oh right because it is perfect

  • 707: Now it’s Jumin's turn to “show and tell” his favorite object!
  • Jumin: This is my rock. I like that rock because Zen gave it to me.
  • Zen: I THREW IT AT YOU !
  • Jumin: Zen can be nice too.
Today, I fucked up... by trying to ride a bike.

So I’m up North with a family friend, my gran, and my cousin. This cute little town happened to be perfect for bike riding, and there were in fact two bikes. My cousin takes the normal bike and leaves me with an olympic-looking one. Now normally this tall bike would be no problem for anyone to ride, but no. I am only 4'11.

I get on the bike anyway, thinking, “Oh my god this is actually going to be easy, my legs are just long enough!”

nope.

I start pedaling, getting like 2 and a half pedals in and stopping because my back already hurts from leaning forward. Right then I realized that I have absolutely no idea how to break this bike. Rolling down the hill I thought again, “This is gonna be easy, just hop off and run!“ 

nope.

I just lean left because my leg wasn’t even long enough to get over the bike. I fall, the 30-40 lb bike lands on my body which is only a little over half the weight of the bike. My entire thigh gets bruised and my leg gets cut right on the inside of the knee.

no cross country for me tomorrow.

TLDR; too short for a bike, couldn’t brake, got badly bruised and cut.

Dear Mass Effect fandom,
Remember all those discussions we had about your hatred of MShep and what it meant to people playing him? We told you different people play MShep: men, women, trans, non-binary, others…
We told you they all have different reasons to play him and identify with him, reasons that are important to them and that we wanted you to respect.
Well. Can we NOT start all over again with broRyder? Can we not call him a loser already? Can you let people who want to play broRyder play him without asking them to write a 30 page essay to justify why? 

Because I see you making broRyder the butt of all jokes, portraying him as pathetic, while sisRyder is perfection. I see that and it’s your right to post those things. I’m not here saying “oh poor broRyder” because that’s not the point. The point is that I have a feeling you all won’t stop at a few posts and you’ll be shitting all over him for months before we even get Andromeda. 
Sure, you find it funny and mostly harmless but consider the feelings of ACTUAL PEOPLE with various IDENTITIES who just want to have a good time with the character they identify with the most. Like I said: there are men, woman, trans, non-binary, and others. People who might see broRyder as their new source of identification (there is NOTHING wrong with that, I should say) and who feel annoyed and sad that the anti-campaign is starting all over again. 
I swear, you can respect those people regardless of your feelings about male protags and Bioware’s marketing. That would be a nice change in this fandom. 

Thanks for reading,
Deb

soft apologies│a.i

for mine and @calumsbicth‘s valentine blurb night

credit to the original owner of the gif

Requested: yes

Pairing: Ashton x Reader

Warning: smut (oh shit), swearing.

Description: When Ashton forgets about Valentine’s Date he has with Y/N, thoughts and emotions immediately start running through her mind. 

The clinging sound of your heels filled the kitchen as you prepared the last things for the night. Candles, home-made meal, flowers, everything was perfect. You always hated Valentine’s because you never had anyone to celebrate it with. Your last couple of relationships would always end right before the 14th, so it was not even weird that you were looking that much forward to the night. It all seemed like a movie. You had bought new lingerie, made him food like you were some kind of mum - even though you had to call Calum to get him to help you. Nothing could go wrong.

