oh my god friday

10

My Pathetic But Adorable Big Brother, Hiro: Part I

Older bro!Hiro & Younger bro!Tadashi AU

Prologue Here, Part 2 

AHAHAHAH it finally starts, at a snail’s pace….

Just a movie, babe (S.M. smut)

A/N: Okay i actually got myself aroused while writing oh my gawd! its smutty as fuck. ENJOY!


Shawn’s P.O.V.

I unlock the door and open it, and before I can even get a foot in the door I hear Y/n’s voice yelling.

“Shawn! oh thank god” not a second later i see her running towards the door…towards me terror on her face. I drop my jacket and keys so she can run into my arms. “WHAT! Whats the matter babe!?” I ask, panic in my voice. She wraps her arms around my neck and hold her tighter than i’ve ever held anything in my life. 

“I just watched that movie with that psycho hockey player!” she cried out….her face is still hidden my neck but I let go of her waist. My facial expression instantly changes from anxious to blank. 

“Friday the 13th” I correct her. 

“yeaaah. oh my god i’m so glad you’re home Shawnie i was so scared here alone” she whimpers. “get off of me” I chuckle, backing away from her and picking up the items I dropped a second ago. 

“what? nooo you’re suppose to protect me!” she gasped. “From…Netflix? its just a movie babe” I shake my head and make my way the refrigerator to grab a bottle of water. “for a second there i thought you were a good boyfriend” she pouts while locking the door and walking into the kitchen after me. I look down at her and she rolls her eyes, taking the water bottle from my hands and drinking a sip. “For a second there i thought you were actually in danger. And would a bad boyfriend let you steal their water?” I smirk before taking the bottle back. I take a sip but almost spill some on myself when pokes me in the side.

“jerk! id like to see you sit through a scary movie without feeling the least bit paranoid” she challenged.

“Let’s watch one tonight then”

“Hell no! i’m already freake-”

“I’m here now so I wont let a hockey player or anyone else get my girl” I know she loves it when I call her that. I see her fighting back the smile it always causes. “okay fine but i swear to god if you try to scare me later on i’m going to strangle you” she squints her eyes to try and intimidate me but all it does is make it even harder for me to take her serious. She so short and doe eyed, its really hard for me to be scared of her. 

45 minutes later

“Shawn you’re supposed to be watching this” she giggled pushing my hand away from her thigh. “Id rather be doing this though” I smirk, moving my hand back to her leg and leaving a wet kiss on her collarbone. She sighs with a smile and crosses her arms. “i shouldn’t let you even sit on the same couch as me considering you told me to get off of you earlier” she teased

“haha y/n” I started “but remember what happened before that?”

“You were holding me?” she guessed, looking over at me.

“Yeah. I thought something was wrong and that-….I don’t know” I ran a hand through my hair, reliving that moment when my heart felt like it was going to explode from how fast it was beating.

What would you have done if there was a real killer in here?” she questioned. 

“I usually say violence isn’t the answer but I guess i’d have to kill him” I laugh. I see her eyes turn a bit darker and she took a deep breath. “….did that turn you on or something?” I joke. She doesn’t verbally answer but she guides my hand back to her thigh, and then further up to one of my favorite places on her body. I start rubbing her thought her pajama shorts and judging by how soft she feels right now, i’m one hundred percent positive she isn’t wearing panties. 

She bites her lip and whimpers while pressing my hand harder into her. With her other hand she pulls her shorts to the side and waits for me to do the rest. I rub for a few more seconds to make sure she’s absolutely dripping for me.

I finally have her where I want her and by now she’s almost at her peak. I take two of my fingers and wet them in my mouth before sliding them inside her. Her mouth is hanging open, a look of disbelief on her face. “sh- shawaann” she gasped. I shake my head “I know I know, that was really dirty” I chuckle, still pumping in and out of her.

