oh my god i'm not even making sense and and and

there were a lot of references in the new video, did you catch them all? let’s take a look.

1. nils sjoberg

remember that time she wrote a song with calvin harris but used a different name? this is that name, on one of the gravestones. after releasing that she had actually written the summer hit “this is what you came for,” calvin harris, among others, threw a fit on twitter - even though it had been agreed that if calvin and taylor broke up, she could express that she had written the song.

2. the out of the woods dress

this blue dress probably looks familiar! it’s the same one she wore in the out of the woods music video, the last music video of the 1989 era. this poses the same frantic question, are we out of the woods yet? as this grave-digging taylor suggests, not yet.

3. here lies 2014 met gala taylor

at first glance, it just looks like the taylor from before laying there, but after pausing it and going back, one realizes that isn’t zombie taylor, rather 2014 met gala taylor. 2014 would have been the start of the 1989 era, and the out of the woods video was the end of it, thus: by the end of 1989 era, she was ready to “bury” it.

4. the dollar bill

if you look just next to taylor’s shoulder, you can see a good ole george washington. one single dollar bill. is this a reference to taylor’s sexual assault trial recently, and the one dollar she won then? most likely, because if you go to other shots of her in the tub that aren’t directly above her, the dollar bill isn’t there, meaning it was edited in later, which would explain how it got there so late in the game. it stands for the simple victories everyone else gets to celebrate, while she does the same things and gets flack for it.

5. et tu brute

a famous line from shakespeare’s julius caeser, “et tu, brute” means “and you, brute?” right as marcus brutus lands the fatal blow in julius caeser’s, his once-friend’s back. this is a metaphor for all the people that taylor thought she could trust, before they turned around and trashed her name.

6. the tea

probably pretty simple to grasp - the tea is hot. alternatively, she, the snake in the video, gets to serve the tea this time around, or, she gets to lay down her side of the story.

7. car crash + paparazzi

did you see what happened here, at face value? taylor was in an expensive vehicle that got in a head-on crash, but everyone just stood back and took pictures, instead of rushing over to help. is this a reference to all the times that everyone stood back, took pictures, and laughed at her when she was beaten down? yes.

8. the grammy

the grammy blends in with the gold of the car and her outfit, so it’s pretty easy to miss, but there it is, in her hand, even though the car crashed. perhaps the future is being predicted?

9. the birdcage + leg tattoo

look closely at taylor’s leg, and you can see what looks to be a snake tattooed there. not to mention, here she is entertaining in a birdcage, which is guarded. she’s trying to have fun in this prison, biting her tongue, being the girl everyone wants, but she longs to be let free.

10. robbing a bank/stream co., blind for love

besides getting major harley quinn vibes, what else do we notice here? taylor swift robbing a vault, which says “stream company.” remember that time that taylor wrote an open letter to apple music and called her money hungry, even though she was taking her music off to benefit poorer artists? yes, we do. this is what she’s referencing here. also, her shirt says “blind for love” which makes sense, because she frequently refers to herself as a hopeless romantic, someone who opens theirselves up for love, even if it means getting hurt.

11. the squad

without explaining anything else, this scene can be described as a crowd of blank faced people, staring at taylor swift, who stands upon a stage looking menacing, and impressing one message upon the crowd: u, squad. it’s reminiscent of all the times people said taylor swift was over, because her friends, fans, or sales were fake or temporary. this is like a visual representation of the comments people made about taylor forcing people to do things for her to create the image she desired.

12. fake friends

and here we have the mannequins of the girls from the prior scene, chopped up. this one is pretty straight forward, these “friends” that taylor thought she had sometimes turned out to be more fickle and “fake” than she thought. also, can we talk about how taylor’s red boots are reminiscent of kinky boots? because yes.

13. the dancers, i heart ts

before taylor enters the room, the dancers are goofing around, but the second she comes in, the jump to attention, and rip off their jackets to reveal shirts that say “i heart ts.” it’s a throwback to when tom hiddleston wore a shirt with the same message on the fourth of july in 2016, and everyone said that she had forced him to wear it. it’s the same thing as before with the squad - the world decided that she had forced all these people to love her, not that they actually did.

14. the fight for glory

every time you pause this video, you come across a different taylor. squirrel pajamas wanegbt taylor, 2015 bbma’s taylor, 2014 acm’s taylor, wanegbt red tour taylor, 2016 new years rockin’ eve taylor, sparkly guitar fearless tour taylor, bleachella taylor, ballerina shake it off taylor, 2016 vma’s taylor… the list goes on and on. here, you can see them all fighting and clawing, trying to stand on top. it reminds me of “i don’t like your kingdom keys, they once belonged to me,” and the parallels between long live and new romantics in that line alone. all those times, she thought she’d made it to a point in her career where she could be respected as much as other artists in her tier, only to harshly realize she was going to get her name ran through the mud for doing the same thing as everyone else. the fight for glory is steep, and unfair.

15. junior jewels

looks familiar right? not quite! it is the same theme of the shirt, but look closely at the signatures - they’re signatures of actual people this time around. names like ed, selena, este, lena, blake, and ryan, among others, can be seen on her shirt, representing the true friends that stuck with her through her reputation being bashed.

16. “SHUT UP!”

here, all the different versions of taylor are repeating things that the media or other celebrities had said about her, until finally 2009 vma’s taylor repeated the same thing that 2017 taylor said in an instagram post - “i’d very much like to be excluded from this narrative.” the entire time, you can hear camera shutters going off and people chatting, presumably the rest of the world watching as she got torn apart. when vma’s taylor makes this final statement, all the other taylor’s, as well as what sounds to be an entire off-screen crowd, yell “SHUT UP” before the screen goes black. this is a powerful image, and it’s supposed to be. all the times she suffered, and people told her that she was overreacting, faking it, or doing it for publicity. if you feel remorse for seeing young taylor getting yelled at, or sorrow for the taylors falling when she said “because she’s dead,” you’re doing it right. 

nothing in this video was an accident.

if you’re angry at taylor for this video exposing things you said about her, or you’re repeating any of the words the versions of herself said at the end, you’re proving her point. her reputation was destroyed because people made a sport of making fun of her. and now, as taylor said, there will be no explanation, just reputation. 

Things We Learnt From the First Wave of EW Coverage

1. Luke believed Ben Solo was the chosen one

[Luke] made a huge mistake in thinking that his nephew was the chosen one, so he invested everything he had in Kylo, much like Obi-Wan did with my character,” Hamill says. “And he is betrayed, with tragic consequences. Luke feels responsible for that. That’s the primary obstacle he has to rejoining the world and his place in the Jedi hierarchy, you know? It’s that guilt, that feeling that it’s his fault, that he didn’t detect the darkness in him until it was too late.”

LOL, what a mess.

2. Luke gives Rey a chilly reception - and forces her to confront her sense of abandonment afresh

Luke definitely does not give Rey the warm welcome he received when he went in search of Alec Guinness’ Ben Kenobi in 1977’s original Star Wars. She is warned. She is given an explanation. Nevertheless …“She’s so hopeful to everything,” Ridley says. “And obviously there’s a hint of, ‘What the hell?’”

This rejection hits Rey’s abandonment issues. Hard.

Luke’s brush-off makes Rey miss the gruff warmth of Han Solo, Ridley says, giving us a peek inside the head of her character: “’Oh my God, this other man that I lost within a couple days was somewhat of a father figure. Now he’s gone, and instead I’m with this grumpy guy on an island who doesn’t want me here.’” 

But Ridley says Rey is also placing huge expectations on Luke. She arrives on the island of Ahch-To, site of a primitive Jedi temple, not to become a hero herself, but to shove Skywalker back into the fight. “I don’t think one girl, who he doesn’t know, turning up with a lightsaber is gonna make him go, ‘Oh, s—, yeah, of course I’ll get back into the action,’” Ridley says.

Poor bb Rey.

3. Kylo is fascinated by Rey 

As we know, the young scavenger was ditched as a child on the hardscrabble junkyard world of Jakku by unknown parents and left for years to survive on her own. But lately, she has gotten accustomed to making fast friends, like BB-8, Finn, Chewbacca, and General Leia Organa. Even the murderous Kylo Ren became fascinated by her strength and resilience after kidnapping her.