Keep reading

alright but now its time to talk about Baby Gay™ otherwise known as alex danvers

  • alex who sits up all night tossing and turning thinking back through her childhood memories tries to decide if there were any clues. should she have known.
  • thinks about her friends, the few and far in between because she had to be perfect, perfect for kara for her mom, for everyone, there wasn’t time to have a lot of friends. but maybe she did have a few and they were close, and wow what if she had felt something then and just couldnt make sense of it
  • alex who thinks back to dates and how after maybe after sex maybe not something didnt feel right ; you’re supposed to feel something right??? when they smile at you, there’s butterflies or fireworks or some bullshit!!! where is hers???
  • but oh my god maggie sawyer smiles at her and alex feels like her entire body is lighter? kara brings light into her life but maggie sawyer brings everything else with her too, alex sees maggie smile and suddenly crappy romcoms on a thursday night when kara is feeling sad and down, and those squishy scenes they make sense and its disgusting but with her it makes sense and that’s terrifying
  • alex who thinks maybe its time to explore though bc if maggies helping her discover herself clearly shes not into her or she would have said so right?? and maggie just got over her gf and maggies not into her and this is a mess
  • so alex who nervously goes to a gay bar!!! by herself!! embarassed almost and wants to leave which is weird because we’re talking about party girl alex danvers who drank too much and danced too hard not all that long ago but alex who finds a pretty girl that flirts with her 
  • and the pretty girl asks her home and she wants to but god maybe shes not ready yet this is a lot and a pretty redhead flirts with her and shes a little overwhelmed and she also cant stop comparing parts of her to maggie and she knows thats not oaky
  • alex running into maggie on her way out??? maggie showing tiny bits of jealousy but also concern because alex looks flustered and nervous and so happy though and god is she okay?? and alex who is good and fine but maggies here and she asks why and she just answers ‘havent you heard the best way to get over someone is under someone else’ and alex flusters so hard bc she knows god she knows and she was close to the same but hearing maggie say it kind of hurts even if its not about her and she has to make up some excuse to leave
  • and GOD I COULD GO ON GAY ALEX DANVERS AN ACTUAL LESBIAN WHO DOESNT KNOW WHAT TO DO BC ITS ALL SO NEW AND ITS SO PURE
Fine Amnesty

Check, Please! 14 Days of Love, Day 1: FOOIINNE  (Read on AO3)

@softkent


“Oh my, Jack, you should have seen it,” Bitty said. “I swear they were counting down to the very second.” He held his phone against his ear with his shoulder and took the pie crust from the fridge where it had been chilling. “As soon as it hit midnight, Chowder and Caitlin were all over each other, kissing like nobody’s business. I haven’t seen such a display since, goodness, last Winter Screw. Only with less alcohol involved.”

Bitty laughed. “Yes, Lardo had the score cards all ready to go. Perfect 10s from everyone but Holster, but I think that was because,” Bitty stopped, looked around, then whispered, “Ransom and March were cuddling and being cute on the couch right next to him.

“Hmm, what else? Oh! Nursey and Dex were holding hands all day. Dex’s face was all pink and he was glaring something fierce, but that boy would not let go of Nursey’s hand for love nor money. Nursey was just as pleased as punch. He forgot all about being ‘chill’ for almost a whole hour.”

Holster walked into the kitchen carrying a cellophane-wrapped basket. “Special delivery,” he sang. “From your sugar daddy, Bitty.”

“You hush, Holster. Sweetheart, you didn’t have to send me anything. You know I’m coming up this weekend.” Bitty unwrapped the basket and began to take out the contents. “Apples… is this a fruit basket? Butter, flour… Jack Zimmerman, did you send me a pie baking basket?”

Holster groaned. “Here we go.”

Bitty looked Holster dead in the eye and said into his phone, “Jack honey, you are the sweetest, most thoughtful, loveliest boyfriend I could hope for. I wish you were here with me right now so I could give you a big ol’ kiss. Thank you so much.”

Holster shook his head and turned to leave.

Bitty raised his voice. “And I wish your butt was here, too, so I could give it a big ol’ squeeze.”

“Enjoy this while you can,” Holster said from the hallway. “The Valentine’s Day fine amnesty ends in a few hours, and tomorrow it’s double fines for all PDA and pet names so we can snap up all that sweet discount chocolate. Tell Jack to send his wallet; we both know you won’t be able to knock it off with the pet names and I need to stock up on Reese’s peanut butter hearts.”

“Oh, ha ha. We aren’t that bad,” Bitty called after him. “And you hush too, Mr. Zimmermann.” He sighed. “I really do wish you were here. I sure am looking forward to seeing you this weekend.

“Well, you know if it was up to me, we’d talk for hours, but if you have to go… Anyway, I was in the middle of baking a pie before I got all distracted, so I’ll let you go. See you soon, honey. Love you, good bye.”

Bitty hung up his phone and got back to work on his pie. He was just pulling it out of the oven when there a knock on the front door. Someone answered it and there was a round of enthusiastic greetings – obviously somebody they knew. He didn’t think anything more of it until someone stepped through the kitchen door.

“Hey, Bits.”

