1. sometimes the only thing in your way is you (move).
2. you should know this by now: people will always surprise you. you are never the only one - ever. there is someone who feels the same as you (about anything, about everything), someone who will be there when you call at 2 am. people will surprise you - let them.
3. sad truth: you will blink and the moment will be gone. so you can choose: document or be in (or both, but you’ve never been great at multitasking). either way, don’t forget to live.
4. there is always hope.
5. some days are harder than others; some weeks, some months. that’s just the way it is. but you will have family, and friends, and God, and kind strangers, and good books, and sunrises, and thunderstorms - it will be hard, but you will be okay.
6. okay is enough. it will sometimes feel like you need to be doing more than okay, better than okay. but sometimes just okay is enough (sometimes it has to be).
7. leave nice, selfless, comments on people’s social media posts; strangers and friends alike. it will make your heart warm and light, and i guarantee, no matter who they are, it will make their day.
8. simple math: if you give everything and receive nothing you will be empty. so darling, use your words wisely. some people deserve paragraphs; essays, handwritten letters, poems in which the title bears only their name. but others, the ones who take and do not give, the ones that use and use and use, they barely deserve a sentence - do not waste your ink on them.
9. your daydreams are never reality. (there will be days when they come very close)
10. change is inevitable. find a way to deal with it (dance in the dark, dance in broad daylight, cry until you have emptied your soul. scream your curses against the universe, sing about the lonely that is eating you from the inside out - SING. make mixtapes full of songs that still mean something, write letters you actually send, close your eyes and pretend), do whatever you have to do. deal with it (safely. please be kind to yourself and stay safe).
11. drink water. oh man, drink so much water.
12. don’t be so afraid to love. the mixtape you gave your friends gave you, in return, text messages that said “i cried, thank you,” requests for music recommendations, and more text messages that said the things you have been waiting years to hear. don’t be scared to love, because the people you love? they love you too.
13. not everything is meant to be poetry.
14. talk to people. don’t let regret pile up only to find out it was all a misunderstanding.
15. you have a voice, a beautiful voice. you have things to say, and you have the means to say them. fear is overrated; you have a voice - use it.
16. you are alive. you are full of LOVE; you have in you the beauty that makes up sunrises, and sunsets, and mid-day shadows, and autumn leaves, and fields of wildflowers, and blurry pictures. you are alive, dear, you are proof that empty can be full, that hopeless can be turned hopeful. all the light that a full moon exists to reflect is carried within you; you hold a world of possibilities. breathe in and let the air shock your lungs; don’t ever forget, don’t ever forget - you are alive, and you are enough.
this post is going to be like half an outline for a fic i want to write and half a hope it’ll inspire someone else to write it instead but ive been thinking about how dirk must have learned more basic life skills. he can cook (or ‘cook’), has a place of his own, and presumably do laundry, among many other things.
while it’s entirely possible the CIA taught him some of them that seems a) unlikely for the age he’s implied to have been when he left and b) unlikely in general because lbr, the CIA sucks. so i suggest that just as the universe puts food in bart’s path when she needs to eat, it put people in dirk’s path to teach him how to survive.
imagine him ending up in the yard of a lonely old woman who takes an immediate liking to the strange, skinny, scared, english boy in her garden. after practically dragging him inside and forcing him to eat, she starts complaining about how the young these days never have enough time for their elders and she’s been waiting all week for her grandkids to come over and help her with housework. dirk realizes this must be why he’s here and eagerly offers to assist. he knows next to nothing but that’s alright because he can follow directions and at the end of it he can change a lightbulb and clean dishes like a pro.
the next mission (as he has taken to calling them) isnt so easy. a troubled high school senior has vanished from her foster home in the middle of the night. the missing girl’s older sister doesnt understand who dirk is and why he cares, but she’s just glad someone does, the police have’n already written her baby sis off as a lost cause runaway. she let’s him crash on her couch for a week and feeds him what she can spare; in return by the end of the week he finds the girl and get’s her back relatively unharmed. turns out the girl’s (much older) boyfriend had kidnapped her and dirk experiences someone pulling a knife on him for the first time. but hey, he learned how to kinda cook and rent an apartment.
the early days are the easiest even tho he has no clue what’s going on (even more so than later). the people he meets are more kind and receptive than they’ll ever be again and getting involved in cases aren’t such a struggle. a few years down the line while he’s happily cooking in his kitchen, alone but free, he recognizes what the universe did for him to get to this point.
if he didn’t feel like such a pawn he’d almost be grateful.