on a shallow note

Haise’s Birthday Poem begins with the lines [x]:

“Someone said this:
“Even if you have no memories of being loved, for as long as you have memories of loving someone, you can continue to live.”

…But how is someone who has never been loved be capable of loving someone else?

A child who wasn’t able to receive the minimal love they required at the time they needed it the most will continue to gaze at the illusion of affection and never know how to love until the day they die.

Well, how about me? Can I continue to live?”

Furuta grew up without love, surrounded by the products of Tsuneyoshi’s fucked up harem. The only person who seems to have shown any affection at all for him, as seen in the flashback in this chapter, is Rize. Rize who cared if he died when she ate him. Rize who played with him. Rize, whose fate he was fully aware of. Who he saved, because at some point, or maybe deep down still, he understood that that fate is wrong. She was the only thing he had, and he let her go, for her sake.

In this explanation to Kaneki, he mentions explicitly that as a child, he had these childish ideas of love and marriage in the future for them. Things he gave up for her safety from the men of the main Washuu house.

Even when he’s being crude and creepy, talking about Rize having all of those children for him, he references 101 Dalmatians. A Disney movie. And one with some of the healthiest romances, both between the dogs and the humans.

Even now, he’s looking at a Disney movie where two dogs snuggle each other. Where these two dogs have 15 puppies who they risk their lives to save. And who adopt 84 other puppies who would otherwise be dead. When you think about him as someone who grew up surrounded by who knows how many half-siblings, in the Garden like he did - this is basically him saying he wants a Disney Romance.

Which is not to say that the way he’s speaking isn’t terrible. That the tropes he’s using aren’t horrible and misogynistic. They are. Furuta, as he always has, is falling back on farce and drama, on systems of power that he himself as already explicitly told you he condemns. Furuta switches between honest and lying, between truth and exaggeration, between real emotion and fake dramatic flare over and over.

He speaks in this weird mix between a cynical jaded, crude adult, and a desperate, sad, idealistic, stubborn child. Like with his big speech to Eto about V in 66, I think this chapter he is mixing truth and fiction. Sometimes strategically, sometimes just because.

@linkspooky​ pointed out to me that it almost seems that the more honest he’s being, the less of his face is shown. Times when he’s really approaching sincerity and seriousness, he’s shown from the side.

Where as most of the time, he’s hidden under his flare and his masks and his drama.

Furuta, for all his fake emotion, is clearly uncomfortable with the real thing. Uncomfortable when people make him feel things and uncomfortable expressing emotion. Uncomfortable and unskilled and really parsing it.

Instead, he falls back on theatre and performance and lies.

When he says he couldn’t bare the thought of her having a kid after being free for so long… was he talking (just) about jealousy, or was he talking about the fact that the CCG, and thus V, was gaining on her - had almost captured her in the 6th ward and gotten Shachi in the struggle, and was well on their way to tracking her down again? Was he talking about not wanting her to be free, or about after all that time, still not being able to accept the idea of her being recaptured by V and used by the Washuu men like that.

He used her too, of course - and brutally. I think he was mad at her not only for wasting the freedom he helped her win, for almost getting caught again - but also because he still cares. And he doesn’t want to still care about her. So he punished her for his own feelings. Furuta is… not a fan of his own feelings. And he’s childish.

Its not an excuse for what he did to her, but I do think he acted when he did, if not the way he did, because if he hadn’t, there was a very real chance she’d have returned to her old fate. And that, he could not abide. Even now.

What he did, to Rize, in taking her power and undergoing that surgery himself, in killing off all the Washuu, taking leadership of the CCG - he gives multiple reasons for it even in this one conversation with Kaneki. On the one hand, in his proposal to Kaneki, he sets up a clear role for himself - as a villain to unite ghouls and humans against (Kaneki’s team, rather than the CCG and Clowns in this case) and introduces it as a big production, culminating in his own, rather than Kaneki’s death - ever suicidal as he is.

But explicitly, he also claims that people don’t need reasons for what they do. He also claims that he is doing what he wants to do, and that he is doing what he wanted to do as a child.

I think all of these have a grain of truth to them. He talks in such a way that mixes narratives, mixes truth and fiction, and sometimes just because its easier to talk with (half)fake emotion than real ones.

