He politely pulled my chair back for me. I smiled as I sat down, and he pushed me closer to the dining room table. Everything was perfect. My hours of cooking had paid off; the Alfredo pasta and filet mignon were flawlessly prepared, accompanied by twin glasses of red wine.
My date settled down across from me. “You’ve really outdone yourself. This looks fantastic, better than a restaurant could’ve done.”
I laughed lightly. “And all in the comfort of home. You said you were a wine guy, right?”
“Absolutely. Honestly, you’re embarrassing me now. My past two two dates with you didn’t come close to matching what you’ve done for me. I have to up my game.”
“I suppose so,” I agreed. There wouldn’t be a fourth date.
The jingling bells of my ringtone began to sound, and I quickly took my cell out my pocket. The name that popped up sent a wave of irritation through me. “I’m so sorry, can I take this? My younger sister just got surgery, and my mom’s taking care of her.”
“Absolutely,” he said.
“Feel free to start without me, maybe try the wine. I have a different bottle, and I wasn’t sure if you’d like this one,” I directed as I walked out of the room.
Once I was out of hearing distance, I answered my call. “I’m almost done, and nothing has went wrong. Have some faith. Come in twenty minutes,” I hissed, hanging up before the person on the other line could even speak.
I returned to see him sipping his glass. “She wanted to buy my little sister her favorite candy and couldn’t remember the name. I thought it was an emergency.”
He chuckled. “Moms will be moms. I love the wine by the way. You have good taste.”
“Thank you,” I said as I sat down again. He would start feeling the effects within a couple of minutes.
I took a longer drink from my own glass. Dealing with my annoying boss later was less painful when buzzed. He and I dug into our food, enjoying light chatter. As I was twirling noodles around my fork, I began to feel lightheaded. It was if my thoughts were being bounced around between thick clouds, not able to form completely. My vision blurred, and I dropped the utensil. It clattered against the plate.
“Are you okay?” he asked.
“Yeah, my head just hurts abit. I have advil in the bathroom; I’ll be right back.” I excused myself, but the act of standing up sent a wave of nausea through my stomach. Forging on, I desperately tried to balance on unsteady legs.
Suddenly, I felt a hand on my shoulder. My date gently spun me around to face him, and he gave me a sweet yet patronizing smile. My feet tingled, growing numb. I couldn’t support my own weight and pitched forward. He caught me, picking me up bridal style. I was too weak to struggle, and I could barely comprehend his next words as he walked through my house towards the back door.
“First rule to poisoning someone, honey: don’t leave your victim alone with what you spiked. Your glasses might just get switched.”
Fed up of being cooped in the bunker- not allowed to Hunt. You take action.
Midnight. It was midnight. Normally, Dean was still up at this time. Sometimes you with him, both talking about nonsense or sat in comfortable silence. But this night he went to bed as early as Sam. You realised they would be upset with you for being in a mood, but dammit you had every right to be. You sighed and decided it was time to take action.
You took your emergency backpack out from under your bed. You’d had one packed a few years now full of necessities and hunting material. ‘This is incase anything ever happens’ You remember telling yourself You slung it over your shoulders and waited.
You waited to make sure no one was in fact awake and you waited to try and talk yourself out of it. But, the more you tried the more you wanted to go. You weren’t running away and you weren’t doing anything stupid. It was a simple salt and burn and hell, you were prepared.
At 12:30am you moved out of your room and into the main section of the Bunker. You paused in the middle of the war room to check for movement but nothing happened. After making sure, you climbed the steps. Every footstep increased the tension as you became closer and closer to leaving. It wasn’t the leaving part that was worrying you, but your brothers reaction. Not to mention Mary.
When you reached the door it took every bit of willpower in your body not to turn around. If you did then you might never go on this hunt. Your hand clasped around the handle and you slowly creaked it open. “Be back soon, bud.” You whispered, patting the bunker’s walls before exiting the building and closing the door behind you.
You were out.
Now to grab the car and go.
Of course you weren’t going to take Baby, Dean would never forgive you. So instead you took the other car that was out there. It was a 1962 Mercury Monterey, Dean’s favourite in the garage. You took the keys out of your pocket which you’d stolen from Dean earlier. Well, they were in his bedside table but something told you he wouldn’t notice.
“Let’s do this.” You smirked, slipping in the front seat. Thankfully you’d already turned 17 so Dean taught you to drive- not that you got much further than Kansas. You made sure you were far away from the Bunker before blasting your music loud. The case was in Nebraska so not too far away. You didn’t stop driving all night and partly into the morning until you reached your destination.After booking into the Motel, you presumed you’d have about 24 hours until your brothers find you. It would have been longer, but you took their car which means they know the number plate. 24 hours was more than enough.
“Okay thank you very much Mrs Lock,” You smiled at the victim’s mother, trying not to look to uncomfortable in your stupid suit. “Please call me if anything else comes to mind.” You added before turning around to leave.
