okay now i'm just gonna cry

  • Livvy: and now for a gay update with Kit Herondale
  • Kit: getting gayer
  • Livvy: thank you Kit
3

Camila’s Ustream 07.05.14

stopping for gas (1306 words)

based on the snippets of footage from 13x03 we’ve already seen, here come the angsty scenes between dean and jody you never wanted (but they were in my head nevertheless so now you can suffer, too!!)


having jody sit next to him in the impala has to be one of the strangest experience dean has ever had to live through. she doesn’t fit naturally like sam who spent most of his life in this car; she doesn’t have the same terrifying yet calming presence that cas has.

used to have. he chokes back tears. no use thinking about that now.

they’ve been silent almost the whole drive – what started as a forced conversation about the case soon became an uncomfortable silence. thankfully jody doesn’t ask, doesn’t press, just accepts dean’s unwillingness to talk and scribbles down some notes for the case.

still, it’s different. her presence reminds him of everything that went wrong in the last few weeks: sam taking off with jack, jack being there, having no leads on his mom, and cas –

well, cas.

at this point, he’s too tired to even think about it. it’s like running the same laps for years before finally collapsing and giving up; he won’t reach the finish line anyway. not that there ever was a finish line, because a happy end has never been an option for them.

he taps on the steering wheel and sighs. jody looks up and frowns at the fuel gauge. “we should probably stop soon,” she says. “we’re almost out of gas. i thought you’d take better care of your lady.”

it’s a joke, it’s a joke, it’s a joke, he knows this when he grips the wheel tighter. “i know,” he answers curtly. i haven’t taken care of anything the last few weeks would be the better answer; i couldn’t.

the truth is, as pathetic as it is, stopping for gas used to be easier when not everything reminded you of your dead – whatever. he knows it’s bullshit, he knows that all these gas’n’sips aren’t out there to hunt him down, to mock him, to remind him of one of the worst mistakes he’s ever made, but somehow his brain and his heart don’t connect all that well these days.

sam has taken care of filling up baby the last few weeks and every single time dean had sat in the front seat, hands curled so tight around the wheel that they started to hurt by the time sam went to pay.

thinking about the time he let cas go when he was his most vulnerable, without – almost – without a second thought, he wonders how different it would have been if cas had just been able to stay. how different they would have been.

maybe cas would still be human. hunting with them. being with dean (in every sense of the word). at the very least, he probably wouldn’t be dead, stabbed in the back because he thought that he isn’t worth anything to anyone.

because dean never told him. anything.

he almost misses the next gas station because he’s too lost in thought – if not for jody’s disapproved humming, he probably would have.

then, he just sits there, frozen in place.

asking sam – or rather, commanding him – to fill up the tank had been easy. sam knows that asking questions is futile. jody? not so much. the most terrifying thing is, he probably would answer if jody asked the right questions.

when he feels jody’s gaze on him he knows he’s been silent too long for it to not be weird. he’s pathetic.

“you okay, friend?”

and there it is, the million dollar question.

no would be the easiest and the hardest answer.

“could you, um,” he says instead. “would you mind filling up the tank?” please don’t ask, please don’t ask, please don’t ask. “i got cash,” he continues and pulls out his wallet. jody puts a hand on his arm.

“i got this,” she says. “but would you mind telling me why you want me to do this?” of course she would ask.

dean takes a deep breath. “never mind,” he panics and is out of the car in one swift motion. jody sighs and gets out of the car, too.

“dean,” she says forcefully when he fumbles with the gas pump. she sounds so scarily like a mom – not his mom per se, which makes it even worse – that he can’t help but stop and listen to her. he’s terrified.

“i don’t… want to say that i know what you’re going through. because i don’t. but i want to say that i’m there for you. for whatever you want to tell me. trust me, i’ve got two teenage girls at home, whatever it is that’s eating you up it can’t be worse than this.”

i bet it could, he thinks and for a moment he contemplates just breaking down and emptying his heart out right here, right then, in this dingy gas’n’sip, but he can’t. if he breaks down, he’s done for good and that’s not an option.

he tries the next best thing. “cas used to work here,” he says. “i mean, not here specifically, but – you know.”

jody’s face softens and he wants to cry. “oh, dean,” she says, slowly approaching him and taking the fuel hose out of his hands. when she pats him on the back, his entire body tenses and relaxes at the same time. “i’m sorry.”

they fill up the tank, dean just standing next to her, helplessly – he doesn’t know what to say and he isn’t entirely sure what she may already know.