No shit.

4.  Ahch-To is home to a quasi-nunnery populated by vaguely amphibious caretakers - and they merely tolerate Luke Skywalker’s presence 

They’re kind of these sort of fish-bird type aliens who live on the island,” Johnson says. “They’ve been there for thousands of years, and they essentially keep up the structures on the island. They’re all female, and I wanted them to feel like a remote sort of little nunnery,” Johnson says. “Neal Scanlan’s crew designed them, and costume designer Michael Kaplan made these working clothes that also reflected sort of a nun-like, spartan sort of existence.”They can communicate with Luke through what Johnson describes as “a blubbery sort of Scottish fish talk” but they’re not thrilled to have him hanging around. Johnson says they “tolerate” his presence.

Please let this be Black Narcissus with extra aliens.

5. We’ll learn more about Snoke’s nature and goals - but don’t expect his lifestory

Johnson says The Last Jedi will reveal more about Snoke and his goals, but his history will remain somewhat murky. “Similar to Rey’s parentage, Snoke is here to serve a function in the story. And a story is not a Wikipedia page,” the filmmaker says. “For example, in the original trilogy, we didn’t know anything about the Emperor except what Luke knew about him, that he’s the evil guy behind Vader. Then in the prequels, you knew everything about Palpatine because his rise to power was the story.” In The Last Jedi, Johnson says, “we’ll learn exactly as much about Snoke as we need to.”

Hahahaha at all the emptiness of the inane Snoke speculation.

6. Snoke is no puppet on a string 

Will we see Snoke performed as a real-life puppet? “No, it’s entirely a mo-cap performance,” Johnson says. “[Creature designer] Neal Scanlan built a maquette that we had on set for lighting reference and to give the actors a sense of what it was going to feel like. And then we scanned that and [Industrial Light & Magic] used that in their renderings, but Snoke will be an entirely CG creation.”

Don’t take anything for granted - least of all spoiler reports!

7. Finn starts out desperate to leave the fight and find Rey 

It got really real for him,” Boyega tells EW. “And he just wants to get away and not be involved. His intention in the first place was to go to the Outer Rim. He was always brought back [in The Force Awakens,], but this is his chance to get away and perhaps find Rey and go off together. He’s trying to do that at first.”

I have a funny feeling of deja-vu!

8. Rose is a true nobody

Poe Dameron is super cool. Finn’s super cool. Even though [Rose] is good at what she does, she’s not known,” Tran says. “She’s not cool. She’s this nobody, this background player, which is what makes her interesting. She’s not the best. She’s not royalty. She’s someone who is just like everyone else.”

Rose is a gearhead, a grease monkey, a behind-the-scenes jack-of-all-trades, while her sister Paige (played by Veronica Ngo) is the dynamic one — a Resistance gunner who fights on the front lines alongside Resistance luminaries like Poe Dameron, Oscar Isaac’s X-wing ace.

Rose - nobody or not - sounds pretty awesome, imho.

9. Rose and Finn drive each other forward - but people can struggle to live up to others’ expectations

Rose is starstruck by Finn: “He appreciates the adoration for a second, but when he meets her, Finn is trying to escape the whole war. He’s trying to leave,” Boyega says. “And she comes in and basically gives him a depiction of himself that wasn’t necessarily true.” But he likes the impression Rose has, the vision she has of him. A good guy. A brave guy. Seeing himself through her eyes gives the ex-Stormtrooper something to live up to. “It’s now an opportunity for him to be the best he can be. He has to make a decision, and Rose is there to help him make that choice.”

It shouldn’t be a spoiler to reveal that, yes, she helps Finn stay in the fight, although the urge to get out is still burning inside him.

Also… living up to Rose’s high expectations is not a task anyone can truly fulfill.

Colour me intrigued…

Peter’s homemade suit

Can I just talk about how proud Peter was with his homemade Spider-Man suit? In the beginning of the film, he wasn’t aware that Tony Stark made him a suit so the kid brought his own costume. When he was filming everything he said “Okay, Peter. You got this. You got this.” while looking at the mirror looking nervous but excited at the same time because out of all the people, he was going to help Mr. Stark fight Captain America. 

So when Happy said, “What are you wearing?” Peter was so confused and the camera showed him looking down to his outfit while saying in such an innocent way, “It’s my suit!”

You can tell it in his tone of voice that this was something he was very proud of. He most likely even sewn it himself. It’s something a 15-year-old with not much allowance can come up with. It wasn’t about just looking cool (for a kid), it was something that he would be wearing around comfortably, swinging here and there. I mean, it’s made up of a hoodie, long sleeved shirt, and joggers. Tony may have made fun of it and called it pajamas, but it’s something Peter was happy about because he designed it himself and you can even notice the spider symbol on his hoodie chest was drawn using a sharpie. He didn’t have resources but he improvised.

His homemade web-shooters? According to the Art of the Movie book, his web shooters have two separate cases that contained two chemicals and when he presses the button, it mixes as it moves forward to produce his webbing. That’s pretty darn neat that he came up with it and manufactured it himself. And I absolutely loved the fact that he was making his web fluid during chemistry lab class in secret when his teacher wasn’t looking and that’s just pretty realistic because again, he didn’t have the materials at home. He’s a dumpster diver and I wouldn’t be surprised if his web-shooters initially came from that.

And his mask? It can squint and everything and then I realized, he made it especially like that because his senses are dialed to 11 and he needed to focus because there was just too much input for him. As much as possible, he’d like to prevent sensory overload. I liked the fact Tony took this into consideration as well since the new suit was able to do that too.

Peter’s a resourceful kid and I loved that about him. So when Happy showed him the new and improved suit made by Tony Stark, he was so over the moon and went “Oh my god. I-I… I don’t understand. Is it… is it for me?!” It was just so pure and the innocence around it was amazing.

And honestly? He deserved it. He deserved it so much and I’m so happy for him that he got a multi-million dollar suit and yet he still kept his first suit.

