn’t let me focus and I couldn’t make any progress what so ever in my current case. Normally I would be finish with the case by now, but this time I was stuck with that case for week with not even slightest progress. Nobody could possibly understand how embarrassing and frustrating that is for me. Not being able to do my job correctly drives me crazy.

Today I had enough; I just couldn’t do this anymore. I felt just like everybody else, I felt ordinary and incapable to help others. Solving crimes is the only thing I really have in my life and without my job, I’m not complete.

There’s just one more thing that makes me even more frustrated and angry. All this time I have been competing with my annoying neighbour who was the only person in the entire world that could understand the feeling of happiness, when you finally solve your case. But lately I wasn’t able to do that, because I didn’t solve anything like he did.

Sherlock Holmes could be your friend or you enemy, yet for me he was somebody I could always rely on and share my ideas on my cases. I think he always appreciated my company, since we were so alike, but something changed the last week. Since I’ve became so ordinary, I wasn’t worthy of his company and we’ve became just neighbours. We said hello to the other one, when we passed each other on the hallway, but that was it. He was always out solving his amazing crimes with his friend John and I was alone in my apartment trying so hard to make some progress.

It took me a while to understand, where Sherlock took all his great deductions. I mean all of us knew about his mind palace, but had you ever thought about how does it work? When you’re really stuck and can’t move anymore, your brain doesn’t just make all the work. You can be smart like no one else, but there’s only one simple solution to this. It’s simple really if you know how to pull the strings. Everyone says that drugs are quiet killers and that you shouldn’t ever start. That can be partly true, but if you can control your actions, it can be helpful. I mean, it’s working with Sherlock. If he can do it, I certainly can too.

I’ve always taken just a little bit to help my brain out. But today the dose wasn’t working. My brain would just not work. People do a lot of stupid decisions when they’re feeling desperate and you can’t even imagine, how much desperate I was it that moment. In one moment everything was amazing after the next and bigger dose. I could finally concentrate; I could see that whole case in front of me and it was such a relief. Until my body failed me and I found myself laying on the cold floor without being able to scream for help or to move. I remember staring at the ceiling with teary eyes preying that somebody would find me and help me.

I’ve been lying on that floor for gods know how long; time had stopped in that moment. Suddenly the door shuts open and in the next second a person is leaning over me. My vision is blurred and I can’t hear properly, but I swear that I’ve heard that person speak to me. And after that I’ve lost my consciousness and everything became black.

+++++

I know exactly where I am the moment I open my eyes. Seeing the white walls and smelling the disinfection stablish my opinion that I’m in hospital. I try to sit up, but the pain pins me back to the hospital bed. What happened to me? After few moment of being alone in that hospital room, the door finally opens. I couldn’t be more relieved that I didn’t have to be alone with just my currently boring mind.

“I see you’ve woken up,” I hear a familiar voice and roll my eyes. Can we not right now, please?

“What are you doing here, Sherlock? Don’t you have some case to take care of?” I say angrily and sit up even though all the pain.

“I do actually,” he nods and sits to the chair next to my bed, “and I was about to head to the crime scene, when I heard a suspicious noise from the downstairs apartment.”

“You found me?” I ask by surprise.

“I did. Could you tell me, what the hell where you thinking, (Y/N)?” he asks with his voice up. I’m taken by his actions. He had never yelled at me before, not like this. “Do you understand that you could have died? It could have killed you!”

“I needed it, Sherlock! Don’t you get that? Of all of the people, you should know!”

“Why could you possibly need it, (Y/N)?” he ask confusedly.

“For a case, Sherlock! It’s really embarrassing, okay? Admitting that I wasn’t able to solve it myself drives me crazy and I know, how much you must despise me right now for what I’ve done, but I couldn’t live with it anymore. Me solving crimes is all I have and without my job I feel empty, like my word doesn’t have a meaning,” I look at him shyly. “You can try to make me feel as bad as you want, Sherlock, but you can’t hide to me the truth. You’re just like me. You’re even worst, so don’t try to lecture me. You’ve broken down after hearing about Moriarty.”

“You’ve helped to get through it,” he points out.

“That right, I guess I did that.”

“So let me help you,” he reaches for my hand I hesitantly let him take it. My heart almost stops, when he holds my hand in his. “Please, don’t become someone I am.”

“Sherlock,” I whisper, “you should focus on your work, that’s what you do best. I can handle myself, you know that. It’s not like were friends anyways. Not after what happened last week. Not after you started ignoring me.”

“It’s not like that.”