 “mmm baby you..you’ve never done that…that was h-hot” she struggled through her moans. “fuck” I grunt before pulling away from her and undoing my belt and zipper quicker than I ever have before. Without me having to tell her, she swung a leg over me and pulled her shorts to the side once again. She pulls my hard-on out of my boxers and runs her thumb over the head of it. 

“aahh baby..fuck ride me” I groan

She sinks down on me, the material of her shorts are out of the way but still add some friction every time she comes back down. Her hands find my hair and I can feel my climax building with every stroke. My hands grip her ass and i help move her up and down. “nnh shawnie right there..” she whimpers. I guide her face to my neck and she begins nibbling at my jaw line. She picks up the pace for a second before pulling me out almost all the way. She’s teasing me

“ don’t you fucking stop y/n” I growl in her ear. She starts to grind again but this time, she starts to lose her rhythm. She’s close, so am I.

“i’m almost there baby oooh fuck…yes” she nods at me and i’m assuming she feels the same. Just when I feel her clench around me, I lose it. I throw my head back and squeeze her ass just enough to make her really feel it.

  I’m moaning out her name along with a list of profanities, she’s riding out her high and when I glance down I can see her biting on her finger. I could cum again just watching her. My breathing evens out and even though we’ve both finished, she’s still slowly grinding on me. She leans forward and kisses me with so much passion, it makes me smile. 

I just love her so much.

I grab her waist to stop her movements because my dick is way too sensitive right now. “another go?” she chirps. “give me like 20 minutes babe”

We laugh and she pulls herself off of me, shifting her attention to the tv to catch the last scene of that damn movie.

Former U.S. President Barack Obama holds Jolene Jackinsky’s 6-month-old baby girl while posing for a selfie with the pair at a waiting area on July 3 at Anchorage International Airport, in Anchorage, Alaska. Jackinsky said Obama walked up to her and asked, “Who is this pretty girl?”


(Jolene Jackinsky via AP)

Jolene Jackinsky was at Anchorage International Airport on Monday looking for an airline when she ended up in a waiting area for private flights where a man she thought looked like Obama was sitting.

“As I got closer, I thought: Oh my God, it is Obama,” she recalled Friday from Newhalen, a small Alaska village where she’s vacationing.Obama then walked up to her and asked “Who is this pretty girl?”

They chatted about how fast children grow while Obama carried baby Giselle. Jackinsky took a few photos of a smiling Obama carrying Giselle, who was wearing a straw hat with a white ribbon.

Obama told them he was headed home from a vacation, Jackinsky said.

When Giselle’s father approached, Obama joked, “I’m taking your baby,” Jackinsky said.

SKAM S04E04 Clip 3 - Don’t Judge Me

NOORA: Hey!
SANA: Hi.
NOORA: What is it?
SANA: I’ve done some research.
NOORA: Okay?
SANA: I know how you’re gonna get over William. What are you doing on Friday?
NOORA: What are we going to do?
SANA: You have to wait and see.
NOORA: No! You know what? I don’t like surprises.
SARA: Hi! Did you see my e-mail?
SANA: Yes, but I haven’t had the time to reply. Can’t you just contact Mari about the payment yourself?
SARA: Yeah, but do you have her e-mail so I can send her the contract proposal?
SANA: Nooo.. Noora, do you have it?
NOORA: I think so, maybe. Just check my e-mail.
SANA: What’s your e-mail then?
NOORA: Loglady997.
SANA: Password?
NOORA: exper5. You haven’t..? It’s a totally normal password.
SANA: How do you write it? E, k, s or..?
NOORA: Oh my God.
SANA: E, x or? C?
NOORA: Yeah, just wait, oh my God don’t judge me for my passwords. Here! Just look there.
SANA: What’s her name? Mari Espeflaten?
NOORA: Yes.
SARA: Thanks! I’ll send you a copy.
SANA: Yes. Okay, you’ll join on Friday? Hello! Come on!
NOORA: Oh my God, how stoked are you?
SANA: Yes. I’m stoked for you getting over William, you know? Because I’m a good friend.
NOORA: Yeah, what are we doing then?
SANA: But-
NOORA: Tell me, tell me.
SANA: Are you joining if I tell you what we’re doing?
NOORA: No!
SANA: Come on, or I won’t tell you.
NOORA: Okay, tell me what we’re doing.
SANA: We’re going to a café.
NOORA: We’re going to a café?
SANA: Yes.
NOORA: That’s.. Which one?
SANA: Now you’re asking too much.
NOORA: No, I’m just wondering.
SANA: It has to be a bit of a surprise.
NOORA: But what are we doing at the café? Are we just having a cup of coffee and enjoy ourselves or is something happening, is it like..?
SANA: It’s not dangerous. It’s just a café. You’ll have to wait and see.
NOORA: Oh, you’ve started rhyming too?*
SANA: Yeah, naturally.
NOORA: I’m coming with. No..
SANA: Never speak to me again.
NOORA: Okay..
SANA: Exper55.. What rhymes with that?

