Please don’t worry about me.
I’m just a little tired from being strong all the time…. Between dealing with all my own problems, pretending everything’s fine and helping other people with their problems – I sometimes feel like I have no energy left.
Sometimes I imagine what it would feel like to be taken care of… for someone to wrap me up in a blanket, hold me while I cry and tell me that they love me and that everything will be alright. But for some reason, whenever anyone asks me if I’m okay – I always say I’m fine!?
I think deep down I’m afraid…. Afraid that if I reach out for help, I might be let down… or afraid that if open up, all the pain I’ve been holding inside will come flooding out and I won’t be able to stop it.
I think that’s possibly the biggest paradox of having strength… that sometimes you spend so much of your energy being strong for yourself and others that it ultimately weakens you to the point where you feel you have nothing left to give… That’s how I’m feeling right now – but give me time and I know I’ll be okay.
I’ll push through like I always do… because I’m strong….
and I don’t know how to be any other way.
Castiel is demoted from distinguished guardian angel to… cupid. He is given his ‘Hail Mary’ assignment: to bond Dean Winchester and Lisa Braeden together as designated soulmates. But Castiel is posed a problem: Dean is adamantly against the idea of soulmates, and Lisa Braeden hates the ever-living shit out of him. Castiel is determined not to fail. Dean is determined to not let him succeed. And why does Castiel’s overused heart seem to beat faster whenever Dean is around him?
Question: who would like to be tagged in this when I post it? It will be on ao3 and tumblr, in a couple of installments. Please comment below or pop a message in my askbox.
ok so I can honestly just imagine pidge getting REALLY UPSET that shiro isn’t taking care of himself like
shiro gets sinus infections and shit pretTy often bc he’s got a huge lump of scar tissue hanging out in his nasal cavity, and the first time it happens with team voltron he tries to hide it until he FUCKING PASSES OUT LIKE A DINGUS
and he wakes up and everyone’s like FUCK SHIRO ARE YOU OK??? but pidge is just SC REA M ING “WHAT’S WRONG WITH YOU?! YOU COULD HAVE BEEN SERIOUSLY HURT SHIRO!!! WHAT THE FUCK YOU JUST FUCKING P ASSE D O UT WH–”
hunks like “woah pidge chill” but pidge is just: (ง °`Д´°)ง
pidge makes shiro PROMISE that if he starts to feel sick again he HAS to tell them–and they tear up a little bit–and shiro’s just like OH GOD I’M SO SORRY PLS DON’T CRY I’M SORRY
and pidge is just:
so a few months pass and shiro DOES get sick again and he’s like “…shit I gotta tell them but I don’t want them to worry ahhhhhhh fuck”
so he DOES tell pidge but really downplays ALL of his symptoms and pidge side eyes him SO FUCKING HARD like
(￢ ￢) “…ok. I trust you shiro. but you GOTTA tell me if it gets worse, ok? like if you develop a fever. ok?” and shiro’s like yeah sure no problem
(but he’s ALREADY got a fever, like a JACKASS)
and later that day pidge calls him down to their workspace all “shiro I want to test the levels of brain wave compatibility between paladins and their lions to better understand blah blah blah you’re most connected to your lion blah blah let me put these things on your head”
shiro’s sick and spaced out so he’s like “uh sure, that’s fine”
but PSYCH it’s a fucking THERMOMETER and the screen lights up “102.47″ and pidge just SCREECHES
“I KNEW IT! I KNEW YOU WERE MORE SICK THAN YOU SAID SHIRO GOD DAMN IT!!! WHY WON’T YOU JUST TELL US–”
and shiro’s stunned and apologizing, but also chuckling cuz it’s funny how upset pidge is getting about a little cold and saying, “pidge, really, it’s not that big of a deal, I just didn’t want you to worry over nothing.”
and pidge stops screaming really suddenly, almost crying, still obviously furious, just staring at shiro in silence. then just shouts “HOW ARE WE SUPPOSED TO TRUST YOU?!” and storms off
when ppl describe having bpd as “literal hell” and all the sudden ur spiraling into panic bc is my life actually hell?? if it’s not, do i Not have bpd??? am i making this all up???? what does “normal” even feel like??? is what i’m feeling “normal”???? is my functioning even at all impaired, or is my level of dysfunction “normal”??????? did things used to feel worse????? bc i can’t remember at all what i’ve felt before????????? who would i be without my bpd label???? who am i???? am i ok??????????