“Oh, is that so? So you didn’t start thinking about how ordinary I was or how stupid I was, because I was unable to solve my case? I’ve been on the bottom of the ocean, Sherlock, and all I needed was someone to hold me up, so I didn’t drown. The truth is that you left me to drown, Sherlock. So yeah, we’re not friends and we’ll never be,” after I finish my thoughts I pull away from him; my hand starting with.

“That was in no means my intention, (Y/N),” he speaks after a while. “It’s just that… I couldn’t look at you, when you were so down. Seeing you like that literally broke my heart every time.”

“What am I supposed to say to that?” I look at him.

“That you agree?”

“What if I just don’t believe that, Sherlock? You most definitely didn’t show that I would matter to you. You don’t show that to people, you know? Most people let the others know if they actually care.”

“I’m not good at that, you know that.”

“I do,” I nod, “but maybe you could at least try, Sherlock. You own me.”

“You’re really stubborn, do you know that?” he asks and I smile at him. “With you I feel different. You make me so angry sometimes, you frustrate me, but you’re the only person who ever came close to who I am. When others don’t get me, you do. When I wanted to be alone, you stayed. When I treated you badly, you still stayed. You were with me no matter what, (Y/N). Even after I became addicted to drugs. And now… I’m addicted to you.”

“Sherlock? What are you saying?” I whisper.

“I love you, (Y/N). Sorry that it took me so long to finally understand.”

After that every piece of anger I have left disappears forever. I reach or Sherlock’s hand and hold it in my. With a little unsure smile from him I finally do what I wanted to do for such a long time. I press my lips on his to a gentle yet passionate kiss. When we finally broke apart, I can’t stop smiling.

“I guess I’m addicted to you as well,” I whisper and let Sherlock kiss me once more.

molicioushat  asked:

Hey, I know it's kinda late, but if you're still taking prompts could you do Serenei of Lys and Shiera Seastar for Love.

PARENT-OFFSPRING DRABBLES

Serenei of Lys & Shiera Seastar, love

“Aunt Missy, tell me again about my mother.”

Aunt Missy is not really Shiera’s aunt at all - perhaps a stepmother, one of many, would be closer to the mark - but ‘Aunt Missy’ is what she has always called her, though there are times when Shiera longs to call her ‘Mother’ just like Mya, Gwenys and Brynden do.

“Your mother had the most wonderful laugh,” Aunt Missy says, her face blooming into a smile, her hand still busily brushing Shiera’s hair. “And she was great with the children. She always had wonderful treats laid out for my children when we came to court. Not just sweets and puddings, but tales and songs too. Tales you could not find anywhere else in the Seven Kingdoms and beyond, Brynden used to say.

“Was … was she really a sorceress, like those men in court said?” Shiera is only seven, and certain things are beyond her comprehension, but she could hear just fine. More than fine. The sorceress’ daughter, they had pointed at her and whispered, the last time Aunt Missy took her to court.

“Your mother had certain gifts,” Aunt Missy replies. “She saw things that other could not. They did not understand it, and thus called it sorcery.”

“She couldn’t have been one, I am sure of it,” Shiera says adamantly. “She couldn’t have been a sorceress. If she had truly been a sorceress, she would have lived forever. Forever and ever. She would not have died and left me alone.”

The hand brushing her hair ceases to move. “Do you really feel so alone, child?”

“No, not really,” Shiera admits.  “I have you. And Mya and Gwenys. And Brynden too.”

“But you still miss your mother. Of course you do. It is only natural,” Aunt Missy says, after kissing Shiera’s cheek.

“If my mother really had those gifts you mentioned, why couldn’t she have done something to keep herself alive? For me. For her daughter.” Raising her tear-stained face, Shiera asks, “Didn’t she love me, Aunt Missy?”

Embracing Shiera tightly, Aunt Missy says, “She loved you dearly, Shiera, even before you were born. She knew you would be a girl when you had barely quickened in her womb. She chose your name as early as that. And she entrusted you to my care, for she also knew she would not live to see you grow to be a girl, to be a woman, and there was nothing she could do about that.”

