oh my god i still love you

6

Carrie Fisher was a gift humanity didn’t deserve

*whispers* guess whose favorite asshole just officially became a main character !!!!

8

Katy: So that one time you brought him in and he was sparking all over the place–

Keith: Yeah.

Katy: Oh. Oh my god

((right to left)) 

LISTEN THAT WAS A VERY GOOD POST

(submission by @amplyempathetic)

Avatar Aang is, in every sense of the word, my hero. 

It’s hard to explain in words, but Avatar Aang has been someone there for me since I was a kid. I could literally write an essay on the impact he’s had on me, both spiritually and mentally. I remember as a kid finally discovering Avatar and immediately falling in love with Aang – he was a kid, but he was a hero too, and he had a way of being both those things simultaneously without blurring the line in between. I was a small girl raised in a toxic Mormon household with a violent parent, so seeing Aang fight and use bending in a way that wasn’t considered destructive taught me that I could be strong and protect myself WITHOUT using anger or violence as a source. There are literally so many things I learned from Aang, not just about violence or emotion or anger, but also about spirituality and mental illness and just. Being human I guess? I don’t know, I just really like Avatar Aang.

✦  (  SERIAL   KILLER   SENTENCE   PROMPTS. 

 trigger heavy :  death, murder, blood, etc.  be cautious when reading and reblogging.                     please be sure and to change any of the pronouns if need be and / or as you see fit!   

in  the  killer’s  pov  : 

  • ❝  why are you screaming? i haven’t even cut on you yet?  ❞
  • ❝  oh, don’t you cry! i’ve killed a million times before.  ❞
  • ❝  i’m going to count to ten and when i’m finished, you’ll be dead.  ❞
  • ❝  scream all you want! no one will hear you down here!!  ❞
  • ❝  wooo! yeah! scream all you want! i’ll scream with you! mighty good time, yeah!  ❞
  • ❝  what’s the pointing in kidnapping if you aren’t going to do any killing?  ❞
  • ❝  i usually like to get to know my victims a little before i kill them.  ❞
  • ❝  every killer for himself, huh? it’s a dog eat dog world, huh?  ❞
  • ❝  you know what they say, once a killer, always a killer.  ❞
  • ❝  go on and run! run as fast as you can! i love a good chase!  ❞
  • ❝  you can run but you can’t hide! i’m going to find you and kill you!  ❞
  • ❝  see, i’ve stalked you for sometime before finally snatching you up!  ❞
  • ❝  i didn’t want to kill you whenever i brought you here but now, i have no choice!  ❞
  • ❝  you may think this is a one time thing but i promise, i will kill again.  ❞
  • ❝  come out, come out! wherever you are! you can’t hide from me forever!  ❞
  • ❝  there’s no turning back now! there’s no one coming for you, except for me!  ❞

in  the  victims  pov  : 

  • ❝  please! no! please!! don’t do this to me! please! ❞
  • ❝  why are you doing this to me? please! just let me go!  ❞
  • ❝  please, if you let me go, i won’t tell anybody about this! ❞
  • ❝  this is the part where things are switched up in your routines, victim kills the killer.  ❞
  • ❝  i told you already, i don’t why he/she/they let me go! he/she/they just did.  ❞
  • ❝  sometimes i can still see their face whenever i close my eyes.  ❞
  • ❝  why kill me? you can use me as ransom? my family loves me and has money!  ❞
  • ❝  oh, god, oh no!! please someone help me! HELP ME!  ❞
  • ❝  no, this isn’t real! NO, this isn’t happening to me! no, no, no, please.  ❞
  • ❝  oh, what’s the matter? surprised to see i made it out of your little death trap?  ❞
  • ❝  you’ll never get away with this! you hear me! you’ll never get away with it!  ❞
  • ❝  you’re sick! stop laughing! stop laughing, you sick son of a bitch!  ❞
  • ❝  when i get out of here, i’m going to run but i’ll be back for you, just wait. ❞
  • ❝  what — what are you doing? what are you going to do with that?  ❞
  • ❝  please, listen to me!! you have the wrong person!  ❞
  • ❝  oh god, you’re the killer everyone has been talking about! please, don’t hurt me! ❞

in  the  killer’s  lover  pov  :

  • ❝  long night? you’re covered in blood. ❞
  • ❝  i’ve missed you, though, i was still able to see you on the news.  ❞
  • ❝  wait, you went out and killed someone? without me? ❞
  • ❝  you’re hitting the news everywhere we go, we won’t be able to run forever. ❞
  • ❝  if you never let me a part of anything, why should i let you stay here?  ❞
  • ❝  as much as i enjoy you covered in blood, let’s get you cleaned up, in the shower. ❞
  • ❝  this is the third night in a row you come home covered in blood!  ❞
  • ❝  i’m just saying, maybe we should take some time off from killing..  ❞
  • ❝  i just don’t want you out so much with the police cracking down and all.  ❞
  • ❝  please, hurry back!! i’m afraid i might not ever seen you again when you leave.  ❞
  • ❝  you can’t keep killing, at least not without me around, to protect you.  ❞
  • ❝  if we keep doing this at this rate we’ll be as dead as our victims. ❞
  • ❝  wait!! i’m not leaving! are you crazy? this is my home!  ❞
  • ❝  help me lift him/them/her,  their/she/he’s heavy!!  
  • ❝  oh, brother, we really did a number on this one. i’m not cleaning it up.  ❞
  • ❝  you’re cleaning this one up, i cleaned up the last one.  ❞
  • ❝  here, finish her/him/them off, you look better doing it, i like to watch.  ❞

in  the  town / city’s  pov  :