“i wish i could have met him,” she says after a few moments, cautiously. “you should have brought him over to dinner sometime.”

it’s not an accusation, far from it; it’s more an acknowledgment of everything dean can’t say. he swallows. the thing is, he would have loved to bring him over to dinner. his mom is gone right now and the truth is that she was gone long before that – jody is the closest thing he ever had to a mother.

although it wouldn’t have meant anything, he would have loved to bring him over. fake it for one night. just one. “yeah,” he agrees hoarsely. it’s getting harder and harder to choke back his tears.

“well, maybe you can make good for that when he comes back.” she smiles. he wants to object, wants to say he won’t come back, but she doesn’t let him, already knowing what he’s about to say. “aww, come on, don’t be like that. you know i saw my own son come back from the dead. and you two brother have died more times than i can count. nothing’s final. you just have to have confidence.”

she doesn’t say hope nor faith, and he’s eternally grateful for that. she also doesn’t expect an answer which makes his heart swell up even more.

“alright, i’m gonna go pay,” she says. “you want any snacks?”

he shakes his head and watches her shrug and make her way to the building before surprising himself and saying: “wait!”

she stops in her tracks and turns around. “you’re worse than alex,” she says. “what do you want?”

he can’t say anything; if he says something, he’ll cry, and that’s not an option. instead, he takes the few steps and pulls her into a hug. she needs a moment before leaning into the hug, putting his arms around him and embracing him firmly.

“it’s going to be okay,” she says softly. “you can tell me anything when we get out of here, okay?”

he nods. his face is probably a grimace by now, strained from the efforts not to cry, but the prospect of maybe – just maybe – telling jody everything is making it harder to bear all the shit that’s currently going on in his life.

after a few seconds, she pulls out of the hug and nods towards him. “i’m gonna bring some ice cream,” she says. “the monsters can wait.”

anonymous asked:

Hi! How about  "I'm sorry I called you at 3 AM. I needed you" or "Stay the night. Please" with Saeyoung? I really need to read something romantic and cute...? You choose if it is MC who says it or Saeyoung ^-^ Sorry if I'm not clear enough, my English is really bad xD Thank you so much!

this turned angsty. i’m mildly apologetic.

“Don’t go.”

He’s there with his laptop in his hand and his jacket in the other, fiery hair ruffled and shirt disheveled as he kicks on his boots in a vain attempt to run away—as far as possible—from his feelings, from this, from her. He doesn’t think she understands, but she does and achingly so to where she calls him every night. His heart breaks when he hears her voice but it isn’t enough, it’s never enough to stop him from leaving her. He’d rather hurt her now than hurt her later.

This was not a new practice for Saeyoung.

Saeyoung Choi was always fleeting, hidden in the peripherals of her vision and disappearing once she had truly looked. Her memories of him always seemed smudged like decayed film, keeping her from being able to truly examine him for what he was. It had always been like this, always the same game and the same chase but today is different; now she tires of chasing and she wants to bet that he was tired of running.  Fire runs through her veins when she sees how lithe he is in trying to get out of the apartment as soon as possible. She wanted him and he was running from her and she was chasing after him like fools do in love.

He can’t bring himself to stop—really stop, at least—and he’s halfway out the door before he can feel someone or something pressed against the curve of his back, bound to him like a spell. 

Listen, you need to sto—”

She interrupts him. “I’m trying so hard to make you stay, I’m holding on for dear life, why won’t you ever just let me all the way in?”

Her sobs are deafening to his ears. He can’t stand it, and he can’t begin to form a single word knowing that he’s made her cry, yet again. A real cry, akin to a child’s, with desperate heaves and snot filled sniffles paired with wails while she clung to his back. He figures he needs to say something, anything to make this stop. So he begs. 

