oh my god how i burst out laughing

“Prom was invented just to make girls starve so they can fit in a dress and compete over a stupid title.”

“Uh –” Derek blinks, eyes his sister dubiously, “I’m not a girl?”

Cora huffs. “Whatever.”

In the kitchen Laura bursts out laughing. “Don’t worry.” She yells. “Cora is just jealous she will have to wait five years to go to her own prom.”

“I’m not going!” Cora yells back. “Prom is stupid, I don’t even know why you’re going,” she tells Derek, “it’s not like you know how to have fun.”

Derek raises an eyebrow while Laura just laughs harder. “Oh my god.” Their older sister says. “I stay away for six months and Cora turns into a sassy queen.” She walks into the living room, pretends to wipe at her eyes. “I’m so proud.”

“You two are ridiculous.” Derek says, turning around. “And I’m just going because Erica promised to pay me. With ice cream.” Then he gives Cora a wicked smile. “That I’m not going to share with either of you.”

“You are the worst brother!” Cora yells as he begins to climb the stairs. “And I hope you fall on your ass while trying to dance!”

“Can’t hear you!” Derek’s cell begins to ring. “Too busy getting ready to prom!”

Laura lets out a high-pitched laughter. “I love you two so much.”

Derek shakes his head fondly, closes his bedroom door behind himself just as Cora tells Laura to shut up. “Hey.” He answers the phone, collapsing on his bed. “What’s up?”

“Yo,” Stiles answers, “whatcha doing?”

“Listening to my sisters fight.” He says, snorting when he hears his dad start complaining about all the yelling and ‘no, Cora, I’m not letting you go to prom, you’re thirteen!’. “I’m gonna have to check the trunk of my car tomorrow night.”

Stiles laughs. “She’s not that good.”

“If you keep teaching her, she will be.” Derek blurts out, curses himself mentally when he realizes it came out harsher than he intended.

It’s just – sometimes he can’t help it. He’s known Stiles since they were four, Cora wasn’t even born then, but one day she turned eleven and Stiles became her new favorite person. Stiles couldn’t find it funnier and took Cora as his little apprentice. He even taught her how to cheat on Mario Kart.

He’s never taught Derek that.

Derek rolls his eyes, thinks about his little sister still downstairs pouting and trying to convince their dad that she’s old enough to go out. He shouldn’t be jealous of her, but the thing is – he grew up with two sisters, he knows how to share toys and food, but he doesn’t know how to share Stiles.

Because Stiles is his.

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BNHA: count your blessings, not your flaws

Summary: Midoriya Izuku has never been asked out, confessed to, or flirted with, except as a joke.


Shouto knows he isn’t good at this.

He never has been. He can’t tell whether this is just the way he is, or it’s one more thing he can blame on his father, but he knows that he isn’t good at this. People call him stoic, and cold. Some even call him mysterious. Others call him emotionless.

It’s not that he doesn’t feel. He does feel, but it all gets locked inside and none of it ever shows. Sometimes it’s because he can’t show it. Other times it’s because he’s afraid to.

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Flufflet #3 for @lifeinahole27 as a reward for writing her CSBB!

Sometime after the season 6 finale, the gang decides to look into the whole “song inside me” thing, and Blue is able to return their memories of the whole debacle.

“I can’t believe we forgot all this,” Snow said, almost whispering.

“It was necessary,” Blue said, like that explained everything, which it didn’t. But this was Blue, so it was about as good of an explanation as anyone was ever going to get.

“Yeah, well, it was a memory I could have done without,” Regina said, as though she had a bad taste in her mouth. “Me, singing and dancing like some kind of …”

"Don’t say it,” David warned.

“Disney character,” Henry finished. “I wish I could have seen it and heard it. All I have is the page here.”

“Look,” Emma said. “What matters is that all of your songs–the happy ones, the sad ones, the angry ones–all of them, that’s what I needed to keep the Black Fairy from crushing my heart. So even if you’re embarrassed now, I’m grateful.”

Snow and David smiled almost beatifically, and Regina sighed. Zelena shrugged. “I’ve nothing to be embarrassed about; I sounded fantastic.”

“Better than me?” David challenged.

“I think the Rabbit Hole does karaoke,” Snow said. “If we want to find out.”

Emma snickered at the thought of her dad and Zelena going head to head in a karaoke competition. Killian, though, was uncharacteristically silent.

Actually, he’d been quiet the whole time. She turned to look at him, but he refused to meet her gaze, staring at Blue instead. Weird.

“So, what’s wrong?” she asked as she plopped down on the bed and watched as he finished pulling on his pajamas.

“What’s that, love?”

“What’s wrong? You’ve been acting weird since Blue gave you guys your … musical memories back. Why?” She paused. “Was your song embarrassing or something?”


“Well, I know you can’t be insecure about your singing voice. You already know I think you’ve got a sexy one.”

He chuckled. “No.”

“Well, what then? And don’t tell me you’re not upset because we both know you are.”

He sighed as he climbed into bed and pulled her into his arms. “All right, but it’s … odd, I suppose.”

“I’m the daughter of Snow White and Prince Charming and I’m married to Captain Hook. My closest friends are the Evil Queen, and her sister, the Wicked Witch, and Belle from Beauty and the Beast. I think I’m good with odd.”

“Not sure it’s the same variety of odd, love, but fair enough.”

“Just tell me.”

“I’m trying to.” He paused. “You recall your parents and Regina discussing their musical tete-a-tete?”

“Yeah.” God, she would have paid so much money to see that.

“They showed up at the tavern I was drinking at, offered me all the gold and jewels I wanted, and asked for me to take them to Regina. I refused their payment, insisting the only thing that would satisfy me would be my revenge.”

“And by insisting, I’m assuming …”

“Aye, I may have insisted rather musically,” he admitted.

“So you’re upset because you refused?”

“No, I agreed,” he said. “They realized I wanted revenge on the Dark One and told me they had him prisoner. We struck a deal, and I brought them to Regina as requested.”

“Okay.” Was he upset that her parents had almost been complicit in him murdering Gold? That he’d brought them to Regina like they’d asked? “I don’t get what’s wrong,” she admitted.

“I–” He took a deep breath. “It’s just so strange.”


“Emma, you were there.”

“I–what? No, I wasn’t.”

“Yes, you were.”

Oh. Oh.

“So you’re upset because you bumped into my mom when she was pregnant with me?”

“I’m not upset,” he corrected. “It’s just odd, isn’t it? Here I am, singing about how all I care about is revenge, and my unborn wife is right there.”

She couldn’t help it. She wished she could have, with her husband sitting next to her, clearly struggling with the whole scenario. She should have been supportive and understanding.

But she couldn’t help it. She burst out laughing.

“Oi, this isn’t funny, Swan.” The giggles would not stop. “Swan, please, you can’t tell me you don’t find this at least slightly strange!”

“Oh come on,” she said, trying to regain her breath. “Killian, you’re, like, three hundred years older than I am and that hasn’t mattered to either of us.”

“But this is different!”

“Not that different.” She burst out laughing again. “Oh my god, you, like … practically serenaded me while I was in the womb!”

“It wasn’t a serenade, and I wasn’t–love, you must stop laughing.”

“Sorry, I’m sorry!” But she couldn’t.

He sighed angrily and moved away, turning to shut off the lamp on his nightstand. “Well, good night, then.”

“Killian, come on.” Okay, it was less funny now. Still funny, obviously, but with how upset he was getting, she needed to cut it out. “Look, it’s really not that weird.”