  • ❝  can you believe it? there’s a killer roaming about and they have yet to catch ‘em. ❞
  • ❝  do you think that this killer is working all alone?  ❞
  • ❝  how hard is it to catch a killer? ❞
  • ❝  that killer on the loose made today’s news again.  ❞
  • ❝  haven’t you heard? the media just released a serial killer on the loose. ❞
  • ❝  i don’t want you out at night with this killer roaming around.  ❞
  • ❝  i can’t believe the media withheld information about that serial killer.  ❞
  • ❝  wait, you mean you don’t know? do you not watch the news?  ❞
  • ❝  what kind of serial killer doesn’t have a specific method when killing?  ❞
  • ❝  i can’t believe i’m living in a town / city where there is a serial killer loose.  ❞
  • ❝  if they don’t catch that killer soon, i’m packing up and moving. ❞
  • ❝  why are you so paranoid and scared all of a sudden? it’s just the police.  ❞
  • ❝  ever since this killer made news, you’ve been super paranoid.  ❞
  • ❝  did you hear? they think they may have finally caught that killer.  ❞
  • ❝  this killer is still killing people each day, how is this possible?  ❞
  • ❝  i still don’t understand why people take serial killer news the wrong way, as if it’s good.  ❞ 
pretty boy ☾ peter parker

summary : you think peter is very pretty, and your duty as his girlfriend is to tell him every chance you get.

wc : 1.4k 

  Peter Parker has freckles. They’re countless in amount and infinitesimal in size, but they’re spread across his sloped nose, his cheeks, and some of them are scattered across his shoulders from the days he spends at Rockaway Beach in the summertime sun not because he likes the beach, but because you do and you drag him there almost every day throughout July. He doesn’t mind. He can’t have you taking the train there alone, and he’d rather spend time with you in the sweltering heat than leave you by yourself. If you’re sitting close enough, the way you are right in this moment, you can count each one of those stars on his cheeks and play connect the dots with a ballpoint pen, if he’d let you. He most likely would. Peter would let you get away with anything. If you were to try to kiss each individual freckle that was settled there on his skin you’d be pressing your lips to his cheeks for hours on end. He’d like to see you try such a thing. 

   Peter Parker also has the sweetest brown eyes you’ve ever had the pleasure of gazing into. They were warm and kind and they felt like home whenever he turned them on you in that loving way he held. You love the way he looks at you, often and bright with happiness. You haven’t stopped looking at him since you started all those months ago, you couldn’t anticipate a time when you would. He doesn’t mind the permanent way his eyes settle on you, but it’s the way you’re always looking at him that makes him blush and turn his face away. He’s not much to look at, in his opinion. 

    He whines a little when he catches your eye again, trained on him like a reflex once again. His face glows a red the color of a ripe strawberry as he spins around in his chair and stares at the peeling cover of his science notebook. “What’s wrong, pretty boy?” You grinned when he flushed a deeper shade of crimson, still evading the smile that crept across your face. 

   “Y/N,” he whines once more, the heat creeping up toward the tips of his ears. He turns toward you, holding his cheek in his hand and keeping his elbow propped up on the swivel chair. “You know I get all,” he squirmed around in his chair, “flustered when you call me that.” The admittance came with a great reluctancy on his part, but it only made you smile more as you walked across the room and cleared away the clutter of his desk, taking a seat there so you could continue your study in Peter Parker. “I’m not pretty.” 

    “Shhh,” you chastised, using your foot to spin him back around. “You’re very pretty, Peter.” He stretches out his hand, waiting for you to grab it and hold it as careful as always. He presses a kiss to your knuckles whenever you hold his hand, he knows you think it’s the sweetest thing ever and that every single time he does it, you swoon like it’s your first date all over again. He’s big on holding hands. It’s intimate without being too much, and the teachers can’t really scold him for holding your hand the way they can for kissing you against the lockers when you both think no one is around. Still, he kisses your hand, and you close your eyes, smiling shyly. Then, you say, “How’d I get the sweetest, prettiest boy in the universe to be mine?” 

   “Oh, god,” he takes his hand out of yours and covers his cheeks with them, feeling the warmth of his skin against his palms and squeezing his eyes shut. He can’t believe what you’ve made him. A blushing mess undone the moment you call him pretty, sweet, yours. “Feel my cheek,” he demanded, grabbing your wrist and pressing your palm to his face. You laugh. 

