oh the lameness

2

I would have come for you. And if I couldn’t walk, I’d crawl to you, and no matter how broken we were, we’d fight our way out together-knives drawn, pistols blazing. Because that’s what we do. We never stop fighting.

I will rearrange the stars
Pull ‘em down to where you are
I promise, I’ll do better
With every heartbeat I have left
I’ll defend your every breath
I promise I’ll do better
I will soften every edge
Hold the world to its best
I promise I’ll do better
With every heartbeat I have left
I’ll defend your every breath
(I’ll do better)

steal the toaster

in which i try and fail to be as good as @jiilys and @alrightpotter

James Potter to whoever stole my weetabix is dead: WE ARE OUT OF MILK

James Potter: I MADE TEA AND WENT TO THE FRIDGE AND IT WAS GONE

James Potter: IM LITERALLY CRYIGN THIS IS A DISASTER

Sirius Black: chill

Sirius Black: might have been me this morning though

Peter Pettigrew: did u hv it with weetabix by any chance???

Sirius Black: …..

Sirius Black: shit


Sirius Black to Remus Lupin: do you reckon he’ll accept cornflakes?

Remus Lupin: kellogs ones?

Sirius Black: wtf no lidl ones

Sirus Black: do I look like im made of money

Remus Lupin: well yes

Sirius Black: rude


Sirius changed the name to: next doors wifi is dragon420

Remus Lupin: how did you…?

Remus Lupin: acc I don’t want to know

James Potter: omg bc they BLAZE IT

Sirius Black: omg

Peter Pettigrew: omg


Peter Pettigrew to James Potter: where r u we’re going pub

James Potter: in the library

James Potter: there’s this chem girl

James Potter: she’s so pretty

James Potter: pete?

James Potter: ???


Sirius Black to LADSLADSLADS: new business idea

Sirius Black: james sells jams in his pyjamas

Sirius Black: we can call it

Sirius Black: jim jams

Remus Lupin has left the group


James Potter to three normal ppl + fucking romeo: she came and asked to borrow my pen today !!!

James Potter: out of the whole library!!! she picked me !!!

James Potter: what does this mean???

Sirius Black removed James Potter from the group

Peter Pettigrew: oh thank god


Remus Lupin to James Potter: why have you called me fourteen times???

James Potter: oh pete fell out the window but hes fine

Remus Lupin: whAT???

Remus Lupin: I WAS GONE TWENTY MINUTES

James Potter: on a completely unrelated matter would you say forgetting your name was a sign of concussion?


Lily Evans to James Potter: congrats on winning the match, you were really good


James Potter to no Sirius we’re not going skinny dipping its 4 degrees: HELP

James Potter sent a photo

James Potter: WHAT DO I SAY????

Sirius Black: be ~cool~

Peter Pettigrew: ignore her, girls love it when you ignore them

Sirius Black: mate…. maybe this is why youre a virgin

Peter Pettigrew: for the last time im NOT A VIRGIN

Sirius Black: idk sounds like smth a virgin would say


Peter Pettigrew to James Potter: if my mum rings the flat say im not there

James Potter: but youre not here…?

Peter Pettigrew: she believs u when u say it


Remus Lupin to pineapple is never acceptable on pizza fight me sirius: new drinking game- take a shot whenever james mentions lily’s eyes

Sirius Black: do you want us to die????

James Potter: but guys

James Potter: theyre so green

James Potter: its like a forest

Peter Pettigrew: ill buy some vodka omw back


James Potter changed the group name to: MAN U 4-CHELSEA 1

Sirius Black: blocked


Sirius Black to sirius and co: dont go near the microwave btw

Peter Pettigrew: …….why????

Sirius Black: its lowkey broken

Sirius Black: and by lowkey i mean will kill a man

Remus Lupin: I swear to god if we call the fire service again we’re getting fined

Sirius Black: its fine im gonna steal benjys


Remus Lupin to Benjy Fenwick: Just a quick heads up, maybe hide your microwave

Benjy Fenwick: I already did after black stole my toaster

Remus Lupin: ah sorry about that


Remus Lupin to Sirius Black: you told me benjy didn’t want his toaster anymore

Sirius Black: idk how youre studying astrophysics if you believed tht tbh


Sirius Black to moony ripped a new fiver im so proud: saw evans today

James Potter: omg did she mention me?

Sirius Black: she wanted to know if we were fucking

James Potter: what did you say???

Sirius Black: yes obvisly

James Potter: aw babe

Remus Lupin: get a room


James added Sirius Black and Lily Evans to the group: just to clarify me and sirius are not fucking

Sirius Black: exCUSE ME???

Sirius Black: DID U JST DUMP ME BY GROUP NAME????

Sirius Black: HOW WILL I EVER GET OVER THIS BETRAYAL

Lily Evans: james how could you?

James Potter: …. are you serious

Sirius Black: …..

James Potter: don’t you fucking dare


Sirius Black to James Potter: come and help me buy 150 snickers for bellatrix

James Potter: nah im in history

James Potter: isn’t she allergic to nuts

Sirius Black: exactly


Remus Lupin to Sirius Black: lily just asked if she can sit w/ us at james’s final

Sirius Black: oh mY GOD

Sirius Black: operation lames is go

Remus Lupin: I told you not to call it that

Sirius Black: it’s a gd name #hatersgonnahate

Remus Lupin: please stop


Peter Pettigrew to potter for president: afterparty at ours right?

Sirius Black: hell yes

Sirius Black: proud of you jamesy


Sirius Black changed to the group name to: WHY THE FRICKETY FRACK IS EVANS IN THE KITCHEN IN JAMES’S FOOTBALL SHIRT?????

James Potter: she cant walk around naked can she?