okay its not really a betrayal

ᴛᴀɴɢʟᴇᴅ sᴇɴᴛᴇɴᴄᴇ ᴍᴇᴍᴇ
      sᴇɴᴅ ᴏɴᴇ ( ᴏʀ ᴍᴏʀᴇ ) ᴛᴏ ᴍʏ ᴍᴜsᴇ!


  • ❝ This is the story of how I died. ❞
  • ❝ That’s when people usually start to look for a miracle. ❞
  • ❝ And for that one moment, everything was perfect. ❞
  • ❝ Why can’t I go outside? ❞
  • ❝ The outside world is a dangerous place filled with horrible, selfish people. You must stay here where you’re safe. ❞
  • ❝ All the things we’ve seen and its only eight in the morning. ❞
  • ❝ Stop taking everything so seriously. ❞
  • ❝ Stop with the mumbling, you know how I feel about the mumbling. ❞
  • ❝ I distinctly remember your birthday was last year. ❞
  • ❝ That’s the funny thing about birthdays, they’re kind of an annual thing. ❞
  • ❝ I can’t believe that after all we’ve been through together, you don’t trust me. ❞
  • ❝ Okay, okay, okay…I’ve got a person in my closet. ❞
  • ❝ I do hate leaving you after an argument, especially when I’ve done absolutely nothing wrong. ❞
  • ❝ You are not leaving this tower! Ever! ❞
  • ❝ Ugh, great. Now I’m the bad guy. ❞
  • ❝ I’ll be back in three days time. I love you very much, dear. ❞
  • ❝ I know why you’re here and I’m not afraid of you. ❞
  • ❝ The only thing I want to do with your hair is to get out of it. ❞
  • ❝ Who are you, and how did you find me? ❞
  • ❝ I know not who you are nor how I came to find you, but may I just say…hi. How ya doin’? ❞
  • ❝ I was being chased, I saw a tower, I climbed it. End of story. ❞
  • ❝ I have made the decision to trust you. ❞
  • ❝ Tomorrow evening they will light the night sky with these lanterns. ❞
  • ❝ When I promise something, I never ever break that promise. ❞
  • ❝ I didn’t want to have to do this but you leave me no choice. ❞
  • ❝ Well that’s okay, what she doesn’t know won’t kill her. ❞
  • ❝ I’m a despicable human being. ❞
  • ❝ You know I can’t help but notice you seem a little at war with yourself here. ❞
  • ❝ This is part of growing up. ❞
  • ❝ Stay calm. It can probably smell fear. ❞
  • ❝ Haven’t any of you ever had a dream? ❞
  • ❝ Go. Live your dream. ❞
  • ❝ Someone get me a glass, ‘cause I just found me a tall drink of water. ❞ 
  • ❝ Let’s just assume for the moment that everyone in here doesn’t like me. ❞
  • ❝ I have got to get me one of these. ❞
  • ❝ I was going to offer you something worth one thousand crowns, would have made you rich beyond belief. ❞
  • ❝ A gift like that, well, it has to be protected. ❞
  • ❝ You can’t tell anyone about this, okay? It could ruin my reputation. ❞
  • ❝ Well a fake reputation is all a man has. ❞
  • ❝ Why would he/she like you, come on now really. ❞
  • ❝ Look at you! Do you think that he/she’s impressed? ❞
  • ❝ I just listened to the sound of complete and utter betrayal and followed that. ❞
  • ❝ All good things to those who wait. ❞
  • ❝ Well I hope you came to apologize. ❞ 
  • ❝ I need you not to get him arrested. ❞
  • ❝ What if its not everything I dreamed it would be? ❞
  • ❝ And what if it is? What do I do then? ❞
  • ❝ You get to go find a new dream. ❞
  • ❝ I’m not scared anymore. ❞
  • ❝ We want him/her instead. ❞
  • ❝ The world is dark and selfish and cruel. If it finds even the slightest ray of sunshine, it destroys it. ❞
  • ❝ I’m the lost princess. ❞
  • ❝ I’ve spent my entire life hiding from people who would use me for my power. ❞
  • ❝ But I should have been hiding from you. ❞
  • ❝ Where will you go? He/She won’t be there for you. ❞
  • ❝ That criminal is to be hanged for his crimes. ❞
  • ❝ You want me to be the bad guy? Fine. Now I’m the bad guy. ❞
  • ❝ Let’s see how fast you can run. ❞
  • ❝ We’re going where no one will ever find you again. ❞
  • ❝Our secret will die with him. ❞
  • ❝ I will never stop trying to get away from you. ❞
  • ❝ I can’t let you die. ❞
  • ❝ But if you do this, then you will die. ❞
  • ❝ You were my new dream. ❞
  • ❝ Did I ever tell you I got a thing for brunettes? ❞
  • ❝ After years and years of asking, and asking, and asking, I finally said yes. ❞
a little modernish klangst

sooooo i know i havent really posted BUT i have a good reason being school graduation!! anyways this just came to me and it broke my heart so i decided to share with you all. It not that good but still hope you enjoy!! 