“Isn’t it?”

“Will it be weird when I get pregnant to sing to our unborn kid?” He didn’t answer. “Because that’s a normal thing, you know? And then they come out and grow up into adults, and you don’t sit there feeling weird that you used to sing to them before they were born.”

Not that she’d had any experience in that area. Even if she hadn’t had a cellmate in juvie, she probably wouldn’t have tried singing to her baby bump. But that had been a different situation; if Neal hadn’t given her up, and they’d stayed together, the two of them would definitely have done it.

“I know that’s different,” she said, when Killian didn’t respond. At least her giggles had subsided. “Because it’s your kid and not your future spouse. But still, it’s really not that weird.”

“No, that’s not it.” His voice was tentative, like he was unsure of what he was about to say. “Just … when you get pregnant?”

She froze. She’d made offhanded references to hypothetical siblings for Henry, but at no point had she explicitly told Hook that she wanted more kids. And now it had just kind of slipped out, and not in a way that she would have wanted to put it when she eventually brought it up.

“I’m sorry,” she said quickly. “I know we haven’t talked about it. I shouldn’t have said it.”

“No, no.” And now his arms were around her again. “You want more children, Emma?”

“I mean … yeah, I do. I guess we should have talked about it before we got married and stuff.”

“Because you believe that I’m not interested in having children with you?”

“I didn’t say that,” she pointed out. “Just, you’ve told me that Milah never wanted more kids and you were fine with that.”

“I loved Milah deeply,” he said. “I knew that being with her meant that my only experience as a father would be if we went back for Baelfire, and I was willing to accept that life. But it wasn’t because I didn’t want children of my own.”


His arms tightened around her. “Swan, I would love to have children with you. More than anything.”

“Oh?” Her heart beat faster.


“Okay, but you have to promise me something.”


“You’ve got to sing that song for me.”

“…I think I made a mistake.”

Bucky rolled his eyes. “Oh my God, you had Tony eating out of the palm of your hand. Why are you not fucking him right now?”

Steve cringed. “…Because I made a mistake.”

Bucky turned to scowl at him. “How in the fuck did you mess up right before sealing the deal?”

“I, uh, well.” Steve blushed bright red. “We were… making out. And talking. …Dirtily.”

Bucky sat up straight. “Steve, you’ve never talked dirty in your life unless it was swearing like a sailor.”

“I know,” Steve hissed, glaring at him. “Which is how I made the mistake! Don’t tell Natasha because she’ll murder me!”

“Fine.” Bucky was going to tell Natasha all about this. “And what mistake was that?”

“I! Um!” Steve turned away abruptly, rubbing his arm. “…Tony said. Um. That he’d been naughty. And needed to be punished.”

“Oh nooo,” Bucky whispered, hands going to his cheeks.

“And I kind of panicked, you know, because Tony, uh. He’s kind of. Self-destructive sometimes.”

Bucky continued to stare at him in awe, and wondered if this was what watching a train wreck was like.

“So I said–” Steve stopped, then swallowed thickly. “I said, ‘it’s okay, I forgive you. We all make mistakes.’”

This was a train wreck caused by smashing into a wall of baby bunnies holy shit.

“So, uh. Well, it took Tony a minute to realize what I’d said. And then he did. And. Um.” Steve stared out the window. “He walked into the bathroom and he’s been in there for fifteen minutes.”

“Steve, you fucking idiot,” Bucky whispered.

Steve groaned and collapsed onto the floor. “I know, okay?!”

The door to their apartment burst open, and there was Natasha. “Why did I get an SOS text from Tony?!”

Steve gaped at her, terrified.

“…Steve made a mistake,” Bucky answered quickly, perfectly willing to throw his best friend under the bus. “He’s in the bathroom.”

“If he’s bleeding,” Natasha hissed, letting the threat hang there as she stalked to the bathroom.

Steve stared at the ceiling, resigned. His mom had always worried that he wouldn’t make it to thirty-five. He should have known she’d been just as worried about him saying the wrong thing as she was him coughing his lungs out.

He cringed as he heard Natasha burst out laughing, but it was quickly muffled, and then there were hurried whispers. A few minutes later, she exited the bathroom, shutting the door quietly behind her. She was grinning.

“Do you always grin before you murder people?” Steve asked sadly.

“Bucky, come fuck me at my place,” she ordered cheerfully. “Steve, see to Tony.”

“What,” Steve said, but she’d already grabbed Bucky’s ear and was dragging him out–not that he looked too put-out about it. He watched the door close behind them, then awkwardly got to his feet and approached the bathroom. “Um. Tony? Can I come in?”

The door opened just a crack, and he slipped inside.

His stomach fell to the floor when he saw tears running down Tony’s cheeks. “Oh my God.”

Tony peeked up at him, then threw his head back and slid down the toilet so his back was on the lid instead of his butt. His entire body was shaking, and he covered his mouth. “St-!”

“I’m sorry,” Steve said hurriedly. “I didn’t mean to–Are you fucking laughing?!” he shouted when he realized that the other man was grinning.

Tony waved his free hand frantically, little wheezing noises escaping from between his fingers.

“I can’t believe this! I thought–I thought I’d ruined everything, and you just came in here to laugh?!” Steve exclaimed, but it was hard to stay angry when Tony finally let out a bark of laughter as he slid off the toilet and onto the floor. “Yeah, laugh it up, you dick!”

Tony wrapped his arms around his stomach, once again laughing so hard that he was making no sounds except for tiny wheezes.

Steve couldn’t help the smile that came to his lips. “I thought Natasha was going to murder me, Tony!”

“HAAAHAHA!” Tony rocked onto his other side, kicking his feet wildly.

“Tony!” Steve grabbed his shoulders so he wouldn’t knock himself out on the tub. “It’s not that funny!”

“You were so earnest,” Tony sobbed out, grinning. “Oh my God!”

Steve rolled his eyes, smiling fondly, and bent down to kiss his laughing mouth. “Well, how was I supposed to know what was going on?”

“I expected you to say I needed a spanking or something,” Tony admitted, lifting a hand to wipe his eyes. “Oh God! Do I have abs? I feel like I should have abs from how hard and long I laughed.”

Steve grinned, which then faded into an awkward smile. “Um. I’m hard and long.”

“STEVE!” Tony screeched, bursting into laughter again, but took some of the sting out of it by pressing giggly, open-mouthed kisses to his jaw and neck. “That was awful!”

“Yeah,” Steve admitted, but couldn’t bring himself to be actually embarrassed. “Why did you send Natasha an SOS text if you were just in here laughing?”

“I wasn’t trying to, I was trying to type out what had happened, but I was laughing so hard the words got mixed up and she thought something was wrong.”

Steve paused. “…What do I have to do to keep you from telling everyone?”

“Everyone already knows!” Tony laughed. “Natasha sent a group text about it!”

“Aw, fuck!” Steve swore, because God damn it now Clint and Sam were going to be insufferable.

Tony drew him down for another kiss, laughing quietly into his mouth. “’ll make it worth your while?” he offered, smiling up at him.

“…I mean, I might as well get sex if my friends are going to torment me,” Steve decided, and rolled his eyes when Tony burst out laughing and sputtering ‘no okay I’ll calm down in a minute I swear!’

tearful goodbyes | kj apa x reader

Originally posted by asosyalbey


prompt: 32- “it’s okay to cry”

“final call for boarding to vancouver gate 3, final call for boarding to vancouver gate 3, thank you”

you cling tight to your boyfriend tears threatening to spill for, your eyes as you know you have to let go of him in a matter of seconds.

