okay my edits are getting a little better

“Change is necessary – necessary for you to grow and to learn and to better yourself. Because everything in your life comes to an end. And, as this chapter in my life comes to an end, I look back at it with a grateful heart, and I smile. I didn’t know then but I know now, a little bit of advice is to let everyday go day by day and learn and be OK with the fact that it’s not always going to be okay but it’s going to get better.”

3

But if there was a scale that could measure a heart, I want my scale to say that I’m a little bit more happy. Therefore I can move on, therefore I can tie my shoelace, therefore I can smile. I also want the people who love me to do that too when they get pulled down.

To, Kim Namjoon, who inspired me to become a better leader, who taught me that you have to hold on even when the whole world goes against you and the one who gave me assurance that it’s okay to feel lonely.

Here’s something funny I noticed at MinnCon.

This is how far apart their chairs are at the beginning of the panel:

Aww. They look so lonely. But don’t worry. Jared immediately starts moving his:

That’s a little better. But when they go to sit down, they both just automatically move closer:

Whew. Okay. That’s probably close enough, right?:

WRONG. Because if they aren’t sitting close enough to get their knees all tangled, what is even the point?

PAX with Mark (Story)

With Mark back on YouTube, which warms my heart greatly to know that he is doing okay and is progressively getting better, I’ve decided to release a bit of that story I’ve mentioned a few times. This is a little story, fanfiction, imagine (call it what you may) I’ve rewritten, edited, revised and changed around since about March of this year. It is nowhere near complete, but I wanted to share the first part with you all to get some feedback.

If it gets relatively good reviews, I’ll post the second part! 

I do take criticism lightly, though, so feel free to ridicule my grammar, phrasing, description or whatever you want to pick at. 

Please note: there are references to Cyndago. They are brief. I had written this part long before the current tragic events took place and have no intention of mentioning them in later parts, out of respect for the Kyre family and friends.

———–

Without further ado, I present to you the story of a PAX South crew member (you) who happens to be moderating for Markiplier’s booth/panel/activities!

Warning: this story gets pretty cheesy. Just wait for it.

____________________________________________________

Your POV

Today is the day- the day you’ve been anticipating since last year. You’ve been working for PAX for about two years now as both an online moderator and a crew member at PAX East and Prime, but you’ve never been to PAX South. However, this year is your time to shine.

Keep reading

Beautiful To Me. -Joe Sugg Imagine.

https://youtu.be/GuKL8JZMrVY

Please listen to the song above before reading this imagine or if you’d prefer you can read it during the imagine :) xxx

_______________________

I leaned my weight against the frame of my bedroom door. My arms were folded across my chest as I watched her. She was so fascinating to me. She sat on my bed, make up brushes and eye shadow palettes spread across the sheets.

I kept silent.

I watched her as she grabbed a hair tie, gathering her luscious locks of hair up into a messy bun. Strands of it fell just before her face, small baby hairs poking out here and there.

She looked gorgeous just sat there in her tracksuit.

I watched her rub a moisturizer onto her face before she started to pump out a liquid onto the back of her hand then applying it to her face.

“What are you looking at?”  She murmured, a laugh passing through her lips as she glanced to my hovering figure.

“You.” I smiled.

I chuckled seeing her tilt her head up to face me, her eyes giving me a pointed look.

“Can’t a guy watch his best friend get ready on his bed? You know you’ve got a very comfortable bed right across the hallway where you could do all of this..” I explained, allowing my tongue to sweep across my lips as I looked at all of the products sprawled across my bed.

“Your room is just so much more fun to do all of this in..” She giggled, using a brush to blend in the make up she had just applied to her skin.

The make up was like her armor for the night ahead. Although, she always used make up. It was a constant protection for her from the outside world. There was never a day when she would not wear make up. It was very rare that I got to see her without it. It would usually be just before she got in the shower that I’d get a glance at her without make up. It would also be just before she’d fall asleep that I would peak my head in through her bedroom door to bid her goodnight, and under the light of moon I was able to see her true beauty.

“I’ll let you get away with it just the once, L/N.” I smirked, gazing into her eye/colour eyes. Her guard was up. It was always up but she would never tell anyone. She would never tell anyone about her problems. She would never tell anyone about her worries. She would never even allow a hint of what she was feeling glow in her eyes.

I could see it though. I could see that she was dealing with worrying problems. I could see through her eyes that she wasn’t feeling herself. I could see in those orbs of her she held many insecurities but she would never let me know.

“Another date?” I question, crossing my leg over the other. I watched as she hummed to my question, dabbing a brush into an eye shadow palette.

I frowned ever so slightly at her response, holding back a deep sigh that I badly wanted to release. I could already picture the night ahead. I felt like I was suddenly zapped into a video game, someone instantly hitting the restart button and bringing me right back to the starting point of the game.

I’m always picking up the pieces once they fall to her feet. I’m like a shadow hovering behind her. She doesn’t know it but I’m always right behind her, picking up the pieces of her that she fall to her feet. I know everyday is a battle for her and it tears her apart, but she’ll never let anyone know. She’ll never let anyone know about the demons that she’s fighting with.  She keeps her guard up constantly, never allowing anyone to see her for what she holds.