   “You’re burning up, babe,” you say, patting his cheek. “I can’t help it. I have to compliment you. All the time. Every hour of every day.” You tap a finger against his cute nose. 

   “I would compliment you but every time I try you swoop in and render my speech incoherent with that little nickname you have for me,” he kept his fist against his cheek as he stared up at you, your legs dangling off his desk as you extend your hands out for him. He takes them, presses them to his cheek. 

   “What nickname?” You question innocently. “Oh, oh, oh, I know which one. Pretty boy.” You held his scrunched up in embarrassment face in your hands, squishing his cheeks. “So pretty.” 

    “I’m gonna spontaneously combust.” The words came out muffled because of the position his face was in, but if he were being honest, he could feel himself light up every time you said he was pretty, as amusing as the word was to him. Even if he doesn’t think he’s much- anything, really- to be fond of, he’s happy, so happy, that you disagree. 

   You call him pretty boy every chance you get. You seize the opportunity with pride, throwing a wink his direction when you can because he has the dopiest little smile on his face for the rest of the day even if he feigns irritation in the moment. 

     You greet him every morning outside his apartment building with a cup of coffee in your outstretched hand and a sweet smile curling at your lips and a, “Morning, my pretty boy,” and Peter starts his school day with a blush, his arm around the shoulders of the girl that he loves. You lean up to kiss the corner of his mouth. He’s invincible. 

    Then, you see him in chemistry class, goggles strapped to your face and a stupid apron around your neck. His heart still stops when he sees you. You slide in the seat between him and Ned, pulling at his goggle strap before it snaps back to his head as gentle as you can manage. “Did you finish the lab conclusion, pretty boy? I’m stuck on the last sent- Ned what happened to him?” You turned to the other boy, eyebrows raised in confusion because Peter is motionless and the redness is spreading all over his neck. 

   “You called him pretty again,” Ned replied, stretching his hand across the table and waving it in front of Peter’s face. “He’s probably just offended that you didn’t greet me with a compliment.” 

   “C’mon, Ned, you know I think you’re gorgeous.” 

   “I’m actually not deaf, guys.” Peter nudged you playfully, rubbing his cheeks with the sleeves of his gray sweater. You ruffle his honey hair. 

  “We know,” you answered. “Ned’s stunning, obviously-” Ned grins at this- “but you’re forever the only pretty boy for me.” Peter scrunches his nose up. Then, he takes off his goggles, placing them next to the looseleaf paper that has his neatly compiled lab report scrawled over the page. He leans forward, scooting his chair close to you so he can remove your goggles, too. He takes your face in his hands and kisses you quick. He’d put more passion into it if the teacher wasn’t standing across the room, looking for any excuse to separate the two of you. Every teacher was the same. He pulls back after a second, his hands lingering on your cheeks when he gazes at you. 

   “I love you, you beautiful and lovely and wonderful girl of mine.” Triumphantly, he removes his hands and places them back down on the desk. He catches it before you turn away toward Ned, and for a brief and fleeting moment, it’s there on your cheeks. “Oh, oh, what’s that I see? Is that a blush?” He jumps around to Ned’s spot, a stupid, prideful grin on his face as he savors the moment for himself, commits the pretty sight to memory. “Pretty girl, are you blushing?” He pressed his hands to against your face, pinching your cheek gently, lovingly. You punched him in the arm, a warning behind your eyes, but Peter didn’t care in the slightest. 

   “Yes, you big idiot,” you mumbled. “Happy now?” 

   “Oh, I’m very happy.” 

   “I hate you.” 

   “Do you really?” Peter raised his eyebrows, resting his palms against your shoulders and rubbing his thumb along the place where your collarbone peeked out of your shirt. 

   “Of course not,” you said, a grumble in your tone. “I love you and your pretty boy face, sweet little freckles and all.” You poked a couple of his freckles and kissed the one by his mouth. Peter sighed, still smiling brightly because no matter how hard he tried, he couldn’t pretend to be annoyed at you when you called him that name. He’d wear it with like a badge of honor, grateful for it. He had an effortlessly gorgeous love that thought he was the prettiest thing she had ever laid her eyes on, so what more could he ask for? 

BMC REVIVAL!!

ALRIGHT GUYS I JUST FINISHED THE SHOW AND OH. NY. GOD. IVE GOT STUFF TO SAY

(WARNING: THIS IS LONG AS HELL)

- the guy who played Jeremy had such a great voice, he pulled off the awkward vibe and executed the jokes so well

- michael. fucking. MELL. boy oh boy.

- SO GOOD

- his voice sounded EXCATLY like George Salazar,, he was adorable and amazing

- alright so before I continue talking about Michael mell (my love) lemme tell u about the audience

- lots of people were in michael cosplay and tbh? I was there for it like it looked so good

- and they were VERY vocal, I’ve been to many shows and I’ve never heard a louder audience

- I’m talking full on screaming

- anyway my point was that when Michael first went onstage the entire place BLEW UP

- the whole mall scene with Michael and Jeremy never happened, they just went straight to Payless

- also the beanbags didn’t drop out of the ceiling for two player game (mildly disapointing) but AAAA IT WAS SO GOOD

- in the beginning Michael stands behind Jeremy and like touches his hair and puts his head on his shoulder (!!)