You paused and turned to look, Mrs Lock hadn’t exactly given you anything to go on yet. “Yes?” You encouraged, wanting more. “I know it sounds stupid but….the man I saw I thought,” She stopped and shook her head. “No nevermind. It’s silly.” “Go on, anything you can remember is very helpful. Real or not. It all gives us an idea of who…or what…we’re dealing with.” “Well okay. I could have sworn he was….see-through.” “See-through?” You echoed. At least that confirmed your suspicions. “Yes. I know it’s probably codswallop but I saw…something.” “You’ve been very helpful. Thank you.”
You climbed into the car, happy to know it was definitely a spirit. Vengeful by the sounds of it. It had killed a 13 year old girl and is claimed to have looked like her step-dad who died a few years back because of a car crash.
You decided to stop off at the local Church where he was buried “Christopher Lock.”. You scanned the gravestones for ‘LOCK’, armed with a ready-loaded shotgun, shovel, salt and a lighter.
A cold breeze dropped the temperature, sending a chill up your spine. However when nothing happened you put your things down and began to dig at CHRISTOPHER LOCK’S grave. You hadn’t done this before so now was the time to discover it was incredibly tiring and very time-consuming.
You dug your shovel into the dirt, but with every load you tossed to the side more seemed to fill the gap. However, you were determined and persevered.
When you were finally almsot finished, with a few corners of the coffin poking through the soil, you paused for a quick break. Your hands were cramping and your back ached. Taking in a deep breath, you noticed it came out as a cold mist, this was all just like before when Mary took you on that hunt. Only that time the ghost had appeared by now…unless it was occupied with another victim. You strained your ears and grabbed your shotgun. A cry for help made you clamber out of the grave and sprint over to where the noise was coming from. It was inside a large shed-like building, which must have been where the grounds keeper kept his things.
You held up the gun, aiming it straight ahead and taking sharp movements as you scanned the building. It was reasonably big, but you could see everything inside from where you were. In front of you was a translucent tall man with a bloody and burnt body, his cothes ripped with an ashen finished. You didn’t have time to take in the two people he was attacking and took a shot. It disappeared into a cloud of mist, the gunshot still ringing in your ears. You staggered backwards slightly from the recoil, but remained standing stiffly. Lowering your firearm, you realised who they were.
Your brothers were staring at you with both shock and disappointment. Dean had a stiff jaw and flared nostrils. Sam got up from where he’d fallen, not sure whether to speak or not. Sam might have been older than you, but Dean was the eldest and you both had to respect that whether you liked it or not. Sam looked equally pissed off, but at least he wasn’t on the verge of exploding, unlike Dean.
You waited, shifting awkwardly. Dean didn’t take his cold and stern eyes off you.
“Where’s he buried?” Dean demanded. You stuttered, surprised that’s what he wanted to know above everything else “Uhm…J-just outside…” You managed, not sure whether to turn to lead the way or wait. He kept his poker face as he stormed past you. Sam waited for you to follow on before exiting the building. You just wanted to do one thing without your brothers being there to do it for you.
Dean picked up your shovel and continued to dig. Sam picked up the salt and lighter, waiting for the bones to be accessible. “Leave the gun and get in the car.” Dean ordered, determined to finish the case before getting into a fight. Every instinct you had told you to do as he told you to, but there you were not moving. “I said get in the car!” Dean barked, his voice boomed over the otherwise silence. Again you did nothing. You were too scared to say no, but too stubborn to actually do what he wanted.
“Y/N…” Sam sighed, trying to go for a more calmer approach “Just get int he car, okay?” You understood that Sam didn’t want to deal with anymore conflict, but this wasn’t his decision to make. “You’re not Dad.” You glared at Dean.
Dean stopped, his hands hovering over the lid of the coffin.
“Don’t you think I know that!” he snapped.
“Do you?” You scowled “Because it looks to me like your still trying to copy every damn thing he’s ever done.”
“You shut your mouth!”
“Or what? Are you going to hit me?”You slung the shotgun over your back. “Fuck the pair of you.”
Sam and Dean watched you walk away from them, both in pure shock as they took in the words you’d said.
You sat in the front of Baby next to Sam. Dean drove the Mercury back. Sam insisted that he was the one to be with you because of Dean’s…”temper”.
It was silence for Sam, who glanced worriedly at you from time to time. You looked out of the window, headphones in and volume up. You didn’t know what to say, you were furious that they didn’t even thank you for saving their asses. You were angry they hadn’t let you hunt yet. You couldn’t believe that after seventeen years on this dumb planet you were still being treated like a newborn.
About halfway into the journey, Sam tapped your shoulder, making you take an earbud out. “Yeah.” You mumbled, not wanting to look him in the eye. You wanted to be angry at Sam, but it was hard when he hadn’t given you as much of a reason. Both your brothers hadn’t wanted to introduce you into hunting, but Dean seemed a lot more protective about it.
“Here.” His vagueness forced you to look up, he had the audio cord in his hand. You took it, taking your headphones out and putting it in. Before un-pausing your music, you whispered a “Thanks, Sammy.” “No prob, sis.” He offered a tight smile.
Dean’s voice boomed through the halls of the bunker: “What the hell were you thinking?!”
“I’m not the one getting my ass kicked by a ghost.” You remarked, noticing Mary had come to see what was going on.
“Don’t you speak to me like that!” Dean hissed.
“Dean calm down.” Sam put a hand out in attempt to do so.