Like a shadow, she hides in the background. Whenever she’s brought up in conversation, she’ll switch the subject as quick as she can. She thinks I don’t know, but I do. It’s hard to believe that she’d rather live in the shadows when she’s got such a shining personality and a sweet nature.

“His name is Dylan. We met last week at the local coffee shop.” Y/N smiled, brushing a rosy shade across her cheeks with a fluffy brush.

I nodded my head to her words, keeping my lips sealed like an envelope. I wanted nothing more than to take her by the shoulders and tell her to stay at home with me. I couldn’t do that.  I’m meant to support her. I’m meant to encourage her to get out there and find a sweet guy that will love her unconditionally.  

“Okay out, out, out! I’m getting changed now!” She grinned, shooing me out of the room as I gasped.

“Yes, get ready in Joe’s room! It’s not like you’ve got your own room right across the hall!” I exasperated, rolling my eyes in a playful manor before I exited my bedroom, leaving her to get changed.

I walked upstairs, sitting myself down on the white plush sofa in anticipation. I grinned immediately seeing a picture of Y/N and I on the coffee table.

I couldn’t be any more lucky than to live with her. I couldn’t wait to wake up every morning just to see her and all her beauty. She was my best friend and much more to me. She could brighten New York City with that radiant smile of hers. Her laugh could cure any type of illness it was that contagious.

My ears tuned in to the clicking of heels. I turned my head only to feel my jaw fall open and instantly shut close. I watched her as she shyly twirled a strand of her hair around her finger. Her hair was now falling around her shoulders in neat waves. Her body was decorated with a simple flowing white dress, wedged sandals protecting her feet while a matching clutch rested in her hand.

“How do I look? Do I look like I’ve overdone it? Do I look too eager?” Y/N asked, a timid smile resting on her lips as she looked at herself in the living room mirror, giving herself a look over.

I couldn’t help but allow my eyes to scan her from head to toe, my breath catching in my throat at the sight of her.

She was so beautiful. So incredibly beautiful and she didn’t know it.  I always loved the moment when we would walk into a restaurant or even a shop because everyone would just immediately stop what they were doing and stare at her. A stare of fascination. A stare that would make her look away shyly while she’d hide behind me like a timid shadow. Everyone would still continue to stare while we walked further into the building, completely taken a back by her breath taking beauty.

“You look beautiful. Absolutely beautiful, Y/N.” I smiled brightly, watching a rosy blush cover her cheeks while a small smile took over her nude lips.

“You’re always the charmer, aren’t you Joseph?” She giggled, bending down to my sitting figure before she pressed a kiss to my cheek.

“Well I better get going..” Y/N trailed off, an excited tone in her voice.

“Wait! Let me get a picture of you.” I grinned, standing to my feet while sliding my phone out of my pocket and positioned her back against the wall hearing her protests.

“Just one photo!” I chuckled, crossing my eyes to create a funny face causing her to laugh. I grinned hearing that contagious laugh break through her lips while her Oscar Award winning smile over took her lips, my phone snapping the picture instantly creating a beautiful memory already.

“Okay, okay, you’ve had your photo! I better get going now! I’ll see you later!” Y/N laughed, kissing my cheek before she waved me off.

I watched her leave, an empty feeling now settling in my stomach as I sighed sitting down on the sofa, waiting for the time that she would return.

____________________________________

I murmured while clicking around my computer, editing my new Sugg Sunday video. I was quite happy with how this week’s video turned out. I did the room mate tag with Y/N but of course, I added a little twist to it. I asked Y/N some room mate questions that I would only know the answer to but if she failed to answer the question correctly, she would get a shock from my electric shock pads.

I chuckled as I watched Y/N squeal from getting a shock, making sure to leave that clip in the video. My eyes suddenly widened while my body jumped from shock at the sound of the front door slamming shut. Following the rough slam of the door, I could hear the sound of rapid heels clicking against the wood before the slam of the door facing mine echoed around the flat.

I shifted in my seat, saving the work I’ve edited. I shuffled out of my room, stepping across the hallway and pressing my ear against the door. I could feel my heart breaking hearing quiet sobs and sniffles on the other side.

I pushed down on the handle, opening the door and entering into her room. I turned to see Y/N laying down on her bed, her face pressed into her white pillow.

“Joe, get out!” She cried, her voice straining slightly. I frowned, listening to the sound of rain pelt lightly against the window. I watched as tears dripped down her tender cheeks like the rain drops that were now falling from the sky.

I approached her bed side, sitting my figure down on the edge while I laid on my side to face her.

“Joe, I told you to get out! Please just leave me alone!” Y/N sobbed, her hand reaching out to hit my chest.

I let her though. I let her punch me relentlessly. I was always her hand to hold, even if she didn’t know it. It was often that she would push me hard. She never wanted me to see behind the walls she built so high and around herself. She kept everything to herself, always pushing me away when she was upset. I never let go though. I would never let go. I held her hand through everything even when she didn’t want me to.