- and during the “faaavwite personnn” part they’re both standing and michael cuddles into Jeremy’s chest, and Jeremy like playfully shoves him back and he goes falling down into the beanbags

- during the whole second part when they go “find the bad guys push them aside” they didn’t jump over all the chairs and stuff, the scene changed behind them but the stood at the front of the stage and did these karate moves and noises

- CUTE AS HELL

- the guy who played the squip was INSANLY GOOD

- michael in the bathroom. oh my god.

- you could physically see him shaking and starting to break down, by the end of the song he could barely get the words out because he was so upset oml

- the girl who played Christine was!!!!!!!!! amazing!!!!! she was so peppy and bubbly (I love play rehearsal was AMAZING), but you could still see that her character had a lot of depth

- when Michael makes an entrance at the end he came in from the audience up onto the stage and everyone just SHRIEKED

- AND RICH WAS SO HILARIOUS AND ADORABLE

- at the end he was talking in the lisp!!!

- and when he said “oh my god I’m TOTALLY bi” everyone started cheering, then when he said “so what about the headphones kid? Is he your boyfriend?” Michael walked into the room like half smiling and being all bashful and HAKDMWOE

- when Jeremy was onstage with Christine during the play Michael was on the side of the stage, everyone else was standing super still but he was shifting a lot and looked super antsy

- and the cast after was super nice!!!!! everyone took pictures with the fans and they were so grateful

I could write so much more about this buttt I’m probably being super annoying,,, but yeah it was SO GOOD,,, anyway there’s a q&a kinda thing on Sunday at the theater with some of the original cast (INCLDING GEORGE SALAZAR), so that’s a thing if ur interested!

Imagine your OTP

It’s almost 3am and they’re walking home from a bar, Person B is extremely drunk.

Person A: Seriously, we should call a cab or something. Can you even walk in a straight line?

Person B: That is SO homophobic. It’s 2017! Not all lines are straight.

Person A (exasperatedly): Oh, God.

Person B: No, babe, I’m still just me.

queertrashmouth  asked:

prompt: stan accidentally lets it slip to eddie that richie has a major crush on him

- ok I imagine Stan and Eddie sitting in the booth of some old fashioned diner

- Stan has a vanilla milkshake and Eddie has strawberry

- that’s irrelevant but anyway

- it was supposed to be a study session for their test tomorrow but like fucking always, Eddie is talking about something Richie said

- now Stan is so patient he could literally watch paint dry

- but he has had it up to here with his friends being stupid and obvious so he just fuckin goes for it

- “you know, maybe you should go do this at Richie’s house?”

- “um Richie’s not even in our bio class, stupid”

- “maybe not but he’s been dying to study your anatomy since 8th grade”

- Eddie goes about 20 different shades of red

- and Stan, the little shit, just casually sips his milkshake like “whoops did I say that out loud”

- when Eddie calms down enough to ask questions, he’s talking about 100 miles per minute

- “Did Richie really say that? Does he talk about me often? I’m gonna have a panic attack. Wait I thought he liked girls. You’re his best friend you’d know oh my GOD I’ll die if he likes me Stan I’ll just DIE”

- and Stan is honestly kinda taken aback bc sure he knew Eddie had a crush but turns out he’s just as head over heels as trashmouth is

- “oh so you love him too?”

- cue a borderline cartoonish spittake of Eddie’s milkshake

- “LOVE??!!?!?!??!?!?!”

- Eddie flies outta that diner so fast

- fuck the bio test

- fuck everything

- he’s getting to Richie’s house if it kills him

- and Stan’s still sitting there, figures he might as well order a burger for a job well done 

- the waitress is almost a little scared bc she’s never seen anybody look so damn smug

(keep the requests coming people, I’m slowly but surely getting to them)