“No, Sam! I won’t calm down because my stupid sister doesn’t seem to realise how dangerous what she just did was!”
“Of course it’s dangerous it’s hunting!” You shouted back, trying not to let tears form in your eyes. Dean continued off your point “Which you shouldn’t be doing!” “Why not? I didn’t realise you were in charge of my life!” “You’re going to go hunt when we say you can.” “You don’t get to decide what I do with my life!”
“HEY!” Mary shouted, making the three of youstop. “Dean, go to your room.” Dean frowned “Excuse me?” “You heard me.” Mary folded her arms over her chest, taking a stand. Dean gave you a glare before storming down the corridor.
You stood in shock, had Mary actually just asked him to do that? “Y/N, stop shouting at him he won’t listen when he’s mad no matter how loud you are.” She scolded, starting to lightly pace around the room. You raised an eyebrow at her…who’s side was she on? “Okay…?” “You were stupid,” She turned to you “You were reckless, and you scared us all to death. So don’t you ever think you have the right to walk out of this bunker without one of us knowing about it.”
“Mom’s right. You can’t just go hunting when you feel like it, Y/N.” Sam added.
“Well it’s not like you or Dean are gonna take me any time soon!” You protested. “Y/N..” Sam sighed “We didn’t know you were this serious about Hunting.”
“Probably because you never bothered asking.” You rolled your eyes, folding your arms over your chest. “You can just talk to us.” You realised at this point that Sam wasn’t telling you off but asking you to tell the truth.
Mary stepped back in to the conversation “No one here has the right to tell you what to do with your life. So if you want to hunt then that’s okay. I’ve seen you Hunt and you’re good-” “What?” Sam’s eyes widened. “She’s seventeen, Sam. I took her on a few salt and burns that’s all. When Dean has calmed down, you’re going to say sorry to him.” “But-” You wanted to protest, only she didn’t give you the chance. “Am I making myself clear?” You sighed. “Yeah I guess.” “Good. I’ll go get dinner.” With that she turned and left, leaving you alone with Sam.
You didn’t know what to say or what to do. You were still angry, but if felt like Mary had put some force field around you meaning you couldn’t be. Sam sat down on the table, his feet still able to touch the floor somehow. He patted next to him, gesturing for you to sit down as well. You did, your feet swinging in the air.
Sam wrapped an arm around you, hugging you tightly against his chest. You both sat in silence for quite some time. Neither wanting to move.
“You know,” Sam lightly cleared his throat “Dean wanted to be the first person to take you on a hunt.” “When we found out we had a sister he was so excited to be an older brother again- not that he’d admit it.” You smiled a little “Then you found out about hunting and he wanted to make sure you were so prepared it was almost impossible for you to fail at it.” “So why doesn’t he want me to hunt?” You asked, desperate for an actual answer. “It’s not that he…we don’t want you to. It’s that we want you to do whatever it is that you want to do.” “But I want to hunt.” You said it like it were obvious. “We didn’t know.” “I’ve been training.” You explained “Mary helped me a little.” “Why didn’t you tell us?” Sam sounded hurt which made you feel guilty. “I thought you’d be angry. I thought you wanted me to go have one of those stupid apple pie lives.” You scoffed at the thought.
“I’m sorry, Y/N. We should have realised.” “Is that why Dean’s so angry?”
“He just doesn’t want you to get hurt. He doesn’t want to be like…like Dad. He’s scared, Y/N. He’s scared he’s going to do it wrong.” “He won’t.” You assured him despite his absence. “You try telling him that.” Sam scoffed.
“I will.” You smirked, “Just you watch.”
You glanced up when you heard footsteps, making your smile fall into a curious glance. Dean turned the corner, his face was softer as he moved over. He sat down next to you so you were in between your brothers. “I’m sorry, kid.”
“Me too, De.”
“We should have let you hunt by now, I’ve been selfish. There’s me knowing your all safe at home while me and Sam are out ganking monsters, never thinking of it the other way round. Hell, you don’t even know if we’re gonna come back sometimes. I guess I’ve always known real deep down you wanted to hunt.”
You didn’t know what to say so you just pulled him into a hug. Dean hugged back. pressing a kiss to your forehead. “Does this mean I can hunt?” You asked, giving him your best puppy-dog eyes
“Don’t give me that look,” Dean rolled his eyes “Yes. But you’re not hunting alone.”
“I won’t.” You promised.
“And you do as I say.”
“I might.” You smirked, making him chuckle.
“Does this mean I get to ride shotgun?”
“Don’t push it.” Sam nudged your side playfully.
“Can I pick the music?”
Dean looked mortally offended “He said don’t push it.”