“ill be back babe, you can come visit in a month or two” you pull back and glance into his eyes, he dips down and plants a warm kiss on your forehead as he fiddles with your hair.

“i know but a month or two, it’s such a long time” you whine tears spilling from your eyes “ugh im sorry im crying again” i chuckle causing myself to cry harder

“hey hey-” he whispers soothingly tilting my chin up to look into his eyes “it’s okay to cry baby- we can talk everyday i promise” you join your lips with before you break apart.

hands still joined as we wait in the queue for kj to be checked onto the plane “do you have to go” you stall tugging on his arm causing the red haired boy to laugh

“i do” he reassures me pulling me into his chest, an arm wrapped protectively across my shoulders

“i don’t know if i trust a faux red head” you state chasing the boy to burst into laughter, god how you loved his laugh.

a grin spreads wide on his face as he struggles to catch his breathe “you can trust me okay- it’ll go by soo fast you’ll be whining that you don’t have the whole bed to yourself”

i roll my eyes, my tears drying “okay that is a good point, you’re definitely a bed hog, oh and super messy” you complain “and i can go out more and get super drunk-” you joke

he stops turning to face you “okay can you go back to the blubbering mess? because now it seems like your not even going to miss me” he complains pulling out his puppy eyes.

“you’re such a dork” i poke his chest as he’s called next in line his boarding pass checked before the lady gives him the all clear to board.

he takes his pass back and grabs his bag before walking back over to you, wrapping you up in a tight embrace, kissing your head “god im going to miss you” he whispers breathing in your scent.

“you’ll have cole- im sure you won’t be without a cuddle buddy for long” i tease and he pouts clinging to me for dear life

“but you’re my favourite cuddle buddy” you let out and laugh playing with his sweatshirt.

“now who’s the one being clingy huh?” he buries his face in your neck erupting a giggle as he’s stubble tickles your neck

“kj! you’re going to miss your flight” you try and reason with him as he gives you and eye roll connecting your lips together, his hand creeping down to your ass giving it a full squeeze

“keneti james fitzgerald apa did you just squeeze my ass” you scold secretly loving it

pecking your lips he grins “god im going to miss your ass” you smack his chest, the both of you falling into laughter.

“you gotta go kj” you whisper a tear spilling from the corner of your eye, he nods giving you another kiss before placing one on your cheek

“i love you” he whisper backing away from you

“i love you too, have a safe flight” you yell down the terminal as you watch the grin on the red headed boy grow smaller and smaller as he walked further and further away.

what a goof ball.

on trust and manipulation

Back in early high school, I knew a girl - we were kinda friends by virtue of having multiple friends in common, but in hindsight, she never much liked me - who had this purebred dog. I’d met him at her place, and he wasn’t desexed, which was pretty unusual in my experience, so it stuck in the memory. And one day, as we were walking across the playground, this girl - I’ll call her Felice - said to me, “Hey, so we’re going to start using my dog as a stud.” And I’m like, Oh? And she’s like, “Yeah, we’ve been talking to breeders, we’re going to get to see his puppies and everything,” and I made interested noises because that actually sounded pretty interesting, and she went on a little bit more about how it would all work -

And then, out of nowhere, she swapped this sly look with another girl, burst out laughing and exclaimed, “God, you’re so gullible. I literally just made that up. You’ll believe anything!”

And I was just. Dumbfounded. Because I was standing there, staring at them, and they were laughing like I was an idiot, like they’d pulled this massive trick on me, and all I could think, apart from why the fuck they felt moved to do this in the first place, was that neither of them knew what gullible means. Like, literally nothing in that story was implausible! I knew she had an undesexed, male, purebred dog! It made total sense that he be used for a stud! And it wasn’t like I was getting this information from a second party - the person who actually owned the dog was telling me herself! And I felt so immensely frustrated, because they both walked off before I could figure out how to articulate that gullible means taking something unlikely or impossible at face value, whereas Felice had told me a very plausible lie, and while the end result in both cases is that the believer is tricked, the difference was that I wasn’t actually being stupid. Rather, Felice had manipulated the fact that she occupied a position of relative social trust - meaning, I didn’t have any reason to expect her to lie to me - to try and make me feel stupid.

Which, thinking back, was kind of par for the course with Felice. On another occasion, as our group was walking from Point A to Point B, I felt a tugging jostle on my school bag. I didn’t turn around, because I knew my friends were behind me, and my bag was often half-zipped - I figured someone was just shoving something back in that had fallen out, or had grabbed it in passing as they horsed around. Instead, Felice steps up beside me, grinning, and hands me my wallet, which she’d just pulled out, and tells me how oblivious I was for not noticing that she’d been rifling my bag, and how I ought to pay more attention. This was not done playfully: the clear intent, again, was to make me feel stupid for trusting that my friends - which, in that context, included her - weren’t going to fuck with me. As before, I couldn’t explain this to her, and she walked on, pleased with herself, before I could try.

The worst time, though, was when I came back from the canteen at lunch one day, and Felice, again backed up by another girl, told me that my dad had showed up on campus looking for me. By this time, you’d think I’d have cottoned on to her particular way of fucking with me, but I hadn’t, and my dad worked close enough to the school that he really could’ve stopped in. So I believed her, a strange little lurch in my stomach that I couldn’t quite place, and asked where he was. She said he’d gone looking for me elsewhere, at another building where we sometimes sat, and so I hurried off to look for him, feeling more and more anxious as I wondered why he might be there.

I was halfway across campus before I let myself remember that my mother was in hospital.

I felt physically sick. My pulse went through the roof; I couldn’t think of a reason why my dad would be at school looking for me that didn’t mean something terrible had happened to my mother, that her surgery had gone wrong, that she was sick or hurt or dying. And when my dad wasn’t where she’d said he would be, I hurried back to Felice - who was now sitting with half our mutual group of friends - only to be met with laughter. She called me gullible again, and that time, I snapped. I chased her down and punched her, and the friends who’d only just arrived, who didn’t know what had happened or why I was reacting like that, instantly took her side. Noises were made about telling the rest of our friends what I’d done, and I didn’t want them to hear Felice’s version first, so I ran off to the library, where I knew they were, to tell them first.

I walked into the library. I found our other friends. I was shaky and red-faced, and they asked me what had happened. I told them what Felice had done, that I’d hit her for it, that my mother was in hospital for an operation - something I’d mentioned in passing over the previous week; multiple people nodded in recognition - and how I’d thought Felice’s lie meant that something bad had happened. And then I burst into tears, something I almost never did, because it wasn’t until I said it out loud that I realised how genuinely frightened I’d been. I sat down at the table and cried, and a girl - I’ll call her Laurel - who I’d never really been close to - who was, in fact, much better friends with Felice than with me - put her arm around my shoulders and hugged me, volubly furious on my behalf.

And then the other girls showed up, and Laurel said, with that particular vicious sincerity that only twelve-year-olds can really muster, “Prepare to die, Felice,” and I almost wanted to laugh, but didn’t. A girl who was a close friend, who’d come in with Felice, took her side, outraged that I’d punched someone, until Laurel spoke up about my mother being in hospital, and everyone went really quiet. Which was when I remembered, also belatedly, that Laurel’s own mother was dead; had died of cancer several years previously, which explained why she of all people was so angry. I have a vivid memory of the look on Felice’s face, how she tried to play it off - she said she hadn’t known about my mother, I pointed out that I’d mentioned it multiple times at lunch that week, and she lost all high ground with everyone.    