Ok so what if a Langst spy au??? Just hear me out……
•Shiro is still missing, everyone is expecting Keith to take over until they find Shiro
• they hear about prince lotor, but don’t have any information about him, so Allura and the blade of mamora are planning on sending in an undercover operative to have intel on him.
•lance accidentally walks in on the meeting, and over hears them talking about it.
• lance volunteers to go, thinking that this could be his chance to be able to lift his weight and not feel so much as the 7th wheel.
• Allura is not amused, refusing to send Lance in, cause she does care for him on some level, not that he knows this
• but Lance makes some really good points that it’s not exactly a secret that Lance and Keith don’t get along, that if Lance were to make a big enough argument with Keith, that it could get the Galra to be interested in trying to recruit him
• Allura concedes, cause it’s the best plan that she’s heard through the entire meeting. But she only lets him go on one condition: once they find Shiro, Lance has to come back as soon as possible.
•they all agree that the team shouldn’t know about the plan until after Lance has successfully infiltrated the Galra.
• the plan works great. And Lance is successfully apart of the Galra. And lotor is especially interested in Lance, which is good for the mission, not for Lance though.
•ALOT of creepy one-sided flirting. Lance promises to himself to apologize to Allura for all of his incessant flirting.
•bad news, is the team takes it HARD. First the lost Shiro and now Lance!
• hunk is just begging whatever god are out there that this is just some sort of nightmare and that he’ll wake up from it at any moment. He still believes that Lance will come back to the team.
• Pidge is pretty upset, and thinks that if they got Shiro back, then maybe he can talk some sense into Lance and bring him back.
•Keith is LIVID. He can’t believe that Lance betrayed them, that he had said all those things about him, and just turn his back on the team. Keith believes that Lance has completely turned his back on them, that he isn’t coming back.
• Allura can’t figure out how to tell the team that Lance didn’t actually betray them.
• fast forward to a week or two after the ‘betrayal’ they face off against lotor again, and lance as well.
• somehow Lance and Keith are fighting on a catwalk, about 5-6 stories high. And Keith isn’t holding back. He goes on and on about how lance is a traitor, and how he didn’t deserve to be apart of Voltron
• it definitely hurts lance, but lance has pretty much figured out that Allura hasn’t been able to tell the team yet. But he can’t tell Keith, or else his cover is blown.
•Keith takes swing at lance with his bayard, and puts a huge gash in his face.
• Keith kicks lance into the railing, only for it and lance to fall. But lance is able to catch himself barely on the catwalk, but his hand is too slippery, cover in his blood.
•lance calls for Keith, to help him. Lance knows Keith would let him fall.
•Keith lets him fall.
•it’s either, Keith was in a sort of angry frenzy that he didn’t realize lance was calling for him until it was too late, or something else.
•either way, Keith is sure that Lance is dead, and leaves. Not able to look at the dead body.
•but lance isn’t dead. He’s close to it, but not there yet.
•Lotor finds him and has haggar save his life. Of course, lance doesn’t come out of it whole.
• he had to have his complete spine replaced with one of haggar’s prosthetics. He has a scar on his face from Keith, and his arm had to be replaced as well. But he’s alive.
• to say that Allura is relieved when she gets communication from Lance is an understatement. Especially after Keith told them all that Lance was dead.
• lance still sends information and warnings about certain attacks and plans that the Galra have for months.
• then finally the others find Shiro, and Allura is so glad because that means that not only is Shiro back, but that Lance will come back as well.
• Lance sneaks back on to the castle during a battle between Lotor and the team. (Carrying a flash drive with as much information about lotor and the Galra as it can hold)
• Allura calls a retreat and the other paladins go to the bridge once they have successfully wormholed out of there. You can definitely say that they are surprised to see her talking to some random guy who looks a lot like…oh my god it’s Lance!
•you can definitely say that there are some mixed emotions.
•hunk is so happy! He knew it! Lance was alive! He’s back! He’s going to be okay!
•pidge is kind of weary of it. She’s not sure what to think, he might be back, or it might be a trick.
• Shiro is just confused. the others didn’t tell him about Lance ‘betraying’ them, or that they thought he died. He’s just trying to figure out where Lance came from.
• Keith is drawing his bayard and putting himself in between lance and the others, ready to strike.
•of course NOW is when Allura finally tells them all that Lance was undercover and spying on the Galra. Of course their pissed that they didn’t tell them, mostly at Allura cause she was suppose to as soon as Lance was in.
• Keith now feels like he is the biggest screw up in the room, cause he sees the scar on lance’s face. He realizes that he left his friend to die, even if he was under he idea that he betrayed them. He sees how lance’s eyes go stone cold when he looks at him. He knows that he lost Lance’s trust.

my alpha.

Originally posted by semejohn

pairing: derek hale x reader

warnings: SMUT, swearing, dirty talk, NSFW GIFS. porn without a plot, basically.

prompt: going into heat while living in the loft with derek being the only available alpha. 

the cold loft was deserted as you laid in the middle of your bed, beads of sweat ran down your sore skin and your breathing was coming out harder than usual. you’d turned down the AC as soon as you’d woken up, the icy air doing very little to calm your raging hot skin. you had lived with derek and issac in the loft for 6 months after being turned by scott and having no where else to go; at first you thought of yourself as an inconvenience yet derek and issac constantly reassured you that you weren’t. al though they had said it many times, you still didn’t bother them with any of your problems and tried to keep to yourself in your room.

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Soft

It starts with a bar of soap.

For God’s sake, Kent thinks to himself in the “personal care” section of the grocery store. Why does Dove think I’m allergic to purple just because I’m a guy?

He picks up the lavender-scented bar soap and inhales. It smells heavenly. Next he tries the sandalwood-scented from the men’s section. It comes in a gray box and costs fifty cents less. It smells good but it reminds him of floor polish.

I’m a grown-ass man, Kent thinks, and buys the lavender soap.

The next time he’s out of body wash, he spends thirty minutes trying to decide on one of the many “manly” smells before caving to “Cocoa Cabana” in the women’s aisle because it smells like Valentines Day in a bottle. 

After that it’s his deodorant body spray, trading in “Bold” (whatever the fuck boldness smells like) for “Fresh Cotton.” 

The first time Jeff catches a whiff of it on him, he asks, “New fabric softener? It smells awesome.”

“Nah, switched deodorants.”

“Huh.” Jeff nods in approval. “Well, you smell like fresh blankets out of the dryer. I have a physical urge to hug you.”

Kent laughs. Jeff hugs him and he laughs more. It’s nice.

After five months, nearly every toiletry Kent owns has been switched over from an endless variety of blacks, grays, and occasional dark greens and blues to white, purple, soft brown, yellow, and pink. Showers have transformed from a perfunctory necessity to something luxurious. Women’s products are so indulgent. They make Kent feel and smell like he’s been at a spa. He does have to learn to juggle the fragrances appropriately or risk smelling like a perfume store vomited on him. But it’s worth it, for how good he feels after. He feels pampered. His skin is softer, his hair shines, and even his pits and crotch look and feel cleaner. He doesn’t know if it’s the products or because he really cares about the maintenance, now, since he’s got all these specialty items to try. It doesn’t matter. He feels great.

Kent now has honest-to-God bubble baths and detox-salt-soaks. He’s got body butters and face masks and a lip balm in almost every flavor. The ladies at the Lush at the mall know him by name.

Kent’s still single. He’s got his cat for company, though, and the guys, who drop by or come over for movie and game nights and get drunk and eat all his food and pretend to chirp him for the specialty lemongrass-scented hand soap in his bathroom. Sometimes, on roadies, Swoops will plop down next to him on a bus or a plane and say loudly, “Damn, who’s got chocolate and isn’t sharing? Oh, it’s just Parser. Fuck you for getting my hopes up,” and then he’ll noogie Kent or grab his fingers and gnaw on them.

(The coaches have had to break them up before and it’s very unbecoming of two adult men.)

More than once, one of the guys has fallen asleep next to Kent and ended up face-first in Kent’s shoulder. They’ll wake up blearily, rubbing their eyes and saying, “Whoops, sorry man, didn’t mean to drool on you.” Kent was confused at first but he’s realizing that it’s because they gravitate towards the scent of him in their sleep. He smells like comforting things: honey and chocolate and cotton and Shea. He smells like warmth and safety. It’s why he likes all the things he buys, so it makes sense the guys would like that, too.

Nobody rags on him for it. They chirp him, but that’s different. Chirping, light-hearted and giggly, means acceptance. Soon his teammates start coming up to him in the locker room or nudging him on a bus and saying, “Parser, can I borrow some of your stuff?” and leaving with key-lime lips or cocoa-butter hands.

But it’s when he catches Sunny—big, burly, greatly-bearded d-man Sunny—pulling a bright orange tube of passion fruit lip balm out of his bag and slicking it on in front of everyone that he knows for sure that it’s okay.

Here Are My Colors

Anthony Ramos x Reader

Requested: anthony x reader where reader is anthony’s longterm girlfriend who stuck with him through him never being home, missing out on date nights for rehearsals & performances, & really through everything together. when the show hits broadway, anthony starts staying waaay later than he has to @ the theatre & on readers 3 year anni with him, he insists he has to stay late at the theatre when they already had plans together & reader discovers it was just bc he wanted to hang out with jasmine

Words: 6,149 (i get it man, I’m so extra)

Warnings:  swearing, cheating, AND angst, SO much angst, I’m sorry

A/N: I WANT TO DEDICATE THIS FIC TO THE MOST AMAZING PERSON, ELL @lookaroundlookaroundhowlucky. THANK YOU FOR LOOKING OVER THIS & FOR LITERALLY MAKING ME LAUGH & SMILE EVERY SINGLE FUCKING DAY. I LOVE YOU & I APPRECIATE THE SHIT OUTTA YA GIRL. Y’ALL GO CHECK HER OUT, SHE SLAYS THE GAME EVERYDAY.

ALSO, I have no words as to how PROUD I am of this fic, it’s UNREAL. It took me so long to write and I love it, it’s basically my child. PLEASE ENJOY.

