So, I saw Sausage Party today.
And I have to say…
You’re all a bunch of stupid pieces of shit.
“Wah, this movie has racial stereotypes! Dat’s not allowed!”
“Wah, this lesbian mexican taco is a taco, and taco means lesbian in my head! U can’t call a lesbian a taco! Dat’s not allowed!”
“Hurr durr dis cringey fedora neckbeard atheist made fun of religion, dat’s a fink to mock and laugh at. Duhuhuhuh! He doesn’t know! Dat’s not allowed!”
“This movie mocks the Jews VS Muslims war thingy and suggests they live in the same place instead of fighting, AND mocks their 72 virgin heaven! Dat’s not allowed!”
“This movie contains nazi jokes! Dat’s not allowed!”
“Dis movie has a bottle of firewater and it’s native american! U CAN’T HAVE NATIVE AMERICAN PEOPLE ACT STEREOTYPICALLY! REEEEEEEEEEEE! Also, dat’s not allowed!
"Wah, this movie contains an orgy sequence between food! I’m not emotionally prepared for sex! But food getting chopped up and murdered onscreen is a-ok, I won’t spend more than a sentence or two talking about that unless I’m wanking over how much I dislike violence. Anyway, wah! Food has sex! Dat’s not allowed!”
This movie is satire that mocks religion and how it keeps cultures separate. This movie is satire that mocks religion for what it is, a lie to keep people stupid. This movie doesn’t do things cleverly because it knows the average person isn’t intelligent to understand anything smarter than “Oh hey dat’s a reference to a comic the wiki can explain for me!”.
When Blazing Saddles came out, the scene with farting cowboys was considered shocking. People mocked them for being edgy. Bitches said “Yes, you can make whatever story you want, but I don’t like fart jokes, so it’s a bad film and you should change it! Fart jokes? Dat’s not allowed!”
Despite believing you’re a Precious Smoll Babs™ or Enlightened Egalitarian or whatever stupid label you wrote up and slapped onto your forehead, you are not progressive or norm critical or intelligent, you are on the moral level of scared old women crying because a scene with farting cowboys triggered them. You don’t realize how pathetic you look, and that just makes you look worse. And no, posting “Lol im trash im a potato” doesn’t count, you idiot.
Have you ever heard the old saying, “When a wise man points, a fool looks at the finger”? That’s you. You’re the fool, staring intently at the finger and crying about how unclean it is.
Seth Rogen managed to take a premise that sounded retarded, and he made it into a film about how we should throw religion into the trash where it belongs, love one another, fight back against the “Gods”. Instead of the ham-handed anti-religion stuff you’d expect from the genre, he showed the effects of religion, how even the most clear messages of peace are distorted into “Our race is better than yours, our religion said so” by religion’s infectious stupidity, how the divide between those that find new evidence that disproves their beliefs and recoil like bitches and dig their heels in like mules and those that want to know more can tear relationships apart… Hell, it even threw in a nice little “Simply disproving your beliefs with evidence you don’t want to accept is TOTALLY the mean option, you have to sugarcoat harsh truths so they can be swallowed by even mental toddlers” bonus for you, whether you noticed in your triggered little pseudo-panic attack bitch-seizure or not.
Also, check out the ending. Everyone lives in peace and harmony and sex, throwing away racism and homophobia. You’d think SJWs would love an ending like that, but you’d only think that if you somehow hadn’t yet noticed that SJWs only say they want X or Y, what they actually want is power, validation, something to blame their failings on, and the rush of feeling offended. If that sounds crazy to you, congrats. Now look up the facts BEFORE responding, so you don’t embarass yourself.
To everyone that once filled this site with whiny, impotent, virtue-signalling and utterly pathetic bitching: Congratulations on being too fucking stupid to properly understand a SETH ROGEN STONER COMEDY ABOUT TALKING FUCKING FOOD.
>Inb4 some dumb fuck, in their desperate desire to avoid digesting what I wrote, laughs it off with something along the lines of “Hurr durr this pony ask blog is serving up truth lol what even is 2016”.
>Inb4 some incurably-divorced-from-reality SJW goes “But da movie has racial stereotypes in it! Dat’s not allowed!”.