Bitty spun around. “Jack? What on earth?”

Jack walked over to him and took him in his arms. “It’s Valentine’s Day. I wanted to see you.”

Bitty pulled him down into a deep kiss. “I’m so happy to see you sweetheart, but you didn’t have to come all this way. I mean, with your schedule… And you sent me that adorable basket…”

“I didn’t want to miss fine amnesty,” Jack said and Bitty had to kiss him again.

Imagine Bernie lingerie shopping for Serena and getting super awkward about it. Because Bernie has only ever really had practical M&S or Tesco or army issue underwear, but she knows Serena loves shopping in the specialist lingerie shops and wants to make sure she gets her a perfect set. But she can’t help but feel that maybe she’s being too gay??? What if the assistant thinks she’s staring at the mannequin and not the bra?? Flustered Bernie amongst the lace underwear regretting every life choice she has ever made. And then she finds a perfect leopard print set and she knows Serena will look smoking hot in it and her mind wanders and suddenly she realises she’s fondling a piece of material and hastily looks to see nobody noticed. Then finally when she gets to the till, the assistant asks if she’s got the right size Bernie panics because oh my goodness the underwear is clearly not her size but how does she explain she’s buying it as a gift without seeming weird and when she finally gets home and Serena eventually models the set Bernie basically weeps in relief because she was so traumatised by the whole lingerie shopping experience. idk I just have a lot of thoughts about awkward practical am-I-being-too-gay Bernie underwear shopping and overthinking everything when literally nobody else in the shop is paying her any bit of attention.

youtube

Leslie talks about learning from Kate’s comedic timing in a previous interview, and I think this clip is one example where she slays because her timing is just perfect:


That beat right before she says no.


The ways she draws out the silence just enough before she chokes out her reply:

Her delivery and performance is flawless, but she’s not exactly telling jokes - the humour is in the pauses, the spaces in-between

Shipping
  • M/F: Oh they're so cute! They match so well! They'd make a perfect couple! Meant for each other! Yadayadayada...
  • M/M: No that's just wrong! You can't ship real life people because that's not right. It's not your choice for who they like. Stop shipping them!
  • Me:
  • Me:
  • Me:
  • Me: Bitch?
  • Honestly, I'm so tired of this stupid "stop shipping" BS. I mean, I'm more of like the, " STOP FORCING YOUR SHIP DOWN THEIR THROATS", campaign. But the anti-shippers.. You don't like ships? Okay.. Sorry bae. You think it's wrong? Okay.. Sorry bae. But then, I've noticed that when hetero ships come into the picture, people who don't approve of shipping all of a sudden approve of that ship? Why?
  • I ship my ship. I'm a shipper. But I would never, ever force my ship for reality. I will respect whatever relationship that they will have.
  • I also respect /your/ opinion of ships. So it's about time your ass did the same of my shipping ass.
  • Anyways, time to address those shippers who take shit too damn far.
  • Calm the hell down child. You seriously take this shipping business way too damn far. To the point where you push it and force it and it gives the rest of us bad reputations. Not to mention our fandom as well. You ship them so badly that you become delusional. And you're going to deny this fact. I know you are because, like i said, delusional. But, snap out of it. You can ship them. Yes, but please respect their wishes. Don't bring down a member for your petty wants. Doing this makes you selfish and inconsiderate because you're doing all this with not even half ofa mind and you're NOT thinking about the consequences or the feelings of the poor guy. So stop the ship wars. Let other people ship whoever the hell they wanna ship. Keep your fucked up opinions to yourself. Bottle up all that negative shit and launch it into space because humanity is already as fucked up as it can possibly be without the added negativity. Thanks.

OKAY SHADOWHUNTERS 2X04 WAS AMAZING!

