I really, really hate jokes that degrade men. I don’t think they’re funny at all, even when they’re meant to be lighthearted and “not a big deal,” and especially when every woman in the room is expected to laugh out of some kind of twisted solidarity.
Today at work one of the volunteers asked me how many pets I have, and I told her I have two dogs. She responded by asking me “Are you sure you don’t have three? What about your husband?” She was pretty pleased with herself. I wanted to say “Oh well I don’t have one of those, but if I did he would be my best friend and my partner, someone whom I respect and love deeply, so I wouldn’t be comparing him to a dog or making a cheap joke at his expense.”
The thing is, the more identify with feminism, the more I feel this way. I can’t understand how feminism becomes associated with man-hating because even though I know it sometimes goes that way, it’s been the exact opposite for me. It’s made me a lover of humans. As much as I want to celebrate and fight for women, I also want to celebrate and fight for men. As much as I don’t want to hear women belittled, I don’t want to hear anyone belittled. Because everyone is so valuable. And people are so much more than their gender.