I think that Furuta, the nearly 6 year old child wants to destroy the toxic terrible “family” that used and abused him, and create in its place a 101 Dalmations style family, with him and Rize as Pongo and Perdita. A big loving, new Washuu family. This part of Furuta doesn’t care about ghouls or humans or Kaneki Ken or Eto Yoshimura or any of that at all.

But Furuta is also an adult, and became one probably much too quickly, if he knew what awaited Rize and helped her escape because if it. And the Adult Furuta knows he can’t have any of that. That Rize forgot about him and doesn’t love him back and that he burned that bridge by dropping those beams. His children with her are going to be via Kanou. Anything new will be born from death and fire and war. Adult Furuta has plans. Adult Furuta wants.…something… out of all of this. Some grand finale.

Part of Furuta is still that child - still wants Rize to come back to him and love him and play with him (and maybe kill him). Wants a big happy Disney ending for them. But he also knows he can never really have that. He’s known that he could never have that, because of how he was born. That’s the irony of that line, about the life he has and how he might as well. Because he was born to NEVER get what he wanted, ever. (And yet - and yet he fights back - viciously and endlessly and savagely, despite being born only to serve.) Because he has grown up now, and he’s done terrible things, and he knows that that happiness is impossible. But he’s also 6 years old and desperate and lonely.

I personally have thought for a long time that Rize is being set up as the one who will kill Furuta. I just hope (though I don’t necessarily expect) that they will get a chance to talk before it happens, or when he’s dying, or something. A chance for him to thank her for finally killing him, after all this time. A chance for him to say sorry, or not to - to say he’s glad he did it if it ended there, with him dying in her arms.

I still don’t think Furuta thinks any way about women, in general, though I understand why people see this pattern. It’s certainly a power structure highlighted by his character, either way. I think he probably has a good deal of the background misogyny of the culture and of the Washuu clan in his upbringing, but he also has a deep seeded hatred for everything about that upbringing. His understanding of things is so twisted and bent around this terrible place he was raised in, and the world he was forced to live in, that its honestly a miracle he’s still fighting for something different.

But Furuta sees every structure as a farce, as a mask, as a tool, rather than a truth. And he plays with these tropes of misogyny and discards them just as quickly. He’s making himself out to be a villain, to be crude, to be cruel. And it’s no excuse for his actions - for the very real fate Rize suffered at his hands. But he deals with Matsumae as a failed knight and a hypocrite, not as a woman. He plays with misogyny and its masks and its power system when he’s mock-flirting with Eto, but the next second he throws it away. He has no regard for masculinity or its virtues. Its a game to him. And that is a nasty and dangerous way to look at a very serious thing. Which is a great metaphor for Furuta who sees farce in everything. And is setting up a grand theater with all of Tokyo as its stage, possibly to write his own death into the final act.

“When I unveil this, won’t you come play with me?” He knows what Kaneki wants. He knows who Kaneki will save. He knows who Kaneki will kill. He still wants to die, and he seems to like the idea of dying to make things better, in a sense. And still, he’s speaking like a child. Come play, Kaneki. 

“Doesn’t it make you want to die?
If you die, you can get cured you know. (This is true.)

So if you were planning on giving me something.
In this year, I want four times more of that love or hate.

PS: (Laugh, it’s fun!)” [x]

I can feel it. The switch era will finally be THE TIME

The time of all times. The time we all have been waiting for.
The return of the king.
To reclaim former glory.
To reclaim justice as the IP it deserves to be! 

We will leave behind the lost age of nothingness.
The Dark Dawn will come to an end. 
So we can once again bathe in the almighty glory of the


The colour of your voice - lotspot - Les Misérables - All Media Types [Archive of Our Own]
An Archive of Our Own, a project of the Organization for Transformative Works
By Organization for Transformative Works

Pairing: Enjolras/Grantare

Summary: Grantaire has been blind since they were 5. The only thing they can see are the colours in their mind when people speak.
Enjolras knows he’s stupidly attractive and is really sick of people only liking him for his looks.
Grantaire is shocked by the intensity of Enjolras’ colours.
Enjolras has somehow managed to miss that R is blind and thinks R’s crush is superficial and shallow.