Felice never played a trick on me again.

Eighteen years later, I still think about these incidents, not because I’m bearing some outdated grudge, but because they’re a good example of three important principles: one, that even with seemingly benign pranks, there’s a difference between acting with friendly or malicious intent; two, that ignorance of context can have a profound effect on the outcome regardless of what you meant; and three, that getting hurt by people who abuse your trust doesn’t make you gullible - it means you’re being betrayed. 

And I feel like this is information worth sharing.  

((Ghost hunter AU prompts because the world needs more of ghost hunting AUs.

  • “I can straight up see ghosts, you’re kind of sensitive to them and you could be hit by a rock by one and not notice, let’s form a ghost hunting team”
  • “I thought I saw something legitimate but it turns out it was just a baby raccoon”
  • Persion A: “We’re investigating a church, don’t swear. It’s disrespectful. Person B: "I won’t swear. You won’t hear a profane perp from me. *thirty seconds later after being touched by something* whaT THE FUCK?!” Person C: “*Bursts out laughing*.” Person A: “We’re going to Hell.”
  • “No, we are not summoning a demon with A Ouija board. That’s, like, step number one of how to get killed by one.”
  • “Oh my God is that a puppy??? Holy shit that’s a puppy. How did a puppy get in here???”
  • “I swear to God if any of these dolls laugh or so much as twitch, I will burn this place to the ground.”
  • “Don’t freak out, but there is a ghost behind you making silly faces at the back of your head.”
  • Person B: “*Trips over a chair*” Person A: “Oh my Got did you just trip over a chair?” Person B: “Why do we have to investigate n the dark?!” Person C: “I caught it all on camera.”
  • “Did you just get startled by a cobweb?”
  • “We’re professionals. *Gets scared by a plank of wood falling* … Completely professional.”
  • Person A: “ SOMETHING JUST PINCHED MY ASS.” Person B:  "The ghost knows a great ass when they see one.“
  • "All of us just screamed like little girls after getting scared by a stray cat we never speak of this again, understood?”


Ellen DeGeneres (Part 2)

Read Part 1 | Requests are open 

You stood up from your seat and turned around to see Harry come out from the corner of the stage with a bouquet of white roses in his hands. His hair was neatly done, three buttons from the top of his black printed shirt undone, and suede boots on his feet. He waved to the audience who were all standing. You were speechless the entire time, your hand stuck over your mouth, eyes wide.

“Oh my God,” you said breathlessly as Harry handed you the bouquet of roses. He bowed his head to place a soft, quick kiss on your lips. “What are you doing here?” You couldn’t believe your eyes. What was he doing there?

Harry spoke low, “Hello, baby.”

“Hello,” you responded, giggling and happy.

Ellen stepped toward the two of you to greet Harry with a hug. “Good to see you,” they said to one another before taking their respective seats. Harry sat beside you on the couch with his legs crossed and one arm around your shoulders while his other hand held yours.

“Did you two plan this?” you asked Ellen; then turned to Harry, “You’re supposed to be leaving for London.”

Harry just chuckled. “Should I go now?”

You gripped his hand tighter, “No. Definitely no.” The audience laughed.

“Harry, what do you have planned in London?” Ellen asked.

“I have a few appointments and bookings in London. I also have a few shows lined up there to promote the album,” he answered her. You felt him intertwine his fingers with yours. He turned to face the audience, “Ellen, you’ve got a great crowd here today.” The audience clapped and cheered at Harry’s comment.

“How did this happen?” you asked Ellen and Harry.

“Harry was the mastermind behind all of this,” Ellen smiled.

“No, no, Ellen helped for sure,” Harry added, sharing the credit. “Today’s our anniversary. I wanted to spend today with you before I fly out.”

“You remembered!” you smiled. You took his face into your hands and kissed his lips. “Happy anniversary,” he whispered. “Happy anniversary,” you whispered back. You turned your attention back on Ellen. “I’ve never had this much public display of affection on my show. We’re rated-G, you know,” she said teasingly. You felt yourself blush, very much embarrassed. You looked to a smiling, confident Harry for reassurance. “Thank you so much for the surprise,” you told Harry and Ellen.

“Happy anniversary, you two,” she said. “So, what are your plans for your anniversary?”

You and Harry exchanged looks at one another. “Well, I’m flying out to London tomorrow. I’ll be there for a couple of weeks. But tonight, I was thinking dinner.”

Ellen raised an eyebrow, “Just dinner?” She scoffed and the audience laughed with her. “What are you eating out– I mean, where are you eating out?”

You and Harry burst out in laughter. “Oh my God,” you said in between laughs, “Ellen.”

Harry tried to compose himself. “I thought you were rated-G.”

Ellen shifted her eyes onto her very entertained audience. “I’m sure our audience, and myself,” she added, “are very curious as to how relationships work in this industry. Are we not?”

“Yes!” the audience shouted in unison.

“How do you make it work?” she asked.

“Lots of planning and adjustments,” you answered. “It’s not easy, especially now, as we’re both getting super busy. But if there’s a will, there’s a way.”

“I’m sure there is,” she responded suggestively. “So I’ve got a gift for the two of you,” she pulled out a box wrapped in shimmering silver wrapping paper with a large bow placed on the top. “Oh wow,” you said, as Ellen handed you the box. “You shouldn’t have. I wonder what’s inside…” You placed the box on the coffee table. Harry scooted forward to watch as you opened the box.

Inside the box, you found a throw pillow with a selfie of Ellen printed on one side and “Happy Anniversary, love Ellen” on the other in cursive writing. “This is great,” Harry laughed as he hugged the pillow. “I love this. We’ll definitely use this.”

“Thank you so much, Ellen,” you added.

“Now Portia and I’s anniversary is August 18th, 2008. We expect something to come in the mail from you two that day,” she stated.

You and Harry both chuckled. “Yes, you can count on that,” you assured her.

“Everyone let’s give everyone a round of applause and a happy anniversary to Y/N and Harry! You all are receiving a pre-ordered copy of Y/N’s new album ‘Walk with Me’. Thank you all. See you tomorrow!” she waved to her audience. You and Harry took a small bow.

You and Harry were in a big, black Escalade with incredibly tinted windows, on your way to an Italian restaurant in Beverly Hills. You were scrolling through you twitter when you noticed something. “Oh my God,” you said.

“What is it, love?” Harry asked, looking over your shoulder.
“We’re trending,” you said, handing him your phone.

You saw a smile spread across Harry’s face. “Hashtag happy anniversary Harry and Y/N,” he read out loud.

Love Like A Comic Book || Peter Parker x Reader

{summary: your friend gives you a worn notebook filled with a drawn comic that depicts you together with spider-man, however, there’s just one problem.

you can’t draw to save your life, and you have no idea who would be crushing on you hard enough to draw you as spider-man’s love interest.}

inspired by Nathaniel Kurtzberg’s character on Miraculous Ladybug. Pls pretend that peter is somewhat artistic for this story.

also, this is dedicated to my dead laptop. RIP bae, you will be missed as I attempt to type all of my future stories on my phone 。゚(TヮT)゚。

warnings: none

OC mention: David “Dave” Pennington: [Name’s] best friend

[author’s note: okay so Dave has been a long time OC of mine, and admittedly, I drew inspiration from Dave Strider in personality and appearance. However, just to make this a bit more fun, you readers can also picture David Pennington as looking like Harrison Osterfield ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) ]

**dont repost/plagiarize this story**


{As she talked to her friend,/ that smile of hers looked so sweet,/ Her form was like the heroine of a comic I drew in my head/ It was love at first sight/ I truly, truly came to like her/ But with the way I look,/ She would definitely hate me.}

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Pickup Lines- Carter Hart

Originally posted by nr1nuggetslover

Ok guys so this the first one in a while I’m happy with! I really hope you guys like this one! I’ve got nothing else so… enjoy!