PROMPT LIST #3

1. “For gods sake, guys! We’re NOT dating”
2. “You’re still the same guy I fell in love with”
3. “Gotcha!”
4. “Why would you prank me with something like that?!”
5. “There’s no way in hell i’m doing that”
6. “I literally don’t know how someone can be that stupid”
7. “Close your mouth, you’ll catch flies”
8. “What are you doing to me?”
9. “I’m not gonna lie, I’m really turned on by that”
10. “Give me my phone back!”
11. “YOU knew how important this was for me!”
12. “Oh shut the fuck up”
13. “You’re the one that labeled this as ‘just fun’ so I don’t own you shit”
14. “Don’t play with me, because you’re gonna lose”
15. “Forget it, you’re not even worth it”
16. “Say that one more time and you’re done”
17. “I’m no one’s property”
18. “I have a child?”
19. “I’m done with this bullshit”
20. “Why? Why did you leave?”
21. “How could you hide something like that from me!”
22. “I panicked, okay?!’
23. “I can’t believe I’m sitting in a mall jail with you of all people”
24. “Now you wanna talk? Well fuck you”
25. “How did this happened?”
26. “Just one drink”
27. “Hello? We’re in the middle of something”
28. “Oh how cute! You actually think I give a fuck”
29. “Mess with me and you’ll regret being born”
30. “I don’t fuck around”
31. “Let’s see if you can keep up”
32. “This means nothing”
33. “There’s the door. Feel free to get the fuck out”
34. “Put that down”
35. “Don’t do it, please”
36. “I’m not the same, I’m different”
37. “Nobody cares about me anymore, so why should I keep trying?”
38. “Listen to me, okay? We’re getting out of here, together”
39. “This is so stupid”
40. And yet, you’re still here”
41. “You think this is a joke? This is my life!”
42. “So this was all a lie?”
43. “We have nothing to talk about”
44. “Are you going to tell him?”
45. “Is better off this way”
46. “Hold up, you what?”
47. “You’re the worst roommate”
48. “Why are you fucking a stranger in my bed?!”
49. “Please go get herpes as far as you can from this house”
50. “Be my guest”
51. “I can do whatever I want, we’re not dating, remember?”
52. “You wanna get food at 2 am?”
53. “I will always protect you”
54. “You moved on, so did I”
55. “You’re not the same”
56. “Yeah, well, people change”
57. “You had no right to do that!”
58. “Why do you always convince me of doing the stupidest shit”
59. “How is it that your so stupid and so hot at the same time?”
60. “Call 911”
61. “This is the last time I’m letting you in my house”
62. “It was an accident!”
63. “You almost burn my house down!”
64. “I can’t keep doing this”
65. “Just be honest with me!”
66. I’m not gonna be here when she breaks your heart"
67. “Just one more night”
68. “Is this how it all ends?”
69. “You’re here!”
70. “I wanna go home”
71. “I’m not letting you go and we both know that you don’t want me to either”
72. “Keep talking all you want but you can’t deny that you want me as much as I want you”
73. “You broke my nose!”
74. “As if you were a fucking angel”
75. “Don’t make me laugh”
76. “Yeah… I don’t do relationships”
77. “Let’s face it! I’m just one of your many booty calls!”
78. “You’re nothing like them
79. “Did I actually mean something to you, ever?”
80. “I’m starting to think I’m actually going to hell”

dating peter parker would include...

dedicated to my harrison bestie anon in hopes it makes them smile :) also yes it’s really fuckin long i’m sorry i just love peter parker and have a lot of feelings