“Please…”

Saeyoung’s head was reeling, lips still swollen from her kisses and hair still disheveled from her fingers and heart still aching from her cries. Everything was so fast, from the kiss to deciding to leave suddenly and now the words that came dripping out of her lips in a loneliness that hits dead center to home.

“My heart feels like it’s going to break in half. Please love me as much as I love you.”

He turns around and suddenly finds himself holding her to his chest, lips pressed against her skull in such a fragile matter that it almost seems like he’s trying to keep her from breaking apart. Anxiety rushes in his bloodstream and it makes his hands shake from all the thoughts that threaten to rob him of his self control to keep himself away. Loving her was a luxury he couldn’t afford to own—nothing could ever be his and he’s been told that more times than he has fingers on his hands.

He mumbles the next words into her hair, almost as if he wants to bury himself into her to hide himself. “Okay, okay. I’m sorry for making you cry. I’ll take care of you… I’ll stay the night. Just please stop crying.”

And such simple words can work for now, they both decide. 

Fish part 1
  • Steve: Did you have pets back where you came from?
  • Dianna: No.
  • Steve: Would you like a pet?
  • Dianna: That would be fun!
  • Steve: okay there are dogs and cats, and-
  • Dianna: a baby!
  • Steve: You can’t have that as a pet
  • Dianna: fish
  • Steve: a fish?
  • Dianna: yes!
  • Dianna: They're so pretty!
  • Steve: You don't want like a dog or a kitten or anything?
  • Dianna: No I'd like a fish.
  • Dianna: A little fish
  • Steve: Alrighty then a fish how hard can that be?
  • *they go get Dianna a fish and Steve gets her a really pretty tank*
  • Steve: Okay so they say feed them twice a day-
  • Dianna, sitting and staring at it: they said once.
  • Steve: but he looks hungry
  • Dianna: No he isn't I just fed him.
  • Steve: He's going to be hungry tonight though I-
  • Dianna: No.
  • Steve: Fish don't do much you know, they just swim and swim.
  • Dianna, really focused on the fish: Mhmm.
  • Steve: What's his name
  • Dianna: Steve
  • Steve: Yes?
  • Dianna: No his name is Steve.
  • Steve: That's neat, I'd look pretty nice as a fish.
  • Dianna, smiling: yes you would ;)
  • *that night*
  • Steve, sneaking into living room: you look hungry and I'm gonna give you all the food you want
  • Steve, feeding the fish the whole damn container: You're still eating? Wow.
  • Dianna: Steve, what are you doing
  • Steve: CHECKING ON STEVE!
  • Dianna, smiling: You like him too?
  • Steve: Yes. That is my little buddy now.
  • Dianna: Wait you weren't feeding him were you?
  • Steve: No! NO, just telling him goodnight.
  • Dianna, glaring at him: Okay...
  • *the next morning*
  • Dianna: Steve!
  • Steve: Yes?
  • Dianna: His food is all gone and he's not-
  • Dianna, sadly: oh.
  • Steve: Well uh, I-
  • Dianna, starting to cry: Steve is dead.
  • Steve: WAIT ME OR BOTH OF US wait don't cry! I'm sorry!
  • Dianna: It was only one day!
  • Dianna: Why did you feed him?
  • Steve: Well, I um, he just looked hungry!
  • Dianna: I miss Steve.
  • Steve: You can have me?
  • Dianna: ... I like fish Steve better.
  • Steve: HEY
The photograph is from that rehearsal, taken from a seat just behind Louis. The stage in the background is washed in blues, reds, pinks, yellows, beams of light pouring from all different angles, crossing over each other at random. The spotlight is off, so the bodies on the stage are almost just silhouettes in motion. There’s the whip of a skirt caught in mid-turn, a tall figure with its arms extended, two shapes bent toward each other at stage left. Behind them, the skeleton of the set makes sharp lines and broken shapes against the white backdrop. In the foreground is Louis, just a sliver of his face as seen from behind, the light catching on the top of his cheekbone and the ends of his hair. His hands are in the air in front of him, gesturing as he explains something to one of the actors, and he can see ink stains on his knuckles. He can see for the first time the way he looks when he’s directing, the set of his shoulders, the hint of a smile at the corner of his mouth. It’s his kids, his work, distilled into an image and made beautiful. And Harry did it. He looks down at the table because he really, really needs to look at anything that is not this picture right now, and his eyes fall on a tiny piece of paper. It must have slid out with the print without him noticing it. He can see Harry’s handwriting on it. Lou, So you don’t forget what you look like to the rest of us Happy birthday!!! xxx Haz

