oh my god how i burst out laughing

I gotta tell you what’s going on in my life and in gay culture in Miami right now.

So my DND campaign ended. my character died and I was like “I still want to play my character!!” and they were like “Well it can’t be the same you gotta change the name!” Her name was Grey so I was like “Fine, I’ll name her idk Flé” No one laughed but my best friend and his boyfriend. So then my best friend then says “Hey omg so Jaxx should just rename her character Flé!” and EVERYONE burst out into laughter. And then his boyfriend goes “Oh my god Duasso you’re SO FUNNY” And everyone chimes in like “omg how’d you think of that” “omg that’s so funny” cue me losing my collective shit. and then it became a run on joke that duasso invented it and i had nothing to do w it.

SO FAST FORWARD, my old DND group was made up of important gay miami night life personalities (bartenders, DJs etc) and all of a sudden my best friend and I are heading to his boyfriends bar and he says “i just want you know people…people are the using the word.” “What do you mean” and as I say that, two gay boys walk out of the bar going “Oh my god that’s so flé”

TURNS OUT. MY BEST FRIEND AND HIS BOYFRIEND AND MY DND ASSHOLES ARE NOW USING THIS WORD AND IT APPARENTLY MEANS A COPYCAT/IMITATOR/IMPOSTER (FOR OBVIOUS REASONS) AND NOW PEOPLE ARE USING IT AND I HEAR THEM AND MY BEST FRIEND AND HIS BOYFRIEND ARE TAKING CREDIT FOR IT THIS STUPID WORD THAT STARTED OFF AS A STUPID JOKE THAT HAS NOW BLOWN UP INTO NEW GAY LINGO IM???

and just. sigh. my best friend is so flé

BTS Reactions: When You Fart

Rap Monster:

*Starts laughing hysterically*

“Omg Jagiya!”

Jin:

“Yah,don’t do that while we are eating! where are your manners?”

V:

*Suffers from second hand embarrassment*

Suga:

“Did you really just?…”

Jimin:

*Bursts out laughing*

J-Hope:

He was talking to his members when you farted.

“God damn,what are you a cave man?”

Jungkook:

*Hides*

“Oh my gosh. I don’t know how to react.”

@fireflyfish replied to your postYou know what would even be funnier in the…

Well I know what I have to do today.

Yesssss. 

@gaealynn reblogged your post: You know what would even be funnier in the…

Is this where Obi-Wan reveals that he’s also beaten Anakin to the punch on that one and that the kid running around calling Satine “auntie” is 100% his? Because I’m fond of that theory

HAHAHAHA oh my GOD. My favorite part of this AU is how MUCH this would blow Anakin’s mind. 

Obi-Wan’s kid can babysit the twins and teach them how to go on Dangerous Adventures In Pursuit of Justice. 

(Also I feel like at least one person on the Council is just going to burst out laughing at all of this, because REALLY. Of course this happened, and of course it’s THESE TWO.)

2

“Fitz! Fitz, Fitz stop!” you yell, giggling uncontrollably.

Your best friend had cornered you, and was relentlessly spraying you with water. You had run out quite awhile ago, which he was quick to take advantage of.

Just as you were about to yell for help, the lab door slides open. “Oh my god, are you two seriously having a water fight?” Skye asks, grinning.

Fitz turns, water gun still in hand. “Yes, yes we are.”

Your giggles subside as Skye peers around Fitz to look at you. Your sopping wet clothes are sticking to you, while dropping onto the floor. “How did you let him beat you, (y/n)?”

You laugh, stepping forward. “I ran out of water.”

Skye shakes her head, exiting the lab and muttering to herself about how stupid smart people are. Once the lab door slides shut again, you and Fitz burst into laughter.

Coming out in General

Coming out to people in general was pretty amusing for me. But a few stories stuck out meow than others.

Best Friend: Sooo yesterday I might have let it slip that someone in the group was bisexual..

Me: Oh lord what did you say?

Best Friend: I was taking to the guys and said someone in the group likes dicks and vaginas

Me: *Bursts out laughing* oh my god I wish I was there to see. When you tell them that it’s me I want to be present.

The next day she called me over and asked if she could say. I just shrugged while she turned to the guys.

Best Friend: So remember what I said about someone liking dicks and vaginas?

Guys: *nod*

Best Friend: Well it’s *points to me and I mock bow*

Guy 1: I had no idea wow!

Me: How did you guys not know I always refer to you as straight people and in constantly obsessing over Natasha Romanoff!

Then there was my extremely religious conservative friend that I was terrified to come out too. But we’re super close so I did anyway.

