oh hey perfection in a post

Things the Hogwarts Houses say

(loosely based on conversations I’ve had/overheard)

Hufflepuff -

  • “If you don’t start singing along to High School Musical with me in under 30 seconds you will no longer be my best friend" 
  •  "I swear on my chicken nuggets-”
  • “Yes I made that joke up by my self - no it’s not from Spongebob Squarepants how dARE YOU-”
  • “Speaking of Spongebob can we just take a few moments to discuss how much of a masterpiece that first movie was please”
  • “Ah yes, it’s 3 in the morning, time to get emotional and tell all my friends how much I love them”
  • “You made me chocolate??? Oh my God I love you so much thank you I’ll have some right no - THIS HAS RAISINS IN IT YOU TRICKED ME
  • “Oh my God yeah I saw that movie, my favourite part was when - oh shit wait there’s this adorable kitten video I meant to show you last week and I completely forgot let me get it up on my phone”
  • “Sorry I’m late I was up all night watching those videos where kids get surprised with puppies”
  • “Are you awake? Great, let’s start planning our future homes together, I have a pinterest board ready”
  • “This is my favourite photo album! It’s full of photos of all the cats and dogs I’ve made friends with on my walks, I’ve even given them all names”
  • (crying) “Stop calling me emotional God damn it”

Ravenclaw -

  •  "Of course I remember you said you liked the colour red, you told me at like 1:35 am last year in May"
  • “What? Simplifying equations? No, I can’t help with that but I do know all the words to every Simpsons episode in the first 5 seasons if that helps"
  • “Sorry I really can’t go out today. No I’m fine, I’m just stressed I’m doing something important. I’m trying to memorise all the words to this documentary about frogs - What? Yes of course it’s important!”
  • “I discovered and fully analysed that meme 3 weeks ago, step up your game”
  • “What do you mean why do I have a folder full of strategic plans on how to succeed at animal crossing, that’s not weird?”
  • “Sir, I don’t mean to be rude but I’ve been doing my own research and you’re getting all of this wrong. Well yes I know I’m not the teacher here but - Yes, actually, I’d love to teach the class my self I’ve already made a lesson plan, thank you”
  • No, I won’t come and see Jurassic World with you. Because it’s completely unrealistic! Do you have any idea what dinosaurs are actually supposed to have sounded and looked like? Even adult velociraptors weren’t meant to be that b - OK you know what, I will come, but I’ll be pointing out every single problem to you. No, it’s too late, you already invited me. I’m buying our tickets right now, don’t move”
  • “You really think you can beat me at Mario Kart? I have spent YEARS studying this game and honing my skills, spending hours upon hours training until my hands cramp and even my tv is judging the amount of time I’ve spent playing and you think YOU can beat me? Let’s fucking go
  • “I think these guys think I want to murder them because I followed them home but it’s only because I overheard them talking about what would happen if Pokemon is real and I wanted to see how good their logic was”
  • “Shut up? Shut up? I haven’t shut up for 17 years and I’m not about to start now”
  • (crying) "I just want Shakespeare’s ghost to be proud of me”

Gryffindor - 

  • “I’d love to have a sleepover but it can only be when there’s a thunderstorm so we can dance in the rain, let me check the weather forecast”
  • “Did that bee just try and sting you? COME BACK HERE BEE YOU COWARD I’M GONNA FUCK YOU UP - wait shit no run”
  • "What did you say? Don’t touch it? Alright.” (touches it as soon as the person turns away) “Sucker”
  • “Whaaat? Someone wrote on the desk? No it wasn’t me I would never do th - My name was there? Well, I’m not the only one in the world with my na - My surname was there too? What are the chances?!”
  • “Help me I started saying lmao ironically and I can’t stop”
  • “Before you say anything it wasn’t me - unless it was something awesome then I definitely planned the whole thing”
  • Excuse me? They said what to you? … I have to go for a second, I just remembered something completely unrelated. No, no, I’m not taking this fork with me for any particular reason”
  • “Um, did you just tell me it’s impossible to sing along to a guitar solo? Stand back. Your mind is about to get blown”
  • “I am so not drunk! I’m completely drunk! … Wait shit I meant sober”
  • “I’M SO PROUD OF YOU AAAH LET ME HUG YOU! I’M NOT LETTING GO FOR THE NEXT 3 HOURS, GET COMFORTABLE BITCH”
  • “I bet I can stay up for longer than you - what no I’m not tired shut up - nO THAT WASN’T A YAWN I WAS JUST SHOWING YOU WHAT IT WOULD LOOK LIKE IF I WAS TIRED - SEE I DID IT AGAIN TOTALLY ON PURPO - ok fuck you I’m going to sleep”