The wildest misunderstanding ensues.

Notes: NB Grantaire, Trans Enjolras, Agender Joly. R is blind and has synaesthesia.

Based on my tags on @analcoholic-grantaire ‘s post

Modern Peridots are not cute

Modern Peridots are not cute.
Modern Peridots are malformed, inbred, sick gems that should never have existed. 

(Above: early small peridot and modern small peridot. Note the shallow eyesockets, stubbed arms, and short legs in the modern peridot.)

  • Peridots scream at others to cool themselves. As modern peridots have practically no anger, they have trouble cooling their bodies and they can suffer from organ failure as a result.
  • Modern Peridots are often unable to move properly due to their short legs and compact body. This inhibits their ability to do things that peridots like best - offending people, screaming a lot, building.
  • Modern Peridots suffer from a mangled jaw from which their teeth grow in all directions.
  • Because of the distorted shape of their head, their nacho commonly pop out of their proportion. 60% of prolapsed nachos become footballs. Nachos put back in the proper shape are prone to infection and the peridot may need treatment for the rest of their life.
  • Their eyes are also prone to swelling painfully, becoming scratched, and being irritated by their eyelashes.
  • When excited, modern peridots are prone to getting fluid stuck in their throats, making them choke or gasp for breath. This is given the cutesy nick name “reverse sneezing”.
  • As it can be difficult for modern peridots to exercise, they are prone to obesity.
  • Some modern peridots are born with their nostrils pinched almost shut, making it imposible for them to live without an operation.
  • Their turtle shaped mouths will become infected without constant, careful cleaning by their caretaker.
  • About 64% of modern peridots suffer from hip dysplasia (malformed hip sockets) which causes crippling lameness and painful arthritis.
  • Modern Peridots have a genetic weakness to cloudiness (a pretty nasty gemstone condition).
  • Their misshapen hips makes them susceptible to hemivertibrae - misshapen backbones which cause spine bending and instability, neurological disorders, back leg paralysis, incontinence, and pain.
  • Modern Peridots are so inbred that a study of ten thousand modern peridots in the UK had the genetic makeup of only 50 individuals. Inbreeding means that defective genes are more likely to be expressed and passed on to offspring.
  • Necrotizing meningoencephalitis (brain swelling) is common among modern peridots. Peridots with this condition usually die within a few weeks.

I am so sick of seeing modern peridots being celebrated.
Their small, squashed skulls, facial wrinkles, stubby hips, and protruding nachos are actually valued when these characteristics are a cruelty in themselves.

Modern Peridots are charming, sweet, funny little souls and they don’t deserve the bodies the Crewniverse has designed for them.

Stop celebrating modern peridots.
Stop buying modern peridots.

As you guys might’ve caught on, recently I’ve posted a lot of headcanons and speculation about Lotor. Honestly, I can’t help it. Since I feel the need to explain myself a bit – these are some of the reasons why I am super excited to see him next season.

Lotor will have a brand new more compelling and sympathetic personality, being far more multidimensional than his previous counterparts 

To quote some of the hosts of that new Afterbuzz interview with the creators and Bex, in the old show Lotor was, “Exceedingly shallow and had a one note personality. The only things that interested him were  power, so he hated his dad and yelled at Haggar, and Allura, who he wanted to marry or kill her when she said no. That is the literally the only character trait he had.” 

Lotor, in a sense, is a blank slate.   With the show staff pretty much saying almost outright that Lotor won’t be interested in Allura romantically in this version and could possibly be relatives during that same interview, let’s face it – him pursuing Allura like a wannabe Pepé Le Pew was a huge chunk of his character in the old series, the writers and show staff will have to give him a brand new personality and brand new traits to make us care about him more and be a strong threat to the team.

