oh my god it doesn't work

Batfam as things my coworkers have said
  • Bruce, overheard on the phone as he's leaving WE: Wait, your brother is at work? (...) Oh thank god, that means I can sleep when I get home.
  • ---------------
  • Dick, giving Duke a tour of the Batcave: I'm sure you'll fit in just fine. Everyone's really nice here. Except for Jason.
  • Jason, from across the cave: That's messed up!
  • ---------------
  • Stephanie: *sees Cass's hand is bandaged up* Oh my god, are you okay?
  • Cass: Yeah, I just stabbed myself. It's fine.
  • ---------------
  • Tim: What, you think that because you're bootylicious, you can do whatever you want?
  • Jason, nodding: Yeah, pretty much.
  • ---------------
  • Damian: Alfred knows everything, he just pretends that he doesn't.
  • Alfred: Well, somebody needs to know something around here.
  • ---------------
  • Stephanie, inspecting Tim's under-eye circles: You need some makeup, fam. That shit is unsettling.
  • ---------------
  • Dick, to Roy: I hereby name you an official member of the family!
  • Jason: It's a trap, dude. You don't wanna be part of this family.
  • ---------------
  • Tim: Has anyone seen my coffee?
  • All: No.
  • Tim: Looks like it sucks to be Steph today. *picks up Stephanie's coffee and walks away*
  • ---------------
  • Duke: You've gotta be crazy to work here.
  • Jason: You don't HAVE to be crazy. We can always train you.
  • ---------------
  • WE Employee: *walks into Bruce's office to hear a loud alarm coming from his computer while Bruce fills out paperwork, seemingly unperturbed*
  • WE Employee: How can you just sit there and listen to that?
  • Bruce: Do you have any idea how many kids I have?
4

Okay so this is a little complicated and I’ll do my best to explain.

It’s a crossover between Be More Chill and Dear Evan Hansen. Jeremy and Michael take the place of Evan and Connor and vice versa

I couldn’t decide whether they should keep whether they have glasses or not so I went with both.

I also couldn’t decide if it should be Michael on Jeremy’s cast or Boyf so I did both. That should explain all the minor differences. God, this is overly complicated.

or maybe it’s not and you all understand it and I wasted my time explaining it oh well

I may be mildly proud of my “#YouWillBeMoreChill” and it might’ve taken way too long to come up with a good name for “Be Less Forgotten” but with my friends, I was able to come up with that. (one suggested “Be less suicidal”)

Gladio: New spectacles, huh, Iggy?
Ignis: Why, yes, thank you for noticing.
Gladio: ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)  Well…if I may say-
Ignis: Oh god no.
Gladio: You look-
Ignis: Do not, I beg.
Gladio: spectacular.

9

welcome to the league of flower crowns. → 2/???

super spooky purple void edition. look at those monsters. look at how they can give you nightmares and visions of horrible things and silence you from ever saying a thing about it. aren’t they cute? :)

(as requested by anonymous + @voidreaver-khazix. credit not necessary, likes/reblogs appreciated.)

anonymous asked:

Hi Sophie! I was wondering if you knew of some good enemies to lovers fics. The length or rating doesn't matter. Thanks for all that you do ❤️