  • MAGNUS, MY BABY ANGEL CHILD. 
  • RAPHAEL HAD FOUR SCENES! FOUR! OMG!
  • MAGNUS AND RAPHAEL!
  • MAGNUS HEALING HIS SON AND CHOOSING BROES BEFORE HOES!
  • MAGNUS BACK STORY!
  • MAGNUS AND RAPHAEL BACK STORY!
  • ALDERTREE TORTURED THE BAE HE IS DEAD TO ME!
  • ANYONE WHO HURTS THE BAE IS DEAD TO ME
  • (Simon gets a pass because one day they’ll be in love)
  • PAPA MAGNUS IS CANON AND HE SAID RELAX BOYS AND MY DEAR BOY AND CALLED MY BABY SON, AND UGHHHHHHHHH.
  • MAGNUS SENT CAMILLE AWAY LIKE A BAMF!
  • CAMILLE DON’T SCREW WITH EITHER OF MY BOYS, GO BACK TO HELL WHERE YOU BELONG!
  • RAPHAEL WON’T GET BURNED BECAUSE MAGNUS SAVED HIM.
  • SIMON SAYING SCARFACE, OH HONEY.
  • SAPHAEL IS ANGSTY AS HELL RIGHT NOW, BUT IT WILL BE OKAY I KNOW IT.
  • ALL THREE OF MY BOYS WORKING TOGETHER!
  • CUTE MALEC SCENE AKA THE ONLY FLUFFY PART OF THIS EPISODE.
  • LUCELYN SMOOCHIES!
  • BUT ALSO WTF WHY DID THEY KILL HER (she’s not perfect but that is such a departure from previous canon)
  • (this gives me more hope that they won’t kill my baby though)
  • MY LUCELYN HEART IS BROKEN, RIP THIRD FAVORITE SHIP.
  • LIGHTWOOD SIBLING SCENES WERE A+
  • ALEC WAS AWESOME (despite the demon problem yikes)
  • And I don’t really care about clary and jace ship drama or jace drama that much, but that being said I care a little bit more about it then i did in the books.
  • Good job shadowhunters writers for making me care about this series and these characters again, BUT ALSO WHY IN THE HELL ARE YOU BEING SO RUDE BUT ALSO THANK YOU FOR MY BABIES OKAY?

Discussion time :) 

In all the bookish photos we see, whether it’s here on Tumblr or on other platforms, all the books are in pristine condition. Sure, it’s lovely to see them like that :) But what about the books that have had accidents happen to them? That show signs of wear and tear, signs of being read over and over again, of being borrowed and loved by many people?

I see a lot of people getting so worked up over how others treat their books. “Oh my god, you dog ear your pages? You dropped your books or spilled something on them?? You cracked their spines??? You monster!” But the truth is that nobody has any right to judge anyone else over how they take care of their books. It makes me so sad that the book community sometimes clings to this shallowness and makes others believe that only people who have perfect looking books are true bookworms. Because it couldn’t be further from the truth. You are allowed to treat your books however way you want. Read and live the way you choose, not how other people tell you to :)

*featuring my copy of The Sky Is Everywhere, which has a corner that was chewed by my puppy
* mug by the amazing @bookwormboutique (a gift from Luana @introvertedbookworm24, who is literally an angel, thank you so much <3 )

lequeenofrandomness  asked:

Hello! I just got into the whole "Imagine MM" thing, so I was wondering if I can ask a for a request? RFA + Unknown playing DDR with MC (with MC being a total boss at it)?

welcome to hell the mysme world. lmao. also i’ve never played ddr before :o

Yoosung

  • he’s struggling trying his best to follow the oncoming arrows to the dance
  • but they were coming on the screen to fast for his mind to process AND step on the right ones at the right time
  • constant “boos” and “miss” were popping up each time to remind him how terrible he was at this game
  • how does anyone have the coordination to play this game???
  • and then he glaces over at you and hE’S SHOOK
  • you literally have perfects coming up after every arrow
  • w h a t
  • after the song ends, yoosung’s out of breath and leaning over the railing
  • “MC… how… are you so good at this game…”
  • yoosung
  • this was the easiest level
  • you tilt your head to the side
  • “Oh… maybe it’s because I played it religiously when I was younger. But you haven’t even seen me play this on the highest difficulty yet.”
  • yoosung didn’t even want to think about it
  • “It’s… okay. I think I’ll just stick to LOLOL…”

Zen

  • definitely not terrible like yoosung, but not perfect like you
  • since he’s an active and fit guy, he has no trouble with the swift movements and coordination
  • acting has its benefits
  • after a few rounds, he’s finally got the hang of it and manages to get through a few songs without a shit score
  • on your guys’ third song, he peeks over to see how you’re doing and yet again, you haven’t missed one arrow up to this point
  • zen’s eyes then travel to your face – it’s filled with determination 
  • even if it was a game, he admires your passion to win
  • he realizes that he’s been gawking at you for too long and has missed a few steps in between
  • “Distracted, are we?” you tease while still focused on dancing
  • “N-No!”
  • the round ended and your score was at least 50 points over his
  • you give him a victory sign and your best smile
  • “I think someone was a little too distracted~”
  • “Only because you look so cute when you’re determined~”
  • “Okay, let’s play another round to see if you get distracted again.”
  • “As you wish, Princess.”