If you 100/10 would do it again, would you consider doing Kei's Viktor if Kei has any nerves left to do your Yuuri? :3
asdjflkjfd LET KEI L I V E–I mean kei doesn’t have to do that again, just looking at my style is like. wth okay but maybe after I finish kei’s bday gift first, probably?? I have no problem with staring at kei’s art tag for another 2 hours and drawing her vic hahah
Of wanting to be a mother. Of wanting to carry a child. To give birth. To dream of it. To wake up crying. To know you can never bring a child into this world. The pain of being a transgender woman.
Don’t ever fucking tell me I’m lucky i don’t have to deal with periods…
If you’re wondering why I’m not posting GIFs or anything tomorrow: I’m at the hospital to have some tests taken because of my back problems and I have to stay overnight there. I might log in later on Saturday if I have enough energy to see what’s going on here. But I’ll be back on Sunday for sure.
Don’t worry about me. I’ll be fine. Nothing too serious going on. :)
lmao show me where i called clary a saint. but actually good job, you just perfectly illustrated my entire problem, which is that this fandom is willing to completely excuse and even praise alec for the same behavior for which you guys have repeatedly condemned clary.
i.e., when clary was willing to do whatever it takes to save her mother, she was deemed reckless, whiny, and - my personal favorite - self centered (for daring to want to save her only family who had been kidnapped and possibly killed/tortured by our magical fascist villain. weird that she’d go out of her way to save her, right?) (and also i would argue that a lot of the reckless, impulsive behavior can be attributed to the fact she’s a fucking teenage girl who had her entire world ripped apart in the space of like, a day when her mother was kidnapped, she finds out her father is alive and a fascist, her best friend is kidnapped by vampires, you know. just all those little life changing events. nbd.) (oh and then she had to deal with this grown man constantly up in her face refusing to show her any sympathy or desire to help her find her missing family member)
yet alec is praised for doing whatever he can to get jace back. when he lashes out at magnus and lydia and isabelle, does fandom call him selfish, even though he’s not the only one affected by jace’s disappearance (isabelle lost her brother too, but i don’t see her yelling at all the people around her who are trying to help) ? when he’s very emotional over his missing parabatai, does anyone call him whiny? nope. and that’s probably as it should be. i’d say that aside from the shit he said to clary, his actions have been pretty damn understandable for someone who lost such an important friend and family member.
it’s the fact that fandom is entirely willing to understand those actions and empathize with his feelings while never extending the same courtesy to clary. that is the problem. people’s inability, or rather their unwillingness to empathize with female characters while praising (white) male characters is a problem that can be identified across pretty much all major fandoms. so hey, at least you’re not alone!
oh and one more thing - a female character doesn’t have to be a saint in order to be treated with minimum decency :))
(oh but i lied, there’s more) (all of this doesn’t change the fact that those events alec described in his little tirade? none of those are clary’s fault in any way shape or form) (but why blame the evil fascist who truly caused all this when you can take your feelings out on a teenage girl am i right ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ )
Ok, so this one time, this obnoxious woman came into work and managed to get served by our store manager. She was not happy when our SM told her we didn’t have the product left. She yelled at her and called her a liar.
“Do I look stupid to you? I know you have more stock out the back! Off you go, go look!”
My SM walked out the back and lent up against wall for 5 minutes. When I asked her what she was doing, she said,
“Just looking for something for a customer.”
So, the moral of that story is, if we tell you we’re sold out, 95% of the time, we are!