MMMM I LOVE AXEL

  • Mom: Why are you always staring off into the distance? Are you okay? What are you thinking?
  • Me: A month without uploading he comes back with a tag (whoo)
  • That no one even tagged him he's not a challenge to drag (ouch)So prepare for an attack and by that I mean cringe (cringe)Cause this motherfucker's 'bout to get dragged by his fringe First things first, you're freakishly tall it's weird you look like a noodle (true)You've got hair that was cool in 2007 and wet you just look like a poodle (hobbit)Throw in a really annoying posh voice and, yup, that's Dan (posh)
  • You're what would happen if Winnie the Pooh fucked Slenderman
  • You procrastinate making videos, cause being judged is scary? (ooh)You're so close to being forgotten, the hate's imaginary (whoa)The only reason you get views is you're another white guyThat people ship with his friend cause they think it's kawaii Oh Reasons why Dan's a fail (Yay!)I'll give you some
  • You never tweet, you overeat, all you do is cry and sleep
  • Your jokes are shitposts and memes with no originality (uh huh)Your family's sad you flopped your law degree at university And anything embarrassing that's from your past you just delete You were vegan for like three weeks, then what, you missed the meat? (milk)Wow, I'm so impressed by your clear moral integrity! You try so hard to be peaceful and diplomatic
  • But can't make toast without tumblr saying you're problematic (boo, oh)I could go on there's more if I check
  • There's more things on this list than chins on your neck
  • On your birthday you joked you were a quarter way to death
  • A 100? Yeah, when getting out of bed makes you out of breath? (real)So your celebrity crush was J-Law but now it's Evan P.? (mhmm)What the fuck even is your sexuality?
  • It's hard to put you in a box when you keep it so blurry (what is it)I think it's just to hide that you're secretly a furry
  • I'm-I'm joking obviously Okay that went deep... Repress it? Yup! Before I start crying let's wrap this shit up
  • I'm gonna go and masturbate, then cry into a slice of pizza (feelings)Shout out to the other youtubers especially Ryan Higa (jerk)A cringe compilation mixed with cultural appropriation Met with no depreciation it's the YouTube nation Click subscribe, if you wanna watch 4 videos a year! (or 3)
  • To see my last one (from 10 years ago), just click over here (fail)So leave a comment with your reaction, you can call me a liar Cause you just witnessed the roast of danisnotonfire
  • [Sobbing]
Dear Evan Hansen
  • Zoe: What?
  • Evan: No, it's just you're breaking up with me, I mean it's why you came over so--
  • Zoe: Breaking up with you?
  • Evan: I know, how presumptuous can I get, I don't even know if we're like, "dating officially," or whatever, which isn't even-- I don't know why I'm talking right now, you can go ahead and tell me, I'm not gonna cry and, like, start breaking things.
  • Zoe: I'm not breaking up with you.
  • Evan: Okay.
  • Evan: Thank you.
  • Zoe: Don't mention it.
  • Oh, Evan. <3

anonymous asked:

I just imagined a scene and now I'm tearing up; okay so: Dean goes round to tell Claire that Cas is dead and she just bursts into tears and runs to her room. Dean follows and finds her crying into the grumpy cat. Minutes later Sam stops himself from walking in after he hears "were you ever gonna tell him?" "Maybe. But i don't want it to be a life or death thing. I don't want one of us to be dying and just... say it" "you really loved him didn't you" "I did" - something like that

How very dare you #cw mcd

Originally posted by jessestar10

*whispers*

…………….I might have just finished the next part of the arrangement. I still need to edit and do final touches and chat with my wonderful twin @deanssweetheart23 to make sure everything’s good and that I didn’t make any dumb mistakes but it might be out in the next couple days. No promises. Okay bye now………………..