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flyingchancla  asked:

You know what I love more about Jin and the pink crocs? He has thingies on them, I can't what kind of additions he put there, I remember my eldest had these cars things on his crocs when he was younger. Oh man.

Oh my god friend, I didn’t even NOTICE THIS.  OF COURSE JIN WOULD HAVE EXTRA SPECIAL CUSTOMIZED PINK CROCKS OF FUCKING COURSE HE WOULD I”M GHGHGHHHGHH

HE IS THE CUTEST.  

Front Row Seat

Jenna knew the Samwell men’s hockey team.

Of course she did. Everyone did. But she especially did because she was on the Samwell women’s hockey team.

She knew it wasn’t a phenomenon exclusive to the Samwell Women’s Hockey Team – the lack of recognition for female athletics. But the men’s hockey team were so especially over the top, most of Jenna’s classmates didn’t even know Samwell had a women’s hockey team.

Jenna knew it wasn’t the team’s fault. When Jack Zimmermann had been captain, he’d been really good about scheduling ice time and showing up to home games when he could for support. The two captains after, Ransom and Holster, invited the team to every kegster (they invited the entire school so that wasn’t that big of a gesture but it was still nice to be recognized as a team), And Eric Bittle, the most precious bean Jenna had ever met, still sends them a couple pies every time they win a game.

They were good and kind dudes.

But they were absolutely ridiculous.

Jenna didn’t have to know the men’s hockey team to know William Poindexter and Derek Nurse.

“I’m just saying! How else do you explain an image without written alphabet conveying a singular message to tens of thousands of people?”

“Nurse, you’re not going to convince me memes are their own language, okay? You’re just not.”

“Where’s your sense of curiosity, Poindexter? Where’s your finesse?”

“I don’t know, where’s your chill, Nurse?”

Jenna bit her lip to keep from laughing. She didn’t need to turn around to see the scandalized look on Derek Nurse’s face.

It would have been so easy to resent SMH. They got all the glory, they got all the girls, and Jenna’s team worked just as hard as they did.

Instead, Jenna decided it would be healthier for her and more fun to instead choose to enjoy their antics. Especially since she had a front row seat to the world’s saltiest D-men.

Or, more of a third row seat. The row right in front of the row Nursey and Dex sat in, every Monday, Wednesday, and Friday in Pop Culture Theory.

Every day a new adventure.

“I honestly can’t believe this.”

“Let it go Poindexter.”

“To hell with that, I need to bask in this.”

“Nothing to bask about, asshole, it’s not a big deal.”

“Not a big deal? Nursey, you have never read The Lord of the Rings. And I have! This is unprecedented.”

“Nice five dollar word there, book boy.”

“Oh, get fucked, Derek.”



“I’ll kill you, Nurse.”

“I don’t think you will. I do not think you’ll do that. Because you love me.”

“The Lord is testing me.”

“Will, what does that mean? Are you calling me the Lord? That is kind of you.”

“One more haiku, Nurse, I swear to God.”

“What is this I hear? Using the Lord’s name in vain? You bad Cath’lic boy.”

Nurse.

“I’m not saying you’re sexist if you can’t acknowledge that Jessica Jones is marvel’s best long form origin story, but why, William, do you hate women?”

“I can’t believe you, of all people, are arguing with me about this. How could you not agree with me that Luke Cage is the best?”

“Oh, what, because I’m part black?”

“Yes, as a matter of fact, and that’s not racist! That’s me acknowledging all that shit you’ve ever said about privilege and cultural oppression and recognizing the representation of that through Luke Cage . The show is literally about a black man the police can’t gun down! You don’t appreciate that?”

“Oh I can definitely appreciate that. That message is dope! And I think you’re mad woke for your active listening. But, just, in narrative framing and character arcs and visual story-telling, Jessica Jones is leagues a-fucking-bove. Also her character is a nice subversion of traditional leading lady portrayals.”

“Yeah, no, she’s a badass.”

“For real. And at least we can agree they’re both better than fucking Iron Fist.”

“Yeah, no, fuck that guy.”

“Heard.”

Jenna’s favorite, though, happened on one of the last Wednesday classes before finals.

They weren’t already talking when they came in to take their usual seats. That wasn’t weird, they didn’t talk a lot of mornings. Jenna knew from word of mouth that their friendship was tenuous on the best of days so it made sense for them to keep quiet on some days.

No, the funny part – the amazing part – was after a good ten minutes of silence, thirty seconds before class was slated to begin, Jenna heard Nurse turn in his desk and casually ask, in a bored voice, apropos of nothing , “So you want a blowjob after this?”

Jenna tried not to choke. She could not laugh. She could not let them know she listened in on them every Monday, Wednesday, and Friday,

But Poindexter just paused and then sighed really dramatically before saying “Yes.” As if Nursey was really putting him out by offering him a blowjob.

Jenna absolutely needed to excuse herself she was so in danger of laughing herself into a coma but just then class began so she had to quietly have a heart attack for the next 40 minutes.

Jenna was the only woman on her team completely unsurprised to see the D-Men making out against a wall at the next kegster.

September Fic List (2017)

Baby, I’m Right Here by @suddenclarityharry  (FallingLikeThis) (8k)  

Harry and Louis are best friends who live on different continents and may or may not be in love with each other. 

Back to Solid Ground by stylesoftheshire (2k)

Louis has saved Harry’s life three times.

Black and Blue by alison (19k)

Louis is a barista who is a bit damaged from a previous relationship. Harry is a musician who is all warmth and light. Rebuilding a life takes time.

But There’s One I Always Miss by @cupcakentea (cupcakentea) (7k)

Harry is the cure to Louis’s insomnia

Building Castles In The Sky by @thesexyasswoman  (SexyAssWoman) (22k)

Louis had a four year old with a stuttering problem. Harry was always there to help.

Cling To Me by Snowy38 (12k)

Harry is a hybrid who needs company and a place to stay while Niall goes on a trip.

Flying With Broken Wings by Snowy38 (35k)

“I’m a ballet dancer,” he offers. “In my last year of ballet school.”

Louis leans up to fetch his coffee, taking a sip and wincing. His voice is huskier when he speaks again.

“Fuck, that sounds like hard work.”

Harry nods.

“It is.”

For the Love of Honey by @londonfoginacup (LadyLondonderry) (2k)

 Louis looks like he’s going to topple over, arms filled with planks and mesh.

 “What’s this for?” Liam asks, rushing to take the weight away before Louis hurts himself.

 “The bees, Liam!” Louis motions vaguely around himself to where there are definitely no bees.

 Liam frowns. His large fuzzy eyebrows (good landing spots for bees) furrowing. “There are no bees here, Louis.”

 “Not yet, there’s not.”

If the Surface Begs You Home by @becomeawendybird (QuickedWeen) (17k)

Louis is the darling of the small neighbouring seaside village who came home after university to take over their local library, and can’t seem to stay away from the mysterious pregnant mermaid his friends introduce him to.

In All Its Imperfections by (BriaMaria) (15k) @briannamarguerite

“Oh. My. Fucking. God,” Harry whispered, his eyes darting over the sentences again willing them not to make sense. They did, they did make sense. “Oh. My. Bloody. Fucking. God.”

The next thing he knew he was on the floor, staring at the ceiling, with a very concerned Liam hovering over his head.

“What happened, mate?” Liam asked.

Harry just pointed to his computer.

Liam bent over Harry’s desk to read the email. “What? This isn’t bad. Is that your to-do list? Did you finally come up with the inside text for those cards?”

“Leeyum" he groaned. “It’s what’s on the list.”

“Oh,” Liam paused for a beat. “Is it dirty stuff?”

Harry nodded.

There was more silence. And then, “Dirty stuff with Louis?”

In This Moment by @dimpled-halo (dimpled_halo) (11k)

A mix-up at the hospital causes Louis to reevaluate his life and he works on trying to fix his biggest mistake:  letting Harry Styles walk out of his life two years ago.