“What happened Y/N?” I ask softly, keeping my voice low while I gently grasped onto her hand.

I watched as she sniffled, lifting her head to reveal herself to me. I noted the black mascara that was staining her cheeks while her tear eyes stained with a red colour. I frowned deeper at the sight of her, gently rubbing soothing circles onto the back of her hand with the pad of my thumb.

“M-my date never showed up..” Y/N sniffled, her voice wavering as tears slipped down her cheeks. I frowned deeply at her words, anger pulsing through my veins at her words while my jaw clenched ever so slightly.

He never showed up? What an absolute d*ck.

“What is it about me and guys Joe?” She sniffled, hiccuping through tears.

“I’m never good enough! I thought I had a shot with this guy! I bet if I was a tall and skinny blonde girl it would have all worked out! What is it about me Joe? You’re a guy tell me!” She cried, standing to her feet while stopping as she looked in the mirror.

“It’s everything about me that’s just wrong, isn’t it? Are my thighs too big? Are my teeth not straight enough? Look at my stomach, it’s this stupid little tummy of mine!” Y/N cried loudly, tears falling rapidly down her cheeks while she tugged at her hair in frustration.

It had happened. In one fleeting moment it had suddenly happened. She had let her guard down and now I could see what’s been hiding behind those walls she built so high. All of her insecurities she had were now being revealed to me.

“What type of guy would want to date me anyways!? I’ve got the worst eye colour, my hair is boring and bland! Look at my thighs! They’re huge! Gosh, I’m nothing but a slob! I need to join a gym and just lose this stomach of mine!”  She cried, loud and heavy sobs leaving her lips while her chest heaved.

“Y/N!” I yelled loudly, jumping to my feet while I frowned in frustration, running my hands through my hair as I caught her attention.

“Stop! Stop! Stop! You’re absolutely insane! You’re crazy!  You don’t need to change! You don’t need to change your beautiful body! You’re perfect! You’re so beautiful that you can’t even see it! How can you not see it Y/N!?” I yelled, watching her jaw drop ever so slightly at my words.

“You don’t need a guys approval to tell you that your beautiful!” I yelled, tugging at my own hair feeling my heart pound heavily against my chest.

“I’m absolutely crazy about you! I’m so infatuated with you! I’d travel to another world just for you! I’d do anything for you, I’d go anywhere for you! Do you know how much it kills me to see you going out with the wrong guys!? When you come home from dates with the wrong guy, I’m always the one that’s picking up the pieces and you don’t even know it!” I yelled, brushing away the tears that were threatening to spill from my eyes before I slowly approach Y/N, taking her hands into mine and pulling her body closer to mine as I gazed into her eyes.

“Oh sweet, sweet, sweet Y/N. I wish you could see what I could see. When I look at you, I see a beautiful girl with shining eyes. I see a girl with a breath taking smile and a cute button nose. Your hair is gorgeous, just the way it is. I guarantee you that there are millions of girls in this world that would kill to have hair like yours. Your body is perfect. Your simply crazy if you can’t see it. You’ve got a beautiful shining soul and a heart made of pure gold.” I whisper, softly brushing away the tears that trickle down her cheeks. I noticed the way her eyes focused on me, a dazed look in her eyes as she listened.

“When we go out, people stop and stare just to gaze at your beauty. They stop and stare because they’ve never seen someone as beautiful as you. Y/N you’re like a star. A beautiful, shimmering bright star that could light up the sky. You’re so beautiful. So incredibly beautiful and I never want you to change who you are or your appearance. You’re so, so beautiful..You’re beautiful to me..I wish you could see that..” I whisper quietly as I gently cupped her cheek in my hand, pressing my forehead against hers feeling her arms wrap around my neck.

“I’m crazy about you Y/N and I don’t think I could live without you..I don’t know what this world would be like without you but I know it is a world I wouldn’t like to be in..” I say softly, gazing into her eyes that were definitely my favorite feature about her.

I watched as a smile broke onto her lips, her teary eyes now gleaming with colour.

“Joe Sugg..You’ve completely left me speechless..” She spoke quietly, her eyes beaming up at me while a small smile made its way onto my lips.

“Thank you..” She mumbled, her fingers now playing with my hair.

“You can’t thank me for stating the truth Y/N.” I explained, a playful smile now forming on her lips while the sound of our breathing filled the quiet room.

It was almost like time had slowed down. My eyes were completely hypnotized by her beauty.  I couldn’t hold myself back. I had to do it. She looked like a glorious angel and it was almost like someone had pushed me.

Our lips suddenly connected, my hands now sliding to her waist and moving to the small of her back, pulling her closely against my chest as our lips moved in a deep and passionate sync. Colours erupted through my closed eyes while the sound of fireworks rang in my ears loudly. I could feel her heart beat move in rhythm with mine as our lips moved together like they were made for one another.

Slowly I pulled back, only to mumble the words that I’ve held back for so many years.

I could feel myself smile against her lips as I whispered softly.