Quotes From the Gravity Falls Dub

“I WILL NEVER TELL YOU NO MATTER HOW MUCH YOU KINKSHAME ME!”
“I’m so hip I’m Hilary Clinton, Right?”
“CAN AN ANT DO THIS FORD?”
“MY NAME IS GENENE!”
“Ahh incest.”
“We’re going to kill him. We’re going to kill him.”
“UHH SOOS, DIE.”
“One of us! One of us!”
“Moshi Moshi Old man Desu!”
“WHAT IS A HOMESTUCK?”
“HOMESTUCK IS GARBAAAAAGE!”
“Boat? Boat!”
“HA! LEAF DANCE!”
“Okay enough breaking the 4th wall!”
“*Gasp* I peed a little!”
“We’re cannonally gay!”
“AGH I HATE DISNEY! I HATE FEELINGS!”
“It’s my hat now Bitch!”
“You can go eat a dick Grunkle Stan like I really mean it die in a fire- wait you already did.”
“You’ll probably notice Oregon is pretty fucked up.”
“Weakness ungnome.”
“[Insert the whole speech about the ants]”
“*AGRESSIVE KAZOO PLAYING*”
“I’m just gonna drink from a Rick and Morty bottle.”

Gravity Falls: Go there.

@cooldude618
@chongoblog
@knittinggiantbeanies
@awkwardgravityfallsphotos
@ghostanjo
@weirdmageddon
@dirtygfconfessions
@popelickva

3

Help! I’ve fallen down the rabbit hole of TJ feels and can’t find my way back out.

@steverogersnotebook @onceuponardj@writersblockstanfever @marvel-at-stucky @lbarrsxs @sebastianstanchrisevansuniverses @f0r-the-l0ve-0f-marvel-men @marvelmistress2015 @stucky-romanova-stark @just-call-me-mrs-captain @captaincorruptor @love-buckybarnes @sosebastian @imsebastianstanobsessed @twhstuckylover @ilovewintersoldiersandsebastians @dwindlingdichotomy @theconstant1944 @stevetopsbuckysbottom @steeb-and-buckbuck @valerietodad @buckymychild @poebucky @lokilover14 @phdna @xdarkestdreamingx @misha-collins-angel-of-thursday @lovesmoakingarrow @bucky-buchananbarnes @dangerouslywingedphilosopher @prettylittlerose21 @buckys-not-a-villian @mandazord @always-a-marvel-addict @the221buckyfangirl @sebbys-girl @unabashedlyfoggybanana

DW evolution with Eddie Redmayne
  • 9th Doctor: I'M NOT YOUR MOMMY! GO TO YOUR ROOM!
  • 10th Doctor: Why are you following me? I'M NOT YOUR MOMMY!
  • 11th Doctor: Where are your parents? Omg please don't cry
  • Next Doctor (Eddie): Shh... Come here your little hurt soul everything is gonna be alright It's okay you're safe here in the T.A.R.D.I.S no one can hurt you now just focus on my hearts beating okay Mommy's here.

If my drawing skills were good enough I would totally redraw scenes from The Little Mermaid with Jimin as the mermaid prince who falls in love with a human who would be me asdfgh ignore this weak af comment

Can you imagine our little Jimin with pretty deep green scales and fins, swimming around in his underwater castle? He’s one of many siblings but his beautiful voice make him stand out; as well as his curiosity and fun-loving personality that got him into some troubles before. 

He’s so curious about the human world and every new object coming from the land is an inestimable treasure to him…and his best friend Tae the fish is always there by his side in his adventures. 

asdfghjkl can you imagine?? Jimin looking lovingly at this human dancing on the boat, thinking this is the most beautiful human he ever saw… he has this sweet smile on his face and he giggles when the human does. AND JIMIN SAVING HIS HUMAN FROM DROWNING AND THEN SINGING HIS LOVE AHHHH 

Psst can you see Jimin playing with corals and shells as he’s all lovestruck? Picking up seaweed to do the “they love me-they don’t” thing?? Just- picture this: lovestruck Jimin singing to himself!! 