Me: um hey I just wanted you to know something

Conservative Friend: yeah?

Me: I like girls and guys and I’m bisexual

Conservative Friend:…

Me: don’t hate me please

Conservative Friend: why would I? Oh gosh has anyone said anything mean give me names and I’ll beat them up!

Then that weekend she went home and read all of Genosis and came to me looking quite proud.

Conservative Friend: I found nothing in the bible against is which is why homophobes are stupid


Oh and I love all the jokes I can make and the crack my friend make.

“HOW THE– HOW’D YOU–DID YOU HEAR?!”

“Ooh the whoooole camp heard ya. You were shouting.”

“WHAT?!”

((earlier–

“PREPARE YOURSELF, BECAUSE I’M GONNA SAY IT!  ROBIN… I’M IN LOVE WITH YOU!”

“… oh my godS CHROM” 
“Is that CHROM??!”
“Is he… shouting his proposal?”
“-facepalm- oop. there he goes.”
“I mean we all knew this was com– hold up, did he just say “wyvern… in heat?!”” 
“… oh my sweet Naga.”

Smooth Chrom, smoooooth.

_____________________________________

I started a new game and just got to the s support conversation between Chrom and Robin so much secondhand embarrassment. I totally missed this wyvern line last time I played, and bursted out laughing. I feel like he would’ve been shouting the entire time because he was so nervous.

Bonus:

it’s okay robin still loves you

Chocolate & Mac N Cheese

Request(s):

  1. can you please write an imagine with prompts 7 and 17?!
  2. I totally didn’t specify on the 7 and 17 request idk who to choose for it bc Peter would be funny, but so would Tommy and Robbie.. you decide, you’re the almighty author 🙏🏼

Prompt(s):

  1. 7. “Please take my bra off… that one isn’t your color.”
  2. 17. “Tampons? You want me to buy you tampons?”

Warnings: none

Notes: Done with Robbie! 

“How do I look?” Robbie asked. You were laying in bed still, your boyfriend in your room. You turned over reluctantly, looking at Robbie. You were cramping majorly and felt like death.

Seeing Robbie made you burst out into laughter. You had heard him shuffling around, but you had no clue what he was doing. He knew you didn’t feel good, so he wanted to make you laugh.

“Oh my God,” you laughed, clutching your stomach. “Please take my bra off… that one isn’t your color.” You giggled loudly.

Robbie stood shirtless in your room with your bra strapped onto him. He gasped. “What? What do you mean? This coral bra with bright pink hearts isn’t my color?” He was talking in his best girly voice, mocking shock.

“No, but my the red one with black roses would definitely suit you, baby.” You laughed, but groaned at the end from the harsh cramps.

“Okay, fine. I’ll put that one on. But turn around, you can’s see me… topless.”

You turned back around, facing your wall and burying yourself further under your covers. “You’re ridiculous, Rob.” 

You heard more shuffling around as you shut your eyes. You wanted to sleep the cramps away even though that wouldn’t work. Still, you tried.

Robbie took your bra off, tossing it on the floor. He crawled right into bed with you, wrapping an arm around you. He snuggled up to you, taking in your scent. He caressed your forehead with his thumb.

“You okay?” He asked you.

“I’ll live,” you mumbled. “It’s only that blasted time of the month.”

“Anything I can do? I can run you a hot bath. Or massage your belly. Does that work? What if I rubbed your tummy, would that actually work?”

You stifled some chuckles, grinning and turning to look at him. “I don’t think so. But a hot bath would be nice.” 

Robbie perked his head up, kissing you temple. “Then I will run you a hot bath.” He got up, going to your restroom. The water turned on, water filling up the tub. You stayed in bed, clutching your stomach. You hated your cramps. They were some of the worst cramps ever. Some of the worst pain you’d ever felt. It always made you stay in bed for a few days, too in-pain to do anything.

“Your bath awaits, my lady,” Robbie came back into your room. You lifted your arms up in the air.

“Carry me?” You asked, being lazy. Robbie grinned, shaking his head at you. He went over and picked you up, your arms going around his neck. He set you in the bathroom, seeing bubbles in the tub.

“Yay, I still had bath bubbles?” Robbie nodded.

“Yep, I put a lot in. Also, I found some bath salts and threw those in there, too.”

You pecked Robbie on the mouth, leaning on him for a moment. Though that was cut short when you started taking off your clothes and getting in the tub. The warm water engulfed your body, relaxing the cramps in the slightest way. It relaxed you, and you felt content.

“Anything else I can get for the princess?” Robbie asked in a soft tone.

You gave him a look, a smug smile appearing. “Can you go to the store and buy me tampons? I just need a box of Playtex Sport.”