Life Was a Song, You Came Along by @rainbowninja  (rainbowninja167) (37k)

Louis is a songwriter trapped in a lie that could ruin his best friend’s career. Harry owns a record store, distrusts everyone in the music industry on principle, but loves Niall Horan’s newest album. A modern retelling of Singin’ in the Rain.

Never Walk Away (A Man Can Be Kind) by @loveislarryislove (LiveLaughLoveLarry) (8k)

Louis and Harry have recently ended their three year relationship. But maybe a little holiday magic can bring them back together.

No Simple in Loving You by alison (21k)

Louis gets a job as a bartender where he meets Harry.

Sometimes love isn’t enough. But sometimes it’s everything.

Olivia by @haloeverlasting  (haloeverlasting) (7k)

Harry has a cat. Louis thinks he has a secret husband. It’s as ridiculous as it sounds.

Running Wild by @phd-mama (phdmama) (2k)

Harry never knows what’s going to happen with Louis, even after all their years of marriage.

Save your loving arms for a rainy day by @briannamarguerite (BriaMaria) (18k)

The one where Louis is a pop star who has lost his voice and Harry helps him find it.

taking tips and getting stoned by alison (24k)

Louis drives a taxi. He hasn’t seen Harry in eight years when they have a chance meeting.

A lot has changed in that time. But not everything.

That’s How I Know by @allwaswell16 (allwaswell16) (17k)

The one where Harry’s African grey parrot spills his dirty secrets to his very hot neighbor.

the beginning of everything by @louehvolution ( thedeathchamber) (30k)

A Belle Époque AU set (mostly) in Paris in which Harry is a struggling artist, in more ways than one, and Louis is a successful theatre critic and a failed writer, more or less.

The World Still Turns by @hrrytomlinson (hrrytomlinson) (21k)

Harry and Louis have known each other since they were tiny little boys, both wildly obsessed with airplanes, space, and the stars. More than twenty years later, Harry plans to propose to Louis, but when he wakes up, Louis is gone.

The Years Haven’t Changed You by stylesoftheshire (8k)  

Set four years after the band has split up and, co-incidentally, four years after Harry and Louis split up.
They meet in Sainsbury’s.              

We’ll Be Seamless by @dinosaursmate  (waytoomanypeopleintheaddisonlee (dinosaursmate)) (52k)

Louis spends all his spare time scrolling arty nude blogs on Tumblr but amongst them all, Green is his favourite.

HiddleHamlet: A firsthand account (part I)

Okay guys. Here goes. I’m going to try to remember and describe as much of the experience as possible, so you can all feel a little piece of it too. This is your warning… this is going to be a long post.

Disclaimer: this review is going to be very little about the play, and very lots about how mindblowingly gorgeous and excellent Tom was in the play. If you’re not in this to hear a dissertation on that man’s thighs in his tight-ass jeans, don’t read further. I love and deeply appreciate theatre (this is the 14th play I’ve seen since moving to London 10 months ago), but this is tumblr and I’m not really here to be a theatre critic or to dissect various interpretations of Shakespeare. I’m here to drool over sexy men. It’s right there in the title.

So, to get that boring, non-thigh-centred discussion out of the way first - the play was seriously great. I enjoyed it hugely, even apart from the magic of Tom’s Hamlet (and somehow in spite of the distraction that was my brain screaming “HE’S RIGHT THERE!!!” for 3 hours straight). I saw a similarly intimate staging of Hamlet back in January, which I found… overly intense. This one was much better. I especially liked the touches of humour throughout, which helped to break up the heavier moments and moved the story along in a nice rhythm, and brought out the humanity and likability of the characters. The cast were all fantastic, and the sparseness of the stage worked well - the focus was fully on the actors and the words they were saying. 

We were sat in the front row, far stage left…which was basically on the stage. The theatre is teeny, with no raised stage, which meant the actors were walking by us close enough to touch. Being that close to Tom for an extended period of time was full-on exhilarating. When he’d run by us, we’d get a waft of air and could actually smell him. I didn’t get to last time, so I breathed in deep this time…and it was absolutely delicious. I’m sure we were visibly swooning after each inhale.

(I’m really sad that only a limited number of people will get to see this, and I know there’s been much discussion over the supposed “exclusivity” of this show, but I must say, in being one of the lucky ones who got to be there, that it was magical how intimate this was. It was immersive - a unique and beautiful theatre experience. I feel incredibly grateful.) 

Important things must be addressed, so: couch humping. Was SO FUNNY. It wasn’t a full-on dry humping (oh god…I just had to take several minutes to think about what that would be like. I’m back now) but rather a couple of energetic thrusts. Which was enough. This was met with laughter and tons of quietly imploding vaginas, I assume.

In this same scene (a great scene), Hamlet sits on the recently-violated couch with Polonius and laughs loudly with him. It’s rather forced (he’s putting on a show here), but also - seriously adorable. Because Tom. It gifted us with a huge Hiddles grin, which is so damn infectious (as you well know). In the third bout of this laughter, Hamlet dissolves into tears. One of the best things about Tom’s Hamlet was how perfectly and naturally he navigated the quick shifts in his mood - swinging wildly between grief, rage, lunacy, amusement, earnestness - and it all felt incredibly deft and real. Also, that man is gifted when it comes to crying. I think there were real tears in his eyes for about 75% of the performance. At one point, you could see the tears falling, illuminated by the stage lights. It was beautiful. I managed to stay seated and not run to throw myself on him and cover him in kisses, which was obviously what first instinct was telling me to do.

Okay…let us talk about how good he looked. IT IS GROSS, AND MAKES NO SENSE. My brain can’t compute this level of attractiveness, and I have no appropriate words to convey it. It’s even worse in real life. And truly, this is Peak Tom, look-wise. I missed probably large sections of dialogue due to thinking about his hair (I wish this was a joke). I could not stop staring at it. The curls are entrancing. It is perfection. I will cry when he gets a haircut. THIS IS THE HAIR HE WAS BORN TO HAVE. Also, THE JEANS. Holy fucking hell. I could write a Hamlet-length soliloquy about those jeans. Maybe it was because I was on the side, so I spent a good amount of time looking at the back of him, but…I have never appreciated a view more. Those jeans were, um, very tight, and I have zero complaints. I think I could actually see his thigh muscles flexing through them. I was equally entranced by his legs and thighs throughout the whole thing. My stream of consciousness went something like this: hair-legs-thighs-jaw-eyes-voice-words-legs-ass-kill-me-now…!

Yeah… his ass in those jeans. Specifically when he was moving or jumping around a lot. I leave it to your imagination.

Overall, there is truly just something about him. We have not been imagining that. His physical presence is undeniably, overwhelmingly attractive. He’s all legs and cheekbones and curls, and the way he moves is impossible to look away from. He’s so damn FIT. His body, his face, his every movement…it’s all just sex incarnate. I can’t be eloquent about it. What the fuck do you say about this. Just. Ugh. Fuck me up.

Originally posted by thehumming6ird

Will you look at this? GOD.

Wardrobe stuff: I love his new peacoat. It’s really nice and looks so soft, so he looks super huggable in it. I will continue to swoon over the upturned collar look on him - it works so well with his long neck and impeccable jawline. I also like how well he rocks the hoodie-and-peacoat combo. Really, is there anything that doesn’t look good on him?! Oh, and…there was no appearance, sadly, of the beloved grey boots (those boots are like a secondary celeb spotting for us by now). He was wearing dark brown boots through the whole thing. But they looked really good too no duh, so, no big loss.

Uh-oh… this post is already very long, and I have at least 26 more things to say about all of this. I’m think I’m gonna stop here for tonight and write a part two tomorrow. Coming up: tummy peeks, dancing, leather gloves and the opinions of the lady sitting next to me on Tom’s ass in those jeans (you didn’t think I was done talking about that yet, did you?)