I am patience, the steady rhythm of rain tapping on glass until the window is opened and water rushes in. I am the early bird who never gets the worm, but continues to be up before dawn- just in case. I am the love letters that sit quietly at the bottom of your desk drawer and eternally hope to be sent someday and caressed by new, adoring hands. I am the heart at its best: always understanding, consistently affectionate, and forever faithful. But I am also your downfall. I am as sturdy as a brick wall that keeps you from your dreams that rest on the other side. I am a whale that swallows your responses of dissent and the crane that swoops in with the submissive words of consent to wait. And so you will wait- you will wait for the love and attention that you crave instead of seeking it for yourself, and you will stand forever alone in the chill of an eternal night. Fear me, for I am everywhere, everything, and in everyone, and I will not be conquered.
The Signs as Paramore: the Self-Titled Album Lyrics

Aries: “Hollowed out and filled up with hate. All we wanted is you to give us a break.” // Fast In My Car //

Taurus: “And what if I don’t ever want to leave my house? Sit on the couch while all my friends are going out. You should be alone. Yea, you should be alone. You should be alone with me.” // Be Alone //

Gemini: “It depends on the day, the extent of all my worthless rage. I’m not angry anymore.” // Interlude: I’m Not Angry Anymore //

Cancer: “What do you mean I got it backwards. You know we’re gonna be forever.” // (One of those) Crazy Girls //

Leo: “Can’t count the years on one hand that we’ve been together. I need the other one to hold you make you feel, make you feel better.” // Still Into You //

Virgo: “Baby if I’m half the many I say I am, If I’m a woman with no fear just like I claim I am, then I’ll believe in what you say. There’s nothing left for you to do. The only proof that I need is you.” // Proof //

Libra: “Well I could be angry, but you’re not worth a fight. Besides I’m moving on.” // Interlude: Moving On //  

Scorpio: “Maybe it’s been years since I’ve genuinely smiled. And maybe it’s been years since I’ve wanted to be a part of anything.” // Tell Me It’s Okay //

Sagittarius: “Why do you care what people think? Are you hooked up to their leash? You know anklebiters ate up your personality.” // Anklebiters //

Capricorn: “Now we can move onto facing bigger problems. No more high school drama, graduated with honors.” // Interlude: Holiday //

Aquarius: “And lady I don’t want your pity. So don’t feel bad for me. I’ve got a love I would die for and a song to sing. Maybe we’re both just living out our dream.” // Grow Up //

Pisces: “I wanna get out and build my own home, on a street where reality is not much different from the dreams I’ve had.” // Daydreaming //

You weren’t here and then you are
Coming in like a quick storm
Flooding me with affection
Sprouting from my barren edges
Building a forest out of these limbs
Making me an unexpected adventure

You weren’t here and then you are
Beside me, Underneath me
On top of me, Inside me
Suddenly we are stirring, moving, melting
Our pieces creating a masterpiece
That even ourselves can not decipher

You weren’t here and then you are
Whispering forevers in my mouth
Calling me your home, calling me your all
Suddenly my name is not my name
But yours, I am yours and yours alone
Yet you never mentioned being mine

You weren’t here and then you are
Packing my heart inside your suitcase
Stepping on my puddle of tears
Watching me crumble as you wash your hands
Rushing to the other side of the world
Without the audicity of saying goodbye

You weren’t here and then you are
All around me, Burning me
Destroying me, Eating me alive
Suddenly the world has become
A eulogy of what we were
And what we can never be

You were here
And then you aren’t

—  n.a., Quick Storm
Kaneki x Hide story - tonight is the last time

(AU where Hide become a member in one of CCG team and Kaneki ken was rumored or told to the media as a dead man)
Under the snowy day, two boy found in the middle of destroyed city, their name is Kaneki and Hide
Kaneki and Hide looked at each other, there was a big fight between CCG and Ghoul, some snow fell down to ground that covered by blood and fleshes, both ghoul and humans.

“Hide..what to do? Tonight is the bloodiest night..” A CCG member looked at Hide. Hide just shook head, “it is clear! We must fight! I already predicted and know what to do!” Hide smiled and try to lift everyone’s spirit with his light and warm smile. Suddenly there was a ghoul running around them, the CCG quickly guarding up but each of them dead when other ghoul approaching them and attacking them.

A white haired ghoul was visible on building rooftop, his hair reflected the shine of full moon very well and his red eye glowing, he stepped down to ground and showing his kagune, “me…at..I need..meat…” That ghoul was…unfortunately Kaneki, Hide best friend forever. Kaneki’s heart and mind consumed by his ghoul instincts and will, “l-leave me alone..g-ghoul..I am a ghoul..no a human.my..name is..who is my name..” Kaneki wondered in the middle of fight, dodging every single attack and even taking brutal bite on his opponent for both ghoul and human, biting their guts, neck, hand and everything.
“Delicious..meat..need more..aogiri make me hungry…” Kaneki start grinning like a mad man and drenched with his victim blood, some CCG escapes but get killed by him and other ghoul. Kaneki just walk straight without bothering nor thinking about anything. His heart filled with darkness and despair, like the dark sky that showered its prey with heavy rain and thunder.
“Kaneki! Y-you are here. How can you escaped?!” Touka was surprised for finding Kaneki.
“Who..who are you. I don’t care I don’t care. I lost everything. I lose everyone. Mother mother..I am here..” Kaneki laughed and cried hysterically and take some breathed and looking at Touka. Touka was afraid and Kaneki pushed her across the building, leaving her like that. He does not even know where his feet take him long enough, a little spark of hope tell him to move forward, even if Kaneki don’t realized it.