Robbie’s eyes went a little wide. “Tampons? You want me to buy you tampons?”

You nodded your head. “Please? I ran out and keep forgetting to buy more.”

He rolled his eyes playfully, agreeing. You smiled at him as he went to go get his wallet and keys. He told you he’d be back, and left.

While waiting, you soaked in the tub. You got out at some point to grab your phone to put on music. Getting back in felt even better than the first time. The water was so warm and smooth. You loved the bubbles, too. A mountain of them covering you. You leaned back and shut your eyes.

“Pst, Y/N,” Robbie shook you awake. “Y/N, you fell asleep,” he chuckled.

You woke up, the bath lukewarm now. The bubbles just about died down as well. You looked around to see Robbie with two grocery bags.Rubbing your eyes, you stood up, grabbing your towel hanging on the towel wrack. You wrapped yourself up, walking back to your bedroom.

“How’re you feeling?” Robbie asked, following you like a puppy.

“Better, but they’ll more than likely come back in a half hour.”

You dried off, putting on sweatpants and a loose tee. Robbie sat on your bed casually, waiting for you to finish getting dressed. 

“I know you said Playtex, but I didn’t know which one to get… there was one that says super absorbency, but one said regular, and another said super plus… but then there was one that had light. I didn’t get the light one though. Isn’t there a lot of blood? I thought super plus would work, but what if it’s not as much as i think? I don’t know any of this stuff, and you didn’t pick up your phone because you were sleeping…” Robbie rambled, taking three boxes out of the bag. You laughed at him. He was too cute.

“Regular is fine, but thank you. Now I’m set for a while.” You giggled, taking the boxes. Robbie’s cheeks were flushed, his lips tucked in.

“I also got you your favorite chocolate. Those blueberry filled chocolate ones from Ghirardelli. And I got you boxes of Mac N Cheese. I can make some for you.”

You stared at him, seeing two bags of Ghirardelli, and four boxes of Mac N Cheese. You stared at him in amazement. You’d never been with a guy who was so… kind to you when on your period.

“You treat me to well,” you commented. “I like it though.”

“You deserve the best. Plus, I grew up with three girls in the house. My dad and I always treated them like princesses when it was their time of the month, and now I’m going the same to you.”

You plopped down on your bed next to Robbie, leaning on his shoulder.

“I love you,” you sighed contently.

“I love you, too.”

“Mac N Cheese does sound good right now…”

Robbie chuckled, grabbing a box. “Then I’ll make us some. Care to join me?”

You nodded your head. Both you and Robbie got up, heading to your kitchen. He got started on cooking, you occasionally eating a Ghirardelli square as you sat on the counter and watched.

“Ugh,” you groaned. “I’m going to lay down on the couch. Cramps are back.”

“Okay, let me know if you need anything. Rest.” Robbie stirred the noodles as you went to lay down.

You smiled to yourself, happy that you were with Robbie. He treated you so fairly. Always there for you. You knew from the moment you met him that he was the one.

Oh. My. GOD. I had to keep the straightest face today in class..it was so hard not to burst out laughing…okay, so a student, blushing furiously, calls me over to his computer. He has the monitor turned to face to the tower so no one can see the screen. Mumbling, he tells me that he was on a website looking up how to do an origami cat creation when this NSFW popup came up and wouldn’t go away. 

I stare at him, trying to comprehend what he is saying and then I pull the monitor back ever so slightly to see a full window popup for a porn ad with very graphic porn activities going on (animated of course). This poor kid starts stuttering and stammering about how he was on a legit site and he has no idea how this happened. Keep in mind, that the schoolboard is supposed to be blocking risque websites. 

Anyways, I can’t even close the popup cause it’s a total virus that froze the entire browser…it’s his computer so I can’t even bring up the Task Manager to hard shut it down cause the students don’t have access to it, so I had to hard shut off the whole computer. Meanwhile, this kid is almost in tears, his friend is bugging him, asking him what kind of popup it was…and I am trying so hard not to laugh over the utter ridiculousness of the situation. I tell the friend to stop and focus on his work, I get the computer off, and I reassure the student that it wasn’t his fault, that he took the perfect steps in the situation, of turning the monitor and getting me so everything is okay.