[*Sana says some sentences that rhyme in Norwegian.]

Robbie: I’ve seen him going in and out of the toilet all day with that bloody magnifying glass. Just tell me, what have you been looking at? And don’t say dust particles again!
Sportacus: Look, I told you- Ow!
Robbie: All right, is it something to do with your penis? Have you got something wrong with your penis?
Sportacus: My what?
Robbie: Your penis!
Sportacus: Oh, my penis, right, my penis… I was bitten.
Robbie: Bitten? On your penis? Were you bitten on your penis?
Sportacus: Yes! On my penis, my penis, yes.
Trixie: I wish everyone would stop saying penis.
Robbie: Well, bitten by who?!
Sportacus: By a bee.
Stephanie: Bitten by a bee? You mean stung by a bee?
Robbie: So you were stung by a bee, when?
Sportacus: When I was having a wee.
Robbie: You were stung by a bee when you were having a wee?
Sportacus: Yes, I got stung by a bee when I was having a wee.
Trixie: What, in the bathroom?
Sportacus: Of course not in the bathroom! In the garden.
Robbie: What were you doing weeing in the garden?
Sportacus: Having a wee.
Robbie: Do you normally wee in the garden?
Sportacus: No! Only if it’s a nice day…

SKAM Season 4 Episode 4 Clip 3: Don’t judge me

Noora: Hello!

Noora: What is it?

Sana: I’ve done some research

Noora: Okay?

Sana: I know how you’ll get over William. What are you doing on Friday?

Noora: What are we doing now?

Sana: You’ll find out.

Noora: No! You know I don’t like surprises.

Sara: Hi! Did you read my e-mail?

Sana: Uh yeah, but I haven’t had time to reply, but can’t you just contact Mari yourself about payment?

Sara: Yeah, but do you have her mail, so I can send her the contract proposal?

Sana: No, Noora, do you?

Noora: I think, maybe … Just check mine. 

Sana: What’s your e-mail?

Noora: loglady997

Sana: Password?

Noora: exper …

Sana: Huh?

Noora: exper5?

Sana: eksp ..

Noora: exper. Exper5! Haven’t you heard …?

Sana: How do you write … E-K-S?

Noora: Oh my god. 

Sana: With an X or a C or …?

Noora: Wait! Oh my god, don’t judge me. Here, then you can just look at this!

Sana: What’s her name? Mari Aspeflaten?

Sara: Thanks. I’ll attach you to a copy. 

Sana: Yes. *to Noora* OK. But you’ll join on Friday? Oh, come on!

Noora: Oh my god, so geared you are!

Sana: I’m geared on you getting over William. That’s why. I’m a good friend. 

Noora: What are we doing? Say it. Say it. 

Sana: Are you coming if I say it?

Noora: No! Come on. 

Sana: Okay, we’re going on a café.

Noora: Café? That’s … which one?

Sana: Now you’re asking a lot. Some of it has to be a surprise. 

Noora: What are we going to do at the café? Just drink coffee and get cozy?