Originally posted by fromhiddleswithlove

anonymous asked:

Dan's new live video @ 5:01, there's definitely some hair straighteners on the floor

i have a few things to say, but i’ll start from left to right. 

a) i loved his face when someone pointed out the candle on the other night table, idk he was just so taken aback. like “… oh yeah! single candle… the bedroom candle…” 

b) i love the bed, it’s so pretty. everything just looks neat? besides from the bloody awful curtains; the moon mirror, the frame of the bed, it’s all lovely. 

c) what is that black box my dude. is that the new box of secrets? what is that about.

d) why does he have the stupid rockband drum set in the bedroom, i thought the consoles were upstairs? no, Hold the fuck up, the DRUMSET used to be upstairs!! I’M SURE OF IT. have u guys put a tv in the bedroom and carried all the consoles downstairs so you could play lying on the bed? that’s peak lazyness, i’m so disappointed in you both. 

e) ah yes, the dryson hairdryer. that shit is full 200 pounds. they have the hair dryer and two dryson fans, this is rich commodity in its finest. i wonder if they have the hoover as well, that one looks amazing and everyone says it’s actually totally worth the thousand dollars. 

f) the straighteners and the concept of this being proof. i think that at this point, it’s just funny to me that it’s a topic we have to talk about, the straighteners were on the floor last time he did a liveshow in the room and i thought that was it, right? i feel like people just forget things happen and/or act as if we don’t know they share a bedroom! i mean, do as you please, but i’d like skip ahead into the part where we accept it’s a thing and we let this be the normal, status quo, this is what it is you know? still lovely to be reminded that they do though, i get ya.

g) what is the white thing hanging from that awful curtain, what is it. i need answers.

h) in what fucking moment did both of them hoard so many pairs of shoes. i swear to god, all dan wears is those ones with the zips and phil wears the blue ones and that’s about it. but im counting here over 20 pairs of shoes, and they even want us to believe that they’re owned by just dan? try me again, what the hell is this, they need to start giving to charity, there is NO WAY they find use to over 20 pair of shoes, you do not need that many, specially when you spend most of your life at home wearing socks.

i) it’s funny that even though the mess that was the last time he did a liveshow in his room, with phil’s damage control and all, the mirror is still there, like whatever my dude. cool white mirror dan. 

i think that’s all, thanks for reading if u made it this far. 

🎶🎶When You Collect Records🎶🎶
  • Hipster: *moves dusty old boxes out of the way* Whoa, an old record player. It looks like it's in working order too! *runs outside*
  • Hipster: Yo, dad!
  • Dad: What?
  • Hipster: We're getting rid of all of poppop's stuff, right?
  • Dad: There's something you want, isn't there?
  • Hipster: There's this old stereo record player in the attic.
  • Dad: What do you need a record player for?
  • Hipster: My record collection.
  • Dad: I didn't even know they still made those things. Can't you just listen to music on your phone?
  • Hipster: Dad, there's a big difference between listening to music digitally and on record.
  • Dad: Fine, I don't wanna get into it with you right now. You can take the record player. You just have to get someone else to take it to your place for you. My truck's full.
  • Hipster: Thanks dad! *smooches dad on the cheek*
  • *later at hipster's apartment*
  • Friend: So, like Patch Adams ends with Patch Adams half-naked in front of a ton of people. I don't know if it was meant to be funny or like a weird sex thing, but like the movie was just a deeply disturbing character study. I can't stop thinking about it.
  • Hipster: That sounds boring. *unlocks door to apartment* Ta-da! Here it is! My new record player!
  • Friend: New? Looks fucking old to me, dude.
  • Hipster: Well, it is old. That's the appeal. And we're going to listen to the new Sufjan record on it.
  • Friend: Is that actually how you say Sufjan? Apparently, I've been pronouncing it wrong this whole time.
  • Hipster: Well, you won't after this record. There's an entire track where he just says his name for four minutes. It's amazing. *plays records*
  • Record Player: *coughs* Hello. Hello! Where am I? Doctor? Hello! Why is it so dark...............................Can I breathe? I can't breath. Oh god, I'm not breathing! Oh god, oh god, oh god, oh god, oh god! I.....................................
  • Hipster: Uh, that's not Sufjan.
  • Friend: It totally isn't. Is it some guest vocalist? I like the new direction he's going in. No instruments or singing, and long stretches of silence. Very experimental.
  • Hipster: *stops record player* I think maybe we should do something else for now.
  • Friend: Fucking lame! I wanted to listen to more Sufjan.
  • *days later at the record store*
  • Hipster: Yo, I think the Sufjan Stevens record I bought from here might be some kind of mispress.
  • Store Clerk: Really? It's a pretty major album. I doubt there'd just be a mispress like that.
  • Hipster: Yeah, but listen to it. It's not Sufjan at all. It's some girl talking.
  • *hipster and clerk listen to a completely normal Sufjan Stevens album together*
  • Store Clerk: What are you talking about? This is definitely Sufjan Stevens.
  • Hipster: Okay, but it wasn't like that when I listened to it at home! I even listened to it with my friend and he heard the same thing!
  • Store Clerk: Maybe there's something wrong with your record player.
  • Hipster: Hmm, maybe there is.
  • *back at the apartment*
  • Hipster: *turns on record player and just listens*
  • Record Player: ...I'm awake again. Why did I black out? Did I even black out? God, I'm not breathing, but it doesn't matter. Why don't I need to breathe? Am I even alive?
  • Hipster: Can you hear me?
  • Record Player: Doctor. Doctor! DOCTOR! Why can't I move? Why can't I feel anything. Keep yourself together. It'll all make sense soon. Calm down. Just breathe deeply. Fuck, I can't breathe! AIIIIIIIIIIIIIIEEEEEEEEEEEEE! I CAN'T BREATHE! DOCTOR! DOCTOR! DOCTOR! HELP! HELP ME, PLEASE! I'M STUCK! I CAN'T MOVE! PLEASE HELP ME!
  • Hipster: *turns off record player* It's just a recording, I bet. I can't believe I talked to it like an idiot... *nervously turns record player back on*
  • Record Player: I blacked out again. I blacked out. For how long? Is there even time here? Hell. This is hell, right? Did I go to hell.........................................
  • Hipster: *listens to the record player for hours*
  • Record Player: Negative 6893 bottles of wine on the wall! Negative 6893 bottles of wine! Take one down, pass it around, Negative 6894 bottles of wine on the wall... fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck! PLEASE SOMEONE HELP ME! AIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!
  • Hipster: *keeps listening*
  • Record Player: Soul of Christ, make me holy, Body of Christ, be my salvation. God, please forgive me. I'm sorry for all of my sins. Please free me. I'm so sorry. Please. Please. Please.
  • Hipster: *still listening*
  • Record Player: FUCK YOU! FUCK YOU! SHITTY DOCTOR! FUCK YOU! LET ME OUT! LET ME OUT! *sobs intensely* FUCK YOU! FUCK YOU! FUCK EVERYTHING! Please just let me go.
  • Hipster: *nervously walks up to record player and lightly taps on it*
  • Record Player: ...A knock. A KNOCK! PLEASE HELP ME! I'M STUCK! PLEASE! *record player begins shake violently*
  • Hipster: *backs away in fear*
  • Record Player: HELP! HELP! HELP ME! PLEASE, IF SOMEONE'S THERE, HELP ME! HELP ME! I'M STUCK! GET ME OUT OF HERE, PLEASE!
  • Hipster: *unplugs record player*
  • Hipster: *gets hammer from the closet and begins to break apart record player*
  • Record Player: *drips red*
  • Hipster: W-What? *cracks front of record player open*
  • *rotting viscera falls from the record player*
  • Hipster: O-Oh... *stuffs viscera back into the record player and duct tapes over it*
  • Hipster: *turns record player back on*
  • Record Player: ...I can feel. It hurts. Why does it hurt now? Why does it hurt? Why? Why? Why? WHY!? WHY!? WHY!? *spurts blood through it speakers and begins to gurgle*
  • Record Player: *hops forward* Please just let me go. Please... please. I'll do anything. I just want to see you again. I'm so sorry. This isn't what I asked for. I'm so sorry. *hops forward again and comes unplugged*
  • Record Player: *tips over, bleeding heavily onto the carpet*
  • Hipster: *silently cleans up the mess*
  • *some time later*
  • Hipster: *calls dad* Hey, dad. Oh, nothing. Uh, I just need to borrow your truck, If not tonight sometime this week. I just need to get rid of something. No, no, that's fine, I can do it myself. Yeah, tomorrow morning is perfect. Thanks Love you too. Bye.
  • *the next afternoon*
  • Dad: So, what did you need to get rid of this morning?
  • Hipster: Nothing important. Just some old junk... Dad, what kind of person was poppop?
  • Dad: Well, he was only the greatest man I've known in my life. Really caring, dedicated to his family. When you were born he loved you so much. He was a bit of a loner, though. It took a lot to get him to open up. Even around me and your grandmother. He was a bit like you. Always a huge music lover.
  • Hipster: I see. Was he ever a doctor?
  • Dad: That's a weird thing to ask. Nope. He hated doctors. Didn't trust modern medicine one bit. It's ironic. His cancer probably wouldn't have gotten to him if he did. But, your poppop was always so stubborn.
  • Hipster: Oh, okay then.
  • *some days later*
  • Friend: New carpet?
  • Hipster: Yup, old one was ugly wasn't it. It was time for a change.
  • Friend: That's what I've been telling you! I'm glad you finally came to your senses. What happened to your record player, though?
  • Hipster: That thing? I threw it away. It was busted.
  • Friend: That sucks. Are you gonna buy a new one?
  • Hipster: No.
  • Friend: But you won't have anything to play your records on.
  • Hipster: Yeah, but I buy records because I want to support the artists. They're not really for listening. Besides, lossless is better. FLAC is the future.