-A shy and clingy Omega being dragged to a party by their Alpha but it’s crowded and stressful so the Alpha ends up carrying their somewhat grouchy mate around while trying not to pay too much attention to the nose brushing against their neck, seeking comfort from the Alpha’s scent
-An extroverted Alpha that has finally convinced their introverted Omega friend to go on a date with them and they are so excited so they take the Omega to their favorite place, a very loud and busy restaurant that the Alpha adores because it feeds their need to interact and be around people. However, after chattering non stop for a while the Alpha finally notices how uncomfortable the Omega looks and how they shy away a bit whenever someone passes too closely to their table, feeling a bit guilty for not noticing sooner the Alpha makes up a reason to leave and they go somewhere quieter with less people. Despite the Alpha’s denial, the Omega knows they did it for their sake and they feel so content and cared for and they know they picked a good Alpha
-An extroverted Alpha trying to do something special for their less than social mate so they tell the Omega they can pick anywhere they want to go, the Alpha is only mildly surprised when the Omega’s eyes light up and they respond, “So we can go home and nap? Just the two of us?” but the Alpha isn’t really annoyed or anything because cuddles and sleepy kisses are their weakness
-An extremely introverted Omega that gets really anxious around people but they agree to go somewhere with a group of friends. The place they end up going to is really crowded and noisy and all the different scents in the air start stressing the Omega out so they instinctually clutch onto the arm of their Alpha best friend and squeeze tightly. The Alpha turns to question them about it but as soon as they notice their friend’s distress they are quick to wrap an arm around them and surround them with the Alpha’s own familiar and comforting scent, the Alpha is very social so they easily do all the talking for both of them until the Omega is calm and relaxed again…they still hold them close though…just to be sure everything is alright of course
-An introverted Omega constantly worrying that their extroverted Alpha will get tired of their antisocial tendencies and leave them behind, the Alpha eventually catching on and reassuring them that they could never lose interest in such an adorable little rain cloud of negativity, the Omega just going “never mind bye” and walking away while the Alpha laughs
-An extroverted Alpha taking their quiet and shy Omega drinking with friends and the Omega being mortified when the Alpha gets drunk and starts loudly discussing what the Omega is like in bed like, “Yeah you’d never know cuz he’s so quiet all the time but he’s a real screamer once we get goin-” and the Omega is blushing profusely as they instantly start dragging their drunk ass home and then they spend the next two weeks denying all the Alpha’s sexual advances as revenge
-An extroverted Alpha always feeling so accomplished when they find a social thing that their introverted Omega also enjoys, like concerts, low-key being all content about other people seeing how happy their Omega is because it makes them feel like a good Alpha
-An introverted Omega really not wanting to attend a party with their outgoing mate, so while they are supposed to be getting ready they instead do little things to distract the Alpha like exposing their throat or walking around without clothes…and when they end up fucking instead of attending the party the Omega has to accept the fact that they literally just seduced their Alpha to avoid having to socialize
-An Alpha having no luck convincing their Omega to go out and do something so they turn to the Omega’s sibling for help but they won’t help because, “If you guys stay here we can all do puzzles and doing puzzles doesn’t require going out and seeing people.” and the Alpha just gives up and joins them at the table to help with the puzzle
-An Alpha literally bribing their Omega to attend a family gathering like, “Okay okay, if you come with me tonight we can spend all day at home tomorrow eating garbage and doing nothing, we can do anything you want but my mother will murder me if we miss another dinner due to some random illness.” the Omega reluctantly agreeing…“Okay but I want tacos and ice cream for breakfast.”
I won’t have the results back for a few days, I think, but it went okay. Took way longer than I thought it would, though, huehueuhe. Got myself hooked up to a normal IV because they weren’t allowed to use my chest port – but that’s okay.
Had to drink myself a nice radioactive smoothie, too. The nurse asks me “what flavour would you like?” and I’m like “Radiation comes in flavours?”
Shoulda gotten banana.
Then I sat there and watched Zootopia on a pull-out screen until they were ready huehuehue also, that’s, like, 15oz of the stuff. Stung when I drank it.
(edit) The smoothie itself didn’t have radiation – the sugar they injected me with did. But I think it’s more fun that way.
“Daddy. Daddy.” Zoe said, running up to me. “Your home. What took you so long?”
“Been working overtime princess.” I said, picking her up and giving her a big hug. “Have you been being have yourself for fat Joe?” She nodded. “That’s good. Now where’s mommy at? Is she in the shower or something?”
“Nope.” Zoe said, shaking her head. “She’s in Carson’s office. With Danny and Travis.”
Summary: You found out your husband is cheating on you so you avoid him and send him to sleep in his office. Months later, just when you thought maybe you were being too cruel with him he goes and publishes The Reynolds Pamphlet.
Word count: 2,726
Time period: Hamiltime
Warnings: Mentions of cheating, angst.
Note: Okay, this really took longer than I thought and it ended differently of what I had planned initially but I liked it, so finally here it is the second (and last?) part! I really hope you enjoy it! ♡
You were used to going to bed and fall asleep without him. You were used to the almost inaudible sound of the quill serving as your lullaby. You were used to hearing the door of your room opening at some point in the middle of the night. But you weren’t used to the cold sensation of waking up alone… and you wondered if you would ever be.
108 mornings had passed since the last time he had woken up next to you with his arms firmly wrapped around your waist and his breath tickling softly against your neck. You didn’t count the days, but you did count the letters he left you every dawn in what used to be his side of the bed.
The first ones have been pleas for forgiveness, filled with regret and desperation. At letter number 34 they started being promises. Now they were love declarations, just like the ones he had written you long ago when he had courted you.
It was bittersweet to think about those times now. But you still remembered how he had looked at you when he met you for the first time; he couldn’t stop smiling and it was the most beautiful smile you had ever seen.