Sana: It’s nothing dangerous. It’s just … a café. The rest you’ll see.

Noora: And now you’re rhyming too?

Sana: Yes, you’re paying attention!

Noora: I’ll come with … No …

Sana: exper5 … What rhymes with that?

Just Friends? || Dan Howell

A/N: Look! It’s a new dan imagine.Things get kinda hot at the end of this one so I warned you. 

Word Count: 1.3K

POV: Reader

MASTERLIST // PART TWO // PART THREE

Originally posted by leftfringe

Without me noticing it my head sunk down onto Dan’s chest. My eyes had fallen shut half way through the movie. I had fallen asleep not only in my friend’s flat but basically on top of him. Dan didn’t seem to care and drifted off to sleep not much later.

I started going to university half a year ago in a city that was completely different from my home town. It wasn’t easy to make myself a home here and manage all of the new challenges that I had to face. I had a little dorm room for myself and I got homesick and lonely from time to time.

Dan on the other hand had started uni 3 years ago. He already knew how things worked and he shared a nice flat with his best friend Phil. Dan was a friend of my elder brother and we had gotten on well before I moved here. Now that I was all alone in this big city and needed company I found myself hanging out with Dan a lot.

During my first few weeks here he showed me around and took me to his favourite restaurants. Now I was almost always welcome to hang out at his flat.

Today was one of those days. I felt lonely watching TV all by myself in my dorm room and half an hour later me and him were watching a movie on his couch.

I woke up as soon as the light that shone through the curtainless windows became too bright to ignore. The first thing I saw was a black shirt that I had nuzzled my head into. The first thing I smelled was Dan’s cologne. The first thing I noticed was Dan’s hand that was resting on my hip and almost on my bum. He must have slung his arm around me in his sleep.

I tried freeing myself from his grip without waking him up but his eyes shot open as soon as I started moving.

“Sorry.”  I awkwardly laughed and grinned at Dan’s terrible bed hair.

“I shouldn’t sleep till noon everyday anyway.” He told me, shrugging his shoulders.

He was chuckling at my morning voice but then the smile on his face vanished. His eyes grew wide instead as they landed on where his hand was resting on my hip. Dan quickly removed his arm. We had “friend zoned” each other the time we first met. Cuddling on the sofa was definitely something that could cross our friendship boundaries.

For a second we just looked at each other.

Neither of us said something.

“Ah, the cuddle buddies are finally up!” Phil suddenly exclaimed as he entered the living room.

“Shut up.” Dan and I groaned at the same time. I grabbed a pillow from the couch and threw it at him.

“Hey! I’m just telling the truth, Y/N.” Phil grinned while he defensively raised his hands.

“We didn’t even cuddle.” I told him, rolling my eyes.

“Sure, why don’t you check your phones and see for yourselves?”

I quickly glanced at Dan. He seemed to be as confused as me. I was expecting the worst as I unlocked my phone. 50+ messages in my group chat with Dan, Phil, my brother and some of their other friends that I had all met before.

Phil had the audacity to take a picture of us and post it in the group chat.

‘when were you gonna tell us, ;) ?’

‘Dan is getting some’

‘you are after my sister, dude!?’

‘just watching a movie huh?’

‘YO MATE Netflix and chill, imma right?’

I sighed as I read all of the boy’s texts. My brother being one of them. How embarrassing was that?

“How can you live with such a dumbass?” I asked Dan, pointing at his flatmate and best friend. My voice was loud enough for Phil to hear it on purpose.

“It’s all your fault. You were the one who used Dan as a pillow. And Dan literally hugged you tighter than his favourite teddy bear.” Phil chirped teasingly.

I could feel my cheeks heat up. “We’re just friends!” Dan and I shouted at Phil, who knowingly smirked.

After we ate some breakfast together I took the bus back to my dorm. I took my phone out of the pocket of my jeans in order to pass the time. I checked if I got any new messages and remembered the group chat and all of the boy’s texts.