~~~~

Lance never would have thought that he would be leaving Keith. In fact, Lance was sure that Keith would be the one leaving him. Funny how things turned out to be, right?

Their relationship started to go downhill during a very important moment in Keith’s life. Keith had been a nervous wreck when his astronaut test (is that even real??? Idk it is real in this au) was coming up. He kept going on and on about how he wasn’t going to pass it which eventually led to him towards a bad negative slump. He would tell Lance that he wasn’t good enough for him and how he never gave Lance anything when Lance had given him everything (Lance maybe was gonna be a doctor??? His career was already set). He even went as far as to telling him that they should break up because “You can do better than me.” That’s when Lance snapped, in a good way. He told Keith he was going to pass it and that he loved him or else why would he have stayed with him all these years? He told Keith that he knew that he was going to become a great astronaut and that he believed in him and whatnot. Then, they hugged and made up and all that sappy stuff.

Fast-forward to a few weeks when Keith had received his award letter and met with his new co-workers. The first few days they were both ecstatic. Keith was going to be an astronaut! Lance was so happy for him. He did his best to support Keith in whatever ways he could because he could see that Keith fit in perfectly. However, when Keith decided to hang out with his new co-workers more and more, Lance knew something was off. Keith slowly stared to come home later and would often never answer his phone. He would not show up to their dates and would excuse himself whenever he did. Lance could feel the distance between them growing as time flew by and would often ponder whether Keith still loved him. (he often asked Keith this and would receive an “of course I love you.”) Lance didn’t know what to do. (He often felt lonely and sad which was definitely not good… leading to him becoming depressed)

It wasn’t until one day when Lance stumbled upon Keith and his friends, that his heart broke completely. He had been shopping (a thing that now made him feel slightly better since someone decided to ditch him) when he noticed them and of course he went to greet them. Lance should have noticed something was of when Keith ignored him. He should have left but he told himself that it was fine even when Keith rejected his kiss. He was introducing himself (Hi, my name is Lance and im Keith’s boyfriend) when Keith quickly interrupted him and told them that Lance was just a “friend.” Lance was fine, right? (WRONG)

Lance felt like he was punched in the gut and his breathe was knocked out. Did he really hear, right? Had Keith, his Keith who was proud of who he was and never in his life hid his sexuality, really tried to hide their relationship?? He wanted to scream and cry at the same time. He put on a stoic face (KEIT WYD???) and abruptly excused himself. Keith made no move to go after him.

Lance cried (A LOT) when he got home. I mean, who wouldn’t be when their own boyfriend somewhat rejected them?? He let out the sadness and betrayal from his system. (it took longer than what he intended but oh well) He couldn’t believe that Keith had done that. Once he was more in control, he made a decision that would change his life. He packed all of his belongings, making sure that he didn’t leave anything personal behind, (Keith was somewhere idk okay??? He just didn’t go home, igues?) and walked out the door without looking back.

Why Vinnie and Lorna will NEVER work out, and why she and Nicky are endgame

Hello everyone,

I know that most of you spent the weekend binge watching season 5, and I think this would be the perfect time to share with you all, why I believe, that Lorna and Vinnie will never work out. 

1.Vinnie still lives at home with his parents. TLC said it perfectly with the 90s hit, No Scrubs. Living at home with your family, and bringing home a new baby that you had with your wife who is serving a year in prison is a stressful situation. I am going to assume that Vinnie does not make enough money to afford his own place which is why he is still living at home with parents. Since that is the case, how is he supposed to afford a home (preferably a 2 bedroom, on a low salary)? Lorna will not able to work for a few months, being a convicted felon, therefore, they would virtually have no income (Lorna’s mother is ill, and I don’t think her father works). Add that with a screaming one year old, and their marriage is doomed.

2. Vinnie doesn’t know why Lorna really went to prison. How could you possibly say you are completely in love with someone when you don’t really know everything about them. She lied to him about Christopher (I think that was really horrible, but shows the extent of her mental illness), and even though Nicky gave a tutorial on how to handle Lorna when she spins out, its going to be very different living with that mental illness of the day to day basis, and he and Lorna have never even lived together. They are virtually strangers, because he doesn’t understand her the way Nicky does.