You sighed and took today’s letter. Like all the others, it was neatly folded and smoothly impregnated with violet scent; excitedly waiting to be open. So you did, you opened it and read it.
The words inside were what you expected them to be: the usual Good morning, followed by sweet nothings, he then proceeded to talk about his day and ask about yours. Just like a letter, you would send someone who is far apart from you. And the fact that you were actually far apart from each other when all that was between the two of you was a door was funny in a cruel way.
You finished your reading and folded the letter again to save it with the other 107 inside a small coffer. Not the one in which you had the letters from more than ten years ago, no, that one was almost sacred for you. You had another one just for this letters. At first, you had intended to throw away his apologies –the proof being the first seven letters that you totally crumpled– but there was no use, even after all these years you were still incapable of rejecting him.
You didn’t know if he had kept his word of not seeing that woman again but at least he had complied your demand; he didn’t bring her to your house anymore. That didn’t take the damage away, not the pain nor the tears, but it was something. At least you knew he really regretted it.
The clock struck a quarter past eight when you left your room and headed downstairs to make breakfast. It was still early but not early enough for your husband to still had not left to work, so finding him on the stairs; right in front of you, on his way up and you on your way down was surprising, to say the least.
You held your breath and he sighed with a little smile on his lips.
“That coral dress suits you magnificently, ” he said, looking at you adoringly.
You would be lying if you’d say he wasn’t capable of making butterflies flutter in your stomach anymore. But that wasn’t enough and you wouldn’t give him that satisfaction, so you continued in your way down without another word…. And he followed you, of course he did.
Once in the kitchen, you tried to ignore his presence, making more noise than necessary when placing the casserole and other things on the table and taking your time washing the vegetables, but his stare on every little move you did and his almost palpable nervousness made it impossible.
“Is there anything you need, Alexander?” you asked him suddenly “You are quite late for work today”
“I know, but I just couldn’t leave without talking to you first”
So now I am more important than your work? You thought bitterly, looking for the oats in the cupboard “The go ahead, I’m listening”
“No, (Y/N)…” he approached you and placed a slightly trembling hand on your shoulder, trying to catch your attention “I know I don’t deserve even a minute of your time, but I need you to really listen to me about this”
You took in a sharp breath at his closeness and squeezed your eyes shut in consideration, but finally nodded at his request, stepping away from him and turning around to look him in the eye “I am all expectation” you said, encouraging him to talk “but please don’t ever lay a hand on me again without my consent”
“Of course… I’m sorry. It won’t happen again” his voice was so small and broken it pained you, and it also reminded you why you had been avoiding him for more than three months.
“Philip will wake up in any minute so…” your tone was warmer this time, a subtle attempt to comfort him in any way “It will be better if you tell me now”
“(Y/N)…” he collected his thoughts and almost took your hands in his, before remembering what you had said not even a minute ago and dropped his hands at his sides awkwardly “I am not certain whether or not you had read my letters. If you had, I hope it counts as a sign that I still occupy a place in your heart for small it may be, a place I know I am unworthy of, but a place that I still long for more than anything else in this world.” It hurt you deeply to see him so doleful, so you tried to avert your gaze, but he pleaded you with his eyes not to do so and so your eyes stayed on his.
“I am not telling you this with the intention of asking for your forgiveness. Believe me, today less than ever is the appropriate timing. The only thing I am daring to ask for you is to never forget that I love you and to don’t ever doubt it. I know my actions don’t speak well of me and I am a reason for shame, but since the moment I saw you I knew you were my destiny, (Y/N), that you would be the mother of my children, my support, and my best friend, the one who would grow old with me–…”
“Alexander, stop” you implored fighting back tears.
“I’ll stop” he nodded “I’ll do whatever you tell me to do. But please, please (Y/N), promise me you won’t ever forget that I love you”
What are you going to do? Your eyes screamed and he seemed to openly ignore the question. Why are you telling me this? Why does it feel like a goodbye?
“If… if I promise you that, you must promise to me to don’t do anything stupid or reckless”
He gave you a sad smile and your heart almost stopped. You knew it was useless to ask him not to do something stupid but whatever it was this time, it had probably already happened and he was apologizing beforehand.
You turned your face away from his to look at the door, finding your daughter and elder son standing there.
“Sorry, she was hungry” Philip explained, apparently having noticed the tension “But we can come back later,” he said taking the little hand of his sister and leading her back to the living room.
“But I want my cookie now!”
“It’s alright, honey” you reassure him with a soft smile “I was just about to make breakfast”
The face of your little girl lightened up at your statement and soon the two of them were standing in front of you. You hug them, placing a chaste kiss on their foreheads “Good morning, did you sleep well?”
The four of you exchanged some words at the kitchen and then your husband left for work. None of you had made the promise to the other.
Your other son came down some minutes later and you ate calmly with your children. You took them to school, and when you came back the parlour-maid had already cleaned and tidied the reception room and living areas, making you realize that you were late.
“Good morning, Mrs. Hamilton” she greeted you when she noticed your presence “Is there anything I can do for you?”