Jaehee

  • this is a childish game this is a childish game this is a cHILDISH GAME
  • too late bc you dragged her up with you to play
  • she should be working on paperwork that jumin gave to her, but you suggested that she take a break from it 
  • and that you’ll take the heat for her
  • honestly how did she let you talk her into this???
  • “Do you know how to play?”
  • “You… just step on the arrows that are on the screen, correct?”
  • “Yep! I’ll set the level on easy, but you can choose the song.”
  • she sighs and while scrolling through the list, she picks out the song she’s most familiar with
  • and then the round starts
  • she’s following the screen while trying to coordinate with the steps 
  • and tbh she wasn’t doing too bad?
  • sure, she wasn’t as skilled as you were in playing this
  • but jaehee was pretty proud of herself for being able to do something right
  • a few “goods” and “excellents” popped up, with one or two “perfects” as well
  • the round finally ends, and she sees that you had a higher score, but that was to be expected
  • “Wow, you did good, Jaehee!”
  • she gives you a small smile
  • “Not good as you, of course, but thankfully, I was able to alleviate some of my stress by playing this game with you. So, thank you for that.”

Jumin

  • DO I EVEN HAVE TO SPELL THI S OUT LMFAOOOoOOo
  • first off – he does not understand
  • is this what commoners play for fun?????
  • strange
  • he’s literally so over-calculating and you have to physically drag him by the arm to the other side of the dance area
  • jumin just SHUT UP AND PLAY THE DAMN GAME
  • before starting a match against each other, you start a 1-player game to show him how the game works, stepping on the corresponding arrows that show up on the screen
  • gray eyes watch as you sway your body to the beat of the song and he’s immediately enticed
  • “Jumin, are you watching how this works or are you watching my body?”
  • “Both.”
  • once the song finished, you pick a song and set the level on the easiest 
  • the arrows start moving and you begin stepping on the correct ones, always getting perfects
  • when the song is about halfway over, you decide to sneak a peak of how your boyfriend is doing and—
  • HE’S NOT EVEN DANCING RHYTHMICALLY TO THE SONG HE’S LITERALLY JUST STEPPING ON THE ARROWS THAT POP UP
  • it felt as if you were competing with a robot
  • you can’t hold back as you double-over in pain from laughing so hard
  • you ended up missing the last few arrows at the end of the song, but that didn’t matter because the way jumin was playing was way more entertaining
  • after getting back on your feet, you wipe a few tears from your eyes and look up at him, extremely amused
  • “So what did you think about the game?”
  • folding his arms over his chest, he sighs
  • “It’s a strange concept, but I don’t dislike it, especially if it was with you.”

707

  • “Ohh, you want to challenge God 707 to Dance Dance Revolution? I accept your challenge~”
  • you and seven got on the dance platform
  • he allowed to you choose the song and difficulty
  • annnnd start!
  • the song began and the arrows moved the the center of the screen, indicating which one to step on
  • taking a deep breath, you doubled your concentration, obtaining perfects every time
  • however, seven was obtaining perfects just like you
  • excuse me boi whO GAVE YOU PERMISSION
  • you were not about to let your boyfriend win over something that you’ve been playing since you were a kid
  • dancing intensifies
  • the song ends and you’re nearly out of breath but with a perfect score
  • you look over at seven and
  • he has a perfect score as well
  • call it luck or being on par with you, but damn
  • “Looks~ like~ we~ tied~!”
  • a mischievous grin creeps onto your face
  • “Winner of the next round gets to eat from the Honey Buddha Chip stash.”
  • “Deal.”