3. Lorna cheated on him. SHE CHEATED! While I am okay with her having sex with Nicky, its still a betrayal that has the potential to end any marriage, and when Vinnie finds out about it, he may leave her. (He also doesn’t know that she has been with a woman before, and that she even has feelings for one). Even though he says he is going to be there for her, and the baby now, he still doesn’t know that she was unfaithful, which means that Lorna is still lying to her husband.

4. Lorna has a dependency on Nicky that exceeds friendship. As we can remember from the 2002 movie Brown Sugar, Lorna, like Dre, had an unusual closeness, and bond with his best friend Sidney Shaw. Whenever he had a problem, he went to Sidney first instead of his wife. Sidney was the one who knew him best, and was able to comfort him when we was worried about his new record label. Also his wife Reese, was angered by this closeness, and accused Sidney of being in love with Dre (She was by the way). In the end Dre, and Sidney ended up together because as Reese said, “He lets you in, in a way that he hasn’t let me in, and all of the secrets I have to beg for, you already know.” We can apply the same theory to Lorna and Nicky. Since Lorna is married, their closeness, and dependency can considered emotional cheating. Emotionally, (as well as physically), Lorna is having an affair. Nicky is the one who knows her best, and the one who is able to truly comfort her when she feels unsafe, or unloved. Whenever Lorna has a problem its Nicky she turns to, and this level of dependency is problematic in a marriage. Vinnie will feel cheated, unappreciated, and ignored because I GUARANTEE you, Lorna will make all of her major decisions, after speaking with Nicky, not her husband. This will undoubtedly cause the demise of their marriage. 

5. Lorna still has feelings for Nicky (I believe she loves her and so does Yael Stone). Lorna admitted to having feelings for Nicky, and her actions, and dependency on her says that she loves her, and as we all know, while some marriages do work with multiple people (polyamorous relationships), that is only if every party involved is aware, and in love with each other. Vinnie is not aware of Lorna’s love for Nicky or Nicky’s intense love for her.  This is another case of Lorna lying to her husband, and basing her marriage on false trust, therefore in the long run, it will not work.

6. Vinnie has not proven that he is truly capable of handling Lorna’s mental illness, and a new baby. As we all know, Vinnie had to be convinced by Nicky to be there for Lorna, and their new baby, (although this is in part influenced by Lorna’s jealous episode). Nicky on the other hand, after learning she was really pregnant, immediately offered support, even said that they (her and Lorna) would figure it out, that she would help her through her pregnancy. Nicky proved that even though she doesn’t like children, and the idea of Lorna having a baby terrified her, that she would still be there for her, because she loves her and she would eventually love her baby. Nicky proves her commitment to Lorna even though she herself suffers from intimacy issues. Also, as we have seen throughout the last 5 seasons, that Nicky is the only one who can calm Lorna down, and bring her back to reality. Nicky forces her to distinguish between fantasy, and reality, while still remaining supportive, and empathetic. Vinnie hasn’t done that (granted he had the same response I probably would have had to Lorna accusing him of sleeping with her sister), Lorna needs Nicky in order to remain stable. When Lorna is with her, she doesn’t have jealous, insane, spin outs, Nicky is always able to keep her grounded, feeling safe, loved, and secure. Vinnie doesn’t offer any of those things, and while he is a normal millennial, he is not the right person for her because he simply does not know her. This is why Lorna and Vinnie are not endgame, Lorna and Nicky are. 

So, spoilers ahead, so don’t read if you haven’t watched Civil War yet.

I saw a lot of discussion of this moment and I’m really happy to see there are a lot of people, who understood the depth and the emotional charge of it.

I just want to make two points, which define this situation:

1. Bucky Barnes IS A VICTIM.

2. Tony Stark HAD EVERY RIGHT to go so completely mad with emotion.

People usually tend to make these points mutually exclusive, but they are not. They make this situation what it is. Because it doesn’t have a clear answer or a villain.

I agree with people, who found Black Panther smart and wise, composed. Yes. And it’s interesting how in the end Tony has the same reason to act against Bucky Barnes, as Black Panther had in the beginning of a movie. BUT IT’S NOT THE SAME.

First of all, T’challa’s father wasn’t killed by Bucky AT ALL. Black Panther overcomes his hatred and rage, seeing what happens with heroes, who are consumed by it. However, he HAS a legit person to blame for that crime, a person, who will pay for his crime, rotting in prison. It won’t bring his father back, but the killer will PAY. Moreover, let’s not forget that right after the death of his father T’challa was hellbent on killing Bucky. Without judge and jury. He had a whole movie to embrace and overcome his rage and hurt and he got closure.

TONY STARK WILL NEVER GET CLOSURE FOR THE DEATH OF HIS PARENTS.