oh my god yes, i have a few. not that it’s my favourite trope or anything

Enemies to lovers

  • Lightning Strikes the Heart [4/4] by @thebravestprincess. what can i say about this one? it has it all. it’s long ( this is how enemies to lovers is supposed to be. there is running in both directions. you’re gonna be exasperated at times but the resolution will be worth it
  • A Thin Line by @curiousthingdarkness​ Killian Jones and Emma Swan have at least one thing in common: their mutual hatred for each other. When a work assignment forces them to be around each other they discover that perhaps the lines between emotions are sometimes difficult to distinguish. (Modern CS AU) 
  • settle on down with me by @saramck​ Killian has a soft spot for blondes in yellow rain coats and cut-off jean shorts. Emma has a soft spot for punching country boys with dirty mouths.~7,000 words / Rated T
  • strangeness and charm and edit by @bluestoplights​  Killian Jones is a pirate captain down on his luck after a falling out with the Evil Queen. Emma Swan just found out she was the Savior. Their shared goals bring them on an epic quest to liberate the kingdom once and for all. It’s a lot easier said than done.
  • No Way In Hell and edit by @effulgentcolors​  Heartthrob Killian Jones and Hollywood’s ice queen Emma Swan are chasing their dreams, hating each other since before their first meeting and thinking they will just have to tolerate the other while the shooting of their latest movie lasts. But there’s some fine print on their contracts and it seems that they don’t know quite what they have signed up for, both on and off set.
  • Rack ‘em Up by @always-a-slut-for-pirates​   Emma and Killian are professional pool players that both live in Boston and frequent the same pool hall. Emma had always found him insufferable. But when fate forces her to get to know the man behind the cocky attitude she starts to question everything she thought she knew. 
  • Unfinished Business by @ive-always-been-a-pirate Having her bakery on the block adjacent to that stupid floral shop had always been so frustrating for Emma Swan. It was just her luck that the place’s owner, an arrogant Irishman named Killian Jones, thrived on pressing her buttons and making life as a small business owner so complicated. So what will happen when two stubborn people unexpectedly start mixing business with pleasure? 
  • Kindred Spirits by @captndevil​  Emma Swan hates Killian Jones - he’s arrogant and self centered but she’s stuck with him for the foreseeable future with them running in the same circles. What happens when she agrees to go camping with her friends, Killian included, and what will happen when she has to get in a car with him, alone? Modern AU. 
  • Crossing Party Lines by @onceuponajollyroger  Captain Swan, Modern AU: When Emma Nolan teams up with her brother’s best friend, and her personal rival, Killian Jones, to plan the ultimate surprise birthday party, Emma’s the one who is in for quite a surprise. 
  • Shut Up and Dance With Me by @passing-fanciful  The weather outside is frightful, leaving Emma and Killian trapped alone together in David’s New Hampshire cabin with a lot of unresolved feelings and no place to go. 
  • I Choose You by @mayquita  When Emma Swan’s brother and his fiancee decide to get married, she suddenly becomes the maid of honor. Although she is not very fond of weddings, her sister-in-law-to-be assigns her a mission, helping her with the wedding photographer’s choice. What she didn’t expect is that they are the ones who need to be chosen by the photographer, who turns out to be an insufferable Irishman. His name, Killian Jones.
  • Don’t Like You, Maybe I Do by @ahsagitarius
  • Me: *puts my hand in my hair to itch my scalp*
  • Me: ho don't do it
  • Me: *starts pulling out hair instead*
  • Me: oh my god

Fish: “And as for you, whoever you may be…" 

Oswald: “Oh, this man here? His name is Edward. Edward Nygma. That’s spelled E, as in Edward… D, W-”

Ed: "Dammit, Oswald!!!”

Oswald: “Sometimes he goes by Ed, or Eddie…”

Ed: “Stopppp iiiiiiittttt!!!!!”

anonymous asked:

Hey could you please do a Moriarty (form Sherlock) x Reader fic where he doesn't know how to express his feelings, but he always likes to sit next of the Reader because it helps him concentrate when he is working or relax when he is stressed. Thanks oxox

Pairing: Jim Moriarty x Reader
Fandom: BBC Sherlock
Warnings: almost smut, lol (also some swear words)

A/N: gaaaaah! THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR THIS REQUEST BABE! oh my god, I love jim so so so much and I’ve been looking forward to writing this request for ages and finally managed to write something! so yeah, hope you enjoy it <333

                                                             *****

Jim Moriarty wasn’t someone that wore his heart on his sleeve.

You and him had been having.. something, for a while now, yet, you didn’t know what this thing exactly was - given that he never talks about such matters.

The sex was good, though, so you didn’t want to complicate things by having the ‘What are we?’ talk. If what you were having now is all that he wanted, fine by you. If he wanted more, he’d hopefully tell you. Or show you.

That’s how it’s been for a few months. But one day, you realized that the ‘just sex’ part, developed into something.. different.