‘You can stop printing your Dan and Y/N shipper shirts! Just friends!’ I typed.

After I sent my witty comment I scrolled up and stumbled over the picture of Dan and I cuddling. My head was nuzzled into his chest and he had his arms wrapped tightly around me. One of my thighs was put onto his. We did look like a cliché ‘relationship goals’ picture.

My heart sank as I caught myself smiling at the photo. I swallowed hard and quickly turned my phone off, leaving me staring at the black screen. ‘just friends, Y/N’ I whispered to myself.


After our cuddle session, nothing extraordinary happed between me and Dan for a while. I just visited him and we hung out together from time to time.

“CHUG IT!”

“No way, Dan.”

“C’MON just this one!”

“OH MY GOD, I CHUGGED IT”

It was a Friday night, Dan and I had just passed a few important exams and we were out to celebrate all evening with a few friends of ours. The two of us had just returned to Dan’s flat and he realised that he still had some left- over vodka. Although we already had a few drinks at the bar he somehow convinced me to drink the shot he had put into my hand.

30 minutes later half of the bottle was empty.

“Ooops” I giggled while I sunk down on the couch next to Dan and put my head onto his shoulder.  

Dan stared down at me, his deep brown eyes were hypnotising. I swallowed hard as I realized how close we were. I noticed how his eyes wandered down to my lips and stayed there.

Dan’s hot breath on my skin made my inside tingle. The desire to kiss him washed over me like a wave and there was nothing else I could think about. My skin started to glow as the unbearable urge to kiss him was just too much.

We quickly closed the gap between us as his lips crashed down on mine. His hands were back on my hips once again as he pulled me closer to him.

‘Oh my god’ I moaned in my head as I wrapped my arms around his neck and pulled myself onto his lap.

I could feel his hands eagerly grab my bum as he leaned back into the pillow of the couch we were sitting on, with me still on top of him.

We broke our hungry kiss to catch our breaths.

“Holy shit, Dan!” I screamed as I realized what had just happened.

We unbelievingly stared at each other with wide eyes.

“Dan we’re drunk.” I whispered.

“We really shouldn’t do this.” Dan gulped.

We were both breathing heavily and I was still on his lap. I breathed in his scent and as I felt his hands on my bum the desire to be as close to him as possible returned.

We glanced at each other intensely before his lips were suddenly back on mine. I buried my fingers in his brown hair, making him moan. His tongue brushed my bottom lip, asking for entrance that I gladly granted him.

We were eagerly making out on his couch, ‘just friends’ was totally forgotten by now. I could feel his hard-on poke the bottom of my thigh and I moaned as I realized how turned on he was by me.

His huge hands started to explore my body, making me gasp as they wandered underneath my shirt and unclasped my bra…

anonymous asked:

Oh my god! That story with SI employees and the Rouge Avengers! I can't stop laughing! Please make that a fic someday! I literally laughed for a good five minutes! You are amazing!

Lmao they finally get sat down at the conference table and they’re juuuust about to begin speaking when Friday says, “Boss, there’s a problem.”

“OH MY GOD!” Steve shouts, nearing the end of his rope.

Tony sighs. “Yes, Friday, what is it?”

“You appear to be sitting with people that have caused you and yours physical harm in the past,” Friday began pleasantly. “It is in my code to protect you.”

“What,” Tony says and then, “Friday,” and then, “No–”

“I am releasing the Battle Bots,” Friday says pleasantly, and then there was a klaxon.

“Ladies and gentlemen,” Tony says, standing. “Fucking book it.

Steve, Sam, Wanda, and Clint hesitate. Natasha is on her feet and out the door almost before he finishes speaking, dragging Scott behind her because just because he didn’t know Tony didn’t mean he should die.

A panel slides open in the wall and then there’s the sound of wheels on the tile.

“That… That’s Dum-E,” Steve says, confused. “Hey, buddy–”

Dum-E makes a horrible screech and bashes into him, smacking him in the head with his fire extinguisher.