“My beautiful Y/N, I have loved you for so many years and I will gladly love you for many more. It would be a pleasure to spend the rest of my life telling you how much I love you..”

Please listen to the song above before reading this imagine or if you’d prefer you can read it during the imagine :) xxx

_______________________

I leaned my weight against the frame of my bedroom door. My arms were folded across my chest as I watched her. She was so fascinating to me. She sat on my bed, make up brushes and eye shadow palettes spread across the sheets.

I kept silent.

I watched her as she grabbed a hair tie, gathering her luscious locks of hair up into a messy bun. Strands of it fell just before her face, small baby hairs poking out here and there.

She looked gorgeous just sat there in her tracksuit.

I watched her rub a moisturizer onto her face before she started to pump out a liquid onto the back of her hand then applying it to her face.

“What are you looking at?”  She murmured, a laugh passing through her lips as she glanced to my hovering figure.

“You.” I smiled.

I chuckled seeing her tilt her head up to face me, her eyes giving me a pointed look.

“Can’t a guy watch his best friend get ready on his bed? You know you’ve got a very comfortable bed right across the hallway where you could do all of this..” I explained, allowing my tongue to sweep across my lips as I looked at all of the products sprawled across my bed.

“Your room is just so much more fun to do all of this in..” She giggled, using a brush to blend in the make up she had just applied to her skin.

The make up was like her armor for the night ahead. Although, she always used make up. It was a constant protection for her from the outside world. There was never a day when she would not wear make up. It was very rare that I got to see her without it. It would usually be just before she got in the shower that I’d get a glance at her without make up. It would also be just before she’d fall asleep that I would peak my head in through her bedroom door to bid her goodnight, and under the light of moon I was able to see her true beauty.

“I’ll let you get away with it just the once, L/N.” I smirked, gazing into her eye/colour eyes. Her guard was up. It was always up but she would never tell anyone. She would never tell anyone about her problems. She would never tell anyone about her worries. She would never even allow a hint of what she was feeling glow in her eyes.

I could see it though. I could see that she was dealing with worrying problems. I could see through her eyes that she wasn’t feeling herself. I could see in those orbs of her she held many insecurities but she would never let me know.

“Another date?” I question, crossing my leg over the other. I watched as she hummed to my question, dabbing a brush into an eye shadow palette.

I frowned ever so slightly at her response, holding back a deep sigh that I badly wanted to release. I could already picture the night ahead. I felt like I was suddenly zapped into a video game, someone instantly hitting the restart button and bringing me right back to the starting point of the game.

I’m always picking up the pieces once they fall to her feet. I’m like a shadow hovering behind her. She doesn’t know it but I’m always right behind her, picking up the pieces of her that she fall to her feet. I know everyday is a battle for her and it tears her apart, but she’ll never let anyone know. She’ll never let anyone know about the demons that she’s fighting with.  She keeps her guard up constantly, never allowing anyone to see her for what she holds.

Like a shadow, she hides in the background. Whenever she’s brought up in conversation, she’ll switch the subject as quick as she can. She thinks I don’t know, but I do. It’s hard to believe that she’d rather live in the shadows when she’s got such a shining personality and a sweet nature.

“His name is Dylan. We met last week at the local coffee shop.” Y/N smiled, brushing a rosy shade across her cheeks with a fluffy brush.

I nodded my head to her words, keeping my lips sealed like an envelope. I wanted nothing more than to take her by the shoulders and tell her to stay at home with me. I couldn’t do that.  I’m meant to support her. I’m meant to encourage her to get out there and find a sweet guy that will love her unconditionally.  

“Okay out, out, out! I’m getting changed now!” She grinned, shooing me out of the room as I gasped.

“Yes, get ready in Joe’s room! It’s not like you’ve got your own room right across the hall!” I exasperated, rolling my eyes in a playful manor before I exited my bedroom, leaving her to get changed.

I walked upstairs, sitting myself down on the white plush sofa in anticipation. I grinned immediately seeing a picture of Y/N and I on the coffee table.

I couldn’t be any more lucky than to live with her. I couldn’t wait to wake up every morning just to see her and all her beauty. She was my best friend and much more to me. She could brighten New York City with that radiant smile of hers. Her laugh could cure any type of illness it was that contagious.

My ears tuned in to the clicking of heels. I turned my head only to feel my jaw fall open and instantly shut close. I watched her as she shyly twirled a strand of her hair around her finger. Her hair was now falling around her shoulders in neat waves. Her body was decorated with a simple flowing white dress, wedged sandals protecting her feet while a matching clutch rested in her hand.

“How do I look? Do I look like I’ve overdone it? Do I look too eager?” Y/N asked, a timid smile resting on her lips as she looked at herself in the living room mirror, giving herself a look over.

I couldn’t help but allow my eyes to scan her from head to toe, my breath catching in my throat at the sight of her.

She was so beautiful. So incredibly beautiful and she didn’t know it.  I always loved the moment when we would walk into a restaurant or even a shop because everyone would just immediately stop what they were doing and stare at her. A stare of fascination. A stare that would make her look away shyly while she’d hide behind me like a timid shadow. Everyone would still continue to stare while we walked further into the building, completely taken a back by her breath taking beauty.

