oh muffin

for their 1-year anniversary (in august, not may, because august was when they became official), after bitty ADAMANTLY insists jack not go overboard with gifts, bitty wakes up alone and wanders into the kitchen to find the counter covered in….well, he isn’t entirely sure. 

bitty can hear the shower running and jack humming to himself, so bitty takes time to examine the objects to neatly lined up:  a jar of honey (local, obvi); a pot of pretty, pink flowers; a sack of sugar; a plate of lumpy muffins; a plastic pumpkin clearly salvaged from some halloween bargain bin; a box of stale sweethearts leftover from valentine’s day; and a plush moose.” 

“well, this certainly didn’t cost as much as a new oven,” bitty muses out loud. “what on earth, jack laurent…”

“nicknames.” bitty looks over his shoulder to see jack toweling off his hair, looking hopeful. “they’re, um. i tried to figure out how to turn monsieur grumpy into an object but nothing worked.”

it clicks after a moment of gaping at his ridiculous boyfriend. “wait, these are- these are all my nicknames for you?” 

“most of ‘em, yeah,” jack says, looking embarrassed now. “i know you didn’t want me spending too much money, but it’s our anniversary so-”

he doesn’t get to finish that sentence, because he suddenly has an armful of bitty. bits squeezes the life out of him for a full minute, then turns to appraise the gifts again. “i get honey, sugar, muffin, pumpkin- oh, sweetheart, funny. and my big, ridiculous moose,” he says, taking jack’s hand. “but the flowers?”

“sweet peas,” jack explains. “It’s- it’s my favorite.” 

“sweet peas,” bitty repeats, burying his face in jack’s arm. “you’re wonderful, honey.” 

“happy anniversary,” jack says softly, kissing the top of bitty’s head. “love you. and your nicknames. but mostly you.”

Bad Muffin Puns | 17.08.17
  • Dan: There were lots of snacks. There were muffins and there were not many muffins left.
  • Phil: Yeah.
  • Dan: There were what? Two muffins left. So I was like "can I have one of these muffins please?" and for some reason this barista was like... he was fully zazzed.
  • Phil: He was so zazzed!
  • Dan: Enthusiastic guy, it was like...
  • Phil: I don't know why.
  • Dan: It with verve spinning around making coffees. And he went "oh, really? Another muffin? These are so muffIN right now." And we were like *ha*.
  • Phil: I did a little snort.
  • Dan: Nice pun because they must have been popular or whatever. So me wanting to pun back -
  • Phil: Trying to be the pun master!
  • Dan: - I went "mm, yeah, just get muffINSIDE me." The muffin.
  • Phil: No, I literally -
  • Dan: Obviously...
  • Phil: - walked away.
  • Dan: Obviously, the muffin! Are you kidding me?
  • Phil: *incredibly fond laughter* That was enough for me to walk away.
  • Dan: Right, right. Okay, he made that joke and I went "get muffINSIDE" and I almost did like finger guns but I gave him that look like "we did a..".
  • Phil: We did a moment.
  • Dan: He just went like *confused face* and then turned around and then the person up was like "what did you order? How much was that?" and he was just off making a drink.
  • Phil: I don't blame him for turning around, Dan. ♫Turn around, Nero man♫
  • Dan: Who-who would make a pun and then not understand the following thing?
  • Phil: I know. Some people just aren't ready to go to the pun activity.
  • Dan: Whatever, so that's me. There's why I don't go outside.
  • Phil: But then as I walked away, that actually meant Dan bought my cookie, so thanks for that.
  • Dan: I did, yeah, I forgot that.
  • Phil: Yeah, it was a good cookie.
  • Dan: Give me two pounds.
  • Phil: Noooo...
Promises (Smut)


Request: Can you do a smut where Shawns on tour and him and his girlfriend traditionally have post-concert sex but she hasn’t been with him for the last few concerts so she surprises him after a concert and they have rough/passionate sex in the dressing room

Word count: 2,825

Promises (Smut) 

“Hey Geoff, it’s y/n” I said, after pressing on Geoff’s number on my phone.

“Hey, did you land already?”

“Yes, I’m on my way to the venue now, I’ll take a couple hours though”

“It’s fine, you’ll surprise Shawn after the concert” Geoff told me, which made me smile widely.

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Movie Time

Word Count: 506
Warning content: the reader is implied to have depression. I know not everyone has the ~same~ kind of depression, so I based it around things that I have personally done myself. So, sorry if you can’t entirely relate. ^^;

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