Saeran

  • “No.”
  • “Please?”
  • your boyfriend was being as stubborn as usual
  • you huff, not giving up on this chance to see him dance 
  • if you could call it that
  • “If I get a perfect score, you have to play with me.”
  • “Hn. Good luck at that.”
  • you step on the platform and choose the song and put in the hardest difficulty just to prove that you weren’t messing around
  • little does saeran know that you are a complete beast at this game and have been playing it ever since you were young
  • the music begins and the arrows come
  • annnnd
  • BAM
  • you were nailing every single move with such precision
  • h ow??
  • additionally, the music was relatively quick and upbeat, so brownie points on top of that
  • saeran could only watch in amazement
  • by the time the you finished, his eyes glance at your score
  • perfect score
  • oh no
  • what was the point in playing with you now since you were going to win every time
  • “I think I win~”
  • he turns his head away in embarrassment, a small blush on his cheeks
  • he has nothing to say because he knows hE LOST BIG TIME
  • “Fine. One round.”
  • that was a good enough answer for you
  • you guys actually spent more than one round playing together
Popcorn

Requested By Anon

Pairings: Bucky x Reader


Bucky has created a chatroom.

Bucky has invited Sam.

Bucky: I need your help!

Sam: Is Y/N okay? Were you two attacked? Was it Hydra? I’ll get Steve!

Bucky: No! Y/N’s fine. We’re fine. Kind of. I’m not fine.

Sam: … Bucky Barnes. Are you nervous about your first date with Y/N?

Bucky: YES EVERYTHING HAS TO BE PERFECT. WHAT DO I DO?!

Sam: First of all, calm down before I fly over there and steal your date.

Sam: What are you two doing?

Bucky: We’re watching a movie. Gods, Y/N looks so beautiful! Even while stuffing their face with popcorn.

Tony has joined the chat.

Tony: This is my area of expertise. Why didn’t you come to me?

Sam: Sit your metal ass down. He came to me because I’m clearly the best one for this.

Tony: Who’s deemed a playboy here? Oh right, me!

Sam: And who’s single here? Oh right, you!

Tony: Um

Sam: Wait

Sam: Shit

Sam: I am too

Bucky: Oh my god Y/N’s laughing at the movie and

Bucky: I’m sweating guys

Bucky: Who looks this cute

Bucky: WHO

Bucky: EVEN Y/N’S LAUGH IS LIKE MUSIC TO MY EARS

Bucky: I THINK I’M HAVING HEART PALPITATIONS

Bucky: WHAT IF Y/N HEARS MY HEART

Bucky: it beats for Y/N…

Sam has added Steve, Clint.

Sam: ODIN’S BEARD, LOOK AT BUCKY

Thor has joined the chat.

Thor: My fathers beard?

Tony: HAS ANYONE SEEN HIM LIKE THIS

Sam: I’M CRYING

Thor: Do you require a hug?

Tony: WHY’S HE SO SAPPY ALL OF A SUDDEN

Thor: He is now a tree?

Steve: Buck? Are you feeling okay? It’s only your first date with Y/N…

Clint: Imagine what he’ll be like on the second date…

Thor: Fear not, Barnes. We shall guide you on this joyous occasion!

Bucky: Thanks, Thor. I’m unfriending the rest of you. Jerks.

Steve: Even ME?!

Steve: bucky

Steve: I didn’t do anything

Steve: BUCKY

Steve: Rethink this

Natasha has joined the chat.

Natasha: Which one of you idiots upset Steve?

Steve: BUCKY WE’RE STILL FRIENDS RIGHT?

Natasha: Really, Bucky!? You’re texting us while you’re with Y/N?

Sam: He needs our help.

Natasha: I can see that…

Tony: Drape an arm around Y/N.

Sam: Ask Y/N if they’d like more snacks.

Thor: If Y/N is cold, offer your cape!

Bucky: I can do that

Bucky: Sure

Bucky: Easy

Bucky: Simple

Bucky: I got this

Clint: Are you 6?

Clint: You’re not going to get “cooties” if you touch Y/N.

Bucky: HOW’D YOU KNOW I WAS NERVOUS ABOUT THAT

Clint: I know everything.

Thor: Everything?

Clint: Everything.

Tony: What kind of things?

Clint: Everything.

Steve: You got lucky on ONE guess.

Natasha: Remember the time we all went on that one mission where Clint had no idea what was going on?

