oil rigger

The Librarians - GO SEE THIS

First: Have you ever seen this movie?

This. This is a staple of my youth. It is HILARIOUS. It has a QUIRKY GOOFUS LEAD GUY. It’s an adventure/comedy about a dude picked to be responsible for a secret archive of magical junk under the New York Metropolitan Library and he has to go out and find MORE magical junk before some jerks find it first and use it to mess up the world and you should ALL GO WATCH IT. The parallels to actual myth and legend are often ridiculously off-kilter but the acting and humor totally make up for it. It has two sequels which aren’t quite as good but you can watch those two if you feel like it BUT DEFINITELY WATCH THE FIRST ONE

*ahem* Now, have you heard of this new show that just premiered on Sunday?

THEY MADE A TV SHOW

THEY MADE A TV SHOW OF ONE OF MY ALL-TIME FAVORITE COMEDY/ACTION MOVIES

AND YOU KNOW WHAT?

IT WAS ACTUALLY REALLY GOOD

Now, “good” might be defined differently by different people. The fight scenes are laughably - I do mean laughably - terrible, the storyline has corny moments, but they are DELIGHTFULLY corny moments, with characters who are LOVEABLY goofy, and honestly pretty darn good writing, and it TOTALLY MATCHES THE HUMOR AND WORLD OF THE MOVIE

First, you’ve got the classic main character from the movies, Flynn Carsen, the dude on the right:

That picture says a lot, really.

He’s a goofus who originally was a professional student with like a jillion PhDs, and Bob Newhart is his mentor. Bob Newhart runs the magical Library where Flynn works. Bob Newhart is known as Judson but I figured a few of you would be excited about Bob Newhart, so name dropping ahoy. Bob Newhart probably won’t be in the actual SHOW much, which makes me sad, but you’ll love him in the movie. Also it looks like Flynn won’t be a MAIN-main character in the show, it’s gonna focus mostly on the new kids, but he’s PRETTY DARN IMPORTANT and hilarious.

Now let’s introduce some of the new cast in the show, who are fantastic in their OWN equally special ways. Here’s three of them:

I feel like these pictures are really speaking for themselves. Notice how they are not all your “classic” super-hot characters (I say classic because I dunno about you but I find the nice-guy midwestern oil rigger dude in the middle quite attractive OH AND DID YOU KNOW HE HAS AN IQ OF 190 AND SECRETLY WRITES ART HISTORY BOOKS AS A HOBBY AND YET STILL HAPPILY KEEPS HIS DAY JOB ON A FAMILY OIL RIG IN OKLAHOMA AND HE’S EXPERIENCED IN BARFIGHTING AND HE’S A REALLY NICE GUY WITH A NERDY SIDE FOR ART)

(CAN YOU TELL WHO MY FAVORITE NEW CHARACTER IS YET)

But yes, I’m really pleased that they managed to collect such a relatively NORMAL-looking group of people. No one is dirt-ugly and it would be quite easy to say all of them are very attractive in their own way, but it doesn’t look or feel like a bunch of supermodels just walked on-set and were handed scripts and awkwardly-fitting outfits. I am looking at you, Revolution.

(Ugh, the guy in the super-tight blue shirt, and her in the too-small leather jacket, and the bad fight scenes, and, I just, I can’t–)

So back to our first (fourth?) picture, the dude on the left is a super-smart kleptomaniac, not in the psychological disorder sense (well, maybe) but in the “I’m smart enough to steal things so I think I will ‘cause it’s fun” sense. He’s decently entertaining, I expect good things from him.

On the right we have the ONLY non-genius member of the group, which isn’t actually saying much because she’s pretty darn smart and she kicks butt (literally, even if the fight scenes really aren’t much to speak of XD;). I think she’s a colonel in an anti-terrorism unit or something. There was a nuclear bomb in the beginning of the episode. Also an opal that summons demons but that actually wasn’t that important (thank goodness, I really don’t care for demons in real life or in my TV shows). 

And on the right in THIS picture is our other new main character, who is a super-sweet girl with a totally real and very rare brain condition called synesthesia, so she sort of overloads on super smart information and gets weird side effects, like math smelling like peanuts. It’s hard to explain, but they have a really cool (and sad) explanation for it. 

So the new cast all-together looks something like this:

That’s pretty much the whole show right there. 

(Oh yeah, and there’s this guy, but we don’t don’t know much about him yet except he’s a grouch who wishes all these kids would leave him alone:)

Did you notice? This is a show about gathering magical artifacts, and almost everyone in it is a NERD of some kind, and NONE OF THEM HAVE MAGICAL POWERS. There are no convenient psychics or people who get vibes (I’m sorry, Warehouse 13, I’m calling you on that), there are just ordinary people with maybe not so ordinary but still very possible gifts, and they are all lovable dorks and OH MY GOODNESS WATCH THIS SHOW

WATCH IT

BUT WATCH THE ORIGINAL MOVIE FIRST SO YOU CAN FULLY APPRECIATE HOW GREAT AN ADAPTATION IT IS

IT’S FUN AND HUMOROUS AND YOU’LL ENJOY IT AND BY GOODNESS THEY HAD BETTER NOT MESS IT UP WITH UNNECESSARY MATURE CONTENT OR TOO-DARK CREEPY STUFF OR WHAT HAVE YOU OTHERWISE I WILL BE VERY MAD ESPECIALLY AFTER WRITING IT THIS NICE REVIEW

That is my message. Thank you for your time.

Oh and before I go I should also warn you, this premier will make you cry over a sword.

You have been warned.

The Prince

After he killed himself,
his wife and son threw out
his things, and from the heap
I plucked your translation
of The Prince.

How odd
to see your smiling face
on the back of a book owned
by a barely literate dead man.

I hadn’t thought of you in years.

Until this crazy man nearly
runs my cousin down in a fit
of unmedicated pique, and we had
to, we had to press charges.

And he killed himself a few months after.

I knew the dead guy pretty well.

He drank Bud in his better years,
and barbequed, and laughed.

I remember him crying with his son
after the boy fell out of the
magnolia tree and broke his arm.

I was barely a teenager, and the kid
was only about four or five.

I might not have thought about him
again, nor you, my once-upon-a-time
professor, if I hadn’t found that book.

And now I wonder on a man who worked rigs
and read Machiavelli and drank Bud
and cried over his broken child and died.

And I wonder about you, Dr. Sex. Dr. God.
Everything that the kids called you.
I wonder on what you would think of this man,
this self-annihilator with the long-suffering wife
and the boy with tragedy for eyes, this oil-rigger
whose only book was your translation
of The Prince.


– S. E. De Haven (Snuffyart)