“You look beautiful. Absolutely beautiful, Y/N.” I smiled brightly, watching a rosy blush cover her cheeks while a small smile took over her nude lips.

“You’re always the charmer, aren’t you Joseph?” She giggled, bending down to my sitting figure before she pressed a kiss to my cheek.

“Well I better get going..” Y/N trailed off, an excited tone in her voice.

“Wait! Let me get a picture of you.” I grinned, standing to my feet while sliding my phone out of my pocket and positioned her back against the wall hearing her protests.

“Just one photo!” I chuckled, crossing my eyes to create a funny face causing her to laugh. I grinned hearing that contagious laugh break through her lips while her Oscar Award winning smile over took her lips, my phone snapping the picture instantly creating a beautiful memory already.

“Okay, okay, you’ve had your photo! I better get going now! I’ll see you later!” Y/N laughed, kissing my cheek before she waved me off.

I watched her leave, an empty feeling now settling in my stomach as I sighed sitting down on the sofa, waiting for the time that she would return.

____________________________________

I murmured while clicking around my computer, editing my new Sugg Sunday video. I was quite happy with how this week’s video turned out. I did the room mate tag with Y/N but of course, I added a little twist to it. I asked Y/N some room mate questions that I would only know the answer to but if she failed to answer the question correctly, she would get a shock from my electric shock pads.

I chuckled as I watched Y/N squeal from getting a shock, making sure to leave that clip in the video. My eyes suddenly widened while my body jumped from shock at the sound of the front door slamming shut. Following the rough slam of the door, I could hear the sound of rapid heels clicking against the wood before the slam of the door facing mine echoed around the flat.

I shifted in my seat, saving the work I’ve edited. I shuffled out of my room, stepping across the hallway and pressing my ear against the door. I could feel my heart breaking hearing quiet sobs and sniffles on the other side.

I pushed down on the handle, opening the door and entering into her room. I turned to see Y/N laying down on her bed, her face pressed into her white pillow.

“Joe, get out!” She cried, her voice straining slightly. I frowned, listening to the sound of rain pelt lightly against the window. I watched as tears dripped down her tender cheeks like the rain drops that were now falling from the sky.

I approached her bed side, sitting my figure down on the edge while I laid on my side to face her.

“Joe, I told you to get out! Please just leave me alone!” Y/N sobbed, her hand reaching out to hit my chest.

I let her though. I let her punch me relentlessly. I was always her hand to hold, even if she didn’t know it. It was often that she would push me hard. She never wanted me to see behind the walls she built so high and around herself. She kept everything to herself, always pushing me away when she was upset. I never let go though. I would never let go. I held her hand through everything even when she didn’t want me to.

“What happened Y/N?” I ask softly, keeping my voice low while I gently grasped onto her hand.

I watched as she sniffled, lifting her head to reveal herself to me. I noted the black mascara that was staining her cheeks while her tear eyes stained with a red colour. I frowned deeper at the sight of her, gently rubbing soothing circles onto the back of her hand with the pad of my thumb.

“M-my date never showed up..” Y/N sniffled, her voice wavering as tears slipped down her cheeks. I frowned deeply at her words, anger pulsing through my veins at her words while my jaw clenched ever so slightly.

He never showed up? What an absolute d*ck.

“What is it about me and guys Joe?” She sniffled, hiccuping through tears.

“I’m never good enough! I thought I had a shot with this guy! I bet if I was a tall and skinny blonde girl it would have all worked out! What is it about me Joe? You’re a guy tell me!” She cried, standing to her feet while stopping as she looked in the mirror.

“It’s everything about me that’s just wrong, isn’t it? Are my thighs too big? Are my teeth not straight enough? Look at my stomach, it’s this stupid little tummy of mine!” Y/N cried loudly, tears falling rapidly down her cheeks while she tugged at her hair in frustration.

It had happened. In one fleeting moment it had suddenly happened. She had let her guard down and now I could see what’s been hiding behind those walls she built so high. All of her insecurities she had were now being revealed to me.

“What type of guy would want to date me anyways!? I’ve got the worst eye colour, my hair is boring and bland! Look at my thighs! They’re huge! Gosh, I’m nothing but a slob! I need to join a gym and just lose this stomach of mine!”  She cried, loud and heavy sobs leaving her lips while her chest heaved.

“Y/N!” I yelled loudly, jumping to my feet while I frowned in frustration, running my hands through my hair as I caught her attention.

“Stop! Stop! Stop! You’re absolutely insane! You’re crazy!  You don’t need to change! You don’t need to change your beautiful body! You’re perfect! You’re so beautiful that you can’t even see it! How can you not see it Y/N!?” I yelled, watching her jaw drop ever so slightly at my words.

“You don’t need a guys approval to tell you that your beautiful!” I yelled, tugging at my own hair feeling my heart pound heavily against my chest.