Thor: Aye! He thought it was a simple rescue mission. Fool!

Steve: It’s hard to believe he survived it.

Tony: So much for knowing everything.

Clint: don’t out me like this

Bucky: So I put my arm around Y/N and Y/N leaned in and oh

Bucky: WAIT Y/N ALMOST SAW THE CHAT

Wade has joined the chat.

Wade: And you managed to get a date with Y/N how? I’ve been trying for years!

Thor: Greetings, Wade!

Sam: Thor don’t engage him.

Wade: I know something about you.

Sam: What?

Wade: You went to Cranbrook, that’s a private school.

Sam: No, I did not.

Wade: What’s the matter dawg? You embarrassed? 

Sam: No?

Wade: This guy’s an Avenger? His real name’s Clarence.

Sam has left the chat.

Wade: He’s shook.

Thor: Sam’s real name is Clarence?

Clint: Oh boy.

Bucky: HELLO REMEMBER ME YES ME

Tony: Just watch the movie! I don’t see how you can mess it up.

Wade: Oh you can mess it up.

Wade: You’d be surprised at the number of ways to ruin that.

Natasha: Talking from experience?

Wade: No, I’m perfect.

Thor: Of course you are, Wade!

Wade: I love you.

Thor: That is nice…

Thor has left the chat.

Clint: REJECTION!

Wade: SHUT UP CLINTON!

Clint: YOU SHUT UP!

Steve: Kids, please. Now is not the time.

Bucky: What is wrong with you two?

Bucky: No wonder Y/N never went out with you, Wade.

Clint: REJECTIOOOOOON!

Wade: Clint.

Wade: I’m going to make you some hot chocolate. Tuck you in. Sing you a lullaby. Read you a story. Gently stroke your hair. AND THEN STRANGLE YOU!

Steve: TIME OUT YOU TWO!

Tony: Must be stressful being a superdad to so many superkids.

Steve: You’d never know since YOU DON’T HELP

Tony: I PAY FOR EVERYTHING!

Wade: Can you buy me a new Katana? I’m going to need a new one when I’m done with Clint. 

Tony: No.

Wade: Don’t you dare fucking say it, Clint.

Clint: REJECTIOOOOOOOOON!!!!!!!!!!!!

Clint has been disconnected.

Wade has left the chat.

Bucky: Is he dead? He’s dead.

Y/N has joined the chat.

Bucky has been disconnected.

Tony: CODE Y/N! ABORT! IT’S TOO LATE FOR BUCKY! SAVE YOURSELVES!

Tony has left the chat.

Y/N: Hi! So which one of you is responsible for getting Bucky and I kicked out from the movie?

Natasha: Wait, what?

Y/N: He was on his phone the whole time! It was distracting the people next to us.

Steve: Why did he get disconnected? Is he…?

Y/N: He didn’t want us to get kicked out. He got upset and crushed his phone.

Steve: Are they… you know… dead?

Y/N: No, Steve. Bucky did not murder anyone over this.

Natasha: Did you at least have a good time?

Y/N: YES! HE IS SO SWEET!

Y/N: WE ALREADY HAVE OUR SECOND DATE PLANNED!

Y/N: I’M SO EXCITED!

Steve: Probably not as excited as Bucky.

Y/N: Wanna join us for some ice cream?

Natasha: Yeah!

Steve: See you in 10 minutes! 

Y/N: I didn’t tell you where we are though…

Natasha: Steve’s overprotective of you and Bucky. I’m one of the best spy’s in the world.

Steve: Nat.

Natasha: …. and also very overprotective of you.

Y/N: … Please don’t follow Bucky and I on our honeymoon if we get married.

Natasha: No promises!

Y/N has left the chat.

Natasha has left the chat.

Steve has left the chat.

The truth of the matter is that black men and the rest of society doesn’t value black women outside of sexualized ideals. 

Every time it’s time to praise us we’re “Sun kissed skin, chocolate, cocoa, hershey, baby oil wearing sex goddesses,rose thorn afro crown wearing queens”.


What happens when black women are not sexy. Are not sun kissed. Our skin isn’t perfect like cocoa or chocolate? We’re not pretty, we’re not queens, we’re not wearing afros? We don’t have the perfectly sculpted oiled up bodies yall love? 