Slytherin - 

  • “Oh my God, just tell me what you did already so I can start complaining”
  • “Sorry, I didn’t catch that. Did you say STOP saying fuck, or KEEP ON saying fuck?”
  • “Over your dead body? I was hoping you’d say that”
  • “If you even LOOK at them one more time I will take a stick as big as your ego and stick it right up your-”
  • “Don’t come near me or - OK fine, we can snuggle for exactly 15 minutes. I’m setting a timer now”
  • “Hey, I saw you posted a picture of us on instagram yesterday where my eyeliner isn’t completely straight? You’re gonna have to delete that, if anyone thinks my eyeliner isn’t drop dead perfect every day and that I’m not a literal make up goddess I’ll lose my reputation as the Regina George of the school”
  • “But keep the one where I’m wearing no make up so that all those bitches know I still kill it without trying”
  • “Oh come on, you know I’d never do anything to embarrass you! Speaking of which, that video I posted on youtube the other day of you falling down the flight of escalators in the shopping centre has reached over 1000 views”
  • “My dad told me tattoos were trashy so I got a giant tattoo saying ‘trashy’ on my back I’ll send you his reaction later”
  • “I’m not a sentimental person but if you touch my teddy bear I will turn you into a stuffed trophy to put next to him”
  • “What do you mean I look smug this is my normal face”
HEY LADIES ❤️

I’ve said this before but after having a conversation with a friend…. Women don’t compliment each other enough! So to the women tagged in this post and the rest of my female followers…

You are GORGEOUS!! You’re smart, funny, ambitious, creative, and unique. I just love your hairstyle(s),outfit(s),shoes, the way you do your makeup and so much more! Baby girl you out here snatching edges and it got me like “yaaaaaaaaaaassssssssss!“😍😍 Oh and CONGRATULATIONS on getting that promotion, getting an A on your exam, perfecting your craft, earning that scholarship, getting a new car, paying off your bills, starting a family, getting ready for graduation, starting and building your own brand, getting a new job, your new relationship, learning a new skill… whatever the case may be, you did it and applaud you! 👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽 With all that being said JUST KEEP SLAYING QUEEN ❤️💅🏽(please feel free to reblog and tag more beautiful queens!!)


@1993-till @47-lxrdshift @aliyahmariabee @ayetrice @bdreamangel @britt-ology @chocolatehoneybliss @differentcomplexion @erlynnsiincere @freevspirit @golden-blissxo @heyyreene @illestcocoa @jennydior @killaaa-f @laurenbria @myniggahplease @negra-blanca @oppositesextract @phenomenalher @tiffanyaliyah @sanstitre-cesttropchic @skugeee @ahsienad @intelligentmelaninqueen

I’ve been asked many times to share some of my deleted scenes from the Raven Cycle. The outtakes. Here’s the thing:

- they do exist. The Dream Thieves is 125k words long, give or take. My outtakes file for it — stuff that I cut out of the draft — is about 150k words long.

- they’re not exciting.

- they are either more boring versions of scenes that are in the book, bits of scenes that were going on for too long, or aborted plot lines. Sometimes they were me just writing my way around in circles while I figured out what I wanted out of life. Bits of book 2 ended up in book 3 and book 1 ended up in book 4, etc. etc. Timelines were always strange — The Dream Thieves used to begin with a prologue where Ronan lost the Camaro to Kavinsky in a drag race, and a lot of the outtakes involve me writing my way out of that. 

That said, here are some bits and bobs from the Dream Thieves outtakes file. Under a cut, because this is a lot of words. Still not even approaching the number of words in the outtakes file. But. A lot of words.