“I’m absolutely crazy about you! I’m so infatuated with you! I’d travel to another world just for you! I’d do anything for you, I’d go anywhere for you! Do you know how much it kills me to see you going out with the wrong guys!? When you come home from dates with the wrong guy, I’m always the one that’s picking up the pieces and you don’t even know it!” I yelled, brushing away the tears that were threatening to spill from my eyes before I slowly approach Y/N, taking her hands into mine and pulling her body closer to mine as I gazed into her eyes.

“Oh sweet, sweet, sweet Y/N. I wish you could see what I could see. When I look at you, I see a beautiful girl with shining eyes. I see a girl with a breath taking smile and a cute button nose. Your hair is gorgeous, just the way it is. I guarantee you that there are millions of girls in this world that would kill to have hair like yours. Your body is perfect. Your simply crazy if you can’t see it. You’ve got a beautiful shining soul and a heart made of pure gold.” I whisper, softly brushing away the tears that trickle down her cheeks. I noticed the way her eyes focused on me, a dazed look in her eyes as she listened.

“When we go out, people stop and stare just to gaze at your beauty. They stop and stare because they’ve never seen someone as beautiful as you. Y/N you’re like a star. A beautiful, shimmering bright star that could light up the sky. You’re so beautiful. So incredibly beautiful and I never want you to change who you are or your appearance. You’re so, so beautiful..You’re beautiful to me..I wish you could see that..” I whisper quietly as I gently cupped her cheek in my hand, pressing my forehead against hers feeling her arms wrap around my neck.

“I’m crazy about you Y/N and I don’t think I could live without you..I don’t know what this world would be like without you but I know it is a world I wouldn’t like to be in..” I say softly, gazing into her eyes that were definitely my favorite feature about her.

I watched as a smile broke onto her lips, her teary eyes now gleaming with colour.

“Joe Sugg..You’ve completely left me speechless..” She spoke quietly, her eyes beaming up at me while a small smile made its way onto my lips.

“Thank you..” She mumbled, her fingers now playing with my hair.

“You can’t thank me for stating the truth Y/N.” I explained, a playful smile now forming on her lips while the sound of our breathing filled the quiet room.

It was almost like time had slowed down. My eyes were completely hypnotized by her beauty.  I couldn’t hold myself back. I had to do it. She looked like a glorious angel and it was almost like someone had pushed me.

Our lips suddenly connected, my hands now sliding to her waist and moving to the small of her back, pulling her closely against my chest as our lips moved in a deep and passionate sync. Colours erupted through my closed eyes while the sound of fireworks rang in my ears loudly. I could feel her heart beat move in rhythm with mine as our lips moved together like they were made for one another.

Slowly I pulled back, only to mumble the words that I’ve held back for so many years.

I could feel myself smile against her lips as I whispered softly.

“My beautiful Y/N, I have loved you for so many years and I will gladly love you for many more. It would be a pleasure to spend the rest of my life telling you how much I love you..”

“Change is necessary – necessary for you to grow and to learn and to better yourself. Because everything in your life comes to an end. And, as this chapter in my life comes to an end, I look back at it with a grateful heart, and I smile. I didn’t know then but I know now, a little bit of advice is to let everyday go day by day and learn and be OK with the fact that it’s not always going to be okay but it’s going to get better.”

When's The Next History of Power Rangers Coming?

I feel like I should be screaming “STOP PAYING ME MONEY! YOU’RE UNLOCKING EVERYTHING TOO QUICKLY!” but that would be a stupid thing to say. Yes, as many of you have noticed, we have broken $1500 and thus another milestone is achieved. Really I should have pushed this one up to the $1750 slot, but here we are.

Okay, we’ve played this song and dance before - History of Power Rangers is a side series. That means it doesn’t get my attention as much as other projects… like, you know, the comic reviews that I release every single week come hell or high water. However, the question that has gnawed away at my very being since I started this little side series is, of course, “When is the next History of Power Rangers coming?”

Well, the good news is that over the last six years, I’ve gotten a lot better at writing, filming, and editing Atop the Fourth Wall. It doesn’t take me quite AS long to produce as it used to. The downside, though, is that I also have storylines, which usually take up the additional time. However, next year is an interesting little thing - there won’t technically BE a storyline since I’m planning to film the AT4W movie. That means I have more time for side projects when I’m not working on the film itself, since all of that will be filmed in a certain allotted timeframe and that just means editing the thing. However, it IS still a side project and I’ve got plenty of those to work on. Far too many, probably, and some take priority over others.

As such, if you’re upset that the dates I’ve chosen for these are a bit spread-out… you can feel free to alter your patronage. In the meantime, though, we’ve reached the milestone so I need to give dates. These dates are tentative. I will do my damndest to stick to them, but I cannot account for injury, illness, or some unforeseen complication that impedes my ability to work on it. For now, though, when is the next History of Power Rangers? Now you know.

OPERATION OVERDRIVE: 8/21/14

JUNGLE FURY: 12/25/14

RPM: 3/19/15

SAMURAI: TBD

MEGAFORCE: TBD

DINO CHARGE: TBD

((oh my hecking god simonmun and i have been crying over this song for months it was hell to edit u all better appreciate this lil hecker.

also! featuring imsomerridone as the voice of ralph!