Are we no longer valuable to you anymore? Oh that’s right we’re marginalized instead and invisible.

That’s why it’s important for black women specifically marginalized black women to assess and dissect people’s example of “support” for black women because 9 times out of 10 it’s not universal or unconditional.

stranded || dylan o'brien (part one)

word count: 1954

warnings: death

prompt: none (prologue)

author’s note: this took forever to post and i am so sorry! i know it’s really short, but the next part will be a lot more interesting i promise! i hope you like this

tags: @ sharenaloveyoux

masterlist

Keep reading

Shallura headcanons because WHY NOT
  • Shiro and Allura both love to goof around but only when it’s just the two of them
  • They both feel like they have to be the Sensible Mature Responsible Leaders around the other Paladins
  • but around each other they can just be Allura and Shiro, two complete dorks
  • It’s how they blow off steam okay it’s therapeutic
  • Shiro knows all the words AND dance moves to Uptown Funk and he does it for Allura because it makes her laugh until she can’t breathe
  • Allura’s shapeshifting ability has a weird side-effect: she can also mimic peoples voices. She can do near-perfect impressions of all the Paladins and Coran and she does it for Shiro because she highkey loves making him laugh
  • They do impressions of each other FIGHT ME THEY WOULD DO THIS OKAY THEY’RE HUGE DORKS
  • PLAYFIGHTING THAT GETS REALLY COMPETITIVE REALLY QUICKLY
  • Shiro talks to the mice and pretends to have conversations with them about Allura while Allura is sitting right there
  • “Oh, she likes sparkly things huh? Good to know I’ll keep my eyes out.” “Shiro I’m sitting RIGHT HERE” “What’s that? She’s getting annoyed?” *Allura throws a pillow at the back of his head* 
  • I LIVE FOR DORKY SPACE PARENTS OKAY 

Oh and also FUCK Simon. How do you tell your son, who you did nothing but groom to be the perfect king his entire life “just kidding. You’re not actually good enough to be king”??? Like how do you say that to someone who’s had no other direction in life except this inevitable destiny and then snatch it away from them because they’re supposedly not good enough? You know that’s just asking for revenge and anger right? Liam is NOT in the right here. I don’t care if Liam is Mother Theresa herself, the crown is NOT HIS. It was never his. It doesn’t matter if he would be better or not because that is ROBERT’S place. Liam is no less of an entitled brat than Cyrus, fighting for something that was never his to begin with. And building up Liam by dragging Robert down is obviously going to create resentment from Robert towards Liam. Robert was told by his father that he’d rather abolish the monarchy than give him a chance to prove himself as king. That is a shitty thing to say to your son. Even if you didn’t see the qualities in him to be a good king, instead of putting him down, you could help him. Like literally what kind of fucking father even was Simon? What kind of KING? And then, AND THEEENNNN Robert comes home, runs to the girl he was in love with who got him through the island, and what do you know? She’s sleeping with his brother. You know, the brother that his dad told him was better than him. 

In conclusion: idk why y’all are mad at Robert when he’s just the very justifiably angry product of a shitty dad who set him up for failure.

valentines day

this is gross and generic please ignore me

word count: 1.8k 


Valentines Day.

Any other year of your life, you had despised the day, mocking the lovey dovey couples in the corridor who exchanged chocolates and roses and kisses and ugh- couldn’t they do it somewhere else? Why did they have to promote their oh-so-perfect relationships right in the hallway, for everyone to see? 

But not this year, no, this year, you had Stiles- god, you could think of thousands upon thousands of words to describe Stiles and the indescribable emotions he made you feel; happiness, admiration and love.

You came to realize; you hadn’t despised Valentines Day, you had envied it.

But not anymore.

Keep reading

Simsrena: Valentine’s Edition

A belated addition to the Valentine’s Berens fest but I’m sure I’ll be forgiven when I tell you that Bernie took Serena away for Valentine’s Day and they spent the day in a hot tub. 

Oh yes. 

You read that right. 

A hot tub.

Originally posted by pitch-perfect-movie

I mean, perfect Valentine’s Day right? 

Well… it’s about to get even better because I quickly found out that you can woohoo in the hot tub. 

Woohoo!!! In the HOT TUB!!!! 

Oh yeah…

I know!

Originally posted by yourreactiongifs