It hit him so hard, because he was already in a vulnerable place. After all the events of Civil War, after the visit to prison and General’s threats, he comes to Steve and Bucky TO HELP, and then he is shown A FUCKING SECURITY FOOTAGE OF BOTH OF HIS PARENTS DYING. And not in a car crash, they are brutally murdered. Wow, gee, is there any reason for him to get emotional?

His “villain” will never pay for the death of his parents. You can say, “okay, Barnes was brainwashed by HYDRA, so HYDRA is the villain, so blame them”. It doesn’t work like that, unfortunately. The Winter Soldier killed his parents, deprived him of any chance to reconcile with his father, choked his mother to death, and there is NOBODY to answer for that, because Bucky Barnes is also a victim. It’s so fucked up.

And at that moment Tony just snapped. It can also be argued that he could see Barnes as the reason the Avengers split, because really, Steve’s priority at the time was not to keep the team together, but to protect his old friend. And now this. Is Tony justified to KILL Bucky? No. Is his reaction understandable? Yes.

I would only like to add one more thing. Steve ‘I don’t like my teammates keeping secrets from me’ Rogers SHOULD have told Tony sooner. Maybe NOT WITH BUCKY PRESENT, you know. MAYBE WHEN THEY WERE STILL TEAMMATES, trusting each other. Would it have gone over peacefully? No. Tony wouldn’t just say ‘okay, so, your buddy was brainwashed, totally don’t blame him’. But it wouldn’t have been this awful mix of hurt, rage and BETRAYAL. It was such a horrible way to find out.

So, yeah, Steve, totally judging you on this one. You were really protecting just yourself and even that at the end didn’t work.

LIAR

God, can you even imagine how Namjoon must have felt seeing the word liar scrawled in blood red paint outside the phone booth? Can you even begin to fathom the dark depths of despair and the impotent frustration that filled his lungs like water until he’s drowning in his own guilt? He promised he would save him.

LIAR

He tried so damn hard. He put everything he had into trying to open that door. He put his all into trying to prise off those chains, desperately struggling against the unforgiving metal. But it doesn’t bend and unlike people it doesn’t break and he’s left once again locked out. He promised he would never leave him alone again.

LIAR

He knows, he just knows it’s Taehyung calling, feels him calling out somewhere deep in his soul. He has to help him, He has to save him. If he won’t no one else will. Taehyung is his light, his sun, his everything and when the sun goes out it takes the world with it, nothing can live without light. He promised, he has to, he has to-

LIAR

The chains don’t budge and frustrated tears burn his eyes like acid, blurring the world around him. He may be blind but the world isn’t kind enough to deafen him too. He can still hear he endless ringing of the damn telephone as sure as if it was Taehyung himself screaming for help. It taunts him, haunts him, mocks him, reminding him of his pathetic helplessness. He promised.

LIAR

It’s all his fault. 

He couldn’t help Taehyung when he was alive, though he saw the bruises, blooming like flowers across his skin, a garden of hurt.

He couldn’t catch him when he jumped, all he could do was sit and watch as the ocean swallowed him whole.

and he can’t save him now

Taehyung is still falling

endlessly

LIAR

you said you would save him

but

you

can’t

all Namjoon can do is stand, stranded outside a locked telephone box, the shrill sound ringing in his ears and a voice repeating the word liar over and over again like some maddening chant.

and the very worst part is this:

the voice in his head?

the one so filled with hurt,

 so heavy with betrayal 

and anger 

and pain

that voice?

it’s Taehyungs

Yesterday on Star Wars: Rebels
  • Evil Space Dad: I need to be protected from Vader. Dude, he's scary as balls. I heard he killed the Chosen One. And I could barely kill that guy's master.
  • Blackberry small child person: Sounds cool. I'll ask my Space Dad if it's okay.
  • Space Dad: It's really really not okay. I mean really. Don't come crying to me when...
  • Evil Space Dad: Join me and make me your new Space Dad!
  • Blackberry small child person: Curse your sudden but inevitable AND VERY OBVIOUS betrayal!
  • Vader: The sun come out, tomorrow. Bet your bottom dollar that tomorrow, there'll be blood.
  • Space Aunt: You killed *my* Space Dad. Prepare to die.
  • Vader: Um yes. Little Orphan Ani. I totally killed him. And he whined in the most unmanly way when I did. Chosen One my ass.
  • Space Aunt: Oh you are so going to get it.
  • Evil Temple: ZOOOL MOTHAFUCKAS ZOOOOL
  • <Later>
  • Blackberry small child person: Take my hand.
  • Space Aunt: I have to save the villain!
  • Blackberry small child person: But he killed Cool Uncle Anakin and shit we can get rid of him forever.
  • Space Aunt: Just go.