Warning: cheesy pick-up lines (all clean though), one cuss word

Anon Request: Hey i know you have many imagines coming and i REALLY look forward to Reading them, but When you have time could you do One where Carter hart uses some Really shitty pickup line on you but its cute and stuff :)


              “Are you a magician?”

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So Old

You’re nervous about meeting his, friends? You’re not sure what to call them since they’re more family than friends but they also all work together. That makes them co-workers so they must be co-friends-family.
Whatever. They’re the most important people in his life and you need to make a good impression. You’re head over heels for Tony Stark. He’s charming, sarcastic, a little bit of a walking disaster but you’re completely smitten. You’ve been playing with the edge of your black skirt since you got into the car.
“Baby.” Tony says gently, “They’re going to love you.”
“I think I’m going to vomit.” You groan dropping your head into your hands. Tony laughs and pulls at one of your hands, weaving his fingers through yours he brings one to his lips and presses a kiss there.
“Come on sweetheart.” You hadn’t even noticed the car had stopped. He climbs out then and you do the same, meeting him halfway around the car you anxiously grip his arm, sliding your fingers between his. You follow him into the large facility and onto an elevator. He wraps his arms around your waist and pulls your back flush against his front. “Relax baby.” He mutters before pressing a kiss to the swoop of your neck and shoulder. You drop your head back against his chest and close your eyes, taking a deep breath you force yourself to chill out. They’re just people. The doors slide open and you stay where you are, taking one final calling breath.
“Okay, lets do this.” You lead him out of the elevator, shoulders square and head held high.
“That’s my girl.” He smiles over at you before calling to the three men in the room. “Steve! Bucky! Thor! I’ve got someone I want you to meet.” The three men stand and they’re huge. “This is my girlfriend.”
“Finally. He hasn’t shut the hell up about you for weeks. I’m Bucky.” The metal armed brunette reaches out with a smile.
“He’s literally a hundred years old.” Tony whispers loudly and Bucky rolls his eyes.
“Yea but you won’t look this good at a hundred.” Bucky teases back.
“I’m Steve.” The blue eyed, short haired man tells you with a wave.
“He’s 99.”
“I am Thor.” The last man tells you.
“And how old is Thor?” You ask Tony with a grin.
“Over 1000.”
“Are the rest of the Avengers all so old?” You blurt out, wide eyed. Tony bursts out laughing as you slap a hand over your mouth. “Oh my god. I’m so sorry! I didn’t mean it like it came out!” None of the three look offended, quite the opposite actually, Steve has a wide grin on his face. Bucky is watching Tony howl with laughter with a raised brow and Thor is chuckling.
“Oh god babe.” Tony pants, “I fucking love you.” You stare at him in surprise, he’s never told you he loves you before, “Oh that was amazing. But no, most of the team is much younger.” His eyes meet yours and his forehead crinkles in confusion. “What’s wrong?”
“You love me?”
“Hell yes I do.” He says pulling you to him and planting a kiss on your mouth.
“Awwwww.” The three men chorus and you pull away from him with a small smirk.
“I know it’s been a while since you guys have gotten any action but this is called kissing.” You tease and they pretend to be wounded for a second before Steve pulls the other two away.
“She’s a perfect match for you Stark. Don’t fuck it up.” He says before following Bucky and Thor out of the room.
“You gonna fuck it up Stark?”
“Not a chance babe.”

❝ How are babies made? ❞

Plot: Jimin dating a young kinder garden teacher who is pregnant with his kid. At school Y/N is called out for second and while she’s gone he teaches the kids how babies are made. But once he’s home he has a private lesson on how babies are made. 

Pairing: JiminxReader 

Words count: 1,3k+

Genre: Fluff, Slightly smut. 

For anon, I hope you like it! - M. 

Gif isn’t mine, credits to the owner! ♥

“Y/N, can you step outside for a moment?”  

Your coworker’s voice reached you from the door so smiling you nodded slowly, going to the door.  

But a hand is squeezed, gently, around your wrist and you was forced to turn around. The frightened look on your boyfriend provoked you an amused smirk and shot him a little kiss onto his cheek.  

“Good luck Jimin” You hummed to him into his ear, freeing up your wrist and leaving him alone.  

With a class of 25 children of six years.  

*Jimin’s pov*  

The looks of all children were fixated on you and your embarrassment was growing by the minute. What could you do? You had completely no idea but it was when one of them, with a strange look, raised his hand that you realized that had reached the end of you.  


“I’M YOUNG FOR THAT TERM! Call me … Jimin-ah, okay? ”  


“Tell me kiddo”. Your fear grew and you couldn’t escape because Y/N was not there to save you.  

“Do you know how to make a baby?” He asked innocently, as you chocked with your own saliva.  

All the children applauded that question and you asked to yourself how did your girlfriend to survive that hell.  

“Ehm…. ” you began to say but the awkwardness won over you, provoking you a glut of giggles.  

“HYUNG!!” Exclaimed one child, making you back to reality.  

“Right.. Then… In practice… It happens when two people love each other. ”  

“Then I and YooJee will have any kids? Because I love her so much. ”  A long haired child asked almost frightened, set upon unprepared.  

You were speechless, while the kids began to scream in fear. That wasn’t the reaction you wanted to provoke but didn’t even know how to fix the situation.  


“Children, seated and quiet.”  

The voice of Y/N saved you in extremis and you’d never been so happy to see her in your life.  


“Jimin could have answer anything…” You said to your boyfriend while you entered at home and peace welcomed with gentleness.  

A little sigh of happiness ran away from your lips when he hugged you from behind, resting his Chin on your shoulder and pulling the bag off your shoulder.

“Sorry.. You left me alone and I panicked. ”  

“In seven months we have ours… I think most of that antenatal courses serve to you instead of me ”  

Jimin snorted pretending to be offended, by surrounding your hips with his arms and placing his hands on your belly. The idea that in less than seven months a little Jimin would be in your arms filled you with joy.  

“The speech with our son is on you.”  

“Or daughter.”  

“Oh, God, if it’s a girl I will be even more panicked. My Princess… the big sex talk in her thirty years. ”  

You burst out laughing, leaning your back against his chest and enjoying that moment of peace between you two.  

“Maybe..” He proposed resting his lips onto your jaw.  

“Miss, I have some doubts about how babies are made.”  He Whispered on your skin, biting your jaw plan and stroking that flap of skin with the tip of his tongue.  


“Tell me..”  

“Do you know that my hormones are going crazy…?”  

“All the better for me. I think we need an anatomy lesson, what do you say? ” He Murmured huskily, his voice even veiled by a desire. Slowly he peeled off your jacket, by dropping it on the ground, starting then to unbutton your blouse continuing meanwhile to tap with mouth and tongue your jawline.  

“Then Jimin… How are babies made? ”  

“First…” He began to murmur, turning you towards him; “We have to undress.”

“Right.” You agreed with his words, stroking his shoulders and sliding your hands you grabbed the flaps of his Jersey. You began to lift it and after a few seconds, it was on the floor with your jacket.  

His hands were gentle on you and after a few minutes, both were in underwear. Your breath was already accelerated and the pleasure hit you in waves, pleasure increased because of the hormones caused by the pregnancy.  