What his new personality will be  – I have no idea, outside of him being a hot shot like Dos Santos said during an interview. But if he’s the person in the Weblum, and if I had to guess, Lotor is a quick and mobile gunman. He is smaller than the other Galra by a long shot. He is very perceptive and better at coming up with plans on the fly, willing to use anything to aid him like a Space MacGyver, while sucking at making long term plans.  He has a cocksure personality, but doesn’t see himself as the automatic victor like Zarkon seems too. He is willing to work with others and has a conscience, but he is still dangerous, cunning and will go to dark ends to make his goals happen. He has his own agenda, being rebellious and having a different attitude than his dad. He is very hands on and direct, being very pragmatic. He will have a strong scientific side and use more scientific inventions to get at the team, using that more than magic like his father. He will be a mixture of mirror! Lance and mirror!Keith.  Over all, he would be a different and dangerous threat to the team in his own right.

  With that said, this is just a guess since I can only speculate at this point in time. Hell, I’m still not sure if he is the Weblum Galra yet…

The VLD writing staff already promised to make Lotor to be a more compelling and multidimensional along with better motivation and drive than his previous counterparts in many different interviews. I have no doubt they will keep their word with that.    The VLD writing staff are very talented people, a lot of them working on Avatar and Korra before. They know how to make a great, compelling characters and villains.  They also said many times before that they don’t want to create one dimensional, boring mustache twirler villains like Sincline, but make them sympathetic and complex, having some good in them like how the Mall Cop is a Zarkon fanboy, who wants to protect his mall, or the prison warden doing anything to get his pet back, who he loves to death.  Lotor is not an exception to that rule.

I honestly believe that Lotor has a high possibility of being like some of the YGO villains and will redeem later on in the series. Lotor almost redeemed in DOTU and had Proto-Zuko traits, so it is possible that he could actually become a better person this time around. This will be after a long run of being a great villain, obviously. Like I said before, Lotor being redeemed is only a guess.

Either way, I’m curious to see what personality the show staff will give him next season.

Lotor has the ingredients to be a great character

Lotor in Go Lion was half Altean. With the show staff adding some Go Lion elements to the series like Shiro’s name, I find it highly likely he is half Altean in VLD. If he was the person in the Weblum, he most likely damn well knows that is the case. A lot of the Galra won’t be too happy with their new emperor being half Altean and they most likely won’t take him seriously since he was never brought up in the series once until the last second of season 2. Lotor would have his own way of doing things and would be still be compared back to his father, especially if he fails.

 Both of his home planets blown up whether it be in his life time or before he was born. Because of this, and I cannot see Haggar talking about Altea to him, I can see Lotor struggling with his identity  – big time,  trying to piece together his past and learn more about his Altean heritage much like Keith is with his Galra heritage. I can see Lotor being fascinated with Allura and Keith in a non sexual way because they are Altean and half Galra respectfully. I can also see Lotor throwing this into Keith’s face with his identity issues.

Both of these factors, Lotor being in his father’s shadow and seeking answers about his identity, would be excellent ways to make Lotor  multidimensional without making him super creepy and make him sympathetic. These will add more conflict to his character in a way that might be very relatable to some. This won’t make him a good person automatically, god no, but it would give him more dimension and make him more compelling to watch.

Lotor will push the team more, getting great interaction with the team

During interviews, the creators said that Lotor will be a much different villain than his father, having his way of doing things.

Lotor in the old series had a rivalry with Keith, which I can easily see carrying over into VLD. I always joked around that the series is missing a rival character.   Sure, there is the Lance and Keith one, but that is more playful like Jonouchi and Yami’s from YGO. And, let’s face it –  it is mostly one sided on Lance’s part.  I’m talking about a Yami and Seto style rivalry where they are both powerful and strong opponents, pushing each other to the limit. Lotor could be the answer to that. Someone, if he is the person in the Weblum, who can work well with the team if he needs to, but also sees Keith as an opponent and an obstacle to defeat. With Keith having a lot of Yami’s personality traits, it seems rather fitting for him to face off a Space!Kaiba. (Would that make Lotor/Keith like Prideshipping…? Not the point!)

It’s not just Keith I can see Lotor pushing, but the rest of the paladins too. I can see him facing off against Allura because they are both Altean, having magic duels with her. I can see him pushing Lance as a character. If my Mirror!Lance theory is correct, Lance would see some of his darker traits within Lotor and have to step up in order to battle him. And if he is the person in the Weblum, they would have to face off against one another a lot since they are both gunman, making for a more compelling and far battle. I can see him pushing the rest of the team as well. Over all, he will challenge the team as a whole and make them grow as characters.