  • <Much later>
  • Blackberry small child person: And it was on that day that I realized that evil triumphs... because good is a load of pansy shit.
10

Feb 27: Favorite Season- Season 3- How Long Till We Call This Love?

On her birthday, Damon gives Elena the one thing that represented hope for her and Stefan. Which only made her realized the depth of her feelings for Damon.

“I got you something. I know I promised not to buy you anything so don’t worry, I didn’t pay for it.”
“You stole it?”
“No… I found it.”
“My necklace…I thought I’d never see it again.”
“Alaric found it in his loft, I figured you’d be happy to get it back.”
“I am happy. Thank you.”
“You’re welcome.”

How long till we call this love?

Elena made Damon go out into the mountains on a full moon to help her find Stefan. Which only ended up putting his life in danger. And she worried.

“What made you changed you mind, Elena?”
“I didn’t want to see you get hurt, okay. I was- I was worried about you.”
“Thanks”
“Yes, I worry about you. Why do even have to hear me say it?”
“Because when I drag my brother from the edge and deliver him back to you, I want you to remember the things you felt while he was gone.”

How long till we call this love?

Damon drives her to Chicago in the attempt to bring Stefan home. Offering himself up as a replacement to Klaus. That’s how much he loves her. That’s how much he loves them both. 

“You want a partner in crime? Forget Stefan. I’m so much more fun.”

How long till we call this love?

They cook chili together. They laugh. They smile. Only for them to end the night yelling at each other. Challenging each other.

“You can’t do this anymore, Damon. Not in this town. Not around me." 
"Why not? Nothing I haven’t done before.”
“Why is it suddenly so important for everyone to keep me in check?”
“Because I don’t want you to be what other people think that you are.”
“What? A monster? Sorry to disappoint you, Elena, but last time I checked I was still a vampire." 
"Yes, I just wish that you didn’t have to act like one.”
“I am not Stefan. How about you stop trying to turn me into him.”

How long till we call this love?

Damon leaves town. Elena has what can only be described as a nightmare of a night. Beaten, bitten, and drained of blood. And Damon come homes to rescue her. Regretting every second that he was gone.

“Where were you, Damon?”
“I shouldn’t have left.
 I promise you. I will never leave you again.”

How long till we call this love?

Elena is afraid that Stefan is going to break her. So, she asked Damon to help her lock him up. He see her fear. He sees are hard she is training so that no one is able to ever hurt her again. So, he helps her out with a little tip and some reassurance. Which only causes the heat and the  tension caused by their attraction each other to build.

“…that’s your way to a vampire’s heart. I’ll do whatever it is you need me to do, Elena. No ones going to hurt you. Especially, not my brother.”

How long till we call this love?

They end the day together. He doesn’t get off her bed. So, she climbs in next to him anyways. She tells him that her brother loves him because she knows this because she loves him too. She falls asleep next to him. And he looks at her and takes it all in as she does.

“I think you’re going to be the one to save him from himself. It won’t be because he loves me. It’ll be because he loves you. Can I tell you the rest tomorrow?
“Sure”

How long till we call this love?

Their plan to take down Klaus goes all wrong. Leaving Damon angry and hopeless. Elena calms him. She tells him that they will be alright. He tells her there is no hope for Stefan. She doesn’t care. They have each other. Which makes whatever they have to deal with or come to terms with easy. 

“I had him, Elena. I had Klaus. This could have all been over!”
“Hey…Hey…Hey, listen to me. We’ll survive this. We always survive. Trust me.”
“We’re never getting Stefan back. You know that. Don’t you?”
Then we’ll let him go. Okay? We’ll have to let him go.“

How long till we call this love?

They have a horrible day. Jeremy’s life is in danger. Alaric almost dies. Jeremy chops someones head off. So, she had Damon compel him away to Denver. But at the end of the day, they have each other. And they find a way to make the day end okay. So, they put the guilt they carry over for having feelings for each other aside for one moment and they kiss. Because they both had crappy days and they needed it. 

"No. No. You know what? If I’m going to feel guilty about something, I’m going to feel guilty about this.”

How long till we call this love?

Stefan uses her as a pawn against Klaus in the most traumatizing way possible and then leaves her all alone on the road. So, Damon picks her up and takes her home. He defends his brother’s actions and then asks her if she was really okay. And she looks at him like maybe if they kissed, she really would be. But then she feels that sense of betrayal kick in, so she stops herself.

“You can’t kiss me again.”
“I know.”
“I can’t. Its not right.”
“No, its right. Just not right now”

How long till we call this love?

Damon teases her. He tells Bonnie that they kissed because he knows she hasn’t talked about it with anyone. And he wants her to. He wants her to talk about it and think about it and admit to herself what she feels for him.