Those feet pushed Kaneki to Hide, Hide was protecting himself and comrades from the ghoul, “Who..who are you. Don’t get in my way..” Kaneki growled like animal and looked at Hide. Hide was jolted in surprised, he felt happy for seeing Kaneki but scared for seeing him like that..

“Kaneki?”

“I am..my name..is Kaneki?” Kaneki answered, he come back to his consinuouses came back a bit, a little memory played in his mind.

“I must be dreaming…” Kaneki whispered and a tear was shed, the tear was red crimson blood, suddenly went to blank in a sevond.

—*munch munch*—
—*cracked bones sounds*–

“K-kaneki..what…are you doing? It hurts..it..hurts..” A weak whisper heard on Kaneki’s ears. “Don’t give up..”

Kaneki finally came back to his sense, his eyes looked at Hide, realizing his own hand was holding Hide closely, but…his mouth was on Hide’s shoulder, eating him when his sight went blank and making Hide’s shoulder bleeding and destroyed.

“HIDE GO AWAY! IT IS IS THE BEST YOU LEAVE ME ALONE! IT IS TOO DARK HERE! I CANT CONTROL IT. A LITTLE LIGHT WONT HELP, I AM ON GHOUL SIDE, IT IS MY FAULT YOU GET HURTED!*” Kaneki yelled to a dark sky with shining stars that could not be seen through Kaneki’s tears, “Hide I am sorry..I always feels walk alone. Never realized you are here on my side..” Kaneki felt so guilty that feels like something pierced his mind and soul, “I am sorry..”

“Kaneki…..” Hide held and covered his wound, “Kaneki..it is fine…” Hide realized how big burden that Kaneki carried on his back on his lonely journey road, “Kaneki! I will find a way to help you…”

“Why..? For me? A monster like me?” Kaneki shocked and wiped his tears like a kid.

“Because you are always be a lonely kid..I will help you..until you are not alone..” Hide know his voice weakening then he shout, “Medic! Come here!”.

Medic team came there confused, “ Hide..” They carried Hide on ambulance, “we will take you on hospital!”

“No..take him..too..he was..a human..I know him..” Hide pointed at Kaneki who is crying and held down by the CCG, “I want to be with him..”

“∆∆∆∆×∆∆∆××××××”** Hide whispered to the medic with his weakening voice

“But…” The medic get worried but nodded

“What..?” Kaneki looked at him, try to guess what is Hide whispering to the medic. Suddenly a sleeping injection pushed down his neck and Kaneki fell asleep and put inside the ambulance, leaving the bloody street where corpse sleep and dream for living shattered.

—-few days later…

Kaneki woke up inside hospital, he got bandage everywhere specially his gut, “what..happened?”

“Good..morning Kaneki..” A weak blonde man looked at him, his stomatch attached with many equipment. “How are you feeling? Want to read novel?” He blinked and laughed.

“Hide..? Why Hide? Why must you Hide?” Kaneki cried when he saw that man, it was Hide after all.

“Oh well..just friend that want to help you..” Hide smiled and moved his legs, “You are not ghoul anymore! I replaced your ghoul organs with mine! Well..doctor said my organ transplant will arrived few days..” Hide sighed and fold a bird paper crane, “here is for you! I wonder if It can fly…” Hide muttered and looked at Kaneki and smiled.

“H-hide..you..always..protect me…” Kaneki cried and sniffled and walked to Hide’s bed, hugging him tightly. “Thank you.. Thank you..I don’t feel lonely anymore..” He felt a bit sad when he realized Hide’s shoulder get replaced with mechanic one.

“It is fine..I am your sunshine. And sunshine is for destroying darkness…” Hide smiled and hugged back

———–the end——-
*=inspired by It Ends tonight - All American Reject lyric
Also thanks for reading ^∆^ hidekane for life. Story inspired by Boulevard of Lonely road and it Ends tonight songs!

anonymous asked:

What are your thoughts on the Naruto ending? :/

Hello, anon! Sorry for not replying before! I’ve been keeping up with the spoilers, so I’ve had time to make peace with what happened; but I wanted to wait for the full-chapter to be out in order to get the full picture and make a proper comment about it.

Warning: this got long! My apologies to those who are in their cellphones ;~;

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