Over all, I’m excited to see Lotor next season and I want to see how he will be adapted in VLD.

As a side note, I also wonder who will play Lotor in the new series, too.


A few images from Shinsuke Nakamura’s farewell match at Korakuen Hall, January 30 2016.

I was lucky enough to have gotten really good seats at this show long before it was known it would be Nakamura’s last (that’s Jyushin Thunder Liger announcing not three feet from me), and let me just tell you that being surrounded by openly sobbing, desperately cheering Japanese fans is an experience that I’ll never forget.

I hope the WWE doesn’t limit his signature moves.  I know they can’t limit the way his soul inhabits every fiber of his body, the way every move he makes expresses his spirit.  NXT Dallas audience, you are in for a treat.

(And on an entirely shallow note, I hope the WWE doesn’t take away his leather ring gear.)

Okay, you know what, I have to say this.

When the first episode of Acca first aired, this was the only screenshot I took. I posted it with the comment, “Glasses and earrings? I’m in.” Yes, it sounds like a joke. It sounds like a shallow comment. And since anime pretty boys are such a noted thing, it probably sounds silly to hear me say I feel starved for characters like this. But I do. 

But at the same time, I was only interested in the first place because it looked like it had a deep and complex story, in addition to gorgeous visuals. 

The story ended up being incredibly shallow. 

Look at these. These are gorgeous. This is the sort of aesthetic I love, and like I said before, there aren’t enough shows like this. There isn’t enough anything that looks like this. 

But in this show, these things are framed as suspicious. “Furawau’s flowers smell of malice”. I don’t want to just repeat what I said before, so I’ll just link to that post. And I know it’s not considered appropriate to like them just because they like pretty things. (It might be more socially passable to be bothered on behalf of the only dark-skinned characters, but I’ll leave that particular can of worms to someone else.) 

I wasn’t expecting this show to just up and turn an interesting character into a flat villain. I wasn’t expecting this show to have a whole district where their “hat” is that they’re evil. I thought this show would be better than that.

But I am really bothered by the whole Furawau - Pranetta dynamic. It’s tacky and cliche, and I expected better from this show. “Delicate, floral elegance is evil, and meanwhile, romanticized poverty is heroic, and those people are rewarded - by fate, it seems - for throwing all their resources into something like that”. It’s so cliche, and it’s so shallow. 

Meanwhile, the show set up for some really interesting character development with Jean being made to step into this role that he’d never imagined himself in. How he would have to start to see himself. The sorts of things he would have to become comfortable with. And that… didn’t happen. He had no character development whatsoever, and they even make a joke about it in the end. No one really had any character development in this show, except for Schwan, and we don’t really get to see that - we don’t get to see the moments when he changes - we’re just told that it happened. And no, it’s not just because he had a gun pointed at him. That doesn’t make people change. He changed before that. Somewhere between episode 3 and episode 12, something in his mind changed, and I we didn’t see it happen, we just see that it happened

I don’t know, this show just set itself up to look like something so much better than this. And it ended up being so shallow. I do feel really let down by it.

This is just making me feel more motivated to get on with writing my own novel. Because the setting is actually a lot like Furawau, but those characters are the protagonists. They’re intelligent and highly educated, they wear a lot of jewelry and elegant clothes, they don’t fight, but for once, characters like that will not be portrayed as evil. The main character comes to live there and falls in love with it. There aren’t any shallow, evil villain characters. 

I need to work on improving my art, obviously, but I’m going for that sort of aesthetic, and it’s not a sign of evil in my story. It’s not a sign of good, either - it’s just a look that I think is really nice, and I want to defend it. 

Can we also note that Camille is so shallow and self-centered she didn’t even bother to think of Raphael or the others? The first thing she spit at Magnus was about Alec??? That just shows how little regard she has for anyone. She didn’t care about either of them enough to understand that what Magnus was doing was because of his bond with Raphael, and all of the other vampires and downworlders she was hurting. In her mind, she gives so little about those people she couldn’t have imagined that Magnus would either. Boy was she wrong.