He clasped a hand on your hip, moving you to himself and began to stroke the curve of your back. Slowly he brushed your skin, starting to caress your bra which was dropped in less than a few seconds.  

His breathing was fast and broken as much as your and his fingers were shaking as you took off your bra, freeing your breasts already slightly larger than normal.  

“God… I love this thing. ” He murmured, bowing and clutching one of your breasts into his hands began with his tongue to lick your nipple. A moan escaped your lips as he continued to lick and bite the nipple.  


“Sh Baby…. Let’s move on to the second step, shall we? ” He asked, finally freeing the nipple from his torture. He Got up and your eyes met, full of lust and desire.  

His hand slipped on your belly and then between your thighs.  

You were already wet because of his quickened breathing and his voice hoarse, but when with his thumb began to caress your clit you exploded completely, making your legs tremble.  

“Babe.. This is the second step. "He whispered, his voice full malice, pushing you against the wall.  

You leaned your back against the wall, over a bump just for the cold sensation that it provoked, having to lower your gaze because he was already kneeling in front of you.  

He began to kiss your belly as he continued with his thumb to stroke your clit, provoking twinges of pleasure right to your core. His tongue stood for a few moments on your belly button and now you couldn’t control your moans, struggling under his touch.  

"I can’t… I c-can’t imagine the last s-step. ”  

“Among all, it’s my favorite.. But it’s early for that. ”  

you closed your eyes, resting a hand on your mouth to keep you from shouting his name and beg him to go directly to the “third step”.  

Finally, his lips leaned on your clit and with the tip of his tongue, he started to jingle your most sensitive and increasingly intense pangs of pleasure made you tremble and moan even more deeply.  

He licked his forefinger, you could not see him but the sounds were well clear, and slipped it slowly inside you.  


“God, you’re so wet.” He cursed full of pleasure, starting to move his finger between your walls, while now you were in the total mercy of excitement and his attentions. “I love when it takes you so little to get excited,”  he added and you closed your thighs with a dry gesture, forcing him to move away and lift his gaze to you.  

“What baby?”  

“Or you go directly to the third step or I can’t do Jimin. I’m already at my limit. ”

“Okay babe, maybe I must teach you how to make kids.”

The slap

Sorry @katiezerk for being late here you go, hope you like it.


WARNING : none

Y/N pov

“Yo what’s up guys and welcome to reacting to sidemen vines. And today I’m with JJ, Calfreezy and our new special guest…Y/N!” Simon did his intro, moving his arms and introducing us.

“Hi” I smile awkwardly towards the camera while the guys are cackling in the background. I look down knowing that i’ve made a fool of myself again. It’s not my fault I am not really comfortable with all of this. Simon starts the vines compilation and we soon hear the intro of the video, the boys dancing to the music trying to be in sync with the beat.

“STOP DABBING IT’S 2017!” JJ screamed, making Cal push him off of his chair earning our laugh. The vines were quite funny and many jokes were made. I even got more comfortable as we recorded the video.

“OH MY GOD” Cal laughed. “This is the best thing” he said when a vine showed the times when Simon got slapped at their Brighton meeting event. We were all laughing until JJ said that we should do the same game all over again, play rocket, paper, scissors and the winner gets to slap Simon. Simon disagreed and went on about how this isn’t our choice to make and how this is his channel and how he did not give consent but JJ ignored him and said that he’ll begin.

"Unless you’re PUSSY, HUH!? Yeah that put you off.” JJ said. I bursted out in laught while JJ moved his chair beside Simon to play. “Ching chang wolla!” “No, wait man you’re cheating!” JJ said. “No you’re just mad you lost that’s it! Stop complaining!” Simon tackled JJ on the floor. “This video is a mess, and I thought it’ll be original to add a game in it but no. GUYS!” Cal screamed at the fit of giggles on the floor that is Jide and Simon. “Not that his channel is original” I laughed and high fived Callum. Let’s just say that Simon’s face was priceless. Cal lost his go too and soon it was my turn. “Bring it on Britney” I gave him a weird look and pushed him.

He couldn’t believe it, I mean he was kinda embarrassed because he is considered as the king of Rock Paper Scissors but I was finally beating him at his own game and I won. “Just do it” He said while looking down, anticipating the pain. I slapped him, I think a bit too hard, but it got a great laugh from the guys. But what happened next scared the devil out of me. “That’s for saying that my channel is not original” said Simon as he slapped me. Couple of “ooos” were heard while me and Simon kept smiling at each other like crazy people.


Pairing: Jared Kleinman x reader

Words: 365

Warnings: None?

Requested by anonymous: could you write prompt 714 with jared?

Prompt: 714. “Wait a minute… Are you jealous?”

A/N: Today was pretty shit but I said i’d upload yesterday so i hope it’s decent enough??? I’ll upload more today that’ll be better to make up for this ugh it’s just so short but I have no more ideas i’m sorry ((I also added BMC because i’m trash rip sorry))

Cool air blew against you and Michael as the two of you chat idly in the courtyard of your school. You’d been close friends for a long time, knowing each other for 7 years.

In the middle of your conversation, you noticed Michael staring at something behind.

“What?” You wondered, still looking at him.

“Isn’t that Jared Kleinman over there?” Swiftly, you spun around, spotting Jared looking at the two of you from across the small courtyard.

“Yeah, he’s cool.” You muttered, a slight smile spreading on your face.

“But why’s he staring at us?” Michael inquired, confused.

“Huh. I’ll go ask.” You jumped up, noticing his gaze quickly swift in the opposite direction.

“What’s up?” It took him a moment to turn back around, cheeks flushed.

“Hey, uh, nothing.” He muttered casually, resting his head on his hand.

“Soooo why were you staring at me and Michael?” A laugh almost escaped you when you saw him tense up the slightest bit.

“I don’t know.” He shrugged. “You two looked cute together, I guess.”

Suddenly, you burst out laughing. Jared thought you were dating Michael!

“What?” His voice cut you out of your own disbelief.

“Jared,” You stopped, calming down a bit. “Michael’s gay.”

“Oh.” Was all that came from him.

You began laughing more when Jared’s face reddened once more, then realization hit you.

“Wait a minute… Were you jealous?” You were awestruck.

He sat there, frozen for moment before speaking up quietly.


“You were! Oh my god, you were jealous of Michael!” You hadn’t realized how loud you had been until Jared shushed you, redder than ever before.

Quickly you turned to see Michael, who overheard the whole conversation, doubling over laughing.

How Do You Forget?

okay so here’s my take on something that has most definitely been written before and will be written again.

it’s an au, obviously, where jd and veronica are in college and together and happy. 

once again this is dedicated to the wonderful @jdronica bc i love her blog, she has given me so much inspiration and i need to stop right here or i’ll be going on all night.

thanks/blame to @gender-lessgoon for encouraging me. dammit woman this is all your fault.

i hope you guys enjoy this one as much as you did the last! i’m churning em out while i’ve got the motivation and ideas so… yeah, enjoy! (even though the beginning is rushed and it’s literally so short and once again unedited why do i keep doing this to you guys i am very sorry)

Originally posted by deadblogwalking


Veronica groaned as her alarm went off, rolling out of bed and padding to the bathroom as she wrapped her robe around herself, wiping her eyes and yawning as she started her day.

As she washed her hands, staring at her reflection, she noted a hickey on her collarbone and rolled her eyes. She loved her boyfriend, she really did, but JD could be a little…enthusiastic.