“We kissed. Now its weird.”

How long till we call this love?

Elena is invited to a ball hosted by the originals. Ester wants to talk to her privately but Damon won’t have it. Its too dangerous. He can’t let that happen. She formulates a plan behind his back and does it anyways. And you can tell that it hurts her but it was the only way to get what she wanted. Damon is furious. And when he tells his reason, it overwhelms her. He overwhelms her. His love consumes her. And she loves him for it. And that terrifies her. Which causes her to say something she didn’t mean. Because him loving her was never the problem. It was her loving him that was.

“Sorry for trying to keep you alive. Clearly, Stefan doesn’t give a crap anymore.”
“What? So now you’re mad at me for including Stefan?”
“No, I’m mad at you because I love you.”
“Well, maybe that’s the problem.”

How long till we call this love?

Damon sleeps with Rebekah. And Elena finds out about it. And it bothers her to no end. So, she goes around and rants about it to everyone all day. Including Alaric. Because Rebekah got back at her in the one way that annoyed her most. 

“Isn’t that what you want? Revenge? Because I pretended to like you and then I stuck a dagger in your back. I mean, that’s why you spelt with Damon, isn’t it? That’s why you’re tormenting me? Because I hurt your feelings.”

How long till we call this love?

Damon gives up the fight. He sees that Stefan is coming around and wants Elena back so he lets her go. And resorts back to being “the bad guy” again to try and push her away. He tries to help his brother in ways he knows she wouldn’t approve. But she doesn’t nudge. That doesn’t shake her. Its way too late for that now. 

“And Damon?”
“Damon just sort of snuck up on me. He got under my skin and no matter what I do I just… I can’t shake him.”
“Once you fall in love with someone I don’t know if… I don’t know if you can ever shake them.”

How long till we call this love?

Damon’s life is in danger. Again. Rebekah takes him in the middle of their plan to take them all down. Elena worries. She is ready to drop everything to go and save him. She even uses logic that she has only ever had with Damon. And at the end of the day, she can’t look Stefan in eye and tell him that she isn’t in love with Damon. 

“What he would want and what we should do are two different things.”

How long till we call this love?

Damon and Elena go on a road trip together to bring back Jeremy. Elena using it as an excuse to “explore” her feelings for Damon. Which she knows she has. Its irrefutable. She just can’t admit it. Because of the expectations she thinks people have on her. Because of the expectations she has for herself. Her feelings for him terrify her because Damon lives his life in reckless abandon. And she isn’t suppose to love someone like that. But she yearns to live a life like that. To live a life freely. A life without the pressure of living up to anyones’ expectations of her. So, she takes a moment for it. And she kisses him. She lets her feelings she’s trapped inside for so long explode out of her. And she kisses him with reckless abandon.

“Elena…”
“Don’t…”
“Why not?”

How long till we call this love?

Elena falls back and bangs her head hard. Who is there to help her up? Damon. Who does Elena clutch onto and lean on while exiting the room the others take down Klaus in? Damon. Who is the one that makes the decision of choosing between them the most difficult decision she has ever had to make? Damon. Because she wants to choose Damon. She does. But if she chooses Damon, she would feel like that would be a betrayal to Stefan. And that she would lose him because of it.  You can see it in her eyes as she talks to both of them at her doorway. Looking at Stefan every time she mentions losing one of them. But if she chooses Stefan. She knows that whatever she has between her and Damon would have to end. And she doesn’t want to lose that either. 

“And I just don’t know what I’m suppose to do… I mean… If I chose one of you, then I lose the other. And I’ve lost so many people I… I can’t bare the thought of losing one of you.”

How long till we call this love?

Elena spends the day faced with this difficult decision. Exploring her feelings. Describing them to Matt. And when Stefan comes back, she wants to let him go. She was ready for it. But she puts it off because it can wait. So, he kisses her for the first time in what has been months because he knows what she was about to do and she loses all the strength she had to do it. And she changes her mind. Because he makes the fear of her feelings for Damon easier to bare. So, she lets Damon go. Despite making her feel alive. Despite how being with him completely takes her over. She lets him go. Because her fear in the way she feels for him. Her fear in the unknown is too much for her. She wasn’t ready for it. She wasn’t strong enough yet. So, she makes up her mind and goes against her heart. 

“The problem is Damon… When I’m with him, he just consumes me.”

How long till we call this love?

How long? It was love from the start.