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I Want Your Love In Ink Black

This little thing is based on the Ereri Tattoo AU by Lena that @aurieackerman reposted with permission on tumblr. Thank you for posting it Aurie, I’m in love with that art mmm (~1.5k words)

[Read it on Ao3]


“Hey, babe.”

Little time left before closing hour and it was then that tattooist Levi registered that voice behind him, it had sounded off right after the door bell of Levi’s tattoo shop had stilled eeriely; two words that were enough to dip the room in a sultry resonance.

Levi turned around and met with mischievous emeralds glinting at him hotly. Eren, his gorgeously perfect boyfriend, was smirking at him, teeth dug down on his bottom lip in a oh so sexy way.

He raised a brow at him, his return of a smirk being that of a little tug upward at the corner of his mouth. “You want a new tattoo?”

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As You Wish (Bucky x Reader)

A/N: Hey guys!! Sorry for taking a while to post this so this is a slightly longer one haha. I’m sorry if it’s not that good but I haven’t written smut for quite some time sooooo yeah😅 Anyways, enjoy!!

Request: Oh yay perfect :) Then I dare to request a Little smutty imagine with hot ass Barnes where he’s always shy around you at the compound but then one day everyone is out on a Mission except you two. So you go to the living room in just a towel (cause you think you’re alone) but Bucky happens to be there having his breakfast. So as soon as he sees you, he can’t resist any longer and you both end up having sex? Then you just cuddle and decide to give your relationship a try :) I hope it’s fine :)

Warnings: smut, slight cursing


You sighed and laid back in your bed as you sent the team off for their mission. You didn’t follow along as you had finished a rather tiring mission a few days ago and the others didn’t want you to strain yourself so they made you sit out for this one.

Sitting up, you decided to go take a shower, maybe you’ll just head out to the mall or something, or maybe just get a cup of coffee. As you grabbed your hair tie you tied your hair up in a bun as you headed to the bathroom to freshen up. You went to the shared bathroom instead of your room’s one as the water was always cold there. You really need to remind Tony about it.

You closed the bathroom door and stripped off your clothes stepping into the shower, making sure the water was warm. Sighing in content at the water hit your skin. You looked down at your feet, feeling a bit lonely as you’ll probably would be spending today and tomorrow by yourself.

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BTS reaction to you posting a risky photo on Instagram

this is my first reaction post don’t judge me, it’s really bad

You as their friend posts a pretty ‘risky’ photo on insta. Not per see risky, but just a more attention taking picture. 

(Gifs are not mine & of course reactions here differ from real life)

Namjoon

“Isn’t it a bit to much? No no, you look beautiful!’‘

He really cares about you and knows how rude people can be. Not to mention that your picture makes him a bit flustered himself. Not that he tells you that.

Jin

Jin might not think about it in a sexual way, (what happens in some other guys minds), but does think you look stunning and will defininetly let you know. At least someone has to have a collected mind at these kind of moments.

‘‘You look amazing! But I look more amazing.’‘

Yoongi

‘‘Is that you Y/N? Well damn.’‘

Yoongi wouldn’t hide the fact that he finds it hot at all. He speaks his mind and it lightly surprises him that you even would post a picture like that. \

Hoseok

Probably acting shook but you know he secretly likes the picture afterwards. He admires you for having the guts to post it. (ft jungkook tryna sneak a peek)

‘‘Wow, sorry you suprised me. But you do look pretty good. Not gonna lie.’‘ 

Taehyung

‘‘Oh! You look so perfect. What am I gonna do?’‘‘

Tries to look past the fact that it turns him a bit on. He doesn’t really mind what kind of picture it is, he will like it, it is all eventually you. But it’s easy to see this picture also caught him by surprised.

Jimin

You know the person who is the first to like? Yes in this case it’s Jimin. He will admire you so much, giving you a lot of compliments. But still looks out for you.

‘‘Hey look, Y/N just posted!’‘

‘‘Let me see! Oh, look at her, she looks so good!’‘

Jungkook

Jungshook of course. For a few seconds though, after that he’s totally into it. Just like others admiring you that you posted it. Lowkey screenshots it.