His love makes him go to the Sea Witch where he exchanges his voice for human legs; and here he is, standing with his shaking new legs, mute but he’s all smile and Jin the crab can’t scold him because he can’t resist Jimin’s eye smile. 

And he finally gets to meet his human and ahhh he’s so happy…so shy yet so happy… of course there’s the problem of his lack of voice but who cares. Love blossoms and grows. 

Let’s just pass the whole “the sea witch betrayed the deal and now i have to save my human” situation and skip to the part where he’s a mermaid again and looks at his human longingly from the ocean. His smile is relieved yet sad, so sad… His human is safe but now they are separated I JUST LOVE THE IMAGE OF MERMAID!JIMIN ON HIS ROCK LOOKING LONGINGLY AT HIS HUMAN

But! Jimin’s father, the king of the sea, cannot bear to see his child so unhappy. So he grants him his deepest wish: becoming human so he can join the love of his life. And here is Jimin, stepping out of the water with a dazzling smile on his face and he runs toward his human, who could cry from happiness. But he wipes his human’s tears away because, from now on, they’ll always be together. 

Book of Mormon (Act 1) Starter Pack
  • "Hello!"
  • "Have fun in Hell."
  • "This book will change your life!"
  • "France! Land of pastries and turtlenecks!"
  • "Where is that?"
  • "Oh boy! Like Lion King!"
  • "Oh, He answered YOUR prayer?"
  • "Tomorrow is a latter day."
  • "Alright, just remember to do whatever ____ tells you to do."
  • "Don't worry, my little problem is in check."
  • "I lie a lot!"
  • "We got Mrs Brown to sing like an African for you."
  • "All of my friends always end up leaving me but... You can't!"
  • "Are you a Star Wars guy or a Star Trek guy?"
  • "I've always had the hope that on the day I go to Heaven, Heavenly Father will shake my hand and say 'You've done an awesome job, _____.'"
  • "I'll do something incredible that blows God's freaking mind!"
  • "Hasa diga Eebowai!"
  • "But having a saying makes it all seem better."
  • "Raise your middle finger to the sky and curse His rotten name!"
  • "Fuck you God!"
  • "'F you' to Heavenly Father?! Holy moly, I said it like thirteen times!"
  • "If you don't like what we say, try living here a couple days."
  • "Fuck you in the eye."
  • "There are certainly a lot of things here in ____ that can be... disturbing."
  • "Don't feel those feelings. Hold them IN instead."
  • "Now don't you dare start crying."
  • "I thought about us on a deserted island. We'd swim naked and in the sea, and then he'd/she'd/they'd try and...."
  • "My hetero side just won."
  • "I think it's okay that you're having gay thoughts, just so long as you never act upon them."
  • "Imagine that your brain is made of tiny boxes. Then find the box that's gay and CRUSH IT! Okay?"
  • "Oh no no nonono, I'm not having gay thoughts."
  • "I can see how this is gonna be a lot like Lord of the Rings."
  • "I would do anything for you. I'm your best friend."
  • "Don't forget what you told me. You are awesome!"
  • "When you go to bed at night, do you sometimes feel a power stirring inside you?"
  • "Wow, so the Bible's actually a trilogy? And the Book of Mormon is Return of the Jedi?"
  • "What the fuck is a steak knife?"
  • "I do not want to spend another night hiding under my bed!"
  • "Sal Tlay Ka Siti.."
  • "O-M-Gosh."
  • "I once told a lie when I was twelve and I had a dream I went to Hell."
  • "Africa is nothing like The Lion King!"
  • "To heck with rules."
  • "I'm not your best friend!"
  • "Jesus knew that He had to man up."
  • "So He crawled up on that cross and He stuck it out."
  • "Just like Jesus, I'm growing a pair."
  • "I'm gonna man up all over myself."
  • "And if we want to go there, we just have to follow that white boy!"
  • "Heavenly Father, why do you let bad things happen?"
  • "More to the point, why do you let bad things happen to me?"