She made her way back into the bedroom, feeling her heart melt a little as it did every time she saw JD asleep. He was just too damn cute, she thought.

“Hey, you, wake up!” she said loudly, and JD grumbled faintly and burrowed deeper into the mattress. Veronica rolled her eyes again and pulled the covers off him.

“JD, it’s time to get up,” she said mock-sternly, and he rolled over to squint at her with betrayal written all over his face.

“Why must you hurt me in this way?” he croaked, and Veronica’s heart jumped at the gravel in his voice.

“I’m gonna do my makeup and then make eggs and bacon,” she told him, tossing his robe on top of him.

As she turned away, he grabbed her wrist and pulled her down onto the bed as she squeaked in surprise. He nuzzled his face into her neck.

“Don’t get up yet,” he murmured. “Stay with me.”

“JD,” she sighed, pushing him away, “you know I’d love to, but we’ve got class at nine, and it’s seven thirty. We need to get ready.”

He grumbled again as she shoved herself up off the bed once more.

“Okay, but consider this-we could just not go,” he said, and Veronica sighed.

“JD, I’ve missed class five times in two weeks because of you,” she said, walking back to the bathroom to brush her hair and do a little makeup.

She heard him get up, and then he was behind her, wrapping his arms around her waist and resting his chin on her shoulder.

“I thought I provided an enjoyable alternative to academia,” he mumbled, and she chuckled, leaning forward to brush mascara onto her lashes. JD held very still, knowing that distracting her now was a supremely bad idea.

“Yes,” she hummed, finishing and leaning back into his chest to survey the results, “but you know as well as I do that we both need a good grade.”

JD sighed and lightly kissed her neck before he released her and went to go get dressed.


Veronica only burned the eggs a little, which she counted as a success, though JD sighed at her.

“Hey, you want unburned eggs, you get up and make them yourself,” she told him archly, and he rolled his eyes and sat at the table.

Breakfast passed in relative peace and quiet until JD spoke up.

“I’m thinking a spring wedding,” JD mused, “or maybe fall. Don’t want it to be too cold though.”

Veronica blinked at him and laughed.

“Babe, we’re not even engaged yet,” she informed him, taking another bite of her eggs.

He froze, looking at her with wide eyes, fork full of eggs halfway to his mouth. She wrinkled her nose at him and swallowed her mouthful, taking a drink of her milk before she raised an eyebrow at him as he slowly lowered the fork.

“So that’s what I forgot to do last night,” JD said eventually, shock and horror coloring his tone, and Veronica couldn’t help herself.

“Oh my God,” she choked, trying valiantly not to laugh. JD’s gaze dropped to his plate, and Veronica couldn’t hold it in anymore.

She burst out into helpless giggles, which quickly turned into a full on belly laugh as JD pouted.

“Don’t laugh at me,” he whined, and she pressed a hand to her mouth as her shoulders shook.

“I’m so sorry,” she gasped, “but love, how do you forget to propose?”

JD’s cheeks flushed, and Veronica’s heart stuttered slightly as butterflies erupted in her stomach, even after years of being together.

He stood abruptly, leaving Veronica at the table alone. Her forehead creased as she stood to follow him, but before she could, he was entering the kitchen once more, this time holding a small black velvet box that Veronica instantly recognized for what it was. Her hands flew to her mouth as he dropped to one knee.

“Look, I know it’s not romantic, and we’re literally in the middle of breakfast, but…ugh,” JD groaned, cheeks still flushed as Veronica’s eyes began to well up with tears. “I love you, Veronica Sawyer, and…I want you in my life, for the rest of my life. I want you to be mine, officially, forever. So, will you marry me?”

“Oh, my God, you idiot,” Veronica breathed, and dropped to her knees, throwing her arms around his neck and kissing him with a force that knocked them both to the floor.

When they parted, Veronica laughed breathlessly.

“Sorry for knocking you over. Jason Dean, I’d be honored to be your wife.”

JD’s grin knocked the breath out of Veronica again just as she had begun to catch it, and she leaned down to kiss him once more, eggs forgotten and growing cold on the table.

They were late to class, and Veronica had to wear a scarf for almost a week, but they were engaged, and to her, it was worth it.


“So, spring or fall?”

“Definitely spring. The flowers will be blooming.”

“Yeah, but come on, they aren’t gonna be able to hold a candle to you.”

“JD, come here and let me kiss you.”

“Your wish is my command.”

until you’re better.

based on this writing prompt.

a/n: hi! useless author’s note here, but this is my first riverdale imagine so I do hope you all cut me some slack. here’s juggie <3 i really hope im playing him right. please do correct me if i wrote something wrong !!

Ship: JugheadxReader

Words: 883 (i’m sorry it’s so short i jsut wanted to write something)


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Chris&Eva- “MOM!”

Chris had came over, like he always does on Saturdays, thats when he gets in one of his moods.. Surprisingly, he is more moodier then me, although you can practically turn him on like a light switch. Anyways, like any other Saturday my mother was off on some business trip with god knows who doing god knows what. That wasn’t on my mind right now. 

Chris’s lips were pressed to mine, his harsh kisses and his cold hands slowly undressing me. He pulled away, his eyes locking with mine, his hands lifting my shirt over my head. He was doing that thing, where he admired. 

“Stop staring, who’s the stalker now?” I snickered a breathy remark, a low chuckle escaping his lips. Our lower halves pressed against each other, still clothed. His hands were running down, starting from my stomach, making his way to my jeans, his fingers now starting to unbuckle.

The door swung open, my body jumped in fear as I hid behind Chris’s upper body. 

“Eva I’m- Oh. I am sorry! Continue! Continue!” My mothers voice rang through my head, my eyes widened and Chris bursts out laughing once he had heard the door close. His eyes clenched shut from laughing so hard, his face a light shade of red.

“Oh my god that is so funny.” Chris said through his histerical laughs. I rolled my eyes. He found this extremely funny. 

“Its not funny! She almost walked in on us fucking!” I said giving his bicep and punch. That only seemed to make him laugh harder. 

“You get to come down and explain with me. How do you like that?” I said raising an eyebrow once he had calmed himself down. 

“I’ll live. I got this.” He said shaking his head, trying to get the giggles out of himself. He got up off my body, putting on his shirt and tossing me mine, doing the same. 

“I swear to god, don’t do anything stupid.” I said pointing my pointer finger at him. He held his hands up in defeat. He smiled at me, and for some odd reason I smiled back. I was mentally praying while we were going down the stairs that he wouldn’t tell my mother straight up ‘we were about to fuck.’ I laughed at the thought of it. 

“Oh you guys didn’t need to stop just because I am here.” I heard my mom speak up when she saw us at the bottom of the stairs. She had a huge smile on her lips, she looked as if she was about to laugh her ass off. 

“MOM!” I said to her, embarrassed, my cheeks probably turning a light pink already. Chris looked back at me with a sly smile and shook his head playfully at me. 

“Mrs. Mohn, I am incredibly sorry you had walked in on that. I didn’t want to meet like this but.. I am Christoffer.” Chris said, his voice somewhat awkward. “Erm, I have had a crush on Eva for a long time, and I guess I wanted to make a move…” He said, clearly pulling that lie out of his ass. 

“Well its nice to meet you Christoffer, its good to know that Eva is interested in someone. I thought she would never get over that boy Jonas.” my mother said with playfulness and a small eye roll.

“Besides that, would you like to stay for dinner Christoffer? We would love to have you.” My mother continued. My eyes widened. She was butting into my love life.