anonymous asked:

Do you know any fics where Yuri unintentionally breaks Victor’s heart. I'm a sucker for angst with a happy ending. Thank you ^^

DO YOU GUYS LIKE TO SEE ME IN PAIN?!??! I’m just kidding! Thank you for these requests! Here are some fics where Victor cries… *goes into a corner and cries for 10 years*

Originally posted by takemetovikturi


Victor Cries


selfish by MissSpock, Gen, 1.9k
“…Aren’t you going to stop me?” He hated how his voice wobbled and cracked, and he had to fight to keep the tears in his eyes.
Yuuri’s brows creased. The mist had cleared from the lenses of his glasses and he looked at Victor with confused, amber eyes. “Why should I? It seems as though you’ve come to a decision.” Role reversal of ep 11. *sobs*

twenty-eight by pageleaf, Gen, 864 words
“…I’m sorry, Yuuri.” Yuuri blinks. “For what?” “I disappointed you.” Viktor’s voice is hoarse. “I didn’t win.” I LOVE THIS FIC SO MUCH

I’m Always Here by queeravocado, Teen, 1.6k
It’s 3 AM. Yuuri’s reliving one of his most horrifying events in his life: the GPF before he met Victor. Victor’s a complete ass, and becomes his number one fear. Turns out it’s a dream, but Victor’s crying his eyes out after what he saw. Victor cries. It’s sad. Happy ending, though!

Talk by future_fishy, Gen, 1.2k
Viktor wasn’t himself today. Yuuri is the best at comforting Victor. Love!

kiss & cry by lostincostco, Explicit, 2.7k
“Oh,” Yuuri says wonderingly. “You’re crying.” Yuuri makes Victor cry, but not in the way you’re thinking…!!!! (this isn’t even sad, it’s just smut.. doN’T JUDGE ME IT’S GOOD OKAY?!)

Stupid Thoughts by future_fishy, Gen, 1.5k
“I’m fine, Yuuri, go back to sleep.” Still that smile. “You’re not, and I won’t.” Yuuri’s serious tone made Viktor flinch, “Please don’t lie to me.” Victor is self conscious about his future with Yuuri????? I’m sobbing?????

Where we belong by ss_blackrabbit, Teen, 1.5k
It’s true that Yuuri wanted to be hated as the man who took Viktor away from the world, but he never meant to take Viktor’s world away from him. Another ep 11 fic! Happy ending.

Comfort by future_fishy, Gen, 697 words
Viktor is upset, and Yuuri isn’t sure how to comfort him, but he tries. I’m totally not crying… *sobs*

A Melancholy Of White by mochary, Teen, 15k
“Yuuko. What’s happening?” Viktor asks sternly. “Did something happen?” “O-oh my God. Viktor-“ Yuuko cries from the other line. “It’s Y-Yuuri. He got into an accident. Viktor, t-there’s blood. P-please come immediately.” It’s then, when Viktor’s heart shatters into a million pieces. ONLY READ THIS IF YOU WANT TO BE KILLED. SERIOUSLY. MY HEART BROKE INTO FIFTY BILLION PIECES WHEN I READ THIS AND I STILL HAVEN’T RECOVERED. Really well written, though, and a happy ending!

Worthwhile by surveycorpsjean, Explicit, 6.2k
In which, it’s Victor that breaks.
So beautifully written. One of, if not my favourite, YOI anxiety/mental illness fic. Highly recommend. So f-ing sad, though.

Holding on for Dear Life by icterine, Teen, 2.4k
It turns out that sometimes heartbreak happens in seconds, unexpectedly – and once it does, there’s no dulling of the senses. Victor’s heart shatters.

Reward.

Bucky Barnes/Reader/Matt Murdock.

Warnings: SMUT.  Threesome, porn without plot, terrible writting, double penetration, oral sex (fr), unprotected sex (this is fantasy, we’re all adults. Remember that safe sex is the best sex), dirty talk, excessive use of endearments. Me being a shameless thirsty hoe.

Word Count: 3866.

Rating: 18+

Masterlist

This came up thanks to @asirenscalling because, while I was rewatching Daredevil, we started to talk about this scenario, so thank her for this.

Also @sexylibrarian1 said she needed it and @thecrownedrose because she’s amazing and we like to spoil each other. 

Keep reading

So I’ve been thinking about the idea of Blue mirroring Lance in terms of hidden insecurity, and while I cannot for the life of me remember where I saw it, I saw someone on tumblr post “everyone thinks of Blue as the low standards Lion” in reference to her bio painting her as the most accepting.

And I think about that, and… what that means.

Because Blue just as much as all of the other Lions is shown to hold out for her designated paladin. She doesn’t grab Keith any of the numerous times he was there and she could’ve gone home immediately. And considering Blue is Lance’s Lion- that wasn’t a small temptation. If she’s specifically good at working with people who aren’t ideal paladin matches, if she can get along with just about anyone- every time Keith went to that cave Blue would have that temptation.

Keep reading

Jelly Beans

Summary: A cute little Chris Evans x Reader where you have just one thing missing, and you attempt to make it fall into place to create a picture-perfect life. Who knew having kids with the love of your life would be so perfect?
Warnings: light smut (unprotected sex), lots of fluffiness
Word count: 1165
A/N: I would complain about this whole thing popping into my head during the time where I should be studying but I’d never say no to a cute fluffy fic. This was inspired by one of @emilyevanston​‘s adorable headcanons!

Originally posted by nerdofallfandoms


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Shit said in my Discord group

