old-fart

somehow i churned this out super last minute in one day i felt like i was possessed in the last hours of doing this

decided to get two birds with one stone because apparently england and shakespeare share a birthday!! i only had the energy to represent 4 of shakespeare’s plays here and they should be easy to recognize… i think…

My best m8 (and #1 d.va fan), @geraltsbooty, leveled up today! Pls go wish him a happy birthday and maybe give him a follow too, bc he is the bee’s knees ♥ 

[please do not save, edit, repost, or use my art in any way / please do not delete caption]

Coran HC

★  I don’t care what anyone says, he was the previous Blue paladin

  • Have you seen his reflexes??? Look at those and tell me he wasn’t a paladin

★ HE WAS IN A RELATIONSHIP WITH ALFOR AND THE QUEEN FIGHT ME

  • This makes him the perfect person for Allura to come to for Matt and Shiro

★ Every time he sees Keith he gets reminded of his edgy phase

★ He’s able to make any species love him
  • It’s a gift

★ On a dare he ran through those boiling rocks that fell from the sky on Altea and somehow made it through without a scratch???

★ The first batch of nunvil he made was actually made from sweaty clothes to “test” the paladins

  • Nobody knows, It’s a secret he’ll take to his grave

★ Is one of the biggest pranksters ever

He and Keith get stranded of some random planet: Hmm… Delectable tea or deadly poison?

★ Nobody has ever seen him go to sleep

  • Does he need sleep? Nobody knows

★ Covered in badass scars because y e s

★ Can and will beat you up while giving you a lecture on safety

★ The reason the red lion didn’t let him in is cause he pulled a prank on her once and she holds a grudge

★ Was the mom friend of the old paladins

★ His hair was as long as Allura’s at one point but during a mission it got cut off

  • All the paladins cried for his loss, even Zarkon shed a few tears

★ Lance is his favorite without a doubt but he loves all the other paladins as well

  • They all bond over different things it’s great

★ They went on a planet with tiny creatures and they follows him around the entire time they were there

★ Has like no idea of how self-preservation works

  • That alien has razor sharp teeth and is like 10xs his size? Must be friendly

★ Sometimes he just makes up some random creatures to mess with the Paladins

★ He somewhat drugged Allura and Shiro once so they could go tf to sleep

★ He somehow got his mustache stuck in some doors once

  • No one lets him live it down

★ Has at least 20 different types of poison up his sleeve “just in case”

★ He still chills with Blue in his very little free time

2

It’s my birthday!!! Surprise! Lol Im 38. Go ahead… Mmhmmmm. I’ve heard all the old fart jokes today lmao lmao…

Story time… Left is day 1 vs right of day 355, today, of my weight loss journey. Shirt 4xl to 2xl. Well some rare brands are still 3x. Pants/slacks 62 to 46. Belt 64 to 48. No confidence, depressed, tired, bleek… Vs… shit loads of confidence I never knew I had, mostly happy Lol (damn job), energetic, and hopeful for the future. And it wasn’t all rainbows and sunshine and unicorn glitter farts; It all wasn’t always a downwards trend. It wasn’t tear free. It wasn’t stress free. I had gains too. Points where I wanted to just give up. Quit. Just stop. No one cares. Why bother!

Point is… Don’t stop. Don’t give up. And that’s right, no one cares! Be honest with yourself. No one cares. The only 1 that should care about you is YOU! Dont live, feed off of others. Do your own thing! And.. So what if you have a 2+lb gain this week. The weight loss journey is like driving on the interstate. You’ll make up for lost time… Just kick it into over drive now or later after a little break. You WILL get there. I’m proof of that. Just believe in yourself. Give yourself mini goals. And 1 realistic major goal. My 1 year was -100lbs. Obviously, I passed that! -138!!!! Just… 1-2 pounds a week. That’s all. The rest will follow. Do it on you own time. Your own goals. Your own rules. Don’t be an expert. I’m not an expert. Never stop learning. Play with your body. Learn. Explore yourself. Try new things. You will be great at it. Trust me! Just believe in yourself. Accept your flaws. Keep moving forward! Like the Marines say, “embrace​ the suck, and keep fucking moving!”

I’m gonna have some chocolate cake… Because I can! *Cheesey smile* 😛 y'all have a great night! Muah 🍀😘😜♥️

3

Chen Birthday Countdown: Jongbae

& happy birthday to su-lay 

So I heard it was a special somebody’s birthday today! (ok, I may be a tad late but I tried haha) I hope you had a fantastic day, Jack! I’m so proud of you for all of your hard work and dedication. You’re inspiring! Best wishes to you!!

5

Christ, no wonder Andrew turned out so utterly unappealing.

He’s got a handsome face, sure, but nothing else about him can be called attractive at all.

No thanks to his Mr. Stick-up-his-ass-statesman for a father who’s trying to make his son as boring as him.

Also, what is with this backwards thinking? No decent parent I know would ever say no to their children becoming more well-rounded, and on their own accord, too.