‘‘Oh god, oh okay. Next time we take one together hah?’‘

anonymous asked:

UT main four reaction to their s/o crying because they have tried REALLY hard to make a perfect dinner to celebrate their first year together but messing it all?

Sans:

Listen, babe, he eats junk on the regular. If he can stomach Papyrus’s cooking, he can eat anything you make. Hey, don’t feel too bad about it. You’ll get it next time. If it really bothers you that much, how about you eat out tonight? You can catch a table at Metta’s place, his treat.

Papyrus:

Oh, no, please don’t cry! Sure you messed things up–quite a lot, actually, but it’s not so bad!! Even the Great Papyrus has his down days (though they are very few), so you’re not so different!! If he can fail & learn from his mistakes, so can you! Thankfully, he’s always prepared for situations like this–BEHOLD, his Emergency Spaghetti stash!!!

Undyne:

Wow, you uh…you really tried your best, huh? Man, babe, you suck at cooking!! Listen, don’t worry about it, she can whip something up super quick! & hey, things might not have gone how you planned but…she appreciates it, just know that, okay? You did something nice for her, so now it’s her turn to do something nice for you.

Alphys:

Oh my gosh. Uh…wow, what a great! Uh, meatloaf!! Stew?? (She’s not sure what that is.) You…you really did mess up, huh? Hey, you got farther than she ever has!! Just getting near a kitchen makes her palms sweaty. B-Besides, there’s no shame in just enjoying a couple of ramen bowls, right?

What you did. || Veronica Lodge

Originally posted by twelvevo

Requested : Hi! Could you please write something with “Tell me what they did to you, please.” and Veronica? Maybe with a bullied reader but it’s up to you. Oh and could we use other prompts, too?

[A/N] : hey there! thanks for the ask anon! well not so anonymous hehe.. don’t worry i won’t tell anyone your identity and i won’t post the ask. I’m sorry i made cheryl an asshole, but i couldn’t find anyone else… oh, and yes, you can request anything but im not very comfortable in doing smut, thanks!

Masterlist


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shu-a-la-creme  asked:

Hey!! I saw this prompt on a tumblr post and I thought that it would be perfect for Merthur: “your horrible car is in my parking lot like i know it doesn’t have a name but it’s my parking lot i’ve grown attached to it so why don’t you move your horrible car and get your ugly f—oh my god you’re hot HELLO THERE” au

I hope you don’t mind that I slightly shifted the prompt (not too much!) Enjoy !

***

The Ugliest Car in the World was parked in the customer designated space in front of Arthur’s shop. It looked like it was the same age as Arthur (which for a car was old, but for Arthur it was a perfectly fine age, thank you). It had at least three dents which Arthur could see, appeared to be filled with junk (blankets, trash, bags of stuff). Not to mention it was gold. My god, it wasn’t the seventies anymore. No one had gold cars and even if they did, this car’s paint job had seen better days.

There were two distinct spots in front of Arthur’s shop which read ‘Carpenter Customer Parking’ in clear print. This was a busy street with a dozen little shops full of customers. Arthur needed these spots for his guests! Poor Alice had come into his shop to tell him that all the spots had been taken and she had to walk down the block. How was he to load her rocking chair into her car without a spot in front of his shop! Whoever owned this car had clearly ignored the label with malicious intent in their hearts and used Arthur’s car spots with evil glee.

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Okay so I saw this post over on @necromantrix​‘s blog and I says to her, “Hey, y’know what? ASOUE also has a weird anachronistic setting. LET US COMBINE” and really after talking about it awhile it turns out that Cabal and Co. are accidentally the perfect guardians for Violet, Klaus and Sunny?