But wow….what a moment :P

  • <p> <b>INFP:</b> you know what's funny?<p/><b>INTP:</b> ....hm?<p/><b>INFP:</b> we haven't spoken to each other all summer. And, like, we act like we only saw each other the other day.<p/><b>INTP:</b> yeah...I just realised that. *chuckles*<p/><b>INFP:</b> we could probably spend five years apart and then be like<p/><b></b> "Oh hey INTP how's it going with school?"<p/><b></b> "Yeah INFP no longer apart of that hellhole."<p/><b></b> "Cool. "<p/><b>INTP:</b> *bursts out laughing for a solid 30 seconds*<p/><b>INTP:</b> OH MY GOD THATS US. We're so socially retarded.<p/><b>INFP:</b> *is floating in sea of happiness because I made INTP laugh* yeah<p/><b></b> *goes to class*<p/><b></b> See you in five years. *waves*<p/><b>INTP:</b> *laughs again*<p/></p>

anonymous asked:

“You poured your drink on him and called him a “useless cocksucker” because he wouldn’t give you a ride home… on his skateboard.” Kira Yukimura, please?

Originally posted by hunnvm

You frowned at your phone, “What’s up?” Kira asked you, passing you a bottle of water to help with your hangover headache.

“Stiles is totally blanking me.” You frowned, “Like I can see he’s reading them but he’s not replying to any.”

Kira laughed, “He’s probably still not over last night at the loft.”

You turned to her, “What do you mean? When I was teasing him about his crush on Lyd? I didn’t mean anything mean! I was just a bit drunk!”

“You don’t remember?”

“Remember what?”

“You poured your drink on him and called him a “useless cocksucker” because he wouldn’t give you a ride home… on his skateboard.”

Kira burst out laughing as your face blanched, “Oh my god, how drunk was I?”

3

So, the last issue of Daredevil: End Of Days has this really thoughtful and touching scene where an important figure is imparting a lot of important knowledge. 

And then there’s three pages of fapping. 

I’m pretty sure nobody working on this book actually knows what “fap fap fap” means on the internet but I have to admit that in an otherwise dramatically tense book it did make me raise an eyebrow. 

Still, Daredevil End Of Days is a spectacular book – if you haven’t been reading it, keep an eye out for the trade, it’ll be worth your time. 

[From Daredevil: End Of Days #8, 2013.]

anonymous asked:

Ikimaru you are simply a /godess/ when it comes to DirkJake like omf *gives you ALL the huggles*

tHANK

Anon:omG the “OH NO” is what got me, that is beautiful and amazing thank you

haha thank youu! you know I like writing silly stuff on shirts B)

Anon:OH MY GOD I WAS IN A ROOM WITH MY FAMILY AND BURST OUT LAUGHING AT THE DIRKJAKE DRAWING AND THEY ALL GAVE ME WEIRD LOOKS O H MY GO D

Anon:YOU RUINED ME WITH DIRKJAKE. ITS MY NEW OTP THANKS TO U. MY FRIEND THINKS I AM SO CRAZY BECAUSE ITS HER NOTP. THANK YOU

omfgg

Anon:i love jakes bedhead?? i love how you draw his hair period??? i love love LOVE sorry have a nice day

thank youu!

anonymous asked:

Prompt: I'm going to need you to put on some underwear before you say something else.

“What are you doing in there?” Rose calls out to the Doctor, from the other side of the bathroom door. “You’re stumbling around and knocking things over like - oh my god, are you drunk?

The door opens and the Doctor shoots her a lazy grin as he leans against the doorframe. “Not drunk. Just a little…” He squints for a second. “…tiny, tiny bit tipsy.”

“You’re pissed!” She bursts out laughing, then trails her eyes down his body, before squeezing them shut with a yelp. “Doctor!”

“What?”

“Why are you undressed?!”

Keep reading

zanzetsuken said: I KNOW MAN! Like there was this dude yelling at Sasuke to say something and screamed so hard when he heard sasuke’s line and omg we burst out laughing

oh my god HAHAHAHA WHAT EVEN. you know the part where the old man shows up? i heard three or four people whisper, “IT’S JESUS”

people were laughing (me included) at toneri’s gross puppet body all dismembered and melted on the ground and his messed up face while he was still talking about his plan. we even laughed at when toneri said he’ll marry hinata at first.

of course the random guy at the back who shouted, “IT’S ABOUT TIME” when naruto confessed XD

just the atmosphere of the cinema enhanced the entire experience! i loved when everyone clapped at the naruhina scenes, awwwed at the sad moments, laughed at the times when sakura/sai/shikamaru commented on naruto’s idiocy. even the little things, like naruto eating cup ramen or telling hinata he has to go outside to piss made us laugh. heck, the puppets were so creepy it made everything hilarious. IT WAS JUST OVERALL BRILLIANT. best cinema experience of my life tbh. i can’t wait for our friends in other countries to go watch it in theatres too! YOU WON’T REGRET IT GUYS.