  • you actually hate to tell the story of how you two met because it’s mortifiying oh mygod
  • peter, however, loves to watch u blush about it even though it was only really embarrassing when it happened
  • taking the subway to school like every other day, you obviously had spent too many hours on the internet so u were tired as hell 
  • so tired you couldn’t grab the pole in time when the subway stopped
  • and you in an ungraceful manner, tripped, stumbled and fell
  • into his lap
  • his l a p 
  • you still get red cheeks when remember just how embarrassing it was
  • oh my god! i c-can’t believe that- i-i, i’m so so sorry- h-holy shit–
  • peter did find it extremely awkward but your mortified and blushing red face was so much more adorable 
  • n-no, it’s fine– d-do you want my seat?
  • o-oh no, it’s alright. i’d just like to crawl into a hole somewhere. sudden amnesia works too.
  • AND BOY
  • a cute girl with wit and oh my is that a nerdy shirt????
  • from them on, you had his entire heart 
  • yes i will totally be writing a full on imagine for this
  • you guys weren’t friends for long if u know what i mean 
  • like you had already face planted into his lap so you skipped most of the awkward interactions
  • you were kinda like ‘ah what the hell’ 
  • you did it while you guys were walking home together, like usual
  • hey peter, can you hold this for me?
  • yeah?” 
  • and you just grabbed his hand, grinning at him with wink 
  • cue the cutest blushing from peter 
  • peter goddamn nearly had a heart attack but couldn’t stop smiling the entire walk home 
  • he was really sad when he reached your building 
  • but then you stood on ur tippy toes and kissed him on the cheek so he wasn’t that sad
  • eventually kisses on the cheeks became kisses on the lips & it wasn’t official but you two just knew
  • let’s be real, peter is the worlds biggest dork so movie marathons are so common
  • i mean everything– star wars, back to the future, jurassic park, like man you name it 
  • and if u were a nerd too, then oH boy he would just be in a constant state of heart eyes 
  • he would be anyways but extra heart eyes if u geek out
  • c’mon pete, hurry that cute lil ass up! it’s rogue one!!
  • oh my god, please marry me right now.
  • you guys definitely try to quote movies as much as possible
  • i love you” ”i know *intense blushing* diD YOU JUST–
  • he has a such soft spot for when you guys marathon disney movies not that he tells you that
  • something about you lighting up & singing along makes him go !!!!!!! inside
  • no you two never perform disney duet songs together never ever have you done that why do u ask
  • (your favourite one to perform is hakuna matata because its a goddamn classic and peter gets so into it)
  • (breaking free from hsm is a close second because damn can peter hit those notes when he really tries)
  • peter parker is such an admirer like you dont even know
  • he could stare at you for hours and its pretty much what gets him through the day tbh
  • in fact, he has all your birthmarks and freckles committed to memory because shes so pretty i can’t deal with this
  • he blushes SO MUCH when you catch him staring
  • but lets be real, you were staring at him too
  • he blushed even more when he found that out because oh my fucking god she was staring at me do i look weird is there something on my face
  • but when you’re like no you goof, i’m admiring youu get 
  • BLUSHING STUTTERING STAMMERING PETER PARKER
  • he just never stops blushing 
  • he! would! try! so! hard! at everything 4 you
  • baking? hell yeah he’ll bake for u
  • singing? eh he’ll give it a go (but only for you)  
  • dancing? he hates it but he loves to watch u laugh and smile with him so he does it anyways (even if he sucks)
  • speaking of dancing
  • peter loves it when u dance
  • especially when you stay over and he wakes up to you dancing around the kitchen or his room 
  • his favourite is catching you off guard when you’re grooving to some 80′s song
  • babe– cutting himself off with his own laughter, i don’t think that’s dancing.
  • he loves to tease you about your funky dancing because seeing his girl blushing is like his second favourite thing
  • (the first being your smile because it completely melts his insides and everything is better when you smile at him)
  • you also love it when he’s teasing because all you have is pout and suddenly peter’s showering you in kisses 
  • peter is such a sucker for kisses
  • actually he’s such a hopeless romantic & lover of cliches like
  • constantly bringing you flowers he finds on nightly patrols? check 
  • stopping so you two can share a cutesy kiss in the rain? check 
  • dumb pick up lines that still make you laugh? check 
  • tbh you both do pickup lines
  • hey, hey y/n, are you the square root of -1? because you can’t be real 
  • are you kIDDING– NO I’M NOT BLUSHING AT YOUR DUMB PICK UP LINE GO AWAY PARKER
  • he just giggles at you from the bed
  • except when you do it, its a different story
  • hey hey hey, peter 
  • hmm?” 
  • are you related to yoda? because yodalicious.
  • peter just falls off the bed 
  • you don’t even ask if he’s alright, you just cut straight to laughing at his reaction
  • s-shut up! this isn’t because of your pick up line!! i was startled! 
  • even though he’s trying to hide his face in a pillow, you can see his pink cheeks
  • sure, peter, sure. 
  • aunt may is both a blessing and a curse to both of you 
  • because she spills BOTH OF YOUR SECRETS
  • like you can’t ramble to her about peter because she will tell him everything
  • with you in the same room 
  • oh peter, you’re wearing that shirt? i know y/n loves it, she was talking just the other day about how she find it so hot– 
  • “MAY HE DOESN’T NEED TO KNOW”
  • peter secretly really wants to know what you said about him 
  • but aunt may does it to peter too and he hates it
  • “seriously y/n, you should hear the things he says about you, i swear he’s turned into some lovesick–”
  • “nO MAY SHH YOU CAN STOP NOW”
  • makeout sessions ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
  • you both l o v e them 
  • funnily enough, peter is the one who usually starts them 
  • hey y/n, you’ve got something on your face, let me just– *kisses you all over you face*
  • because he’s more than ahead in his classes, ‘study dates’ really means makeout not that you mind though  
  • peter loves kisses everywhere
  • forehead kisses
  • nose kisses
  • shoulder kisses
  • eyelid kisses
  • back of the hand kisses
  • all the kisses
  • his absolute favourite kiss is the one he receives from you in the morning when you’ve stayed over
  • he’ll play with your hair softly and you’ll yawn & stretch and catch him gazing at you 
  • and you just smile and lean up and kiss him 
  • it never fails to make peters heart stop and when you pull away he just goes nooooooooooooo and pouts till you kiss him again 
  • it’s especially hard when you have to leave or part ways after school because peter turns into a needy lil boy
  • one more kiss! one more! 
  • peter you’ve said that seven times now!! 
  • you literally have to push his away, giggling and grinning, because otherwise he’s going to be late 
  • i swear to god parker, it’s only one class! 
  • and of course you know about him being spidey
  • you actually found out by accident 
  • you were searching thru his closest for something to wear when you stumbled across it 
  • tbh you thought it was a really dedicated costume at first
  • so you put it on and it was so fucking baggy man
  • hey peter! look at me, i’m the spider man! thwip thwip! 
  • except it was the real thing so 
  • y-y/n!! where did you find that??? 
  • don’t worry, i’ll keep your spider-man obsession a secret, peter.
  • but when you accidentally web peter’s hand to the wall, you figure out this suit is the real deal 
  • holy shit!! holy shit! you– you’re, this is the real, oh my god, you’re the spider-man!  
  • peter just panics because you’ve webbed him to the wall and he can’t actually do anything
  • no! no i’m not!
  • you freak out for like another minute before you gather your senses enough 
  • peter parker, do not play with me right now- are you spider-man?
  • would you believe me if i said it was a very detailed halloween costume?
  • after cutting him free, you squeezed him into the tightest hug because you were so goddamn proud of him 
  • but also because oh my god how many times had he risked his life and had you not known???? 
  • oh my god, this is so wicked i can’t believe you’re spider-man–
  • you can’t tell anyone! 
  • shh, you know i wouldn’t but holy god! you have to tell me everything
  • you’re not mad i didn’t tell you?” 
  • pfft, i’ll only be mad if you don’t tell me now.
  • yes i also want to make this an imagine
  • yes, you’re the one who patches him up which always ends in cuddles
  • basically you get to shower peter in constant love and affection because he would do that and more for you 
  • he’s just the perfect boyfriend??? 
  • i want a peter parker