Allow me to make our case through my preferred medium of bullet points:

  • Cabal’s gut reaction being “c h i l d r e n  oh god yuck get rid of them” and then later relaxing because “oh thank god, they’re smart” 
  • Cabal deciding to capitalise on the Baudelaire’s talents and enlisting them as Necromancy Minions after they reconcile themselves with the fact that this tall German weirdo who became their guardian quite by accident works with corpses all day and what’s more, that said corpses aren’t actually that dangerous (with a few exceptions but that’s why we have the hand cannon)
  • Violet gets to assist by constructing-arcane-necromancy-assisting-apparatus and Klaus gets to do what Klaus does best and make himself a little Klaus booknest in Cabal’s library where he can help by researching esoteric eldritch knowledge from ancient tomes
  • Horst is there because of course he is, he spoils the Baudelaires by making them cake at every available opportunity and living vicariously through them
  • Sunny turning out to have immense talent at cooking (because canonically that becomes Her Super Special Skill later on in the books) and ending up becoming her new weird vampire uncle’s Official Baking Minion
  • Sunny teaching Horst how to bite solid objects into Interesting Shapes with his vampire teeth and Horst subsequently showing off his new skill at parties 
  • Horst, in turn, gets Sunny The Most Fashionable Baby Clothes which is great because Sunny is seriously starting to grow out of her stuff at a truly alarming rate
  • Horst never expected that his new best friend would be a BABY of all things but here we are I guess a dorky vampire and a literal infant are my new BROTP
  • Leonie finding out about all this and being H O R R I F I E D 
  • Leonie is 100000000% prepared to bundle up all the children’s shit and take them to her house far away from Cabal to Raise The Children Herself and Properly, Dammit but it turns out that the Baudelaires have started becoming really happy in their new situation with their New Goth Mad Science Magician Dad and Their Cool New Vampire Uncle so Leonie is just like “I gUESS?!”
  • Leonie decides to stick around more anyway because Someone Has To Be The Sensible Guardian Around Here And Goddamn It If It Isn’t Going To Be Me
  • The garden murderfairies all give Sunny a free pass because She is Good And Pure And Automatically Okay
  • Cabal slowly coming to realise that he would die for these kids if only because he knows he’s taught them enough that they can successfully bring him back to life

anonymous asked:

Hi! Do you guys know which fic it was when bellarke got fake married so bellamy could use clarke's medical benefits bc he had cancer? thank you :)

Anonymous asked: ‘Hi - I’m looking for a bellarke fic where Clarke and Bellamy are the only ones left of skaikru, and they start having sex so Clarke can have a baby but ignore feelings for a while!’

This sounds like Survivor’s Guilt.

Anonymous asked: ‘any good met-on-ark reunited on ground fics around lately?’

Check here.

Anonymous asked: ‘Hİ ! I ’m looking for fics in the POVs of the delinquents , how they see bellarke develop and what they think about it . Thank you so much .’

Check out our Outside POV tag.

Anonymous asked: ‘Hi there! Are there any fics based on during/post the Bellarke scene in S3e3? Thanks in advance!’

Anonymous asked: ‘Hello I was looking for fics which are inspired by Perfect or Hearts Dont Break Around Here from Ed Sheeran’s new album, maybe its too soon but I want some modern poetry inspired fluff!!’

Anonymous asked: ‘Hey, can you give me some future fics with smut? Thank you!!’

Try this search tag.

HEY DARLINGS, IT’S DARIA HERE! ٩( ᐛ )و

I’ve recently hit 1000+ followers and omg??? How is this even possible?? Anyways, we can skip all the excitement and my pointless babbling and move to the most important part - I’ve decided to do blogrates to thank all of you and to celebrate this big number!! 

Rules for participation are pretty simple and usual, my little stars:

  • must be following me - I’ll check!
  • reblog this post;
  • it’s best if you’re a studyblr, but I’d probably do aesthetic blogs too (if a studyblr is your side blog, send me the link or the username!). Oh and also send me the link for your original content if you post any and it’s not so easy to find!
  • send me an ask including your favourite quote, song, movie or a book or even a favourite celebrity, literally anything! Let’s get to know something else about each other, not school-related stuff only! Oh, and put smth like (br) in the beginning or end of the ask yup? 
  • ratings:
    • url: this one is nice! // oh wow, THIS is interesting! // hey it’s so great, how did you come up to it? // OMG I TOTALLY GET IT! 
    • blog title: it’s lovely, but I’m dumb and I don’t get it :c // heeeeyyyooo I like it! // omg have I just seen perfection? // CAN YOU TEACH ME HOW DID YOU COME UP WITH THIS PLS?
    • mobile/desktop theme (I’ll most probably check one of yours and I’ll specify which!): it’s not my taste I suppose, but it’s great! // yessss, it’s so cute! // I need to know the code!! // CAN I BUY THIS FROM YOU?
    • original content (if any): carry on posting, I’m sure the community likes it! (screw my tastes lmao) // omg it’s so cute I wanna cry // this is a masterpiece darling // be my mentor pls??
  • I don’t include the ‘following’ section but I need new little stars in my feed so I’ll check all of you out and I may specify it or you’ll see it in your notifications! ★彡
  • if it doesn’t get, like, 20 participants, let’s pretend it never happened and I don’t exist lol 

I look forward to seeing all of your wonderful blogs!! ♡

Love,

Daria x

youtube

Hello, all! Voice acting auditions for the contestants of Camp of Calamity are now open!

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anonymous asked:

hey I saww your like on one of the Be More Chill posts and just discouvered your blog! if you had a Squip what would it look like if you could choose?

Oh hey what a sweet message!! Hope you enjoy your stay, dear! :DD
And honestly

It’d probably look like Virus!Cry!!~ >v<-)9

slowlymakingstars  asked:

Oh how fun! May I please ask for some general headcanons on Akaashi? 😊

Hey, thanks for sending this in! 

I love doing headcanons ^_^ I hope you like these!

  1. Everyone thinks Bokuto’s often outrageous ideas are all his own. Actually, a huge chunk of them are musings Akaashi has wondered out loud when it’s just him and Bokuto (no one believes Bokuto when he claims this though, understandably).
  2. Not a single picture exists in which Akaashi looks less than perfect. It’s not because of his photogenic self (though that certainly helps), or the Barney Stinson-like magic of looking good in every picture. Instead, there’s a widespread rumor that Akaashi will blackmail the photographer into deleting unflattering images, and while this is untrue, Akaashi has done nothing to discourage the spread or disprove it. Sometimes, this rumor alone frightens photographers into deleting unflattering pictures.
  3. Akaashi knows not only Bokuto’s weaknesses but also the weaknesses of everyone on the team, “as a setter should”, according to him. And this is what makes him the first to figure out when something is wrong with someone, always.
  4. Akaashi enjoys pranking his teammates, but they never figure out it’s him. Bokuto’s pranks reveal that he’s behind them far more often, so sometimes he gets blamed for ones he had nothing to do with, and Akaashi had EVERYTHING to do with.
  5. He’s really meticulous and organized. The Fukurodani managers appreciate it a lot when he offers to help with their duties (mostly because they know he’ll actually do stuff and not just stick around to flirt or be useless). 
  6. Very few people have seen him laugh outright, and those who have say it is their most precious memory of Akaashi. Bokuto often pouts because he hasn’t. Yet (Akaashi is saving it for a special moment).
  7. He has a really good rate of metabolism. His teammates often grumble that despite his monstrous appetite (this is canon btw), he doesn’t appear to gain any weight. “How is it” Konoha had complained once, “That you’re smart, good at sports, good looking, and have no problems with maintaining your weight?” Akaashi declined to comment.
  8. He is the epitome of the word ‘respectful’. His teachers almost want to create a new award for “Most Respectful Student” just to be able to give it to him. 
  9. He’s also involved in student government. Towards the end of his second year, Akaashi had been asked to become the Student Council President, but he had declined, stating “the volleyball club is a handful by itself already”.

Hope you enjoy these! Have a wonderful day/night!

Ask me stuff about Haikyuu!!

somanyofthekids replied to your post: somanyofthekids replied to your post: At one point…

“Caught lying” jesus, I just rolled my eyes so hard that I’m a little worried about eye strain.

It would have been the perfect opening, right?! “Oh, she doesn’t know anything about Deadpool. Hey, you wanna go grab chimichangas and I’ll tell you a bit about him?” I WOULDA BEEN SOLD ON THAT COME ON YOU STUPID NERD BOYS.