“You fool,” Tony says. “Complete and utter.” He looks at Clint. “Dum-E is not the Battle Bots.”

Clint grabs Wanda’s wrist and flees as well.

“Jesus Christ,” Sam says, moving to help Steve up and get him out of the room.

Dum-E waves his fire extinguisher after them, then rolls aside so the bots coming up behind him can zoom out, lasers shining threateningly.

“Don’t hurt my employees,” Tony warns them.

They beep an affirmative before burning rubber to whiz out of the conference room.

Tony watches them go, then walks over to Dum-E and pats his chassis fondly. “Was that revenge enough for you?”

Dum-E waves his fire extinguisher and beeps happily.

Another Morning (Jumin x MC)

You wake up to find Jumin a bit more tired than usual.

Word Count: 610

I feel blessed that it’s Friday oh my god. Anyhow, I’ll be starting Victorian!AU tomorrow, I just wanted to do some regular prompts before I got back to the historical AUs. I hope you like it and have a lovely day!

————————————————————————————————————–

Your eyes fluttered open at the shifting beside you, finding your husband sitting up, a deep puff of air escaping him as he hunched over, rubbing at his face.

Sunlight had dripped into the room, a soft fondness following beside the light as it tapped your skin.

“Good morning,” You murmured, watching as he looked to you to you, instinctively smiling at the sight of you.

“Oh, good morning turtledove.” He hummed. “Did I wake you?”

“No, no it’s no problem.” You waved a small hand comfortingly, leaning up. “Didn’t you take the day off, though? What’re you doing up so early?”

“…It’s a bit of a habit now, I suppose.” He shrugged, hesitating with his words. “If you’re tired, go back to sleep, I won’t mind.”

“I’m fine,” You reassured him, sitting up, catching the dark circles practically engraved beneath his eyes. “Are you? Did you get any sleep…?”

He tipped his head to the side wearily. “Debatable.” 

“What happened?”

“I had quite a bit of last minute paperwork emailed to me from a client. It might as well have been an ecyclopedia it was enormous.” 

He folded his lips, knowing you wouldn’t quite like his next words. “I only finished it about a half hour ago. I started around 1 in the morning.” 

“Jumin!” 

“I’m…I’m fine.” He yawned, attempting to cover his mouth. “I just need to take some espresso shots…that’s what I usually do after all-”

He prepared to get up, yet you grabbed onto his hand, stopping his movements as he stared bewildered at you. 

“Darling, what’s wrong?” 

“You need to get some sleep.” You pulled him back onto the bed, puffing out your cheeks indignantly. “It’s not healthy to get that little of sleep!” 

“It’s nothing new for me love-”

“Would you let me do it then?” 

He sighed, melting as he lay back on the bed beside you, sinking into the sheets and pillow as though he were floating in water.

“Are you sure I can’t get up?” He chuckled lightly, the circles only seeming to deepen as his lids drooped. 

“Absolutely. You need to rest, you know.” 

He grinned sweetly, shifting to his side as he wound his arms about you, pressing a chaste kiss to your forehead. 

“You’re an utter gift do you know that?” 

His voice began to trail, yet still held onto the same tenderness he always had when he talked to you.

“I don’t know what I’d do without you…” He muttered. 

You snickered, twirling his wavy strands of hair through your fingertips. “Everyone needs to be taken care of at some point. Even if they don’t want to admit it.” 

He nodded groggily in response.

“Can I ask you something?” 

“What’s that?” 

“Could you stay with me?” He exclaimed. “Before I met you I was used to sleeping alone but now…I find it…uncomfortable.” He scrunched up his nose, tensing. “It doesn’t feel right when you’re not there is what I mean-”

You buried your head in the crook of his neck, your lips stretching from ear to ear.

“I’d be more than happy to.” 

He let out a breath of relief, holding you as though you were a precious dream he never wanted to let go of.

And he spoke once more, before drifting off beside you.

“…Thank you, darling.”