Things Hockey Fans are tired of Hearing

  • “We need to put pucks in the net.” No really? I thought you scored by throwing the puck over the net.
  • “Lower/Upper body injury.” The most vague description in the world.
  • “The goalie is going to want that goal back.” Damn commentator, back at it again with the obvious statements.
  • “That’s not a penalty you want to take.” Goddamnit guys, why didn’t you get a different penalty.
  • “They win and lose as a team.” Tell that to the media who is currently blaming the goalie and maybe one other guy.
  • “That’s a goal you score when you’re the teams goal-scorer.” Brilliant Dr. Obvious, may I have another?
  • “They need to score another goal.” Do you hear that guys? YOU NEED TO SCORE ANOTHER GOAL.
  • “They need to play their game.” Alright guys, I know you wanted to play the Bruins game but tough shit, we’re the Caps.
  • “They need to stay healthy.” Well I’ll be, who knew injuries were bad for a team.
  • “You just won the cup, how do you feel?” Like I would still rather be anywhere in the world but standing here with you Pierre.
  • “The game is on his stick” that’s a puck
  • “A penalty is gonna be called, what’s it gonna be?” Friggen wait 15 seconds, they’ll announce it.
  • “Why are they fighting?” 10 grown ass testosterone riddled men are chasing a small piece of rubber.
  • “They need a win here.” How lovely, we are no longer in need of a loss. We’re fully stocked on those guys.
  • “Going between the benches with Pierre McGuire.” Oh my God, this silence is so blessed.
  • “He shoots top shelf where momma hides the cookies.” My mom hid the cookies at the store.
  • “He beat him like a rented mule.” Hi ASPCA, I need to report some animal abuse.
  • “He’s not helping his team in the penalty box.” He’s not helping out of it either to be fair.
internet friend!tom headcanons

for my girls over at spiderjizz, especially ruby who came up with this and let me steal the idea for this, larb you rubs!
tags: @grant-valdes-holland @sunrisehunny @spideyboys @lil-spidey @peterletmebeanavengerparker @captainswriting @quacksoff @spideryr00s @spideyyss @tomhollandisthicc @underoosie @marvelsdaughter @ladysnowren @spideyyparker @rooyeun @focused-on-holland @toms-spidey