“While you fight I’m just gonna be making my ramen”
“pest control guy is ur new pokemon”
"this kingler is not accepting my balls”
“I just love seeing how you guys can embarrass yourselves over this”
“Don’t take that out of context”
“Fite me I will make you short”
“Oh hey dude how is it going my shipping troll homeslice breadslice shipslice”
“i came platonically into this room to have a platonic good time and honestly i feel so attacked in a non sexual way”
“Who is better waifu: ____ or _____? I’m asking because I’m caught in the middle of an argument about the topic, and I don’t wanna settle it right away due to the fact that I wouldn’t even hesitate to say ____”
“MY FRIEND TEXTED ME AT FUCKING 2AM! IM GONNA GET BACK AT HIM! IVE READ UP ON PETTY REVENGE I GOT THIS!”
“Sleep so you can blep”
“as apparently i am double satan, i approve of not fucking no”
“I thought this was about the soda for a second”
“You pulled that out of your donkey. The other word for donkey. That begins with an A. And ends with an s.”
“We’re down one furry… This is gonna be hard”
“Do I have to nickshame?”
“I care about chieves because I’m a chiev hoe!”
“Don’t do school, stay in vegetables and eat your drugs.”
"And the Lord did say: eat a bag of dicks”
“Jesus layed a hand on the tax collectors and proclaimed, "Eat my Diction.”
“I platonically think you’re platonically wrong platonically”
“And then there’s kermit.”
“We chill. We chill. We chill. We good. We good? Alright lets go.”
“___ God dammit put your dick away”
“It’s just a prank! It’s just a prank! It’s just a social experiment! A social experiment gone wrong! GONE WRONG!”
“You will not crush me like a bug, I will crush you like a bug for the tenth time gosh dangit!”
“Hey! Leave me be! I’m only slaughtering innocents! I’m not doing wrong!”
“My jackets on the floor, my ego is on it, and my back hurts.”
“Not only are they dying, but they’re dead.”
“By the power of my gigantic yaoi hands, I shall survive this night!”
“I question this group sometimes. And by sometimes I mean all the time.”
“I’m using my night time sexy voice”
“Now we can clean house on yo ass”
“welcome to the bitch house”
“shoot ____ first thats all im asking”
“you mother bitch”
“your dad has a minion kink”
“#Let_____BeThe6Foot3Baby”
“i think we are killing ___ mentally”
“You guys are to be honest. Great and stupid”
“clickty clack clickty clack with this chant I summon spam to the chat”
“You either die a DONG, or live long enough to become the DONGER”
“YOU’RE UNDER ARREST FOR BEING CASUAL. COME OUT WITH YOUR DONGERS RAISED”
“YOU STOLE THE PEEPO”
“a graceful death? you mean flying into the fucking sun”
“I am a howdere”
“did you just call me a tiny angry gremlin”
“the fuck type of kinky shit is happening”
“I think dying is bad for your heath, but I’m not to certain.”
“Guys help i need hardcore memes”
“So I wrapped my mom’s present today, and I’m looking at the wrapping paper, and it’s about as straight as ___; not at all.”
“Update: FRESHMAN FRIDAY People got jumped, thrown in trashcans and shit I however, am fine”
“slide back into sin mountain”
“Hold up ____ likes murder children Explains why she is bias towards me”
“I can’t offer ideas….so I’m just…gonna go back to stabbing at ice with a knife…”
“FUCKING STOP PAPPING BEFORE I FLIP MY SHIT”
“Someone take food and punch me in the gut so hard that it goes into my stomach”
“I see this green foot at the corner of my eye, and I think to myself “No he fucking didn’t-” And I look up and see Kermit the fucking frog holding a double barrel shotgun”
“Okay shut the fuck your mouth.”
“Death cannot come fast enough….In a platonic way, shut up ___”
“It’s not Google, it’s Wikipedia.”
“FUCK YOU! TECH SUPPORT BULLSHIT! FUCK!”
“Did you just curse at me in Mexicanese?”
“Being in band and playing the saxophone was always rough for dirty minded little me….i always had to practice my fingering and tonguing….”

"why don't you like frozen?"
  • what i mean: It's a film that, essentially suffers from an existential crisis throughout the entire two hours it runs. There's no world building whatsoever, leaving too many unanswered questions the audience in regards to the magic and lore of the land. It's inferred the trolls know everything there is to know about magic, but it does not explain how Elsa recieved her powers in the first place, leaving a pretty big unanswered question. Also, the decision to take a fantasy race usually isolated from magicks as the main sage magicians was an ...interesting choice, and would have worked out a bit better if the world was built up more. The plot is all over the place, with there being no clear antagonist until the final arc of the movie. Is the Duke of Weaselton supposed to be the antagonist? No, and he honestly doesn't even belong in the movie: in what way does this character move forward the plot? He doesn't, so why is he given such emphasis? Is Elsa supposed to be the antagonist? Through the film the audience is constantly being given conflicting views as to whether or not we are supposed to sympathsize with her or hate her, and we're never given our answer until the final arc of the movie, which is, ironically, when the real antagonist show his face: Hans. Since he is introduced as he antagonist in the final arc, it makes Hans' development as a villain feel rushed and unnatural. Such a sudden heel-face turn from charming benevolent prince to cold-blooded killer feels wrong, and considering there was no foreshadowing or dramatic irony leading up the reveal, it comes as a shock to even the most watchful moviegoers. Beyond the shock response, there is no reason for the audience to hate Hans, making him an ineffective villain all in all. The audience only hates him because he betrayed the trust that was willingly given in the first half of the film. Yes, he wants to usurp the throne and kill everyone off, but wouldn't that incentive be more effective if it were presented as such from the beginning of the movie? Give the viewers hints and clues that he is not what he seems, making the reveal of his plan much more suspenseful. Additionally, if it were addressed from the beginning, a large amount of the aimless plotless wandering that plagued most of the first three-quarters of the movie would be practically non-existant. In addition, the shock factor response wears off eventually; the impact of his betrayal means less and less to the audience each time they watch it. Part of the reason of the weakness and confusion in the beginning also stems from the fact that the movie is trying to juggle too many characters. Many named characters are completely unneeded and did not need to steal screentime (and by extension, valuble character development) from the main characters (Anna, Elsa, Kristoff, and I guess Hans). And the lack of character development is bad. Really bad. Anna doesn't feel like a real person, even by Disney standards. Elsa is a bit more believable, but her "development" is rushed and inferred instead of shown to the audience as it should be. Why was there such an emphasis on the parents in the beginning if they were only going to be killed off for plot fuel? And as an audience member, I did not feel any sadness for their death or for how Anna and Elsa were grieving. Having Elsa locked in her room for upmost of ten years was just...weird. There was absolutely nothing that justified it, making the isolation feel like a cheap way out for the writers to transition from childhood to adulthood. And beyond that, Arendelle is shown to be a peaceful kingdom, so it makes no sense that Anna would not be allowed to leave the castle and walk amongst the city. If magic exists in this world, why was Elsa locked away? Why was it a secret? All of these questions stem from weak worldbuilding that justifies very little of the events of the movie. There are so many unanswered questions that rise up from what happens inbetween childhood and adulthood. Is there a puppet monarch? Was magic seen as something negative or unknown? Why the trolls. Why the trolls. I'm sorry I just do not understand the trolls. The romantic subplot again ties into making the trolls feel even more forced and unneeded and the Hans reveal stale, I don't need to go into this. From a technically standpoint, the animation is subpar compared to its contempararies. Rise of the Guardians, a movie made a year before Frozen, had better ice effects. The particle effects and textures were nothing to write home about and the numerous clipping issues are clear evidence that the final product was rushed. The character design is the biggest complaint everyone has heard the most, but, Jesus Christ, oh my god it's bad. There's virtually no variation in character design. The facial structure of all the women are practically identical. Elsa, Anna, their mother, even Rapunzel all look 100% identical. Perhaps that wouldn't be such a problem if their body types were the same as well. There's no power of silouette in the film, something that is absolutely crucial to animated film, making Anna and Elsa blend together not only in the film, but in the industry itself. They do not stand out. They are blank and bland. The music is the only good thing, and that's only considering some songs. "Let it Go" and "First Time in Forever" are strong, powerhouse showtunes that actually move the plot forward, as songs in a musical should, but "Fixer-Upper" and "Love is an Open Door," while good, solid songs, do relatively nothing for the plot can could be omitted without sacrificing anything. "In Summer" is a total joke song that literally fades into nothing--I could not recall the tune if I tried, and "Do You Wanna Build a Snowman?" has a lot of potential but is, esentially, the same chorus repeated with little to no transition three times. It doesn't help that the song is also the most awkward contrived timeskip in the history of awkward contrived timeskips, again because it is never explained why Elsa is locked in her room at all. And the trolls and the--oh god. Please, all artists and writers, do NOT overlook the importance of worldbuilding. Even the dialogue is mediocre and does nothing to immerse the characters into the world around them. The resulting product is nothing but two hours of mediocrity masquerading as the best film of the decade in commercialization and ticket sales, but ultimately does nothing but leave a bad taste in the audience's mouth and will encourage Disney to continue making mediocre movies because they know they will sell and sell well.
  • what i say: because it's a bad movie