“Oh, no, Grace, I was just lost in thought” you admitted “You did an excellent job as always, this room is impeccable”
She thanked you with a smile and you took your leave to your room.
You were anxious, nervous, and maybe even paranoid. What in the world had Alexander done? Or was he about to do it? Could you still be in time to do something to stop him? When you passed the market in your way home everyone had been muttering and throwing insistent glances in your direction so probably whatever it was had already happened but…
“Madame, are you alright?”
You stopped your train of thought and in your tracks too, because apparently you had been walking like a caged lion without realizing it.
“Charlotte…” you said with a sigh of relief at the sight of the housekeeper at your door “Please, tell me, have you listened to anything about a duel taking place today or something of the kind?”
“Mrs. Mcgrory had the impertinence to came here to talk to you about it, with the pamphlet in hand and all but I took the liberty of sending her away, knowing she is not in the best of terms with you Madame” she declared red in the face, apparently still agitated by the incident.
“What are you talking about?” you asked feeling your mouth dry and your heartbeat in your ears “A pamphlet? So there really was a duel? Is my Alexander alright?!”
“Please calm down, Madame, there was not duel” Charlotte assured you, placing her small and wrinkled hand on your shoulder, using the other one to tuck a lock of hair behind your ear, just like she used to do when you were younger. And just like on those old times you relaxed a little, feeling the air slowly returning to your lungs.
“Then what happened?”
She gave you a preoccupied look before she answered “Mr. Hamilton published something this morning” she explained “I thought you already knew, but I am not sure if it would be good for you to read it”
“I must read it” you declared “If you have a copy, please bring it to me”
“Of course, Madame,” she said stepping away “With your permission”
After that everything seemed to happen in slow motion but an incredibly fast speed at the same time.
The writing your husband had published was titled ‘The Reynolds Pamphlet’ and it explained with disgusting detail his affair with Maria Reynolds; the woman you saw that day at the staircase, the one he had swear not to see again, the one that helped Alexander to break your heart. And how she had approached him requesting his help and monetary aid but in the end ‘Some conversation ensued from which it was quickly apparent that other than pecuniary consolation would be acceptable’.
Every word you read felt like a stab and caused physical pain in your chest. Your tears ruined the paper in your trembling hands more than once and you had to take many pauses to fight your sobs, but somehow managed to get to the end of it. When you did, you finally let yourself fall apart. You cried your heart out, crumpling the paper till it was unreadable.
You burned it. You burned the Reynolds Pamphlet and all the letters Alexander had written you over the years; the 108 apologies, the few ones he had sent you that summer when you were at your father’s house, those he sent when he was fighting in the war, and… and even the ones of your youth, the ones that had made you fall madly in love with him.
You cried the whole time, watching the flames slowly consume the paper and the ink till there was nothing more than ashes and smoke. All the promises, all the sweet words, all the memories were gone, burning just like your very heart.
It was done. And you felt weak and numb. All he said in the morning… it was good you hadn’t made that promise because right now you wondered if he really knew what ‘love’ means in the first place. Someone who loves you doesn’t do things like this. Someone who loves you doesn’t cheat on you. Someone who loves you doesn’t make you wonder if you are still alive because you can’t feel your heart anymore.
You finally opened the door of your room only to find Charlotte there just about to knock, with concern drawn all over her face.
“I sent Grace to pick up the kids from school” she explained when you didn’t utter a word, “I thought you may be indisposed”
“Thank you…” you murmured with a sore voice, your eyes still red and glassy “I don’t want to look like this in front of them” you confessed “Philip probably already knows too and… I d-don’t…” you couldn’t help but cry again, lowering your head and trying to cover your eyes with your hand.
She hugged you firmly and you cried even more. Charlotte had been with you all your life, she was your nanny, then your lady’s maid, even your chaperone in your first dates with Alexander, now she was your housekeeper and you dared to say she had always been like your second mother.
“It afflicts me to seeing you like this, my girl,” she said “That young man has really messed up this time. If you allow me I’d like to share some words with him about it”
You only shook your head and held her closer “No, it won’t be necessary. But I need you to do something else for me”
“Anything for you, my dear”
“Please take good care of him,” you said with a small voice this time “Don’t let him skip meals or close himself up in the study for days on no end” you could feel her confusion at your words, so you explained yourself “I’m leaving with the kids to my father’s house”
The sky was pink when you left a neatly folded piece of paper on your side of the bed. Your sons and daughter were already waiting for you with their luggage in the carriage parked in front of the house. You gave the room a last glance and left.
… … … … … … …
If you are reading this it means that I am gone, so read it slowly.
I must admit I am so deeply torn between loving you with everything I have and drowning in the bitterness that this love is accompanied by.
My sister said to me once that love is like handing someone a gun, having them point it at your heart, and trusting them to never pull the trigger. But the thing is, Alexander, that you have pulled the trigger more than once and I am not sure if I have a heart anymore.
I believe that people have the right to make mistakes, but I also believe in the right that has the self to decide if it’s worth going ahead or not. And I don’t know if I will be able to forgive you this time. I don’t know if it will come to the day that I’ll trust you again, or in which I’ll feel safe by your side just like I used to feel an eternity ago.