  • okay so to start you had no idea it was tom to begin with
    • his username was “marvels-biggest-fanboyxx”
    • and he obviously didn’t go by tom but by his middle name stanley instead
    • there was never really a tip-off that it was tom
  • you just knew whoever was behind this screen made some badass edits
    • seriously they were some of the best gif edits you had seen
  • you also knew he posted some photos and videos of tom that no one had really seen before
    • “where’d you get that picture of tom? i’ve never seen it before?”
    • “oh i got it from a friend.”
    • “i’ve never seen that video before, where’d you find it?”
    • “i had to search through a lot of youtube videos”
  • anyways, you messaged whoever this stanley was because he seemed cool and you were really just looking for friends
  • you would have been building this friendship for months
    • he had basically become your best friend on this website
    • you send “stanley” pictures of tom all. the. time.
    • “snslsnsos did you see tom’s hair in his latest ig story like stab me in the fAcE”
    • “ahahahahah yeah same”
    • “tom had such a nice ass i wonder what it feels like”
    • and tom is laughing at this, thinking “real nice. it feels real nice.”
    • but you just get “i bet it feels really nice” in response
  • aside from him being your best friend, you don’t know much about him personally
  • and you totally respect his privacy about that
  • and one day “stanley” finally asks if you wanted to skype
  • and you of course jump at the opportunity because you had become so close to each other
    • you told him practically everything
    • he told you everything he could without giving away the fact that he was actually tom
  • you swap skype users and very soon after you call him
  • and you’re sitting there waiting for it to connect and wondering why the hell you’re so nervous about this
    • he’s one of your best friends for crying out loud
  • anyways it connects and you don’t see his face instead you see Tessa
  • at first you’re thinking “stanley what the hell”
  • and then it clicks like “wait a minute, i know that dog” and your eyes widen and the only thought in your brain is “no way, this must be a joke”
  • tom them pops onto the screen, holding tessa all “hello darling!”
    • mainly because he knows how much you love it when he says that
    • and you definitely ranted to him about how badly you wanted him to call you that
  • you just kind of sit there somewhat in shock going on and on about how “this is a joke. this is seriously a joke. there is no way i am on a skype call with tom holland”
  • and tom just laughs and says “it’s not a joke, darling, it’s actually me”
  • and you’re feeling so flustered and slightly embarrassed because you had basically talked about him all the time to him
  • lots and lots of blushing from you
    • tom finds it completely adorable
  • after your first initial call you guys become skype buddies
    • you’d try to call nearly everyday when you could
    • it took you ages for you to stop blushing at the SIGHT of him
  • it took a while for you to be calm around him and not blush every time he looked at you
    • tom found this absolutely adorable
  • you soon realize you don’t really have much to talk about
  • mainly because all you did was talk about him with him
  • so you talk about spider-man and all the other avengers because he’s such a marvel nerd
  • you take quizzes online to see who’s better and smarter with their avengers trivia
    • there’s lots of teasing afterwards from the winning party
  • after a while, tom gives you his phone number which is a huge step for him
  • just so he can call you and have late night calls over the phone
    • you always want to talk but you don’t want your phone bill to be absolutely insane
    • “tom i really wanna talk but my phONE BILL”
    • “pfft i’ll pay for it now please just stay on the phone with me, i wanna talk to you”
  • you guys fall asleep on the phone quite frequently because neither of you want to hang up
  • okay and hear me on this
  • tom would definitely be the type to surprise you by paying a visit to your hometown
  • and not telling you a single thing about it
  • he just sits and waits for you to figure it out
  • you’d be sitting at home in your pajamas having only woken up a few hours ago
  • and tom would skype you while he’s walking around your city/town
  • and you’re just casually talking until “hey wait a second I KNOW THAT THE CAFE”
  • he just laughs at you and probably winks
  • you’re in a slight bit of denial and don’t think twice about it before running out on the streets in your pajamas
    • which typically consist of spandex shorts and a hoodie most nights
    • it didn’t matter if it was two miles away you ran the whole entire way there
  • and your first real life meeting you run into him, knocking him backwards because you had been running so fast
  • you just stand there in front of him in your pajamas, red in the face and out of breath with your hands on your knees
    • “i just ran…two miles…to see if you…were actually here”
    • he laughs because there’s his adorable girl in front of him in her pjs who ran into town just to see him
    • he feel pretty flattered
  • it’s a little awkward though
    • he goes for a hug and you go for a handshake
    • you both kind of awkwardly laugh and switch the roles
    • more awkward laughing ensues because we’re good friends but we’ve never actually met in person before oH nO
    • but he just pulls you into a tight hug and your cheeks flush and you realize that he smells really good
  • tom offers to talk you out to breakfast in your pajamas
    • it’s pretty adorable to say the least
    • he definitely makes a comment about them
    • “by the way i love the outfit darling”
    • you just sit there pretty mortified
    • “alaodjsosnSHUT UP TOM”
  • and after he takes you to breakfast he begs you to show him around
    • “please y/n i really wanna see where you grew up”
    • “tom”
    • “please please please”
    • “tom i’m iN mY pAJAMaS”
    • “i don’t care, cmon please”
    • “!!!no i’m at least going back home to get actual pants”
  • and toms pretty confused and he’s like “what am i supposed to do then?”
  • “you come with me doofus”
  • he’s pretty shook because he actually gets to see where you live
    • even if it is for two seconds while you change
  • you get to your house and go to change completely forgetting about the old baby, school, and family photos hanging on the walls
  • he’s completely enthralled by them all
    • “aw y/n look at you! you’re so cute and tiny”
    • “jsksl thOMAS NO STOP”
  • you’re completely mortified because all of  those are the worst photos of your entire existence
  • and when you actually change you have to physically drag him out of the house
    • “aw but i wanted to see more pictures”
    • “you can see more later”
    • that’s a lie you don’t ever want him seeing old pictures of you again
  • the whole time you’re showing him around he never stops smiling
  • because you’re actually glowing when you explain things and tell him your different childhood stories
  • and then you suddenly remember that time you talked about how nice his ass is
    • you just stop in the middle of the sidewalk and tom’s looking at you so confused
    • “oH mY GOD IM SORRY ABOUT THAT ASS COMMENT I MADE BEFORE”
    • he just sits there and laughs at you
    • “it’s okay love i promise”
    • you’re still mortified by it
  • so!! much!! blushing!!
    • not just from you but from him too
  • overall you spend the entire day together creating so many new memories and inside jokes
    • you take lots of silly pictures together
    • and of each other
  • you’re pretty bummed when he has to leave to go back home
    • “do you have to leave?”
    • “unfortunately love”
    • “i’ll miss you this was fun, next time warn me though”
    • and he laughs and nods and promises he will
  • “i’m serious though i’m really going to miss you”
  • “i know darling i’ll miss you too”
  • and wow i need tom as my internet friend right now