JACK:
(spoken) Dearest darlingest Mummy and Papa:

RALPH:
(spoken) My dear Father:

BOTH:
There’s been a complication
On our voyage far from home

RALPH:
But of course, I’ll get us rescued

JACK:
But of course, I’ll rise above it

BOTH:
For I know if I work hard, I’ll be okay
Yes…
There’s been a complication
For I think I have become:

JACK:
Unusually and exceedingly peculiar
And altogether a little too obsessed with being Chief of a tribe

RALPH:
Gay

JACK:
What is this feeling
So sudden and new?

RALPH:
I felt the moment
I laid eyes on you

JACK:
My pulse is rushing

RALPH:
My head is reeling

JACK:
Kind of like hunting

BOTH:
What is this feeling?
Fervid as a flame
Does it have a name?
Yes! Loathing
Unadulterated loathing

JACK:
For your face

RALPH:
Your voice

JACK:
Your clothing

BOTH:
Let’s just say - I loathe it all
Ev'ry little trait, however small
Makes my very flesh begin to crawl
With simple utter loathing
There’s no other explanation
But a total detestation
It’s so pure, so strong!
Though I do admit it feels like love
Still I think it’s only suggestive of
The fact I will be loathing
Loathing you
My whole life long!

ANONS:
Dear Chief Jack, you are just too good
How do you stand it? I don’t think I could!
You get all up in Ralph’s face
And yeah it does seem kind of gay
But Jack, admit it, that’s okay!

JACK:
I’ve said a million times I’m straight! God!

ANONS:
Poor boys, really in a tough spot
Come on though, you guys, you know you’ve been caught
We just want to tell you
We think it’s super hot!
We love your-

BOTH:
What is this feeling 
So sudden and new? 
I felt the moment I laid eyes on you 
My pulse is rushing
My head is reeling 
Oh, what is this feeling? 
Does it have a name? 
Yes
Ahhh

ANONS (BACKGROUND):
Loathing there’s no way that this is loathing
For his face, his voice, his clothing
Please just say – you love it all
Ev'ry time you blush or your heart pounds
Makes us sure you’re someday come around
AHHH!

ALL:
Loathing!

ANONS:
loathing

BOTH: 
There’s a strange exhilaration

ANONS:
loathing

BOTH:
In this blood boiling sensation 

ANONS:
loathing

BOTH:
It’s so pure, so strong 

ANONS:
So strong!

BOTH:
Though I do admit it came on fast
Still I do believe that it can last 
And I will be…

ANONS (BACKGROUND):
Loathing…

BOTH:
Loathing 
For forever…

ANONS (BACKGROUND):
Loathing…

BOTH:
Loathing,
Truly deeply loathing you
Loathing you
My whole life long! 

ANONS:
Loathing 
Unadulterated loathing

JACK:
Boo!

RALPH:
AH!

Made with SoundCloud
2

Right so I said I was going to do this 

Here are two photos of me 

Both without any alterations, editing or filters 

One with a full face of makeup (my Agent Carter inspired makeup) 

One without 

I feel that I am always getting compliments on my selfies which is lovely but the photos you see aren’t the real me 

The selfies I put up are with makeup (bar one or two), filters, angles, colour correction sometimes, lighting, just so I can get a photo that looks better than I actually do 

Me with makeup is confident, pretty, a little bit obsessed with what I look like (are my eyebrows okay, has my lipstick smudged) 

Me without makeup is the real me, no cares, strange expressions, open, happy, insecure 

This is terrifying for me I am really insecure about my appearance I have patchy, overwaxed eyebrows that are taking an eon to grow back, I can’t leave the house without filling them in 

I don’t have an even skintone or skin type - I am the embodiment of combination skin 

I am never without spots, black/whiteheads and pimples or scarring from acne 

I have puffy undereyes with perpetual dark circles 

 My mouth isn’t even, my lips are dry, wrinkly and cracked and always have little bits of skin peeling off, they’re too light 

My hair is hardly ever acceptable - split ends, frizzy, stray strands, it never seems to sit right 

But over time, I’ve started to accept my flaws 

 Some of these things I just can’t change 

Yeah I’ll still hide behind makeup, but that’s what it’s for - to give confidence where you lack 

But yeah, I’m happy and terrified that I’m doing this, but recently I reached 3.5k followers which is incredible and I feel like I shouldn’t pretend to be someone prettier or a more optimised version of myself I should just be me 

(but probably with some makeup on)

Hello everyone! I’ve had this blog for almost 2 years now (WOW) and let me just say that I love this fandom and the people in it. Some of you are so strong and you would do anything to stick up for your friends. I’ve met and talked to so many amazing people and followed new and beautiful blogs! Some of you have amazing edits and are so creative, some of you are the sweetest people I know, and some of you are just plain hilarious, I love each and everyone of you and I’m so happy I’m followng 151 great blogs. Even if some of you aren’t following me - that’s okay because your blogs are amazing! I hope I can find new blogs soon so this list can grow but for now, here are some of my favourite blogs! P.S THIS IS GOING TO BE LONG AND PROBABLY PAINFUL, DO NOT HATE ME!!!!! ULTIMATE FOLLOW FOREVER