I’m leaving you because I need to find myself and I need to forget you. I need to forget how much I loved you and how much I must hate you. I’m leaving you to punish you; to make you feel the absence you had left in me. I’m leaving you because to stay is to die and you are killing me, and I need to know if there is life after losing you.
One year. You’ve been gone for a whole 365 days and I’m still breathing. I’m still holding on. So to all of you that think you can’t live without that one person, that believe you won’t ever be able to move on, that think you will never be the same because of how they hurt you… I promise you, that’s not the truth. I thought I wouldn’t be okay after he left. I thought every night would be as bad as that first one when I slept alone, drowning in my own tears, wondering what went wrong. It’s tough and it takes time, lots of time, but the heart eventually heals. It took me a hell of a lot longer than it should have to get over that boy, but either way, I did it. And one year later, I’m celebrating the loss that I thought would completely destroy me, that actually turned out to be the thing that set me free.
I haven’t updated you ladies in a hot minute about what’s been going on in the hustle..for a few reasons such as bad juju after I made posts. The past few months have been hectic and I wasn’t hustling as hard BUT as of today I’m officially done with college a semester early yay! In any case, I’m going to tell ya’ll about this new POT and my day today. Lets call him Jet. Disclaimer: I ramble a lot in this post.
I met him on Tinder. Our first date was incredibly brief, but nice. I was in the city and we figured we would meet quickly over coffee. Today we met at the Plaza Hotel in NYC. A little bit about him he is Indian, just shy of 40, and works as an investment banker on Wall Street. He describes himself as going “all the way” because he hustled to get into the best school in India, finished in the top of his class, and then came to America to get his MBA at an ivy, and then now works in Wall Street. He was so kind and rich with compliments. At one point he grabs my hand and is like “What am I getting you for your graduation gift?” I laughed. “You’re putting me on the spot.” He tells me that I should think about what I want and the next time we see each other we will go shopping and he will get me my gift, “whatever I want”. He mentioned this over text too that I need to be gifted. (My tabs are open atm to LV I need a new wallet this is not a drill. I’m no longer shy about this shit I’m just going to say I need a new wallet, I’ve been wanting this one from LV it is $500 would that be okay?). He also does admission interviews for his alma matter and since I’m applying to law school he gave me A LOT of helpful tips on what admissions officers look for.
After the date we went to whole foods bc he thought I should have food for the train. I felt bad making him wait as I looked through all the cooked food and took my sweet time but he didn’t mind and after I got so much shit, basically went grocery shopping in this bitch he said, “That’s all? Are you sure?” I feel like the key is never to seem overly excited or in awe by their gestures. I just bat my lashes, smile and say “Thank you.” Like I feel like its easy to be in such awe when handed allowance for example but I think it’s best to give an appreciative smile say thanks and move on, almost unphased. Or to act like high class shit is normalcy. I got gifted a ring for Christmas that looks like an engagement ring I mean that’s basically what it is. When he complimented how “beautiful” my finger looked with my tattoo and the ring I looked at the ring, smiled, and said, “Oh this? It was a gift.” and moved on. I specifically wore that today so he knows I don’t play NO games *JoAnne voice*. I love to throw in a couple pieces in a simple outfit that just look classy. My three today were the diamond ring, this really dainty diamond necklace and this scarf from Saudi Arabia with a gold trim on the bottom. I was wearing a sweater dress, tights and thigh high boots. My whole outfit was like 30$ (minus my coat) but the added pieces just make you look like a subtle expensive bitch.
He did everything he could to just touch me or hold my hand towards the end of the date. Fixing my hair in the wind etc. I hate holding hands unless I’m like in love with a person, is that strange? I’m just so weird about being touched. So I had to bite my tongue when he said “Give me your hand” and played with my fingers and kissed my hand. He said “give me your hand” three times. He gave me “transportation cash” which was wellll over the cost of transportation which I was happy about. Shortly after we parted, he texted me compliments and that next time he’s not letting me leave so soon. He keeps texting how much he’s into me. His most recent text included “maybe some cuddles and kisses thrown in between too :)” I jump with glee when guys are bold with these statements because it gives me more incentive to be bold as fuck with opening my mouth and asking for things I want. “Cuddles and kisses” will surely come..when my bank account is happy. I used to be scared to ask for shit but bet Imma have this Louis wallet in 2 weeks time. Speaking that into existence LOL.
But definitley looking forward to where this goes. I love men who drool over you bc even though it can seem annoying or obsessive those are the ones who will give you what you want, so long as you keep them on their toes.
KIM MINSOEK’s book Forty Steps To Perky Nips was the winner of the 2010 Changmin Award for Best Workout. His other novels include Speaking Out, and Cute With Abs. He spends most of his time at the gym and searching for his lines in Exo.
In addition to the internationally acclaimed Listen To My Mix Tapes, PARK CHANYEOL is also the author of the best selling adventure Kyungsoo’s Revenge. Chanyeol lives in Seoul, South Korea, with his fellow band mates, where he spends his time annoying Kyungsoo and laughing at everything.
OH SEHUN is the New York Times bestselling author of Party Till The Sun Up: A Step From Down, From Noodle To Man, and Never Don’t Mind About A Thing. He spends his summers in Seoul, South Korea, where he drinks his choco bubble tea, and acts like a cat.