Keep reading

It finally happened. Some dudebro on Twitter decided to take it upon himself to give me some advice about my art, then got angry when I didn’t fall at his feet in gratitude, and proceeded to lay all his insecurities out for the world to see tell me how much money he makes and how famous he is and how he could have given me the opportunity of a lifetime but I was mean to him so I missed my chance.

He’s still ranting.

It’s beautiful.

Hamilton, an American Musical: a summary
  • Alexander Hamilton: Damn, this kid survived and then some
  • Aaron Burr, Sir: I have no idea what I'm doing
  • My Shot: But it seems like none of you do either!
  • The Story of Tonight: We have heartwarming aspirations
  • The Schuyler Sisters: Fuck the patriarchy
  • Farmer Refuted: Bro the king's not going to do anything
  • You'll Be Back: Oh shit, I guess he is
  • Right Hand Man: Desk work??? You've got to be kidding
  • Winter's Ball: I think we're drunk
  • Helpless: This is the best love story ever
  • Satisfied: Never mind
  • The Story of Tonight Reprise: We're definitely drunk
  • Wait For It: Surprise, surprise! I do have ambitions!
  • Stay Alive: THIS FUCKING GUY
  • Ten Duel Commandments: Could this be foreshadowing? Nah
  • Meet Me Inside: I done fucked up
  • That Would Be Enough: Apparently my wife doesn't mind
  • Guns and Ships: We're kicking ass. Alex! Come kick ass with us!
  • History Has Its Eyes on You: Okay son time to tell you how the world works
  • Yorktown: Everyone's kicking ass except the British
  • What Comes Next?: Time for King George to have a hissy fit
  • Dear Theodosia: This love is so pure oh my god
  • Non-Stop: I'm still kicking ass but now I'm a lawyer
  • What'd I Miss: All-American dance party
  • Cabinet Battle #1: Well I lost that argument AND control of my emotions!
  • Take a Break: Sorry fam I have to stay here and obsess over banks
  • Say No to This: An affair? Well, I'm only a politician with a lot of money. What could possibly go wrong?
  • The Room Where It Happens: Politics are frustrating
  • Schuyler Defeated: Is this about me? Of course it is. Everything's about me
  • Cabinet Battle #2: Screw France we gotta look out for America
  • Washington On Your Side: We like to call ourselves the Bitter Squad
  • One Last Time: You guys are exhausting I'm out
  • I Know Him: Your baby nation antics are amusing to me
  • The Adams Administration: I will roast everyone
  • We Know: Okay now I know what could go wrong
  • Hurricane: My past is sad
  • The Reynolds Pamphlet: Turns out I will also roast myself
  • Burn: Alex is a self centered little shit
  • Blow Us All Away: I'm my father's son: combative and full of pride
  • Stay Alive Reprise: Whoops
  • It's Quiet Uptown: There could not be a worse coincidence than that stupid pamphlet and our son's death
  • The Election of 1800: Okay I know I'm supposed to be grieving but here's one final roast for y'all
  • Your Obedient Servant: Passive aggressive fight turns into real fight
  • Best of Wives and Best of Women: The hell are you going boy
  • The World Was Wide Enough: Whoops Pt 2
  • Who Lives, Who Dies, Who Tells Your Story: Eliza wins the prize for best character growth you can all go home
  • Bokuto: god I'm just so frustrated nothing works out! Damn it!
  • Kuroo: oh my god bokuto will you just stop-
  • Kuroo: -breaking yourself like this. Come here babe. Come into my arms. You know what? You deserve the whole world. Look at you. You're so stunningly beautiful that I sometimes forget how to breathe. You guide your team so perfectly, you're a great captain, and it's normal to have a stressful day from time to time. That doesn't make you a bad Person especially because you can't control your mood swings. Please know I'm here for you and that you can always talk to me. I will never hate you or be mad at you for being yourself. I love you more than anything bo.
DRAGGING THE SIGNS
  • -Please also check MOON & DOMINANT-
  • Aries: just because you talk loud doesn't mean you're right.
  • You are very aggressive and stubborn but you can't even make a valid point.
  • Please stop acting like you "just attract drama" and "can't help it"