“It was my birthday. Damon and I spent the entire summer looking for Stefan. And I was trying to put on a good face because Caroline was throwing this party for me, but I was just so sad. I was two seconds from deciding I wasn’t gonna go, I was gonna leave the room, until Damon walked in to give my birthday gift. It was the necklace that Stefan had given me. I’d lost it, but Damon knew what that necklace meant to me… what it meant about my feelings for Stefan. Even though he loved me, he gave me the one thing that represented hope for me and his brother. I knew how much it hurt him. But he did it. It was the most selfless he’d ever been. And in that moment, I loved him. I mean… I didn’t want to. It terrified me. But for that moment… I loved him.”

“The sun is filling up the room, 

                                 and I can hear you dreaming. 

                                                           Do you feel the way I do, right now?" 

Everytime someone tries to physically stop me from stimming or reinforce ‘quiet hands’ I feel absolutely thunderstuck and dismayed. 

Theres something strangely chilling about it. My breath catches in my throat and its like someone has tipped a bucket of icy water over my head. 

It feels almost like a betrayal, especially when its someone I trusted. 

I don’t think allistic people really know how that feels. The emotional and almost physical impact of it in the moment it happens and the feelings of confusion hurt and distrust afterwards. 

About NYCC/6.03/etc.

So, I don’t really know what to say about the panel. I wasn’t planning on going because I knew the ep was going to be a shtity one, but I did and wasn’t mistaken. How they thought this egregious betrayal of basically everything the show worked so hard to build in its first few years was okay is beyond me. Sure, the process started before now, but 6.03 I think puts the nail in the coffin.

Emma looking wistfully at Hook making faces at Ashley’s kid (which… Hook would never do that; it’s as contrived as his bullshit speech to Belle on the Jolly Roger last week) and smiling sadly like she’s desperate for a kid with him when she doesn’t even remember she’s already got a son half the time was disgusting. As was the bursting into Archie’s office to talk about how “jealous” she was of seeing Ashley’s happy family because Hook deserves a happy ending she may not be able to give him since the whole “Savior’s vision of death” is hanging over her head is fucking stupid. She wants to live with Hook and he wants to live with her - funny, since they’ve barely spent five minutes together not in mortal danger and therefore barely know each other, but whatever. Archie asked her straight up if she was barging in to talk about her comment about Regina, to which Emma snottily replied, “I don’t want to talk about Regina.” Huh, well… okay.

Hook teaching Henry to sword fight was another contrived bullshit scene, given that Neal and Charming have already taught him and Hook has zero interest in Henry beyond belittling him (as evidenced last season) and perhaps using him as a vehicle to get closer to Emma. Kewl dad material, much parenting skills… not.

As for the #nohomo extravaganza during the VERY brief Q&A, it just makes me so sad for this show and its lost potential, for the fans who’ve loved the character of Emma and watched her systematically destroyed so that she’s unrecognizable, for Hollywood and society as a whole which obviously still isn’t ready for a tale like Emma and Regina’s — yes, romantic Swan Queen (which I’ve never been naive enough to believe would come to pass on screen, and that was okay until…), but also just the relationship between these two incredibly strong, powerful women who started off as enemies and eventually became allies, friends and yes, on a certain level, soulmates who literally SACRIFICED THEIR LIVES FOR ONE ANOTHER WITHOUT THINKING and are working together to raise a son (though “working” is an extremely loose term on Emma’s behalf over the past season).

Here’s the thing: yes, Regina and Snow are becoming much closer, and that’s wonderful. There’s a shared history there and a lot of baggage that they’re beginning to work through as a family, and that’s a beautiful story to see being told. However, that doesn’t negate Regina’s closeness with Emma — Regina is perfectly capable of being close with two different people simultaneously in very different ways. To cheapen that bond is just a giant fuck you to us and to the characters themselves. Lest we forget that the most vulnerable and open Regina has ever been has been with Emma. Hello, the conversation in the apartment in New York? Am I taking crazy pills?

Plus, did they ever think that Regina seems closer to Snow these days because Emma is a shadow of her former self who’s content to follow Hook around like a lost puppy? When Emma closes herself off as she has, Regina can only ask, “Emma, are you okay?” so many times before she eventually gives her the space she clearly needs to work through her shit. The sad part is, Emma “working through her shit” is tantamount to “moving in with Hook so they can have lots of CS babies and she can forget who she is and any semblance of who she ever was.” Sounds like a recipe for a great show.

At this point, I don’t have much hope left for Emma on her own, let alone for Emma’s relationship with Regina on even a platonic level. Sure, maybe there’s some wildcard scene coming at the halfway point. Maybe this is all smoke and mirrors to throw us off some wonderful SQ scene that will just blow our socks off, but I’m not dumb enough to hold out hope for it. I’m here for twice the Lana and even that pull is tenuous at best. I can’t wait until that beautiful, wonderful human being and actress finds another vehicle for her talents, because she deserves the very best.