Byun Baekhyun’s first book Top 10 Best Eyeliner Tips, was 2012′s New York Times Bestseller. A fellow member of the popular boy band Exo, Baekhyun is also the editor of SM Entertainment’s Take Your Time, and Kim Jongin’s Chicken Tender Love.
In addition to China’s favorite Work and Work Harder, ZHANG YIXING is also the author of the tearjerker The Promise. Yixing alternates summers between Seoul, South Korea and his homeland in China. He helps warm the nations hearts as they all say, “PLEASE REST”.
KIM JONGIN is the author of several books, including his bestseller Chicken Tender Love and How To Teach Your Dog To Dance. He is a member of the boy band group Exo, but likes to spend his time with his 3 dogs and eating chicken.
KIM JONGDAE’s first book in the 50 Ways To Troll was winner of the 2013 Beagle Award for Popular Choice. His other novels include the WAEEE series and YAAAA. He spends most of his time beating others high notes.
DO KYUNGSOO is the author of several books, including the bestsellers Play Another Slow Jam, It’s Okay, It’s just Chanyeol,Am I Real or Just A Psychological Episode and Winning An Oscar. Kyungsoo spends his days in South Korea where he eats nachos and runs away from Chanyeol’s Hair dye.
KIM JUNMYEON is a single father, editor, and author of Divorced with 8 Kids. Junmyeon is also the bestselling author of I’ll Buy Your Love With Cash. He spends most of his time proving to his children he is funny and smiling brighter then our Sun.
Request: Hello! Are you still taking requests? If so can it be about the reader having a relationship with Grant Gustin for almost three years and decided to go on a trip to Greece(i’m from Greece that’s why) so he can learn about the reader’s culture and both of them have a surprise for each other(the reader is pregnant and Grant is proposing) plzzz!!
Notes: Okay this was really fun to write and sorry it took longer than expected but I hope you like it!!
Prompt: "That's disgusting. You're lucky you're cute" and Sam 😙
Prompts? (this ended up pretty Dean-heavy but it’s still about Sam so I hope it’s. Fine.)
Dean finds him too late. He’d turned around for just a few moments - well, he’d went to get a drink from the vending machine, really, but still - and Sam was just gone. Vanished into thin air. And that’s bad; he’s only four years old. John would kill him if Sam went missing, and worse, if something happened to him… Dean would never forgive himself for it. It’s not about John, even if John’s rage is the first thing he really thinks about. No, it’s worse. It gnaws at his insides when he looks for Sam everywhere. E-v-e-r-y-w-h-e-r-e. It’s pointless.
So, he finds him too late.
Sam’s fine, sure. As fine as a missing four-years-old can be. But he’s sitting in a puddle, and he’s gross. He’s gone all around the motel and while he’s probably lost, he hasn’t noticed it yet - he’s just fine, for now, in his own head. And Dean’s angry, he’s boiling over for a second, and all he wants to do is just slap his dumb brother on his chubby cheek and make him cry for making him worry so much, but he can’t. He’s not very good at being mean, really. So he just walks up to him and manhandles him up from the puddle, his clothes all dripping and his fingers covered in thick mud like icing, and he’s wiping it all over himself and Dean when he struggles to get out of his grip.
Ok it’s up!! Took a little longer than expected but what can ya do! Hope everyone enjoys it!!!! Much love pals <3
Word count: 1082
Warnings: a couple swear words but mostly fluff!!
Request: “Okay so this goes back to the game five between toronto and washington. I honestly thought it would be a really cute imagine. It’s about the hit that Nazem Kadri lays on Ovi. So can it be where the reader is dating Kadri and she is a huge Caps fan so she "scolds” Naz. If you can, try and make it really cute and fluffy!“ - @hockeyfanatic910
It was game five between the Toronto Maple Leafs and the Washington Capitals and everyone in the arena was on the edge of their seats. You were pretty sure you were going to burst a blood vessel because of how tense this particular match up made you. Being from Washington, you had grown up a fan of the Capitals but your boyfriend, Nazem Kadri, played for the Leafs, so you were kind of, sort of cheering for both teams.
Part way through the first period you saw Nazem hop the boards and head onto the ice for his shift but there was something about the way he was skating, almost extra aggressively, that made you think something was up. That’s when it happened, you could practically see Nazem’s eyes lock onto his target as he went in to check none other than Alex Ovechkin.
Okay one more request! Same one who wants angst because omg I love your writing! This one can totally be fluffy or NSFW or however you want it! How would RFA and Unknown and V react in a Royalty AU where they're in an arranged marriage with MC but they didn't want to marry her at first but end up totally falling for them somehow in the end?
HI THERE NONNY!!
I know it’s been FOREVER but I’m finally starting this!!! I’m sorry it took so long, those other requests took a lot longer that I thought but I hope to find my rhythm back with these and will try to post one RFA member per day.
PLEASE NOTE: I will not be writing for Jaehee- as you requested for a “female” MC there would be no point in making an arranged marriage with a female royal to another female royal. The whole heir thing would be a mess and adopting would only cause issues with who is the true next in line for succession… so for this one, she will be left out- Sorry!