  • Because you create the drama and like attention ffs just be honest
  • Taurus: You are so fucking stubborn.
  • To be honest it's a pain in the ass, please learn to act less like a brat and accept that you can't be right every time.
  • Also stop acting like you are a saint, because that act doesn't really work for you.
  • Gemini: oh my lord. Fucking hypocrites, like I can't even.
  • For example; You'll get mad when someone talks shit about you
  • But when you talk shit about them it's ok?
  • You aren't God jfc, get over yourself
  • Also control your mood swings, you're confusing as fuck and that's why no one gets you
  • So fix that and stop complaining about how you and your feelings are being "misunderstood"
  • Cancer: So so so so sensitive,
  • Like it's one of your best traits but also your worst
  • You cry about everything and you always act like you're the victim.
  • Maybe it works when you're 5 but when you're all grown up people will just see you as childish and immature.
  • Playing the victim won't help you in the real world.
  • Leo: hm i don't even know where to start, you are soooo full of yourself
  • You make friends to stay relevant and when you're done with them you just drop them.
  • You are kinda loud just like Aries.
  • you'll tell someone they are pretty and as soon as they turn around you'll just make fun of them
  • Virgo: you guys always want to be in control of all kinds of projects.
  • You like to have everything clean, neat and figured out.
  • You'll boil up your irritations when someone doesn't do something your way or "the right way" and then just explode and complain about everything
  • It isn't healthy and you come off as rude and unthankful.
  • Libra: You can be so two faced, honestly you're everything that the gemini gets hated for, and most people don't even realise it.
  • You act like you're so holy but talk mad shit and create soooo much drama, but somehow manage to stay out of it?
  • Scorpio: You have terrible mood swings.
  • And it's because you act tougher than you are, but you can't keep up the facade
  • You'll act all strong and shit and like you don't have any feelings.
  • But when you're all alone you could cry yourself to sleep.
  • The most sensitive of all the signs
  • Please stop hiding it because this whole tough and no emotions act makes you look unapproachable, nobody wants to be friends with some mechanic robot with unbreakable walls around them
  • Sagittarius: You are really what people say.
  • You just don't give a single shit about anyone's feelings except your own.
  • You'll pick out someone and make them love you because it's just for "fun", but as soon as they'll say the 3 words you just flee and go onto the next one.
  • You can drop the important people in your life without a single second of doubt, you're so impulsive
  • Watch out because you'll regret it
  • Capricorn: cold shits, you are almost incapable of loving.
  • You don't focus on the people around you, people are here for you
  • And all you do is put them aside to do the things that you want.
  • Every step you take is to reach another and higher destination.
  • But one day all of that will fade away and you'll be all alone because you ignored the ones that loved you and pushed them aside
  • Aquarius: You want to be unique so fucking bad.
  • No one is allowed to do something you do or steal something you already did.
  • Everyone else is boring and not good enough and basic.
  • You cut people off as soon as they say or do anything unoriginal.
  • You look down on people and it's not attractiv, stop it please you aren't God
  • Pisces: Every sweet thing you do is fake.
  • It's just to make people feel bad for you as soon as you fuck up (and you fuck up a lot)
  • As soon as someone gets mad at you you'll curl up into a little ball and act like they're the bad guy
  • They hurt you, you did all those things for them.
  • You're the type to make people feel bad for you being an asshole
  • stop being sweet to people without really caring about the
  • -
  • -
  • -and as always reblog for more
I JUST NEED TO EDIT IT!