aight but you guys arent getting this update. youre like “huh, interesting” “nice art” and “aw sweet”

you guys aren’t truly understanding this update. this is the first update at which i’ve actually cried - sobbed.

the terezi we see is a terezi that never had anything bad happen to her. ever, really. karkat never mistreated her by treating her like an object, dave never broke her apart by telling her her troll quadrants were silly, her best friend in the entire world never left her wondering what could have been. and she never wondered until now. she never wondered about what she did before - what she did in the future - what else she did right then and in that moment.

honestly, her vriska probably even thought that she was a strong person, despite what terezi says in this update. she thinks for a brief period that she’s better off this way but never really thinks about it until she’s alone. and she realizes, that even fatal mistakes

are ones you learn from

they shape you

they hurt, but theyre necessary

and suddenly she breaks through the wall of ignorance that was keeping her in her own little bubble, so to speak, and broke straight through into ever other iteration of hers’ consciousnesses. most weren’t important. except one. and she remembers.

she remembers the her that was thrown into the trash by everyone she ever loved and trapped from the only one who cared by her own life, the terezi that was tossed around like a piece of fucking trash until she believed she was trash, then was saved and probably thought that somehow she had manipulated those who tried to spare her life

the timeline bubble she is in

thats the one where lilska is

her best friend who shes missed for three fucking years

and they see each other

theyve both changed so much but they can tell that its their best friend standing in front of them

i can only imagine what that feeling is like - the feeling of defeating chance. they couldnt save their own lives. its impossible. but thats okay, because theyre together - with the person they deserve to be with, the only person in paradox space who can really care for them. no other characters in homestuck have ever had this fucking chance or this relationship, and yes, even nepeta and equius.

this is the most important reuinion in homestuck.

its been done time and time again.

but this is the best, most accurate way to say

that not even death, betrayal, time, change, depression, friends, family

none of these things can ever really destroy a friendship if its true

~War Aftermath~((Reserved au rp with crimsonaeon))

Journal entry 23,

We did it. After fighting the war and making amends, we won the war. Everyone was happy since we all worked with Aeon and his team. We got rid of the betrayers and shows our part. Everything was okay but……..during the war, my sister was badly hurt after her final attack on the head leader. I never seen her lose so much blood but she really was a hero. She sacrificed her self to save everyone even Aeon’s Team.

We placed her in a sealed room so she can heal but its been months. Melina, I wish you open your eyes…………

Mel

He was reading a entry he did, looking at a  crystal glass chamber filled with liquid inside. His sister was floating inside as wires and a mask was seen. A few burns were still visible but not as bad. “Sis….."Mel was always visiting her but seeing her, she was sleeping with arms over her chest as if she was resting, black hair floating around her.

anonymous asked:

I know this is a hugggeee stretch and no pressure really pls ignore me but maybe you can write a mini mini extension of betrayal in its simplest form? i really love it and i have this small hope you can do more with it. . ok pls forgive me

Hm, I guess I will do one, lol. It’s been like, two years? I have to force myself to write anyway. You’re a sweet anon, and while I’m not really interested in anything to do with Betrayal in its Simplest Form anymore (besides read the beautiful, kind reviews I receive), I’ll write a small extension :) (Okay, everybody knows now that my “small” means very long because I have a problem).

Betrayal In Its Simplest Form Mini Sequel (AKA my worst written story sequel)

Warning: Trigger of mentions of abuse and violence

Pairing: Akashi / Kuroko (I mean, I assume you would know)


There were days that the memories struck him from behind. When it did, it took his breath away. It stole him of his senses, and it scorched him like never before deep within his heart; and when the reminders that he desperately locked in its dungeon when the moon rose, bright and menacing, and highlighted his lonely room, threatened to slither out of his heart and burst from his chest, he bit his tongue and curled his toes, willing the rumbles of darkness to roll past and dissolve into its awaited home.

Keep reading

anonymous asked:

The preview into your mind that you allow your audience to see has me intrigued. I'm sorry for any girl who never let you love her. I know I don't know you, but from what I know from your work, you have one of the most beautiful souls I've ever witnessed.

this is honestly one of the sweetest things i’ve ever read. i really hope you or anyone else who listens to flatsound aren’t actively pushing blame onto girls you don’t even know personally, though. it’s okay to hate someone for lying, or for cheating, or for any kind of betrayal, but in the end you can’t ever hate someone for not wanting to be with you. i know its a depressing stigma, but the truth is some people just don’t want to invest in a relationship with someone who struggles with any sort of mental illness, and that’s fine.

with that aside, thank you so much for saying this to me. it really did light up my night.