P.P.S Most of the time, I’m not in these paragraph things (never), and most of you might be like “Why did she write me a paragraph) Well it’s because I’m your biggest fans and I love you all loads, even if you think its creepy so :) 

Aurora: This first day I made this blog, I followed you right away, and when you followed me back I think I flipped out for a good five mintues! I’m so glad you were one of the first people I followed because you’ve made having this blog so much better! Your edits are amazing and you never fail to make me laugh and honestly if you ever deleted your blog I’d be really sad, so don’t do that! I know we don’t talk much but when we do, we’re always freaking out about something and I hope that never changes! Anyways, you’re fab and I love you, you rock don’t ever change ;D

Michaela: Even though we don’t talk very much, I’m absolutely in love with your blog (even though its mulitfandom) I remember when you first got your blog, and you’ve grown so much since then! You’re edits and your gifsets are completely amazing and to see how far you’ve come - I’m just so proud of you! You always talk to me when I make sad text posts, and I honestly love you so much for it! P.s your navigation page is sick omg

Tooma: I love you. That’s all there is to it. I’m 200% sure that I’m your biggest fan! Everytime I see your edits I just think "Wow, how does she do that?!” and then I attempt it and fail miserably, so there’s that. You are the sweetest person and you’re just so cute and energetic,  you always talk to me and that always brightens up my day! I remember first looking at your name and going “omg, that’s so sick!” I know that’s random but it really happened true story! I love you so much, you’re the best person!

Michelle: JESYSEYES, or whatever it was, I used to freak out over your blog all the time and I was so sad that you weren’t following me, but then I realized this was a side blog and your masturnialling or something like that and I freaked, just like I did with Aurora haha! I love how I got to know you better, you’re an amazing person (AND YOU’RE SO PRETTY PS.)  From what I’ve seen, you’ve been through so much and you still manage to stay positive and be happy! I love you

Cece: I used to be in the hearts in your description but I’m gone now D: I still love you though, you’re one my favourite people in this fandom! I know we don’t talk very often, we used to but I still love you and I’m always here for you, you’re such a strong person and you were there for me when I needed someone, and I can’t thank you enough for that! I’m so happy I got to know you better, and I now know that if I ever have to pick in between one thing and Jadesy - it’ll always have to be Jadesy (they’re just so adorable)

Camille: We don’t really talk, like ever. But i’m absolutely in love with your blog and I’m a secret fan of yours (obviously, why wouldn’t I be) I can’t even begin to explain how much I wish we could talk more! You just seem so friendly and always in such good spirits, you’re never really in the drama that blogs have and you just continue editing and being all perfect and such, I hope I get to know you better soon!

Okay now, for blogs, bolded ones are my absolute favourites BUT THAT DOESN’T MEAN ANYONE ELSE IS LESS IMPORTANT!!!!!!!!

Jade: jdaethirlwall | thirlily | thirldollz | thirlboob | jadeliciouss | thirles | adorewall | jadeamellia | jadelust | cosmicthirlwall| thirls | thugwall | ofjadeys

Jesy: jesybitches | jesmindas | wowjesy |

Leigh-Anne: pinnockurl | pinncock | leighstripper | omfgpinnock | cosmicleigh | pinnockes |

Perrie: ofperrys | perriehipster | perriesicle | perries | stoperrie | perriezs | perriencess | amorperrie | edwads | perrieemix

Little Mix: mr-bows | leiqhade | fireupthatrunway | mixerprince | cannonwall | pandjscurry | mixersmagic

Other: diannagrons | jenniferslawrence | okziams​ | asamizdrennka | zerrey |

+blogroll

Fall (Part 2/?)

This part is almost 9,000 words (I wanted 10,000 but it didn’t work out that way. Harumph). 

I hope everyone enjoys!!
We get to meet Rae’s coworkers this chapter ^.^

TRIGGER WARNING: non-consensual sex (NOT in detail but detailed description of events leading up to it)

CHAPTER TWO

Whenever I look back
On the best days of my life
I think I saw them all on TV

I am so homesick now
For someone that I never knew
I am so homesick
For some place I will never be

It actually takes me three days to get back to work. My face is mostly healed and looks alright under some makeup, but my arm has hurt longer than ever before. And it was still a deep color when I woke up to Liam making noise in the bathroom this morning. I don’t know if my body is giving up on mending quickly or if Liam is just getting stronger. Both are terrifying thoughts, so I try to push them away as I apply the second layer of cover-up evenly. If I could ever best Chloe at anything now, it would be makeup. My abilities have grown tremendously these past four years.

I line my top eyelids in dark black and swipe mascara over my lashes. Ten strokes on my left, twelve on the right to make them look even. I powder my face and neck for a matte look and smear some tinted lip balm against my chapped lips. The inside of my mouth is still tender and swollen, but it’s not noticeable to the casual observer.

Keep reading