“Why I would love to.” Chris said. I didn’t even have to look at him to know he was wearing that smart ass smirk he always had on his lips. 

This was going to be a long night..



Hi I know this isn’t that good but I tried! Definetly leave more requests babes! :)


anonymous asked:

3 and 129 for Drax please?

Characters: Reader x Drax the Destroyer + Rocket Racoon

Warnings: none

Prompts: 3: “I may be an idiot, but I’m not stupid.” 129: “I’ll give you a massage.”

Word Count: 274

A/N: first Drax request !!

Want to request a drabble? Read this post [x]

You rubbed the back of your neck, closing your eyes as you tried to relax. You had just spent the previous day running around, and now you were all sore. You stretched your arms out as Drax walked into the room, and he tilted his head curiously. 

“What are you doing, y/n?” he asked, and you smiled.

“I just need to stretch out.” you explained. “My whole body is sore.” 

“I’ll give you a massage.” Drax offered, and you shifted to the side to give room for Drax to sit down besides you. He began rubbing your shoulders, and you cringed slightly.

“Be a little more gentle, Drax.” you winced. Drax didn’t seem to acknowledge you, and you cried out a little in pain when he squeezed the back of your neck, hard. “Ow! Not so hard, you idiot.”

“I may be an idiot, but I’m not stupid.” Drax shot back. “I know how to give a massage.”

“Oh my god, Drax.” you yanked away from him, pressing your lips together to stop yourself from laughing. “I think it hurts even more now! Here, turn around, I’ll show you how to actually give a massage.” 

Drax reluctantly turned around, and you began to rub his shoulders. He tilted his head back and made a small murmur of appreciation, and you laughed as Rocket strolled into the room.

“What the hell is going on in here?” he spluttered, surveying the scene. He burst out laughing as you quickly began to blush.

“y/n is giving me a massage.” Drax responded enthusiastically, and Rocket smirked at you as you hid your face in your hands. 

Pass me the controller part 2

Here is the second part of this imagine, I hope you enjoy, this one was certainly a lot more fun to write. Again, let me know if you want to see a part 3 xo


After failing at FIFA for an hour or so and drinking much more than I planned I actually remember why I was there in the first place. I was having so much fun with Jack that I had completely forgotten about all the drama with my ex. It was only when my phone lit up with another phone call from him that I remembered.

“Is that him?” Jack asks, slightly slurrring.

“Yeah just ignore it. He’ll only try giving me all the excuses he can think of but they’re not going to work this time!” My vision is a little blurry and my hand is shaking as I try to flip over my phone. I can’t even remember how much I’ve had to drink.

Before I can react Jack has picked up my phone, “hey jackass.” He shouts. My heart pounds. “If you know what’s good for you then you’re never going to call y/n again. Don’t text her, don’t try and find her, just leave her alone because you’re a fucking douchebag ok!” And with that he hangs up grinning proudly.

“Oh my god.” Is all I can get out.

“That should do the trick”

We both burst out laughing, “I can’t believe you just did that! Thank you!” I throw my arms around him and give him a huge hug. As soon as he wraps his arms around my waist I feel the atmosphere change. He’s nuzzled his head into my neck and his arms are wrapped around my waist.

I don’t know if it’s the alcohol but I swear I feel him smell my hair. I pull away from the embrace, unsure of how to react. His beautiful big blue eyes are staring into mine, trying to read my expression. My mind wanders back to what he was saying earlier about the girl he liked. Surely he wouldn’t hug me like that if there was another girl he was interested. Or maybe I’m just going crazy. 

“I should probably head home.” I mutter, not totally convinced that’s the right this to say. 

“You’re not in any condition to go anywhere y/n." 

"I can’t stay here. I don’t have anything with me" 

"You can have one of my t-shirts and you can sleep in my bed, come on,” he takes me by the hand and pulls me up. My heart flutters at his touch. I can’t believe it. Not only am I falling for Jack but I’m flaking for him when he admits to me he’s in love with another girl. I am such an idiot. 

“No honestly I’m ok. I’ll sleep on the couch maybe” I pull my hand away from him and he looks hurt. 

“Y/n I’m trying to help you. You’re clearly hurting but you can’t be mad at every guy, we’re not all like your ex, especially me, as much as you don’t believe it.” He look on his face is breaking my heart. I’ve gone from hating Jack’s arrogant guts to wanting him to hold me like he did before in a matter of a couple of hours. It’s almost making me feel sick. 
Actually I feel really sick. 

I think I’m going to throw up. 

I run to the bathroom and hear Jack call out after me.
My eyes go white and I start uncontrollably vomiting into the toilet. My eyes water and my face goes bright red. 

“It’s ok, let it out” I think I hear Jack behind me. 

As I come to I realise he’s right next to me, one hand holding my up and the other holding my hair. As I sit up he wipes my face with a towel and finger combs my hair smooth. I’m so embarrassed, “thank you” I manage to get out. 

“Don’t worry about it babe” he holds my face in his hands, “you’re definitely not going anywhere tonight. You look gross.” It takes all the energy I have but I manage to punch him in the arm and he giggles, “come on let’s brush your teeth ” He scoops me up in his arms and carries me through the door way and into the bathroom.

“You don’t have to do this Jack, I can walk” I wriggle out of him arms and immediately fall to the floor. Not only am I still drunk but I am also exhausted from crying and vomiting up he entire contents of my stomach. Great.

“Y/n! Just trust me ok?”

“You’re incredible.” I blurt out. I meant to say that in my head.

“If you can look me in the eye and say that to me again when you’re sober I’ll believe you” he walks over to me with a shirt, “put this on ok? I’ll be back in a minute with some water for you.”

He vanishes from the rooms and I successfully manage to brush my teeth but taking my dress off proves to be a little harder than anticipated due to a ridiculous amount of zips and buttons.

After what feels like an hour of trying to get out of my dress I hear jacks footsteps coming back up the hallway. He laughs as soon as he sees me.

“Help me” I ask pathetically.

He puts the water down, grabs his shirt and comes over. I turn my back to him so he can undo my dress but he hesitates, “it’s not that complicated” I tell him.

“No it’s not that,” his voice almost quivers. I can see in the corner of my eye that his hands are hovering just above my dress. He catches me looking and snaps himself out of whatever he was doing. After two zip and buttons my dress completely falls down before I can catch it.

I feel my cheeks redden again and reach for the shirt in jacks hands but he’s not paying attention. His eyes are fixated on me. Taking in every inch of me in my bra and underwear. His eyes flick to mine and he has a lust in his eyes that I’ve never seen before. He comes towards me, still holding the shirt in his hand. He stands inches from my face and looks from my eyes to my lips back and forth.

I lean in and press my lips on his. It’s like I have no self control. My heart is beating to fast I can barely breathe. He puts his hand to the back of my neck and I feel myself soften. He pulls me in closer, my body against his and kisses me deeper. I let out a little moan as he kisses down my neck, sending chills down my spine. His hands are all over me, touching every inch of my body like it’s the only chance he’ll get. I clumsily try to lift his shift up and thankfully he pulls it over his own head. He’s so much more muscular than I ever knew. He’s so warm and so loving, kissing me all over. He pulls away from my lips for only a moment as he picks me up and carries me to his bedroom, pushing me back onto the bed, crawling on top and locking lips again. Hes messy and rough, leaving marks on my neck and chest. I start to run and the bulge building in his pants. “Y/n” he whispers, almost out of breath. The way he says my name sends me into overdrive, “y/n” he says again, a little more impatient this time. He pulls away from me, “Conor’s home”