Oh guys- thanks for being so patient! 
Saran’s chapter is done! 
16K later. 

Someone please teach me how to do head canons properly. I have a problem, 
I’ll try to edit during my breaks at work otherwise I hope for it to be up on here tomorrow between 2-3pm Australian Eastern Stand Time. 

This would be a good time to read the story that this slight AU takes place from, Saeran’s To Borrow #6 HC. It literally takes place right after :) 

Oh guys- this just means I need to write V’s and then I can start angst fest and smut fest!!! WOOOHOOOO! 

Originally posted by daburupurei

anonymous asked:

The way you draw Seabury makes me so happy omg pls never ever stop drawing your art is perfect and flawless - An asexual who doesn't really understand why she enjoys this porn blog so much (probably because the art is phenomenal)

OMMHGDGGS AAAAAHHHH THANK YOU SO MUCH!!! oh my god this is so sweet THANK YOU!!! im glad you enjoy how i draw seabury even if hes constantly involved in nsfw works im crying

HERE i drew him seriously and not getting destroyed for once!!

THANK YOU AGAIN!!! AAHHH THANK YOU

MBTI Types in school: Science Class
  • INTJ: Finishes the work impossibly quickly, even in biology, which is their least favourite field. Criticises the teacher's spelling.
  • INTP: Not listening because they're either playing a video game or already performing some kind of chemical reaction in the back of the room (that was not part of the class plan).
  • ENTJ: Already studying for the test at the end of the semester. Part of 'criticise teacher's spelling' brigade with INTJ.
  • ENTP: Gets bored halfway through class and decides to dob on INTP. Contributes some interesting random facts (that are related to science, but not really the subject of the class).
  • INFJ: Actually super good at science although you wouldn't know it. Still spends most of class looking out the window though.
  • INFP: Contemplating the reason for human existence. Roped into doing unplanned experiment with INTP.
  • ENFJ: "This goes against my morals" when dissecting anything or experimenting on any life form.
  • ENFP: Can be heard saying "Oh my god the colours are so pretty!" but has no idea what is going on. Gets really excited when they know the answer to stuff. Accidentally knocks over a rack of test tubes.
  • ISTJ: Cringing at INTP and INFP, although mostly because they know that the reaction they're trying to perform won't work.
  • ISFJ: Always sitting in the middle row. Scared of breaking equipment but otherwise enjoying the subject. Silently agrees with ENFJ's statements and feels bad when the have to constantly ask the teacher to re-explain concepts.
  • ESTJ: Top of the class, although gets frustrated when the lesson doesn't follow plans (which is very often, considering all the XNXP's antics)
  • ESFJ: Complaining about ESTJ, although they secretly get frustrated by this too. Mostly talking during class though.
  • ISTP: Finishes the work to a high standard pretty early, but never tells the teacher and just goes on with free time for the remaining 45 minutes of class.
  • ISFP: Drawing pretty patterns in margains of workbook. Not really listening to the teacher though.
  • ESTP: Sitting with ESFJ and making negative comments about the teacher and classmates. They don't actually mind science, but they'd still just rather be doing sport.
  • ESFP: Volunteers to be part of a demonstration, but is left standing there alone after ENFP breaks the equipment.

anonymous asked:

imagine if they needed to a true love's kiss and clary tries to kiss jace to wake him up but it does not work. magnus looks at maia and says, "go for it, mango." maia doesn't get it because she thinks there is no way she can wake jace up again by a kiss. so she gives jace a true love's kiss and he wakes up. he realizes that maia has given him a tlk and he smiles and says, "i was hoping it'd be you."

THERE’S JUST SO MUCH GOING ON HERE ANON, MY HEART!!!!! go for it mango, oh my god magnus giving maia a nickname is truly what i need. maia thinking she’s not enough to wake jace up? JACE HOPING IT’D BE MAIA. DON’T. I’M.

The Greatest Thing Just Happened In Class...
  • Friends: *casually just chatting about deep and mystic issues*
  • Friend 1: So I heard about these things called tulpas...
  • Me: *attempting not to seem too surprised and excited* Oh, really?
  • Friend 1: Yeah, do you know what I'm talking about?
  • Me: You could say that....
  • Friend 1: Do you think it works?
  • Friend 2: Of course it doesn't work...
  • Me: It seems to work pretty fucking well for me.
  • Friends: *stunned silence for a few seconds*
  • Friend 1: *leans in conspiratorially with childish wonder*
  • Friend 1: Oh my god, is yours in the room right now?
  • Me: *looks over at Des, who's sat behind Friend 1*
  • Des: Can I hit the idiots?
  • Me: ...Yeah, they're in the room.
  • Friend 1: Woah... that's awesome.